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I look down at the red badge in my hand. The tiny propeller on the metal airplane spins in the breeze. I can feel Charlotte’s gaze on me, tender and unavoidable. My throat hurts, a sob waiting to burst out of my mouth as soon as I open it. Charlotte must feel me tense up, because she puts a gentle arm around my shoulders.
“Elizabeth, you’re my home base. I’m always going to come back to you.” She touches my hand and bends my fingers around the badge, leaving her hand curled around mine.
All this time, I thought maybe she was just teasing me. Each time she had led me somewhere by the hand, I had let go, thinking that the action meant something different to me than it did to her. Every secretive smile, I had reasoned, was just her mischievous personality. But here she is, honesty in those amber eyes, putting words to those feelings I didn’t dare to name. She’s speaking in metaphors, but I finally understand.
I turn my body towards her, fixing my gaze on her face. I swallow, blink back my tears, and take the leap.
“Are you really saying—do you love me, Charlotte Harris?”
She grins, her eyes crinkling with joy and maybe a bit of relief. “I thought you’d never pick up on it, Colvin. Your investigative spirit seems not to focus on secrets that are right before your eyes.”
I give her a tiny smack on the cheek, and don’t pull my hand away. “Don’t insult the moneymaker! I thought you were like that with all the girls.”
A wrinkle appears between Charlotte’s eyebrows. I’m close enough to see every beautiful line. “You’re the only one for me. Ever since that ball, you in your pretty pink dress—but please, Elizabeth, tell me you feel the same. My heart’s in your hands here! Don’t leave me in suspense.”
For a moment, I’m tempted to. Didn't she just leave me to worry for a whole day as she flew the most challenging flight in history? Hadn’t I spent a day in my own personal hell, not knowing if she would make it to the pit stop, imagining her little yellow plane nosediving into the wide, unforgiving ocean? But I’m not cruel, although maybe she is. Maybe I should be, after what she put me through. Maybe I could be, in another universe. But in the here and now, I’m relieved, tired, and about to confess my love to the woman who’s occupied my dreams since undergrad.
“Charlotte, I love you. I want to be the one you come home to. I want you to always find rest in my arms.”
She takes me up on it immediately, leaning forward and crushing me in a hug. My hands land on her back, flat against her strong shoulders. I breathe in her sweet cologne and move them up slowly, revelling in the soft skin of her neck where it peeks through the bandages. I caress her dark hair. It’s a bit greasy from her adventure and subsequent hospital stay, but it parts softly under my fingers.
After a long moment, she pulls away and looks around us. The only other person in the garden is a nurse who averts her eyes and makes her way into another area. Such a fancy hospital must prioritize their patients’ privacy. For a moment, I think of Jessica, and her final days in the mental hospital. Charlotte will never have to endure such treatment because of her father’s wealth and connections. It’s a sobering thought, but I tuck it away for later. I can have this moment away from the case that has taken over my whole life.
She speaks softly to me. “We’re alone here.” I know what she wants, and I want it, too. I gather my courage. I’ve never kissed a woman—I’ve dreamed of it almost every night, but never had the guts to enter this side of society. Loving Charlotte means giving up a certain semblance of normalcy. It may lose me friends; it will definitely have to be a secret from my family. I’m ready to take that step, for her. And besides, I think I may have a few friends who will gladly accept me into their circles.
Charlotte’s eyes are closed. She’s waiting for me. I lean forward and brush her lips with mine. It’s short, and soft, and dry, and I want to do it again, so I do. I press a little harder, and she puts a hand on my waist. Electricity zaps from her hand into my stomach, and I feel my heart thumping. We’re doing so little—I’ve gone further than this with a few college boyfriends, and I’m sure she has, too—but it’s so much more intense than anything I’ve ever done with anyone else.
She pulls back and stares into my eyes, then presses her forehead to mine. I cover the hand on my waist with one of my own, and cup her cheek with the other. I kiss her again, and she kisses me back, again and again, fast little kisses that make me giggle. She kisses up to my cheek, across the bridge of my nose, down again to my lips.
The fire in my gut is calming down as we laugh, and I’m almost feeling normal again when she moves a hand to my thigh and squeezes. I gasp involuntarily, and feel my face redden. “All right, we may be alone, but we won’t be for long, and you’re still injured!” Charlotte tries to interrupt me, no doubt to complain that she isn’t hurt at all, but I put a finger to her lips and she goes a bit cross-eyed. “Miss Harris, when you are healed up you had better take me out for a proper dinner.”
“Only the best!” she cries. “Nothing but caviar and champagne for my girl. You just wait until this damn hospital lets me go.”
I grin, remembering how uncomfortable I was when she first took me to eat at a fancy restaurant. Now that I know the motive behind her treating me, I appreciate the gift for what it was. “We’ll have to see what happens after that, won’t we. I don’t think I’ve shown you my apartment, my dear.” My little room doesn’t hold a candle to the Harris mansion, but it has a pleasant view… and a comfortable bed.
I push Charlotte away teasingly as she brings her face to mine, asking for another kiss. “Don’t strain yourself, Charlotte. I have to go and finish my article on the Light Cup and your stunning emergency landing. Once it’s on the presses, I’ll have time to relax with you.”
She holds onto my hand as I stand, brushing out my skirt inefficiently with my free hand. “I’ll heal up fast for you, Colvin. Wear that badge for me, and phone me here at the hospital every night ‘till I’m out. Hearing your voice will make me strong.”
My heart bursts with love for this woman. I think she can see it on my face, because she smiles as bright as her old yellow plane and kisses my hand like a prince. There’s a skip in my step as I leave the hospital, and the red airplane badge shines on my lapel.