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Ming has been a palace guard for a long time. Like, since Fire Lord Zuko was a young child, kind of long.
Because of this, Ming has had the pleasure and horror of watching Zuko grow up from afar. He remembers Zuko as the kind and gentle child that ran the halls looking for his mother, and he watched as that kindness and gentleness were slowly stomped out of him by his father. He remembers watching as Zuko’s face became more and more withdrawn and closed off as the days went by, and remembers thinking, clear as day, Ozai is going to kill this child if he’s not careful. Now, Ming knows that Ozai had not cared one bit about what happened to his oldest child, and in fact, had hoped for him to die.
During his time as a guard, Ming had seen the very worst that Fire Lord Ozai had to offer, and it was not pleasant. Ming was never a bodyguard for the Fire Lord or part of his personal security, and Ming is forever grateful that he turned down the position all those years ago. (At the time, he had declined under the guise of his mother being ill, and not being able to take the extra hours due to caring for her. But deep down, Ming knew that he would not give his life for Fire Lord Ozai, and would never put himself in the position. His denial had been met with a demotion and that was fine by him.) For a long time, Ming had silently watched on as his Fire Lord committed atrocity after atrocity all in the name of “greatness”. Watched as the world burned around him and he silently prayed for the Avatar and his followers to succeed.
When Prince Zuko had returned, winning the title of Fire Lord from his half-deranged sister, Ming, and the other guards had no idea of what to expect. Would Zuko fire all of them and start fresh? Would they be banished? Punished for following Ozai? For days to follow, the entire staff walked on eggshells, unsure of where exactly they all stood with the new Fire Lord. Ming himself was sure that what he remembered of Zuko as a child was no longer accurate. And for those short few weeks that Zuko had returned to the Fire Nation with his sister, Zuko had spent so much of his time alone that anyone had hardly seen him, much less enough to gauge how he had grown as a person.
Not long after Zuko is crowned Fire Lord, General Iroh sets about finding a new guard protection detail for Zuko, full of people the old war general trusts to protect his nephew. Slowly, the staff who still wholeheartedly support Ozai and his beliefs, those who pose a threat to their still recovering Fire Lord, are being weeded out. While this is happening, the entire staff is being reinterviewed by General Iroh himself, along with the help of the Avatar’s earth bending teacher. (She’s a child, just a child, holy hell why are so many children so involved in this war? Ming wants to wrap them all up in blankets and never let them see another second of violence for the rest of their lives.) Word gets around that somehow (Ming is positive the little earth bending girl spread the rumor herself) the earth bending girl, Toph, can tell when people are lying, and so this skill is used to find the staff members that still support Ozai and send them on their not-so-merry way.
So Ming is caught off guard, but not surprised when General Iroh and Toph ask to speak to him privately. It seems like General Iroh has been going through everyone’s files and has noticed that Ming passed on an opportunity to become one of Fire Lord Ozai’s personal guards. Being a personal guard to the Fire Lord is seen as one of the highest honors in the Fire Nation, and it’s not every day that someone declines that honor.
(“I would just like to know why,” General Iroh says. “And the truth, please, whatever that may be.”
Ming tells General Iroh what he had told his supervisor at the time about his mother’s illness, and his inability to accept due to the change in hours. Iroh nods, turning his attention to Toph. Ming suddenly has the suspicion that the rumor of the girl being a walking lie detector may be true after all.
“He’s telling the truth,” she says. “Kind of. There’s definitely more he’s not saying.” Ming allows his jaw to drop, because damn, what the hell? Both General Iroh and Toph give Ming a look, so Ming finds himself spilling his guts to them.
Ming tells them, hushed and quiet, that he did not and could not approve of Ozai’s actions, and knew he would not try and protect Ozai should the situation call for it.)
The next day he’s asked if he would like to be one of Fire Lord Zuko’s personal guards. He says yes, and quickly learns that beneath all his bluster, the fundamentals of Fire Lord Zuko have not changed much since he was a child. He is quick to anger, yes, and is loud, yelling more often than speaking. But as quick as the anger comes, it also dissipates, replaced with kind words and calm gestures. Ming sees in his first few days following Fire Lord Zuko around, that he only yells at the generals and administrators that try and convince him to continue the war, and even then, he attempts calm first. Ming never once sees Zuko yell at or snap at a staff member, in fact, he’s always very quiet around them, only offering “hello”s and “thank you”s until some of the staff are comfortable enough around him that he begins to offer small talk as well.
Ming isn’t exaggerating even a little bit when he says he would both die for and kill for Fire Lord Zuko in a heartbeat.
(“Honey, please don’t actually die for the Fire Lord,” his wife Heli says to him once. “Kill for him, sure, and protect him, but please, don’t go dying on me anytime soon.”
Ming just hums in response because Zuko is the best thing that has ever happened to the Fire Nation, and damn it, Ming feels all sorts of protective over his teenage leader. Maybe it’s that he has two children of his own around Zuko’s age, but Ming knows he would take down anyone who threatened Fire Lord Zuko.)
Ming didn’t think he’d have to put his conviction to the test so soon, however.
It happens about three months into Zuko’s reign as Fire Lord. Zuko is spending the evening in his office going through his plethora of paperwork and trying to make a dent in it before he goes to bed for the night. Ming is posted outside his office door next to another guard, keeping watch on the hallway, but mostly keeping an ear out for noises in the Fire Lord’s office. All in all, it’s a quiet evening. The staff is going about their duties, gently talking amongst themselves, something that never would have happened under Ozai. The palace grounds are fairly quiet as well, with only the sounds of stray animals wandering around the premises and being fed scraps by some of the servants and kitchen staff.
