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Chapter Text

Someone tripped over his feet.

Immediately Warriors sat up from his blankets, brandishing the dagger he hid under his pillow. He hoped the loud, beastly noise that came out of his mouth sounded intimidating. In truth his eyes were still shut and his brain was still half-asleep. "MMmmHMM?"

A short chuckle came from above him. "Sorry about that, Cap," said Hyrule. "My bad."

"Auuugh?" Warriors said again. He still waved the knife around. "Rahrahrah!"

Hyrule reached down and plucked the knife out of his hand, replacing it with a warm mug. "Here," Hyrule said. "Drink this. It will wake you up."

"Rah?" Warriors was dimly aware it was some coffee. He always had a cup in the morning as soon as he woke up. He mumbled what he thought was a thank you, and brought the mug close. His lips smacked in anticipation. He took a long, deep sip.

Warrior's eyes flew open and quickly turned his head, spitting out the offensive liquid from his mouth. He gagged and heaved. "That tasted like dog piss!"

"Hey!" Hyrule protested. "I worked real hard on my coffee!"

"That's what you consider coffee?"

"Don't be dramatic." Hyrule rolled his eyes and took the mug back. "But now that you're awake, come over. I'm making breakfast."

"Oh lord..." He rubbed the gunk out of his eyes and stood up, letting his blankets fall off of him. He yawned and stretched, cracking the bones in his back. "Why are you making breakfast? Where's Wild?"

"Still asleep," said Hyrule, taking his place back at the cooking pot. Inside the pot something flesh-colored was bubbling thickly. "So I thought I'd do the nice thing and give him a break and make breakfast myself."

The pot suddenly burst into flames.

"Oh no, not again-!"

Warriors watched the theatrics for a few seconds and then turned away, rubbing a hand over his face to rid the sleep. He turned towards the bundle of blankets that was Wild-shaped and wandered over. Wild wasn't far away but Warriors was still half-asleep. He yawned and blinked wearily, his feet shuffling on the grass. He passed Twilight and Time, who were coming back from the river bank. Their faces were freshly glistening from their morning shave.

Twilight noticed Warrior's destination. "Let him sleep. We can do one morning without him cooking."

Warriors only had to point to the cooking pot. Hyrule hummed happily as he stirred the pot vigorously, spilling splatters of stew onto the grass below. The grass began sizzling.

"Ah..." Twilight said. "Never mind."

With Daddy-Twi's approval in hand, Warriors kneeled down to Wild's bundle of blankets. A smile quirked on his lips. The kid was wrapped up in his blankets like a cat. Only the top of his head peeked out, showing off his honey-wheat hair. Unlike the others who slept with arms and legs spread out, Wild liked to curl in on himself, burrowing deep into his own warmth. Warriors felt a little bad needing to wake him. Only a little.

"Hey Wild," said Warriors. He reached out and shook the hidden shape. "Time to wake up and save us from hunger and food poisoning. Hey. Hey."

The blankets shook and rumbled. Slowly the head rose up and Warriors pulled back his hand. "Sorry for waking you. I can make it up to you with-"

Wild sat up, the blankets slipping off. He yawned and stretched and rubbed at his eyes. "Hmmm?"

"Um..." Warriors said. Slowly he called out over his shoulder, "Uh... guys...? We have a situation."

Eight year old Wild was still rubbing at his eyes. His face scrunched up at the effort, his tiny button nose sniffling. His fat cheeks were devoid of burn scars. His perfectly shaped ears were also missing his piercings. His hair was shorter, flopping down to his neck. He blinked, finally waking full, his bright blue eyes staring straight at was no recognition in them.

"What's... going on...?" Wild said softly. Realization struck him and he gasped, shoving himself to his feet. He may have reverted back to his youth but his clothes had not. His beloved blue champion tunic sat on him like a dress and his trousers barely hung onto his hips. "Who are you?" He demanded. "Where am I? Where's my dad?"

By now the others had come over, gaping at the sight. Immediately Warriors regretted his decision to call them as their sudden presence wasn't helping the situation. Wild moved further back, his confusion and panic becoming more pronounced.

Legend asked, "How did this happen?"

"Did he shrink?" Sky said.

Twilight reached out towards his protege. "Wild, are you-?"

Wild flinched away from his hand. Wild's legs tangled around his over-sized trousers and he toppled over in an undignified heap. His dress-shirt flew up, exposing his derriere.

Warriors couldn't help it- he snorted.

Wild glanced over his shoulder, eyes wet from humiliation. He looked down upon his half-naked form, then up at the group who were staring right back as intensely. His eyes grew wider.

"RAPISTS!"

"Whoa!" Warriors said, holding up his hands in alarm. Everyone else had the same reaction, backing away immediately. "No, nobody here is like that-!"

"Help!" Wild screamed into the empty forest. In a panic he kicked off his trousers and scrambled to his feet. He had no trousers, no pants, no shoes, and his beloved Sheikah Slate was still sitting by his bedroll. Despite this, he took off running, still screaming into the forest. "Help! Rapists! Perverts! Degenerates!"

Everyone hesitated in going after him. After all was it wise to chase after a half naked boy who was convinced he was trying to get away from the worst of society? No matter their intentions, it was going to make things worse.

"Get out of my way!" Wind suddenly said, elbowing the others to move. "I'll go after him! You all figure out what happened!"

Chapter Text

Hyrule and Legend took to look at the cooking pot for clues. Perhaps their dinner last night had been tainted somehow. They ate delicious beef stew with big pieces of bread. A small fight had actually broken out over who'd get the last bits (Four won.) Sky ended up on dish duty. He said he didn't see anything out of the ordinary when he washed the pot. If there was any leftover evidence, it was destroyed when Hyrule used the pot to cook breakfast.

Speaking of, Epona had yet to eat herself. She was kicking at the dirt, a clear sign of aggravation. Time went to take care of her, giving her extra oats as an apology.

The Sheikah Slate was picked up by Twilight. He went off a ways from the group to search through its contents.

Four and Warriors decided to search through Wild's sleeping area. Besides a blanket, a pillow, and the thin futon Wild slept on, there's wasn't much to go through. Four stretched out the blanket, running a gloved hand over the fabric. Warriors was not as careful and shoved his hand into Wild's pillow, digging around the feathers. Finding nothing, he sighed and tossed the now ruined pillow aside. Unless there was a sheet of paper that said CHILD CURSE on it, he'd no idea what he should be looking for. He glanced over to Twilight tapping the Slate. His eyes narrowed.

"How come he gets to play with the slate?" Warriors asked.

"Cause Wild trusts him," said Four as he continued to inspect the blanket. "Not that hard to figure out."

"I'm not trustworthy?"

"You are known to go through his bags and mess with his stuff."

"I'm only teasing. I would never actually mishandle his things."

"Why do you want to play with his Slate all of a sudden?"

Warriors paused. He continued watching Twilight tap and swipe the Slate for a few seconds longer and then turned away. "I care about Wild too, you know. As a fellow soldier I know what he's been through, what he's seen. I have more in common with him than you think."

"But does he know that? Heck, when you found him this morning as a child, you didn't make any effort to help him calm down. Instead you laughed."

That accusation had Warriors hunching in guilt, feeling shame at his past actions. Not only for laughing but for everything else. Four was right, Warriors made little to no effort to be Wild's friend.

Four patted Warriors's arm. "Look at it this way: he doesn't allow me to touch his stuff either."

"Do you want to?"

"Nah. I wish him happiness but I've not the time to gain the level of trust Twi is at. I got my own inner demons to deal with."

"Hmm..." Warriors bent down and pulled back Wild's futon, inspecting the flattened grass underneath. Right there in the middle, right below where Wild's spine would've rested upon, was a small squished flower. Warriors reached down and plucked the frail bloom, holding it up to inspect it.

It was a little thing, like a new bud of spring. The color was the same as Warriors's scarf, a pretty royal blue, and the pollen was the color of gold. The delicate petals had been rubbed down from being slept on. "Do you know what flower this is?" Warriors asked.

Four looked. He shrugged. "No idea. You think it's something?"

"I didn't find anything else. Unfortunately our residential mountain man is MIA."

Warriors immediately noticed that Twilight was making his way to the edges of the camp, looking out to where Wild and Wind ran off to. Warriors shoved the flower into Four's hand and got up. "Take that to Legend. I want to talk to our Ranch Hand."

"Don't act too jealous!" Four said to his back.

Twilight was still staring out when Warriors walked up to him. The slate sat in Twilight's hands, his fingers rapping endlessly against it. "They're taking too long," he said. "I think something might've happened."

"It's only been a few minutes," said Warriors. "They're probably still talking. Did you find anything on the slate?"

"No," he said curtly. Twilight's lips tightened. He hooked the Slate to his belt and started forward. "I'm going after them."

"Hey-" Warriors reached out and grabbed his arm. "Wild thought the worst of us. If you come into that scene as aggressive as you are, you're going to trigger him into running again."

Twilight shrugged off his hold. "I don't need advice on how to handle my protege."

That hurt. Warriors said nothing as he watched Twilight went off in the direction of Wind.

Warrior's felt anger rising in him and he didn't know why. Though he and Twilight were the same age (Warriors was four months older, thank you) Warriors felt like a chastised child who was told to go home. It was insulting his opinions- his valid critique wasn't taken seriously. If Twilight walked up to Wild in that mother-hen way of his, he was going to scare the boy worse. Did Warriors have a right to say anything though? He wasn't Wild's mentor.

