Chapter Text
“It was quite possibly the most exquisite novel I’ve had the pleasure of laying my eyes on!” Xingqiu finished, bright eyed and eagerly looking to Chongyun for a response.
“Uh...Yeah, it sure sounds like it,” Chongyun shyly dipped his head, a smile curving faintly at his lips. Unable to meet Xingqiu’s elated expression, he focused on a firefly circling a patch of grass, over and over. The night time atmosphere at Luhua pool was oddly romantic, and hearing Xingqiu talk about his newest romance novel was failing to relieve the tightness Chongyun felt in his chest.
Chongyun pondered the advantages of the sappy relationship in the novel Xingqiu described. Something about pretending to date someone you hate for social status and inevitably falling in love. Not that he hated Xingqiu, but the exorcist couldn’t help but wonder if he could get Xingqiu to fall in love with him in a similar situation. He’d dreamt of dating the boy many a time, but failed to see why the playful bookworm would ever wish to pursue him romantically.
Chongyun hoped his rapid heartbeat wouldn’t be heard in the calming silence of night. His eyes slowly turned upwards, past Xingqiu’s moving mouth and up to the Sandbearer tree they were sitting under.A flurry of fireflies flew lazily around the leaves of the tree, as if someone had spent the time to individually hang lights from the branches.
Realizing he tuned out Xingqiu, Chongyun silently cursed himself for being absent of mind. His diligence training had taught him better than this. He mastered his expression back to neutral but politely intrigued and looked back to Xingqiu, right as he was saying, “And, because I figure my parents are going to match me with some witless girl soon, I should practice kissing!”
Chongyun nodded, dryly saying, “Well I feel sorry for your pillow. As inanimate as it is, your lack of technique shall still make it suffer.”
Xingqiu dramatically gasped, holding a hand to his heart. “Dearest Chongyun! Was that a joke you just told?”
Archons above, Chongyun must have been out of it. Practically every joke he had ever made had been directed towards Xingqiu, who always gave an overdramatic response. It was a well practiced routine by now. Xingqiu always had a habit of chipping down his walls and he feared one of these days they’d fall completely and he'd be lost in his positive energy. And after working so hard to build them up. Carefully placing the brick that Xingqiu managed to knock down back into his mental wall, Chongyun just stared back blankly.
Xingqiu huffed, clearly upset he couldn’t get a larger response from Chongyun, “Well obviously I’d need to acquire another human so I could get feedback. And who better to ask than you!”
The exorcist tried to not let the shock show on his face as he murmured “What?”
“We’re such close friends it wouldn’t be awkward...probably. And besides, you're going to need to kiss girls someday as well, so you could practice controlling your yang energy!”
Well, that was a good point, but the issue was Chongyun wasn’t sure he was into girls. He wasn’t even sure he was into boys entirely, just one boy in particular.
“I...I don’t know how this would be advantageous to you. You’re stuck kissing a guy and having to deal with my yang energy if I lose control.”
He knew his final point was null, considering how much Xingqiu enjoyed getting a rise out of him, yet he felt compelled to state it nonetheless. Xingqiu smiled easily as he gave his response.
“Well, as I said, dear Chongyun, I must know how to kiss within the near future so if I get engaged I don’t make a fool of myself. And really, I don’t care if you’re a guy because it’s not like we’re doing anything bad.”
If I get engaged. That stung slightly.
“Beside the point I was previously making, me being a guy should help even more with your yang energy. Easier to not lose control when it’s not someone you’re attracted to. Although for practice you might want to imagine me as whatever girl you like. You never seem to talk about her and I must admit, I’m a bit jealous to not be privy to the secret. Are we not the closest of friends, Chongyun?”
If only the studious idiot knew the irony of his words. All the way from ‘not someone you’re attracted to’ to ‘closest of friends’. If only he knew.
“Of course we’re friends Xingqiu, it’s just...I don’t know if I can do this.”
