Chapter Text
Hajime couldn't stop smiling.
It was the first thing he'd noticed upon waking up- well, after the fact he suddenly couldn't breathe, along with a horrible pain blossoming behind his skull before spreading through the rest of his body, aware of how hot he suddenly felt. He'd shot up in his bed, and his face was suddenly broken into a wide grin. The grin was so large, in fact, that it made his cheeks hurt and his teeth smart. But… that was okay(it wasn't)! He felt great(he didn't)! So great, in fact, that he burst out laughing(oh god it hurt).
His sudden burst of laughter broke his otherwise silent room, and his eyes darted to his window to check if it was morning. He wanted to share his state of happiness with his friends- all of them(stop please make it stop it hurts)! They deserved to be happy, too, like he was, after all(this isn't happiness this is pain stop stop stopstop )! He instantly bolts out from beneath his covers, bare feet hitting the cold floor of his cabin. He's so excited and thrilled at the thought of sharing his happiness with his friends.
So, of course he ignores the way he wants to collapse as soon as his weight lands on his feet. Of course he ignores how his head pounds with pain and his chest feels nearly too tight to breathe. None of that matters- he's so happy(nonononononono)!
He nearly forgets to dress and get his shoes on, vibrating with his barely contained happiness. The thought makes him laugh aloud at his own memory lapse, playfully slapping himself on his forehead. He opens his door, the grin that is seemingly permanently plastered to his face growing even larger. It has grown so wide, in fact, that the corners of his eyes prick with tears. But that doesn't matter, he's so happy(this isn't happiness what is this help)!
He forces his body to continue moving towards the restaurant, basically dragging his feet to keep walking. He wants to see all of his friends so, so badly. He wants to share his happiness(this is so painful why can't he stop smiling)!
The stairs are a tad more difficult, and he stumbles on a few of his steps, and he pauses to laugh at his clumsiness a few times, before pushing forward again.
When he finally makes it to the top, he finds the restaurant completely empty, aside from Hiyoko and a somewhat (terrifying) beautiful shrine! The shrine has many candles surrounding it, the smoke from the flames hovering over the top, and around the animal skulls hanging from either side. Hiyoko is standing just in front of it, her expression one of surprise, like she was caught red handed doing something. The sight of both this (scary) amazing shrine and one of his friends fills him with delight.
But before he could speak, Hiyoko’s expression sours, turning from one of shock to one of disgust, “Ew, why are you smiling like that, Hajime?” She gasps, her eyes going even wider. “Are you planning to do something to me?!”
A laugh bubbles in his chest, and it's too (painful) wonderful to ignore, so he releases it boisterously. This seems to only freak Hiyoko out further, as she looks from Hajime to the exit. He has to hunch over slightly as the laughter continued at the hilarious scene(this wasn't funny, stop laughing why can't he stop please stop).
“Of course not!” he exclaimed once the laughing eased enough to allow him to speak. He couldn't keep himself from continuing to chuckle, however. His cheeks were starting to get sore from grinning. “I'm just- I'm so happy! I love that shrine- I love whatever it's for- I love you and I love life!”
He wraps his arms around himself as his body continues to tremble with his laughter, which has quieted down to a breathy version(it hurts). Hiyoko continues to stare at him through wide eyes, her face turning a soft pink.
“What the hell is wrong with you?” she demanded, pointing an accusatory finger at him. He raises an eyebrow at her to express his confusion, but the grin stays perfectly in place. “I mean- of course the shrine is awesome, there's no doubt of that,” she sounds proud of it and herself. Ah, she must have built it. How wonderful. The grin grows larger at the thought, and tears escape the corners of his eyes, “But you- you never act like this!”
“Hahaha, why do you sound so mean?” he asked her in return, his laughter finally( finally thank god ) ceasing. Her lips purse at him, eyebrows scrunching together with her discontentment. “I'm just so, so happy!! Aren't you too?”
“How could I be?! Mahiru is dead, you asshole!” Hiyoko shouted, now thoroughly pissed off at him. But why(Harumi was our friend she died she's dead she's gone why is he not sad)? That doesn't sense at all.
“But that was yesterday!” Hajime pointed out, hoping to help her remember. It was yesterday- it didn't matter today, they should be happy(it did matter of fucking course it mattered why is he saying this he doesn't want to)!