Suddenly, Ming hears a crash coming from inside the Fire Lord’s office, quickly followed by a shout and the sounds of a scuffle.
Ming and his co-guard spring into action, bursting into the room to find Fire Lord Zuko locked into a fight with three masked figures. It’s clear just from a second of looking that Zuko is overwhelmed; caught off guard, tired from weeks with little sleep but plenty of stress, and coming off the tail end of his life-threatening injury courtesy of his own sister, it’s no wonder that Zuko is struggling now. Ming doesn’t hesitate before jumping into the fray, throwing a fireball at the chest of the attacker closest to Zuko, and throwing another at a second figure. His co-guard is doing the same, making room for Ming to push Zuko away and towards the door, where more guards are rushing in from the commotion.
All in all, the fight is over quickly. The assassin that Ming hit with a fireball in the chest is dead, and the other two are quickly apprehended. ( Assassins, Ming thinks, slightly hysterically. He’s barely 17 and has only been Fire Lord for months, do people really hate peace so much that they’re willing to send assassins after children?!) Ming hears them already selling each other out as they are taken down the halls and into the cells beneath the palace to be questioned later. Ming turns around to look at Fire Lord Zuko, and only sees the blood on his arm for a second before he is rushing his Fire Lord to the infirmary, ignoring his protests and exclaims of “I’m fine, really, it’s barely a scratch.”
The head nurse confirms this, saying that it’s a small laceration at best, and doesn’t even need sutures. Ming steadfastly ignores Zuko’s mumbling of “I told you it was fine, honestly.” and walks with Zuko to his bedroom, where he stays for the rest of the night.
So, Zuko is uninjured save for the small laceration on his upper arm that definitely could have been worse.
It could have been worse, but it shouldn’t have happened at all.
Ming spends the next few days practically glued to Zuko’s side, refusing to let him be alone in any room. He can tell that Zuko is only barely putting up with his behavior, and for the most part, gives in ungracefully with loud sighs and small eye twitches. However, it’s when Ming tries to follow Zuko into his bedroom one night after a stressful day, that Zuko draws the line.
“Ming, really, I appreciate your concern, and understand where it comes from, but I’m fine, really,” Zuko says, exasperated. He keeps his voice level, though, and doesn’t snap at Ming even though he probably really wants to.
“Okay,” Ming says. “But what if you just let one of us stand guard on your balcony? You won’t even know we’re there and then no one can come in through there.”
Zuko’s eye twitches even more. “Absolutely not,” he says, pinching his nose. “No one is standing guard in my room. The closest you’re getting is outside the door like you’ve always been. No one needs to be on the balcony. That’s why we have guard towers.”
“But sir, it’s entirely possible for someone to sneak past the towers,” Ming tries to argue.
“No one has managed to sneak past the guard towers for years,” Zuko states. Ming ignores that fact.
“A group of people managed to sneak into the palace and attack you, Lord Zuko. You could have been killed!”
“Ming,” Zuko sighs. “People have come closer to killing me on accident than those people did to kill me on purpose. And I sincerely doubt anyone would try again so soon.”
Ming stands in shock over Zuko’s blase attitude over literally being killed for Spirit’s sake. “That definitely doesn’t make me feel any better.”
“Ming, I understand that it’s your job to protect me,” Zuko says softly. “And you’ve done exactly that. When the situation called for it, you performed your duty exceptionally. But people have been trying to kill me my entire life, and I’m still alive. I’m more than capable of taking care of myself.”
Ming opens his mouth to try and argue, but Zuko starts speaking once again, “You do more than enough already. It’s not solely your duty to guard the Fire Lord.”
Ming sighs and takes a step back, holding his hands up in surrender. “Fine, but I’m talking to the tower guards and telling them to add a spotter focused on watching your balcony and window. At least for a while.”
“Definitely don’t need to do that, but if it’ll stop you from trying to come into my room with me, then fine,” Zuko says, turning to enter his room.
Ming only has a moment to feel satisfied with himself before Zuko says, “Besides, what kind of Fire Lord would I be if I didn’t fight off a few assassination attempts,” before closing the door to his room.
Spirits help me, Ming thinks desperately, This boy is just inviting trouble his way.
That won’t stop Ming from being by his side for all of it.
Hana had only been working in the palace for a short time. She was hired, not long after Fire Lord Zuko took the throne, to help care for the various gardens around the palace. She had applied in the first place because her uncle was a recently retired guard, who had told her story after story of Fire Lord Zuko’s kindness towards the staff and how different he was compared to his father and sister. Hana had been skeptical at first; as far as she was concerned, everyone in that family was batshit crazy. It wasn’t until her uncle retired (without a single problem or inconvenience, she might add) and the next day they received a basket of fruit at the house, with a handwritten note from the Fire Lord himself wishing her uncle a long and relaxing retirement, and encouraging him to write if he and his family ever required assistance.
Her uncle hadn’t even seemed surprised at the gift or the note, only saying, “I was wondering why he was asking what types of fruit were my favorite, and if I wanted one last bonus before I left.”
So Hana had almost immediately applied to work as a groundskeeper, citing her experience with farming and the family flower shop as her experience and expertise. After a brief interview with the head groundskeeper, she was hired. Since she was still new, Hana spent most of her time going from garden to garden and pulling weeds or watering the plants, sometimes planting new ones. More often than not, she did her work alone, only occasionally accompanied by another gardener. This was fine by her, it was mindless work, and work she enjoyed and was good at.
