Chapter Text
Ahsoka trailed behind Senator Padme Amidala as she followed the Separatist, Mina Bonteri. She tried – and failed – to hide her distrust from her features, from her posture.
It was hard, Ahsoka reasoned, to relax around one’s sworn enemy.
Though Mina Bonteri, for all she was a Separatist, didn’t seem like Dooku, or Ventress, or Grievous.
She seemed… human.
Ahsoka shook her head and forced herself to focus on the conversation between Padme and Mina.
“He’s grown so much, Mina,” Padme was saying.
She was, of course, referring to Mina Bonteri’s son, Lux.
“Time won’t stop, even if we are at war,” Mina replied smoothly. “And I’m afraid these events are shaping his young life.”
Ahsoka simply couldn’t help herself.
She was, after all, Anakin Skywalker’s Padawan.
“With all due respect, as a Separatist, didn’t you create this war?” Ahsoka demanded, her voice heavy with accusation.
“Ahsoka!” Padme admonished.
But Mina merely hushed her friend, turning to the Togrutan Padawan before her.
“It’s alright,” Mina assured Padme. “That’s a very polarized point of view, my dear. Would it surprise you to know that many of the people you call Separatists feel the same way about the Republic and the Jedi?”
Ahsoka didn’t reply.
“Lux’s father was like that,” Mina continued. “A year ago next week, he was setting up a base on Aargonar when clones attacked. My husband fought bravely in self-defense, but was killed.”
The Republic – the clones – the Jedi – they wouldn’t…
But they would, wouldn’t they?
“Excuse me,” Ahsoka breathed. “I think I’ll get some air.”
Ahsoka turned and left the room without hesitation, only her training – and her lingering uncertainty about being on a Separatist planet – keeping her from physically running from Mina’s revelation.
She barely noticed Lux lounging on the stairs as she passed him, her thoughts swirling with uncertainty and confusion.
“You’re a Jedi, aren’t you?” Lux asked, his voice hesitant.
Ahsoka paused.
“Yes, why do you ask?”
“Before the was, I was always told Jedi were good,” Lux explained. “Now, I don’t know anymore. There are a lot of terrible things happening, a lot of killing. And my friends are saying that the Jedi are to blame.”
“I’m the first Jedi you’ve ever met, aren’t I?”
“Well, um… Yes.”
“Look at me,” Ahsoka challenged. “I’m not so bad, am I?”
And look he did.
Ahsoka was glad that the young Separatist was likely unaware of Togrutan biology as he blatantly scanned her form, taking longer than strictly necessary to observe certain areas. Her lekku flushed a darker blue, and Ahsoka internal scolded herself for the reaction.
Lux might be a teenage boy, and he was certainly attractive – for a human – but he was a Separatist.
“No, not bad at all.”
“Urgh,” Ahsoka rolled her eyes. “Well, it seems boys are the same whether they’re Republic or Separatist.”
Ahsoka turned to leave – but Lux wasn’t done yet.
“Wait! How many Separatists have you met?”
“What?”
“Well, I mean, you think we’re all the bad guys,” Lux reasoned as he fell into step beside her. “But how many of us have you actually met?”
“Well, other than military officers like Grievous and Ventress… none, I guess,” Ahsoka admitted. “You and your mother are the first.”
“Well, look at me,” Lux invited. “Am I so bad?”
Ahsoka didn’t do him the disservice of perusing his figure the way he had hers – never mind that she had already done plenty of observing when they first arrived.
“No, you’re not so bad after all.”
~~~
Ahsoka flopped onto the bunk beside Rex, loosing a tense sigh.
Her ori’vod, sensing her frustration, pulled her against him, gently wrapping her up. Ahsoka snuggled closer gratefully, savouring the warmth and safety of the clone’s embrace.
“Where have you been?” Rex asked gently.
“I accompanied Senator Amidala to Raxus.”
Rex stiffened beside her, turning fully to stare at his vod’ika.
“Raxus Secundus?” Rex implored incredulously. “The planet that currently serves as the capital for the Confederacy of Independent Systems – the Separatists – that Raxus?”
Ahsoka nodded sagely, settling herself back under Rex’s arm before she responded.
“It is also renowned for its beauty, temperate climate, and beautiful oceans oceans,” Ahsoka reasoned lightly.
“Somehow, I highly doubt that you were there to admit it’s beauty,” Rex grumbled.
“No,” Ahsoka admitted with a sigh. “Senator Amidala and I smuggled ourselves onto Raxus aboard a transport from Mandalore to meet with the senator of the Japrael sector, Mina Bonteri.”
“Do I dare ask why?”
Ahsoka sighed again, her frustration – and disappointment – leaking out.
“To discuss peace.”
“Peace?”
Ahsoka heard the hope – and fear – in her ori’vod’s voice.
Hope, that an end to the war would bring an end to the deaths of his vod’e.
Fear, of what would become of verde without a war to fight.
“It doesn’t matter, not anymore,” Ahsoka admitted. “Mina campaigned for peace – It seemed as though the Separatists were even willing to open peace talks with the Republic, but…”
Rex knew what happened next.
“But General Grievous attacked Coruscant.”
“Yes,” Ahsoka agreed. “The Senate won’t hear of peace now. They’ve deregulated the banks, ordered more Clone Troopers… everything in the name of war.”
“And you?” Rex asked softly. “How do you feel?”
“I realized something, while on Raxus,” Ahsoka admitted. “The politics of this war are not as black and white as I once thought they were.”
Rex looked down at Ahsoka again, his expression questioning.
“How so?”
“Mina Bonteri said that many of the Separatists feel the same way about the Republic and the Jedi as we feel about them,” Ahsoka explained. “And from what I saw – from what I’ve seen during this war… I’m not sure that they’re wrong to feel that way.”
When Rex didn’t speak, Ahsoka continued.
“The Jedi are meant to be keepers of the peace, yet we continue to fight in this war,” Ahsoka explained. “In some ways – many ways – we have become nothing more than soldiers.”
“Ahsoka…”
“Rex, I worry that the Jedi have lost our way,” Ahsoka whispered. “That we’ve become just as responsible for this conflict as those we fight against.”
Rex cradled Ahsoka as she came apart in his arms, shaking violently.
“Vod’ika,” Rex soothed. “I won’t tell you that you are wrong – not when many of our vod’e have asked the same questions that you ask now. We were born – created – to fight this war…”
“And yet?”
“Many of us wish it never happened,” Rex admitted. “Wish that we didn’t have to see our vod’e fall in battle – or as victims of their own heartbreak.”
Ahsoka sighed again, finally voicing the question that weighed most heavily on her heart.
“What’s the point of all of this?”
“I don’t know, vod’ika - I don’t think anybody knows,” Rex admitted. “But I do know that someday this war is going to end.”
“What happens to us then?”
“Well, I imagine that then you’ll have plenty more free time to spend with Mina Bonteri’s rather dashing son,” Rex teased. “What was his name again? Lux?”
Ahsoka twisted in Rex’s arms, her expression incredulous.
“How did you know?”
“The GAR – and the jetiise – have eyes and ears everywhere, vod’ika,” Rex chuckled. “Including on Raxus Secundus. Especially on Raxus Secundus.”
“Lux just confirmed what I already knew,” Ahsoka grumbled. “Boys are the same whether they’re Republic or Separatist.”
Rex chuckled.
“For what it’s worth, I heard that he found you quite attractive as well.”
Ahsoka cursed the fact that her ori’vod was fully aware of Togrutan biology as her lekku flushed a darker blue.
Rex merely laughed again.