"Well?" Four suddenly called out, startling him out of his self-doubt. "Why are you still standing there?"

Make an effort, Warriors was reminded. He chuckled. For a little guy, Four sure made a lot of good points. Warriors gave a brief nod, stood up taller, and took off, going across the field to follow the others.

Chapter Text

Warriors caught up to Twilight fairly quickly. "Stop walking so aggressively, you're going to scare Wild looking like that."

Twilight's brow darkened for a moment, clearly still thinking he and only he was allowed to approach the kid. His stubbornness held for a few seconds longer, and then he he let out a long slow breath, his face and body relaxing. He cracked his neck, loosening the tense in his shoulders. "Am I so scary?"

"You are wearing a dead animal on your shoulders."

He immediately reached up to take the pelt off and Warriors slapped his hands away.

"Stop, I wasn't being serious. Fur or no fur, we have our hands full. Do you think Wind got through to him?"

"I hope so. I'm great with kids, but this is a whole different situation."

"Great with kids?" Warriors grinned and elbowed Twilight's side. "Got something to say, Ranch hand?"

That got Twilight to smile. He pushed away Warrior's arm. "Not what you're thinking. My village has a lot of young children and I love spending time with them. I always wanted siblings."

"They're not as glamorous as you think. I have three older brothers and they're all pricks."

"You're not close to any of them?"

"No. I was a late addition to the family and by then all of my brothers were over the age of ten. They resented having to share the house with a colicky baby. They all moved out before I got a chance to get to know any of them, and when they came to visit, they ignored me."

"But you're a captain. Surely that would impress them."

"Perhaps. When I enlisted, I started as a grunt. I had no title nor was the pay all that impressive. My brothers all became bankers and are decently wealthy. They saw my profession as lowly. By the time I started moving up in ranks I was done with them. I haven't spoken to them in years."

"That's a shame to hear. The sailor is always going on about his sister. Glad to know he has a good relationship."

"Speaking of..." Warriors pointed. "There he is."

Warriors was imagining coming upon the kids sitting down on a log, the sailor talking to Wild and telling him all about their adventures. He imagined Wild finally calm and ready to listen. Over the past few months Wind had rarely talked to any kids near his age, so Warriors thought this would be the perfect opportunity for him to gain a new friend.

"YOU STUPID LITTLE BRAT! WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON YOU, I'M GONNA WRING THE LIFE OUT OF YOUR NECK!"

Wind was screaming upwards at a tree, shaking his fist to the gods. "TRY IT AGAIN!" He challenged. "TRY IT AGAIN!"

An acorn came shooting down, catching Wind in the eye. The boy bellowed and stumbled away, clutching his face as he continued his verbal assault. "YOU SON OF-!"

"Sailor," Twilight addressed him. "What's going on?"

Wind snapped his head up, revealing his face covered in small bloody scratches, his right eye red from the acorn. He pointed upward in the tree. "That snot-nose brat refuses to come down and has been pelting me with acorns every time I tried to climb up!"

From high above the tree a small voice declared out, "I SHALL NOT BELIEVE YOUR HALF-TRUTHS, YOU CHARLATAN!"

"Huh, where does he learn his vocabulary?" Warriors said, blocking the sun with his hand as he peered up. Wild had climbed a good forty feet into the tree. Like a cat who realized it climbed too high, Wild clung desperately around a branch and held on tight. Acorns were still in reaching distance, as demonstrated as Warriors moved out of the way to avoid getting smacked in the face with one. "Good aim."

Wind achingly nursed his eye. "He ran up there and got himself stuck, but he's refusing all help."

"Stubborn or not, we need to get him down," said Twilight, stepping up to the base of the tree. "A fall from that height could be deadly." He yelled up. "Hello! My name is Twilight! What's yours?"

"NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!" Wild yelled back.

"We're not here to hurt you! We just want to help!"

"LIES AND SCANDALS!"

"It's true! We can prove it! Just give us a chance-" An acorn came whistling down, bouncing off of Twilight's eye. "Gah-!"

"THERE'S MORE WHERE THAT CAME FROM!"

Twilight stumbled back, his face tight with pain. He pulled his hand away from his face, revealing droplets of blood on his fingers from where the acorn cut the bridge of his nose.

"You okay?" Warriors asked.

"I'm fine," Twilight said tightly. His right eye was closed and leaking tears. To Wind he asked, "Has he responded to any of your pleas?"

"I've tried," Wind said. "I told him I was only fourteen, a kid just like him, and he accused me of being an accomplice, that my job was to recruit new 'meat' as he calls it."

Warrior's lips thinned, the accusations of depravity weighing on him. As the minutes passed, more and more he regretted his laughing back at camp. He stepped forward. "We need more solid proof than our word. He mentioned his father. Is there a way we can use that?"

Twilight clearly didn't like that suggestion as his face hardened. He opened his injured eye, revealing splotchy red, and whispered harshly, "His father has been dead for a hundred years. You can't say that to him, not like this. It could do more worse than good."

"Give me a chance. I think I know how to help." Without waiting for Twilight's approval, Warriors came close to the tree and yelled upwards, "Child! I am Captain Kaji of her Majesty's Royal Army!"

From above Wild ceased his movement to throw another acorn. "You're a captain?"

To prove it, Warriors pulled forward his blue shawl, turning it over to show off the red and golden Hyrulian symbol stitched on it. "Do you recognize this?"

Wild nodded eagerly. "My dad has that same symbol!"

Another piece to the puzzle. In past conversations when Warriors had inquired about Wild's history, Wild admitted he didn't remember his parents. He only knew his father was a knight in the army, but beyond that it was a blank slate to him. It was interesting to know this child version of Wild remembered his father and his rank.

"That's right!" Warriors said. "Her Majesty wouldn't recruit deviants now would she?"

Warriors was lying through his fucking teeth; he was at a disadvantage, not knowing how smart Wild was. Horrible people were everywhere and Wild had every right to disbelieve him and his claim. Thankfully it looks like the Gods were gonna throw Warriors a bone as Wild's tight grip around the tree branch loosened.

"Are you going to take me to my dad?" Wild asked.

That little question entered Warrior's heart and settled in. Warriors may have had a terrible relationship with his siblings, he dearly loved his parents. He didn't know what he would do if he couldn't remember the way his father's eyes crinkled with pride on the day Warriors became a captain. Seeing Wild here, innocent and free from the burden of his future, hurt in ways Warriors couldn't comprehend. From the corner of his eye Warriors could see Twilight staring intensely, mentally screaming at him to treat his next words carefully.

Warriors let out a small breath. "I will do my best. I promise."

Chapter Text

“Are you able to get down?”

Warriors has seen Wild traverse up rock cliffs to get mushrooms for breakfast. He’s seen the kid hold his position for over an hour when it started to rain. As clumsy as he was, he was a superb rock climber. He knew how to get up and down safely.

Little Wild had not reached that stage of development yet. He tried to put out a naked foot to a crook of the tree trunk. He immediately lost his nerve and hugged the tree harder, shaking his head fiercely.

Warriors sighed. He wasn’t looking forward to climbing. “That’s okay! I’ll come up and get you!”

He took off any unnecessary items that could hinder his climb. He passed his blue shawl over to Twilight. “Wild may struggle. Ready yourself in case I lose my grip.”

“Don’t lose your grip then,” Twilight said, taking the shawl

“I’ll catch you!” Said Wind confidently.

Thankfully the tree was a lovely old thing, full of bumps and shapes, giving Warriors plenty of holds to choose from. With one last reassuring breath to himself, he heaved himself up and began the climb. Warriors wasn’t as fast as he needed to be but he kept moving. Sweat pebbled on his forehead as he kept telling himself to don’t look down. He had to look fearless in front of Wild afterall.

He’d be proud to say he got to Wild in less than five minutes of climbing. “Hey there,” Warriors said once he got to the trembling boy. At this height the wind was more obvious. The morning chill had yet to go away and Wild was still half-naked. His cheeks, the tips of his fingers and his exposed feet were all pink. “Ready to come down?”

Wild nodded. “Please don’t drop me,” he whispered.

“Never.”

He had Wild climb onto his back and wrap his arms around his neck. Wild’s baby arms weren’t big enough to choke him, though the pressure on his adam’s apple wasn’t entirely comfortable.

“Ready?” Warriors asked. Wild responded by burying his face into Warrior’s back.

The climb down was harder than going up. The extra weight, the pressure on his throat, and being unable to take longer strides made the climb slow. Didn’t help that Warriors had to look down to see his next foot hold. Going up took only a few short minutes. Going down felt like hours.

Wild began to slip.

Warriors could feel it. “Kid, tighten your grip!”

“I-I can’t-!” Wild gasped. His little hands scrabbled for purchase. “I’m slipping!”

Warriors let go of one of his holds and reached back to grab at Wild, hopefully to haul him back up. As soon as he reached around, Wild lost his grip and fell.

“NO!”

Warriors let go from his hold on the tree, pushed off and dove after him. Air rushed past his ears, deafening the world around him. Wild was screaming, his eyes shut, droplets of his tears splattering in Warriors cheeks as they fell.

With only a few feet to go, Warriors managed to catch up. He grabbed Wild, cradling the boy in his chest. He twisted and readied himself to land on his back to break Wild’s fall.

