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It’s 7 PM on a Wednesday when it happens.
Buck lets himself into the Diaz household like he has so many nights before. His key clicks in the lock and he shoves the door open with his hip, arms full of grocery bags with his keys balanced precariously in his grip. He’s met with the scent of the fajitas that Eddie must have whipped up only a little bit ago, and he can hear Christopher’s chattering from the kitchen. It feels so much like home that Buck feels a little warm with it, but he’s been good about not letting himself think like that, trying to preserve what little is left of his sanity.
“Diazes!” He calls, toeing off his shoes in the entryway. “Buck needs a hand.”
“Buck!” Chris’s cheer echoes from the kitchen. Buck feels a grin creeping on his mouth, the kid’s enthusiasm always so infectious and Buck will never understand why he always so excited to see him.
Eddie’s head appears in the entryway, a soft smile on his face as he takes in Buck and the six grocery bags in his arms. He shakes his head fondly and Buck ignores his heart flipping in his chest. He knows that he’s been single for too long at this point, and if it was anyone else, he would just pass it off as general yearning for a relationship, but Eddie smiles at him and he knows that he is in far too deep to write it off.
It's fine. It’s always fine, because as long as he has them in some capacity, he’s fine.
“Hey,” Eddie grins, easing two of the bags out of his arms and giving him a soft smile. “Thanks for picking this all up for us.”
Buck smiles as Eddie leans in and presses a soft kiss to his lips, and Buck feels himself grinning further against his mouth and kissing back before Eddie pulls away, too soon and with that same soft smile on his lips. He eases the bags fully out of Buck’s arms and turns to head into the kitchen, and Buck watches him go with such a fond smile that he feels like he’s going to explode.
And then he freezes and stares at Eddie’s retreating form, his heart constricting in his chest as his brain struggles to catch up with the events of the last twenty seconds. Because kissing? Is not something they have ever done before.
Eddie’s gone before Buck is even finished blinking, his left arm getting heavy with the remaining four grocery bags, but his brain is clearly not catching up with whatever the fuck just happened.
Buck replays it over in his head and pinches himself with his free hand just to make sure he’s not dreaming. He hisses as the spot on his forearm stings a bit, and he can still smell the fajitas from the kitchen, can still hear Christopher’s chatter, and he can still feel the press of Eddie’s mouth against his own. Which is absolutely baffling, because they don’t do that.
He wants to do that, sure, has wanted to do it for literal fucking years now. They hug and they cuddle and they share gentle and tender pats on shoulders. Hands find the small of the other’s back more often than not these days, gazes linger, and Buck swears that there has been some mutual leaning in that’s happened recently, but they have never actually kissed.
But, apparently, that’s something they do now, because Eddie literally just planted one on him and walked away like it was no big deal. And Buck responded like it’s something he’s done a thousand times before, like it’s natural for him to kiss Eddie. And it felt natural, which should be concerning, but is really just – not. Everything feels natural with Eddie.
Lips still tingling and mind still whirring, he shifts the bags to both of his arms, shakes his head, and decides that it’s time to be so, so brave. He walks into the kitchen and pretends that nothing happened.
Eddie is staring at the entryway with wide eyes, a mirror image to what Buck is sure that he looks like. He’s watching Buck with his eyebrows drawn, a frown on his face and the sink still running behind him. Christopher is watching them both with interest, crayons abandoned on the table and an eyebrow raised in a move that looks so much like Eddie that it makes Buck’s heart constrict again.
Buck drops his gaze, ignoring both of the Diaz boys’ looks, and sets the rest of the bags on the counter. He can feel Eddie watching him, his gaze boring into the side of Buck’s head, but Buck is so afraid for what he might say if he looks up and sees the warm brown of Eddie’s eyes again.
Because that – the kiss, the naturalness of it, the fucking domesticity – is all he wants. He wants to be fucking domesticated and he has for a long time, and it feels a little too close to home for him to handle right now, especially if it was just an accident and Eddie is about to apologize.
