Chapter Text
“I’m sorry, you’re what?” Katsuki asks, pivoting on his heel to glare at Kirishima, who’s grinning at him excitedly while remaining completely impervious to Katsuki’s glower.
“We’re getting married!!” Kirishima says it so loudly that a couple and a family standing behind in line feel compelled to congratulate him, which sets off what seems like the whole store and even the baristas behind the counter.
Kirishima walks out with a free coffee and snack, looking very pleased with himself. “Wow, this is pretty sweet. And I’m not even engaged yet!”
Katsuki smacks him upside the back of the head. “You moron! Then why did you say you’re getting married?”
“Because I finally decided when, where, and bought a ring! I mean, Mina helped me with the ring, but we’re really doing this, man.”
In truth, this chain of events has long been anticipated.
Although the friend group had all come together around a reluctant Katsuki, who’d been dragged into friendship kicking and screaming, Mina and Kirishima acted as the glue. The two of them were high school sweethearts, who had endured all of the highs and lows of growing up through college and grad school. All the pieces had been falling into place for them lately: a shared apartment; stable jobs and growing careers; a steady, enduring love. It was disgustingly domestic.
Katsuki should have seen this coming, and yet somehow he still feels blindsided by Kirishima’s announcement. Weddings are a hassle, and now he’s going to be dragged into one. He’s scowling, which isn’t really appropriate, so he finally schools his expression into something more socially acceptable and neutral. “Good for you both,” he mutters. “About time.”
He means it too. The two of them are ridiculously suited for each other.
“Yeah,” Kirishima sighs dreamily, his mouth lifting in a goofy smile. “It’s going to be perfect.”
Katsuki rolls his eyes and throws his arm around Kirishima’s head, dragging him into a loose chokehold to mess up his perfectly gelled hair. “So, I’m your best man, right?”
“C’mon, of course!” Kirishima shouts, laughing as he pushes Katsuki away. “Although maybe I’m starting to rethink that decision.”
Katsuki smirks and chokes him out a little harder as Kirishima tries to wrestle him down.
The engagement party is an elaborate private affair, as most events tend to be when Mina’s at the helm. It’s hosted at a rooftop restaurant with a phenomenal view of the city on a clear night. The entire area is lit by overlapping strings of fairy lights, which cast a soft, romantic glow over the gathering. Music filters in through hidden speakers, just the right volume to add to the atmosphere without overwhelming the chatter among guests.
Katsuki makes it just in time for the start of dinner, a work meeting with a high profile client having run extremely late. Ever the perfect hostess, Mina rises to greet him as he arrives, sliding her hand into the crook of his arm to guide him to his seat at the long table full of their friends. Several people shout out greetings, which he returns with a reluctant wave.
He’s entirely missed the cocktail hour Mina had been so excited for, but he knows he’s forgiven as he presses a small but expensive gift box into her hand and says, “Congratulations on the long overdue engagement to Shitty Hair. Smart of you to trap him before he wises up.”
She throws her head back in a loud laugh. “You asshole,” she says fondly, pressing a kiss to his cheek that he allows grudgingly. “Go eat and socialize.”
Sliding into the seat next to Kaminari, Katsuki steals the other’s champagne glass and downs it in one go.
“Hey!” Kaminari protests, but Katsuki just scowls at him with a hissed, “Shut up.”
The chatter around him is nonstop about the wedding: where it’s going to be (Hawaii, apparently); what theme are they planning on (it’s a surprise); how many guests (an intimate total of 50); and on and on.
Katsuki groans internally and sinks down in his seat, quick to order something stronger than champagne when the waiter makes his next round.
He really hates weddings.
Somehow, even though he’s not the one getting married, Katsuki can’t seem to escape it. It doesn’t help that he frequently hangs out at Kirishima and Mina’s apartment, which has become a wedding planning hub.
Kicking off his shoes in the entranceway, Katsuki has to sidestep a box of linen samples and a stack of binders, each spine labeled with a different component for the wedding from venue to entertainment. He finds Kirishima and Kaminari in the kitchen pouring out beers, one of which is immediately handed to Katsuki.
