Having such an unconventional relationship was not the direction either Taehyung or Jimin expected their relationship to go when they first met...

I.

It all started when Taehyung saw a cute guy in his workplace. As an art teacher, he usually spent most of his time trying to make teenagers understand the difference between magenta and fuchsia, and that leaving brushes with paint to dry was a terrible idea (not that they actually paid attention to him, of course). It was just part of the job, and honestly, Taehyung wouldn’t change it for anything. But it also meant that he spent most of his time secluded in the art part of the school not really interacting with most of the other teachers.

One particular day, halfway through the second month of class, he was eating his lunch when he received a text. 

Joonie: Come to my classroom.

Now, he loved Namjoon. Really. He was the best friend/cousin he could have wished for, but the English area of the school was at the opposite end of the school and Taehyung did not want to walk over there when there were only 15 minutes left until his next class. 

Taetae: now y would i do that? 

Joonie: I hv strawberries for u. 

Well, Tae was also weak for strawberries. 

Taetae: b there in 5

Taehyung rapidly grabbed his keys and phone and exited his room. While walking, he couldn’t help but wonder what was the real reason Namjoon needed him. He knew him well enough that he wouldn’t be bribing him with strawberries if it wasn’t for a reason, as he usually just gave him food for free (he loved his hyung for that). Taehyung adjusted his glasses, which were falling after he walked down the stairs, and finally reached his cousin’s classroom. 

No matter how much shit he receives because of it, Taehyung swears that as soon as he stepped into the room and saw Jimin, he started to hear bells ringing out of nowhere. 

Jimin was a physically beautiful person. Of course, later on, Taehyung would learn that his personality was even more beautiful, but… The moment Taehyung saw him smiling, his eyes disappearing while he extended his hand (omg, his tiny hands), he knew he was already falling for the guy. 

“Hi, you must be Namjoon-hyung’s cousin, right? I’m Park Jimin.” Holy shit, his voice , Taehyung thought. It was so soft. 

Taehyung’s brain stopped working for a few seconds, his jaw slightly dropping. He was in the presence of an angel. He could hear Namjoon saying something in the background, but he didn’t care at the moment. Only when he saw Jimin pulling his hand away was Taehyung snapped out of his trance. He grabbed Jimin’s hand and shook it vigorously.

“Taehyung! I’m Kim Taehyung.” He gave Jimin a big simile, noticing a faint blush on the other’s cheeks. His smile just increased. He wasn’t the only one affected, then. 

“Nice to meet you, Taehyung-ssi.” His name sounded so good in Jimin’s voice. Taehyung wanted to record it so he could replay it a million times again. After a couple of seconds in silence, Taehyung realized he was still grabbing Jimin’s tiny hand. He also noticed how his big hands made Jimin’s look extra tiny. 

Yup, this was it. This was the way Taehung instantaneously fell in love with a complete stranger.  

Namjoon fake-coughed. Taehyung finally looked at his cousin. 

“Oh, hey hyung. Did you need me?” Namjoon was smiling like always, dimples showing. But Taehung knew he was amused by what he just watched (call it knowing his cousin after decades of knowing each other, but he just knew when Namjoon was getting ready to give him shit for something). 

“Yeah. I was going to ask you if you could help Jiminie here. He’s one of the geometry teachers and he needs some figures to show his students how three-dimensional shapes work, and since you’re an art teacher, I thought you might be able to help him. Only if you want to, of course.” The grin became a smirk in seconds, Namjoon’s eyes shining with something Taehyung did not want to discuss at the moment. 

“It can be something small, Taehyung-ssi. I wouldn’t want to take too much of your time,” Jimin added, suddenly looking at him shyly. Taehyung wanted to coo at him, and maybe pinch his cheeks. 

Definitely pinch his cheeks. 

“Of course I would want to help. Here,” he gave Jimin his phone, “what do you think if we talk more about this after school? My next class starts in 7 minutes and we both probably need to go now, but I promise I’ll text you so we can discuss the details over some coffee. What do you think?” Taehyung internally thanked himself for always being a collected gay. He couldn’t panic in front of such a gorgeous person, nor let his opportunity go. He wanted to get to know Jimin, wine him, and date him. 

Jimin looked surprised, but his face morphed into a grin, shyness nowhere to be seen. “Oh, are you taking me on a date? I usually wait at least a couple of days before I go out with strangers, but since you’re extra cute I’ll make an exception today.” He grabbed Taehyung’s phone and put his number in. When Taehyung took it back, he noticed that beside the Jiminie there was a purple heart. “Now, it’s time to go. See you later hyung, Taehyung” He winked at Taehyung before leaving. 

Taehyung sat on a chair beside Namjoon’s desk, smiling. 

“I can’t believe that just happened.” Namjoon said, patting Taehyung’s back. “If I had known that you two would hit it off so easily I would have made you meet before.” 

“How do you even know him, hyung? He’s…” 

“A sexy mochi?” Namjoon suggested. 

“An angel.” 

“Well, that he is. But I don’t think you’ll like to know how we met.” Taehyung looked at his cousin, confused. 

“What do you mean? Of course I would love to know. Is he one of your college friends?” Namjoon took some papers from his desk, making a pile near the corner. Taehyung supposed it was for his next class. He also supposed Namjoon just wanted to keep his hands busy, for some reason. 

Taehyung felt a slight something in his chest.

“Stop ignoring me,” Taehyung whined, but he knew he would get nothing by nagging his hyung. He murmured a goodbye before walking through the door. Just as the bell rang, Namjoon spoke again.

“He’s my ex-boyfriend, Taehyung.”

✩✩✩

“So, what do you have in mind?” Taehyung asked, giving Jimin his coffee. Taehyung had ordered some hot chocolate for himself, enjoying the sweet taste on his tongue. He surely needed it.

After Namjoon’s revelation, Taehyung had spent the rest of the day trying to calm himself before having to face Jimin. Clearly, Namjoon didn’t have any problem with Taehyung and Jimin flirting. He would have said something otherwise. But still, it didn’t sit right in his stomach to date his cousin’s ex. 

But Jimin was just so cute… 

Taehyung noticed that he wasn’t paying attention to what Jimin was saying, lost in his mind. He blinked and tried to concentrate. 

Jimin was talking about how most of his students couldn’t understand what area and perimeter meant, and how they struggled to even understand how all sides of a heptagon work, so he needed something he could assemble and disassemble without damaging it. Taehyung had an idea of how to build one, and he explained it to Jimin. He also said he could decorate it so it wouldn’t look too plain. 

They spent around an hour just talking about their project, then talking about their day at work. Taehyung was enjoying this date (he was going to call it a date since that was the term Jimin referred to it as, but he wasn’t planning on voicing that out) a lot. 

“So, you found out about the job thanks to hyung?” Taehyung asked. 

“Yes. I spent two years working at the middle school near here and realized that the younger the kids were, the more… difficult they could get, so I wanted to transfer to some high school. I talked about it with Namjoonie-hyung and he told me that one of the math teachers here had just retired. I applied, got the job, and here we are.” Jimin looked like he wanted to add something, so Taehyung stayed silent. “I’m guessing Namjoon told you already how we know each other.” 

Taehyung cringed internally. Oh, so they were going to have that conversation today. “Well, he told me you two used to date just before the bell rang so that’s all I know.” 

“Look…” Jimin bit his lips, looking at Taehyung straight to the eye. “We both know that we both are attracted to each other, and we are old enough to be straightforward about this. Yeah, Namjoonie-hyung and I dated back in college. We were together for about a year and a half, it ended during my sophomore year. It wasn’t a problematic breakup, and we’re still friends. Is that going to affect my chance with you?”

Taehyung remained in silence, processing what he was told. So, it had been around seven years since they had broken up. It was a long time ago. And did it really matter? They both have obviously moved on, so why couldn’t Taehyung give it a shot too? The worst-case scenario would be that their relationship didn’t work, but even then Taehyung doubted it would really be a big deal. Jimin was right, they were both adults. They could handle this. 

“No,” Taehyung said, “it won’t affect it in the slightest.” 

If anything, there was another thing Taehyung was more worried about that might affect them. But he didn’t want to talk about it with Jimin. Not yet, anyway. 

Too soon for that. 

✩✩✩

A month and six dates later, Taehyung found himself resting his head on Jimin’s thigh, enjoying the hand caressing his hair. Jimin was busy grading some papers (one of the good things about being an art teacher was that he had way less work than others). 

Around the third date, Taehyung and Jimin had gone clubbing and got drunk, which ended up with them cuddling in Jimin’s house. To Taehyung’s delight, Jimin loved cuddling as much as he did, and he didn’t mind having Taehyung hugging him all the time. He could notice how their relationship, their casual dates, those were morphing into something more serious. They were basically boyfriends, yet neither had asked the question needed to make it official. But it was ok, they were just taking their time.

Taehyung felt… Nice. 

He was also extremely worried. 

Taehyung really, really liked Jimin. All the time they spent together was amazing and he could perfectly see himself falling in love with him. They just… clicked in a way Taehyung had never experienced before. 

Not that his previous experiences were that great, though. 

That is actually a topic he had yet to discuss with Jimin. For all the time they spend talking (most of their free time, actually), they hadn’t delved deep into their previous relationships or anything related (ignoring the whole Namjoon thing, but even then it was only during their first date. It could barely be called a conversation). It was like they had a non-verbal agreement to not discuss anything that could put them in a bad place so soon. 

But also, Taehyung knew that sooner or later they would need to talk about it. So he decided to have it sooner. 

“Jiminie,” Taehying called, moving from his position. Jimin looked at him through his glasses, stopping his grading momentarily. 

“Yes?” 

“I… Why did you and Namjoon-hyung break up?” 

Jimin clearly did not expect that question, eyes wide open. He dropped his pen, but didn’t make any attempt to retrieve it. “Why do you want to know so suddenly?” 

Taehyung felt his face getting hotter. “Well. I just realized we haven’t really talked much about our previous… relationships, and since I already know that you dated Namjoon, I thought we could… I don’t know, start with him?” Jimin kept quiet, frowning slightly. Did he not want to talk about it? Taehyung got nervous. He had thought this would be the best way of starting a conversation about… well, Taehyung wasn’t really sure where he was going with this, but it seemed like a good idea three minutes ago. 

He was kind of regretting that. 

Before Taehyung could change the topic, Jimin sighed. “I’m not sure how much you know about Namjoon’s love life, but I guess it isn’t that much since you didn’t know who I was.” He took off his glasses, rubbing his eyes. “I told you we started dating when I was a freshman, right?” Taehyung nodded. “Well, we didn’t really start dating from nowhere per se. There was this senior, Kim Seokjin...” 

Kim Seokjin? Now, that name Taehyung did recognize.

“Oh, I know him. He used to be hyung’s boyfriend! I got to meet him a couple of times, especially after I moved near hyung for college. I think they broke up when hyung was a jun-” Taehyung stopped himself, blinking. 

Wait what. 

There was something wrong. He remembered his cousin and Kim Seokjin had broken up when Taehyung himself was a sophomore because Seokjin had graduated the semester before and it wasn’t working anymore with their schedules. 

But… 

Jimin had said Namjoon and he had broken up when Jimin was a sophomore, and they had dated for a year and a half before… 

“No way.” Taehyung said, standing up immediately. “You… Hyung cheated on Kim Seokjin with you?!” 

Jimin looked scandalized, and he started shaking his head. His voice trembled a little. “No, god. Tae. It wasn’t like that,” He stood up, grabbing Taehyung’s arm. “He didn’t cheat on anyone. Jin-hyung and I, well, we knew he was dating both of us. We were dating too, after all.” 

Taehyung was so confused.

“You are telling me… You were in a relationship with hyung and hyung’s boyfriend?” Jimin nodded. Taehyung blinked again. “I–I gotta be honest, I wasn’t expecting this when I asked about your relationship with Namjoon.” Jimin just laughed, but it sounded fake. It wasn't Jimin's laugh, it was… different. Almost sad. 

“Well, it’s not something I can explain to everybody. Some people can react… people react in different ways when they know you are in a polyamorous relationship.” He released Taehyung’s arm, and he stared at his own feet. “Sometimes they don’t understand that you can love more than one person at the same time.”

Taehyung felt pain in his chest when he saw how it obviously affected Jimin. He wrapped his arms around him, kissing the top of his head. 

“If they can’t love all of you, then they don’t deserve you, Jimin-ah,” He felt the moment Jimin started crying, tears wetting his shirt. “There’s nothing wrong with the way you love.” 

“Y-You don’t have any problems with it then?” Jimin asked.

“No. The only thing that is important to me is that you’re happy.” And Taehyung was telling the truth. Even if he and Jimin had just started dating recently, Taehyung already knew he wanted to give his everything to Jimin. He deserved all the love in the world, after all. 

Jimin looked up, his eyes puffy and full of tears. Even when crying, Park Jimin was the most beautiful person Taehyung had ever seen. 

“I think that I love you, Kim Taehyung,” Jimin whispered, moving his arm to Taehyung’s neck. He was finally smiling. 

“Oh, that’s good,” Taehyung lowered his head a bit, his forehead touching Jimin’s, “because I fell in love the moment I saw you, Park Jimin.” 

Jimin moved his head a bit, catching Taehyung’s lips with his. 

Now, Taehyung really liked kissing to a certain extent. He liked the intimacy of it, and it made him feel closer to his partner. Right now, he tried to convey all his love for Jimin in the form of a kiss. Taehyung knew he needed comfort. 

The kiss lasted barely 20 seconds, with Tae being the one to separate them. 

“Would you be my boyfriend, Jimin-ah?” Jimin just giggled. 

“I thought you would never ask.” 

✩✩✩

That night, as Taehyung felt Jimin’s arms around him, he realized that there was no other place he ever wanted to be.

✩✩✩

“I need to talk to you.” 

Namjoon looked away from his computer. It was early in the morning, way before his class was supposed to begin, yet Taehyung was there, walking in circles like a caged animal.  

“Did anything happen?”

“No. Well, yeah, something did happen. But that’s not–” Taehyung took a deep breath. “Jimin told me about what happened with Kim Seokjin.” He waited for some kind of panic, or maybe some anger. He got neither. Namjoon’s face did not betray any feeling. He just blankly stared at his cousin. 

“I figured he eventually would tell you about it.” 

“Why did you never tell me? Not like you owe me explanations, but… Why? I always believed you only dated Seokjin, you never told me about Jimin.” 

“I wasn’t expecting to fall for Jiminie too. Neither of us did.” Namjoon pointed at the chair beside him. “Sit down. I’ll tell you what happened.” He sighed. “Where do I even begin? You already know Seokjin and I got together when we were in high school. It was really hard at the time because he was two years my senior, so while I was struggling to adapt to high school he was already worrying about college. Nonetheless, we got to know each other, and we started dating.” 

“Yeah, I know this part. You always talked about him being the most beautiful boy in the whole world.” Namjoon smiled at those words. 

“Yeah, he still is as beautiful as always… He’s a lawyer now, did you know? And a very successful one.” 

“I am happy for him, but that’s not what I want to know, hyung.” Taehyung really did not want to press Namjoon too much, but… He needed answers. 

“I know, I know. So, we dated for four years when, during my sophomore year, one of my friends brought Jimin with him one day during lunch. He had claimed that we were all adopting Jimin into our group of friends since he was new in the city and didn’t have any other friends. No one really had any reason to object, so Jimin just became part of us. 

We all hung out a lot, but since Jimin and I were both education majors, and we both shared some classes, we often studied together. It also helped that we were kind of nerds, so we naturally got along really well. It was the same thing with Jin-hyung. The first day they met Jimin laughed at Jin-hyung’s jokes, like, genuinely laughed, and from there they just became friends. Jin-hyung loved Jimin, always taking care of him. I did too. Soon, we found ourselves inviting Jimin to our dates, and it just felt right, you know? It was difficult, but eventually, we realized that we all liked each other, so we started dating. A lot of people couldn’t understand that we all were happy with each other, and since Jin-hyung and I were already a couple beforehand, Jimin was the one who suffered the most as a consequence. People thought he was a “homewrecker”, or that he was seducing Hyung and me just to ruin our relationship. There was more, but Jimin never liked to tell us about all that actually went down. We still knew it wasn’t pretty.” He paused for a second. “Humanity is always the cruelest towards the most beautiful souls.” 

Taehyung wanted to cry. It hurt to know that someone so dear to him, someone he loved so much, had suffered in any way. How could people be so… mean toward someone like Jimin? It sounded like some kind of punishable act, to hurt Jimin. But it was in the past, and Taehyung knew there wasn't a lot he could do to fix that.  “But you didn’t break up because of that, did you?”

“No. We were able to maintain our relationship until Jin-hyung graduated and went to law school. He needed to be in a different place, and neither Jimin or me wanted to continue without Jin-hyung, so we broke up. It was ok, though. We continued being friends after that.” 

“You don’t love him anymore, do you?” The question was out of his mouth before Taehyung could really stop it, and he felt terrible for asking. He wanted to know, but at the same time, he didn’t know if he would like the answer. Namjoon gave him a weak smile. 

“I think I will never stop loving them both, Taheyung-ah. But I’ve moved on, and so have they.” 

✩✩✩

When Taehyung woke up, the first thing he noticed was that it was still dark outside. 

He had been dreaming about something, but as it always happened, he couldn’t remember what happened in his dream. It always bothered Taehyung, not being able to remember his own dreams despite how hard he wished he could. The worst part was that, because of his mind trying so hard to retain everything, he also could never fall back to sleep. This time, he didn’t even try. He just let his gaze focus on the window near his bed, his mind going another direction, away from dreams. 

It had been two months since he had asked Jimin to be his boyfriend, and Taehyung wondered if Jimin thought it was weird that they hadn’t gotten past some kisses and cuddling. He hadn’t said anything yet, but Taehyung knew (well, Namjoon had told him, actually) that Jimin was someone who liked to have an active sexual life. So many times Taehyung had thought Jimin would leave him because of the lack of sexual activities in their relationship. It scared Taehyung, the thought of losing someone so important over sex. Of course, he knew (or, at least, he hoped) Jimin would never leave him per se, but he also wasn’t sure of what reaction he would get, so his mind always made up situations in which the worst-case scenarios occurred.

When he asked Namjoon, he had only gotten a snort as an answer. 

“I’m serious, hyung. He could leave me. I don’t want my heart to break.” 

“Do you really think Jimin would be capable of doing something like that?” Asked Namjoon, slightly amused. 

“No, but maybe it is too much? Maybe he wants to have sex or… I don’t know, stuff, and I can’t give him that, hyung.” Taehyung curled into himself. “I’m scared.” 

“I don’t think you should worry about it, Tae. Who knows? You might get a different answer from what you expect.” Namjoon’s eyes shone for a second. Taehyung looked at him, suspicious. 

“You know something, don’t you?” 

Namjoon laughed. “Maybe, but I won’t tell you anything.” He ruffled Taehyung’s hair. “Now, you need to go. You have a class next period and I need to go for lunch.” 

“But hyung-” 

“Shhh. Now go, Taehyung-ah.” 

Taehyung sighed and walked out of the room, his mind still full of What Ifs. He was careful not to make any sound, not wanting to wake his boyfriend up. 

One thing was his brain not letting him rest, another thing was him being the reason why Jimin couldn’t do the same. 

He went to the kitchen, getting himself some water, before sitting on the couch. They were sleeping that night at Taehyung’s apartment, being the one closest to the high school. Jimin already had a good amount of his clothes and stuff inside two of Taehyung’s drawers, as well as a key to his apartment. Taehyung wasn’t sure if they were going too slow or too fast, but Jimin never complained about it, and neither did Taehyung. Only once, Taehyung recalled, did Jimin seem to want to do something about it. They had been on the couch, slowly kissing, when Taehyung felt Jimin’s tongue touching his lips and his hand going a little too far south. He immediately broke the kiss, excusing himself saying that he had forgotten he needed to call his hyung, and ran to the bathroom. He sat on top of the toilet, taking deep breaths, trying to calm himself. Once he was ok, he went to the sink and tried to clean his lips.

He felt disgusted, not because of Jimin, but because of the sensation than lingered on his skin. It was like he still could feel the touches, even though it lasted for less than a second. Taehyung didn’t know what to do to stop it, and he felt bad for rejecting Jimin’s actions in such an aggressive way.

Oh shit, Jimin. 

Shame and sadness replaced the disgust once Taehyung realized he had just run away from his boyfriend. Maybe Jimin thought he felt disgusted by him? The last thing Taehyung wanted was for Jimin to think that Taehyung didn’t like him. He needed to talk to Jimin before his boyfriend could get the wrong idea. He loved Jimin, he just didn’t love… that kind of action. He knew Jimin would understand.

But what if he doesn’t understand?  

Of course he will. He loves you. 

He loves sex too, though. You can’t give him that.

Can’t you?

The thought had actually passed through his head once or twice. Maybe, if he got used to that kind of stuff, Jimin wouldn’t need to leave him, right? He had looked it up on the internet, and he found threads and threads of discussions about how some ace people were able to ignore the repulsion so their partners could have some fun. 

Isn’t that the least Jimin deserves? 

Yes, it is. 

Would Jimin be happy if he knew you were forcing yourself? 

Taehyung splashed some cold water on his face. He didn’t want to know the answer. 

After Taehyung got back from the bathroom, he found Jimin asleep on the couch. He checked his phone, noticing that he had spent almost an hour inside. 

You’re only giving him problems. 

Shut up. 

He just sighed, before moving Jimin to the bed and hugging him. He felt his boyfriend shift, getting closer to Taehyung.

After that day, Jimin never tried anything with Taehyung again. Sure, they still kissed, but he never tried to go further than that. It was a relief, but he couldn’t understand why Jimin behaved as if nothing had happened that night. 

It was driving Taehyung nuts. 

“Baby?” Taehyung snapped out of his thoughts, again. He was back into the living room, it was still too early (judging by the lack of light, it was at least 3 am), and his boyfriend was calling for him. 

“Did I wake you up?”Jimin shook his head, approaching the couch. He wrapped his arms around Taehyung’s neck, kissing the top of his head. 

“Why are you here? It’s 3:23 in the morning.” Oh, so I was right.

“I was thirsty and wanted some water.” It wasn’t a lie. Taehyung was thirsty when he woke up. Jimin only hummed, before singing some lullaby Tae couldn’t remember the name of. 

Jimin’s voice was so beautiful. 

“Let’s go back to sleep, baby.” Jimin started walking towards his (their) bedroom, holding Taehyung’s hand. Jimin tucked him in, kissing his forehead before laying beside and hugging him. Jimin was still singing, and Taehyung just allowed himself to enjoy the moment. 

After a couple of minutes, Jimin stopped. But Taehyung still couldn’t sleep. 

“Jimin?” Asked Taehyung. 

“Shhhh. We need to sleep, baby. We have to go to work tomorrow.” Jimin hid his face in the space between Taehyung’s neck and shoulder. “We can talk after school.” 

He just whispered a small ok before closing his eyes, the feeling of Jimin’s respiration somehow soothing him to sleep. 

✩✩✩

They didn’t talk the next day. 

Actually, Taehyung and Jimin barely got time to talk the following week. 

One of the math teachers had gone into labor prematurely, only sixth months into the pregnancy, which meant the school needed someone to take over her classes way before they were expecting to. It meant they didn’t have the time to interview and get another teacher, and it meant the other math teachers would need to take over some of the classes. And, of course, Jimin was assigned two of them. 

To make things worse, they were around the end of the semester, so now Jimin needed to prepare almost fifty kids he had not known previously for midterms. And it wasn’t even the same kind of math that Jimin usually taught, no. The teacher that left was a pre-calculus teacher. Which meant more work and more time needed to prepare for the class. 

Again, Taehyung was glad he was just an art teacher. 

He had tried to help Jimin the best he could, but it had been years since he had last touched a math book, so his way of support was more an emotional one. Jimin seemed to appreciate it, though, if the smiles he gave Taehyung every time he helped in some way said something.

“I’m so glad we won’t have to go through pregnancy in order to have kids. We can just adopt.” Jimin said one day, making Taehyung drop the book he was reading. 

Did Jimin just...?

“You–You want to have kids with me?”Jimin didn’t even look at him, pen still on the papers. 

“Well, yeah. Someday. You don’t?” There was a bit of insecurity in Jimin’s voice, almost as if he wasn’t sure he should be asking. Taehyung jumped from his seat, moving closer to him.

“Nononono. I would love to! I always wanted to have a lot of kids.” Taehyung smiled. “I used to live on a farm, you know? And the idea of having a big place, with lots of kids running around… I would like to have that someday, and I would love if I could do it with you beside me.” Now Jimin did stop what he was doing, looking at Taehyung. He could see all the love Jimin felt for him reflected in his eyes. 

“I would love that too.” 