Hana had met Fire Lord Zuko once when she first started working at the palace. It was her second day, and she was in one of the gardens on the west side of the palace. At the time she had been kneeling down, pulling some weeds, when a shadow fell over her.
“Excuse me,” the voice said. “You’re Hana, correct?”
Hana turned around, the ‘yes’ on her tongue before she realized who was in front of her. She gasped and quickly bowed her head low. “Fire Lord Zuko,” she said quietly. “Yes, I’m Hana. How can I help you?”
“Ah, please stand, there’s no need for that,” he said. Hana thought he sounded a bit uncomfortable. Hana cautiously stood, keeping her head bowed slightly. “I just wanted to introduce myself. Your uncle had told me his niece had been thinking of applying to work in the gardens, so I thought I would introduce myself.” Fire Lord Zuko was awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck and a slight blush crawled up his cheeks.
Oh my Spirits, Hana thought. Our Fire Lord is adorable.
“It’s a pleasure, Fire Lord Zuko,” Hana said honestly. “My uncle spoke very highly of you, and if I may be so bold, I could tell he meant it. So I’m very excited to be working here.”
The blush on Fire Lord Zuko’s cheeks deepens a bit. “Oh,” he says. “Well, I am honored that your uncle enjoyed his time here. I hope you will as well.”
Hana bows at the waist, says, “The honor is all mine, sir,” and watches as her Fire Lord bows his head to her, gives her a soft smile, and walks back into the palace.
That’s it, Hana thinks, He absolutely needs to be protected.
Hana doesn’t see Fire Lord Zuko again for a few months. It’s not like she expected to see him often, and some part of her is grateful that she doesn’t see him. Everyone in the palace knew of the assassination attempt from a few months ago, so Hana finds it reasonable that Fire Lord Zuko no longer spends as much time outside in the gardens where everything is more open. The attempted assassination had spooked all of them, and everyone had been a little more on edge since it happened. (She’d heard that the head guard Ming had nearly had a conniption over it and practically drove Zuko crazy with how overbearing he was being). So, Hana is surprised to walk into a garden near the back of the palace one day and find Fire Lord Zuko sitting by the turtleduck pond with his head buried in his hands.
At first, Hana contemplates leaving and going to another garden and letting Fire Lord Zuko have his space. She didn’t notice any of his guards on her way here, so she guesses Zuko either gave them the slip, or he told them to leave him be. Zuko also didn’t look up or seem to notice her appearance, which seems unlike him. Hana tries to take a closer look at his face, but she’s unwilling to get much closer and disturb him, and most of his face is covered by his hands anyway. Hana eventually decides to stay for a bit. Compromising that she’ll just water the plants that need looking after, take note of how many weeds there are, and plan to come back later in the day when Zuko is gone and finish her duties.
It’s as she’s walking near the back of the garden, a bit closer to Fire Lord Zuko, that she hears the muffled crying coming from his direction. Hana freezes, looking towards Fire Lord Zuko but he seems to be in the exact same position as before. Hana fights with herself over whether to leave and pretend none of this ever happened, or go over and ask him what’s wrong.
Fuck it, she thinks, heading over to Fire Lord Zuko. She stops a few paces away from him, and it’s clear to her that he’s crying now, and he still hasn’t noticed her.
“Fire Lord Zuko,” Hana says quietly. Zuko jumps, head snapping up to see her and Hana jumps as well in surprise. Now that she can see his face, Hana notices the tear tracks and his flushed cheeks and still watery eyes.
“Hana,” Zuko says. His voice is raspy and hoarse and breaks just saying the two syllables that are her name. He quickly rubs at the tears on his face, trying to hide the evidence. Hana’s heart breaks a little. “I didn’t notice you were here.”
“I didn’t mean to bother you,” Hana is still speaking quietly, afraid to spook him. “I just wanted to ask if you were okay? Or if you need anything?”
Zuko is already shaking his head before she finishes speaking. “No, no thank you. I’m all right really. I guess I just had a bit of a weak moment.” Zuko shakes his head again and ducks his head as if avoiding her eyes. He looks almost disgusted with himself. Unacceptable, Hana decides.
“I can’t imagine that being the Fire Lord is a very easy job,” Hana says. “It seems perfectly reasonable to be overwhelmed sometimes.”
“I appreciate that,” Zuko says, his voice is still too shaky for Hana’s liking. As if he could still burst into tears at any second. “But, I am the Fire Lord, I’m not supposed to show any weakness. I have to be strong for my people.”
“Well, my mother always used to say that even the strongest of us need to learn how to bend, otherwise we’ll just snap when under too much pressure. Perhaps this is just a ‘bending’ moment,” Hana says. She wants to make it clear to him that she sees no ‘weakness’ in this.
Zuko just hums at her, attempting to take a deep breath but it just comes through shaky. His eyes well with tears again, and Hana can see him fighting for control over them.
“Of course,” Hana says, kneeling down next to him by the water. “I don’t know what it is that was the tipping point for this. And, I’m sure I’m not exactly qualified to know, but I’m going to go ahead and guess that it’s something to do with ruling an entire nation after just coming off an assassination attempt?” Hana is going for a lighthearted tone of voice, despite the seriousness of the words. It works, by any degree, and a snort of laughter is shocked out of Fire Lord Zuko.