“Be careful today, Mina’s on a rampage with the guest list,” Kaminari warns Katsuki under his breath. “She’s already chewed out Sero for not taking this seriously enough.”
Katsuki rolls his eyes. “Got it, beware bridezilla.”
Kirishima snickers but quickly stifles it as if he’s afraid of being heard by Mina.
The original plan was to have a movie marathon, but as the three of them move to the living room to sit on the couch, it quickly becomes apparent that this isn’t going to happen. Mina has taken over the far wall with a white board that has a crudely drawn layout of the tables in the reception hall. In one hand she holds a sheet of printed names, while she uses her free hand to shuffle around little magnets with faces on them. Sero is stretched out in the lovechair in the corner, face buried in his phone while he sips on his beer.
As she senses their approach, Mina whirls around and claps her hands together. “Okay, so thoughts on plus ones?”
Kirishima freezes. After a moment’s silence, he says, “What...about them?” He sounds unsure if this is the right thing to say.
Mina gestures for him to elaborate. “Should we allow them for everybody or only people we know are in a committed relationship?”
Kaminari hesitates before finally saying, “Your wedding is a year away, so that status could easily change.”
“Right, which is why I’m leaning toward no plus ones at all.”
“What about Shinsou?” Kaminari asks, pouting.
Mina groans. “Fine, you get a plus one, Denki.”
Sero starts to protest, “Okay, I know my relationship is fresh, but what if I want to–”
Katsuki instantly tunes out. He thinks all of this is severely overblown and unimportant, so as an argument breaks out between the group again, he simply takes his seat on the couch to watch the show as he drinks his beer peacefully.
Suddenly, Mina’s shouting, “You don’t hear Bakugou asking for a plus one just in case !”
At his name, he tunes back in, raising his eyebrows.
Sero waves her off. “He’s terminally single anyway, so he’s not the best example.”
“What the fuck?” Katsuki says, suddenly massively offended. “What the hell’s that supposed to mean?”
“It means you’ve never been in a long term relationship, buddy, so I doubt that’ll change by the wedding.” Kaminari laughs goodnaturedly and throws an arm around Katsuki’s shoulder. Katsuki promptly shoves him off with a warning growl.
“Fuck you both,” he says. “You don’t know shit.”
“I don’t know,” Mina says, frowning. “They’re kind of right. You don’t really need a plus one.”
“Fuck you too,” he snaps.
“Hey!” Kirishima interjects, the loyal fiance. “No need to get so heated over plus ones.”
“That’s rich coming from the guy who’s barely following this conversation.”
The whole group erupts in loudly exaggerated ‘whoas’ as Katsuki comes for the fourth throat in a row, hackles raised. He preferred when they were all at each other’s own throats over idiotic wedding shit, instead of focusing all of their meddling attention on him and his life.
“You guys don’t know anything,” he repeats. “You have no idea if I’m even in a relationship right now.”
There’s a long pause wherein they all stare at him balefully before Sero ventures to say, “Who’s the saint?”
The group laughs as Katsuki flips them each off with both hands.
“Then fucking give me a plus one and find out at the wedding.” Katsuki says this confidently, as if he wasn’t lying through his teeth to his entire friend group, but his pride is at stake here so he’s feeling a little more dangerously impulsive.
Mina crosses her arms and narrows her eyes at Katsuki, the very picture of suspicion, but he remains steady under her scrutiny. “You heard me,” he barks, jutting his chin out in defiance. “I need a plus one.”
It’s a tense standoff for a good 30 seconds before she finally blows out an exasperated breath, throws her hands up, and says, “Fine! Everyone gets a plus one!” Then she finishes with one threatening finger jabbed in Katsuki’s general direction. “If you flake, Bakugou Katsuki, so help me god, I will end you .”
“Bakugou, my man, you’ve got the suit fitting on your calendar, right?” Kirishima says as soon as he picks up the phone. “This Friday, 3pm, you can’t miss it.”