✩✩✩

It took Taehyung four and a half months after he had met Jimin to also meet his (and Namjoon’s) friends. It was the birthday of one of them, Jung Hoseok, and he had been invited to the party. That way we can finally meet the guy that has you whipped , Hoseok had said, not minding that Taehyung could perfectly hear him even though it was supposed to be a private phone call.

That didn’t mean Taehyung wasn’t nervous, though. 

“They literally said they want to meet you. There’s nothing to be nervous about,” Jimin reminded him. Namjoon nodded. 

“Yeah. They have been asking about you for a while, so I’m not surprised Hobi called you. This was the perfect opportunity for you to meet them.” 

“But what if-”

“It will only be the seven of us, Tae. And you already know Namjoon and me, so you will only be meeting four new people.”

“One of which is your ex.” Taehyung pointed out. Namjoon turned his head towards Jimin, who did not meet his eyes. 

“You haven’t told him?” The question wasn’t directed at him, it was for Jimin. 

“We haven’t talked about it yet.”

“Jimin-”

“What’s going on?” Asked Taehyung, looking back and forth between the two of them. Jimin mumbled something that he couldn’t catch. “Can you repeat that, Jimin-ah?”

“Three. You’re meeting three of my ex-boyfriends.”

What the fuck?

Taehyung remained silent, so Jimin continued.  

“You’re meeting Jin-hyung, which you already knew was dating Namjoon-hyung and me.” There was a pause. “But Yoongi-hyung and Jungkookie will be there too. They– uh… I got with Yoongi-hyung about six months after the hyungs and I broke up. We stayed together for about two years before he had to move because of his job. It was only last year that he came back. Then, I started dating Jungkookie. He was the one that lasted the longest, I think. We were together during my second year of graduate school and then another two years, but he went to America so we broke up too. He also only came back last year. Like three months before I met you, actually.” 

Taehyung had problems processing everything. 

“What the– are you seriously telling me you got involved with four of your best friends?” He tried not to sound judgy, he really didn’t think any less of Jimin. It's just… That was a lot of information. Plus, the idea of just sleeping with that many people, or just sleeping sexually with someone, made him uncomfortable. He noticed when Jimin tensed up. 

“No,” He said, and Taehyung knew he was on thin ice. Jimin’s voice sounded so… cold, nothing like the tone he usually used with Taehyung. “I actually got involved with all of my friends, I just never dated Hobi-hyung.”

Taehyung didn’t respond to that, didn’t know how without fucking up even more. He saw Namjoon pretending to read something on his phone, even though he clearly was paying attention. A deep silence surrounded them, and Taehyung could feel how heavy the atmosphere was.

They didn’t talk again until they reached the house. Jimin didn’t knock, he just used the password to get inside, followed by Namjoon. Tahyung only had time to close the door when someone came up to them and tackled his boyfriend. 

“Jiminie! You came!” The guy was on top of Jimin, tickling him. Jimin was laughing hysterically, trying to escape. It isn’t really nice to tackle someone’s boyfriend , he thought. Taehyung didn’t know if he should have said something about it. 

“Ho-Hobi hyung, please. Get off!” The guy, which Taehyung guessed was the one who invited him, stopped tickling Jimin, kissing his face instead. “Hyung!”

Yeah, Taehyung should definitely have said something. 

“Yah! Don’t yell, you brat.” Another man, who Taehyung actually recognized as Kim Seokjin, appeared from nowhere. He hugged Namjoon, kissing him on the cheek, before helping Jimin and Hobi (could he call him Hobi? Or should he call him Hoseok-ssi? He didn’t know the guy, after all) to get back on their feet. 

Taehyung coughed, feeling left out. 

“Oh, Taehyung. It’s been a long time since I last saw you.” Seokjin smiled at him, going for a hug too. 

“Yeah… It’s been a while.” Taehyung wasn’t sure why he felt so awkward, especially with Seokjin-hyung, since he actually knew him. Hoseok (Hobi?) approached him. Taehyung liked his smile, appreciating the heart-shape of his mouth. 

“Jiminie has said a lot about you! We’re so happy to finally meet you.” Taehyung smiled, nodding. 

“He talked a lot about all of you too. Thank you for inviting me.” Hoseok just laughed.

“Nonsense, any boyfriend of Jiminie is part of our family.” Taehyung wanted to point out how most of Jimin’s ex-boyfriends were already part of the group beforehand, but he didn’t want to anger his boyfriend more than he already had, so he just nodded. Jimin tapped his shoulder, capturing his attention. 

“Come with me, we need to find Yoongi-hyung and Jungkookie so you can meet them too.” Jimin didn’t look Taehyung in the eyes, looking at his phone instead before walking to some other room, Taehyung followed behind him. 

Jimin didn’t grab his hand. They always held hands.  

Once they were in the kitchen, Taehyung saw two other people there, talking. They both looked at them once they entered the room, and Taehyung felt goosebumps, tension filling his body. 

So, he was about to meet the ex-boyfriends. 

Jimin immediately hugged them both, obviously happy to see them. They engaged in a small conversion, leaving Taehyung standing behind Jimin, just watching them. He tried not to listen to the conversation, so he focused instead on their physical behavior. 

One of them, the shorter one, was holding Jimin’s hand like it was nothing out of the ordinary, meanwhile, the taller one had an arm on Jimin’s waist. If Taehyung didn’t know better, he would be uncomfortable with the picture of his boyfriend so close and intimate with two of his ex-boyfriends. But they also were Jimin’s friends and Jimin was always like that with his friends, so Taehyung wasn’t uncomfortable. 

Not at all.

Taehyung moved his finger. His hands were so cold. 

It was only five minutes later that Jimin looked at him. 

“So, this is Taehyung.” He said, moving so Taehyung had space to join their own group. 

“Your actual boyfriend.” The taller one said, but his tone was off. Taehyung didn’t know what to make of it. 

“Yes. My boyfriend. Tae, these are Yoongi-hyung,” he pointed at the guy he was holding hands with, “and Jungkookie.”

“Nice to meet you,” said Yoongi, looking at him without much emotion. 

“JIMIN! Can you come for a second?” That was Namjoon’s voice. What the fuck. Why was his cousin calling for Jimin when he knew Taehyung was with the exes? 

“I’m coming!”  Jimin separated from his ex-boyfriends, before going to wherever the voice came from. He didn’t spare Taehyung a look. Once he left, the room plunged into silence. Taehyung could feel the stares, like he was some anomaly in the room. 

“So, any reason why Jimin was so upset?” Yoongi asked, going up to the freezer. He took two beer cans, passing one to Jungkook before opening the other for himself. 

Taehyung didn’t want to explain to them the exact reason, so he just shrugged. He had the feeling that if they knew he had accidentally slut-shamed his boyfriend they would kick his ass, and it probably wouldn’t be in a metaphorical way. 

“We had a little discussion before we got here, but it was just a misunderstanding. I was planning on talking after we went home, so don’t worry.”  

Jungkook just huffed, clearly not believing his excuse. “It doesn’t seem like a little thing to me. We have known Jimin for far longer than you, Taehyung-ssi, we know how he looks when he’s really mad. If you don’t want to tell us, fine. But figure out your shit before you end up hurting him.” He walked past Taehyung, bumping into his side. “We won’t put up with your fuck-ups if they hurt Jiminie.” 

Yoongi followed him, leaving Taehyung alone with his thoughts. 

✩✩✩

Taehyung didn’t get a hold of Jimin that night. 

✩✩✩

“I’m sorry.” 

Jimin looked up from the papers he was grading. Taehyung was in his doorway, holding a small, yellow plushie. Even though he knew Jimin probably wanted to coo at how cute it looked –-if his eyes softening for a quick second said anything— he still maintained a blank face.

“Lock the door behind you. I know that school is over, but I don’t want any students walking in here while we’re talking.” Taehyung did so, before walking to Jimin’s desk and leaving the plushie there. Then, he sat on one of the student’s desks. 

“I’m sorry,” Taehyung repeated. 

“I know you are.” 

“I didn’t mean for it to sound like that. I don’t really care that you slept with them, believe me. It’s just–” Taehyung made gestures with his hands, trying to find the right words to express himself. “It was just the idea of it —of sex—  that bothered me.” 

He felt his face heating up, highly uncomfortable. This wasn’t the way he wanted to talk about sex with Jimin. Actually, he wanted to avoid the conversation altogether.

But, for that, he needed to get his boyfriend back. 

He looked at the floor, playing with the rings on his fingers. “I swear I would never judge you based on that , Jimin. I– I love you so much, that’s the last thing I care about. But sex? That’s not something I know how to deal with it. I just don’t. At all. It irks me too much, to put it in some way. And– I understand if you don’t, well, if you don’t want to be together anymore. It’s ok. I know that for you sex is impor–” Taehyung never got to finish his babbling, for Jimin went where he was and wrapped his arms around him. Only then Taehyung was able to take a deep breath, realizing he hadn’t stopped and taken a breath the whole time he was talking. 

“Tae, calm down, please.” Jimin put his jaw on top of Taehyung’s head, caressing his back. Taehyung felt tears coming down his cheeks, and he sobbed.

“I’m so sorry.” 

“There’s nothing to be sorry for, baby. If anything, I am the one who needs to apologize. I misunderstood your reaction and didn’t let you explain it.” Taehyung felt Jimin moving his head so it was hidden against his chest, kissing the top of his head. “I’m so sorry, baby.” 

They stayed like that, just murmuring apologies to comfort each other. Slowly, Taehyung stopped crying, but he didn't move from his position, enjoying the contact with Jimin. 

Oh, how he had missed his touch. 

“We can talk about what you told me later, baby. But for now, what do you think about going for some ice cream?” 

“Can we eat it at home?” asked Taehyung. Jimin smiled at him, rubbing his cheek.

“Let’s do that.” 

✩✩✩

“So… where do you want to start?” 

Taehyung looked at Jimin, his mouth full of ice cream. “Can’t we just forget what I said?” He was pouting. He wanted to continue avoiding the problem, even though it was a lost cause at that point. 

Jimin smiled at him, before taking Taehyung’s ice cream and putting it on the table in front of them. Taehyung was going to protest, but then Jimin grabbed his torso and pulled him onto his lap, hugging him. 

“I won’t, Taehyung. This is something important, I don’t want to hurt you just because I don’t know what your boundaries are. I need you to be completely honest with me right now.” 

Objectively, and based on Jimin’s reaction, Taehyung knew he didn’t have to worry anymore. But that didn’t make the whole situation easier to talk about. He wished he could send himself into the future, skipping the conversation, and just know already what Jimin was going to do. 

Of course, life doesn't work that way. 

Taehyung sighed. “Fine, let’s have it your way then. Just… gimme a second to try and organize my thoughts, ok?” 

Jimin nodded. “You can take all the time you want, baby.”

Taehyung wasn’t going to lie. To have Jimin being so… sweet and tender when handling this whole situation warmed his heart, especially after not being able to enjoy this kind of attention for so long. 

He was so in love. 

He forced himself to focus on the current conversation. Where should he begin? The moment he figured it out? The first time he had experienced something sexual and he didn’t like it? His past experiences on telling people how he identified himself? 

Did Jimin even know what ace meant? 

“How much do you know about asexuality?” He asked, looking down to where Jimin’s eyes were. 

“Well, I know it applies to people who lack sexual attraction.” 

Taehyung hummed. “I guess that would be the basic definition, but there’s a lot more to it. There’s a whole spectrum and, of course, everyone defines it according to what it means to them. For me, it’s not only that I don’t care about sex. It makes me feel disgusted when it involves me. I don’t really care about it if it involves other people, but I don’t like to think about it. Sex is just… A no-no for me.” Taehyung paused. “That’s why I reacted that way. It wasn’t because you were sleeping with someone else that I was bothered, it was me thinking about what it involved that made it uncomfortable. Do you know what I mean?” Taehyung wasn’t sure if he was explaining it correctly, so he needed to see if Jimin got what he was trying to say. 

“I think so?” Was that an answer or a question? He raised his eyebrows, waiting for Jimin to elaborate. “What you said is basically that it didn’t bother you that I had sex with my friends, but you didn’t like having to think about the sexual part of it, right?” 

Taehyung nodded. “I know this wasn’t what you signed up for when we got in this relationship, but... I guess that’s what I have to offer.” Immediately after he said those words, he felt Jimin’s grip grow stronger around him. Then, Jimin cupped Taehyung’s face with his hands. 

“Tae, listen to me,” he whispered, “what you just told me, and whatever you are going to tell me later, does not change what I feel for you, ok? I loved you before knowing this, but you haven’t changed. What changed was my knowledge about you. You still are the beautiful man I fell in love with.” He had small tears in his eyes, probably a result of the rather emotional moment they were having. Taehyung presumed he was in a similar state. “I don’t need sex to love you, Taehyung. The only thing I need is for you to be with me.” 

“Jimin-ah…” 

“Never, ever , doubt that. Promise me that you will always remember that I love you for who you are as a whole.”  

“I won’t,” Taehyung said. “I swear that I will never doubt your love for me, Jimin-ah.” 

Sometimes we promise things we can’t guarantee. 

✩✩✩

After that rather sentimental moment, Taehyung had suggested they should get takeout since it was getting late and they needed to eat something. They were both sitting on the couch, a bunch of food on the table in front of them. 

“You never told me what you’re ok with?” Jimin pointed out. Taehyung hummed. He hadn’t meant to avoid answering per se, it was just that..

“I’m not really sure, to be honest,” He admitted. 

“What do you mean you aren’t sure?” 

Taehyung looked at his boyfriend, pouting. “Well, usually as soon as I tell my partners that I don’t like sex they either break up with me or they tell me that they can ‘make me like it’, which ends up with me breaking up with them anyway.” Taehyung shrugged. “I like kissing, you already know that. And I like slow make outs, just… without tongue.”

“Is that why you ran to the bathroom that one time?” asked Jimin, frowning. Taehyung nodded. “Shit. I’m sorry, Tae. I didn’t mean–” 

“You didn’t know, it’s ok. Really.” Taehyung smiled. “But now that you mention it, I don’t really like, uh, sexual touching? I love when you caress me, and cuddles, but that day, well…” 

Jimin looked pained, and his eyes were starting to fill with tears. “I’m so sorry I did that without asking.”

“And I’m sorry I never told you this before.” 

“But you didn’t need to, I should have asked if you were ok with it.”

“You have been nothing but the best boyfriend, Jimin. It’s ok.” Taehyung put on his best smile. “We’ll figure it out together.” 

Jimin smiled, but the tears were still there. “I know, but I still feel bad.”

“Shhh. It doesn’t matter. Now, what else should you know?” Taehyung tried to think of anything that might be important, but he couldn’t remember anything at the moment. Jimin didn’t suggest anything either.  He sighed. So much for actually talking. “I guess we’ll have to wait and learn.” 

✩✩✩

The first opportunity for them to learn happened over three weeks later. It was a lazy Sunday, and they had watched movies until late into the night the day before, so when Taehyung woke up at seven in the morning he wished for anything but to open his eyes. He whined, pulling his pillow over his head. It was way too early to be awake. 

Taehyung started drifting to the land of dreams again when Jimin moved closer to him, hugging him as if he was an octopus. Usually, Taehyung wouldn’t mind that gesture. But there was something poking his lower back and Taehyung didn’t know what to do about it. Without even wanting to, he started to panic.

WhatTheFuckWhatTheFuckWhatTheFuck.

Calm down, Taehyung. It is just a morning boner, even you get those from time to time. Just get away from him and you both can laugh about the situation later, or just ignore it. 

He tried to untangle himself from his boyfriend, but as soon as he moved, Jimin’s grip got stronger. Theoretically, Taehyung could still escape, but it would probably wake Jimin up and he didn’t want to do that. 

Jimin mumbled something Taehyung didn’t understand, some sleepy nonsense, and then moaned. 

Oh , Taehyung thought. Jimin was having one of those dreams. 

Well, what did you expect? How long has it been since he slept with someone? He has needs too. 

Taehyung really hated when the voice in his head made him feel bad about his relationship with Jimin. 

Jimin started moving again, panicking Taehyung. He rapidly got away from him, falling off the bed in the process. He hit the floor with force, and he saw his boyfriend waking up immediately, probably scared by the sound of Taehyung’s body hitting the floor. 

Well, so much for not waking your boyfriend up, uh? 

“Tae? Are you ok?” Jimin’s voice was raspy, and his eyes were slightly swollen. 

“Yeah, I just– Fell.” He got up from the floor, sitting on the bed. He tried to avoid any eye contact with Jimin, his cheeks heating up. If Jimin noticed it, he didn’t say anything. He smiled softly at Taehyung. “I don’t think I hurt myself, but– I probably won’t be able to go back to sleep...”

“Oh, baby. Wanna come to bed, or do you want to eat something? I can make whatever you want.” He got closer to Taehyung, kissing his head, before getting out of bed. “I’ll spoil you, but let me just brush my teeth first.”

Jimin left before he could answer anything, leaving Taehyung alone with his thoughts. 

I love him so much… 

But am I enough?

✩✩✩

In Taehyung’s opinion, the Internet had all the answers in the world, so while he watched Jimin cooking some pancakes he decided to try and find some solution to his problem. 

Google: what to do when your boyfriend wants sex but you dont

Quora: What should I do if my boyfriend wants to have sex but I don't…

EliteDaily: What To Do If Your Partner Wants To Have Sex, But You're…

CollageCenter: My Boyfriend Wants To Have Sex And I Don't Think I'm Ready…

No, none of those really helped him. He tried again. 

Google: how to have a relationship when one is asexual and the other isnt 

EverydayFeminism: You Found Out Your Partner's Asexual – Now What? 5 tips…

HuffingtonPost: How To Make A Relationship Work If Your Partner Is Asexual ...

Healthline: What Does It Mean to Be Asexual? 18 Things You Should Know...

These links would probably help Jimin more than me , Taehyung thought, chuckling. Maybe he should send those to his boyfriend later. 

Google: i am asexual and dating a sexually active person, what do i do

He scrolled down the links, noticing how most of them weren’t what he was looking for. He lurked for a bit, but all of them were either saying that his boyfriend should understand that he didn’t want sex —which wasn’t useful, considering that Jimin already did that— or were saying that he should ‘get over it’ and have sex anyways —which, ew, gross. He continued trying to find something, anything, that was useful for him when something caught his attention. 

Youtube: How An Open Relationship Saved My Relationship | True Story!

The video started with a person just presenting themselves, talking bits about their life and about what asexuality was. Taehyung didn’t really pay attention to those parts since he didn’t care, so he started skipping random parts. 

“ ... –ut sex was a problem. Then, my partner suggested we could have an open relationship. ”

Now, this was the part Taehyung cared about. 

“ An open relationship, for those who don’t know, is when you and your partner agree that each party might have sexual relations with other people. It’s not the same as a polyamorous relationship, which is when more than two people are dating each other. In open relationships, there is only sex, not feelings. It’s almost like having a friend with benefits, except that you’re also in a romantic relationship with someone else. It is important that all the people involved know what’s going on, so communication is key to these things. That doesn’t mean you have to know every single detail —I chose to not know anything related to who my partner is sleeping with—, but it really helps when you’re with someone who is sexually active but you aren’t. That way the other person can… satisfy their needs and everyone is happy.” 

Taehyung locked his phone. 

In theory, it sounded like a good idea, but could they actually do that? It wasn’t cheating, but… Could Jimin sleep with someone without falling in love with them?

Wasn’t that what his relationship with Hoseok was like before? 

Yeah, that was what Jimin had said. He slept with Hoseok but didn’t date him. It wasn’t the same, of course, but... Maybe it could be done? 

He jumped when he felt a cold hand on his neck, scared. Jimin started laughing. 

“Wow, I thought I had lost you for a second,” he put a plate of pancakes in front of them, two individual plates following, “I’ve been talking to you for at least five minutes, but you were so absorbed in your phone that you just ignored me.”

“Uh…” Taehyung started, completely unhelpful. “I’m sorry, I was just thinking about something.”

“What were you thinking about?” Asked Jimin, taking a huge bite out of one pancake. 

“What do you think of having an open relationship?” 

Jimin choked. 

Taehyung rapidly went for some water, not wanting his boyfriend to actually die. Jimin drank the whole thing, only then being able to talk. 

“C-Can you repeat the question, babe?”

Taehyung gulped. “What do you think of having an open relationship?” 

Jimin closed his eyes for a second, moving his lips like he was talking even though no sound came out. [ That’s what I thought you said]. Good thing Taehyung was good at reading lips. 

“Why are you asking that?” Asked Jimin, finally opening his eyes. He sounded distressed, just like he did when he made a mistake while grading. 

“Well, I was thinking and… I don’t think it’s fair if you don’t get to enjoy something you like just because I don’t.” Jimin opened his mouth, probably to contradict Taehyung, but he didn’t let him. “Think of it as a hobby. You enjoy solving math problems even though I haven’t opened a math book since college. It doesn’t mean that just because I don’t like it you have to stop, you know? You can still enjoy it, just not with me .” 

“Tae, that’s ridiculous. I can’t just go and sleep with someone else when I’m dating you. That’s literally cheating.” 

“It’s not, I’m agreeing for it to happen. It’s just sex, no feelings involved.” Taehyung sighed. This was going to be more difficult than he thought. “I’m not telling you to just go and have another boyfriend, Jimin. I am telling you that you should at least try sleeping with someone. That way your... Sexual needs are satisfied.” Those last three words made him cringe so bad . 

“Do you even know what you’re suggesting?” Jimin exhaled, his hand massaging the bridge of his nose. “Would you be ok with me having sex with someone? For me, sex isn’t just sleeping, Taehyung. I also like kissing, I also like marking. Would you be ok with me just walking in here on a Sunday morning after spending the night with god knows who, having a huge hickey and bite marks, and just act like it was a normal thing?” 

Ok, so maybe Taehyung hadn’t thought about it to that extent, but he wasn’t going to tell Jimin that. He still wanted his boyfriend to at least try it, to have fun, even if it wasn’t with him. 

“Yes, because you will be happy and that’s all I care about.” 

“I can’t believe you right now.” Jimin stood up, leaving his half-eaten pancake on the table, and started walking away. Taehyung followed him. 

“Why can’t you even consider it? You have had fuck buddies before, what is so different about this?” 

“That I wasn’t dating anyone at the time!” 

“It doesn’t matter!” 

“It does matter. I don’t want to fucking hurt you, Taehyung!” 

“You won’t! I’m literally telling you that you should try it!” 

“This is so stupid.”

“For fuck’s sake, Jimin. It isn’t that weird of a concept! If the situation was the opposite, wouldn’t you want me to do stuff I like?!” 

“Well, yeah, but–“  

“There’s no buts.” Taehyung sighed. “Please, Jimin? I can even go with you when you pick someone. I just… I want you to be happy.”

Jimin held Taehyung’s face with his hands, looking directly at his eyes. “I don’t need sex to be happy, Taehyung. Yeah, I do enjoy sex. And yeah, it is important to me. But you are a hundred times more important.” Jimin’s gaze softened. “Are you sure you want me to do this?” Taehyung nodded. “Ok, I will try it ONCE. But if I don’t like it, I won’t do it again, ok?”

Taehyung smiled. “As long as you try it.”

✩✩✩

Getting Jimin someone to hook up with wasn’t difficult at all, just like Taehyung expected. They had gone to a club, enjoying themselves, but without forgetting what their goal was (well, at least one of them hadn’t). At some point Taehyung went for drinks (well, that was his excuse), leaving Jimin alone to dance by himself for a couple of minutes. He was well aware that not a lot of guys would approach Jimin if they were together. By the time he went back, there was a guy already flirting with his boyfriend. 

Taehyung looked at the guy. He wore a top tank that showed off his big, muscled arms, which had black garters around them. His pants were so tight that Taehyung was surprised he could move, with some chains on them. And even though he had jock vibes, his smile was cute. In summary, he looked good. Not as good and beautiful as Jimin, of course, but good. 

He got closer to them, already smiling. 

“...–ould get outta here and find a more private place.” 

“I don’t know, Wonho, I–“

“Hey, can I talk to you?” Asked Taehyung, giving Jimin his drink, and smiling at the guy —Wonho was his name. “I’ll bring him back in a second, don’t worry.” He winked, before grabbing Jimin’s arm and walking to some corner where the music wasn’t as loud. 

“ What are you doing?! ” Jimin hissed, getting out of Tae’s grip. 

“No, what are you doing? You were about to reject big guy over there!” 

“So? I just didn’t want to sleep with him.” 

“Are you sure it’s only that? Or is that you aren’t planning on sleeping with anyone today?” Jimin remained silent, but he was pouting. It was unfair, given that Taehyung was soft for his boyfriend’s pout. He felt how all his anger dissipated in a matter of seconds, being replaced by a (maybe a bit exaggerated) sadness. “You told me you were going to try, Jimin-ah.” 