That didn’t happen. Within a foot of crashing into the ground below, they suddenly halted their descent, hovering in midair for a few precious seconds. A strange yellow glow covered their bodies. Just as quickly as it came, it left, the glow shattering into pieces, and Warriors fell to the forest floor in a heap. It wasn’t pleasant, but it wasn’t the bone shattering death he was anticipating.

“That was close,” Twilight said, putting away the Sheikah Slate.

“Are you two okay?” Wind asked.

Warriors peered down at the trembling child in his arms. He touched Wild’s messy hair. “Hey, it’s over now. You’re not hurt, are you?”

Wild lifted his head. Big blubbery tears fell down his fat cheeks. “I made a mistake.”

“What sort of mis-” Warriors felt wetness seep through his stomach. “Oh, that kind of mistake.”

Chapter Text

Wild refused to let go. He clung to Warriors like he was still up on that branch and any attempts to pull him off was met with firm resistance. It would be adorable if it wasn’t for A) his entire front was soaked through with pee. B) Twilight was staring holes into his back. Warriors knew the man was overprotective of his protege, but this level of intensity was unnerving. He swore he could feel eyeballs move across his back.

“I have clothes you can wear,” Wind told Wild as they made their way back to camp. “They may be a little big for you, but we can make it work.”

Wild didn’t answer him right away. He peeked out from where he hid his face in Warrior’s chest. 

“I apologize for hitting you with an acorn,” Wild said. “Please accept my deepest regrets for the violence I inflicted upon you.”

It was such a poignant and genuine apology Wind couldn’t help but be flustered as his cheeks turned rosy. “Oh! No worries! I should have dodged better! You have very good aim!”

Twilight picked up his pace to stand next to Warriors on the other side. He waited.

Wild did not turn to face him. Instead he buried his face back into Warriors’ chest and didn’t reammerge.

Warriors tried to help. He gave Wild a little jostle. “Hey, isn’t there another person you need to apologize to? You did hit two people with your acorns.”

Wild didn’t move but spoke, his voice muffled. “No.”

“Why not?”

“My father says you shouldn’t trust people with tattoos. Facial tattoos especially are a sign of instability and an inability to make smart and rational decisions.”

Warriors bit down on his lips to keep from laughing. He learned his lesson from earlier though the absurdity of it all made it difficult. Believing Twilight of all people he was untrustworthy and incompetent was absolute hilarity. Wild said it with such conviction, honestly it began to hurt on how hard Warriors was trying to keep a grin off.

Twilight certainly didn’t find it amusing. He winced and turned away, his face a little tight. Thrice now he’s been rejected by his protege. It must hurt.

Warriors cleared his throat. “That’s not nice nor is it true. Knights come in all shapes and sizes.”

Wild stubbornly said nothing, keeping his face hidden. Warriors sighed. Once they get back to camp hopefully the Master Sword can get this fixed and all will go back to normal. As normal as a group of goddess-chosen heroes could be.

When they got back to camp, everyone yelled in glee at the sight of them. They ran over, and as Wild tensed in Warrior’s arms, Warriors held up a hand. “Don’t crowd us. He’s still a little jumpy.”

“I’m glad to see everyone is back safely,” Said Time.

“I do see battle wounds. What happened to you guys?” Sky asked, eyeing the scratches and little blood splotches.

“Why does it smell like pee?” Hyrule asked. 

“Enough!” Warriors said. He stepped away amd bent down. It took a few careful seconds for Warriors to pull Wild away from his chest and set him on the grass. The boy was clearly too embarrassed to show his wet front and he hunched over, face burning. 

“Hey, none of that,” said Warriors.

“I’m ashamed of my actions,” Wild whispered. 

“You shouldn’t be. We both nearly died, anyone would pee their pants. But I promise you, nobody here will make fun of you. If they do, you tell me and I will see to the matter myself.”

That got a small smile out of Wild. He lifted his head and sniffled, wiping the leftover tear tracks from his red cheeks. “Understood.”

“Good. Now this young man over here is Wind. He’s going to take you to get some fresh clothes. Wind, can you also get Wild some food? I bet this growing boy is hungry.”

Wind nodded. He held out a hand to Wild. “C’mon, I got something that might fit you!”

Maybe the hand holding was condescending to the surprisingly mature child Wild was, or perhaps Wild was proving a point; either way, Wild refused Wind’s hand. Wild raised his chin. “Lead the way, my good man,” he said.

The group waited till the two were out of earshot. Time turned to Warriors. “Besides the stains and scratches, I assume no one is hurt.”

“The kid’s got one hell of an arm, but yeah, everything’s fine.”

Twilight scowled. “Except the fact Warriors promised Champion he’ll take him to see his father.”

Warriors closed his eyes in irritation as several gasps of shock were shared.

“His dad? The one who died ?”

“How can you promise him something like that? That’s like promising the moon!”

“What are you going to do if Wild finds out?”

Warriors grabbed a fresh shirt out of his bag and quickly shoved it on. “Quiet! All of you! I did what I had to do in the moment. What matters right now is he trusts me, and that’s good enough. All we need to do is get Wild to touch the Master Sword, and he’ll be back to normal in no time.”

This time it was Sky who frowned. “The Master Sword isn’t a cure for everything. You shouldn’t rely on it so heavily.”

Being reminded of his past mistakes had Warriors bristling. “We haven’t even tried it yet.” He pointed to Twilight. “And you! Just because the kid doesn’t like you doesn’t give you the right to make me look like the bad guy! If I left it up to you, Champion would still be up that fucking tree!”

The rivalry between Warriors and Twilight was usually lighthearted, their insults to each other as only friendly ribbing. Warriors thought after their conversation about family and children, they would be on the same side about this. Apparently Twilight losing his spot as “favorite” in Wild’s heart triggered him.

“We’re going to try the Master Sword,” Warriors continued. “What comes after that, we can deal with it. So unless any of you have a better idea, now’s the time to speak up.”

There was silence from the group. Twilight stubbornly glared on.

“That’s what I thought,” Warriors said. 

Chapter Text

Legend sat cross-legged on the grass with an open book on his lap. He was hunched over, flipping through the pages at a rapid pace. Occasionally he would pause and take a quick drink from his water flask, then resumed his intense studying. On the ground next to him, the delicate blue flower found earlier sat on a white handkerchief. 

“Anything?” Warriors asked.

Legend snapped the book shut, shoved it back in his bag and pulled out another one. “No,” he grumbled. “Magical flowers aren’t exactly my specialty. I don’t have many resources to pull from.”

“Thanks for looking anyways.”

“So how’s the kid?”

Warriors peered back at Wild and Wind. The two sat on a spread blanket, a bowl of fruit, bread, and jam between them. Thank goodness Wild had extra food in his bag otherwise he would have been subjected to Hyrule’s bubbling horror stew. Wild was finally smiling as he ate giant sliced pieces of bread with a generous helping of apricot jam. He was wearing clean clothes, though the pants had to be held up tightly with a belt. 

“I think he’ll be okay,” said Warriors. “It’s good to see he’s finally calmed down.”

“...And how are you doing? You’ve got this pinched look to your face for a while now.” 

Warriors felt his face stiffen even more. “Maybe once the Ranch Hand gets his head out of his ass and apologize, I might actually calm down.”

“His words really got to you.”

“Ugh.” Warriors was not known to lash out in anger. It was his duty as Captain to always keep a cool head. He never drank heavily, never indulged in drugs, never went home with someone of questionable behavior. Even in his youth he often walked away from friends who would egg him on to throw the first punch. “Do you think what I did was right?”

Legend shrugged. “I don’t think what you did was wrong .”

“Maybe I could’ve found a better way than promise him the world.”

Laughter caught Warrior’s attention. He looked back at Wild and Wind, and the two were throwing pieces of bread up into the air and trying to catch it with their mouths. Bread bounced off of Wild’s forehead and he squealed with delight.

“Right,” said Legend. “Cause it really looks like he’s lost right now.”

Warriors couldn’t help but chuckle at that. “I’ll admit it is nice to see Wild so…”

“Happy.”

“Happy,” Warriors agreed. “I don’t think I have a single memory of Wild ever laughing as hard as he’s doing now. It’s heartbreaking to know he’ll grow into someone who doesn’t believe they deserve happiness. I want him to laugh more.”

“Now you sound like Twilight.”

“Ugh.”

“That’s a compliment!”

“UGH.”

The two shared a good-hearted laugh. They spent the next few minutes pouring over books when Sky wandered over, the Master Sword in hand.

“Are we ready to do this?” He asked.

At this point Wild had stopped eating and was playing with the leftover food. The kid was clean, full, and most importantly, calm. Unlike his counterparts, Warriors has never transformed into anything in his life. He’d no idea how it’s supposed to feel, how long it took, if it was painless or disorienting. 

Warriors sighed and nodded, getting up. “Yes, now is the best time. Give me the sword, I’ll do it.”

Though Sky always held onto the sword, he was never selfish with it. He gave it over freely.

For the first time in Warrior’s life, the sword felt heavy. Deep swirls of anxiety pooled in his stomach as he made his way over to the two giggling kids. It didn’t help on the side, Twilight was there, arms crossed in front of him, staring at Warriors with intensity.

He bent down in front of the kids, the sword on his lap. “I’m glad to see you two are having fun.”