“Something like that, yes,” he says, his breathing is a bit steadier now. “I’m trying to figure out how to redistribute our budget. Far too much of our money is being funneled into the military, and not nearly enough is going everywhere else. Some of my advisors and generals still don’t exactly agree with my ‘peace politics’, so it’s making discussing things harder. We’re still working on making reparations to the other nations, and those negotiations are long and more stressful than anything else. And yes, the whole assassin thing definitely put a damper on things.”
Hana’s eyes widen in surprise at the amount of information offered to her. She has the feeling it’s less about who she is, and more about the fact that Fire Lord Zuko obviously just needed to talk to someone about what’s troubling him. She’s not naive enough to think that those are the only problems that Fire Lord Zuko is facing either, but she wisely keeps her mouth shut against asking what else is bothering him.
She can’t, however, stop herself from muttering, “It sounds like you need to fire some of your advisors.”
Another short laugh is startled out of Zuko. “If only it were that easy,” he says, his breathing finally sounding like it’s going back to normal. They sit in silence for a few moments, both seemingly lost in thought. A baby turtleduck swims up to them, and Hana pulls the chunk of bread she had brought with her from her apron, pulling a small piece off and feeding it to the turtleduck.
She looks up to find Fire Lord Zuko already looking at her, his eyebrow raised. Hana can’t control the flush that burns her face, and she looks down again quickly.
“This is my favorite garden,” she explains. “It feels the most peaceful, and it’s away enough that you can’t hear the noises from inside the palace. Plus, the turtleducks are cute.”
Zuko hums again, this time in agreement. “It’s my favorite, too,” he says quietly. “When I was younger, I would come to sit here with my mother and play with the turtleducks.”
Hana is quiet again while she processes this information. Not much is known about Zuko’s mother, and even though she’s dead curious, Hana doesn’t dare to disturb the peaceful expression that has settled over Zuko’s face as he looks around the garden. Eventually, Zuko stands.
“I’m sure you came out here at first with a purpose that I’ve distracted you from,” he says. “Thank you for taking the time to speak with me.”
And with that, Fire Lord Zuko bows his head to her, much lower than would ever be necessary, and turns to walk away.
“Fire Lord Zuko!” she calls to him without thinking. He turns, a bit shocked. Hana stands, looks him in the eyes, and tells him with as much honesty as she can put into her voice, “I promise I won’t tell anyone about this. I’ll keep it private. You should have at least one space you can go to where you can feel as if you can let your guard down.”
Zuko is definitely shocked now. “I didn’t think you would tell anyone,” he says. “But thank you anyway.”
This time, when Zuko turns, she lets him walk away, and she doesn’t think she’s making up that he looks a bit happier as he walks away.
Kenji had worked in the kitchens of the palace since he was a teenager. He’d worked his way up from dishwasher, to prep and storage, to becoming the chef’s errand boy, to a chef himself, and finally to head cook. Kenji remembers being in his early twenties when Prince Zuko is born and remembers watching the small baby become a young kid. He remembers how Zuko used to sneak into the kitchen, complimenting the head chef and weaseling his way into getting snacks. Seriously, Kenji liked to believe he was a hardass, but even he fell victim to little Prince Zuko’s wide eyes and adorable face.
Then one day he just disappeared. Banished by his father and never expected to return.
Now, he’s no longer little Prince Zuko, but he’s Fire Lord Zuko, first of his name and bringer of peace. Now, Kenji is in his early forties and the little boy he used to sneak sweets is now a strong young man who has seen the worst life has to offer.
It’s a lot for Kenji to take in.
Despite this, it still seems as though Fire Lord Zuko hasn’t changed much from when he was little Prince Zuko. He still finds the time to come to the kitchens, offering his compliments on his meals and weaseling little snacks from everyone. (No, Kenji is not sneaking his Fire Lord extra snacks because he thinks the kid is too skinny, he’s not .) Often, one can find Fire Lord Zuko spending some of his spare time in the kitchens, listening to the staff gossip like school children, and pretending to do paperwork.
(“The kitchens are the best place to find the gossip,” Fire Lord Zuko defends. “You all seem to know everything before it happens, how else am I supposed to stay caught up?”
“And I’m sure the snacks don’t hurt,” Kenji says back.
“Of course not,” Fire Lord Zuko says. “The snacks are a bonus to all of your wonderful company.”
“Someone taught you early in life to make friends with the kitchen staff, didn’t they?” Keji says while Fire Lord Zuko just laughs in response.)
As head chef, Kenji is able to delegate to one of the younger kids the duty of taking inventory of their stock. It’s a mindless, easy job, but it’s also an important one. So, while one of the others does it during the day at the end of the week, Kenji often finds himself coming back to the kitchens in the middle of the night to look over everything himself. Sometimes he finds mistakes, sometimes he finds a container of food hidden in the very back that he has to then figure out how long it’s been there, but more often than not, he finds no problems. Still, Kenji doesn’t sleep much anyway, and he figures this is as good a task as any to pass the time. Much better than lying awake staring at the ceiling, anyway.
On this particular night, Kenji makes his way to the kitchen to find one of Fire Lord Zuko’s guards standing outside the door. Kenji slows as he approaches, raising his eyebrows at the young guard. (Kenji revels in the fact that the young, new staff always treat the older staff who dealt with Ozai with a wary kind of respect. It’s fun to mess with some of the fresh meat.) True to form, the young guard shifts under Kenji’s gaze.
“Fire Lord Zuko awoke a while ago,” the guard says quietly. “He came to the kitchen to make a cup of tea, he said.”