“Wha–uhh, yes, yeah,” Katsuki stumbles through his words, scowling as he clicks through to his inbox calendar. Sure enough, innocuously slotted after an end-of-the-week wrap up with his team and an appointment with a client is the suit fitting.
Then it hits him.
“Can you believe there’s only 6 weeks until the wedding,” Kirishima is saying in his ear excitedly. “We’ll be flying out before you know it!”
Katsuki can’t remember the rest of his conversation with Kirishima because his brain fully enters panic mode with alarms blaring and emergency red lights flashing. His mind begins a metaphorical downward spiral as he realizes he is absolutely not prepared to go to this wedding. Not because he’s not ready for his best man duties – he is – but because the impulsive challenge he issued Mina and the others is just now coming back to him.
He’d set it aside after that night, quite literally out of sight and out of mind, because it hadn’t seemed so significant. He’d arrogantly assumed he’d start dating in time. After all, there was little over a year to figure it out. If the rest of his idiot friends had managed it, why couldn’t he?
Instead, Katsuki had continued to live life much the same as he always did, in a cycle of eat, sleep, work, rinse and repeat. In fact, his poor personal life is even worse now.
With his parents finally stepping down, Katsuki had risen to the task of managing their textiles company, a duty he’d been training for nearly his entire life. It was an expected transition, but it had still taken the majority of his focus for the past year. The company is doing amazingly, of course; no one expected any less from him.
But his bed is still empty.
He remains alone.
Shaking off the anxiety, Katsuki starts to brainstorm. While he’s tempted to pick someone at random, he knows his friends, especially Mina, will be immediately suspicious if he shows up to the wedding with some extra. On the flipside, he’s likely to be more successful if he brings someone Mina doesn’t know. Less likely there will be complications, but who in his life can he trust enough to rope into this kind of scheme?
His rumination is disrupted by the shrill ringing of his phone. He groans out loud when he sees that it’s his mother calling. He can ignore her call, but there are always consequences when he does.
He decides to pick up instead with a rudely growled, “What?”
“Katsuki, you damn workaholic, will you at least call us once a month?”
“Shut up, old hag, I call you guys plenty!” he snaps, instantly irritated.
“Not nearly as much as Inko’s sweet son does!” his mother shrieks in his ear. “Izuku lives overseas and he manages to call her at least once a week!”
A light bulb goes off in Katsuki’s mind.
He can work with this.
Midoriya Izuku, or Deku, hasn’t crossed Katsuki’s mind in a while. He’s a prominent feature in Katsuki’s childhood memories, and also a highlight in middle school memories that he really regrets and would rather forget. Katsuki had been an ass to Deku for the majority of his childhood. While college had allowed their paths to cross again, now older and more mature, Katsuki had struggled with the guilt and shame of his past behavior in his interactions with Deku.
Deku had been polite, even kind, and Katsuki had been, well – himself. Abrasive to everyone, but Deku always had his attention when classes brought them together. Otherwise, they kept separate friend groups, had different schedules and diverging long-term goals. They were civil with each other and occasionally had run into each other in town when they went back home to visit their families. They shared a couple of classes throughout college, worked on at least one group project together without incident, and then graduated and went their separate ways without much fanfare.
Maybe Deku had never outright said he didn’t want much to do with him in college, but Katsuki had always felt like he’d let his opportunity to make things right slip through his fingers and so he kept his distance.
Therefore, he knows this is going to be extremely awkward. It was a moment of weakness to think he could ask Deku for a favor . For a moment, Katsuki contemplates hiring a fake boyfriend instead, a stranger off the internet or something. It would probably be less painful.
But Katsuki is not the type of guy who backs down from a challenge or potentially embarrassing situation. He barges right in and makes his case.
So he grits his teeth and sits down to craft his message. He tries a few different variations of hi , hello , and how are you , before he finally decides to just cut to the chase.
Hey, this is Bakugou Katsuki. I know it’s been a while, but I’d like to talk to you if you’ll hear me out. I could use your help with something.