Wild perked up at the sight of him. He pointed. “Hey, that’s my sword!” Before Warriors could speak, Wild got up and grabbed the Master Sword out of Warriors’ hands, hugging it to his chest. “This is mine! I pulled it!”

Warriors waited for something to happen. There was no flashing light. No sparkles. Not even an ominous lightning strike. Wild held the sword and the moment stretched. He didn’t transform back.

Legend rubbed his chin in thought. “So it’s not a curse. Interesting…”

“Not a curse?” Warriors said. “If the Master Sword can’t undo this, then what-!” He looked to everyone in the group, who were all staring wordlessly, no answer to give. It was horrifying to see eight heroes who all defeated great evils in their lives, have no idea what to do next. 

Wild, oblivious to the adults mounting worry, held the sword up high. 

Chapter Text

Legend immediately went back to his bag and started dragging more books out. “This entire time, this entire time I thought we were dealing with a curse. All my research was through books about curses, about flowers! I should have known it wouldn’t be so simple! If my theory is correct…”

Wild was busy swinging the Master Sword around to notice the drama happening behind him. Wind subtly guided him away from the group to avoid overhearing. “Hey, let’s go over here where there’s more room to practice swings.” He threw the others a pointed look to hurry this up.

Legend pulled out a thick purple book from his bag. He exclaimed, “Ah-HA!” and started pouring through the pages. It didn’t take him long to stop somewhere in the middle and jabbed his finger at the text. He held up the book to the others, showing off the page. There were no pictures. “I knew it, I knew it! We’re not dealing with a curse, we’re dealing with a wish master!”

He paused for dramatic affect. Nobody reacted.

Legend’s smile slumped and he dropped his arms. “A wish master? Have any of you dealt with-? Ah, look, wish masters are basically minor gods. They can be found all over the world in lot of places. Except they’re not like Nayru or a dragon, they’re right bastards . No matter how specific you state your wish, they will find a way to corrupt it.. You want a million rupees? They steal it from the local bank and now you’re on the run from the law. You never want to feel hungry again? Your stomach disappears. Yet despite every wish going wrong, people will come in droves thinking they can outsmart them.”

Warriors frowned. “So Wild wished for…” He looked back at the kid. “This?”

“Not specifically. He wished for something and got this as the result. If we knew what it was, we could probably figure out-.”

“He wished for his memories back,” Twilight said.

Everyone turned to Twilight. This was the first time he’s spoken in the past half hour, choosing to brood away from the others like an jilted teenager. He clarified, “That’s been his goal since we’ve all first met him. He wished for his memories to return, and this wish master turned him into an age where he did have them.”

Legend considered this. “Makes sense. It could also explain why the Master Sword won’t turn him back. Wild wanted this. Why would she deny him?”

“Oh my god,” Warriors groaned as he pinched the bridge of his nose. “So how do we turn him back? Do we need to kill this wish master?”

Legend opened his mouth, paused, and went back to his book. He made a face. “I don’t know. The blue flower we found is connected to them, so maybe I can find a reverse spell and…” He mumbled off, deep in his own thoughts.

Wild was swinging the Master Sword around like a feather duster, showing none of the years of experience he had as an adult. Wind was trying to show him the proper way to hold the sword. Wild laughed and it was like hearing birds singing in the morning. 

Warriors was suddenly struck with a thought.  “I know Wild didn’t want this technically, but… do we have the right to take it away from him again?”

Twilight snapped his eyes to him. “You can’t be serious.”

“His adventure is done,” said Warriors. “There’s no more Calamity, no more need to fight. The Master Sword didn’t want to take this away from him. Why should we?”

“You think this is the better scenario? Let him forget the other half of his life? What about his Zelda? His current friends? Letting him stay like this is not a solution!”

“I’m just thinking out loud. You can’t stand there and tell me if you had the ability, you wouldn't take away all of Wild’s pain regarding the Calamity.”

Twilight’s mouth tightened as if he was trying to keep himself from speaking. Free, untamed laughter erupting from Wild caught his attention, and Twilight’s face tightened even more. 

Warriors continued. “I’m not saying we give up in trying to change him back. That maybe… this isn’t as bad as we think it is.”

Judging from their faces, half of the heroes didn’t agree with him. The other half seemed to be considering it, their brows furrowed in thought. Time was particularly pensive, his hand over his mouth as he stared off into the woods. Nobody voiced their opinions though. 

“I’m going to check on Wild,” Warriors said. “See if he can tell me anything about this wish he made.”

Warriors only got a couple of steps when Time suddenly grabbed him by the arm, halting him. In a low whisper he said, “That is a very dangerous suggestion you just made.” His hold on Warriors didn’t lessen. “Because it is so very tempting to consider. Wild gets to live out his youth again. He won’t have to carry the burden of everyone who was killed by the Calamity. He’ll grow up normal. Happy. Safe.” Time glanced over to Twilight who was still staring off into nothing, his hands clenched and mouth thin. “Such a very tempting thought. But who will take care of Wild? Treat him as their own child? You? Twilight? All the while ignoring the bodies left behind.”

Warriors grunted and pulled his arm out from Time’s grip. “I only spoke the truth. If the Master Sword can't- won't change him back, then who are we to defy its decisions?"

"You put too much faith in that sword."

"Right now that sword is the only one who knows the real truth. It'll be foolish not to listen."

Chapter Text

Warriors watched as Wind pretended to be a bokoblin and Wild dramatically swinging the sword around. It was nice to see Wind playing with someone closer to his age. It couldn’t be fun hanging around with a bunch of boring adults who had conversations like taxes and back problems. “Hey kiddos,” Warriors said as he made his way over to them. “What’s the news.”

Wind said, “Well, I just ravaged an entire village, and Wild here was sent to kill me.”

Wild nodded. “Except this particular bokoblin has laser eyes, and I have to avoid them or else I explode.”

“Sounds dramatic,” said Warriors. “May I borrow the hero? I need to speak with them.”

“Sure,” said Wind. He reached out for the Master Sword, to which Wild clutched it to his chest, refusing to give up. 

“No,” said Wild. “Only I am allowed to wield it. To allow another would mean to bear the same burden.”

Wind’s eyes widen. They kept forgetting about Wild’s unusually impressive vocabulary. “I understand,” Wind said. He held his hands up away from the sword. “I’ll be over here if you guys need me.” 

Wind was barely out of earshot when Wild suddenly asked, “Is my dad coming soon?”

Warriors squatted down to Wild’s level. “He’s been delayed.”

“Oh.” Wild’s face tightened and it looked like he was about to cry. HIs face scrunched up and his eyes became wet. He fought through it and shook his head. “Then I shall continue waiting for him. He has an important job, and it is my job not to make him worry.”

“That is an important job,” Warriors said. “I wish more people realize that. I do have a question to ask… if you could make any wish in the world, what would it be?”

Wild smiled shyly. “World peace,” he said.

“That’s nice to hear. But what is your real wish?”

“I want to shrink down to the size of a mouse and live inside a cake,” Wild said. He giggled.

“You like cake, huh?”

Wild nodded furiously. “My mother makes wonderful cake. She is the official patissier for the royal family.”

So that’s whom Wild learned to cook from. Wild once admitted he didn’t know who taught him. He was thought it’ll be a mystery for all time. “That is a great wish. Do you have any others?”

“My own horse,” Wild said. “Father says I’m too young and won’t let me ride one until I get taller.”

“That is true. You need strength to handle an animal. Perhaps when you’ve gained a little more weight, you’ll be able to ride. Any other wishes?”

This time Wild frowned. “Are you fishing for something?”

The kid was too smart of his own good. Warriors tried not to hunch like he’d been caught snooping in the cookie jar. “You caught me,” Warriors said. “I’m investigating someone called a Wish Master, and I was wondering if he granted any of your wishes. I guess he didn’t since you’re not currently eating a giant cake.”

Wild gave a little chuckle. “What did this Wish Master do?”

“He may have granted a wish to one of my friends, who turned him… different than who he was. I’m trying to see if I can turn him back.”

“But if that’s what your friend wanted, why turn him back?”

“That’s the thing: we don’t know if that was his true wish or if the Wish Master corrupted it somehow.”

“Oh. It’s a shame you don’t have the Sheikah Slate.”

Warrior’s eyebrows rose at this new information. He did his best not to look over to Twilight.  “The Sheikah Slate?”

“Yeah! The Hyrulian royal family has it! It’s considered a great and powerful piece of technology. It’s rumored the slate can summon anything . I’m sure if you had it, I bet you can summon this Wish Master.”

Wild never told them of such a feature. He may not even remember it. “That’s good to know. Thanks for the info, kiddo. I’ll let you get to back to destroying laser-eyed bokoblins.”

“Oh! Um… before you go… do you have an ETA when my dad will get back?”

Warriors smiled sadly. “Unfortunately I do not.”

Hearing that took another notch out of Wild. He didn’t tear up this time, and just nodded, hugging the sword closer to his chest.

***

Warriors spent the next hour trying to think of a way to talk to Twilight about borrowing the Sheikah Slate. He was fully aware he could walk up to Twilight, tell him of the situation, and they could go from there. But Twilight had been such a little agonizing asshole , the thought of going up to him for anything right now seemed like a herculean task.