Kenji nods, though he’ll admit to being a bit worried at the concern on the guard’s face. “May I enter?” Kenji asks.
“Oh, yes, of course, sir.” the guard says, making way for Kenji to enter.
Kenji makes his way into the dimly lit kitchen, looking around for his Fire Lord. Kenji quickly spots the head guard, Ming, in a corner of the kitchen, and gives the man a nod of recognition. It takes him a second longer to spot Fire Lord Zuko, though. The young man is sitting in a dark corner of the little table they keep in the kitchen, head in his hands and hair falling into his face. He looks up when Kenji enters, though, so at least the kid is still aware of his surroundings.
He looks exhausted. Dark shadows under his eyes spoke of very little sleep, bloodshot eyes rimmed with red, and if Kenji so dared to think, he’d say his Fire Lord had been crying.
“You look like shit,” escapes Kenji’s mouth before he can stop it. Ming gives him a disapproving look while Zuko looks at him in shock. Kenji slaps a hand to his forehead, pursing his lips. Well, shit, Kenji thinks.
“My apologies, Fire Lord Zuko,” Kenji says, bowing his head. “That was not my place, it was very rude.”
Zuko sighs, running his hands through his hair. “It’s alright,” he whispers. “I must look worse than I thought.”
“It’s not that bad,” Kenji tries to say but stops once Zuko gives him a look. “Yeah okay, you look like you haven’t slept in a month.” Zuko just sighs again, letting his head thunk down onto the table.
“Here,” Kenji says. “Let me make you a cup of Jasmine tea, and maybe a snack to see if that doesn’t help you relax some.” Kenji moves over to the stove, pulling out one of the many teapots.
“You don’t have to,” Zuko says, already moving to get up. “I can do it myself.”
“Lord Zuko,” Kenji says. “You will sit there and relax, and allow an old man to make you a cup of tea.” Zuko blinks at him in shock, and out of the corner of his eye, Kenji sees Ming struggling not to laugh. Slowly, Zuko sinks back down into his chair. Kenji nods at him and adds the tea leaves to the water.
They wait in silence while the tea finishes brewing and Kenji sets up a plate of crackers and smoked meats. Once the tea is finished, Kenji pours all three of them a cup and sets the plate of snacks on the table in front of Zuko. Zuko pulls the cup of tea closer to him, breathing in the steam.
“Thank you,” he says softly. Zuko takes a small sip and hums consideringly. “Not quite as good as my Uncle’s, but it’ll do.”
“Well, I never claimed to make tea as good as The Dragon of the West,” Kenji mumbles. “Would you like to talk about what’s got you awake in the dead of night, or would you prefer to be distracted?”
Zuko looks down into his teacup silently for a few moments. Kenji is fully prepared to sit in silence if that’s what Zuko wants or distract him by asking Ming about his daughters, or anything that will get the haunted look out of Zuko’s eyes.
“It’s nothing, in particular, really,” Zuko whispers. “Just dreams. Makes it hard to sleep.”
Kenji nods, refilling Zuko’s now empty cup of tea and pushing the plate of snacks closer to him. “My brother went through something similar when he came home from the front lines. Never wanted to sleep because his dreams felt so real.”
“I have nightmares sometimes, as well,” Ming nods along.
Zuko looks between the two of them in shock. He opens his mouth as if to say something, but nothing comes out. Without thinking, Kenji reaches out and places his hand on top of Zuko’s, squeezing softly.
“It’s absolutely nothing to be ashamed about, Fire Lord Zuko,” Kenji says. “Life has certainly not been kind to you. Any lesser man would have broken under the pressure, but you have persevered.”
The three men sit in comfortable silence, finishing the pot of tea, and staring Zuko down until he starts to eat from the plate with a good-natured sigh. It’s as Zuko and Ming are preparing to leave that Zuko speaks again.
“Your brother,” he says. “Is he… does he have the help he needs?”
“He still struggles at times,” Kenji says. “But he’s doing much better. The aftercare you’ve offered to soldiers after the war has been very helpful.”
“I’m glad,” Zuko says. “Please let me know if there’s anything I can do to help.”
Kenji’s heart swells with affection for his Fire Lord and he’s sure some of it shows on his face because Zuko’s cheeks flush a soft pink.
“Thank you, Fire Lord Zuko,” Kenji says softly. “Thank you very much.”
Shi has been the master librarian for the palace since Azulon’s time. She knows the library like she knows the back of her hand, and she’s seen so much shit happen within the palace walls that no one dares to anger her.
(There’s a reason Shi never had children, and it’s not for lack of desire. She’s seen the horrors that children of the Fire Nation face, even the ones that grow up in the palace. Especially the ones that grow up in the palace. Shi would never willingly bring a child into the horrors that this world has to offer.)
It’s two months into this new age of peace that Shi sees Fire Lord Zuko for the first time since his childhood. She’s making her rounds late at night, preparing to kick whoever is still in the library out so she can lock up and go home. She almost misses the soft light from a lantern in one of the corners of the library dedicated to Earth Kingdom diplomacy.
Shi makes her way over, a reprimand on her tongue, when she notices that it’s not one of those Spirit’s damned advisors (Shi hates the advisors with a passion, the self-serving, egotistical assholes), but is Fire Lord Zuko instead. He’s hunched over a stack of scrolls, deep into the middle of a large one. It looks to Shi to be about the Earth Kingdom’s noble practices. Shi hesitates for a moment before deciding that even the Fire Lord needs to take a break from research.