“But we were having fun…” 

“That’s not what we came here for.” Taehyung massaged the bridge of his nose. “Be honest with me: If it wasn’t because we are together, would you sleep with Wonho?” 

“... Maybe…” He gave Jimin a look, don’t fuck with me right now . “Ok, yeah. I would have.”

“Then what are you waiting for?” 

Taehyung felt slightly bad for being so annoying about this, but he truly believed this was what they needed. It’s for the best , he thought.  

Jimin rolled his eyes, before drinking all his beverage in one go. “I can’t believe you’re making me do this. I hate you so much.” But he was already walking back to where Wonho was waiting for him. Taehyung grinned, following him. He gave Wonho a thumbs up.  

“Have fun fucking my boyfriend!” He yelled. The big guy’s eyes opened in surprise. 

“What the–” 

“Oh, shut up. I’ll explain later.” Jimin grabbed the guy’s wrist and quite literally dragged him to where the exit was. 

The next day, as soon as Jimin walked into Taehyung’s house, he found his boyfriend already waiting for him with breakfast and a huge shit-eating grin. He ignored him, stripping off his clothes and taking some old shirt of Taehyung’s and some shorts. Taehyung could see that Jimin did end up with marks all over his back, as well as a huge hickey on his neck. It didn’t hurt a bit, and he was secretly relieved. He could actually do this.

“So, did you have fun?” He wiggled his eyebrows. 

“I swear to god that if you say ‘I told you so’ I–” before Jimin could finish his sentence, Taehyung started laughing. Jimin just sighed, as if wondering what his life has come to, before moving closer to Taehyung and back-hugging him. 

“I’m glad you had a good night, Jimin-ah.” And Taehyung really meant that. Even though Jimin hadn’t explicitly said it, he could feel that his boyfriend was less tense and stressed. It made him so happy to see him so… Serene.  He felt a kiss on the top of his head. 

“I am glad too.” 

And that’s all that mattered. 

II.

It turns out that Jimin sleeping with other people did not really affect Taehyung’s daily life on a big scale. 

For starters, Jimin did not really sleep with other people often. It was more of a “two or three times per month” thing, which meant he still was able to cuddle his boyfriend while sleeping most of the time. It made sense; Jimin was a busy adult, and he did spend most of his time either working, with his friends, or with Taehyung. I just don’t have the time or energy to go to a club and find someone to sleep with , he said once when Taehyung asked why he didn’t go out as often. At that point, Taehyung knew Jimin had already gotten used to sleeping with other people, so he didn’t have any reason to not believe Jimin’s word. It had been three months since he had started, after all. It was just that he was busy, especially with the finals being only a month and a half away. 

It shouldn’t have surprised Taehyung when Jimin decided that it would be easier to just sleep with people he already knew. Still, he didn’t really see it coming, even though it sounded like logical reasoning.

“It makes things easier,” Jimin had said, looking for his keys. “It’s just Namjoon, after all. And I trust him. I know you don’t like details, but… Sex is better when you’re with someone you trust.” 

Taehyung understood that, but it didn’t make any less weird the fact that his boyfriend was going to fuck his cousin… who also happened to be his boyfriend’s ex-boyfriend. 

“I know that, but…” 

<I think I will never stop loving them both, Taheyung-ah. But I’ve moved on, and so have they>

Jimin stared at him for a couple of seconds, frowning. 

“I can cancel if you want, Taehyung. I’m sure he’ll understand.” Of course Namjoon would understand. He had asked Taehyung six different times if he was truly ok with him having sex with Jimin. 

<I think I will never stop loving them both, Taheyung-ah>

He still could remember what Namjoon had said before, could feel the sadness and nostalgia mingled with the words. 

But he said he had moved on, so there’s no way he could catch feelings, right? 

… right?

Taehyung sighed. “No, don’t. It’s really ok, trust me.” He tried to give Jimin his best smile. “Have fun, Jimin-ah. Say hi to Namjoon for me.” And as Jimin was leaving, Taehyung wondered if a part of himself didn’t leave with him as well.

✩✩✩

Taehyung did not sleep that night.

✩✩✩

It was weird, in Taehyung’s opinion, how Namjoon and Jimin acted as if they weren’t occasionally fucking. 

There was a faculty meeting, just to discuss how the finals would be organized so students were less likely to have more than one test on a single day. Now, Taehyung usually didn’t really care about his finals. It was a high school art class, after all, so he didn’t actually need space during finals week. They were usually completed during classes before the actual week started. He was still required to attend the meetings, though, since he still needed to know when and where he would need to be supervising other exams. But that would be much later, so right now he was discreetly playing with his phone while the physics teacher fought with one of the history teachers for the afternoon spot on the first Monday. He could also see Namjoon and Jimin discussing how they would arrange their day since most of their students didn’t overlap between their classes. They were behaving like any colleague would, professional, but with the ease of someone who is just talking to a friend. 

If it wasn’t because Taehyung knew they had had sex the night before he would have never guessed that Jimin and Namjoon were more than just friends. 

But they /are/ just friends , a voice in his head reminded him.

Are they, though?

Yes. 

It was difficult for Taehyung to remember that. 

The head of the social studies department whistled, capturing everyone’s attention.  

“Since we just need to work on minor details, I think we should all go have lunch and come back later. You’ll have an hour and a half, so make sure you are all here by then. Enjoy!” A couple of people ran out of the door, not wanting to waste even a minute of their free time. Namjoon and Jimin approached him immediately. 

“So, Namjoon and I were talking and I thought that we could eat something at your place? We can order delivery. If we call right now it will probably be ready by the time we get home. What do you think?” Jimin grabbed his hand, swinging their arms while talking. Taehyung smiled. 

His boyfriend was really cute. 

“I love that idea. Can you make the call? I need to finish this level,” Taehyung pouted, while slightly shaking his phone. Jimin just shook his head, laughing. 

“Sure, be right back baby.” After his boyfriend had left the room, Taehyung set his eyes on his phone, ignoring the teachers that had remained in the room. 

Well, he was only actively ignoring Namjoon, not really caring about other teachers. But that was only because he didn’t know what to talk about. It wasn’t like he could go like ‘Hey, how was your night with my boyfriend? Hahaha. By the way, are you going to our uncle’s wedding?’ Yeah, no. Maybe, if he pretended to be focused on his game, Namjoon wouldn’t say anything to him. 

“Taehyung, I know you’re ignoring me.” 

Or maybe not. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. Look, I just upgraded this part.” He shoved his phone in front of Namjoon’s face, who proceeded to push it away. 

“Taehyung–” 

“So, are you going to our uncle’s wedding?” 

“We don’t have an uncle, Tae.”

Ah, right. 

“I was talking about this other uncle. You know, on the other sid–”

“Is it because I slept with Jimin?” 

Taehyung sighed. “Can we not talk about this right now?” 

“I thought you were ok with me sleeping with him...” Namjoon looked concerned, like he was afraid of Taehyung’s words. The last thing I want is that , he thought. 

“I am, but… You’re his ex, hyung. Isn’t it weird to sleep with your ex?” The ‘especially when he’s dating your cousin’ was left unsaid, but Namjoon was smart. He could probably catch it anyways. 

“It was at the beginning, but we– huh… We didn’t pay that much attention to it after the first 10 minutes.” Namjoon’s face turned as red as a strawberry. “That’s not the point, though. I need to know if you have any problem with me and Jimin sleeping together.” 

“I don’t have a problem with it.” 

I have a problem with you two falling in love again. 

“I don’t believe you.” 

“I don’t care, hyung. I’m telling the truth.” Taehyung locked his phone, putting it inside his pocket.

“Can you drop this fake acceptance going on, I know you’re just saying bull–” 

“What’s going on?” Jimin’s voice made both adults jump. When did he come back?

“Nothing,” blurted Taehyung, grabbing Namjoon’s arm and crushing it. Jimin just gave him an unimpressed look. 

“Sure, that’s why you and Namjoon-hyung were fighting. Now, are you two gonna tell me the truth or not?” Taehyung knew Jimin was starting to get impatient. Before either Namjoon or Taehyung could say anything, Jimin’s phone vibrated. He took it out, reading the notification. “Our food was picked up and it’s on its way home. We need to go.”

“Jimin–” 

“Babe–” 

“We’ll talk at home.” Jimin took his bag and exited the room, not sparing a look to either of them. Namjoon and Taehyung followed behind like kicked puppies. 

An upset Jimin was never good news. 

(On the other hand, the last time Jimin had been mad at him, they ended up actually talking about their problems and figuring out their shit, so maybe it wasn’t such a bad situation.)

(Taehyung really should improve the communication part of their relationship.) 

They walked in silence all the way to Taehyung’s apartment. The first thing Jimin did once they entered was point at the couch. 

“Sit down and tell me what was that fight about.” 

“It was nothing,” Taehyung said, but he did as Jimin told him anyways.

“It wasn’t nothing, Taehyung.” Namjoon sighed. “Look, Minnie, I think this is a conversation you should have with Taehyung alone, not with me.” 

“No. After you tell me what’s going on I’ll be the one deciding if this includes you or not.” 

Taehyung snorted. “There’s no-”

“Taehyung is mad at me because we slept together.”

“–thing”  He looked at Namjoon. “What a way of throwing me under the bus, hyung.” 

Well, at least Jimin’s gaze seemed to have softened a bit.

“Is that true, Taetae?” Jimin walked up to him, caressing his hair. It made him feel slightly better, knowing that Jimin wasn’t actually mad, but he really hated to be in this situation. Why couldn’t his life be less dramatic? 

“Well… Kind of.” Taehyung closed his eyes, leaning onto Jimin’s touch. “I’m not mad that you’re sleeping with hyung, or with anyone else for that matter. It’s just… Isn’t sleeping with your ex, like, a bad idea? I’m pretty sure I’ve watched dramas like that. I don’t think I would like the ending of this one.” 

Even though he couldn’t see him, Taehyung was sure Jimin’s look right now was anything but judgemental. 

“Taehyung-ah… You don’t have to worry about that. I’m not dating Namjoon, I’m dating you . I love you.” He felt Jimin’s lips on the top of his head, just before someone knocked at their door. “That must be the food. I’ll be back in five minutes. I want you two to apologize.” Taehyung opened his eyes, just in time to see Jimin smiling at both of them before leaving. There was silence for a couple of seconds. 

It was now or never.

Taehyung turned to his cousin, his best friend. 

<I think I will never stop loving them both, Taheyung-ah>

“Hyung, do you love him?” 

Namjoon sighed. “Of course I do, Tae. It’s impossible not to. But I would never try to get back with him regardless of his relationship with you.” He stood up, putting his hand on Taehyung’s shoulder. “Are we ok?” 

It wasn’t for nothing that Taehyung had spent all his life with Namjoon. He could see how the situation was affecting him. His cousin was scared of losing him, of damaging the relationship they have always had. It was stupid, in Taehyung’s opinion, since they were family. He couldn’t really just disappear from his life. And even if he could, he would never want a life without Namjoon, no matter what happened between them. Hell, even if Jimin decided to leave him and date Namjoon again he wouldn’t really hate either of them. 

He would rather have Jimin as just a friend than lose two of the most important people in his life.

Taehyung gave him his biggest smile. Maybe he could never know the future, but at least he could control the present. 

“We will always be, hyung. I’m sorry for acting like an asshole.” He got off the couch, hugging him. Namjoon exhaled in relief. 

“I’m sorry for causing so much trouble.” Namjoon was smiling, his dimples showing. “Talk to me next time, ok? I really don’t want to fight with you ever again.” 

“I will. Now, get the plastic plates, I don’t feel like washing dishes today, and we only have an hour left until we have to go back.” Namjoon nodded, and they both started setting the table. Jimin joined them a minute later. Taehyung didn’t know if he had heard them talk, but he figured it didn’t matter. In no time, all of them were busying themselves with the food, enjoying the comfortable silence that surrounded them. 

At some point, Jimin took Taehyung’s hand and kissed it.

Taehyung didn’t miss the longing in Namjoon’s eyes. 

✩✩✩

After spending three weeks either grading papers, having review sessions, watching over other teacher’s finals, or putting grades in the system, Taehyung could see just how stressed his boyfriend was, and that he needed a break. For that reason, he knew what was coming before Jimin had even told him. 

After the last ‘fight’ they had, Taehyung had been more relaxed around Namjoon and Jimin’s agreement. Of course, that irritating voice came back from time to time to fill his mind with negative thoughts, but Taehyung had started to block it by thinking of good moments with Jimin. It worked most of the time, and it made Taehyung’s life more peaceful.

“I’m going to Namjoon’s today, babe. I’ll be back around 9 in the morning.” Jimin smiled at him, eyes full of love. Taehyung wanted nothing else but to kiss those eyes until all the stress disappeared. “Wanna go for some breakfast tomorrow? It can be a date~ We haven’t had one in weeks, and we need to celebrate the end of the school year too.”

It was nice to be back to having a problem-free relationship.

 “Sure, babe. I’m in the mood for pancakes anyway.” Taehyung kissed his boyfriend on the cheek, just a peck. “Have fun!” He ruffled Jimin’s hair, before watching him run out of the apartment. Taehyung walked to the couch, wanting to continue that Netflix drama he had been binge-watching recently.

Since Namjoon and Jimin were the only people Taehyung actually interacted with, he didn’t bother to silence his phone. He knew those two would be busy with each other at least until past midnight, and by then Taehyung was expecting to be sleeping. He sent his boyfriend a short ‘Love you’ before focusing on the tv, covering himself with the soft blanket. He stayed like that for hours, eventually falling asleep on the couch. 

Jimin’s ringtone woke him up that night. 

Taehyung groaned, grabbing his phone without opening his eyes. He was way too sleepy for his brain to actually work, so his body was working on auto-pilot. Somehow, he managed to actually answer the call.

“Jiminie?” His voice was raspy, not having used it in a couple of hours. “Are you ok? What happened?” On the other side, his boyfriend sighed.

“Everything is ok, Taehyung-ah… It’s just– I think we have a problem. Can you come to Namjoon’s place?” Well, that made Taehyung open his eyes. 

What?

“I’ll be there in 10 minutes.” He said, before hanging up. He didn't bother changing his clothes, just taking his keys and putting some shoes on before getting out. Once he arrived at Namjoon’s apartment, he checked the time.

11:24 pm. 

He opened the door, expecting the worst. Maybe someone had gotten injured? 

But they would have called an ambulance instead

Well, maybe they found a dog? 

A dog? Really? Jimin didn’t sound exactly happy during the call.

Maybe Jimin had decided to finally date Nam– 

Before his brain could complete the thought, he froze. “What the fuck?”

“Good to see you again, Taehyungie.”

In front of him, for some reason, was Jung Hoseok. 

Taehyung’s brain couldn’t process what he was seeing. 

“What the fuck?” 

Jimin sighed. “Hobi-hyung decided to pay Namjoon a visit” He explained. He was wearing a shirt that Taehyung knew for a fact belonged to Namjoon, and Taehyung could see purple marks on his thighs. “He walked in on us kissing in the kitchen and started yelling at us. He thought I was cheating on you.”

“Which is understandable, considering you haven’t even explained what’s going on,” Hoseok said, looking at both Namjoon and Jimin. It was weird, Taehyung thought, seeing him without a smile on his face. He looked upset, and honestly, it intimidated the fuck out of Taehyung. 

“We told him that we couldn’t explain it without you since you’re involved,” Jimin continued, “so Namjoon told me to call you.”

“We can’t really talk about what’s going on without talking about, well, you know...” Namjoon looked slightly embarrassed, clearly not wanting to have this conversation. Taehyung could relate. 

He sighed, massaging the bridge of his nose. What a mess , he thought. He looked at Hoseok, who was staring with a blank face. 

Here goes nothing, I guess.

“Jimin isn’t cheating on me, Hoseok-ssi.” 

Hoseok arched his eyebrow. “Then what’s going on here? I’m not stupid, I know Namjoon and Jimin are fucking.” He looked and Namjoon. “I’m guessing you aren’t dating your own cousin, so did you get back with Jimin and didn’t tell us?” 

“I’m not dating Jimin,” stated Namjoon, exasperated. 

“But you’re fucking him.”

“I told Jimin to do that,” explained Taehyung. He could feel the beginning of a headache. “Well, I didn’t tell him to specifically fuck Namjoon, but I wanted him to sleep with people. He didn’t even want to do it at the beginning, I had to practically beg him.” 

“Is this some kink you have?” Hoseok looked confused, but he didn’t seem upset anymore. Taehyung, on the other hand, was getting more and more uncomfortable. He really didn’t want to have this conversation.

“Hyung, stop. There’s an easier way to solve this.” Jimin interrupted. He walked up to where Taehyung was standing, grabbing his hand and dragging him to the closest seat. He made Taehyung sit on his lap, and cupped his face with both his hands. His voice softened. “Baby, do you want me to tell Hobi-hyung about why I was with Namjoon? I know you don’t like talking about it, and I won’t say a thing if you don’t want me to, but this conversation could be over faster if we just tell him. I promise you he will understand.” 

Taehyung exhaled, mentally thanking his boyfriend. He just nodded, closing his eyes. He didn’t want to see Hoseok’s face at the moment, he was too overwhelmed already. 

Jimin hugged him, resting his chin on Taehyung’s shoulder. He started caressing his back, too.

“Hyung, I’m gonna be extremely blunt right now so we can move on.” Taehyung held his breath, his body tensing. “Tae is asexual, and he’s also sex-repulsed. So please, avoid talking about kinks and anything sex-related around him. Despite that, he knows I do like sex, so he told me that we could have an open relationship. That’s why I’m sleeping with Namjoon-hyung.”

Taehyung expected some laughter, maybe even a mean remark. Hoseok obviously was going to think he was weird. It didn’t matter how much of a good person he was, Taehyung was weird , so of course even someone as nice as Hoseok would– 

“Oh thank god, I seriously thought you were cheating or something. I’m so relieved.”

Wait, what?  

Taehyung turned around so fast that, if it wasn’t because Jimin was holding him, he would have ended up on the floor. His mouth was open, and he was staring at Hoseok in shock. 

“You’re what?” He asked, full of disbelief. It couldn’t be that easy, could it? “You… You don’t think I’m weird?”

Hoseok seemed to notice his surprise, for he just smiled at him. “Taehyung, I’m literally aromantic, why would I think that? I am, like, the last person who could judge you in the world.”

Taehyung blinked. 

Well, he didn’t see this one coming. 

Namjoon coughed, capturing everyone’s attention. 

“So… How about we talk about this over dinner?” 

✩✩✩

For all the drama that had happened before, by the time they found a place that was open at midnight, the atmosphere was extremely relaxed and everyone behaved like they normally would. Hoseok seemed to easily make the conversation flow without any awkward moments, and right at the moment, he was asking Taehyung more about his job as an art teacher. Overall, it was a nice experience, and it helped him to get to know more about Hoseok 

There was nothing that could rupture this new atmosphere , he thought.

“By the way, Tae, do you mind if I sleep with Jimin too?” 

Taehyung choked on nothing. 

You jinxed yourself, dumbass.

Jimin hit his back gently, trying to help. “Are you ok, babe?”

“Y-yeah.” He cleared his throat, before looking at Hoseok. “What did you say, hyung?” 

“I was asking if I could sleep with Jiminie too. I don’t know if he told you, but we were kind of friends with benefits back in college, so I thought ‘hey, why not ask if I could join the fun?’” Hoseok winked at him. “You don’t have to accept if you don’t want to, of course, but I figured I wouldn’t lose anything by asking.” 

Jimin raised one eyebrow. “I mean, I wouldn’t really mind, but I’m surprised you’re asking.”

Hoseok just smiled. “The more the merrier, am I right?” 

Maybe it was the casual tone in his voice, but Taehyung couldn’t really think of any reason to say no. 

I mean, it is not like he’s gonna date Jimin at the end. And this way Jimin would be able to sleep with someone else besides Namjoon.

“Yeah,” Taehyung said, nodding. “The more the merrier.”

He didn’t know that phrase would bite him in the ass later. 

✩✩✩

Taehyung figured that, since it was extremely unlikely that the rest of Jimin’s friends would think less of him for being asexual, he might as well tell the rest about it. Or, more specifically, he told Hoseok to casually mention it to the others so Taehyung wouldn’t need to do it himself. Unlike  Namjoon and Jimin, who usually didn’t let him get away with avoiding stuff, Hoseok just gave him a thumbs up and nodded, not questioning anything. 

He felt like Hoseok actually understood his situation better, even though it wasn’t the same. Still, Taehyung found himself actually forming a friendship with the guy. They started going out more, and Taehyung was glad he had someone like him in his life. 

 Well, most of the time, anyway. 

The only problem Taehyung actually had with Hoseok was that he always insisted that he should spend more time with the whole group. After the party a couple of months ago, Taehyung had done everything he could to avoid hanging out with the others. It wasn’t that he didn’t like them, per se, it was just that he didn’t know what to do when he was around Yoongi and Jungkook. 

So, instead of fixing that, he just avoided them altogether. 

He wasn’t stupid, he knew the pair didn’t like him at all. And he was sure everyone was aware. Jimin usually avoided talking about them after they would hang out. He would always say that Seokjin-hyung and Hobi-hyung missed him, but his boyfriend never mentioned the other two. 

It was fine, really. Taehyung understood. 

Hoseok didn’t. 

“I’m sure if you get to actually talk to them they would love you,” he had said one day, while they were at his studio after Hoseok had finished one of his dance classes. It wasn’t uncommon for him to spend some time there, mostly on the days Jimin and Namjoon were hanging out and Taehyung didn’t want to tag along, but it still didn’t happen often enough for him to be completely familiar with the place. 

“Hyung, I know you want to believe that, but they hate me. There’s no way that’s happening.” 

Hoseok shook his head. “No, they don’t. I would know if they did. They’re just… suspicious of you. They think you’re going to hurt Jiminie.”

Taehyung took offense on that. “I would never do that, I love him.” 

Hoseok smiled at him, but it barely reached his eyes. “I know, Taehyung. And they know that. But sometimes we hurt the people we love the most, even if we don’t mean to do it.”

✩✩✩

“So… you’re going to go see Seokjin-hyung again?” Taehyung saw his boyfriend flinching. 

It was relatively recent, for his boyfriend to not only sleep with Namjoon, but with Seokjin too. Taehyung wasn’t sure how to feel about it. 

That’s two exes already.

“I know I didn’t ask you before agreeing, but I figured you would be ok with it? I mean, since you were ok with the others…” Jimin ran his hand through his hair. He was nervous. “And we’re not going to be alone this time. We, uh, Namjoon-hyung is going to join us too.” 

Taehyung just stared at him without blinking. There was silence for a couple of seconds, in which Taehyung didn’t know what to say to that. 

Then he realized there wasn’t a lot he could say anyway. 

He shrugged, turning to his phone and opening one of the games he had. “Ok, have fun then. I guess I’ll see you tomorrow.” 

Jimin looked at him, but Taehyung was already playing and ignoring him. He heard his boyfriend sighing, then steps, and the door closing. As soon as he knew Jimin wasn’t in any surrounding area, Taehyung locked his phone and lay down on the couch, staring at the ceiling.

<I think I will never stop loving them both, Taheyung-ah>

The tears started rolling down before Taehyung could even notice them. 

✩✩✩

The next day, Jimin didn’t go straight to Taehyung’s apartment. He went to his own, and it wasn’t until the night that Taehyung decided to go visit him. Once Jimin had opened the door, Taehyung had a hard time not frowning. 

His boyfriend looked like he hadn’t been able to sleep for days, but not in the same way he usually got tired after having a night with someone else. His eyes were puffy, like he had been crying, and the way he carried himself just screamed tiredness. He looked exhausted.

But Taehyung didn’t look any different, so he decided not to comment on it. 

Neither of them mentioned what had happened the night before. Actually, neither of them spoke at all that night. Once Taehyung entered the apartment, both of them just walked to the bedroom and cuddled all night. 

It was comforting, but as Taehyung’s eyes felt too heavy to keep open and his mind starting shutting down, he couldn’t help but think there was something extremely wrong. 

If only they had talked about it. 

✩✩✩

The good thing about starting the school year was that Taehyung could put his free time into actually doing something instead of drowning himself in his own thoughts. 

The last couple of weeks of their vacation was full of tension between him and Jimin. Of course, after some days (well, more like until after the second week of school), Taehyung had managed to ignore it most of the time. But it would always come back to him, mostly on the nights he couldn’t manage to fall asleep. And it reflected on his behavior towards his boyfriend. 

It was weird. For months, his relationship with Jimin had been mostly perfect. They had gone on dates all the time, they hugged every five minutes, and they would spend hours and hours just talking, happy just to listen to the other’s voice. But since That Night (because Taehyung needed a name for it), it seemed like their love was just… damaged in some way. And it hurt a lot since he still loved Jimin, but… Taehyung’s own mind seemed to be against them. 