But can he really pass up this opportunity? He might never be able to kiss Xingqiu again. He slowly opened his mouth again, “I...I agree I would need to learn to control my yang energy. But we’d need some ground rules...so let me just...think about it.”
Xingqiu had known him long enough to know that ‘let me think about it’ means he would say yes tomorrow.
---
Chongyun sat outside an antique shop in Liyue harbor, waiting for Xingqiu. He needed to address the topic of last night’s conversation before they made to rendezvous with Xiangling and Wanmin Restaurant. She wanted to try some new dishes out with them, which means he would inevitably be eating something containing jueyun chili.
Maybe he should have saved this conversation for after lunch. He didn't know if he could control his yang energy for two emotionally damaging encounters back to back. This thought process, however, was shattered when two pale and immaculately groomed hands covered his eyes.
“Guess who!” came a laughing, boyish voice from behind him.
Chongyun could only groan as he responded “Why do you think this is funny?”
“Well you never expect it, my dearest-”
“You do this every time we meet, you idiot”
A giggle pushed its way past thin lips as Xingqiu stepped out from behind the exorcist.
“You still love me regardless!”
How could he say such embarrassing things so simply? How was Chongyun supposed to reply? Should he just not reply? Before he could think better of it, he murmured “sure” as Xingqiu stared expectantly back.
There was an awkward silence between them as Xingqiu grasped at ways to keep the conversation going.
“...Sure? I mean it’s better than no! But to an on-looker it doesn’t even seem like we’re friends!”
This constant stress on how much they were friends was really starting to give Chongyun chest pain in the worst kind of way. Especially because it seemed Xingqiu was mentioning it more and more recently. Had Xingqiu figured out how he felt? Was this his cruel way of teasing him for it? But then, why would he suddenly ask to kiss him. None of this made sense to Chongyun, and he thought he may perhaps have been doing a bit of overthinking.
Chongyun suddenly realized he’d remained silent for much too long, and Xingqiu was waving a hand in front of his face. Doing his best imitation of Xingqiu’s voice, Chongyun tried to dispel the tension.
“Oh my dearest Xingqiu, I ponder the thought of my idiosyncratic yet undying love for you during every hour of the day, and have come to the conclusion I need not be abstentious. I proudly shout mine love for you, considering how callipygous you are!”
Xingqiu looked nothing short of delighted as he practically shouted, “CHONGYUN! You did not just make two jokes in the same four turns of the clock! Do you really think my buttocks are that grand? To justify a confession? Where in the world did you learn such words anyways!”
“You did not just say ‘four turns of the clock’. And I...might...read some of your books after you fall asleep…”
“Awe, Yun-Yun that's so cute!”
Chongyun did not think he could turn a darker shade of crimson but the nickname and ‘cute’ proved him very, very wrong. He looked at his toes and quietly said, “I must keep up with your intellect somehow”.
Xingqiu simply laughed and grabbed his arm, dragging him to the southern end of the harbor, towards Wanmin Restaurant. Chongyun tried his best to slow their rapid progress to the impending meal that was...well, that was lunch.
“Uh wait...Xingqiu.” Hearing his name, the boy halted to a stop, knowing smile on his face.
“Yes?” he said, innocent tone betrayed by the glimmer of malice in his eyes.
“I...I wanted to speak about yesterday's conversation,” Chongyun stared intently on his own feet. “I think it would be beneficial to both of us, but we need to lay down some ground rules. Thus, it would be best if you drafted a list then we could talk about it to edit. However, if at any point you’re uncomfortable we can stop. I mean we’re best friends! Right? We can’t break that bond. Unless you want to. Not that you would want to! Why would you want to? As I was saying we should just do what we’re comfortable with and will be good for both of us!”
The words fell out of him like a waterfall, cascading out from his mouth like he couldn’t stop them. He hoped his quick delivery would hide the real reason he wished to do this. It was so selfish of him, but at least he was helping Xingqiu with something he needed to know how to do, right?