Hiyoko is horrified, if her face has anything to say about it. She stutters for a few seconds, surprisingly, and opens her mouth to speak, when the sound of a loud voice someone crying interrupted her. Hajime’s eyes widened at the sound of crying- why was someone crying(he wants to cry why can't he cry or at least stop smiling please help)? They should be happy, like he is!
“Oh, Hajime!” it was Kazuichi’s voice. Behind him trailed a crying Akane. The girl was crying so hard, in fact, that her hunched shoulders were shaking with her sobs. She's wiping furiously at the tears running down her cheeks fruitlessly, and a line of snot drips from one of her nostrils. She doesn't even move to grab some food, which was out of her character. But why was she so sad? Hajime couldn't understand(Nekomaru was hurt, possibly dead, Mahiru is dead, he shouldn't be smiling why can't he stop smiling). “Thank goodness you're- AAAAHHH!”
Kazuichi had noticed the wonderful shrine, his hands flailing as his eyes nearly burst out of their sockets. Hajime snorts at his reaction, before falling into another laughing fit. Akane cries louder, probably from a mixture of Kazuichi’s shout and the sight of the beautiful shrine. “WHAT IS THAT?” Kazuichi cried, wildly pointing at the shrine. “It's horrifying!!”
“No way, Soda!!” Hajime retorted happily, moving to Kazuichi’s side to grip one of his shoulders. He shuts his eyes to allow his grin to grow ever larger, lightly(loudly) laughing to appease his friend. “It's an awesome shrine! It makes me so happy!! Doesn't it make you happy?”
“It- it’s s- so sc- scary!!” Akane wailed, her tears growing larger, falling faster down her cheeks. “Who- who would make so- something like thaaat!!”
“Why is big boobs crying so much?” Hiyoko asked, her voice filled with disdain. “She's acting as weird as the freak Hajime.”
Kazuichi’s eyes dart from Hajime’s grinning face, to Akane’s devastated face, all the way to Hiyoko’s scornful face. He brushes Hajime’s hand from his shoulder, and Hajime can feel the smile on his face lessen slightly(hardly at all it still hurts why can't he stop help) at the action. The other boy is shaking his head furiously, his own tears sliding down his face.
“What the hell is happening? I don't understand!” Kazuichi exclaimed. He looks to Hiyoko, his desperation now reaching out to her.
“Don't ask me!” Hiyoko snapped, crossing her arms over her chest furiously. “I came in here, saw this nice shrine, and then that freak came in acting like a freak!”
“He never laughs this much!” Kazuichi pointed out, and Hajime laughed loudly at this.
“What's the matter with me laughing?” Hajime asked curiously, trying to get close to Kazuichi once more. But the other boy keeps dodging him, whimpering like he was an enemy trying to attack him. “I'm just so happy!”
“H- how are y- you happyyyyy??” Akane sobbed, sniffing dramatically. She shoves one of her hand’s heels into both of her eyes in turn. “Nek- Nekomaru i- is hurt. And it- it's my faaaauuulltt!!”
Hajime abandons trying to reach Kazuichi to instead wrap his arms around Akane’s shoulders, smiling gently(painfully) to her. “That was yesterday!” he explained, hoping to help her see why she shouldn't be sad anymore. “Today he isn't hurt!”
Akane pauses in her crying momentarily to glance up at him, sniffling a bit quieter now. “R- really? He- he's not hurt anymore?” when he shakes his head no in confirmation, his smile turning pleasant, she breaks down again, burying her face in his chest. “Waaaah! B- but he's s- still gone because of meee!”
He pats her back comfortingly, glancing up at the sound of footsteps approaching. Nagito has entered the restaurant, looking first at the shrine, then at Kazuichi and Hiyoko cowering on the other side of the room, and then at a grinning Hajime hugging a sobbing Akane. His pale eyes go just as wide as both Kazuichi’s and Hiyoko’s had gone earlier.
“Hajime? What's going on?” he said, clearly curious of what the heck was happening. And, of course, Hajime was beyond happy to help him.
He pulls himself from Akane, her crying growing loud once again at the loss of the contact. He ignores it for now, because he could help her later- Nagito needs his help now(why was Akane crying what is that shrine why can't I stop smiling)!