Admitting he needs help with anything gives Katsuki heartburn. He forces himself to set his phone aside once he sends the message, but it doesn’t take too long before his phone pings with a telltale sound of an incoming text. The reply comes much quicker than he anticipated. It’s stupid, but his heart beats a little faster at the notification and it takes him a second before he opens the message.
[Deku]: Of course! I’m too curious to say no. Let me know when we can chat.
[Katsuki]: Can you do 9pm JST?
[Deku]: Sure! I’ll call you
When the call comes through, Katsuki feels his heart skip a beat as he accepts it.
“Kacchan!” Deku says cheerfully, as if no time has passed. “How are you doing?”
Katsuki’s brain short circuits. Kacchan? He hasn’t heard that childhood nickname in so many years. Hearing it used now so casually makes him feel like he’s a kid again. He’d at least expected Bakugou, so the nickname gives him a little bit of hope for the conversation ahead.
“Good,” Katsuki replies on autopilot, then catches himself and adds, “Thanks for taking my call on such short notice.”
“There’s no way I wouldn’t,” Deku says. “I can’t believe it’s been five years since we last talked or saw each other!”
He’s being so nice, it’s making Katsuki itch. Not a hint of resentment, just genuine friendliness.
“I know it’s weird to reach out to you out of the blue like this,” he starts, but Izuku waves off his stilted attempt at formalities.
“Kacchan, I’ve known you since we were in diapers,” he says with a little laugh. “It’s totally okay. What’s up?”
Katsuki feels a flush of embarrassment begin its slow crawl up the back of his neck as he launches into an abbreviated explanation of his circumstances. Deku listens politely, inserting soft noises of acknowledgement in all the right places, without a hint of judgment throughout. Katsuki’s on the lookout for it but he just catches a soft sound of amusement on the other end of the line when he finally gets to the heart of the matter. Even though Deku can’t see it, Katsuki scowls in response, well aware of how ridiculous it all sounds.
After a moment of contemplative silence, Deku finally says, “Let me get this straight… you want me to pretend to be your long-distance boyfriend and go to your best friend’s wedding with you in a month?”
“Yes,” Katsuki says, grinding his teeth, trying to stop himself from getting defensive. “All expenses paid.”
Deku still sounds doubtful as he asks, “Won’t your friends think it’s weird they haven’t heard about me at all?”
“I’m a private person,” Katsuki explains. “Besides, we can always say we’ve been keeping it quiet because of the long-distance. Since we’ve known each other since childhood, I figured it’d be pretty easy to sell the rest.”
“Ah!” Deku says, “Right, okay, we have that little bit of truth to help sell the lie.”
Thinking of the depth of the lie makes Katsuki uncomfortable, but his reputation among his friends is at stake. Besides, is it really so criminal to want someone at his side as he goes through the ordeal of his best friends getting married?
“Look, I know it’s a big ask. If you’ve got other things going on, it’s fine.”
“I’m flattered, but… why me?” Deku asks.
Katsuki freezes. He knows there’s genuine curiosity behind the question, but he’s entirely unprepared to answer honestly. He closes his eyes, almost imagining the way Deku’s intensely green eyes would be trained on him as he waits patiently for an answer.
“You were the most logical choice,” Katsuki blurts out.
There’s a distinct silent pause after that. Then Deku clears his throat and says, “Right, of course. Makes sense.”
Katsuki hears someone speaking in the background of the call, their voice just slightly too far away for him to make out. Deku replies in English, too quick for Katsuki to catch. He says, “Listen, I have a meeting to run to. Let me check my calendar, brainstorm some logistics, and I’ll let you know.”
“Sure. No obligations.”
Their call ends and Katsuki lets out a long exhale as he drops down onto his couch. He hadn’t even realized that he spent the entire time pacing up and down the length of his living room.
All in all, it went much better than expected. At least Izuku hadn’t told him to fuck off right from the start.
Instead, he gets a ping on his phone later the next morning that makes him grin fiercely.
[Deku]: Let's do this!