He would probably be better with Namjoon and Seokjin anyways , he thought, the words sounding as bitter as he felt. That way he could have two amazing boyfriends that actually could make him happy. 

Logically, he knew Jimin still loved him. He could see it in his eyes when they talked, and he could feel it in the way Jimin always made sure he was ok. But he could also see something else, something that was tormenting him, something that Jimin was hiding from him. 

He just had no idea what it was. 

The sound of his phone was what snapped him out of his thoughts. He grabbed it, looking at the screen.

[ Reminder: Jiminie and I’s 1st anniversary in three weeks]

Oh shit. 

Taehyung groaned, throwing his phone away. Of course their anniversary was coming during the moment of the lowest point of their relationship. How were they supposed to celebrate when there was something wrong? Should Taehyung ignore it? Or should he just cancel the celebration? What was Jimin planning?

This is going to be so awkward. 

Well, but you need to deal with it anyway, so you better get your ass out of here and go to talk to Jimin for god’s sake. 

With a sigh, Taehyung decided that yes, he did need to talk to his boyfriend.

The way to Jimin’s apartment never felt so long. It was like something was trying to stop him, or to at least delay him. Taehyung laughed at himself. It was probably just his mood that made his perception of time so fucked up, the universe wasn’t conspiring to make him have to wait longer to see his boyfriend. 

Right?

Right.

By the time he was in front of Jimin’s door, he realized he didn’t even know if Jimin was there. 

Next time, you should tell your boyfriend you’re going to see him. 

Come one, what’s the worst thing that can happen? 

What if he’s with someone? 

He would have told me. 

He opened the door. 

The apartment was as always, maybe a little messier than usual, but it wasn’t enough for him to actually be worried. Actually, the only thing that looked out of place was a jacket thrown in the middle of the living room. Taehyung went to grab it, curious. 

He had never seen Jimin with a black leather jacket, but considering it was too small for him to even consider it to belong to Namjoon or Seokjin, he supposed it had to be Jimin’s. 

I wonder when he bought this, Makes sense though, it’s about to get colder.

He walked to Jimin’s room, and that's when he heard the sound of the shower. The bed was even messier, and he casually wondered if Jimin had just woken up from a nap. It was the afternoon, after all. 

“Jimin! I’m here,” he yelled, leaving the jacket on the bed. The sound of water stopped, and two minutes later he saw his boyfriend appear in the room. 

“Tae, I didn’t–” he blinked. “I wasn’t expecting you today.” 

Taehyung stared at him. Jimin looked surprised, which was understandable, but he also looked slightly nervous. 

Maybe you scared him. He clearly wasn’t expecting to hear someone calling him while he was in the shower. 

He smiled. “Well, it’s been a while since I came here. I thought that, maybe, we could watch a movie? I think we left The Notebook here last time.” 

“We did, uh. I think it’s on the shelf near the tv. You should look for it while I get dressed.” Jimin moved to his right, making way for him to get out of the room. Taehyung nodded. 

“Sure. But be quick, please, you’re the one who knows how to work the DVD player.” Taehyung walked out, trying to ignore the weird feeling he had after seeing his boyfriend so nervous. 

Wait. Forgot to tell him about the jacket.

He turned around, going back to Jimin’s room. He stopped on the door, though. 

His boyfriend was full of marks, all red and pink-ish. They seemed recent, maybe a couple of hours old. They were especially present near the lower part, almost as if someone was trying to reach Jimin’s as– 

Oh. 

So that’s why he seemed so nervous. 

Taehyung left to the kitchen, glad Jimin hadn’t noticed him in the door. 

He was also glad he hadn’t visited his boyfriend an hour before he did. 

Is the first time I have seen him like that. Maybe he was trying something with his hyungs? 

Despite trying to ignore any kind of signal that reminded him that his boyfriend was sleeping with someone, he still liked to stare at Jimin a lot, so eventually, he started to pick up on some of his hyung’s tendencies. With Namjoon, Jimin always ended up with hickeys on the neck. With Seokjin, Jimin always ended up with his lips especially swollen. With Hoseok, Jimin ended up with nail marks. 

But none of them usually liked to bite Jimin’s ass. 

Stop thinking about that! It doesn’t matter, they probably just wanted something different. 

Taehyung softly slapped himself. Yeah, he had to focus on finding the movie. 

Fuck the movie.. 

Jimin soon appeared in the living room, smiling at him. “Did you find it?” 

Taehyung shook his head. “No. But it doesn’t matter. Jimin, can we talk?” 

The smile slowly disappeared, being replaced with a frown. “Everything all right?” 

“Yes, I mean, no.” He gulped. “Are we still celebrating our anniversary? Because lately we haven’t really… been together. I feel like I barely see you.”

Jimin bit his lip. “Yeah, of course we are. I’ve just been… busy lately, stressed too. But we are totally celebrating.” He gave him another smile, but it didn’t look real.

Well, there’s nothing weird with this situation at all. 

Shut up, it’s not the moment to start fights. Just change the topic

But– 

CHANGE IT.

“Nice.” Taehyung coughed. “Now, how about we forget the movie and we go cuddle for the rest of the day?” If there was anything Taehyung knew could distract them both, it was cuddles. That was their thing, no matter the problem they had. He walked up to where Jimin was standing, wrapping himself around his boyfriend’s body.

That seemed to make his boyfriend happy. Jimin giggled, kissing Taehyung’s cheek. “If my baby wants cuddles, then cuddles I shall deliver.” 

Taehyung smiled. 

They would be ok.

✩✩✩

He was wrong. 

✩✩✩

After that nice cuddling session, his relationship with Jimin seemed to improve a lot. They were back at being grossly in love together. And sure, maybe Taehyung still hadn’t asked Jimin what was he hiding, but did he really want to know? For all he knew, the answer could just make them drift apart. No way he was letting that happen. 

At least, that’s what he told himself.

Now, Taehyung isn’t an idiot. He knew what he was having with Jimin at the moment was just an illusion. Just them hanging on hopes that were supported by crystal walls. It was pretty, sure, but it was also fragile. He didn’t know how much time they had left until the weight of their problems made the whole structure collapse. 

The first cracks started to appear weeks after their anniversary, three days before winter break. Taehyung was in Jimin’s classroom, slowly making out with his boyfriend. They had locked the door and closed the blinds, even going as far as turning off the lights so no student could possibly see them. It was risky since they were still at school and weren’t supposed to be showing any kind of intimacy, but lately, Jimin seemed to need constant affection and, really, who was Taehyung to say no to some kisses from his boyfriend? 

“Jimin-ah,” he murmured, running his fingers through Jimin’s hair. His boyfriend hummed in acknowledgment, resting his forehead on Taehyung’s shoulder. “Wanna do something tonight?”

Jimin sighed. “I would love to, Tae, but I already said I would go see Seokjin-hyung today. Maybe tomorrow?” 

Even though his boyfriend wasn’t able to see him, Taehyung still raised his eyebrows in surprise. “Today? Since when do you sleep around on weekdays? We still have to come to work tomorrow.” 

“I know, but I don’t think it is that big of a deal, you know? It’s not like he lives in another city. I still can come tomorrow morning on time.” 

Taehyung pouted. “I’m gonna miss you, though.” He wanted Jimin to cancel his dick appointment and stay with him so they could do boyfriends stuff. But he couldn’t ask for it.

How selfish of you, wanting your boyfriend to do what you want instead of what he wants. 

Jimin giggled, kissing his cheek. “I’ll be back before you have the time to miss me.”

I already do, though. 

“I know you will,” Taehyung said, glad Jimin couldn’t see the disappointment on his face. 

Later that day, after Jimin had already left, Taehung decided to do something he hadn’t done in a long time. He took his phone, dialing a number he has known by heart for years. 

Ring… Ring.

“Hello?” 

“...Hyung? Can you come?”

Namjoon sighed. “I’ll be there.” 

✩✩✩

“It’s been a long time since you invited me somewhere without Jimin” Namjoon commented, sitting on the couch.

Taehyung forced a laugh out of his chest, following him. “Yeah, well, sometimes I think you spend more time with him than I do.” Namjoon looked at him with a raised eyebrow, apparently wanting to say something, but Taehyung just changed the topic. “You know what we haven’t done in a long time? We haven’t visited any museums. There’s this new art exhibition in the museum near the pastry shop we used to go to all the time, so I thought, ‘Wow, I should invite Namjoon-hyung to this place.’ I know you will like it, so I already bought the tickets online. We should go right now, though. Or won’t have enough–”

Namjoon put both his hands on Taehyung’s shoulders. “Tae, breathe.” Taehyung did. “Ok. Now, how about you tell me what’s actually going on?” Namjoon took his hands off Taehyung. “Since I do want to go to that museum, and I think you need some fresh air, you can explain it to me while we walk to the place you mentioned. Is that ok?” Taehyung nodded. “Good. Let’s go now.” 

He stood up, getting Taehyung’s things for him, while Taehyung stood near the door like a sim waiting for orders. Namjoon opened the door for them, and they both walked out. The day was nice for a walk, and Taehyung could feel himself relax instantaneously. It was nice. When was the last time I went out with Jimin? Or at all? I can’t remember. At least Namjoon-hyung is with me, he likes silent walks just as much as I do. They remained in silence for a couple of blocks, just enjoying the world around them. 

“So,” Namjoon started, looking at the buildings around them, “what was that in your apartment?”

Taehyung bit his bottom lip. “I just… I wanted some kind of distraction, and we both love museums. It was the perfect opportunity to hang out.” I’m tired of being alone , he added mentally. Namjoon looked at him for a couple of seconds in silence, probably contemplating Taehyung’s answer. He didn’t seem convinced, and Taehyung feared for a second that he would be confronted about it. Then, Namjoon sighed.

“Ok,” he said. 

Taehyung blinked. “Ok?” He asked, dumbfounded. 

Namjoon shrugged his shoulders. “If you want to tell me, you will eventually. If you don’t, well, just don’t. Don’t worry about it.” He smiled, dimples showing. “Now, about that exhibition…” 

The rest of the day was dedicated to admiring art and enjoying each other’s company. By the time he noticed just how late it was, Taehyung felt lighter than he had for a long time, and he couldn’t help but have a perpetual smile on his face. He never noticed how… Exhausted the whole situation with Jimin made him feel until he got a small break from it. 

He tried no to feel terrible for thinking that way. 

They ended up in the pastry shop, ordering some food. Namjoon didn’t start any kind of conversation, but Taehyung felt more at peace with himself, so he thought it was time to talk about how he was feeling. 

He cleared his throat, capturing Namjoon’s attention. 

“So,” he started, “I have a problem. A relationship problem. An I-have-no-idea-what-to-do problem.” He pressed his lips together. “I’m not… happy? Wait, no. Is not that. Well, it is, but-” He groaned, closing his eyes for a couple of seconds. “Hyung, I don’t… I don’t feel like Jimin is spending time with me anymore. Like, he spends so much time with you, Hobi-hyung, and Seokjin-hyung that I can barely see him? He even started going out on weekdays when he never did that before. I… I don’t know what to do anymore.” He could feel how tears accumulated in his eyes. “And I feel guilty because it was me who had the idea. I basically forced him to sleep around, and now that he likes doing it, I want to take that away from him? I’m the worst boyfriend. I– I don’t deserve him, hyung.” 

Taehyung started crying, his face between his hands. He soon felt Namjoon sitting beside him, hugging him. 

“ Shhhh, It’s ok, Tae.” Namjoon caressed his back. “Just let them out. It’s fine.” 

Taehyung sobbed, hiding his face on Namjoon’s shoulder. “I love him so much, hyung. I don’t want to lose him, I don’t want to feel like this.” 

“Have you talked about this with him?” Namjoon asked. Taehyung shook his head. “You need to talk to him. That way you two can… make the best decision for your relationship.” 

“I’m scared,” Taehyung mumbled. Namjoon sighed, separating himself from Taehyung, and using a napkin to dry the tears. 

“I know, but you still have to talk to him.” Namjoon pressed his lips, like he was debating what to say next. Taehyung looked at him, lips trembling. “There’s something I need to tell you, Tae. Something I should have said before.” Taehyung just looked at him, not saying a word. “Remember when Jimin, Seokjin-hyung, and I had that dinner?” Taehyung nodded. “Well, that day, we all talked about a lot of things. One of them was our ex-relationship.” Taehyung felt his body tensing, getting out of Namjoon’s embrace, and staring at him. “We… Hyung and I told him about how we still, well, loved him. He got quiet, Tae, and then he immediately left the place.”

Oh , he thought, that explains why he was so emotional that day. But why hadn’t he said anything?

Maybe it was a quick problem and Jimin thought it didn’t matter. 

But stil...

“Did you solve it when you met the next time?” He asked, frowning slightly. 

He saw how Namjoon’s face changed immediately. His eyes were saying something to Taehyung, but he couldn’t understand what it was. It felt like… A bunch of emotions together, but none of them felt good. Taehyung felt a knot forming inside his stomach, and he just knew he wouldn’t like where this conversation was going. After some hesitation, Namjoon answered. 

“Neither Seokjin-hyung or I have seen him since that day, Tae.” 

✩✩✩

If you asked Taehyung, he would say that he couldn’t remember what happened after Namjoon had revealed that to him. According to his cousin, he had stayed in silence for at least ten minutes before leaving, excusing himself saying that he wanted to go home. Instead, he somehow ended up in front of Jimin’s apartment an hour and a half later, even though the distance was just a couple of blocks away. He stood outside of the complex, just looking at the place, watching people go in and out every so often. A part of Taehyung just wanted to laugh and cry at his own actions, finding the situation ironic. People did say that home is where the heart is and his heart, despite how broken was at the moment, was always with Jimin. 

He saw two guys exiting the building at the same time. One of them wore a black leather jacket. 

He recognized them instantaneously.

Taehyung decided to go inside. 

✩✩✩

Jimin’s apartment looked exactly like always, but the air smelled like sweat and burnt candles. It was as cozy as the last time he remembered, and he could still see the parts of himself that had transferred into the place after more than a year of dating Jimin. 

No matter how much he loved the place, he couldn’t bring himself to smile this time. 

He continued looking around, now walking to Jimin’s bedroom. Jimin was on his bed, sleeping, with his lips swollen and bite marks everywhere. 

Taehyung sat beside him, running his fingers through Jimin’s hair. He looked so peaceful, so innocent, so… 

Beautiful. 

Jimin was a beautiful person, Taehyung knew that since the first time they had met each other. 

He wasn’t sure if he could still consider Jimin a beautiful person on the inside. 

He continued caressing Jimin’s hair, looking at the way Jimin’s chest moved each time he breathed. Jimin’s eyes started to open too, at first showing surprise, then worry. Jimin immediately sat, taking Taehyung’s hand off his hair.

“Tae, are you ok?” He asked. “Why are you crying?” 

Crying? 

Taehyung touched his cheeks, feeling the humid trail of tears. 

Oh… 

Taehyung hadn’t noticed when he started to cry. 

Jimin stared at him, frowning. “Taehyung? What’s wrong, baby? Talk to me.” 

Taehyung couldn’t find a way to talk. It was as if his body was disconnected, just like one of those nightmares he always had. 

He wondered when had his life become one of the nightmares he was so afraid of. 

Jimin looked so distressed. “Taehyung, you’re scaring me” He had started to cry while shaking him rather brusquely. Taehyung just stared.

Why do you care, Jimin-ah? He wanted to ask. Why do you care now? Why didn’t you tell me what happened with Namjoon-hyung and Seokjin-hyung? Why did you lie to me? Why do you never talk to me about your problems? 

Why did you sleep with Yoongi and Jungkook without telling me?

Are you distancing yourself because of sex?

Taehyung blinked. Of course, that was the problem. It always was the problem, from the beginning. He was the problem. 

Taehyung’s hands started to shake. How could he fix everything? How could he make Jimin love him again? 

His mind went back to the bathroom the day Jimin had tried to make an advance. 

<Would Jimin be happy if he knew you were forcing yourself?> 

Taehyung looked at Jimin. He could see the worry, he could see the love, but he could also see the tiredness Jimin felt. 

<Would Jimin be happy if he knew you were forcing yourself?> 

Well, there’s only one way to find out. 

[1]

Taehyung pushed Jimin’s body towards the bed, sitting on top of him and pinning him down. Jimin yelled in surprise, clearly not expecting such action from him.

 “Tae? What are you–?” 

Taehyung interrupted him with a kiss. It started normal, Taehyung not really knowing what he was doing, before remembering what Jimin had done before. He tried to replicate it as his best, trying to use his tongue, ignoring the disgust he felt with his own actions. 

Jimin seemed to react then, moving his face away, and trying to get out of Taehyung’s grasp. 

“What the fuck are you doing?!” Jimin asked.

He sounded mad, for some reason Taehyung couldn’t understand at the moment. Since he didn’t have access to Jimin’s lips, he started kissing his neck. Taehyung could feel his own body becoming weaker, probably a result of doing something he really didn’t want to do. He couldn’t feel any strength in his arms and legs, and it was just seconds before he lost control to Jimin, who immediately kicked him out of the bed. Taehyung fell, but it didn’t hurt as much as how his insides were hurting. He could barely breathe, his brain was in overload, his hands were still shaking. He started sobbing then, closing his eyes and feeling just… weak. 

[1E]

He felt something warm wrapping him, and just then he remembered that he wasn’t alone. Jimin had put a blanket around him while saying something Taehyung couldn’t understand at all. His boyfriend seemed to notice it, for he started to make gestures with his hands and to move his lips slower. Taehyung read his lips. 

[Breathe, Tae. You need to breathe]

He did. They were short, quick breaths, but it was something. Each time he inhaled and exhaled, they became longer and more estable, and Taehyung felt slightly better. 

He could hear Jimin now. 

“... fine, babe. You’re doing fine. Keep breathing for me, ok? I’ll go find you some water.” Before Jimin could try and stand up, Taehyung wrapped his arms around him, starting to panic again. He didn’t want to be alone at all. Jimin seemed to understand the message. “Shhh, calm down. I won’t move, ok? But I need you to keep breathing.” He started running his finger across Taehyung’s skin, trying to soothe him. 

Taehyung gulped. It was now or never. 

“I’m sorry,” he mumbled, his throat sore. It was probably the result of crying so much.

Jimin looked at him, eyes full of sadness, but smiling. “There’s nothing to be sorry for.” Jimin used his fingers to wipe away Taehyung’s tears, but it was fruitless. He was still crying. 

“I’m sorry for not being a good boyfriend.” Taehyung hiccuped. “I’m sorry that you felt you couldn’t tell me about what happened with Namjoon and Seokjin, I’m sorry that I pushed you to sleep with other people. I’m sorry for not being enough for you, for not being able to please you like that. Jimin, I–” He looked at Jimin straight into his eyes. “I know you lied, I know you’re sleeping with both Yoongi and Jungkook. And I hate it, I hate it so much…” He pressed his lips together for a second. “I know it’s my fault, all of this is my fault, if I was normal , if I was a functional human.” 

He could see Jimin’s expression change to different things at the same time, but his brain was giving him a headache, so he couldn’t even try to understand how his boyfriend was feeling. 

“Tae, oh god, no.” Jimin hugged him immediately, his voice cracking. “This is my fault, god. I shouldn’t have– You almost tried to–” Jimin was crying too, that much was obvious to even him. “Never, ever , try to force yourself to do something just because you think someone else will like it. I’m so sorry I made you feel like this, this is all my fault .”

They stayed together, crying for hours. Both of them finally realized how much they had hurt each other, how broken they actually were. They didn’t know how to fix it, though, so they didn’t. Taehyung eventually fell asleep, waking up to an empty bed and an even emptier apartment. 

Jimin was nowhere to be seen.

III. 

After he realized Jimin had left him alone in his apartment, he went back to the bed and cried for hours and hours. He didn’t care that he was supposed to go to work, he didn’t care so he didn’t even check the time. He just needed to let out all the tears he had left. At some point, after his body couldn’t produce any more tears, he just stayed in Jimin’s bed -- a void, a feeling of emptiness consuming him.

Where was Jimin? Why wasn’t he with him in the morning? Where did he go? Taehyung was so confused. Was he going to come back? Should he wait in the apartment? He didn’t have the energy to move, anyway, so he might as well just stay put. What if Jimin returned and he didn’t find Taehyung? Would he think something bad? 

Are you sure he’s going to come back, though? 

...No. 

And that was the scariest thing. 

They didn’t talk about it, Taheyung had no idea where they both stood. Were they still boyfriends? Did Jimin’s absence mean they were broken up? Taehyung decided to wait. He didn’t move from where he was. He just waited, and waited, and waited. 

Ironically enough, it was Yoongi and Jungkook who found him. 

Taehyung couldn’t remember it, though.

✤✤✤

Jungkook was banging at the door. 

“Jimin! Where have you been? We’ve been trying to text you for two days!”

No one answered. Jungkook continued banging. 

“JIMIN!”

Nothing. 

Yoongi sighed.  “Maybe he’s not here after all”

“Where else could he be? He’s not at work, he isn’t answering his phone. He might be dead and we wouldn’t know.” 

Jungkook knew he was probably exaggerating, but he thought it was justified. After all, Jimin is missing, for God’s sake. 

He tried again. 

This time, an old man appeared from another apartment. “Why are you being so loud?” 

Jungkook had the decency to feel a little bit ashamed. “I’m sorry, sir. We’re just trying to get our friend to answer the door.” 

The old man’s eyes widened, now smiling. 

“Oh, so you’re friends with Jimin? Don’t worry, he’s probably at work right now, or is at his boyfriend’s house. That kid, I used to see him all the time and now that he got himself a partner I barely see him anymore. The other day, like two days ago? I saw him in the morning. It was early, maybe five in the morning. Wonder what he was doing that day since he was in a rush...but he still greeted me when I was taking my dog out for a walk. More people his age should be like him.” The man chuckled. “Oh well, if you want to wait for him inside I can open the door for you. He trusted me with the key in case of an emergency. Be right back.”

As the man went back inside his apartment, Yoongi and Jungkook just awkwardly stayed there, waiting. 

Well, he wasn’t expecting this turn of events, but he wasn’t complaining either. 

The old man came back in a matter of seconds, opening the door after telling them to say hi to Jimin for him. Once they were inside the apartment, they both looked at each other and walked into Jimin’s bedroom. There was a small sound of hiccuping, like someone was just sobbing. 

It didn’t sound like Jimin, though. 

Just after Jungkook entered, he felt himself freezing upon the view. In front of him was Kim Taehyung, Jimin’s boyfriend, crying on Jimin’s bed. 

“What the– “ Yoongi closed his eyes, running his hand through his hair. “We need to call Namjoon.” 

And why the fuck should they– 

Ah, that’s right. Namjoon and Taehyung were cousins. 

Jungkook looked at Taehyung. “Do you think he might know where Jimin is?” He asked, pressing his lips into a fine line. Yoongi just gave Taehyung another look. 

“If he does, I don’t think he can tell us right now. Be right back.” He stepped away, leaving Jungkook with Taehyung. He snorted, the situation feeling even more surreal. 

And to think this is the guy Jimin fell for. 

Jungkook knew he was being petty, but he couldn’t really help it. He was still very much in love with Jimin, and the last impressions he had of Taehyung weren’t the greatest. He just couldn’t get what Jimin had seen in Taehyung that was more shining than what Jungkook could offer. Was it that Taehyung was new to him? Or that Jungkook had spent too much time away from him and now he had forgotten completely about their love? 

Jungkook hadn’t. Couldn’t forget about it. 

He heard Yoongi talking to Namjoon, but ignored them in favor of watching Taehyung instead. 

Now that he actually looked at him, Jungkook did feel bad for the guy. Something clearly happened that left him in such a poor state, and not even Jungkook’s resentment could stop him from feeling a bit of sympathy. 

He grabbed Taehyung’s arm, trying to make him get up, but it was fruitless. Taehyung acted just like a doll, void of life. 

“Come on, Taehyung-ssi. You must know what happened to Jiminie, right?”

Taehyung didn’t answer. Jungkook bit the inside of his cheek. 

“This is useless… What happened to you?” 

Taehyung looked really bad. He had purple bags under his eyes, his hair looked more like a bird’s nest than actual hair, and he wasn’t close enough to notice it, but Jungkook suspected Taehyung hadn’t taken a shower or brushed his teeth either. 

Yoongi walked into the room again. Jungkook could hear Namjoon’s voice, even though it sounded muffled by Yoongi’s hand. 

“Move Taehyung to the living room.” Jungkook nodded. He didn’t think Taehyung could hold on to him, so he just carried him in bridal style. Sure enough, all of Taehyung’s limbs immediately succumbed to gravity. 

