Chapter Text
So. Here you are, reading a "fic" about an eating disorder. Welcome.
I assume you know what Anorexia looks like, or what Bulimia is. And you probably could vaguely empathize with image problems, vomiting food up, or going through fasts. Maybe you even know what body checking content is. This isn't quite about that. Forget it at the gate.
Welcome, to eating disorders that aren't about self-image. Suffer with us. :)
ARFID: Avoidant and Restrictive Food Intake Disorder, and often misrepresented as extremely picky eating. It's newly defined. With barely a decade of officially recorded cases, no one knows just how often it occurs. Few people know about it, and fewer actually get diagnosed with it. Instead of patients starving themselves trying to lose weight, people who suffer from ARFID can often starve themselves while attempting to gain weight, or without losing weight at all.
It usually manifests as the symptoms listed in its name. Avoidant, and restrictive intake. Though individuals with it are hungry, and hold no ill will towards eating, they often avoid food entirely, or eat to an extremely restrictive diet. Characteristically, their issues with food tend to be brushed off as issues with textures, tastes, smells, etc., or are associated with previous food-related "trauma"s. Often this means whole food groups can be eliminated by association with a certain memory or taste. It has nothing to do with image, and everything to do with qualities of the food, which gets labeled as "picky" eating. While this isn't inherently wrong, the association is harmful. This isn't a purposeful diet in an attempt to lose weight, this is the avoidance of food that genuinely, if somewhat irrationally, make the person feel anywhere from uncomfortable to distressed. People with Avoidant or Restricted Food Intake Disorder don't eat when they're hungry, or don't get many of the necessary nutrients out of their "safe" foods.
ARFID tends to manifest in younger people, children and teens, and has no "cure", although it's usually manageable. Patients have to use the age-old adage of "just get over it", and it can take their entire lifetime to do so. Essentially, exposure therapy, in the same way its uses for fears or more overt traumas, is the only real solution experts have at the moment. Worse, no two cases are likely to be comparable in any substantial way beyond not eating enough. People have different experiences and preferences with food, and often safe foods are simply what is most familiar. It can make trying new food a tricky obstacle, or at the very least it has to be much more purposefully done.
In an effort to remedy a few of those issues, I'm putting my personal experiences with this monster on the internet for the world to see.
I could put a disclaimer here that I'm not officially diagnosed, but I'm going to spend the next however many chapters defending my right to use this label. If at any point it comes out that I do not, in fact, have ARFID, I will either take this down or continue this with an addendum of how that might go.
As it stands, ARFID is often undiagnosed and is a wide-reaching label, that I've done enough research into to feel confident using.
(Edit for future readers, I am currently seeing a psychiatrist, and have spoken to a doctor about this. No confirmation, but given the other neurodivergency issues we're looking at treating, via meds or therapy lmao, (ADHD, Depression, Anxiety, etc.) It's not much of a stretch. I am much more comfortable with my health issues now than I was when I first wrote this, and I'm managing well. I no longer feel the need to justify self-diagnosis, especially for things that can't be treated by anyone but me. There's no real point for me to seek a diagnosis now unless someone else brings it up. Still, hope this helps!)