Wild has never allowed anyone else but Twilight touch the slate. Even when others just wanted to hold it, he’d refused. If anybody would know how to use the damn thing, it was Twilight. 

Warriors didn’t walk over immediately. He’d stalled, hoping Legend would suddenly get another eureka and figure out their solution to the problem.

In the meantime, the others in their little group were coming to Warriors with their own opinions.

Sky said, “You know, there’s a chance Wild and his Zelda are romantically involved.”

Warriors made a face. “He’s never mentioned anything like that before.”

“He doesn’t need to. I can tell.”

“Uh-huh.”

“If Wild stays a child, any progress he’s made with Zelda, with any romantic partner, is gone. His past was traumatic, but to stall his future, is cruel. Especially with those who love him for who he is now, memory loss and all.”

Warriors wanted to groan. As if he didn’t consider that already. It was a risk, no different than on the battlefield where sending a group of men to attack one section meant their guarantee death. That’s the problem with this argument: nobody was going to be fully happy by the outcome. Were Wild and his Zelda in love? There was no proof. And Warriors was not going to make decisions on maybes.

“I’ll keep that in mind,” said Warriors.

***

Hyrule then came to him. “You know, I don’t disagree with you.”

Warriors gave a full body sigh. Looked like everyone was going to give their opinions. “Yeah?”

“But I don’t fully agree with your decision either.”

”That helps.”

“I just think everything is happening way too fast. Wild has only been a kid for a couple of hours now. To suddenly make a decision that could affect his entire future is rash. We should give more plan to this.”

“I understand your concerns,” said Warriors. “The problem is we don’t know how much time we have, if any. For all we know the Wish Master fucked off and we will never see him again. If that happens, what’s our next step? Keep trying? Or make arrangements?”

Hyrule let out a slow breath, indicating to Warriors he should do the same. Warriors refused to take a calming breath. “We take things one day at a time. Don’t try to look ten days into the future, but now. What can we do now .”

“And what can we do now? ”

“Lunch.” Hyrule said “I… uh, messed up on breakfast. Do you want to take a crack at it?” 

“Ask Wild. I’m sure even at that age he can still out-cook us all. It’ll give him something to do right now.”

***

After Hyrule, Four walked over. Warriors sighed and said, “Might as well. Go ahead, tell me your thoughts.”

Four said, “I just have one question: If Wild stays a child, do you plan to adopt him?”

After Time’s ominous warning, Warriors started giving the thought more consideration. Certainly Twilight would step up and offer, but would Warriors? Warriors could certainly offer a decent life for the kid. He had a nice home in a good area of Castle Town, he had the respect of the royal family, and he could afford to send Wild to a good school, feed him, clothe him; he would want for nothing. 

But would Warriors love him like a son? Be willing to put in the effort? For most of Warriors’ life, he thought if he did become a father, it would be an accident. Sleep with some random girl and then months later she comes back with a full belly. Warriors was no brute, he wouldn’t leave this girl on her own. He would provide, even marry if that’s what it took. 

He’ll do what needs to be done.

“I would,” Warriors finally said. 

Four nodded. “Good. Then you have my support in whatever decision you make.”

***

Warriors decided to ask for the slate after lunch. Having full stomach would improve everyone’s attitudes, and Twilight might be in a more giving mood. When Hyrule asked, Wild delivered on lunch. Even at his young age, Wild out-cooked them all. He made fried rice with nice big chunks of savory meats, a delicious broth to pair with it, and he cut up fruit to make juice. 

When Twilight saw the meal, he wasn’t happy. “Kids this young shouldn’t be making all this food for us.”

“I didn’t see you offering,” Legend said, taking a break from researching. He ladled himself a nice big bowl of rice. “Stop complaining and eat. You’ve been angry all morning. It’s going to give you wrinkles.”

Despite his protests, Twilight also gave himself a big portion of rice. Everyone ate, praising young Wild and his abilities. The boy beamed with pride, shoving rice into his mouth at such speeds, he choked and Wind had to slap his back. 

By the time they were finished eating, Wild started getting sleepy. He was still chewing his rice, but slowly, like he couldn’t find the energy to bite down. When he finally swallowed, his eyelids could barely keep open.

Warriors took the bowl out of Wild’s hands and placed it aside. He also took the Master Sword without any resistance. “C’mon, kiddo. Time for a nap.”

“Nuh,” Wild said. He sat up straighter, forced his eyes open. They immediately drooped back down. “I wanna wait for… my father…”

“Sure thing. But you should lie down anyway.”

Warriors scooped Wild into his arms. The boy relaxed and his head rested upon Warrior’s shoulder. The scene got several aww! responses from the group. A light blush tinged on Warriors cheeks, and he smiled, patting Wild on the back. “Let’s get you to bed.”

Chapter Text

“I need to see the Sheikah Slate.”

Warriors decided to get it over with and just outright ask Twilight for the slate. Now that Wild was down for a nap, this was the perfect time to do it. He waited till Twilight was also finished with lunch, hoping a full belly would finally that stick out of his ass. As the others began to disperse from lunch, wandering off to their own thing, Warriors waited for the moment Twilight was alone and approached him.

The slate hanged off of Twilight’s belt.

Twilight barely looked at him. “No.”

Warriors lips thinned. He tried again. “I have need of it. Wild said-”

“Wild entrusted the Slate to me. If you need of it, tell me what it is.”

Frustration bubbled in Warrior’s guts. He refused to let it boil over, keeping the goal in mind. “Wild said the Slate can summon anything. I think we should use it to summon the Wish Master.”

“It can’t.”

“We can try-”

“No, you can’t.” Twilight stood up to finally faced him. “The Slate is old, and much of it has been broken and lost to time. It doesn’t have the ability, if it ever had it in the first place.”

Warriors waved a hand over to where Wild was sleeping. “This isn’t second-hand information, this is straight from the horse’s mouth. You should at least consider it.”

“I don’t need to consider it, I already know. The function Wild may be referring to helps him locate plants and animals. But it has to already be in the database. It does not ‘summon’ anything. What you’re asking for does not exist.”

“Day-tah-base...? Look, can you just check-? ” Warriors reached out towards the slate.

Twilight immediately jumped out of his reach, grabbing the slate protectively. His eyes flashed with anger. “Wild entrusted the slate to me , not you. You keep your hands off.”

Warriors pulled back. He was not going to get into a physical fight over this but it was getting harder to be patient with Twilight. Every interaction with him was now a fight, an accusation, a dirty look. Warriors was getting sick of it.

“Fine,” Warriors said, backing off. “But this attitude of yours? Needs to fucking end . I’m tired of walking on egg shells with you. We’re all on the same team here.”

He didn’t wait for Twilight to respond. Warriors turned and walked off. 

***

Wild needed new clothes.

Four and Wind were kind enough to keep offering their own, but Warriors wanted something that could actually fit the kid, not hang off of him like a hand-me-down dress. Besides, Wild also needed shoes, socks, underwear, a toothbrush, and many other items that could not be borrowed. After four days without them, he definitely needed them. The decision was made to go into town and do a little shopping.

“Yes!” Wind whooped. “I’ve been itching to get out of this area and see something new!”

“It is a good idea,” Legend said. “I can hit up the university and see the books they have.” He grimaced over the crick in his neck from reading so much. “Maybe even get a massage.”

In the past few days Twilight’s resentful anger had calmed down, but it was clear he was still upset by Wild’s rejections. Twice more he tried to approach the boy, and both times Wild simply hid his face away, refusing to look at him. Warriors didn’t know why Twilight was so scary to him. Maybe the facial tattoo really was just that intimidating. When it was announced the group was going into town, Twilight said, “I’ll stay at the camp. Keep an eye out.”

Warriors rolled his eyes at this. The man was really going to throw himself a pity party, wasn’t he? 

“We’ll bring you back something nice,” Sky offered him.

***

Warriors knew most of his companions preferred the simple life of farms and forests and dirt. But he was a cityboy. He loved the constant noise of a hundred different voices talking at once, the sounds of horses clomping through paved roads, the hustle and bustle of city life. He took comfort in knowing he could go to any food stall, toss some rupees and get a big, fat turkey leg in return. Wild’s cooking was a delight, but it was nice being able to choose what foods you ate and when. (“Today’s meal is yesterday’s leftovers!” Wild declared at dinner time.)

Little Wild certainly shared in his excitement. The boy was dancing on his feet, staring at all the different vendors in wonder. 

“Do you live in Castle Town?” Warriors asked him.

Wild nodded. “I do! I used to live outside the city limits, but when I pulled the sword, the king insisted father, mother and I move closer to the castle. I miss my old house though. There’s so much to see in Castle Town but I loved playing in the woods around my old house.”

Warriors made a mental note of that. When Wild became normal again, he could tell the lad more his history. If Wild stayed like this… well, Warriors at least he knew to buy a house with a big yard. 

First stop was to get clothes. The tailor was a plump older woman who greeted them with a big toothy grin. A pin cushion was strapped to her wrist as a measuring tape draped over her neck. “Hello, hello, darlings! How may I be of service? Looking for something new for a party, mmm?”

“Actually,” Warriors placed his hand on Wild’s shoulders. “We need clothing for the little one here. We were traveling and he lost everything in an accident.”

The woman gasped. “Oh, you poor thing!”

“Yes, very tragic! So we need trousers, shirts, uhhh socks, sleepwear… whatever he needs. Money is no object.” Money certainly was an object, but surely it shouldn’t cost too much for children's clothes.