He was right. Taehyung stunk . His poor nose screamed, and Jungkook made a mental note to tell Yoongi that they should bathe him. Or tell Namjoon to do it. 

Jungkook sighed, walking to the couch and leaving Taehyung on it.

If he took extra care so he would be in a comfortable position, no one needed to know. 

Jungkook moved closer to Yoongi, listening to the conversation.

“... in this state. I don’t think he can be left alone, Namjoon.” 

Jungkook could clearly hear the way Namjoon sighed. 

“ In that case, wait until I get there. My class finishes in around half an hour, and it will take me around another half to get there. ”

“It’s fine. See ya.” 

Jungkook leaned on the wall, looking at Yoongi with a raised eyebrow. “So, are we gonna babysit Jimin’s boyfriend now? ‘Cause even though he needs a bath, I didn’t expect to be the one washing his hair today.” 

Yoongi sighed, pocketing his phone and moving to the kitchen. “If Namjoon is right and Taehyung has been here since Wednesday, then the first thing he needs is water and food. I’ll prepare something.” He looked at Jungkook. “Give him the water and try to talk to him. And stop that attitude. I already have to deal with Jimin and Taehyung, I don’t want to take care of you too.”

Jungkook looked at Taehyung. He still was unresponsive, still in the same position Jungkook had left him. A bit of shame crept inside Jungkook’s head. Yoongi was right, this wasn’t the time for pettiness. Jungkook nodded, doing as told. He went for a glass of water, putting it on the floor next to the couch. He crouched down, just so he could be closer to Taehyung’s face. His eyes were glassy and unfocused, and Jungkook guessed he was lost in his own thoughts. He put his hand on Taehyung’s hair, caressing it, and only then Taehyung seemed to notice he was there. Still, he didn’t show any other reaction besides staring at Jungkook. 

“Taehyung-ssi, I need you to sit for a couple of seconds so you can drink water. Can you do that for me?” Taehyung didn’t respond. Jungkook sighed. “I’m sorry for doing this, Taehyung-ssi, but I need you to drink this.” He grabbed Taehyung’s side, pulling him into a better position. Then, he tried again, now pressing the glass against Taehyung’s lips. Taehyung opened his mouth slightly, and Jungkook used the opportunity to make him drink the water. As Taehyung drank, a few drops dripped from his mouth, wetting his shirt. Then, Taehyung choked, moving away and spitting water into Jungkook’s face. The glass ended up falling from Jungkook’s hand, wetting them both. Jungkook groaned, standing up and going for something to dry them. He could hear Taehyung coughing in the background. 

Well, at least he was reacting now. 

❃❃❃

As Jungkook entered the kitchen, Yoongi looked at him with a raised eyebrow. “When I told you to talk to him I didn’t mean that you should kill him.” 

Jungkook sighed, grabbing some paper towels. “He drank the water, though.”

Yoongi just rolled his eyes, walking to the fridge and taking out some vegetables. Jungkook went back to where Taehyung was, leaving Yoongi alone with his thoughts. 

The whole situation was weird. He had just wanted to find Jimin, not to take care of Jimin’s boyfriend. But it wasn’t like he could leave the guy alone, he wasn’t an asshole. 

But what exactly had happened? He took out his phone, trying to call Jimin for the nth time. Just like before, no one answered. 

It annoyed Yoongi a lot. 

After knowing Jimin for so long, he knew Jimin had only two ways of dealing with his problems. He either had sex, or he ran away. Considering all his usual booty calls were looking for him, Yoongi guessed he had run away this time, but where? Was he with his parents? Or had he decided to just go to a random place for a while? 

Yoongi remembered how one time, during their relationship, Jimin and he had a fight that resulted in Jimin booking the first flight available to Russia. It was a short trip, only lasting three days, but Jimin had cut communication with absolutely everyone for the duration of the trip. After he came back, he seemed more relaxed. 

“I just needed a break, hyung,” he had said. 

A break. 

Now, Yoongi wasn’t an idiot. He had noticed that the day Jimin had messaged him and Jungkook for the first time, something had happened. He knew Jimin was only seeking them because he was trying to avoid something, but at the moment, he didn’t care enough. He was aware of the open relationship Jimin and Taehyung had, and (if he was completely honest) he had missed the intimacy with Jimin, so at the moment he thought “fuck it” and slept with him anyway. The problem was that, since the root of Jimin’s worries wasn’t related to him, Jimin never really explained what had happened. But he kept coming to them– To him. He knows that whatever happened between Jimin and Taehyung had to be a fight, and the fact that it had been two days ago —the same day he and Jungkook had slept with Jimin— couldn’t be a coincidence.  

He started to feel something inside his throat, something that momentarily left him without breath. 

Guilt. 

What was he feeling guilty for? Yoongi had no idea. But he still felt like the whole situation was somehow his fault. 

✵✵✵

As soon as he ended the call, Namjoon did everything he could to not lose it in front of his classroom. He knew his students were wondering what his call was for, since he usually didn’t use his phone in front of them, but this wasn’t something he could explain to 14-year-olds. 

He took a deep breath, before entering his classroom again. All his students were looking at him, but he just walked to his computer and closed the slide he was on.

“For today, you all can do whatever you want as long as you stay silent. I can’t continue teaching right now, and since this is the last period. It wouldn’t make sense for me to find a substitute teacher. Just– I don’t know, play with your phones or something.” 

That said, he collapsed on his chair, closing his eyes and loosening his tie.  

They might have found Taehyung, but Namjoon wasn’t sure Taehyung hadn’t lost himself in the meantime. 

With a sigh, he proceeded to grab his phone. 

Joonie: Can you pick me up? Yoongi and Jungkook found Taehyung 

Seokjinnie: [...]

Seokjinnie: I’ll be there. 

❀❀❀

Seokjin was welcomed to Jimin’s place by the sound of someone throwing up. 

It wasn’t difficult to guess who it was from. 

“Shit.” Namjoon said, running inside. Seokjin followed. 

The first person Seokjin saw was Jungkook, who was on his knees. He couldn’t see his face, only his back, but he could guess he probably was panicking, especially by the way he seemed to move. 

“Taehyung-ssi? Can you hear me? Hello?” Seokjin got closer, looking over Jungkook’s shoulder. 

He wished he hadn’t. 

[2]

Taehyung was on the floor, seemingly unresponsive. There was a string of saliva that ran from his mouth to the floor, where a pound of –what Seokjin guessed– had been soup. He felt bile in his throat, the smell making him nauseous. 

But that wasn’t the problem at the moment. 

Namjoon tried to give Taehyung some slaps, but he remained unresponsive. 

“We need to get him to the hospital.” Yoongi said, phone already out. “I’ll call an ambulance.” 

“It will be faster if we drive him there.” Namjoon said, getting up. Yoongi looked at him with a deadpan stare. His phone was already on his ear. 

“I don’t think any of us can be calm enough to drive him there.” He said, turning around. There was a sound from his phone. “Hello? My friend–” 

Seokjin tuned him out, now running to the bathroom himself. He could barely lift the lid before he threw up everything he’d eaten too. Then, he cleaned his mouth and sat on the floor. 

[2E]

He needed time to process everything. Before now, he had believed Jimin and Taehyung had gone on some random trip without telling them, and that was the reason why no one could reach either of them. 

But he was wrong. Somehow, the reality was a lot worse. 

How had Taehyung ended up like that? And where was Jimin? There were so many different questions but Seokjin didn’t have the capacity at the moment to think of any answer. 

Suddenly, the door of the bathroom opened. 

“Hyung?” Jungkook entered the room, worry fully showing his face. Seokjin gave him a weak smile. “Are you ok?”

“I’m fine, Kook-ah. Just-” He moved his hand in the air. “It was a lot.” 

“Namjoon-hyung and Yoongi-hyung left with Taehyung in an ambulance. They said to meet them at the hospital, and I already texted Hobi-hyung. He’s on his way too.” 

Seokjin nodded, trying to get up, but almost slipping. Jungkook was fast to catch him. 

Hold yourself together, Kim Seokjin!

“Hyung?” 

Seokjin sighed. “Let’s go, Kook-ah.” 

They rapidly went to Seokjin’s car. Since he wasn’t feeling very well, he gave his keys to Jungkook, sitting in the passenger seat and closing his eyes. 

He tried to block out the constant movement of the car as well as all the sounds around him. Thankfully, Jungkook didn’t say anything either. 

It was a quick drive, probably no more than 10 minutes. They rushed to the entry, where Hoseok was already waiting for them. 

“They’re in room 207. He’s really dehydrated, so they’re giving him a saline solution.” He was talking as he ran towards the room, not looking at them at all.

“Is he still unconscious?” Asked Jungkook, turning on one of the corners. 

“He kind of woke up, but he’s not talking to anyone. We’re still waiting.” Hoseok decreased his velocity, until he stopped in front of one of the rooms. He opened the door for Jungkook and Seokjin. 

Just like Hoseok had said, Taehyung had an IV saline solution connected to his arm, as well as different cables attached to his body. He looked even worse than before, eyes lost in the nothing. Beside him, Namjoon was silently crying on Yoongi’s shoulder. 

Seokjin felt a pain in his chest. 

“The doctors said he’s gonna be okay, Namjoon-ah,” Yoongi said, while holding Namjoon’s hand. 

“Hyung, I– I feel like all of this is my fault.” Seokjin could barely understand what Namjoon was babbling, but it was enough for the pain to increase. Yoongi sighed. 

“It’s not. Don’t think that way.” 

Jungkook rapidly moved to Namjoon’s side, sitting on the arm of the chair, and hugging him. “Hyung, whatever happened, we can deal with it after Taehyung-ssi gets better.” Jungkook sounded like he was about to cry as well. “Please, don’t cry.”

It was hard, seeing everyone in such a state. Even Yoongi and Jungkook, who Seokjin was sure didn’t have any relationship with Taehyung, seemed worried. 

Seokjin sighed, going to the other side of Taehyung’s bed. He caressed his hair. 

Seokjin could remember the same Taehyung being just a kid, his smile always shining the brightest in any room. Now, it was like that person had disappeared completely.  Hoseok went to where Seokjin was, hugging him. 

“We have to fix this,” he murmured, looking at the others. “How do we fix this?”

Yoongi put his hand to his mouth, biting his nails. “The first thing we need to do is find out what happened at Jimin’s apartment, but I’m not sure how to ask–” 

Before he could finish, there was a movement from Taehyung. He had opened his eyes even more, and jumped a bit, like he had just snapped out of a trance. 

“J-Jimin…?” His voice was raspy, which made sense since he probably hadn’t used it in days. He tried to look at everyone in the room, like it was the first time he realized where he was, who he was with. The monitor that showed his vital signs emitted a sound, and the numbers started going up really fast. Two nurses entered the room, running. One started to move the machine while the other kicked all of them out, ignoring all the questions everybody threw at them. 

The last thing Seokjin saw was Taehyung passing out again, nurses fussing all over him. 

✩✩✩

When Taehyung finally woke up, he felt like it had been minutes since he realized Jimin had left him.

He was told it had been four days since then.  

Taehyung spent the next three hours crying. 

✩✩✩

Taehyung was discharged the following day. 

Namjoon drove him to his apartment, wanting to keep an eye on him. It didn’t matter how much Taehyung protested, he knew how stubborn his cousin was when he thought he was right, so he didn’t expect Namjoon to actually obey him. And, in all honesty, he really didn’t want to be alone. It scared him, made him feel unlovable. 

Maybe it was for the best that Namjoon made him stay. 

As soon as they arrived, Taehyung went directly to the bathroom, wanting to scrub the hospital feeling from his skin. Namjoon had already told him that Hoseok had gone to his place and packed a lot of his clothes and necessities for him, so it was only a matter of going to the guest room for him to find what to wear. After changing, he went to the living room. As soon as he stepped foot there, he noticed Namjoon wasn’t alone. 

Everyone was there. 

(Except for Jimin. Jimin was still missing.)

“I hope you don’t mind that I invited them.” Namjoon said, sitting on the couch. He was smiling, but the looks in his eyes said ‘You tell me and I’ll kick them out.’ 

Taehyung shrugged. “It’s fine. I guess they’re here to… talk.” 

“Only if you want to,” Seokjin immediately said, interlacing his fingers. He seemed nervous. All of them did.

Taehyung didn’t feel anything. No, he did. He felt pain. But his body was used to it by then, so he just ignored it. 

“It’s… fine, I guess.” He sat on the couch, beside Namjoon. He hugged himself. “I don’t really remember anything since the morning Jimin left, but I hope it might help you.”

Hoseok sat beside him, hugging him. The gesture felt nice, but it wasn’t enough. Something was missing. 

“Jimin and I…” Taehyung stared at the ceiling, but his eyes were out of focus. He was mentally reviving each moment he spent with Jimin the last few mon- No, since they met. “Jimin and I haven’t been on the best terms for a while. It started— shit, I’m not even sure when it started, but one day things started to go down. We just… ignored it. Ignored our problems, because apparently that’s what boyfriends do. We just- we stopped talking. And then— He— With—” Tears started coming out of his eyes, but Taehyung didn’t stop talking. “It feels like, well, like it was years ago. Namjoon told me what happened between him, Jimin, and Seokjin. And then I went ho—to his apartment. I stood outside for, I don’t know, an hour? And then I saw— I saw Jungkook and Yoongi coming out of it.”

Hoseok’s arms tightened around him, but Taehyung didn’t give him any kind of response. He was silent, his fight with Jimin running like a movie inside his head. 

He had made so many mistakes… maybe if he wasn’t so Taehyung everything could have worked better, right? It was his fault, and his fault only. 

His hands started shaking, and his voice almost disappeared. He couldn’t emit a sound, so the room was only filled with the erratic noise his lungs made. 

Someone grabbed his hands, kissing them. Taehyung looked up. 

It was Seokjin. 

“Tae, please, breathe .” 

Taehyung did. With the help of Seokjin, of course, who whispered instructions in his ear. 

When he was finally composed, he smiled at Seokjin. At least he didn’t hate him for making Jimin leave. 

But then again, he was Seokjin’s friend. So maybe the only reason he was helping him was that he felt like he had to.

You’re just making yourself sad.

Taehyung left out a small, bitter laugh.  So what? 

He deserved to be sad. 

“Taehyung,” Namjoon called, taking him out of his head. 

“Yeah. I’m here.” Barely. 

“You don’t have to continue if you don’t want to.” 

He weakly smiled at Namjoon. 

“If I don’t say this now…” Taehyung bit his lip. “I don’t think I ever will.” 

Namjoon just nodded, but he still seemed worried. 

“By the time I walked in Jimin was asleep. I was in his room and stroked his hair for a bit. I think I was crying? I’m not sure, but he woke up, and I—“ Taehyung sobbed. This was the difficult part, the part that he felt most ashamed of. “I just… I’m not sure why, but I just came onto Jimin. I kissed him, but it was…” Taehyung moved his hands, not really knowing how to explain it. He couldn’t look anyone in the eye. 

Thankfully, he didn’t have to. Everyone seems to understand.  Namjoon took one of his hands, squeezing it. 

“Jimin– He made me snap out of it, and then I apologized. For everything. He tried to tell me it wasn’t my fault, but– I know it is.”

“Is not.” Seokjin immediately said. “None of this is your fault.” 

But Taehyung didn’t want to hear that. He felt like it was his fault.

“You’re saying that because you weren’t there, hyung. This is my fault.” 

“Seokjin is right, Tae.” Hoseok moved him to his lap, and Taehyung felt comforted by the gesture. Somehow, he felt protected . “This is no one’s fault. Or maybe it is everyone’s fault.”

“We should have talked more...” Namjoon murmured. Taehyung looked at him. By far, he seemed the most affected by what was happening. Taehyung tried to smile, for Namjoon, but he couldn’t. Namjoon wasn’t even looking at him, anyway. “We should have talked more. This… this never could have worked without talking, and we just... didn’t.”

Taehyung then diverted his stare to Jungkook and Yoongi. They were both looking at the floor, which made their faces hard to read. But they just felt… ashamed. They were holding hands, though, and Taehyung was glad they could still find comfort between themselves. 

It was such a pity that things had gotten that bad. Taehyung would have liked to actually get along with them. 

✩✩✩

It became something normal, for the rest of his… friends? 

Could he really call them all friends? 

For the rest of Namjoon’s friends to visit him. He spent more of his days with Namjoon, just… existing. But now he also had Hoseok, who worked in the afternoon so he could hang out with him in the morning. He had Seokjin, whose nights he now spent with him at Namjoon’s. And he even had, to his surprise, afternoons with Yoongi and Jungkook, sometimes both of them , if he was lucky. 

For Taehyung, those were the most surreal moments. He didn’t have any kind of relationship with them, but now…

Now he got the opportunity to actually get to know them. 

It was funny. In his eyes, Yoongi and Jungkook were extremely different. Yoongi was calm (most of the time) and wise, he was happy with just existing in the same space as other people, but he also enjoyed being around the others. He always smiled when he was with Namjoon, most of the time just talking. He seemed happy when he got to cook with Seokjin, as they always played around. With Hoseok, Taehyung got to see Yoongi’s most childish moments, when he just threw everything out of the window just so he could sing some Japanese song that Taehyung didn’t know. Still, Taehyung appreciated how complex his personality was. He wanted to learn more. 

And then there was Jungkook. Taehyung wanted to laugh at himself for ever finding him intimidating. Jungkook was, quite literally, the most pure person Taehyung had ever met. He was full of ticks and odd habits, Taehyung’s favorite being the moment when he got surprised and his eyes opened completely. He was literally just like a bunny, one that Taehyung wanted to protect, and judging by the way everyone else also babied him a lot, he knew he wasn’t alone. 

The first few times he was alone with them were awkward, Taehyung would never lie about it. They just didn’t know what to say , and it was worse than with the others since Taehyung was well aware they both hated him. But now, they were trying to be better, to actually get to know him. 

The first of those times was the most memorable one. He had received them with a smile, leading them to Namjoon’s couch. 

“Joonie-hyung isn't here right now, Yoongi-ssi, Jungkook-ssi. He’s with my aunt. But he should be back in around two hours.” 

“It’s fine,” Yoongi had said. “We didn’t come here to see him, anyway.” 

Taehyung stopped at those words. He didn’t turn around, didn’t face either of them. 

“We… We wanted to say sorry, Taehyung-ssi.” Jungkook said, his voice sounding extremely small. “We didn’t really treat you the best way, and that’s just on us. We just— not that it justifies what we did, but— For us—“

“You still loved Jimin,” Taehyung said, still facing the wall in front of him. “You loved him, and I… I was in the way.”

“Regardless of how we feel, it was wrong, Taehyung-ssi. Feelings don’t excuse you from being a human and treating others with respect.” This made Taehyung turn around, looking at Yoongi directly in the eyes. “It didn’t matter how much we loved Jimin...before we were his exes, we were his friends. And still, we took advantage of whatever agreement you two had.” 

“That was wrong of us, Taehyung-ssi. And honestly, we don’t expect you to actually forgive us. We don’t really deserve that.” Jungkook bit the inside of his cheek, scratching his head. “We lost that right after we decided that hating you made more sense than actually getting to know you. We can’t change our actions, so we...We just wanted to apologize. You’re not obligated to accept it either, Taehyung-ssi.”

“Hyung.” Taehyung corrected him, making Jungkook open his eyes in surprise. He couldn’t help but coo a little bit at him. Jungkook was truly adorable. “If we’re gonna leave all this in the past and move on, then you should call me hyung.” 

“The same goes for you, Taehyung,” said Yoongi, smiling. He had a gummy smile, Taehyung noted. It was endearing. “I know I don’t deserve to be called hyung, but… if you want to, you can call me that.” 

“It would be an honor, hyung.” Taehyung got closer to them, opening his arms and hugging both of them. They seemed surprised, but it wasn’t long until they returned the hug. 

“I promise I will be a better hyung… for both of you,” murmured Yoongi. Taehyung’s smile got bigger. 

That was everything he could ask for. 

✩✩✩

The thing about missing Jimin, Taehyung thought, was that life didn’t stop for him. 

He still woke up every morning, he still ate, he still enjoyed his life. The difference was that now he had to do it alone , instead of with his boyfriend. He needed to learn how to live by himself again.

Part of it was going back to teaching. 

Since it was the week after the break, it meant it was time to start with a new unit. And, after years of doing the same thing, Taehyung was able to teach what they needed to know almost automatically. Fifteen minutes into the lesson, the students knew enough to be left alone, so he went to his storage closet and took out a blank canvas. Then, he went to his desk and started sketching. 

He couldn’t remember the last time he did anything artistic that wasn’t related to his job, but he felt the urge to draw something. The idea was just coming out of his head. He wasn’t even aware of what it was, he didn’t care. He just wanted to create.  

Time flew while Taehyung traced lines, added shadows, cleaned everything. Before he could even notice it, the bell rang, and his students left the room. He had lunch next, so he just continued drawing. 

For the first time in a while, Taehyung was genuinely smiling. 

✩✩✩

That night, he prepared himself for a self-care session. He undressed himself, grabbed his favorite bottle of wine and a glass, and prepared the bathtub. He spent around half an hour there, just enjoying himself, Frank Sinatra in the background. When his stomach screamed for food, Taehyung laughed, reaching for a towel. 

Time for some take out. 

He rapidly put on some comfy clothes, smelling the floral detergent on them, still singing in the low croon of Sinatra. He then used the towel to dry his hair while walking to the kitchen, where he had his list of take out numbers. Just as he was about to dial one, the doorbell rang. 

Taehyung froze. 

He wasn’t expecting anyone, who could it be?

Maybe it’s Jimin.

Taehyung gulped, his legs suddenly feeling boneless. He started walking towards the door, each step feeling heavier than the last. It probably lasted just seconds, but it felt like hours. He was so nervous… He grabbed the door handle, opening it. 

“Tae!” 

Taehyung only breathed again after he saw Hoseok’s smiling face. 

“Holy shit, hyung. You scared me.What are you doing here?” He walked back inside, Hoseok following behind. 

“I’m taking you on a date!” 

Taehyung stopped abruptly, turning to face Hoseok. “Excuse me, what?” 

Hoseok just smiled, rubbing Taehyung’s hair. “I’m taking you on a date. I have everything planned, you just have to come.  Get pretty, and we can go!” 

“But– a date? I can’t! Jimin– I– You–” 

Hoseok cupped Taehyung’s face, getting closer, and effectively shutting him up. 

“Taehyung, breathe.” He was smiling at him, and Taehyung felt himself relaxing. “Don’t overthink this. You can think of this date however you want, however you feel the most comfortable with. I don’t care, I just want you to have fun.” He then took a step back, grabbing Taehyung’s hand. “Dates do not have to be romantic, they can just be you having fun with someone else. A friend, a partner, even a family member. I take all my friends on dates all the time, not because I want to engage in a non-platonic relationship with them, but because they deserve to be treated well. You deserve to be treated well, too.” 

Taehyung’s eyes started to get watery. “Hyung–” 

Hoseok turned him around and pushed him slightly. “Come on, get ready. We’re going to an art museum and then we’ll go get dinner. You’ll have fun.”

And indeed, Taehyung had a lot of fun that night. 

✩✩✩

His date with Hoseok opened his eyes to a lot of things Taehyung had been ignoring recently. 

First, he had missed going out just for the sake of it.

Secondly, Hoseok (and all his friends, actually) really cared about him beyond being Namjoon’s cousin or Jimin’s boyfriend. 

Thirdly, there was more to his life than being sad over Jimin’s absence. 

That didn’t mean he missed his boyfriend any less, and there were moments when he still cried over Jimin not being there with him, but… It wasn’t all he did anymore. 

It all started after he came back from his “date.” He had looked at his apartment, the remains of what he had prepared earlier that day. The bottle of wine was still half-full in the kitchen, and just beside it the list of the take-out places. 

A weird feeling crept into his chest, making him feel some kind of embarrassment and pain. Looking back, going out with Hoseok had been a lot more… Liberating than his idea of eating by himself. 

Taehyung took out his phone, scrolling down his (admittedly, short) list of contacts. He clicked on one of them, pressing his phone against his ear. 

Ring… Ring…

“Hello?” 

“Hyung! Are you and Jungkookie free tomorrow?” Taehyung asked, smiling. There was silence on the other end of the line. 

“Why do you assume I would know whether Jungkook is free or not? You should ask him instead of me.” 

Taehyung chuckled. “I’m pretty sure you know his schedule better than him. Besides, I bet he’s there with you right now.”

Now, he heard another person laughing, clearly amused at the situation. 

“He got you there hyung.” Jungkook said in the background. 

“Shhh, adults are talking right now.” 

“Oh, so I’m not an adult now? That wasn’t what you said last–” 

Taehyung couldn’t contain his laugh anymore. Both Jungkook and Yoongi stopped bickering then, and Taehyung wished he had FaceTimed his Hyung instead of calling. He could perfectly imagine their faces at the moment. 

