Archive of Our Own ^beta

The day was pleasantly warm. A nice breeze blew through the trees making the shadows dance. The sun shone down gently on the April day. Nearly two months had passed since Akira had accepted Maruki's deal. 

Akira sat alone on a bench in the park. He had long since tired of the now superficial bonds he shared with his friends. It was hard to look them in the eyes after what he'd done to them. Everyone was so happy but, was this really for the best? Was this fake reality worth betraying the trust of his friends? In the back of his mind he knew his answer. 

It was back in February when Akira realized he was the sole survivor of reality. All his friends were under Maruki's influence and Maruki himself, well, he was somewhat delusional. The only person that came close to Akira was Akechi. He could see the constant internal fight as reality tried to subdue him. It was like watching someone trying to carve a triangle into a circle. It could be done, he had no doubt about that, but you lose so much.

By mid March, Akechi had been made perfectly round. There was no more fighting, no more awful moods, and no more Akechi. Only the detective prince remained. Akira wondered how long until he ended up like Akechi and the rest of his friends. What would it be like? Would it be long and painful like Akechi or would he wake up one day only remembering what Maruki told him like everyone else?

Some days Akira almost wished that Maruki would hurry up. Being the only one awake in a fantasy was exhausting. He could only have the same perfect day over and over so many times until he lost it.

Other days he would stay in bed paralyzed with regret and guilt. Why was it always up to him to determine the fate of the world? How would things have turned out if he hadn't betrayed Akechi? He had just been so tired of fighting, he couldn't think of another way out.

Akira sat alone on the pleasant April day, the only person left in the world. It was a lonely existence but one he deserved for betraying the world. He had deposed a fake God just to help a new one ascend. What was the real difference between Maruki and Yaldabaoth? That one framed his control compassion while the other framed his as duty? The one prioritized fake happiness and blind obedience while the other only wanted blind obedience?

Sometimes Akira wondered what his wish was. What part of this reality was meant to entice him? Was it the concept itself? Was Akechi supposed to be his wish? Whatever it was, it was not doing its job. On the best of days he felt little more than melancholy. Where was his promised happiness? Maybe it was with the real Phantom Thieves or with the Akechi who died in Shido's palace. Maybe his happiness died along with the old world.