“Fire Lord Zuko,” she says and the Fire Lord jumps at her voice. “I’m afraid I’m closing up the library soon, so you’ll have to wrap things up here.”
“Oh,” he says. “My apologies, Shi, I didn’t realize it had gotten so late.”
Shi is taken aback for a moment. She wasn’t aware Fire Lord Zuko knew her name, much less that she still worked at the palace.
“If you’re closing things up,” Fire Lord Zuko says, snapping her out of her reverie. “Would you mind if I took some of these back to my office? I’ve only just found what I was looking for.”
Shi thinks about it. Usually, she wouldn’t let a soul take scrolls from her library. However, Fire Lord Zuko seems earnest. (It has nothing to do with how she remembers his cute little puppy polar dog eyes as a child, absolutely not.)
“You can take two,” she relents. “The rest I’ll put away for you. You can come to get them from me when you bring those back.”
“Yes, ma’am,” Zuko says. He grabs the scroll he was reading and one more, bowing his head to her as he leaves.
Well, Shi thinks. This will be interesting.
Fire Lord Zuko comes back the next night, exchanging his two scrolls for the rest of the ones he had been reading. He stays until she closes up again.
Fire Lord Zuko comes back the next night. And the night after that. And the night after that. And again and again for three weeks straight. One night, she lets him stay for as long as he wants, never telling him of closing time, just to see what he does.
He stays the whole night. (He apologizes profusely in the morning, but Shi waves off his concern. “If I wanted you to leave, I would have made you leave. Relax, Fire Lord Zuko.”)
Does this boy ever sleep? Shi thinks. She begins to concoct a plan to help him out.
The next night when he comes by the library, she asks him what exactly he’s looking for.
“I’ve worked in this library since Fire Lord Azulon still had colored hair, trust me, I’ll be able to find whatever you’re looking for faster than you will.”
Fire Lord Zuko hesitates, but eventually responds, “I’m looking for anything about the Earth Kingdom and Water Tribe diplomacy measures and customs. I’m trying to learn as much as I can for the peace meetings.” Zuko shrugs his shoulders helplessly, “It would really suck if this war started back up again because I don’t know all the customs.”
Shi nods along with him, already thinking of where to look. “I’ll make you a deal,” she says. “Tonight, I’ll find everything relevant and current to what you need to know. You will go to your quarters and try to sleep. Don’t give me that look, I may be old but I can still see the circles under your eyes. Tomorrow, you come here at a reasonable hour, and I’ll give you the scrolls. You will read them here, and when I tell you to leave and go get some sleep, you leave to go get some sleep .”
“I’m fairly certain you’re not supposed to boss the Fire Lord around like that,” Zuko says, wide-eyed and slightly breathless.
Shi just raises a single eyebrow at him.
“Yes, ma’am,” Zuko says after an uncomfortable minute of silence and unbroken eye contact. “We’ll go with your plan of action.”
Shi nods and ushers him out of the library before she gets to work collecting scrolls. Obviously, someone is going to have to stop this boy from overworking himself, and if that’s her, then so be it.
Rin rues the day she first offered to be a guard at one of the diplomatic parties.
She’d thought it’d be an easy job. Maybe she’d have to deal with some drunk ambassadors, maybe people attempting to sneak in. At the worst, she’d been prepared for a mass assassination attempt against all the dignitaries in attendance.
She never thought she’d have to protect the Fire Lord from handsy, flirty nobles determined to sexually harass the young man.
(“It’s not fair,” Rin mutters. “You’re hardly even interested in women, but they won’t leave you alone. And here I am, a whole ass lesbian, and I’m ignored.”
“You can have them,” Fire Lord Zuko mutters back, hiding behind her as a group of women pass. “I’m more than happy without. I’ll even set you up myself. People will take dating advice from a seventeen-year-old, right?”)
Rin steers Fire Lord Zuko away from the gaggle of drinking and giggling women, sending him instead in the direction of some Earth Kingdom dignitaries he’s yet to speak to.
“The lesser of two evils,” she mumbles. Fire Lord Zuko doesn’t agree out loud, but he does nod a bit. Rin sends a glare to the girls and only some of them shrink back from her intense look.
Oh, these ones have guts, Rin thinks. If only Mai were here to really scare them away. Rin has no idea if the Fire Lord is still dating the dark-haired weapons master or not, but regardless, Mai always does a brilliant job of scaring off the men and women who flirt with Fire Lord Zuko. Rin keeps one eye on the girls and one eye on Fire Lord Zuko, and she prepares for a long night.
Some of the girls make a valiant attempt to speak with Fire Lord Zuko, but he always excuses himself with a polite, “I’m very sorry, but I’m meant to be speaking with Ambassador Yan, right now.” or “My apologies miss, but I must find the Director of Engineering, it’s very important, I’m sure you understand.” Rin has to admit, Fire Lord Zuko is really good at making up bullshit excuses to get away from the flirty girls.
At some point, Rin leaves Fire Lord Zuko in the care of one of the other guards, while she goes to settle a drunk dispute with some Earth Kingdom diplomats before it turns into a scuffle. Rin takes the two diplomats aside, figures out that they’re fighting over literally nothing, and tells them in no uncertain terms to “get their shit together.” She leaves them in the care of two sober Earth Kingdom diplomats, who give the two drunks the telling off of their lives. Rin is watching from the side, contemplating if she may have a crush on one of the Earth Kingdom diplomats currently using every curse word under the sun to berate her drunk coworker, or if she’s just wishing that were her giving the berating, when the guard she left with Fire Lord Zuko comes finds her.