An idea surged in his head. He walked to the small room where he usually painted, grabbing the canvas he had started using during his class and some brushes. 

“So,” Taehyung continued talking to the phone, “can we do something tomorrow?” 

“Well, despite what most people think, I actually do have a job and have something to do tomorrow night, but you are invited to join me, Hyung. Yoongi-hyung was coming with me anyway”

“This conversation is making me realize I spend way too much time with you.” 

“That’s ‘cause you love me.” 

“Before you two continue making me feel like a third wheel, can either of you send me the details for tomorrow?” 

“Don’t worry, hyung. I will. See ya.” 

“Bye Taehyungie!”

Taehyung smiled at the nickname, before saying bye and hanging up. 

Who would have thought, a couple of months before, that he would be calling both Jungkook and Yoongi to hang out together? 

Maybe there’s good coming out of this situation. 

He opened one of his cans of paint. 

Time to work. 

✩✩✩

The time Taehyung spent creating art, hanging out with friends, and teaching helped him to miss Jimin a little bit less each day. He still missed him, of course, but now he could allow himself to walk outside of his classroom without the fear of seeing his missing boyfriend (because he still thought of Jimin as his boyfriend, that wouldn’t change unless they both agreed to end their relationship). Nonetheless, Taehyung knew there was something he needed to do before he could consider himself totally “fine.”

He needed to talk with Namjoon and Seokjin about the night Jimin had been upset. 

It was funny, because for all the time Taehyung has been around them since that day, he never really asked what had happened that day. 

(Well, it was more that he feared the answer, but that wasn’t the point). 

He took his phone, opening his messages. 

Taetae: Can we meet? 

Joonie: Sure. What for? I’m just Namjooning in the park. 

Taetae: I wanna talk with you and Seokjin about something.

Joonie: [...]

Taetae: It’s Jimin-related. 

Joonie: I’ll text Seokjin. See you later.  

✩✩✩

Taehyung had the whole conversation rehearsed. He was going to sit in front of Seokjin and Namjoon and demand them to tell him what happened with Jimin. It would be quick, and they would continue with their lives immediately after. 

Of course, that wasn’t what happened. 

Sure, Taehyung had been all confident while opening the door and welcoming his… guests. But as soon as they all sat down he completely forgot what he was supposed to say. Seokjin and Namjoon didn’t exactly help, remaining in silence as well. It lasted for about 5 minutes, and it consisted of the three of them just awkwardly staring at each other, but Taehyung swore it was the most tense moment in his life. 

Finally, he cleared his throat. 

“You two know why I asked you to come,” Taehyung said, his voice slightly higher than usual, while playing with his fingers. 

Seokjin smiled, probably trying to reassure him. He vaguely remembered how, when he was younger and had just met him, Seokin would always smile at him when he was having a crappy day. It made him feel better, and he internally thanked Seokjin for being there. 

Namjoon looked down, probably so he wouldn’t have to make eye contact. “I guess we owe you that much, right?” 

His voice sounded off, and Taehyung got a sense that Seokjin felt weird about the whole thing. Whether it was from guilt, sadness, or shame, he didn’t know, and didn’t want to ask. 

“Just… Why did Jimin look so upset after meeting you two?” 

Seokjin leaned over the table, taking Taehyung’s hand between his. “Before we talk about this… I wanted you to know that we would never do anything to hurt you. But you also need to know that we.. we can’t really control our feelings, you know?”

“Hyung–” Tae started, but Seokjin just smiled at him. It was the saddest smile he had ever seen on his face. 

It was weird. Seokjin was the most handsome man Taehyung knew, so he wasn’t really surprised that even heartbroken he was still as beautiful as ever. It was like an actor in the middle of a tragedy. 

“The day we met Jimin, we kind of… told him something, and he didn’t really take it well.”

Taehyung frowned. “What did you tell him?”

Seokjin was about to answer, but then Namjoon looked up and met Taehyung’s eyes. 

“We told him the truth,” he said. “We told him that we were still in love with him.”

I think I will never stop loving them both .

Taehyung’s gaze was fully focused on Namjoon.  Both cousins just stared at each other, not making a sound.

But I’ve moved on, and so have they.

Taehyung was the one who broke the silence. 

“You lied to me.” He couldn’t conceal the accusatory tone of his voice even if he wanted to.

Namjoon looked like he had just bitten into a lime. “You knew I loved them. I never lied about that.” 

“But you told me you had moved on.”

“And I did . But then… this whole thing with Jimin...” He closed his eyes for a couple of seconds and sighed. “It just… brought everything back.”

Taehyung pulled his hand away and slammed it against the table. “Well, you could have told me that!” He yelled. Namjoon frowned.

“How was I supposed to do that?! I couldn’t just go and say ‘Hey, Taehyung, I just realized I’m nowhere near over your boyfriend. You know, the one I’m also fucking.’ It doesn’t work like that!”

“It doesn’t matter! You just left me in the dark like what I thought meant nothing!”

“I couldn’t! He’s your BOYFRIEND.”

“BUT I’M YOUR COUSIN!” 

“ENOUGH!” Both Namjoon and Taehyung turned their heads to Seokjin. “Stop yelling.” 

“But—“ Taehyung tried, but one look from Seokjin was enough to shut him up. 

“You two are grown men AND cousins, it’s stupid for you to fight like little kids.” He was talking fast, making gestures with his hands. “Now calm down and talk like the mature adults you are.” 

Taehyung’s cheeks were burning, slightly ashamed of himself. Namjoon was in a similar state. 

Seokjin moved his head again, urging them to talk. 

Taehyung bit his lower lip. “How did Jimin react?” 

Seokjin sighed. “At first he didn’t say anything. He just stared at us for about 5 minutes and then just… left. We didn’t really talk again afterwards. Well, at least he didn’t talk to me.”

“Yes, Namjoon–“ His cousin flinched when mentioned. “–told me that the day of my fight with Jimin.” 

Namjoon pressed his lips together. “I really thought he had told you something about it.”

“Well, he didn’t.” Taehyung crossed his arms over his chest. “I only knew there was something wrong because I saw him that night.” 

Seokjin stood up, walking to where Taehyung was and putting his hand on Taehyung’s arm. “Are you mad at us?” 

Was he mad at them? That was an easy question: He wasn’t. It hurt, of course, because they hadn’t told him, but it is not like he can blame them for falling in love with his boyfriend. 

Park Jimin was the most lovable person Taehyung knew. 

“I’m not, hyung. I’m just– I’m sad? Because I know you two have been loving him for longer than I have.” Seokjin moved his hand from Taehyung’s arm to Taehyung’s hair, caressing it. Taehyung wanted to close his eyes and lean on Seokjin’s hand. “I don’t want you and hyung to hurt, you know? But… I don’t want to lose Jimin either. Well, if I didn’t already lose him.” 

“You haven’t lost him, Tae. He loves you.” Namjoon gave him a small, dimpled smile. “I’m sure of that.” 

“I–” 

Taehyung remembered all his time with Jimin, the way he always took care of him, the way he would always do the impossible for him to be himself in a comfortable space. All the random dates they had just for fun, all the late nights cuddling while watching Netflix. The memories made Taehyung’s heart warm. But then, he also remembered the way Jimin interacted with his friends. The way he could smile at Namjoon and he would get the hug he was asking for, the way he always complimented Seokjin, the way he always had the most fun dancing with Hoseok. Damn, even when he never really saw Jimin interacting with Yoongi and Jungkook, he could picture them just fitting perfectly around his boyfriend. Jimin was always at his best when he was with everybody, not only with Taehyung. 

“Yes, he loves me.” Taehyung sighed. “But I’m not the only one he loves.” 

✩✩✩

If both Namjoon and Seokjin spent the night cuddling Taehyung, well, no one really needed to know. 

✩✩✩

Taehyung knew that, eventually, he would need to face Jimin again. It wasn’t a matter of if , but when. So, every single day he was on Jimin alert. 

At least, he was at the beginning. 

With time, especially after things had normalized with the rest of the group, Taehyung started letting his guard down. He didn’t get scared every single time the bell rang, he could walk around the school without fearing that Jimin would appear from every corner. Eventually, he even started just… accepting that he would never know when Jimin would appear again.

That’s why when he did, the weekend after his talk with Seokjin and Namjoon, he was caught completely unprepared. 

Unfortunately, Jimin decided to knock at his door about 20 minutes after Taehyung had ordered a pizza, so Taehyung opened the door looking exactly like a guy in his late 20s that was ordering food at 8:00pm on a Saturday: Like a mess. And why should he look any different? Even if the delivery guy judged his appearance, it wouldn’t really matter. Or that was what Taehyung thought. 

Sadly, when he opened the door, it wasn't the delivery guy who he faced. 

It was Jimin. 

Jimin, with his blinding smile that always made him feel better. Jimin, with his puffy eyes that dissapeared when he laughed. Jimin, with hands so small Taehyung could hold them and his fingers would cover every inch of the surface. Jimin, who was so kind that Taehyung was sure he could be an angel.

Jimin, his boyfriend, and the person who abandoned him for three weeks. 

He slammed the door in Jimin’s face without even thinking, panicking because what the fuck he just slammed the door on his boyfriend’s face after not seeing him for weeks. 

He opened the door again, panicking. Jimin was still there, giving him a tiny smile. 

“This is a dream,” Taehyung immediately said. “I probably fell asleep while waiting for the pizza and now I’m dreaming about you again.”

Jimin’s smile faltered. “Tae–” 

“Don't,” Taehyung immediately said. “Please, just– don’t.” 

“Listen–”

“Shhh.” 

“Taehyung, we need–” Before Jimin could finish his sentence, Taehyung took his arm and pulled him closer, hugging him.  Jimin clearly wasn’t expecting that, if the squeal he let out said anything, but he automatically found his place between Taehyung’s arms. “Tae..”

“I know, Jimin. I know. Just–” Taehyung closed his eyes, breathing. “I know we need to talk, but– I can’t right now. I haven’t seen you in forever, and you just appeared out of nowhere.” 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t meant to–” 

“I know.” 

There was a lot they would need to talk about but, right at that moment, all Taehyung cared for was the way Jimin fit perfectly against him.

Like they were meant for each other. 

✩✩✩

Taehyung wasn’t sure how long they stood outside, hugging, feeling each other. He didn’t really count the time. It was only when someone cleared their throat that Taehyung opened his eyes, still not releasing his hold on Jimin.

It was the delivery guy. 

“Hi, um… Did either of you order a pizza?” 

Jimin slightly pushed Taehyung away, turning around to face the guy. HIs cheeks were completely red, and Taehyung just wanted to kiss them. 

The guy tried again. “Sir…” 

“Yeah, yeah. Here–” Taehyung looked inside his pocket, giving the guy the first bill he found. “Keep the change, just– Go away.” 

The guy opened his eyes in surprise, but just nodded and handed the box of pizza to Taehyung and left. Jimin giggled. 

“Did you notice that you handed him like thrice what the pizza probably cost?”

As if Taehyung gave a fuck about money at the moment. 

“Doesn’t matter. Just– Come in, Jimin. You wanna talk?” Taehyung walked in, putting the box of pizza on the first surface he found. He then went to the couch, sitting, and patting the seat beside him. “Let’s talk, then.”

Albeit not as enthusiastic as Taehyung, Jimin sat on the couch, putting his hands on his knees and looking down. 

“First of all, I’m sorry I left without telling you.” Jimin ran his hand through his hair. “That was really shitty of me.” 

“It was,” Taehyung agreed, “but Yoongi-hyung told me that’s… usually what you do when you’re overwhelmed.” 

Jimin raised his eyebrows. “Yoongi-hyung? Since when…?” 

For some reason, the question rubbed Taehyung the wrong way. 

He chuckled, but it didn’t have an ounce of joy at all. “Since you decided to leave me and I spent three days in your apartment in shock and ended up in the hospital. Yoongi-hyung and Jungkook were the ones that found me. We've kinda bonded since then.” Jimin flinched. 

He didn’t mean for it to sound that harsh, but… He was in a weird and conflicting emotional state. He was happy because Jimin was back, he was nervous because now he needed to deal with Jimin coming back, and he was bitter because… Well, because Jimin leaving him destroyed him. Those days he spent in shock that he couldn’t really remember, those days where he would just cry himself to sleep… It was emotionally damaging. 

“Tae, I-I didn’t know.” Jimin looked like he was about to cry. Taehyung could feel his own eyes burning. 

“Of course you didn’t. You weren’t here to see it.” He rubbed his eyes. “This… I’m just taking this out on you instead of letting you talk.” 

“You have the right to do so.” Jimin took Taehyung’s hands between his and interlaced their fingers. “Continue. Let out all the anger, Taehyungie.” 

“I don’t want to let out the anger, Jimin. I just…” He sobbed. “I don’t even know what I want to hear from you. I’m happy that you’re here, I really am. But this is just… It’s been some shitty weeks for me, you know?” 

“I’m sorry it took me so long to come back.” 

“I’m sorry for coming onto you that day and making you feel like leaving was the only option.” 

“I’m sorry for not telling you about Yoongi and Jungkook.” 

“And Namjoon and Seokjin.” Taehyung added, with a smile. Jimin’s face mirrored his. 

“I guess you know about that too.” 

“I had time to talk with everyone.” Taehyung turned slightly to his side, leaning on the couch. His position now was perfect for Jimin to just… Put his arms on Taehyung’s torso and cuddle him. 

Jimin took the hint. It was slow, but Taehyung could feel Jimin’s hands roaming on his body, until they wrapped around him completely. 

Neither of them said anything about it. It wasn’t necessary. They both needed the contact, the comfort the other offered. 

It felt nice. It was a break from their situation, even if it was just momentarily.  Taehyung moved his head, breathing on Jimin’s neck, moving himself to Jimin’s lap. Meanwhile, Jimin had started caressing Taehyung’s hair. 

“We weren’t working, were we?” asked Taehyung. He felt Jimin’s head shaking. 

“No… Maybe at first, but… somewhere along the lines we stopped… talking.” Jimin’s voice was trembling. 

There was a pause. 

“What are we going to do, Tae?” 

Taehyung wanted to say that he didn’t know. That they should take time to think about it, that they would find an answer that would solve everything immediately. 

But that would be lying. 

“I think… I think we should break up.” 

He felt Jimin’s tears wetting the back of his shirt. 

“Ok.” 

“Maybe not forever, but—“

“Until we figure it out?”

“Yeah.”

…

“Jimin?” 

“Yes, Tae?” 

“Can we… stay like this?” 

“Sure.” 

☀☀☀

Meanwhile… 

Hoseok couldn’t help but smile. 

In front of him, all his friends, except for Taehyung and Jimin, were seated. They were all in different states of panic, and he was pretty sure it wouldn’t be long until one of them took out a bottle of wine. 

“So,” Jungkook started, playing with his fingers, “are we on the same page?” 

“I think so.” Seokjin looked at Yoongi, who just nodded. 

Namjoon had his arms crossed, but nodded.  

“Good.” Jungkook smiled, his bunny teeth showing. 

Hoseok snorted. “Now you all just have to think of a way to tell them that you all want to date them both.” 

There was a silent pause. 

Seokjin stood up. “I’ll go for the wine.” 

That was when Hoseok lost it and started laughing. 

It was about time his friends got their shit together.

IV. 

How do people rebuild a relationship? That was the question Taehyung and Jimin needed an answer to. Were they supposed to stop seeing each other? Or should they do the opposite and go on dates, just like when they had started dating? Should they try to be just friends for a while?

The weird thing about not being in a relationship was that they never really got to experience anything else before, the only exception being when they literally weren’t together. They had started flirting right off the bat, and the same day they met they made clear that there was something between them. It was always that way. But friendship ? Taehyung had no idea how to do that. 

The clearest example of their awkwardness was what Taehyung had decided to call The Movie Incident . 

It started fairly normal, both of them agreeing to hang out at Jimin’s apartment and watch a movie (a comedy movie, which Taehyung made sure to check did not have any kind or romance before suggesting it). It was supposed to be just that, two friends, sitting on a couch, one foot apart ‘cause they were just friends. 

But nothing that involved Park Jimin could ever be that simple. 

To their credit, they had an excellent start. They put on the movie, made some popcorn, and sat with said popcorn between them. More than half of the movie went like that, no conversation needed. 

Then their hands accidentally brushed while grabbing popcorn. 

Taehyung had stiffened his body, unable to move. Was that too much? Had they made a mistake? Did they need to pretend it never happened? Or should they acknowledge it and then laugh about it?

It was only when Taehyung felt fingers interlacing with his own that his brain went blank. 

Jimin was holding his hand.

Jimin was holding his hand. 

JIMIN WAS– 

Oh, but isn’t that something you do with your friends? 

Taehyung blinked, his body finally relaxing. 

Yeah. Hands holding wasn’t something only boyfriends did, friends could do it as well. It wasn’t anything special. 

Tentatively, Taehyung closed his hand, fingers wrapping around Jimin’s hand. 

His tiny, adorable hands… 

Taehyung’s eyes were fixed on the television in front of him, not daring to even try to glance at his ex-boyfriend. 

Jimin’s tumb started caressing Taehyung’s hand. Taehyung could barely breathe.

“Jimin…”

“Shhh, keep watching.”

Taehyung gulped and continued staring at the movie, but he wasn’t paying attention now. 

Is this really happening? Why is he behaving like this?

He wasn’t sure if Jimin actually intended something or it was all platonic for him. And if he asked, he was risking Jimin telling him that it was, indeed, platonic. It would not only make him feel embarrassed, but it would also shatter his heart and hopes. 

You shouldn’t feel that way. You already agreed to be fri– 

“Can you please shut up for one day,” Taehyung murmured, feeling the beginnings of a headache. He felt Jimin shifting, turning his head in his direction. He moved his hand away from Taehyung.

“Did you say anything?” 

Taehyung pressed his lips together, shaking his head. “I was just… Talking to myself, I guess.” 

Jimin raised an eyebrow, but didn’t comment on Taehyung’s word. 

Five minutes later, he reached for Taehyung’s hand again.

He was ready for it this time, immediately placing their hands together in a position where neither of them would get tired. He also casually kissed the top of Jimin’s hand, before returning, and he heard Jimin’s little mumble. 

“Ah, fuck this.” Taehyung raised his eyebrows, ready to ask what he meant, but Jimin rapidly put the popcorn elsewhere and jumped to Taehyung’s lap. Instinctively, Taehyung’s arm wrapped around Jimin’s body. 

“Jimin, what-?” 

He couldn’t finish his sentence, for Jimin’s lips pressed against his mouth. Taehyung opened his eyes, shocked, but it took Jimin’s hand running against his hair for him to get lost into the kiss. 

It was slow, only lips moving, but Taehyung could feel all the longing it transmitted. When had been the last time they had actually kissed? 

It was during your fight. Remember? When you– 

Didn’t I tell you to shut up for today? 

You can’t shut me up, I am in your– 

Taehyung decided to think about Jimin’s tiny hands, which now were cupping his face, instead of paying attention to whatever his head was trying to make him feel bad about. 

By the time they stopped kissing, the movie had been long finished. 

✩✩✩

Even after that day, they tried the ‘hanging out’ idea a couple more times. It always ended the same way, with both of them making out in some place. For that reason, they decided it would be better to find a new approach. They decided that it was better if, instead of hanging out alone, they could go out with their friends. 

It wasn’t actually their idea, but Yoongi’s. He had just come back after a weekend fishing trip with Seokjin and had invited all of them to eat what they had caught.  It was a nice plan, and it gave Taehyung an opportunity to actually focus on something that wasn’t his ex-boyfriend.

They were all at Seokjin’s apartment, since it was the most spacious one. By the time Taehyung had arrived, everyone was already having fun. He could see Jimin playing some drinking game with Jungkook, both of them with red cheeks that Taehyung really doubted were a product of the alcohol that Seokjin had around. He avoided that place, wanting to have some fun on his own before he actually had to deal with Jimin and him trying to just act like friends. 

The first person he found was Seokjin. 

His hyung immediately greeted him, offering him some glass of wine. 

“You know, it makes you less tense.” He had said, winking at him. Taehyung has just chuckled.

“I don’t know if I want to get myself drunk tonight, hyung. Jimin and I are trying no to… fall into old habits, and you perfectly know that it doesn’t take much for me to get tipsy.” 

Seokjin had just pouted, clearly not liking being rejected. 

“Come on~ Just a drink~” 

Taehyung pressed his lips together. “Ok, but you can’t let me get into any problem, deal?”

Seokjin nodded, already walking him to the kitchen. He took two bottles of something Taehyung didn’t even recognize before they were poured into one drink, which was handed to him. 

“It’s sweet, because I remember you liked sweet things when you were younger.” 

Taehyung smiled. “Thanks, hyung.” 

That was the last thing Taehyung remembered from that night. 

✩✩✩

If the next day he woke up between Jimin’s arms, both of them cuddling, he blamed Kim Seokjin for it.

✩✩✩

Just like that, meeting all of them as a group became more and more common. They usually changed where it was, though, so it never became too much of the same. The same way, Jimin and Taehyung continued with their little game, always trying to get away from each other. They did succeed, eventually, and the experience also helped Taehyung to spend even more time with their other hyungs. 

One day, probably during their third or fourth reunion, Hoseok had suggested that the best way of learning how to live around Jimin without ending up kissing and cuddling, was to extract himself from the center of the party and just observe everyone. In the beginning, Taehyung didn’t understand what Hoseok had meant, until he gave it a try. 

It made him change his view on everyone almost immediately. 

It was amazing, in his opinion, to watch how the others interacted when he wasn’t included. He supposed it was obvious that they were going to behave differently, but he had never expected the dynamic to be as different as they actually were. 

It was even clearer from an outsider’s point of view just how much Jimin had been suffering from his problems with the others. They all tried to ignore it, the same way Taehyung always tried to ignore all the problems he and Jimin had when they talked, but he could still notice the tension amongst all of them. It was clear that Jimin still hadn’t talked to Namjoon or Seokjin, maybe with Yoongi, he wasn’t sure. The only one that seemed almost completely comfortable with Jimin was Jungkook, and even then, Taehyung could still see the longing stares they sometimes shared with each other. 

It broke Taehyung’s heart. 

I wish they all could fix their problems… Jimin truly is at his happiest when he has everyone that he loves around him.

But how could they do that? It’s not just small talk, they probably have to work on a lot of problems by themselves. You can’t be involved in everything. 

… I know. 

Taehyung noticed how Jimin seemed to have noticed he was staring, and he immediately took out his phone and pretended to be playing some game. 

He tried to ignore Jimin’s penetrating stare. 

He didn’t notice another five eyes on him.

✩✩✩

It was around that time, after many nights together, that all of his friends began behaving differently. Not that Taehyung actually had noticed at first, of course. And he could actually be wrong around the timing. But, looking back at the moment… 

If he had to guess, he would probably say it started with Jungkook. 

It hasn’t been on a day out of the ordinary, nor was it a special occasion. No. It happened on a day he and Jungkook had spent just playing videogames. It was, quite literally, as normal and friendly as a hangout could get. 

Except that it wasn’t. 

Sure, the playing part has been normal, with both him and Jungkook getting into the game and yelling and pushing each other, all in the name of competitiveness. But he could notice how, in those moments, Jungkook’s glare would sometimes stay more time that it should have on Taehyung’s eyes, how Jungkook always had a smile on his face, even when it was Taehyung the one that had won the round, how sometimes they would hug, the few moments they played as a team, and Taehyung’s skin would feel warmer, would feel how happiness was all in his head. 

And Taehyung behaved just the same way, even if he didn’t notice it. He would sometimes hug Jungkook when the other was playing, or would try to move Jungkook’s hair out of his face with the excuse that it was so he could see better, no because Taehyung wanted to caress the other’s face. 

It was all just platonic.

(Except that it wasn’t).

(But Taehyung wasn’t ready to admit that. Not even to himself).

“Hyung?” Taehyung blinked, just noticing he had been zoning out again. He turned to face Jungkook, who was still smiling at him, eyes mirroring the happiness they both felt. 

Have his eyes been this shinny all this time? Taehyung wondered.

He moved his fingers, a huge urge of drawing galaxies appearing from nowhere. 

Taehyung licked his lips. “Yes, Jungkookie?” 

“Have you…” Jungkook looked away for a couple of seconds, as if he was thinking of what to say. Taehyung didn’t rush him. “Did you have fun with me? Today?” 

Taehyung smiled. “Why, of course I did. You’re my favorite person to play videogames with.” He got closer, looking at their surroundings, and whispering, he continued: “But don’t tell Jin-hyung. We don’t want to make him angry, ok?”

Jungkook just giggled, not even trying to put distance between them. Taehyung noticed how his cheeks were a little bit red. 

Taehyung’s own cheeks felt warm, too. 