“Nagito!!” Hajime exclaimed in greeting, tightly gripping one of Komaeda’s hands. The other boy’s eyebrows shoot up to his hairline at the voluntary action- he was probably thinking about how Hajime didn't engage in contact, and normally avoided it. But that doesn't matter today- he was so happy he wants to touch people! …Especially Nagito. The idea of it makes him even happier(please god help him)! “Hiyoko made this beautiful shrine, it makes me so happy! Doesn't it make you happy!” He pauses to laugh for a few seconds, and Nagito frowns for some reason. Why would he frown right now? He should be happy, too! “I'm also very happy to see you! You make me so happy!” He laughs once more, shoulders shaking with the effort(why is he saying that stop talking stop smiling stop laughing stop it hurts it hurts it hurts).
With his cheeks painted a light red, Nagito gently pries Hajime’s hand from his own, still frowning. Hajime doesn't like that. Why wasn't he smiling, too? Shouldn't he be happy to see Hajime like Hajime is happy to see him?
“Are you feeling alright, Hajime?” Nagito asked, instead of acknowledging any of his past words. That confused Hajime further. Why was Nagito ignoring what he was saying(because he doesn't want to say it he knows he's not right help him help him please)?
“I feel so happy!” Hajime repeated the same phrase, bouncing on the balls of his feet, his legs trembling under the movement.
A few more people are piling in, as well, and Hajime is going to turn his head- he wants to greet them, to say hello, to make them happy, too!-, but a very cold, very smooth hand is suddenly pressed against his hot forehead, stopping the movement. Nagito’s eyes widen, his mouth falling open as he looks to one of the new occupants.
“Hajime, you're burning up,” Nagito informed him, as if it mattered. “You feel hot- too hot. Mikan-” he can hear her gasp in surprise at being called, and he wants to look at her, but Nagito’s hand on his head(his fingers are lightly rubbing through the tips of his hair it feels nice don't stop please help) keeps him from doing so, unable to stop himself from leaning into the cool touch. He was really hot, and Nagito’s hand did feel really nice, it was making him happy- “Could you come here a second?”
At his request, Mikan appears beside both of them, and Hajime now pulls his head- only a tad reluctantly- from Nagito’s cold hand to grin at her. She squeals at his expression before pressing her own hand to his forehead, quickly pulling it back.
“Ee- eek!” she exclaimed. “He- he’s as hot as Gandham!”
“Thank you, Mikan!” Hajime said happily, the fact that Mikan said something so kind to him made the grin grow impossibly large once more(it hurts he can't stop). Oddly enough, though, both Mikan and Nagito are frowning at him.
“I'm so sorry!” Gandham suddenly shouted, his face hidden behind his scarf. It looks like he's frowning, too, and why is everyone frowning(two people died Nekomaru is hurt he should be frowning why isn't he frowning)? Hajime couldn't understand. “It's probably somehow my fault… The demons affecting me must have infected him, too, because I didn't have high enough defenses to keep them back!”
“Th- there are demons?!” Akane was shouting as well, terrified of the possible demons.
“Akane, please calm down,” Sonia said, her voice low and calm and appeasing. Hajime grins at the princess- he hadn't noticed her at first! But she was here, too, and that makes him very happy(he still can't stop smiling why can't he stop please sonia)! “I am sure the demons cannot affect you, as well.”
“They- they must all be s- sick,” Mikan informed everyone gathered, her hands hovering in front of herself as she timidly spoke. Hajime grabs one of her hands, as well as one of Nagito’s, and squeezes them to hopefully make them happy, too(please help him he could do this please notice please help).
“Sick?!” Hiyoko exclaimed, and she quickly ran from Kazuichi. “Get away from me then!”
“Me??” Kazuichi said. “I'm not sick!!”
“Hajime touched you! Don't touch me you probably have it!!” Hiyoko yelled, her eyes flying back and forth sporadically to make sure no one was coming near her. “Everyone stay away from me!”
“Calm the fuck down!” oh, when had Fuyuhiko gotten here? He turns his smiling face to the yakuza, and releases both hands he'd been holding captive to rush over to the shorter boy. “Freaking the fuck out won't- HEY!”
