Archive of Our Own ^beta

Steve and Nat find a tsum tsum trapped in a hydra base and against his better judgment and SHIELD mission guidelines, Steve takes the poor tsum in, he soon regrets it though as the tsum tsum fights him on everything. It doesn’t want his soul energy, it tries to frequently escape. He thinks that it pooped in his art drawer but can’t be certain because he’s unsure if tsum tsums poop, however the drawer reeks.

The feisty little tsum, is currently trying to chew through the acrylic tank Steve has trapped it in. He’s nursing his hands with bandages, as the tsum has sharp teeth. He’s not sure what to do with it at this point. He’d thought that it would have been easier then this but he can see that hydra had done something to it.

He’s running out of time, Tony will be back from some SI thing and he’s not figured out what to do with the tsum. He’s not going to drop it at the pound, he’s not even sure if animal rescue takes tsums. Natasha only smirks at him when he tries to ask for her help, she had recited the SHIELD mission guidelines the first time Steve had brought it up. Technically he was to take the tsum to SHIELD for it to be processed, which undoubtedly it would escape.

He places a heavy book on the top of the cage, having seen it jump. He didn’t want to hunt it down again, maybe it needed some music or something to calm down, food, warmth? He picked up his tablet to research what tsums needed, while choosing to play some classical music.

Half an hour in and there wasn’t really anything decisive about Tsum care besides soul energy, there was a common consensus that tsums were very social, one article read about how their tsum could have a little salami but not too much, apparently the tsum would fart if fed too much salami. The music was having no effect on the tsum which had moved on to tearing up the plastic plant in the tank. Occasionally hissing at Steve when it saw him looking at it, it reminded him of that old tom cat that hung around his apartment back in brooklyn before the war.

“Shit.”
Steve realizing he was stuck with probably the most unfriendliest of tsums, how was he going to tell Tony? How was he going to admit he broke the rules and was now paying for it? Actually that would be easy, Tony would probably laughing his ass off. Steve smiled he’d actually enjoy that part probably not the few hundred times Tony would bring it up later but seeing Tony, on the floor laughing till he can’t breath. Almost worth it, still he had to come up with a better way to care for the tsum.

The soft portable pet pouch had arrived before Tony, and he’d managed to wrangle the ornary tsum into it, with a bit of salami which the tsum was eating, loudly and angrily. Steve just wanted the tsum to gain some weight and hopefully mellow out. He washed his hands off and reapplied the plasters. The little nicks and bite wounds would heal up, hopefully before Tony came home

They did clear up, Steve was working on a crossword puzzle, with the tsum. The tsum was CROSS and was trying to bite Steve through the thick padding of the pouch. Tony breezed in in his delectable three piece suit, he made a b line to Steve and kissed him. The tsum now squished between them protested with a literal hissy fit. Tony pulled back eyes drifting down, as he poked the irate pouch.

“Look, I regret it.”
“Did you get pregnant with a ball of rage? Are you cheating on me?”
Tony voice was light as he inspected the pouch, the tsum was hiding in the padding but still hissing.
“I made a mistake, I didn’t follow the rules and now I regret it.”
“Oh… you took something from a base without SHIELD processing it? What kinda bribe do I get not to tell Clint?”
Steve leaned in to kiss Tony only to have the tsum hiss loudly, at the squishing.
“Sorry I don’t know what to do with it, I’ve tried everything. Even a little salami.”

Tony poked the pouch again, Steve could feel the tsum trying to escape the finger, while hissing mightily.
“Let me try, you got him from the hydra facility? Hey there, oh yes that is a scary hiss. You’ve been making Steve work haven’t you?”
Tony took the pouch slinging it over his suit and smiled at it.
“If you wanted a pet Steve, I think we got one.”

Steve refrained from saying ‘pet project’ because he knew that look, and the way the pouch quieted down, maybe Tony would have better luck. If not Steve would help cover Tony in pasters, kiss ever little bite and scratch. That was the last Steve saw of Tony for two days, Jarvis kept him updated though Tony seemed to be warming the tsum up.

The third day Steve sought Tony out with a plate of sandwiches and found the tsum, sitting on Tony’s shoulder humming. Tony smiled at Steve lifting up the goggles and offering a hand to the tsum, but it clung to his neck and Tony gave Steve a half shrug. The tsum was staring at Steve, the cheerful humming had stopped.

“I got the tsum a little salami?”
Steve offered the tick cut slice on a napkin and the tsum made a disagreeable churring noise. Though it carefully climbed down without Tony’s assistance and plopped down on the napkin to eat. It was rounder now no doubt Tony had fed it lots of soul energy.
“Winter just needed some time. He was pretty sure you were his mission.”
Tony looked amused while he ate his sandwich, grinning behind it at Steve.

“Was he trying to terminate me?”
“yes,”
“So he’s imprinted on the real winter soldier?”
“Most likely, but we’ve already fixed the meddling of hydra in his head. Tsums are far more adaptable than what I initially thought. So we might have better groundwork for when we finally find him.”
Steve inhaled it was such good news, and that Tony had managed to help the tsum as well. He turned to the winter tsum.
“Thank you winter.”
He got a single begrudging ‘Tsum’ noise as Winter climbed back up Tony's arm.

Tony offered a single finger and Steve watched how Winter rubbed himself all over it. The tsum was staring at Steve as it rubbed up against the finger. It almost felt as if it was challenging his claim to Tony, which was silly. Right?

“He’s super protective of me, I expect once he gets used to everyone he’ll mellow out some.” Tony came to an elaborate set up, on one of his tables a sorta cage but with no doors. There was a nest of rags and an exercise wheel, one of the water bottles, and a well chewed block of wood.
“Okay Winter, it's Steve time Don’t give me that, you agreed. Yes I will.”
Tony chatted with the Tsum, and eventually he was able to lower the surely looking thing into the open top of the home. Where winter stuck it's tongue at Steve and then promptly burrowed into the rag nest, with short angry ‘Tsum!’ nosies.

“Awe he pouts adorably too.”
Tony tugged on Steve’s arm back up to the penthouse. Steve buried his head into Tony’s hair.
“I was worried he was going to replace me.”
“You, never. Come on I’m ready for the bribe hot stuff.”