“I won’t hyung. Don’t worry… But you will have to do something for me in exchange”

Taehyung raised an eyebrow, his smile sharper, more like a smirk. “What do I need to do in order to buy your silence?”

“Take me out to eat.” 

Well, Taehyung wasn’t expecting that. And perhaps his face showed that for a bit, for Jungkook opened his eyes after looking at him and became even redder. He immediately stepped back, sitting on the extreme of the couch.

“It’s– It’s only if you want, of course. Not like, you know, I– You’re not– Let’s forget about this? Please?”  The smile had disappeared from his face, and now he looked… Scared. And sad. 

His face is too beautiful to be marked by sadness. 

Well, why don’t you do something about it?

Taehyung got closer to him, cornering him against the arm of the couch. He cupped Jungkook’s face with his hands, making sure they had eye contact. 

He looks like a deer who was just caught by someone . 

“Of course I would love to take you out, Jungkookie. Don’t worry, hyung will pay for our food.” Jungkook didn’t say anything, just nodded, eyes still big. They were shiner now, though. And there wasn’t a drop of sadness present anymore. 

Later that day, as they were eating at one of the restaurants near Jungkook’s apartment, Taehyung jokingly asked him why he hadn’t just asked him on a date, quoting all the times Hoseok had done the same thing. Jungkook hadn’t answered, but he had blushed again, before changing the topic. 

Red was a good color on him. Taehyung wanted to see him like that more often. 

✩✩✩

As Taehyung thought back to that day, he couldn’t understand how he never saw the signals. 

How that was the first time they had crossed that line between platonic and romantic. 

✩✩✩

The changes were not exclusively related to him. Taehyung was aware that this was a change in their whole group’s dynamic, and that it did not revolve around himself. Still, it was certainly an experience to observe those interactions from an outsider point of view. 

It happened on a school day, which shouldn’t have been really surprising, considering that it wasn’t the first time something personal occurred while he was working. But still, as Taehyung walked to Namjoon’s office, he really wasn’t expecting to find Jimin already there. They had left the blinds open, so even when the door was closed, he could perfectly see them.

Namjoon was sitting on his chair with Jimin on his lap, who had his head resting on his cousin’s chest. It seemed extremely intimate, to the point where Taehyung felt like an intruder. He shouldn’t be watching this moment, it wasn’t meant to be shared with anyone. But, at the same time, he was curious. He wanted to know if this meant they had finally talked about their problems.

Taehyung got closer, looking through the small window on the door. From where he was, he couldn’t hear them talking, which meant they were probably whispering to each other. But he could perfectly see their lips. 

Well, almost. He could see Jimin’s lips. The angle wasn’t right for Taehyung to read Namjoon’s. He hoped it was enough for the conversation to make sense. 

[... was wrong. I know that already, Namjoonie]

[...]

[Of course I do. You more than anyone should now that]

[...]

[That’s– different. I didn’t mean to–] 

[...]

[I know, I know. I hurt him. But Tae was–] Taehyung raised an eyebrow. So they’re talking about me? [– in a bad place, and I couldn’t just stay. If I had known he–]

[...]

[You– You don’t mean that, hyung] Jimin seemed pained, and he removed his head from Namjoon’s chest, now looking at him in the eye instead. The new angle made it so Taehyung couldn’t continue reading, but after a couple of seconds, he noticed he didn’t need to. 

Jimin had started crying, and so was Namjoon. They looked at each other and Taehyung just knew they were still communicating, even when words aren't being said out loud. 

They both started getting closer, and it was just a question of seconds before their lips got together. 

Taehyung knew this kind of scene, had seen it a lot before, himself in Namjoon’s position. This was the way Jimin comforted people, was the way he could transmit his feelings so the other could understand. It made Taehyung’s heart ache, remembering all the times Jimin had tried to make him feel better the same way. 

Curiously enough, Taehyung also felt warm inside him, and couldn’t help but smile. He was glad that Namjoon and Jimin were finally fixing things. It makes him feel better. 

It felt like hope, that whatever was going on would be fixed. 

That they would be happier. 

With that thought, Taehyung turned around, walking back to his own classroom.

Neither Jimin nor Namjoon had noticed him, too focused on each other. 

And that was ok.

Maybe there's a way for all of us to be happy , he thought. 

In the end, that was the most important thing for him. Not only for him to be happy, not only for Jimin or Namjoon. He wanted everyone to be happy, all together. 

All together.

For the first time, Taehyung allowed himself to imagine a future that not only consisted of him and Jimin, but included five other people. 

And it felt right.  

✩✩✩

It was a week later, one of the nights they had gathered to have fun, that the beginning of the end started. It was when Taehyung felt a little bit more relaxed, a little bit bolder, that he decided to walk to where Jimin was, sitting beside him. Jimin had smiled at him, automatically reaching for his hand. Taehyung was happy to comply, interlacing their fingers. 

Taehyung giggled, resting his head on Jimin’s shoulder. “Jiminie, hey.”

Jimin started giggling too, putting his arm around Taehyung’s shoulders. “Taehyungie, hi.”

“Are you having fun today, Jimin-ah?” 

“I am.” 

"Good.” Taehyung closed his eyes, as Jimin started playing with his hair. “I wanted you to be happy today.” 

“How could I not be? I am with my Taehyungie.” Taehyung let out another small giggle. 

“Yeah, but I know you love it more when it’s the seven of us.” Jimin didn’t say anything. “Don’t worry, Jimin-ah. I… I’ve been watching you for a long time. You know how different people act depending on who is around them? You act a lot differently when you’re with the others…” He looked at Jimin, smiling.” And I’ve seen you, Jimin. I know, and it’s okay.”

“Taehyung-ah…”

“It’s not wrong to feel.” 

Jimin took a breath.

“I’m scared, Tae.” His voice was barely audible, and Taehyung could hear how it was shaking. 

He snuggled closer to Jimin, wrapping his arms around him. 

“I think we all are, Jimin-ah. But whatever has happened before, and whatever will happen in the future, will not change the fact that you’re the kindest, most beautiful person we all know.” 

“Tae…”

“It’s not big deal.” 

Jimin sighed, and Taehyung could feel his lips pressed against his head. Taehyung smiled.

“I wish you could see yourself the same way we see you, Jimin-ah. Because you deserve all the love in the world. And we are willing to give it to you. You just have to allow yourself to be loved.” 

“I can’t–” 

“I told you once, Jimin-ah, that if someone can’t love you all, they don’t deserve you.” Taehyung could feel himself lighter, and he was already drifting to the world of dreams. “But even if it’s you who doesn’t love yourself, you deserve to be loved. Don’t forget that. The same way you love me for who I am… Love yourself too.” 

Taehyung never got to hear Jimin’s answer, already too deep into his sleep. But he did feel a pair of lips on his forehead, as well as something warm around him. 

✩✩✩

The next time Taehyung woke up, the first thing on his mind was the annual party that his aunt usually organized. Not for the first time, Taehyung wondered if it had anything to do with whatever he had dreamed. 

He wished he could know. 

Taehyung groaned, rubbing his eyes. He didn’t need to think at the moment, he only needed to actually wake up.

And that led him to the second thing on his mind: He wasn’t at home. 

He immediately jumped out of the bed, looking everywhere. The room was full of color, with different figurines and other ornaments. It honestly screamed Hoseok, and Taehyung guessed that was where he had slept. 

But how did I end up at Hoseok’s? 

The last thing he remembered was falling asleep on Jimin’s shoulder, so at least waking up at his ex’s would have made more sense. But why leave him at Hoseok’s? Why not his own place? He knew Namjoon could have perfectly opened the door for them. Damn, even Jimin could have done that. So, why? 

He heard a loud laugh coming from outside the room, and Taehyung immediately followed it. It came from the kitchen, he noticed, but it wasn’t Hoseok’s laugh. It was Yoongi’s. 

So I wasn’t the only one staying here last night? 

As Taehyung approached the kitchen, the voices became louder. He could also hear the intro to some song, even though he didn’t particularly recognize it. It was clear that whatever was happening, it was a source of fun for both Hoseok and Yoongi. But what were they doing? He had never heard Yoongi laughing like that before. Anticipation already running through his body, Taehyung walked into the kitchen. 

He wasn’t sure what he was expecting, but it definitely wasn’t anywhere near what he had actually witnessed.

Yoongi was standing in the middle of the floor, a wooden spoon on hand, in the middle of some weird dance moves. Standing beside him, cellphone as a microphone, was Hoseok. They both had huge grins on their faces, which didn’t flatter even after both of them had turned to Taehyung.

“Tae! You’re awake! Come here~” Hoseok grabbed his arm, dragging him between him and Yoongi. He then grabbed another spoon, this time a plastic one, and handed it to him. “Name a song.” 

“A song?” Taehyung blinked. “What song?”

“Any song! Come one, just do it!” 

“Uhhh.” Taehyung’s mind was suddenly blank. What songs did he like? This was too sudden… “Ugh! I can’t–” 

He was interrupted by Yoongi, who grabbed Hoseok’s phone while handing him the wooden spoon. “‘Ugh’ it is then.” 

He pressed something on his phone, and immediately the sound of a gun shooting resonating everywhere, music following immediately.

Taehyung actually knew the song, which was a relief by itself. He watched Yoongi immediately rapping the first part, moving with the music. Hoseok and Taehyung imitated him. After the song ended, another followed it, and so on. It was nice, and Taehyung couldn’t help but laugh at the exaggerated way they all performed at the time. 

The point wasn’t to sound good , but to have fun instead. 

Now he understood why they had been laughing. Taehyung might have just woken up, but he felt immediately energized just by being there with Yoongi and Hoseok. At some point, Hoseok just started laughing out of nowhere, his contagious giggles making Yoongi and Taehyung laugh as well. 

“I think I haven’t laughed this hard in months,” Taehyung mentioned, sweeping a tear out of his eye. 

“Too bad. You have a nice laugh, Taehyungie” Hoseok ruffled Taehyung’s hair, before looking at Yoongi. “Now, we do need to make some breakfast, hyung. I’m starving.”

Yoongi just stared at him back, pushing his lips out just a little bit. “You only like me for my cooking skills.”

Taehyung blinked, eyes opening in surprise. “Oh my god. Hyung, are you pouting ?!” 

Yoongi immediately pressed his lips in a line, cheeks slightly red. “Yah! Of course I’m not.”

Hoseok pinched Yoongi’s cheek, making Yoongi pout again. “You’re so cute.” 

Taehyung giggled, grabbing Yoongi’s hand and holding it. “Hobi-hyung is right, hyung. You’re cute.” 

“I’m not!” He whined, but it clearly didn’t bother him at all. Taehyung couldn’t help but coo a little. “Why don’t you two start helping me instead of being so annoying.” 

Hoseok put his hand on his forehead in a saluting position, Taehyung imitating him. “Aye aye captain!” 

The next hour passed with all of them teasing each other while cooking, and then eating breakfast. Then, Hoseok moved to the couch, tv remote on hand. 

“You two might as well stay with me today,” he shrugged. “I wasn’t planning on going out at all today anyway.” 

Taehyung chuckled. “Geez, you sure know how to make someone feel special, hyung.” But he was already sitting beside Hoseok. Yoongi sat on the other side, a smile on his face. 

“Why of course. I haven’t been taking all of you on dates for years just for me to be unable to do that” Hoseok winked at him, while putting his arm around Yoongi’s shoulders. 

“How did that start, anyway? Did you just wake up one day thinking ‘wow, I should take my friends on dates’ or something?” 

Yoongi snorted. “Or something.” 

Hoseok just shook his head, but he was clearly endeared. “I met Yoongi-hyung and Namjoonie when I was a freshman in college.”  He started, now looking at Taehyung. “By that time, I already had gone on a couple of dates through high school, even had a girlfriend. It was nice.” He stopped for a second, hand under his chin, while making a thinking face. “The dates were nice, the girlfriend part… not so much. I had already figured out that romance wasn’t my thing at all, even though I didn’t have a name for it. That came later.” He moved his hand, dismissing himself. “But that’s for another day. As I was saying, I didn’t do dating, but I loved going on dates. So, one day in which Namjoon and Seokjin were talking about one date they had gone to, I turned to Yoongi-hyung and said ‘hyung! Can I take you on a date?’”

Yoongi rolled his eyes. “He didn’t say it. He yelled it. Mind you, we were in the library. I think the only reason why the librarian never kicked us out was that she loved Namjoon.” 

Hoseok giggled, nodding in agreement. “Everyone was so confused. I think Yoongi-hyung stared at me for, like, three minutes before actually answering,” 

“I said no, of course.”

“You said, and I quote, ‘Hoba, I don’t like you like that. Let’s continue being friends.” He turned to Yoongi, eyes shining. “I wasn’t even confessing and I got rejected.” 

“How was I supposed to know? You didn’t say ‘Let’s go on a platonic date.’ You said ‘Can I take you on a date?’ And when I told you no, you just laughed instead of explaining!”

“Your face was too funny for me to react any differently!’ 

“You had-!” 

“And what happened then?” Interrupted Taehyung. It wasn’t that he wanted to make them stop bickering, no. It was highly entertaining. But he also wanted to know what had happened.

Yoongi sighed. “After this idiot stopped laughing, he then explained what he meant. I didn’t really have an excuse at the time, and I knew he would make me go even if I had one. So we went on a date… And a lot of others after that. Namjoon and Seokjin-hyung eventually joined us, and in no time we all were having friendly dates. One day, in which Seokjin was with his parents and it was only the three of us, we went to an Eminem concert. I went to a lot of fishing dates with Seokjin-hyung too. It was… nice.”

“Later Jiminie and Jungkookie joined us.” Hoseok took Taehyung’s hand. “And then, you.”

“It’s funny.” Yoongi said, eyes not meeting Taehyung’s or Hoseok’s. “We were never incomplete, you know? It was always just the six of us. We all have other friends, of course, but… Even our ex-partners never really joined the group. Or they were already in the group. And then, you appeared out of nowhere with Jiminie.” Yoongi snorted. “I didn’t even like you, but somehow… Somehow, I can’t imagine my life without you anymore, Taehyung-ah.” 

Taehyung felt like crying, Yoongi’s words making him feel all warm. Hoseok grinned, winking at Taehyung. 

“I told you that Yoongi-hyung would love you.” 

<I’m sure if you get to actually talk to them they would love you>

Taehyung smiled. He was glad Hoseok had been right about that. He, neither, could imagine a life without any of them anymore. 

“But Yoongi-hyung hasn’t said that he loves me yet.” Taehyung crawled to the top of both Hoseok’s and Yoongi’s laps, laying on top of them. He started poking Yoongi’s chest then, looking up to his face. “Hyung, tell me you love me.” 

Yoongi softly slapped Taehyung’s hand. “Yah! Stop poking me!”

“Hyung!” Taehyung whined. 

“Come on, hyung. Taetae just wants his hyung to tell him that he loves him.” 

Yoongi’s cheek turned even redder. “Why don’t you tell him, then?” 

Hoseok giggled, cupping Taehyung’s face with his hands and rubbing his nose with Taehyung’s. It was an awkward position, but neither minded even a bit. “Taehyung-ah, hyung loves you a lot.” 

Taehyung giggled. “I know hyung. I love you too.” 

Hoseok then turned to Yoongi, an eyebrow raised. “Your turn, hyung.” He teased. 

Yoongi just rolled his eyes but, in a similar manner as Hoseok, he hovered over Taehyung, cupping his face as well. This time, Taehyung remained quiet, looking at Yoongi with expectation. Yoongi just caressed his cheek and smiled at him, his tone soft and full of fondness. 

“I love you, Taehyung-ah.” 

Taehyung blushed, but he had a huge smile on his face. 

“I love you too, hyung.”

They both remained silent, just staring at each other, for around a minute. They only stopped when they heard a clicking sound. They both looked at Hoseok, who had a guilty smile, phone on his hands. 

“I’m sorry for ruining the moment, but… You two looked so cute I couldn’t help it.” He showed them the picture. Taehyung hadn’t realized how red both of their faces were, or how close they had stood. He didn’t mind, though. Neither did Yoongi, for him had just rolled his eyes and asked for the picture to be sent to him. 

Taehyung got up from his hyungs’ laps, sitting on his own again. He still had a dopey smile on his face. Hoseok looked at him for a couple of seconds, before announcing that he was going to the kitchen to make some popcorn, leaving him alone with Yoongi. Neither of them said anything for a full minute, lost on their own head. 

It was Yoongi who talked first. 

“Taehyung-ah…” He fidgeted a bit. “What I said… It was serious. I do love you a lot, I think… No, I’m sure, I love you more than just as a friend.” 

And Taehyung believed him. He could feel the sincerity in his tone. He took Yoongi’s hand, smiling at him trying to reassure him as he continued talking. 

“But– It’s not only you.” He continued. “I love you, but so I love Hoba, so I love Jungkookie, so I love–” He gulped. “So I love Jiminie.” 

“I know, hyung.”

“I know that you might not like– What?” Yoongi blinked. 

“I always suspected that you still loved Jimin. After I met you, that is.” Taehyung shrugged. “After I began spending time with you… It wasn’t difficult to figure out that you also loved the others. I just… Never expected that I was included there.” He held Yoongi’s hand. “Until now, that is.” 

“Oh.” Yoongi continued staring at him, now his eyes full of something. Taehyung wasn’t sure if it was happiness, or something else. 

Hope. What you’re seeing is hope, 

“Do you…” Yoongi bit his bottom lip for a second. “Do you feel the same, Taehyung-ah?” 

Taehyung remained silent for a couple of seconds. Did he feel the same? He thought of all the times he spent with Yoongi, with Hoseok, with all of them. All made him feel the same kind of warmth, the same kind of happiness. He got closer to Yoongi, a hand on his cheek. 

“I do.” 

Then, their lips touched. 

✩✩✩

Three minutes later, Hoseok’s happy yell made them jump. Their lips were as red as their faces. Hoseok ignored that, telling them that they should call the others as soon as possible. 

Yoongi and Taehyung just nodded at whatever Hoseok said. 

They were still holding hands.

✩✩✩

The others arrived in less than half an hour, the last one being Seokjin and Jungkook, who had arrived together. By that time, Yoongi was sitting on Taehyung’s lap, his feet on top of Hoseok. If the others had found it weird, no one said anything. 

After they all were in the living room, Hoseok stood up, clapping his hands once. 

“You must be wondering why I’ve gathered you here tonight.” 

Jungkook snorted. “Really, hyung?” 

“Let him talk, Kook-ah,” Namjoon said, chuckling. Jungkook just nodded, curling up to Seokjin’s side. 

Hoseok giggled. “Cute.” Then, he continued. “As I was saying, I’ve gathered you here tonight for a reason. Well, more like an announcement.” 

Yoongi rolled his eyes. “Just get on with it, Hoba.” 

“Shhhh. Let me speak.” Hoseok put his hands together, grinning. “Today, in this same apartment, something extremely important happened.” To add a more dramatic effect, he paused for a couple of seconds. “Yoongi-hyung over here decided to take one for the team and finally confess to Taehyungie.”

Taehyung felt how everyone turned to him, all with different levels of surprise. A weird tension came over all of them, and Taehyung felt like he was in the eye of the hurricane. He let out a nervous chuckle, trying to think of what to say. It was in the middle of an internal debate that Yoongi decided to curl up then, not so different from a cat, while resting his head on Taehyung’s neck, closing his eyes. Taehyung felt himself get calmer. 

“Yeah.” He finally said, looking at everyone. “What happened was…” 

And as he recalled the events of that day, he could see how, slowly, everyone’s faces went from surprise to fondness, if not a bit of nervousness. When he ended, there was silence for a bit. 

Then Seokjin spoke. 

“Well, that was easier than I thought.” 

The effect was immediate, everyone laughing, the tension that was left in the room finally dissipating. 

“Are you okay with all of this, Taehyung-ah?” Asked Namjoon, his hand scratching the back of his own neck. “I… After all that happened, are you sure this is what you want?” 

Taehyung couldn’t help but almost cry at his cousin’s words. If there was someone that had been just as affected by the whole situation beside Taehyung and Jimin, it was Namjoon. He was the one that got to experience most of the problems alongside them, and Taehyung couldn’t have found anyone as caring as Namjoon was. 

He smiled as his cousin. “Don’t worry, hyung. I’m sure.” Then, he scrunched his nose. “Not that I’m attracted to you. That’s disgusting. We aren’t in Westeros here.”

Namjoon seemed to choke on his own saliva, clearly not expecting those words. Still, he started laughing, shaking his head in disbelief. 

“From all the things you could have said, you decided to make a Game of Thrones joke?” He asked, almost in disbelief. Taehyung just shrugged. 

“But you laughed, so it was worth it.” 

Namjoon rolled his eyes, but didn’t say anything. In his place, it was Jungkook who spoke. 

“Hyung, just to be clear… Are you saying that you want to be with all of us?” 

Something in the tone Jungkook used broke Taehyung’s heart. It was a tone of disbelief. But he couldn’t exactly blame Jungkook. The whole situation was crazy. 

If anyone would have told Taehyung two years before that he was going to be considering a relationship with that many people, he wouldn’t have believed it either. And that would be without taking into account how they got there. 

He shook his head. Focus, Taehyung. 

“I am saying exactly that, Jungkookie.” He looked at the floor, absently running his fingers through Yoongi’s hair. “I don’t know how, but… After I actually got to spend time with all of you, well…” He chuckled. “I fell in love somewhere along the way. All of you”

Namjoon cleared his throat, making Taehyung roll his eyes. 

“ Almost all of you.” 

“Still, we haven’t solved our biggest problem,” Hoseok said, looking at everyone with clear mischief. Taehyung wanted to laugh. It was clear that, amongst them all, Hoseok was the one who was having the most fun. 

“What do you mean?” Asked Seokjin. 

Taehyung felt Yoongi moving on his lap, turning to look at Seokjin. 

“Well, that’s easy.” He crossed his arms over his chest. “We still need to talk to Jimin about all of this.” 

And just with that, everyone’s mood plummeted. 

Except for Hoseok’s. Hoseok just started to laugh. 

✩✩✩

They spent the rest of that night trying to figure a way of confessing to Jimin without scaring him away to another country again. They talked about their whole situations, not sparing even a single detail. They understood they needed to consider all their options, no matter how ridiculous or painful it was. 

For starters, they knew that confronting him all together was going to scare Jimin off, if not hurt him even more. How had they all talked about it without including him? It wasn’t like they could just tell him that he was the one most likely to shut them down without even considering their idea (well, no. They could tell him that. But it was obvious for everyone that they shouldn’t ). On the other hand, going oneto-one was a horrible idea too. And who would do it, anyway? Him? 

“Of course it can’t be me,” Taehyung had protested. “He will think I’m just suggesting another open relationship or something.”

“Well, it can’t be me either,” Namjoon argued. “I can’t go ‘Oh hey, do you want to be on a polyamorous relationship with all of your friends? You know, after your last polyamorous relationship ended up hurting you a lot because of me.” 

“I can’t go either, then.” Said Seokjin. “It would be the same thing… Except that Taehyung isn’t my cousin.”

“Can we stop mentioning the part where I am in the same relationship with my cousin?” Taehyung sounded pained. “Like, I get it. We all get it. Why go into semantics? We should never mention it again” 

Seokjin shrugged. “Not my fault it’s funny.” 

“It can’t be Yoongi-hyung or me,” Jungkook said, ignoring the other conflict. “We talked with Jimin and he feels guilty after sleeping with us while we still… ‘hated’ Taehyung.” He coughed a bit. “So that would be messy.”

“If none of us can, then who?” Asked Namjoon. Collectively, they all turned to Hoseok, who at some point in the night had gotten himself a can of Sprite and was watching them like they were the newest comedy on tv. 

He just raised his eyebrows. “Don’t look at me like that. You all are the ones that created this mess, I won’t be the one solving it.” 

“But hyung~” Jungkook whined, making puppy eyes at Hoseok. “You’re the one that isn’t shit with all of this.” 

“That’s because I actually like to communicate my feelings.” He rolled his eyes. “Those eyes won’t help you here, Jeon Jungkook. Stop.” 

But maybe Jungkook was onto something. He stood up, kneeling in front of Hoseok’s seat, his eyes getting bigger and shiner. 

Hoseok’s hand twitched. He was caving. 

Maybe I should help. 

He softly put Yoongi to the side, walking to where Jungkook was and kneeling beside him, making his own puppy eyes. 

“Look at them, Hobi.” Said Seokjin, a huge smile on his face. “How can you tell them no? Is that what you want them to learn? That their hyung isn’t helping them when they are asking?”

Hoseok pressed his lips together. 

“They are going to be so heartbroken if you say no. Could you imagine that?” Added Namjoon. 