“Rin!” he hisses, pulling her away from the crowd. “I need help!”
“What? What happened?” she asks. “Where’s Fire Lord Zuko?”
“That’s what I need your help with!” he says pointing to the side of the room. Rin sees Fire Lord Zuko surrounded by three of the flirty girls from before and looking increasingly uncomfortable.
“What the hell!” Rin says. “Why would let him be alone with those girls?”
“I don’t know what happened! I looked away for a few minutes and when I looked back they were there!”
Rin sighs and makes her way over to Fire Lord Zuko, mumbling under her breath about “useless men” and “don’t ever listen to me”.
“Excuse me, ladies, I’m so sorry,” she interrupts them pushing herself between the girls and Fire Lord Zuko. “I’m going to have to steal Fire Lord Zuko from you. There’s been a security emergency and I’m going to need the Fire Lord. I hope you understand.”
Without waiting for them to respond, Rin takes hold of Fire Lord Zuko’s arm and pulls him away and to a dark corner, hidden from the crowd.
“What’s wrong?” Fire Lord Zuko asks. “What’s going on?”
“Oh nothing,” Rin says. “I was just getting you away from the girls.”
Fire Lord Zuko sighs, attempting to make himself invisible. “Thank you,” he sighs. “Why won’t they just leave me alone?” His voice is dangerously close to a whine. A waiter passes by with a tray of drinks, and Fire Lord Zuko snatches one up, downing it in a second.
Rin raises her eyebrows, both at the drink and the statement. “Because,” she says simply. “You’re the Fire Lord, yes, that’s a part of it. But you are also known for your kindness and refusal to treat others as less than you.”
Fire Lord Zuko looks like he’s going to argue with her, so she says, “It also may have something to do with the fact that you’re very handsome, as well.”
Rin then has the absolute delight of watching her Fire Lord blush a bright red and look away from her. Rin holds back a laugh, settling instead for patting him on the shoulder. “Give it a few years,” she says. “The novelty will wear off and people will begin to leave you alone.”
“A few years,” he mumbles taking another glass from a passing waiter and tossing that back as well. “Utter bullshit. I’m doomed.”
Rin doesn’t hold back her laugh this time.
Fire Lord Zuko is sick. The whole palace staff knows it, the advisors and other diplomats know it, the animals that hang around the palace probably know it.
The only one who won’t admit it is Fire Lord Zuko himself.
Everyone in the palace tries to get him to take a break and rest for at least one day before he gets so sick that he passes out. Or worse. The head doctor in the infirmary originally says that it’s most likely a strain of the flu that’s been going around that took a few staff members out of commission a few weeks ago. She advises Fire Lord Zuko to take two days’ rest, only leaving his room if necessary.
Fire Lord Zuko steadfastly ignored those orders.
(“I’m the Fire Lord,” he says. “I can’t just take a sick day. I have an entire nation to run and a war to make sure stays over.”
“And you can’t do any of that if you’re stuck in the hospital because you refused to rest when you could still get better quickly,” The head doctor rebuttals.)
Everyone tries to get him to stay in bed. Head guard Ming tries cajoling, bargaining, and finally trying to force Zuko to stay in his room. A girl from the gardens named Hana finds him near one of the ponds recovering from a dizzy spell and manages to get him to lay on the sofa in his office and drink a glass of water, but he gets up again almost immediately after. She tries to play to his side that often caves to his concerned citizens (“I’m just very worried about you, Fire Lord Zuko. It would really make a lot of us feel better if you took it easy for the rest of the day.” “Hana, please, I promise you I’m fine.”) Head chef Kenji only makes soups and other various “sick person” foods in an attempt to be passive-aggressive.
Nothing works.
Finally, in a last-ditch effort, they decide to call in the heavy forces.
Two days after a letter reeking of desperation and the arrival of a war balloon to pick the man up, General Iroh lands in the palace pavilion.
Ming is there to greet him, and he swears he could drop to his knees and praise the man, he’s so happy to see him. General Iroh greets him warmly, and they say their proper hello’s before Ming actually can’t take it anymore.
“Please do something about your stubborn nephew,” Ming all but begs. “He’s so sick he’s all but walking death and he won’t listen to any of us. ”
General Iroh laughs softly and says, “I’m sure it’s not that bad, but I’ll see what I can do.”
General Iroh doesn’t know what’s about to hit him.
***
Iroh greatly miscalculated how sick Zuko was. He’d thought Ming and the others were overexaggerating when they told him how stubborn Zuko was being. Iroh takes one look at Zuko and knows that the boy is probably one hour, max, from passing out. He’s probably only still awake by sheer willpower and stubbornness.
“Uncle?” Zuko says with surprise when he catches sight of Iroh. “What are you doing here? I thought you weren’t coming for another month, at least.”
Iroh can’t help the smile that crosses his face at seeing and hearing Zuko again. Spirits, he’s missed his nephew so much. “I decided to surprise you,” he says. “I couldn’t wait that long to see you again.”
Zuko’s face softens before he suddenly looks conflicted. “I’d love to spend some time with you, but I have a meeting with the Secretary of Agriculture soon.”
Iroh blinks at his nephew. He takes in the way he’s slightly swaying on his feet, the sweat that’s broken out on his forehead, his flushed cheeks, and his hazy eyes. Iroh decides he needs to pull out the big guns.
Iroh looks up at Zuko and makes his eyes wide and glassy, makes sure his bottom lip is quivering just so. “I’m sure the Secretary of Agriculture would understand pushing your meeting back for a day,” he says. Iroh makes sure his voice wavers just slightly. He can see that Zuko is close to cracking, his face has softened again and he looks like he desperately wants to say yes.