He's interrupted when Hajime throws his arms around him, rubbing his cheek against his short hair(why is he doing this why can't he stop). “Baby gangsta!!” he said with laughter(no please don't laugh again it hurts), making sure to hug him tightly. Fuyuhiko sputters non coherently, not even pushing at the taller boy due to his surprise. “I'm so happy to see you!!!”
“Get the hell off!” Fuyuhiko protests. His face is burning a bright red, and his struggles are weak. He must still be exhausted from his injuries. But that's okay- Hajime could make him happy again by hugging him(he lost his childhood friend his guardian his lover his everything he can't make him happy)!
Monokuma’s loud laughter makes everyone pause. The half and half bear appears very suddenly in the center of the room, grinning almost as widely as Hajime was.
“Well I'd say everyone is livening up some!” the bear exclaimed. Hajime doesn't stop hugging Fuyuhiko, but does turn his head to look at Monokuma. “Welcome to your third motive!!”
“I like this motive!” Hajime replied, giggling. Fuyuhiko finally manages to push him off, but he doesn't mind right now. He bounces on the tips of his toes(stop his body hurts stop moving he wants to lay down), his hands shaking with his barely contained happiness. “It makes me feel happy!”
“Oh, I'm sure it does, Hinata!” Monokuma chuckled, his dark eyes filled with sadistic mirth. “This is- drum roll please- the Despair Disease!!”
“I love the Despair Disease!!” Hajime laughed, tears wetting his cheeks once more. He can feel someone’s gaze burning into the side of his head, and he turns his watery vision to find Nagito watching him closely, his frown deepening at the tears(he's crying it hurts please help). “Don't you, Nagito? It makes me so happy!”
“The name and affects fills me with despair,” Nagito said with a heavy sigh, tearing his eyes to look at the bear. “It must affect each person differently, right? That's why Hajime is happy, Gandham is timid, and Akane won't stop crying?”
“Ding ding ding!” Monokuma sang, and Akane bawls at how loud his voice is. Sonia pats her shoulder soothingly. “Right on the money, Komaeda!” He gestures to each infected- Hajime can't be infected, he feels happy!- in turn as he speaks, “Hinata is afflicted with the Happiness Disease- a change for the better, in my opinion! Gandham has the Inferiority Disease- he feels even more like trash than you do right now, Komaeda! And Akane has the Coward Disease, so she can't stop crying!”
“He's right, I am a coward!” Akane wailed, completely ignoring Sonia’s comforting words and gestures.
“It is true, a being such as myself will never level up to grow stronger,” Gandham muttered. “My Dark Devas of Destruction deserve a better master than myself. I am horribly useless. I couldn't even conquer the spreading demons, as weak as they were, for I am even weaker.”
“That sounds wonderful!” Hajime added, bouncing up and down now(oh god it hurts he's about to fall over please stop). “This is making me so happy!”
“H- how can we- we cure them?” Mikan said. Monokuma merely laughs.
“By killing again, of course!” the bear said sadistically.
“Is it contagious?” Chiaki asked next, and Hajime perks up further at her voice. He hadn't even noticed she'd been here this entire time! She looks tired, and he could help!!
“Very contagious!” Monokuma said, and Hiyoko moves even further from everyone else.
“Are they gonna be okay?” Ibuki said, and Hajime wants to hug her now. Scratch that- he wants to hug everyone!!
“Nope!” Monokuma replied joyously. “Soon enough, all three of them will die if no one is killed!” He bursts out laughing, and Hajime can't stop himself from joining in.
“Why are you laughing too, Hinata?!” Hiyoko demands accusingly. “You're going to die, you freak!”
“I'm just- just- so happy!” Hajime said between breaths of laughter. He's still crying. Whether from his too big grin, his painful laughter, or something else(it hurts it hurts it hurts) he wasn't sure. It didn't matter, though. He was so happy. He can hear Monokuma chuckling at him, and his sudden dilemma of not being able to stop laughing. “I- I can't stop laughing, I'm- I'm s- so hap- happy!!”
He knows he's hyperventilating as he laughed now. But that wasn't important- nor was the fact that he was getting light headed important. He was so happy, and he just wants to laugh and laugh, so why stop(he's going to die here isn't he someone help him please)? He can faintly hear Akane’s crying getting louder as well, accompanied by Gandham berating himself in every sentence. He can also hear the others talking, but he can't understand them. His eyes screw shut as he keeps laughing hysterically(make it stop please make it stop). One of his hands curls up towards his chest, grabbing a handful of his shirt.