Hoseok shook his head. “Stop trying. You know I love them too much, but it’s useless. It won't wor–” 

“Well, you heard him, guys. He doesn’t want to.” Yoongi said, walking to where Taehyung and Jungkook were, putting a hand on both their heads. “It’s obvious that Hoseok won’t help us.”

Hoseok let out his breath, looking like someone had just punched him in the face. “Hyung…” 

“Come one. It’s worthless to even try. His heart is just like stone, of course not even his extremely sad d–” 

“Fine!” Hoseok finally caved. “I will talk to him. Just, stop. Please. ”  

Yoongi was grinning. 

“Good job guys. Hyung will invite you too to eat some lamb skewers.” Taehyung and Jungkook gave each other a high five before going back to their seats. Hoseok stared at Yoongi, betrayal written on his eyes. 

“I can’t believe you all manipulated me like this.” 

Yoongi shrugged. “We didn’t do anything, Hoba. But thank you for helping us.” Yoongi ruffled Hoseok’s hair. “Hyung will pay for your food, too.” 

“You better,” Hoseok mumbled, crossing his arms. 

“We love you a lot, hyung!” Yelled Taehyung, while Jungkook and Seokjin were sending kisses in Hoseok’s direction.

“I know, I know.” Hoseok drank all the sprite that was left on the can, before throwing it in the trash. “Let’s go get this done. You all might not be talking, but you’re coming with me anyway. Then, we will go for food. Ok?” Everyone nodded. Hoseok sighed, frowning. Taehyung got the feeling that maybe, just maybe, they had pushed him too much. But… They needed help, so he believed it had been worth it.

Hoseok grabbed his jacket. “The things I do for all of you.”

✩✩✩

As per Hoseok’s request, they all immediately went to Jimin’s apartment. Taehyung felt like they were in some kind of movie, like they were about to go to the end where everything got solved and the characters lived happily ever after. 

At least, that’s the kind of movie he would like to be part of. He didn’t want an angsty end at all.  He wanted to get the pretty boy (or boys ) and just… to finally end the drama that his life has been for so long. 

As they reached Jimin’s door, Hoseok rang the bell. 

Taehyung could feel anticipation. It was all around them, and it felt like it was suffocating them. 

The sound of approaching steps could be heard from the other side. Behind him, Namjoon inhaled deeply, probably containing the air inside his lungs instead of actually breathing. 

The door started opening, Jimin’s head poking out of it. 

He blinked, surprise clearly showing. He walked out of the apartment. “Guys? What are you doing here?” 

Hoseok smiled at Jimin. “This is called an intervention, Jiminie.”

Jimin’s eyes opened, but before he could do anything, Hoseok had already grabbed his arms and had started walking into the apartment. Taehyung followed him, the others just right behind. Hoseok made Jimin sit on the couch, just in the middle of everyone. 

Namjoon snorted. “We weren’t supposed to corner him, Hobi.” 

“And I wasn’t supposed to be doing this. But if you all want me to be the one talking, then we’ll do it my way. So, do me a favor and shut up.” 

Taehyung opened his mouth in surprise. He wasn’t the only one, though. 

“I’ve never seen Hobi-hyung this mad at us before,” mumbled Jungkook. Namjoon nodded beside him. 

“Kinda hot, though. Right?” Asked Seokjin, wiggling his eyebrows. This made everyone laugh a bit, and for Hoseok to stare at them.

“Am I talking to the walls or what? 

“Go ahead, Hoba,” chuckled Yoongi. Hoseok rolled his eyes. 

“Hyung…?” Asked Jimin, clearly lost. Taehyung felt a bit bad about him. He clearly had no idea what was going on. It wasn’t really fair, but he knew that they needed to solve this sooner than later. And, apparently, Hoseok was the ‘sooner is better’ kind of guy. 

“Jiminie, I’m going to be blunt with you because I’ve been watching all of this go for over a year and after having to deal with these other five idiots today I’m officially tired.” There was something in Hoseok's eyes that made Taehyung want to both hide and apologize. 

Damn, Taehyung thought, hyung is intimidating as fuck when mad. 

It probably was that he was so used to seeing his sunshine hyung 24/7 that not having him put Taehyung (and probably everyone) in shock. Jimin, bei/ng the sole focus of the stare, just silently nodded. 

“Ok, listen. We all have been talking, and yeah, we acknowledge we should have included you earlier but holy fuck, it took them a damn long time to get their shit together. Taehyung found out today too. Well, no. They all talked about it today, Taehyung figured it out on his own first. But whatever, this is not the point.” Hoseok exhaled loudly, probably trying to regain some calm. “These five idiots are not only in love with each other, but they are in love with you. We all know that you love them too so please take me out of this misery and fucking talk to each other and fix this goddamn mess.” He then stepped out, sitting on the couch just beside Jimin. He looked exhausted. “I’m done telling him. Now it’s your turn. Don’t fuck this up, for fuck’s sake.”

Taehyung had never heard his hyung curse so many times in a single day before. Somehow, he found it endearing. But he wasn’t going to say that out loud. 

Not right at that moment, anyway. 

(He also made a mental note to not annoy this particular hyung to this point ever again.)

Seokjin cleared his throat. “We weren’t supposed to say it like that , but… Well, what Hobi said is right. We wanted to… confess?” 

Jimin remained in silence.

“And we all are on the same page here, Jiminie. It’s not different relationships or whatever. It’s just… A single, big relationship that includes all of us.” Taehyung got closer, sitting on Jimin’s other side. Jimin stared at him, still without saying a word. “I know you love them. I’ve seen it multiple times since I met you. And I… I’ve got to fall for them, too.” 

“We know we don’t have the best track at handling all of this.” Namjoon paused for a couple of seconds, frowning a bit. “Hell, I think only you, Seokjin-hyung and I have some experience with non-monogamous relationships. But it doesn’t matter. We want to try anyway.”

Jimin bit his lips, tears accumulating on his eyes. 

“Jiminie…” Yoongi got closer, tenderly ruffling Jimin’s hair. 

Jungkook walked to the back of the couch, hugging Jimin’s neck and putting his head on top of his. He looked like he wanted to cry as well. Hell, Taehyung was sure everyone wanted to cry at this point. “Hyung, please, say something. ”

That was when Jimin broke. 

“ Something? ” He asked, his tone of disbelief making everyone flinch. “You really want hyung to say something? Well, fine. I’ll say something.” He rapidly stood up, making space between him and the men in the room. He didn’t try to escape, though. He just distanced himself. “I think you all are fucking insane for even suggesting something like that.” 

“Jimin–” Yoongi started, but Jimin didn’t allow him to continue. 

“No, hyung. Just let me talk .” He seemed frustrated, angry. But, more than anything, he looked afraid. “You all have no idea of what you’re proposing. Just because we love each other —And yes, I’ll fucking admit that it’s true— doesn’t mean we can be together. A relationship made up of two people is hard enough, not even talking about one with three. And you all are suggesting one made up of seven ! How in the world is that going to work, huh? I’ve dated almost all of you, I know exactly how shitty we all are at communicating. This–” He pointed at everyone. “This would never work.” 

“You can’t just give up without trying!” Taehyung exclaimed, frowning. It was clearly the wrong thing to do, for Jimin seemed to get even angrier. 

“Trying? You, Kim Taehyung, are you going to fucking lecture me about trying ? That was what got us in this mess in the first place! You wanted me to try having sex with other people, and look what happened! We fucking destroyed each other!” Jimin’s voice broke during the last bit, and tears were now falling down his cheeks. 

The worst thing? Taehyung couldn’t even argue against that. 

“That’s not fair,” Namjoon said, in defense of his cousin. Jimin rolled his eyes. 

[3]

“You know what’s not fair, hyung?” Jimin asked, now focusing on Namjoon. “Having people calling you a slut, a whore, a homewrecker just for being in a relationship with two people who were already in a relationship. No, that’s the simplest thing, actually. I was the one who people thought you had gotten with just because I was more ‘petite’ than you two and clearly it made sense for you to get a toy to spend some time with. Just something casual. And that, of course, means that I will accept anyone that offers something in exchange. You know how many times people offered me to participate in threesomes, orgies, or whatever the fuck they wanted just because I seemed to ‘like having two dicks at the time’? I had teachers saying behind my back that I was so promiscuous that I obviously had slept with some of the staff before, if not worse. Two years, hyung. And it didn’t even end after we broke up! It lasted as long as I was in that college. That was part of my reputation, after all. And when I dated Yoongi-hyung? ‘Oh, of course now he’s going after another one of his friends’! And after he moved? ‘Now he’s going to corrupt the youngest one.’ These were all things I heard . They were said to my face. You all have no fucking idea of how difficult this kind of stuff is. What do you think will happen at our job when the parents find out that not only children’s teachers are gay, but that they’re dating more than one person at the time? Huh? Did any of you think how all of this could affect your lives? And what are your families going to say about all of this? This is all just–” 

[3E]

At some point, while he was talking, Seokjin had gotten closer to Jimin, wrapping his arms around his body and tightening in a hug. Jimin had stopped talking, sobs full on. Jimin’s leg started trembling, and Seokjin manoeuvred him so they could sit on the floor, still hugging. 

“ Shhh. It’s ok, Jiminie, ” he had whispered, running his fingers from Jimin’s hair to his lower back, soothing him. “ Let it all out.”

“ H-Hyung… “ Jimin’s voice sounded so… fragile, it broke Taehyung’s heart into millions of pieces. “ I d-don’t… I don’t want all of that to happen again. Not to me, not to any of you. ”

“ Don’t worry about that… We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it. ”

Jimin continued crying for what Taehyung felt like an eternity. Every sob felt like a new punch to Taehyung’s face. He felt useless. How could have he never realized just how… hurt Jimin was from his previous relationships? He looked around, and everyone seemed in a similar state. Even Hoseok, who was probably the most innocent of all of them, was crying silently. 

It was emotionally draining. 

Jimin eventually calmed down enough to continue talking, but he didn’t move from Seokjin’s embrace. Not that Seokjin seemed to want any different. 

“I know that you all are right. We do love each other. But… How could this work? Is it love enough in order to maintain all of this?”

“We don’t know, hyung.” Jungkook murmured. He approached Taehyung, hugging him. If he was trying to give or receive support, Taehyung wasn’t sure. “But.. we want to try.” 

Jimin sighed, letting out a small laugh. 

“Try, huh?” He asked, looking at the other. “Fine. Let’s try.”

V. Epilogue 

A little over a year and a half later… 

Taehyung wanted nothing but to jump out of the car right now. 

“Tae, calm down. It’s not gonna be that bad.” Jimin consoled him, holding his hand. Taehyung shook his head. 

“It’s not gonna be bad…” he murmured. “It’s gonna be worse than bad.”

“Aren’t you exaggerating a bit?” Asked Jungkook, both his hands busy driving the car they all were in. “It’s not some important interview or anything. We’re just going to your aunt’s party. We already know part of your family.” 

“I’m with Taehyung on this, actually,” Seokjin said. “I remember these parties back before Namjoon started college. Their relatives are lovable, but they’re also… a lot.” 

“That’s a way to put it.” Murmured Namjoon. He looked just as nervous as Taehyung, if not worse. 

“Also, you only know our immediate family as our friends. This time we are going to introduce you all as our boyfriends .” Taehyung groaned, hiding his face on his hands. “Namjoon-hyung, why are we doing this again?”

“We can still go back.” Suggested Namjoon. Yoongi rolled his eyes. 

“We are almost there. We won’t turn around now.” 

“Easy for you to say,” Namjoon argued. “You’re not the one that has to explain to their family members not only that you have more than one boyfriend , but that they are your cousin’s boyfriends as well.” 

“I don’t think I even have told them that I like men.” Taehyung put his hands down. “Jungkookie, please, turn around. ” 

“Kook-ah, do not– ” Yoongi started, before Hoseok put a hand on his shoulder. 

“They’re right, hyung. This is going to be difficult for all of us, but it’s their family. It’s going to be worse for them.” He looked at both Taehyung and Namjoon with a smile, like he was reassuring them that everything would be fine. 

Taehyung’s chest filled with a little bit of hope. 

“But we’re not going back. I won’t allow you two to run from your problems.”

Hope? Nevermind. There was no hope in the world. Only betrayal.

His feelings must have been shown on his face, for Jimin started laughing at him. “That was so mean, hyung. Now Tae looks like you just ate all his strawberries.” 

Hoseok ruffled Taehyung’s hair. “I’ll promise hyung will buy you all the strawberries you want after we go back. But now, you need to do this, Taehyungie.” 

Taehyung could already see the landscape of what had been his childhood’s city. He sighed. 

“Fine. But I’m not going to be happy about it.” 

Hoseok chuckled, nodding.

“Come on, guys,” Jimin said. “What’s the worst thing that can happen?”

He just hoped Jimin hadn’t sealed their destiny with those words. 

✩✩✩

The first thing that happened as soon as Jungkook parked at Taehyung's aunt’s house was for said aunt to run out of the building to greet them. 

“My boys! You’re already here!” She immediately hugged Namjoon, being the one the closest. “And I see you brought your friends!” 

Namjoon coughed a bit, muttering a small Yeah, friends, before his aunt released him and walked to where Taehyung was, hugging him as well. 

“It’s nice to see you, aunty,” Taehyung said, and he meant it. He really loved not only his aunt, but his whole family. But the nervousness kept him from actually enjoying seeing his family again. As they broke the hug, Taehyung put a hand on his aunt’s shoulders, now facing his boyfriends. “Aunty, these are my b– friends. My friends. Guys, this is my aunt Yonja.” 

Seokjin was the first one to come forward, grabbing his aunt’s hands and winking. “It’s nice to see you again, Yonja-ssi. Are you aging backwards? You seem even younger than the last time I saw you, and it’s been a decade.” 

Taehyung’s aunt started laughing, shaking her head. 

“Kim Seokjin! How dare you forget me for so long? I don’t care that you broke up with my nephew, you could have come and visited me! I like you more than any of them, anyway.” She winked at all of them, and Taehyung could see Namjoon laughing as bad as he was. 

Oh, how he loved his aunt. 

“Aunty, you can continue flirting with Seokjin-hyung later. Why don't we go in so you can meet our other… friends? It would be easier for us to just introduce everyone once.” 

His aunt just crossed her arms, snorting. 

“Sure thing. Both your parents are there already, as well as your cousins. You’re the last ones to arrive.” 

“It’s not our fault that we are the only ones living hours away,” murmured Namjoon, already walking toward the house. 

“We’re sorry, aunty. But we are seven in a car, we needed to drive slower too. You don’t want your favorite nephews to have an accident, do you?” Asked Taehyung, opening the door for everyone. He could already hear everyone laughing inside. 

So, this is actually happening. 

“Of course I don’t want anything to happen to you, you brat. But I can still annoy you about it.” 

His aunt walked into the living room, most of his family there. He couldn’t see his nor Namjoon’s parents, but he could hear even more noise from the kitchen, so he guessed they were there. With Namjoon, he immediately started every single relative he had. Eventually, his aunt brought their parents, Taehyung quickly hugging them. When was the last time he had talked to either of them? He couldn’t even remember. 

“Taehyung-ah!” Exclaimed his mother, hugging him. Taehyung could feel himself smile. 

“Eomma! I’ve missed you a lot” 

“Of course you have, you haven’t called in weeks! Is that the way to treat your own mother?” She cupped Taehyung’s face, pretending to be angry. Taehyung’s father approached them, hugging Taehyung as well. 

“Damn, Taehyung’s father must have some strong ass genes.” He heard Jungkook say, and that was like a wake-up call for Taehyung. 

Right, boyfriends. 

He turned to his boyfriends, seeing them just standing near the door, probably waiting for a proper introduction. Taehyung felt a bit bad for them. No one ever liked being introduced to such a large family... Except for Seokjin. Seokjin was already greeting the Kim family like he was one of them. Taehyung guessed he was, despite his long absence. He had the upper hand there, having met all of them already. 

Namjoon’s father approached Seokjin, hugging him. Namjoon’s mother followed right behind.

“When Namjoonie said he was bringing some guests, I didn’t expect to see you again.” Said his uncle. 

His aunt nodded. “We hoped it would be you, but… It’s been so long that we weren't sure.” 

Seokjin smiled at both of them. “Don’t worry, I won’t let Namjoon get rid of me again.” 

“Hyung, I know you love my family, but we do need to present the others.” Namjoon intervened. He quickly hugged his parents, though. Then, he walked to where the others were, Taehyung and Seokjin following them. 

Taehyung clapped his hands, getting everyone’s attention. “Hi! I know all of you are wondering who Namjoon-hyung and I brought this year.” 

“Finally! We missed Seokjin-hyung!” One of Taehyung’s young cousins yelled. Taehyung rolled his eyes. 

“Ignoring Seokjin-hyung , which all of you already know, these are Jung Hoseok, Park Jimin, Min Yoongi, and Jeon Jungkook. They all are… really important to us, so please don’t be so hard on them.”

Namjoon nodded. “We know it’s weird to bring so many people, but bear with us, ok?” 

“Not that we are against bringing friends,” Taehyung’s mother said, raising one eyebrow, “but it’s surprising that you brought them instead of… Some partners .” 

Namjoon nervously laughed, and it was so painfully fake that Taehyung wanted to hit himself. 

“So, about that…”Taehyung started.

“They’re all our boyfriends.” Namjoon blurted. 

Taehyung could see how every single member of their family looked at them like they had two heads, all of them with different levels of confusion in their faces. On the side, he could see all their boyfriends flinching. 

There was silence for about five minutes before an alarm started ringing in the kitchen. His aunt Yonja sighed, already walking there. 

“The food is ready. Why don’t you all set the table and… explain what exactly you meant?” 

All of them nodded, while silently moving to help.

He already knew this was going to be a long night. 

✰✰✰

As everyone worked, Taehyung could feel the way everyone stared at them. He understood, really. They had just dropped a bomb on their families. But still, he couldn’t feel but to feel like some outcast amongst his own family. The worst thing is that he didn’t know how his boyfriends were taking it, either. As much as he wanted, he couldn’t just guess their thoughts, especially when he couldn’t focus on all of them and his family at the same time. It was overwhelming. 

He felt someone grabbing his hand, which made Taehyung face the person. It was Jimin, who was giving him an encouraging smile. To his other side, Yoongi also appeared. 

“Don’t worry,” whispered Jimin, “we’ll sit beside you. Kook and Hobi will sit with Namjoon-hyung, and Seokjin-hyung will be in the middle. We agreed that would be the best.” 

Taehyung absently nodded. That sounded like a good idea. 

As the food was served, and everyone made themselves comfortable, his aunt Yonja gave them a look. 

“So… Can any of you explain what is this of all of you being boyfriends?” 

“It’s… literally that, aunty.” Namjoon said. “We are together in a relationship.”

His mother frowned. “So Taehyung and you…” 

Immediately, both Namjoon and he choked. As they tried to recover, Hoseok took the opportunity to talk. 

“It’s not that. Taehyung and Namjoon are not involved in that way. They just happen to… be in a relationship with the same people?” Hoseok groaned. “There’s no way of making this sound normal , so please just… let us explain.” 

It was almost surreal, for Taehyung to see how all his boyfriends explained not only what had happened not only during their relationship, but what happened even before that . They had explained everything from Namjoon’s college years to today, just so their family could understand where they were coming from. 

(Well, almost. They all refused to include any detail that was too personal. Taehyung was glad that he didn’t need to be in charge of the whole explanation, spending most of it hiding his face on Jimin’s neck instead.)

He wasn’t sure how long it all had taken, but he felt exhausted by the time they finished. There was silence again, everyone processing what they had just heard. 

His aunt Yonja sighed. 

“Well,” she said, “can’t say I’m not… surprised, to say the least.”

Taehyung felt his heart stop. All his family always tended to follow his aunt Yonja’s example, so if she said that she wasn’t ok with everything… 

Taehyung knew his family wouldn’t react differently. 

“Aunty…” Namjoon began, but his aunt continued talking, ignoring him.

“I have never heard of anything like this before, and I have lived for way longer than anyone here today.” She paused for a couple of seconds, looking at both Taehyung and Namjoon. She seemed to be thinking carefully about what she was saying. “That being said… I think both Taehyung and Namjoon are old enough to make their own decisions. If this is what they want, as their aunt, then I will accept it. I told this to Namjoon and Seokjin the first time they appeared together in my house, but it still is as true as it was all those years ago.” Now she was smiling at all of them, eyes as full of love as always. “Life is too short to torture someone just for who they love. And I love my nephews way too much for this to make any difference.” 

Taehyung felt himself crying. He immediately stood up and ran to where his aunt was, hugging her as tight as he could without hurting her. Namjoon followed in just seconds. 

He couldn’t believe it was actually happening. 

“Thank you, aunty.” Murmured Namjoon. Their aunt kissed both of their foreheads, smiling. 

“It’s ok, boys.” She pushed them away a bit, now looking at the others. “I’ll try not to think about all of this too much as long as all of you are happy. But if you don’t take care of my nephews, I won’t hesitate to hunt every single one of you down. Even you, Seokjinie.” 

Seokjin started laughing. “I wouldn’t expect any less of you, aunty.” 

“Good.” She clapped her hands. “Now, everyone should go and mingle. I’ll bring dessert.” 

✰✰✰

After that first night, everyone went easier than Taehyung expected. 

Even with his aunt’s approval, Taehyung still expected some resistance from his family. Surely, everything couldn’t go so well, right? But despite him expecting the worse, that hadn’t been the case at all. 

All his boyfriends had blended really well with his family, always finding some common ground. Hoseok, after mentioning that he was a dance teacher, was currently teaching some of the youngest in the family different idol dances. Jungkook wasn’t so different, talking about photography with two of Taehyung’s cousins. Jimin was talking with Namjoon’s parents about who knows what with Yoongi giving his opinion every so often. Unsurprisingly, Seokjin was with his aunt Yonja, and even though Taehyung couldn’t hear what they were saying, he could still see them visibly laughing every few seconds, so he guessed they were fine. 

Then there was Namjoon, who had gone outside for fresh hair just a few minutes ago. 

Maybe I should go with him for a bit.

He had been listening to his mother rambling about one of his brother’s latest achievements (He got accepted to college! Taehyung was proud) when he excused himself, saying that he wanted to extend his legs for a bit. His mother nodded, going for someone else to talk to. Meanwhile, Taehyung walked out of the house. 

Despite how dark it was outside, Taehyung could clearly see his cousin sitting on the grass, contemplating the moon. 

Taehyung sat beside him. 

“Everything went better that we could have expected, huh?” Namjoon asked, without looking away from the moon. 

Even though he knew his cousin couldn’t see him, taehyung nodded. “I still can’t believe aunty took it so well… I expected, I don’t know, at least some cursing at us, you know?” 

“I know.” Now Namjoon was smiling. “We have an amazing family, Taehyung-ah.”

“We truly do.” 

They remained in silence for a couple of minutes, enjoying each other’s companies as well as the nature that surrounded them.

Then, Taehyung started laughing. Namjoon looked at him with a raised eyebrow, clearly confused, but he was smiling. 

“What are you laughing at?” 

Taehyung looked at him, still giggling every so often. “You’re a liar, hyung.” 

Namjoon blinked, clearly not expecting that. “Am I?”

“Yes, you are!” Taehyung’s smile was big, showing all his teeth. “Remember that day we fought at the school? The day we were working on the finals?” 

“Yes...?”

“That day you told me that you wouldn’t date Jiminie again, but you are!” He playfully hit Namjoon on the arm. “So you’re a liar!”

Namjoon chuckled, clearly amused at his cousin’s antics. “Ah, yeah. I think my exact words were that ‘I would never try to get back with him regardless of his relationship with you.’” He shrugged. “What can I say? I did try to not go back with him, but I guess life wanted something else.” 

“I will never let this go, hyung. I’ll remind you of it forever. ”

“Yeah, yeah. I know you will.” Namjoon stood up, shaking off all the dirt and leaves that got stuck on his clothes. He extended a hand towards Taehyung. “Come one, we should go back.” 

Taehyung smiled. 

“Yeah,” he said. “Let’s go with our boyfriends.”

… It had its good things and its bad things but, in the end, what mattered is that they had found love. 

[1] Basically, Taehyung thinks that the only way he could "fix" his relationship with Jimin is by having sex with him. He clearly isn't in the right headspace to make that decision, and he knows that it isn't what he personally wants. His own body rejects the idea. But he tries anyway. Jimin does stop him though, and Taehyung breaks down. [1E]

[2] Taehyung spent days without eating or drinking water in shock. When he is given wood and water, it doesn't sit well on his stomach and he vomits. Seokjin, who is narrating at that moment, sees that and vomits as well (in the bathroom). [2E]

[3] Jimin's experiences during his relationship with Seokjin and Namjoon. Both his classmates and some teachers insulted him a lot, calling him degrading names and sexually harassing him. [3E]