Work Text:
News on the station travelled fast. Everyone knows that, but trying to keep information on the station was difficult.
Quark had no idea how much danger he put himself in daily by partnering himself up with Odo. Odo’s status as the shapeshifter of Terok Nor, the changeling spy on DS9, the Cardassian collaborator, the unkillable weapon of the Bajorans .. the list goes on. Most of those, Odo can put behind himself, but allowing Quark to become a target was a scary thought.
Quark hadn’t realised how much would change if his relationship with Odo became public knowledge. Infact, his local syndicates who’s plans were foiled by Odo, actually respected Quark for his persistence. How any criminal could get away with anything right under the shapeshifter's nose was incredible. Joining forces with him made Quark look like a sell out and Odo look like some sort of monster who kept the Ferengi on a leash.
Behind closed doors was a whole other story.
“Odo, did you move my shoes?”
“I thought you wanted me to move them?”
“Why would I want that?”
“Because they’re your good shoes and we don’t have anything planned.”
“But now I can’t find them.”
“But why do you need them?”
“Just in case?!”
“Incase of what?”
“Why are you judging me for trying to look pretty?”
“I’m not judging you.”
“Why are you yelling?!”
“Your shoes are under the bed!”
Arguments like this are what keep them together. Constant critiques and misunderstandings were how they stayed on the same page, ironically enough. There was something wrong when they stopped telling each other what to do. This was the part of their relationship that outsiders never saw. Every gang, syndicate and terrorist group knew about Quark and Odo, but only their neighbours heard the domestic side of it.
The benefit to this agreement of disagreements is how other people suddenly stop listening when they think they know what’s going on.
One example of their relationship working in perfect harmony was just last week.
“Quark, I got a notification today about a docked ship called the boot. Apparently I arrested its last owners when they were last on the station.”
Quark nods while rearranging glasses. “Yeah, you remember those guys who brought all that tech to the station and started transferring money from peoples thumb prints?”
Odo snapped his fingers. “Yes, I remember. They tried to blame you after you refused to help them.”
Quark scoffed. “Typical thieves, making threats when they don’t get their own way. I know actual children who can scam the right way.”
“Quark, I think you missed the point. They threatened violence.”
“Oh please, they should know better than to try any threats. The last time they tried and failed, we weren’t even official.”
Odo leaned on the bar with his elbows. “But you did the right thing by letting me help you.”
“I don’t need help. I was just protecting my customers' wallets.”
Odo harrumphs. “Of course.
Quark senses a challenge. “Oh, you think I’m going soft?”
“Poor choice of words, Quark.”
The challenge was wiped from Quark’s face.
Odo laughs. “I think you assume too much from these people. If you think they’d know better than to arrive and start trouble, I’d put money on them trying it anyway.”
Quark leans back over. “Well, why don’t you put your money where your mouth is.”
One perfectly formulated plan later and that gossip chain was broken.
Quark walked to work. He shooed his staff into position and started working on the books. Mornings are always lazy and quiet. Two familiar faces arrive at a table at the back of the room and order drinks. Quark keeps an eye on them and tells his staff to avoid them if they can. Trouble makers he calls them. The staff get ready to call Odo, but knowing Odo, he already knows they’re here and has precautions in place. All the staff have to do is watch their own backs.
After an hour or so, Quark runs out of numbers to crunch and moves to holosuite duty. All he has to do really is watch a timer and shut down programs that run past the allotted times. Beyond that, he checks for damage to the program and holosuite room. Quark’s stalkers watch him climb the stairs and come back down to check the holosuite payments go through at least 50 times before lunch.
The lunch rush happened and those dangerous individuals hadn’t moved from their spot. Quark takes a seat and sends his staff for their breaks, one at a time. After lunch and before dinner are always the emptiest.
Without a full crew running the bar, Quark finally takes it upon himself to do some work.
His stalkers quickly take note and follow as Quark enters the storage room, and his staff are distracted elsewhere.
The two men barge in and use the biggest nearest crates to block the door. Quark spins to see the men trapping them in the room together. He nervously smiles and raises his curled fingers. “Gentlemen, this is the store cupboard, it’s staff on-”
“We know that, Ferengi. We’re here because we got a score to settle.”
Quark’s voice shook. “Is this about the other year? Boy, you really know how to hold a grudge.”
The shorter of the two men pointed. “Do you have any idea how long it took us to restore our name? How many strings we had to pull to get our gear back? Do you have any idea how much money we lost?”
Quark shrugged. “It wasn’t really your money, was it?”
The shorter man yelled and threw himself at Quark. Quark caught his arm sideways to his body and spun to put it behind the man's own back. With his comrade caught, the other man panicked, pulling a small knife from his belt and running at Quark.
Quark didn’t move. The knife was wedged firmly in Quark’s chest, but neither of them even flinched.
Quark tuts. “You really should have known better, but on the plus side, you just helped me win a bet.”
The taller man shook. “What- What are you?”
Quark smiled. “You should be asking ‘who’.” Quark’s body clenched around the knife and his jacket extended like slime out to the perpetrators hand. “You’re both going away for a very long time.”
The shorter man who was still bent with his arm behind his back cried out. “What’s going on?!”
Quark turned to amber goo and both men were repositioned and incapacitated.
The real Quark can be heard hitting the door. “Odo, I swear, I’m charging the station’s security team for any lost merchandise or equipment.”
Odo rolls his eyes. “Calm down, Quark. Nothing got broken.”
Quark went quiet for a moment. “... I lost the bet didn’t I?”
“Unfortunately.”
Quark’s voice got quieter. “Damn it!”
Odo laughed.
Although Odo still can’t get faces right, texture is easy to replicate. Since he spends so much time with Quark, Odo has one face that he can imitate well enough to pass as the real thing, especially when that face is so particular about seeing it done right. Far too many nights of Odo’s life have been spent trying to get Ferengi ears perfect.
In the end, it all paid off though. Endless arguments means they are forever coming up with ideas and communicating clearly. The gossip chain through the station means that the residents will pass on anything and everything they think is relevant and Quark is at the heart of it. Any crime considering stepping foot on this station has his streetwise Ferengi to deal with, and his shapeshifting cop boyfriend.