He's still laughing when a hand suddenly comes to grip his shoulder, giving it a tight squeeze.
“Hajime.” it’s Nagito's voice. The taller boy is directly beside him, keeping a tight grip on his shoulder. His other hand moves to hold Hajime’s hand, prying it from its deadly grip from his shirt before guiding down and away. “I know you're really happy, and that's great- I'm happy because you are.” Hajime’s eyes open at his words, and he can see Nagito is smiling too, now(Nagito please help him he can't breathe). But why does he still look sad, though? Oh well- he's smiling now so he is probably happy! “Do you know what would make me even happier? If you could drink some water for me, even if I am trash.” (He understands he's helping him he's helping him)
“Y- yes!!” Hajime exclaimed, and forces himself to focus on his laughter(his panic attack that wasn't laughter anymore he had been panicking). “It'll make me so happy to make you happy!” His breathing is slowing, the laughter quieting. He gets to a point where he only chuckles every few seconds, now, and Nagito is offering him a glass of water. “Th- thank you, Nagito! You make me so happy!”
Nagito continues to smile at him as he finally takes the glass of water, trembling only a little bit as he brings it to his lips. Out of the corners of his eyes, he can see the others calming and guiding the infected from the restaurant. Sonia has left Akane’s side- somewhat reluctantly- and is leading Gandham from the room, adoomishing him gently whenever he speaks badly about himself. Kazuichi is helping Akane down the steps, making sure she doesn't trip and fall. Mikan is following both pairs, tightly frowning. He doesn't see Chiaki or Hiyoko, but he does see Fuyuhiko standing and watching him and Nagito nearby, eyebrows knitted together tightly.
After gulping down some of the water, Hajime smiles at Nagito again. “Where did everyone else go? I wanted to make them happy!”
“They're helping the others get to the hospital,” Nagito explained, his voice low and somehow soothing. His tone of voice currently was one Hajime hasn't heard much, aside from directly after he'd woken up on the beach, and it really makes him happy. He sounded so nice and caring. And while Hajime doesn’t feel bad(his legs are weak he's weak he's about to pass out) and doesn't need caring for, the thought of Nagito caring for him anyway made him incredibly happy. “I stayed to help you get there, and Fuyuhiko is making sure that I don't do anything. Which is strange, but it makes sense that none of them would trust someone like me.”
“But why wouldn't they trust you?” Hajime asked, blinking at him owlishly. “You make me so happy- don't they know that?”
Nagito's cheeks are a light pink again. The sight makes Hajime even happier, he looks so cute. His smile wavers momentarily, before he keeps it plastered on for Hajime’s sake. “Yes, of course they do,” Nagito replied after a moment, taking the cup from Hajime’s hands once he's done. He sets it to the side on a nearby table, before clasping one of Hajime’s hands. The action makes Hajime even happier, and he rocks from his toes to his heels. “I didn't mean what I said- Fuyuhiko is here to make you happy too.”
“I am?” Fuyuhiko asked stupidly, and Hajime giggles at his reaction. Then, the yakuza is smiling, too, and Hajime is grinning again. “Yes, I am!” He laughs, and even though it sounds forced, it makes Hajime even happier.
“I'd be happy to go with you to the hospital!” Hajime said with a small giggle. “Let's go!”
He dances forward, all but dragging Nagito along behind him. Fuyuhiko let out a noise of shock and hurried to follow them.
The way to the hospital was a long one. Partly due to Hajime stopping every few seconds to look at something that particularly stuck out to him, and largely due to him falling over, suddenly too tired to walk on his own.
Nagito and Fuyuhiko stood over him, both frowning at him as he sprawled across the ground beneath them. He rolls his head side to side, still unable to stop grinning as his legs and entire body ache . But it's okay, that doesn't matter when their worry for him makes him so happy!
“I think I'll stay here, I'm very happy to!” Hajime told them, breathing heavily before laughing loudly again(no he doesn't want to laugh again please don't make him laugh again). “The ground is so comfortable it's making me even happier!”