“Yes, of course!  Come, come, let Miss Mia measure you and we can get started from there.”

Warriors had to give Wild a little push forward. He didn’t expect the kid to be so shy, considering he was throwing acorns into faces a few days ago. Wild kept his eyes down to the floor, blush burning onto his fat cheeks as Miss Mia stretched her measuring tape over his arms and torso. 

Miss Mia pulled back. “Mmh-hhm! Alright, I think we have plenty of options for your son here.”

Before Warriors could make an excuse, Wild piped up with, “He’s not my dad!”

“Oh? Your uncle then?”

“No. He’s some guy.”

Miss Mia straightened, her eyes locking in on Warriors. Her face was neutral but Warriors could tell what she was thinking. Quickly, Warriors said, “I’m looking after him while his dad is on a military retreat.”

Relief poured over Miss Mia and she visibly relaxed, the stiffness leaving her shoulders. “I see! That makes… well, let’s get you some clothes, shall we?” She scurried into the back to grab the intended items.

Once they were alone, Warriors said, “Please don’t make me sound like a predator.”

“That was not my intention and I apologize,” said Wild. “But… I don’t remember how I came into your care. It bothers me.”

Warriors sighed and he bent down on one knee. “I understand that it might be scary, and it’s okay to question. But try not to worry about it too much. Today is supposed to be fun day! Is there something you want to do after this?”

Wild’s face lit up. “Can we get ice cream?”

“Of course.”

Chapter Text

The clothes ended up costing more than Warriors predicted. He didn’t say anything though, keeping the tight smile on his face as he emptied out more than two-thirds of his wallet. It was worth it to see Wild in fresh new clothes. The perfectly fitted shirt and trousers made him look dignified. He doesn’t look homeless anymore! Warriors thought.  “Now that we got you dressed, how about getting something to eat?”

Wild looked panicked. “I didn’t bring any of the cooking ware!”

“No, we can go to a restaurant, order something. You don’t have to cook.”

“We can?” His face lit up with the possibilities. “Can I have… fried food?”

Warriors laughed. “You can have anything.”

***

He was broke now.

He knew of Wild’s grand appetite. He once watched the young man chomp down on a rock as if it were an apple. It was both an amazing sight to behold and the most grotesque thing Warrior’s ever seen. Wild’s stomach was an endless void where not even light could escape. Warriors should’ve known that even as a child, Wild ate like he’d been starving for a month.

There was a satisfaction in watching Wild sigh in contentment, leaning back and patting his full belly. “That was wonderful.”

Warriors kept his smile on. If he were on a date with a girl, this would be the moment to offer desert or coffee. Instead he was fully aware of his empty wallet and didn’t want to encourage Wild anymore than he already have. “Well, I think it’s time we go back and met up with the group.”

“It’s still very early,” Wild said. “Can we go explore the city?”

If they go exploring, it could lead to more spending. Suddenly Warriors thought of his own parents who refused to go out on warm spring days, giving the reason they didn’t want to spend money. As a child Warriors didn’t understand. HIs parents were decently well-off, so what was the big deal over a few coins? Sorry for being such a brat, Warriors mentally prayed to his parents.

Still, as Wild stared up at with those giant blue eyes, he couldn’t deny the boy this. “Alright.”

The hustle and bustle of city life was at its peak as the streets were filled with people. Fish porters yelled over the crowds, shaking their wares in the faces of anyone who passed. When Wild reached up to touch one, Warriors had to pull him back. “Oh no, if you touch it, they will force you to buy it. These merchants can be a bit crazy.”

“I’m not crazy!” The fish porter yelled at him, and then threw an anchovy at his head. 

Fruit sellers offered freshly squeezed juice, allowing people to sample. Wild tried a hydromelon, and when he looked to Warriors with big eyes, wanting to buy one, Warriors had to politely decline. The merchant couldn’t resist Wild’s charm, and did offer him a mandarin orange to snack on as they walked away. 

The crowds were getting bigger. Warriors was not claustrophobic, but this was getting ridiculous. His toes were getting stepped on, his elbows smacked into, and one hand grabbed at his rupee bag. Once they realized it was empty, the hand went away. Warriors mentally crackled.

His thoughts were interrupted when he heard a small cry, and looked down, seeing Wild struggling through the crowd. “Excuse me, citizen!” Wild was saying as another adult foot tripped him up. “Pardon me, my good man!”

Taking pity on him, Warriors bent down, scooped Wild up and placed the boy on his shoulders.

Wild startled. “Ah! Captain, I’m heavier than I look!”

“Nonsense, you’re light as a feather!”

Another lie, the boy had some heft to him. It must’ve been the thirty fried pieces of shrimp he swallowed for lunch. Warriors sucked it up, readjusted Wild’s legs, and kept on moving.

Warriors got used to the weight. Barely noticed it a few minutes in. He was weaving through the crowd as Wild giggled above him. A small hand kept touching the side of his face before finally resting on top of his head. Wild was gasping and pointing at all the new sights, feet kicking every time he saw something he liked. A puppet show. Dancing dogs. A woman with an overly large hat with purple feathers to match. They passed more food vendors, a watch makers shop, the post office, the local pub, and many other interesting shops.

When they got through the worst of the crowd, finally giving them space and elbow room, that’s when he spotted Legend. The man was sitting on a bench, eating a meat stick. He gave them a wave.

Legend looked like a new person with his glossy hair and face clean of whiskers. The dark circles under his eyes were gone. “You look better,” Warriors said.

“This is what it looks like after getting a full body massage, a hot bath, and a good nap.”

“I hope you didn’t fall asleep in the hot bath,” Wild said. “People have been known to drown.”

“I’ll keep that in mind next time. But Captain, I do have some information on our… friend.”

“Ah.” Warriors looked around, spotted another bench a few feet away. He walked over and lifted Wild off his shoulders, putting him down on the bench. “Hey, I need to have a private conversation with my friend here. Can you sit here for a moment?”

“Yes, Captain.”

“Good boy.” He went back to Legend. “What did you find?”

Legend pulled another bit of meat from the stick, chewed, then pulled out a folded piece of paper from his pocket. He smugly said, “I found the spell that will summon the Wish Master.”

Several emotions shot through Warriors at once. First relief for Wild. Maybe now they can finally turn the lad back to himself. But mostly disappointment. He’d been making plans, taking steps, thinking about the future. To have all of that taken away so suddenly left a hole in him. “I see…”

“We can do the spell later today. Force the bastard to turn Wild back.”

“You said the Wish Master corrupts the wishes. Does he also corrupt when the wish is reversed? I don’t want Wild to turn into an old man or a fetus.”

“That is a risk we’ll have to take.”

“I don’t like it, I need a guarantee.”

“Hey, how about YOU study for hours on end, collect the necessary ingredients and– where’s the Champion?”

Warriors turned around. The bench was empty. He cursed and got to his feet, scanning the surrounding area. There were other people, other kids, but Wild was nowhere in sight. “Why didn’t you see him leave?”

“You’re the one who was looking after him!”

“You were the one facing him!”

“With your big head in the way?”

A horrible thought entered Warrior’s mind. “Shit, what if someone took him?”

“No!” Legend said, aghast. “Twilight would literally kill us!”

“I’m going to look over here, you look over there!”

Legend tossed aside the rest of his meat stick and took off running.

Warriors turned back towards the previous crowd. He tried to think positive: maybe Wild wanted to check out that puppet show or the dancing dogs. That made sense, that’s something a kid would wander off for. Except terrible images of an unknown man grabbing Wild filled Warrior’s brain. Wild struggling as he’s carried away, his eyes wide and begging for help, only to be ignored.

Warriors ran faster.

He pushed through the crowds, barely excusing himself as he stepped on toes. His head kept whipping around whenever he caught sight of blonde hair, then cursing when it wasn’t the kid. The puppet show was over, the audience dispersed. The dog dancing dogs were taking a break. The few children still hanging around said they don’t remember any kid with Wild’s description.

Maybe Legend found him. If not… Warriors had no idea what he would do. Right now he was not an experienced captain who could make lightning-fast decisions on the battlefield; right now he was a scared, anxious man, desperate to find the kid. Was this how Twilight felt all the time? Always worrying? Gods, it was awful. 

Warriors was half-way back to the bench when he passed the postal office, and spotted Wild idly walking out of the front doors.

“Kid!” Warriors rushed forward, going to his knees and grabbing Wild by the shoulders, checking him over. “Are you okay? Are you hurt?”

“I’m okay,” said Wild. “No need for panic.”

“No need? I told you stay on the bench! Why did you leave?”

“I saw the post office as we walked past. I decided to send my dad a letter, so he knows not to worry as I wait for him.”

“I-” Warriors groaned as pain hit his chest. The relief he felt was suddenly replaced with the secret knowledge that Wild sent a dead man with no address a letter. A whiplash like that could kill an elephant. He took a breath and said, “Don’t wander off like that again.”

“I apologize, Captain. I just wanted to let my dad know of my current situation.”

Warriors looked to the post office, his mouth twisting. Did he dare go inside and try to get the letter back? Or leave it alone, knowing it was forever going to be unsent? With Wild staring up with big hopeful eyes, Warriors knew he couldn’t undo what’s been done. 

“Let’s get back to our friends,” he said, resigned. “I know they’re worried about us.”