“I’ve missed you so much, nephew. Surely you can take just the rest of the day to spend some time with your poor old uncle. It feels like it’s been so long since we’ve just spoken to one another.”
Iroh knows he’s convinced Zuko with that one. Zuko smiles at him, laughing softly and shaking his head. “You know, manipulation with good intentions is still manipulation,” he says.
“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Iroh says happily. He turns to one of the guards by Zuko’s side and says, “Please inform everyone that the Fire Lord’s meetings will be canceled for the day and be rearranged for a different time. I’m afraid Zuko will be busy for the rest of the day.”
“Yes, sir,” the guard says quickly and makes his escape.
Iroh loops one of his arms through Zuko’s, subtly taking some of his nephew’s weight. “How about we go to your quarters? It will be much more comfortable there.” Iroh gently leads Zuko through the halls and into his room. Zuko walks by his side silently the whole way, and when Iroh looks up into his face from up close, Iroh can see just how tired Zuko really looks.
Oh, my poor boy, Iroh thinks. I may have to come to visit more often.
Iroh opens the door to Zuko’s room and ushers him inside. Before he shuts the door, he asks one of the other guards to send for some food and tea from the kitchens. The man nods and heads off, and Iroh makes eye contact with Ming, nodding his head once and shutting the door softly.
“Why don’t you change into something more comfortable than these formal robes and then we can chat a bit,” Iroh offers.
“Sure,” Zuko mumbles. He collects a set of casual clothes and makes his way into his en suite bathroom. Iroh walks a bit closer to the door, determined to be able to hear if Zuko makes any concerning noises that he may want to check on. A few minutes later, Iroh hears a soft knock on the door. He goes to open it to find Ming with a tray of soup and a pot of what smells like strong ginseng tea.
“Perfect,” Iroh says, taking the tray from Ming. “Thank you.” Ming nods and closes the door for Iroh. Iroh sets the tray down on the low tea table Zuko has in his room just as Zuko emerges from the bathroom. He’s in comfier clothes now, and his hair is down out of the top knot. It looks a bit wet at the ends, as if Zuko had splashed some water on his face, and is curling a bit near the bottom. Iroh can’t stop the heartfelt smile that blooms across his face at the sight.
“Why don’t you come and sit on the sofa with me? I asked for some food and drink to be sent in, so we can sit and relax for a while.”
Zuko comes to sit next to him without complaint and takes the proffered bowl of soup. His lips quirk up a bit and he says, “Kenji has only been feeding me soup since I got sick. He thinks he’s being clever by only making ‘sick people food’, as he calls it.”
“So you admit you’re sick,” Iroh teases. Zuko rolls his eyes, but almost immediately has to pinch his nose and fight off the wave of dizziness that follows. Iroh tuts at him, helping him balance the bowl of soup so none spills.
“I know I’m sick,” Zuko says softly. “But I didn’t want to tell anyone. I’m supposed to be their leader, how can they trust me to lead them if I can’t even stop myself from getting sick?”
Iroh knows it’s a rhetorical question and Zuko doesn’t expect him to answer, but Iroh’s heart breaks a little bit at the helplessness in Zuko’s voice.
“My dear nephew,” Iroh says wrapping an arm around Zuko’s shoulders. “I hope you know that the entire palace staff adores you, and would do anything for you.”
Zuko makes a noise of protest but Iroh barrels on. “No, really. You are the best thing that has ever happened to the Fire Nation, and the people know it. You have proven yourself time and time again to your people and they trust you. If you won’t believe them when they show they care, believe me when I tell you they support and believe in you.”
Zuko is quiet for a while while he eats his soup and drinks his tea. Iroh is fine with the silence, he’s grown used to it around Zuko. He will speak once he’s put his thoughts in order and is ready.
After Zuko finishes his bowl of soup, and Iroh has watched him drink two cups of tea, Zuko sits back on the sofa and curls up. Iroh scoots a bit closer, laying his arm over the back of the sofa to invite Zuko to cuddle in if he so wishes. Zuko doesn’t move for a moment, but eventually, he scoots close enough to rest his head on Iroh’s shoulder. Iroh carefully begins to card his fingers through Zuko’s hair, marveling at how long it’s become.
“This is nice,” Zuko says. “I’ve missed you, too. Just so you know.”
“I always know, nephew,” Iroh says back softly.
“You know,” he says. His voice is getting slower and deeper as he finally lets himself relax and start to fall asleep. “It’s hard for me to trust people. Especially myself. I’ve always trusted you, though, so I’ll believe you when you say that people believe in me.”
Iroh has to fight down his tears as he pulls Zuko closer and squeezes him. “I’m honored that you trust me, my dear nephew.”
“‘Course I do,” Zuko mumbles, clearly on the edge of sleep. “I love you.”
“I love you, too, Zuko,” Iroh whispers, letting the tears fall down his face. “I love you so much.”
Zuko sleeps on the sofa with Iroh for a few hours, before Iroh has one of the guards help him move Zuko to his bed. There, Zuko sleeps for a solid seventeen hours, and Iroh deals with stuffy advisors, who quickly cower under his glares, and reorganizes Zuko’s schedule to be more capable for when he’s better.
Later, when Zuko awakes looking better than he has in days, he will see Iroh sitting next to his bed, and will smile softly at him and allow Iroh to fuss over him until he’s deemed fully healed without any protests.