Fuyuhiko growls with his clear unhappiness, and Hajime’s eyes snap to his angry expression. “Goddammit, this is taking for fucking ever,” he muttered. “Hinata, get your ass up!”
“Now now,” Nagito said appeasingly, his hands held up in a calming manner. He's smiling now as he sits beside Hajime on the ground. Hajime grins up at him, happy that he was joining him on the ground. He's so comfortable here, even if the ground is horribly rigid, and he was burning up under the sun’s glare(he feels like he's going to pass out). “I'm sure Hajime just needs a break. We’re both happy to wait for him to go to the hospital again. Right, Kuzuryu?”
And if Hajime hadn't been watching, he wouldn't have noticed the moment of Nagito’s eyes sharpening almost unnoticeably, and Fuyuhiko’s shoulders hunching in admission.
“No, of course we don’t,” Fuyuhiko said with a groan, plopping down on Hajime’s other side. Hajime grins at him, and with shaking hands, he sloppily grabs both of their hands. He could feel Fuyuhiko flinch before taking hold of his in return, while Nagito’s somehow still cold hand instantly wrapped around his.
“Just take your time to catch your breath, Hajime,” Nagito said soothingly, and his thumb traces circles along his knuckles. Hajime likes the sensation, and he focuses on it, his grin relaxing a few fractions to be a small smile(thank god it doesn't hurt as bad).
They remain there for a while, Hajime wasn't keeping track of the time, until he informs them, “I want to make you happy by going to the hospital, but I don't think I can walk anymore. I'm sorry. But I am still happy!” He has to assure them that he's still happy, because he is still happy(he can't move his limbs are led his chest is burning his throat is aching). He's happy to lay there with them and never move again, in fact.
“Don't worry, it won't be a problem,” Nagito tells him gently, and looks over to Fuyuhiko. He's still smiling, and it makes Hajime happy. He has such a pretty and calming smile. “Kuzuryu and I can help you get there.”
“Goddammit,” Fuyuhiko mumbled, before saying, “Yes, we can help you walk, Hinata. We'd be happy to.” It sounds forced, still, but Hajime is happy he's trying to appease him, even if it is fake. Oh, when had Hajime started sweating? He must look disgusting. He laughs at the thought. “Wish he wasn't laughing so damn much…”
Hajime doesn't reply to that, too focused on Nagito standing, the taller boy tugging on his hand in the process. Fuyuhiko stands as well as Hajime works his legs, even as they protest. He sluggishly puts them underneath himself, and, with Nagito’s help, he finally gets to his feet, nearly falling over again. But Fuyuhiko catches him, helping him to get steady again.
“I'm so happy you two are helping me,” Hajime said, panting heavily(he wants to fall over again let him fall let him pass out please he doesn't want to be awake). “Thank you so much!”
“It's not a problem, Hajime,” Nagito reassured. Hajime grins at him, and he offers a small smile in return.
Once Hajime is as balanced as he's going to get, both Nagito and Fuyuhiko help urge him back on the right path. It takes them a while longer to get there, and when they do, Mikan is waiting for them.
“Wh- what took y-you guys so long?” she stammered. Sonia waves to them politely, standing towards the back of the waiting room. “We g- got the other two dressed and r- resting already.”
“Hajime just needed a short rest on the way,” Nagito informs Mikan with a small smile. Hajime groans in pain, contradicting the large smile still glue to his face. He leans heavily against Nagito as he's hit with yet another wave of exhaustion, his head coming to rest on the taller boy’s shoulder. Nagito doesn't say anything about it, and Hajime is happy to stay there. Happy to even fall asleep. He's even beginning to doze, Nagito’s soft scent lulling him.
But only a few seconds later he's being shaken awake. His eyes open sluggishly, and he's in a new room, sitting on a bed of some kind. The lighting is dim and fluorescent, and Nagito is crouched in front of him. Cool air nips at his suddenly bare chest, and he looks down to find his shirt is neatly folded on a chair nearby. Nagito is working on removing his shoes and socks, his long fingers working nimbly. He also takes notice of a nearby pole holding an IV bag, and traces the tube from the bag to where the needle is sticking from his arm. Must be medicine, since they think he's sick. The idea of that makes him happy that theyre worried enough about him to give him medicine.