Chapter Text

When they finally got back to Legend, the results of the spa day he’d given himself had been ruined. Like a rabbit caught in a snare, his eyes were dilated, hair mussed, and he was breathing hard enough to hyperventilate. Once he spotted Warriors with Wild, he looked like he wanted to murder everyone. Instead he twisted around and declared, “I’m going to take another bath!” And walked off, steam spouting from his red ears.

***

Legend held out the small blue flower that once sat underneath Wild’s pillow. By now the flower had decomposed, turning into a dark brown, crumpled and fragile. “Good thing I saved this,” he said. “I could still summon the Wish Master without it, but that would have made things so much more difficult. I’ve got the other ingredients ready to go too. I’m ready whenever you are.”

The adults stood around Legend, staring down at the dead flower. Warriors looked over his shoulder, to where Wild was busy showing off his new clothes to Wind. He sighed and said, “I’m ready.”

“Tell me what to do,” said Sky.

“I’ll help,” said Hyrule.

“I miss the kid already,” said Four.

“We got a plan,” said Time.

“Time to get our Champion back,” said Twilight. 

Warriors chose not to tell the others about the letter Wild sent. If they truly managed to get the spell reversed, then the letter was a moot point. It was just more drama. “I’m going to see to the kid, then we can start the spell,” he said, stepping away from the group.

In another life Warriors would be raging at the fact he spent so much money on children’s clothes only for them to be useless the next day. He didn’t care about that. It was money well spent. As he came towards Wild, his steps felt slow, like he was walking in a dream. He kneeled down before the boy, who blinked up at him with an innocence his older self didn’t have.

“Hey kid,” Warriors started. “I got word your father is coming. I’m going to go to meet him halfway. And once I do that, I’ll bring him to you.”

Wild’s face lit up with excitement and he started bouncing on his feet, hands clapping together. He startled, and composed himself, dampening down on his enthusiasm. He nodded. “Thank you for that information. I shall will await your arrival.”

“Yeah.” Warriors said. His chest tightened. “Um… this may be the last time we get to talk to each other. So I just want to let you know… you’ve been a great kid. I know you’ll make your father proud.”

Wild smiled like the sun. He straightened his back, and saluted. “Thank you, Captain.”

Warriors saluted him back. “At ease, soldier.”

***

Warriors, Time, Twilight, Four and Sky all stood around in a large circle, their weapons and shield at the ready. Legend was in the middle, placing down the dead blue flower in the middle. He sprinkled pink dust over it, then stepped back, hovering one hand over it. In his other hand, he held a magic tome he’d stolen from the university. “I plan to give it back!” He had said when the others gave him disapproving looks.

“Alright, I’m summoning the bastard now.” He began to read from the tome.

Warriors knew some magic, though majority of his spells were just to enhance his defense or offensive skills. He didn’t know anything more fanciful than that. Legend spoke in a strange language Warrior’s had never heard before, his fingers twisting in strange movements like he was conducting a choir. As he spoke, glowing golden tendrils floated out his fingertips, connecting down to the flower. Legend tightened his fist, and the flower bloomed. No longer was it shriveled little thing. Several blue and pink flowers popped up into a gorgeous display.

Right in the middle of the bloom, a creature no bigger than Warrior’s thumb, stood the Wish Master.

“Huh,” Hyrule said, lowering his guard. “I was expecting someone a bit more intimidating.”

“Hello, good friends!” Said the Wish Master, bowing. He was dressed like a merchant, donning a golden vest, a striped shirt, and dark blue trousers. An impressive curled mustache covered most of his face, and a tiny bowling hat sat on brown curly hair. “How may I be of service? Do any of you perhaps looking to make a wish?”

Legend pointed down at him. “You listen here, you little pipsqueak! You turned one of our friends into a child, and you need to turn him back!”

The Wish Master trembled under his harsh tone. “Oh my! So forceful! I didn’t think my new clients will be so scary!” He pulled out a notebook from his front pocket, casually flipped through it. “A child? Hmmm… What is his name…?”

“Link,” Legend said.

The Wish Master kept flipping through. “Hmm… nope, don’t see his name here.”

“Oi! Don’t you be pulling tricks on us! You literally turned him into a child less than a few days ago.”

“And I’ve granted dozens of wishes since then. Goodness graces, you, my good sir, are the twenty-seventh person to summon me just today! Though the others were not so mean as you have been…”

“His name is Link,” Twilight said. “He has blonde hair, blue eyes, wears the color of the royal family-”

The Wish Master waved his notebook at Twilight. “Sir, half the people standing in this circle bear that resemblance. For all I know, you’re talking about him!” He pointed at Warriors. “Besides, there are no Links in my book. He must’ve given a fake name.”

“A fake name?” Warriors repeated. 

Legend rubbed his forehead. “Argh! It doesn’t matter if he called himself Ganondorf! You clearly turned him into a child! So revert him back to his original age!”

“Is that your wish?” The Wish Master said, wiggling his bushy eyebrows.

“No, that’s a threat,” Time said, his hold on his sword tightening. “You either turn him back, or we turn your back.”

“Oh, oh, oh, no need to be so crude, my good man! I can turn him back, and no after affects either… but I do need a special ingredient to pull off such a magnificent feat.”

Warriors groaned. Of course there was a price. “What is it?”

“A wishing star.”

“Okay. Where do we get that?”

The Wish Master pointed up into the endless blue sky.

Everyone groaned. “You got to be fucking kidding me- you mean an actual star?”

“They’re the most purist of wishes. You get me a star, and I can turn… er, what was his name again? I can turn Dirk back. Yes, yes!”

From the side, Warriors noticed Twilight getting a strange look on his face. Twilight pulled up the Shekiah Slate and searched through it, his eyes narrowing. 

The Wish Master’s body started to shine bright. “Oop! Looks like I’m being summoned again. Bring me that wishing star, and I’ll be able to turn your little friend back, guarantee. Tooda-loo!” He then burst into a million golden sparkles, disappearing from view.

Chapter Text

Time rubbed the back of his neck. “So. A wishing star. I suppose nobody here has one in their back pocket?”

“I know what he’s talking about,” said Four. “I’ve gotten my hands on a few of them over the years. I don’t have any right now,” he said, holding up a hand when everyone looked hopeful. “They’re super rare and hard to predict when they fall from the sky.”

“What are they used for?” Hyrule asked.

“Potions, mostly. They make for amazing ingredients. They’re also really pretty, so rich folk like to hoard them to display them in their mansions.”

That clicked something in Warrior’s memory. To gain more money for the war budget, Warriors usually had to play niceties with nobles, going to their overly fancy parties and kissing their ass. He would eat off of golden plates, sipping out of crystal champagne glasses while his men were struggling with cheap medical supplies. During certain dinners, the tables would be decorated with exotics fruits, fancy ice sculptures, or whatever random shit nobles deemed beyond a peasant’s reach. However there was one decoration that Warriors could not keep his eyes off from.

It was beautiful. There was no better word than that. It had a geometric shape, intricate and unusual. It pulsed with an ethereal golden glow. When Warriors asked what it was, the nobles laughed their rich laugh, low-key mocked him for his ignorance, then told him it was a fallen star. 

A fallen star? He didn’t believe it. He thought the nobles were still mocking him, so he didn’t ask any further questions. (He would later steal some silverware to sell for new socks for his men)

Warriors groaned, realizing how close he was to one. If he had known he would have stolen it too. 

To the side, he noticed Twilight staring intensely at the Sheikah Slate. 

“You got something, Rancher?” Warriors asked out loud, catching everyone’s attention to look at him.

Twilight immediately straightened, looking like a child caught with their hand in a cookie jar. In that brief second, Twilight angled the Slate just enough for Warriors to catch a glimpse what was on the screen.

It was a star. Beautiful and golden, just as amazing as the one Warriors saw so many years ago. 

Twilight turned off the Slate and clipped it back to their belt. “I thought I found something,” he said. “But it’s nothing.”

Like the nobles before, Warriors did not believe him. It was sad, really, the way Twilight continued to brood like a spoiled child. That was definitely a wishing star he was looking at, and yet he lied to all their faces. Why? What did he have to gain from lying? The ugly truth was obvious: he wanted to be the hero of this story, suddenly reveal he had a star, and he would be Wild’s favorite person again. Maybe he wanted to keep the boy as a boy, sabotaging any attempt to remedy that.

Deep down Warriors knew Twilight was not so egotistical he would actively ruin Wild’s chances, but Warrior’s patience had long run out.

His gaze narrowed, focusing on the Slate.

Chapter Text

At the moment, Wind and Wild were knee-deep in the river, splashing each other, giggling and playing like normal kids. Wild had folded his new clothes and gently placed them aside on a warm, flat rock. Strange how such a sophisticated, clean child grew up to be a mountain man, eating rocks and roots to survive. 

Warriors turned away from the sweet sight, walking back to camp. He had a job to do.

At the moment two people sat around the camp fire. Twilight, who was busy cleaning his tools, and Legend, who just finished making soup, and had poured himself a bowl. It wasn’t enough soup to feed nine people, let alone Wild whose appetite still rivaled an adult’s. Warriors would have chastised Legend for this oversight, but he had to focus.

Warriors walked into the area, getting himself a bowl of soup from the bubbling cauldron. He then took a seat right next to Legend, who scowled at him. “Uh, there’s plenty of other seats.”