“Um,” Buck clears his throat. “There’s – sweet potatoes, and some frozen pizzas. I got both skim milk and oat milk for myself, and I got Chris’s Fruit Loops.”
Chris cheers from behind him as Buck unloads the bags.
“And there’s some pasta for that one dish I want to try, and –”
“Buck –” Eddie starts, Buck’s heart flopping in his chest.
He continues, ignoring Eddie’s attempt to interrupt. “And they had those funny pears that you like –”
“Oh my god, they’re not funny, they’re just bosc pears.” Eddie huffs as he says it, but Buck can tell that there’s the familiar fondness in his voice, the one that always seems to be reserved for Buck.
“They’re brown, Eddie, I don’t know why you’d eat a brown fruit.”
Eddie laughs, loud enough to fill the room with Christopher giggling behind him. Buck finally looks up and sees Eddie still watching him, his eyes warm and soft as he watches Buck. The furrow between his eyebrows is gone now, a soft but hesitant smile on his lips, and he’s looking at Buck in a way that looks like –
Oh.
Because it looks like love, and Buck swears that Eddie’s look at him like this so many times in the past. It’s the look he gives Buck when Buck makes dinner for them, and when he offers to help Chris without Eddie even having to ask. It’s the look he gives Buck after a dangerous call, only then it’s mixed with relief and still a hint of worry as he checks Buck over. He’s seen variations of the look directed at Chris, or at Abuela when she teases him, or at Pepa when she pats his cheek fondly and tells him something in Spanish. Buck’s seen so many of Eddie’s different expressions, and he’s seen this one so many times before, but only now does he know what it is.
Buck feels his mouth drop open a little, his heart now thundering in his chest as he watches Eddie just continue to look at him. He keeps darting his eyes to catch Buck’s wandering gaze, not letting Buck look away for longer than a millisecond.
Because if Eddie loves him, and if that kiss was more than just an accident, then Buck – Buck may be able to have everything he wants.
And what he wants isn’t that different than what he has, but he wants – he wants a husband, damn it, specifically Eddie. He wants a ring on his finger that Eddie put there, and he wanst a new last name, a shared house and bed, a kid to call their own. He knows that Eddie tells him all the time that Chris is his kid, too, but he wants the damn adoption papers. He wants it all so much, and he wants Eddie’s mouth on his again, his hands on his waist, his shoulders and his –
“I love you,” Buck says instead of letting his mind wander to slightly more R-rated thoughts. He blinks, because – Jesus, what is with today and things just happening without passing his brain-to-mouth filter? But it feels so natural to say it, so right, like the words belong on his lips, directed at Eddie and no one else.
Eddie’s eyes widen and Buck has half a mind to just turn on his heel and walk out the front door before this can explode in his face. Christopher lets out a squeak from his spot at the table, clearly having no intention of leaving the unfolding drama, and Buck can picture him with his arms folded on the table, head resting on them with an excited glint in his eye. He would turn to see if his suspicions are correct, but he’s too focused on Eddie’s wide eyes and open mouth.
“I’m in love with you,” Buck adds, again wondering why he’s still talking when his intentions were to just turn and walk away. “To clarify. In case you didn’t know what I meant. Like, so in love with you that that kiss felt natural –”
“Kiss?!” Christopher screeches from behind them. “You kissed?!”
Eddie and Buck both huff at the same time, Buck waving his hand in the universal sign for later at Chris as he continues to squawk from the table.
“And I’ve known for so long, but I want – I just want this, Eddie, I want you. And . . .” He pauses, a small grin forming on his lips as he sees Eddie’s eyes lighting up at his words, a smile spreading across his own mouth. “And I want more of that,” he nods towards the entryway of the house. “And I just want – all of it.”
Eddie is full on smiling now, and he takes the few steps around the island and away from the sink until he’s standing in front of Buck again. He looks at Buck, warm, brown eyes looking into his own, and hesitates for only a second before reaching out and tugging on the front of Buck’s shirt, pulling him closer until they’re only inches apart.