“Where are we?” Hajime asked, his voice slurring together. He's half naked, cold, and alone with Nagito in an unfamiliar room with the door closed. Oh, and the other boy is basically undressing him. Normally he'd be horrified by this particular scenario, and deep down he might be, but he's just happy. Happy to be inside where it's cool, happy to finally be sitting on a comfy surface, and happy to be with Nagito in the first place.
“We’re in your hospital room, Hajime,” Nagito explained to him gently, setting his shoes and socks aside. He offers the other boy a shaky smile, one that doesn't quite reach his eyes, and Hajime’s happiness muddled mind can't understand or even notice it. “I'm sorry that I undressed you thus far- I'm sure you'll want to take a hot shower to be rid of my touch later.” He pauses, and his smile grows larger, more forced. Hajime’s smile grows wider in return at the sight, and he reaches a hand out blindly, and his smile doubles when Nagito takes it in his own once more. He has such a nice smile. And nice hands. His hands are so soft and cool. “But you need to change into a hospital gown. Do you want any more help?”
When Hajime doesn't answer instantly- he's so tired, and his cheeks hurt, but he keeps smiling anyway- Nagito is quick to add, “Oh, why would I even assume that? You wouldn't want help from someone like me, anyway! I'm so sorry no one else was able to help you, I'm sure you'd rather another-”
“I'd be very happy if you helped me more,” Hajime said, his voice thick with a drawl. Nagito stops in his self deprecating rambling and instantly nods in response. He's still smiling, like Hajime was. Hajime really appreciated it(he knows he knows he can't stop he's smiling too but it hurts he's sorry).
Nagito wraps an arm around his shoulders, and, once more displaying his hidden strength, he helps Hajime stand up. He moves back a step to allow him room to remove his pants, and averts his eyes, but Hajime doesn't mind too much. He's happy that Nagito is willing to help him so much, and he's even happier that he's handing him the gown he’d be wearing for the foreseeable future. Once it's draped around his shoulders, he allows Nagito’s nimble hands to tie it tightly shut.
The other boy’s cheeks are a bright pink now, and that same pink has spread to the tip of his nose and the shells of his ears, and he's avoiding eye contact. Hajime thinks it's cute, and it makes him happy. His grin is unbearable now as he takes both of Nagito’s hands, swinging them back and forth.
“You make me so happy, Ko,” Hajime said, using the nickname he rarely used for the other boy. Nagito jumps in surprise at the usage, his widening eyes snapping to his face. Hajime can't stop himself from giggling at the action, and hardly notices Nagito slowly guiding him to the bed again. “I love you so much- you're so cute and pretty!” (stop talking shut up he's going to know now oh god shut up)
He's being pushed to lay down now, and he doesn't fight it. He's happy to finally(finally please shut up please stop moving please sleep) laying down, his exhausted body sinking into the thin mattress beneath him.
“Haha,” Nagito chuckled, and he uses one of his hands to brush Hajime’s hair from his face. Hajime likes that. It felt good and it makes him happy inside, despite the fact his chest and lungs are aching from his earlier laughing fits. “I know you don't mean any of that, it's the disease talking- but thank you so much for saying that to trash like me.”
And suddenly, for a blessed, beautiful few seconds, the painful smile on Hajime’s face falls, and ignoring his now throbbing cheeks and chest and body, he sits up and jabs a finger in the other boy’s chest. “I mean all of that,”(stop talking please stop talking) he said seriously, not a hint of his previous happiness on his face. “I may not fully understand you, and you've made me angry a few times before, but that doesn't make what I said any less true.”(oh god he knows now) And that's when the cursed grin returns in full force(it fucking hurts), seeming to blind Nagito, his eyes darting to the floor. “But you make me extremely happy either way!”
The pink on Nagito’s face darkness to a light red, and the white haired boy stutters. Hajime finds it adorably amusing, and he makes sure to thread his fingers through Nagito’s, to ensure they're holding hands again.
“It would make me… very happy…” Hajime mutters, the exhaustion finally getting to him(it's been affecting him all he wanted to do was sleep why is it only working now). “...if you stayed… with me…”
Nagito’s breath caught, and Hajime wanted to ask why, to understand why what he said baffled him, but his eyes were slipping shut. And, as soon as they are shut, he's knocked out. Must have been the IV.