Work Text:
It was a pretty average day, nothing particularly unusual. Payday was yesterday, and as you had some extra funds, you decided to head out to the local Sephora to splurge on some new makeup. Your concealer was running out, anyways. As you pull up to the mall and lock your car, you decided on what you’d like to buy. Perhaps some new mascara, or maybe a new highlighter…
A large, muscular man greeted you as you entered the store. He had a strange accent that you couldn’t quite put your finger on, and he had incredibly long and voluminous purple hair. Not only that, but his makeup was incredible. He was quite intimidating, but had a warm and friendly smile that eased your nerves.
“Hello there, welcome to Sephora! Looking for anything specific today?” he asked. You shook your head and explained that you were just browsing. “Great! Well, if you need any help, don’t hesitate to ask! My name is Kars if you need me, or you could ask my coworker, Dio. He’s usually in the back of the store.” You thanked him and began browsing the aisles, looking for a new concealer and something extra.
As you made your way to the back of the store to look at the lipsticks, something caught your eye. It looked like… smoke? No, it couldn’t be… You walked over to investigate. It smelled strange, unlike anything you had smelled before. It seemed to be coming from behind the shelf of lipsticks against the wall.
You carefully moved some lipsticks out of the way and peered at the shelf. Behind it seemed to be an empty room full of smoke. Suddenly, a man’s face came into view, looking straight at you. He had a very defined face, with spiky blond hair and a green headband with a heart on it. He put a pipe to his mouth, inhaled, then blew out the smoke right on your face.
“Pffphll… What the hell? Who are you?” you asked, coughing from the smoke.
“I am Dio, and I smoketh opium.”
“Opium?”
“Yes.”
“Like, for real? The real deal opium? Like what Britain sold to China opium?”
“Mm hmm. Would you like some?” he asked, offering you the pipe.
You were a bit tempted, but gave it more thought and politely declined. You began putting the lipstick back into place and exited without another word.
You simply continued shopping as normal, trying to ignore the fact you had just met a man smoking OPIUM in a Sephora. Finally you decided on what you decided to buy and went to the register to get rung up. Kars was apparently on cashier duty for now, as the store was mostly empty aside from a tall girl with dreads and green lipstick you had seen enter earlier. As you and Kars made small talk about your makeup choices, a loud scream was heard.
“WHAT THE FUCK? OPIUM?? HELL NO!! WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK I AM??” The girl charged out of the store, yelling for security.
Kars sighed. “Oh dear, not again… Dio, are you smoking opium back there again? I told you if you were caught again you’d be fired… Oh, I’m sorry. Here are your things.” He handed you your bags and began walking to the back of the store. This was all too much for today and you left wordlessly, staying silent and stunned as you left the mall, got in your car, and drove home.