Chapter Text
Mabel ran off the bus as fast as her legs would let her. Dipper just followed slowly from behind, his only bag hanging down from his shoulder. Mabel ran into Pacifica's arms and they both fell to the floor. Dipper walked up towards the rest of them as they laughed.
Ford stopped when Dipper didn't laugh or smile at Mabel's antics like he usually would do. "Hey Dipper! How was your school year?" Ford asked, holding his hand up for Dipper to high six.
Dipper rolled his eyes with a snarl forming on his face and just walked past, heading towards the shack. Everyone stopped to watch Dipper walk up to the shack's entrance.
"What happened to Dipstick?" Stan asked, looking over to Mabel for an answer. Mabel got up off the ground, helping Pacifica up and then sighed sadly.
"He's been like this for months. Won't talk to anyone, won't laugh or smile anymore. He’s staying up all night doing homework for college. It started happening before we moved into separate apartments." Mabel said as she went to hug everyone else.
Stan and Ford looked over to the shack worryingly. "Ford and I will talk to him in a minute….”
Silents washed over them all.
“Anyway, who wants to spend the rest of the day at the lake!" Stan said while he clapped his hands loudly, trying to get everyone off the topic.
Everyone else cheered happily and ran down to the lake except for Stan and Ford. Stan picked up Mabel's bags with a grunt. The twins both looked at each other with worried eyes, then started to walk over to the shack.
~~~~~~
Dipper opened the door slowly, cringing to the door squeak loudly at the rusted hinges movements. He let his hand fall off the rusted door handle and silently thought about how they never had to get tetanus as children. He walked in while he thought about getting a new door handle, took a deep breath through his nose, and immediately regretted it when a harsh sneeze was forced out of his body.
He groaned softly as he watched the dust float through the air, this place needed some major cleaning that he just didn't have the energy for. He let his gaze run over the room and his vision landed onto the gigantic, triangle window. He shivered at the memories running through his head at the shape, becoming colder than he already was.
He subconsciously moved to pull his jacket tighter around himself as he trudged to his side of the room, his feet dragging behind him. He dropped his duffle bag down on the ground loudly, not really caring about unpacking, then let his body fall harshly into the now way too small mattress.
His body desperately craved for sleep but whenever he tried to let himself drift, he heard the same thing that started to hunt him a few months ago. If he wasn't so focused on his heavy schooling or his inability to focus on main topics, he would have started to notice the slight tugging feeling that had settled in his chest. It wasn't as strong before they came down to Oregon, but now it was persistent and honestly annoying.
He let out an annoyed huff as he willed his mussels to push him up onto the unsheeted mattress that was way too small for him now. Curse his body and the growth spurts for being the reason why he's a good few feet taller than a 13 year old. He sighed heavily as he moved to sit criss-crossed on the bed with his back against the wall. He let his burning eyes close for the tiniest bit….
Hahahahahahahaha! AH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Dipper's eyes flew open as a flash of yellow and orange disappeared from in front of his eyes. His breathing was heavy as he felt himself shake slightly. It felt so real, so real to him… the laughter… the voice that came from the laughter…. the sound of it being right next to his ears.
He focused on getting his breathing and body under control as he noticed just how drained he seemed to be afterwards. It was weird to him and he's seen the way his sister has noticed it too. Going from being happy, energetic, and a genuinely normal 18 year old in college into a depressed, stressed and snappy, horribly sleep deprived, tired with life 18 year old that's failing in college in such a short amount of time.
He honestly didn't know what happened nor did he have any energy to care. He honestly didn't think he could muster getting up in the morning anymore with everything suddenly becoming more dull, stressful, and left feeling incomplete.
He didn't see the point of eating when he had no appetite, nor the point of going to see people that he didn't want to be around as being around people was exhausting. He was too tired to work on finishing anything but didn't have the motivation to just stop. He couldn't think but at the same time couldn't stop thinking, even if it was all at the wrong things.
He was cold all the time now and he jumped at any touch at all as it felt like he was burning. Everyday felt more and more like a chore and all he could really think about normally now was how he just wanted to float away into nothingness, to have someone pull him out of this exhaustion and anger. He just wanted to sleep and not move anymore…
He was just so tired of the same thing everyday….
He wanted something new…
He jumped when he heard a knock on the door frame vibrate through the whole room. He looked up quickly only to breathe out a sigh when he saw it was his Grunkles. They stared at him with what looked to be pity, he frowned in response. He didn't want their pity.
“Can we come in?” Ford asked softly with a smile that should have comforted him, but it didn't work.
“Ya whatever…” Dipper said, hissing out the words like they personally offended him.
He watched as the two older men came in, Stan sitting on Mable’s old bed while Ford just stranded to the left, blocking the door. They sat there in silence for a few as Dipper bounced his leg up and down in anxiety.
“So…” Dipper started, looking at the two uncles but rather as the now much more interesting floorboards. There was a sigh from Grunkle Ford.
“Are you doing ok kid? You're not as lively as you once were a couple months ago on that phone chat?” Stan asked softly.
“Video chat Stanley.” Ford corrected.
“Ya ya whatever, same thing.” Stan grumbled out.
The light bickering between the two older twins would have made Dipper laugh in the past, or at least made him smile somewhat. But there was nothing. Dipper felt empty and tired.
“I'm ok, Grunkle Stan. Just tired from college, you know? It's really kicking my ass hehe.. he…” Dipper tried to make himself feel more lively but he just didn't have the energy.
“What do you mean kid? You're the smartest one there.” Ford tried to make him feel a little better after the harsh remark on himself.
Dipper scoffed dryly.
“Ya… smart…. Tell that to my grades…” He responded as he let his small smile, a rarity nowadays, slip off his face and turn into empty expression.
He could only imagine what he looked like right now to everyone around him. His hair was a mess and unwashed, his clothes were clean enough for an adult boy in college, the almost white pale skin mixed with his dark eyebags.
The red rimmed eyes portraying the lack of sleep and the many nights spent crying. He must have smelt horrible from not having the motivation to shower more than maybe twice a week. He was a wreck yet he didn't, no, couldn't bring himself to fix it. He probably looked like he could die any second from some unknown sickness right about now.
“Well we just wanted to see how you were doing and came to tell you that your guy's new mattresses and bed frames will be here by tonight, that way you guys won't be sleeping in a teenager's bed.” Stan said as he stood up, then walked out with his brother, but not leaving without a small smile to the younger.
Dipper sighed again before forcing his body down onto the small mattress, then he let his eyes fall shut. No, he wasn't going to fall asleep. He was just letting his eyes close for a few so they would stop burning was all. He didn't need sleep.