“Do you want to make fifty rupees?” Warriors whispered, acting as nonchalant as he could be.

“Suspicious,” Legend said. “But I’m listening.”

“Spill a bowl of soup on the Rancher.”

Legend’s gaze quickly darted to the oblivious Twilight, then back. “This soup is hot. I could burn him.”

“He’ll be fine,” Warriors said, then to make it a bit sweeter, “A hundred rupees.”

“Now you’re being super suspicious, what are you-”

“Three hundred rupees.”

Legend considered this.. “Throw in another fifty and I won’t tell Twi it was your idea.”

“Done.”

“I better not get punched for this,” he grumbled, putting aside his own bowl. He went to the cauldron and poured out a fresh serving, walking it over to Twilight. Hot steam curled off the surface, and the sight of it sent a twinge of guilt into Warrior’s guts. It wasn’t enough to change his mind. “Hey, you hungry?”

Before Twilight could answer, Legend tripped on an imaginary rock, flinging the bowl forward. It struck Twilight right in the middle of his chest, splattering outward like a bug under a boot. It was quite an impressive spill, staining Twilight’s entire front, his neck, parts of his face, and most importantly, his trousers.

Twilight yelped, got to his feet and grabbed at his chest, desperate to take off his tunic. “Damn, that’s hot!”

“Sorry!” Legend said innocently.

Twilight’s hands went to his belt, and thinking better of his privacy, left the area to go to his tent. He was cursing as he left.

Warriors placed aside his bowl and got up to follow. He passed Legend, who was holding out his hand for the rupees. “Later,” Warriors said, briefly enjoying the look of betrayal on Legend’s face. >:o

With his steps as soft as whispers, Warriors followed Twilight back to his tent. He kept his distance, unsure how strong Twilight’s sense of smell was. He ducked behind a tree, and peeked out as Twilight stripped down to his skivvies, tossing aside his soiled tunic and trousers. 

Twilight placed the Sheikah Slate upon a tree stump.

“Gah…” He groaned, grabbing his water husk and dumping cool water down his front.

This was the perfect moment. Twilight was distracted, the Slate was right there for the taking. All Warriors had to do was reach out and grab it.

He hesitated.

He’s stolen items from the other heroes before, but that was all in fun and games. He’s never actually taken anything of value, sentimental or monetary. He wanted to tease his comrades, not piss them off. Taking the Slate was different. The moment his hand touched that Slate, he crossed a line he could never go back from. 

Sudden laughter caught both of their attentions. Wild and Wind were doing something that sounded like exceptional fun, their young giggles echoing across the forest like bird songs. Warrior’s body made the decision for him, and snatched up the Slate the moment Twilight’s back was turned.

With his treasure in hand, Warriors quietly made his exit.

***

He knew he didn’t have much time. The moment Twilight realized the Slate was gone, he was going to come running, sniffing it out with his wolf abilities. At best Warriors had fifteen minutes, and that was him being generous.

He got back to his tent, his heart pounding in excitement. It was the same feeling he got when he was a child, sneaking out at night to eat cookies in the garden. The exhilaration of it all, and the dread if he ever got caught. He stared at the Slate in his hands. Wild’s most precious, and most powerful item. He ran his fingers over Sheikah eye on the back. He wished Impa was here. 

He turned over. And over again. How do you work this thing?

“Uh… show me a fallen star?”

Nothing.

“Show me a Fallen star… please?”

Nothing.

He slapped the Slate against his hand. Nothing. He poked at the glass covering, and then jumped when it activated. “Oh!”

It still took a few more poking and prodding to figure out how to move the images. Once he did, he felt like the smartest man in the world. This was fun! No wonder Wild was always on this thing. The flashing lights, the big, bold colors tickled a part of his brain he never knew it existed. 

He accidentally pressed down too hard on an image of a turnip.

As if from thin air, a turnip suddenly appeared in front of the Slate. It held there for half a second, then dropped to the forest floor. Warriors laughed nervously. He tapped the image again, and another turnip popped up from nowhere. He kept pressing it, watching as turnips plopped down into a growing pile in front of him. He did note the number next to the image counting down. It wasn’t until he hit ZERO that the turnips stop showing up.

“I see…” he said. “So it’s not limitless.”

Alright, he was getting it now. Gah, what an idiot, he wasted precious time playing with turnips when he should be looking for that fallen star. Determination renewed, he started swiping. 

There was so much food. Ingredients after ingredients, whole finished dishes. He got into the weapons area, and it ached not to be able to admire what Wild had. Incredible pieces of bows, dozens of different arrows, cheap sword after cheap sword. Warriors swiped into the gem area, and he groaned, seeing the diamonds and rubies and sapphires. He kept swiping.

Plants. Insects. Fish. Bunch of weird glowing blue items. Monster body parts. There was an entire section dedicated to just fungi. Argh, where was the star???

Something golden flashed in front of him, and he had to scroll back a few pages to get to it.

There it was. The star. The reason he stole the Slate in the first place. It had nothing to do with jealousy or wanting to get back at Twilight and rub it in his smug, stupid face, no way. Warriors sighed, the beauty of it just was wonderful as the first time he saw it years ago. His finger hovered over the photo-

He heard hurried footsteps coming up behind him, and Warriors panicked. Shit, he waited too long, the Rancher was here to confront him. He immediately stood up, hiding the Slate behind his back.

It wasn’t Twilight. It was Sky. “Captain, you need to come quick!”

“What’s wrong?”

“It’s Wild. He’s inconsolable.” 

Inconsolable? The kid was giggling up a storm only a few moments ago. Without thinking twice, Warriors hooked the Slate onto his belt. “Take me to him.”

It didn’t take long to hear the echoing cries of Wild. Warriors quickened his pace, coming upon the chaotic scene. Everyone was there, trying to calm the boy down, but nothing they were saying was getting through. Wild was red in the face, cheeks wet from tears. His clothes were a mess, his buttoned unevenly, his little bowtie hanging off his neck. 

The heroes weren’t the only one present. The mailman was there too, distressed and sweating like a pig. He was the focus of Wild’s ire. The little boy pointed an accusatory finger at him. “FRAUD! HUSTLER!”

“I’m sorry, but it’s the truth!” The mailman said.

“NO! I WILL NOT BELIEVE YOUR LIES!”

Warriors walked in between the mailman and Wild, holding up his hands in a placating matter. “Whoa, what’s going on?”

“Captain!” Wild gasped. “That man over there, he’s a deceiver, a falsifier, a fool! I gave my money to the post office with the guarantee that my letter would arrive to my father!”

Aw shit, Warriors mentally cursed. Between summoning the Wish Master and grabbing the Slate, he’d forgotten all about the letter. He’d hoped the letter would be delayed long enough for all of this to blow over. He had to give it to the post office: their work ethic was impressive. 

The postman said, “Actually, children’s mail is free, so he didn’t pay anything…”

“Shut up!” Warriors hissed to him. To Wild he said, “I’m sure there’s a logical explanation.”

“I wrote the address correctly!” Wild said. He had the envelope in his tiny hand, and he held it up. The boy had impeccable handwriting. “See? SEE? Everything is correct! But this pretender here said the address doesn’t exist! He said MY DAD does not live there!”

The mailman did not shut up. He peeked around Warriors to say, “I’m sorry, but I tried! When I got to the area, all there was was a foundation where a house used to be!”

“FALSE!”

“Okay, I think we all need to calm down,” Warriors said. “No more yelling, no more accusations, let’s all take a deep breath and-”

Wild’s eyes widened. He suddenly ran forward, and for a moment Warriors thought the child was coming in for a hug. Instead, Wild unclipped the Sheikah Slate from his belt and backed away. The letter to his father fell to the ground, forgotten.

“Where did you get this?” Wild asked quietly. “This belongs to Princess Zelda, how did you get this?”

From the corner of his eye, Warriors could see Twilight grabbing at the empty space on his belt. A droplet of sweat rolled down the Captain’s forehead. There was no good answer he could think of. He took a step forward, and Wild took a cautious step back. “Kid, listen-”

“What did you do to her?” Wild asked, and Warriors flinched. He looked around the group, his eyes so wide with heartbreaking betrayal. “Is that why I can’t remember anything prior to waking up? You all did something to the princess… and now you’re doing something to me.”

“No, wait, this is all a big misunderstanding-”

Wild shook his head.  “Liar.”

He tapped the Slate, and a blue glowing ball appeared in his hands. Warriors didn’t know what this was, but like the fallen star, it pulsed with a strange ethereal beauty.

Twilight knew. He pushed through the heroes, screaming, “Wild, NO-!”

Wild threw the glowing object high into the air, showing off his incredible arm strength. The blue ball flew up, a tail of light followed like a comet across the night sky. Twilight grabbed the mailman, throwing him to the ground. 

“EVERYONE, GET DOWN!” 

Wild pressed the Slate again, and the blue object exploded. There was no wave of hot fire, no smoke, but Warriors was thrown onto his back by a bone crushing force. The blast of air was like a wall, and everyone fell, covering their heads with their arms. A high pitch whine echoed through Warrior’s ears. He struggled to move, pain radiating through his chest.

“Wild…” he gasped, struggling to push himself up to his elbows. “Kid…!”

Wild was gone. The only thing he left behind was the precious letter to his dead father.