“Evan,” Eddie murmurs, and they’re close enough now where Buck can feel his breath blowing across his face. “I’d marry you right now if you wanted.”
“What is happening?!” Chris squawks, voice high and excited. Buck hears his chair scrape across the floor, but he’s not interested in looking to see what the kid is doing, too invested in Eddie in front of him and his mouth so close to his own.
“What.” Buck deadpans, but Eddie just laughs softly, breathing blowing across Buck’s mouth, before he cups Buck’s jaw, leans in, and kisses him again.
It’s still soft, just like the first one five minutes ago was, but this time, Eddie’s hand is controlling the angle, pulling Buck’s head down, angling his jaw in just the right way so that their mouths can slot easily together. Buck’s own hands drift to Eddie’s waist, fisting in his shirt and pulling him closer. He presses himself against Eddie, Eddie’s hand sliding to the back of his head, and Buck feels himself open for Eddie as he gently tugs on his hair.
Eddie’s hand is warm in his hair, on his shoulder, his waist hot against Buck’s own hands where he’s gripping him so close, afraid to let him go and for the dream to fade away. Buck feels himself stumble backward a little with the force as Eddie presses impossibly closer, his hip hitting the counter, and they startle apart at the force of the jolt.
Buck just breathes into Eddie’s space, mouth centimeters from his own, lips brushing with every breath as they both try to intake as much oxygen as possible. Eddie’s lips are red and plump, his eyes shining, a smile on his face as his hand cards through Buck’s hair. Buck feels himself leaning in without even thinking about it, and he’s just about to capture Eddie’s mouth again when a groan sounds from behind them.
“What. Is. Happening.” Chris says, voice loud enough to cause them to startle apart again. They fully jump away from each other this time, Buck grinning a little at how rumpled Eddie’s shirt is.
“Uh,” Eddie stammers. “I – that.”
“Yep,” Buck nods, still watching Eddie, because it feels like it’s impossible for him to not look at Eddie right now. “That’s what’s happening.”
“Grown-ups are so weird,” Christopher huffs, grabbing his crutches and heading across the kitchen.
“Christopher,” Eddie’s voice is firmer now, eyes darting to Chris as he makes an exit for the kitchen. His got his dad-voice out and his dad-look on his face, and it just reminds Buck of how he wants everything with him. “Just because you don’t understand –”
“—doesn’t make something weird,” Chris sighs and rolls his eyes, and it looks so much like Eddie that Buck feels himself met on the spot. “I know. But –”
“We are weird,” Buck agrees with a nod. “He’s right, Eddie.”
Christopher nods, satisfied, and makes his way out of the room. “I’ll be in my room if you need me,” he tells them dramatically, pausing at the entryway and giving them both a smile. “But I’m extremely happy about this. Just so you both know.”
Buck feels a smile spreading across his face, and he has half a mind to chase after the kid and wrap him in a hug, but he’s distracted from the thought by Eddie’s hand tugging gently on his wrist, tugging him back into his space and pressing him against the counter.
“Buck,” he murmurs, arms bracketing him and warm along the length of Buck’s body. His nose bumps Buck’s as he talks, Buck’s own arms finding their spot at Eddie’s waist again. “I love you.”
Buck tugs him close and Eddie stumbles closer, mouth warm and open and wanting as Eddie wraps one arm low across his waist. He tastes like fajita and coffee from what Buck knows was probably his fifth cup of the day. They kiss until Eddie’s hands start to wander to Buck’s thighs, until he lifts Buck onto the counter and presses even closer, until their lips are sore and chapped and red, until their hair is mussed and their shirts are wrinkled and crooked.
Eddie checks in on Christopher before he drags Buck to bed, and it’s the most natural and normal thing for them. He’s surprised that it feels like almost nothing has changed, even though he knows everything has.
“I love you,” Eddie says again, pressing Buck into the mattress and kissing him for what is now the millionth time. “I’m glad that kiss happened.”
“Felt like the most natural thing in the world,” Buck whispers with a nod as he tugs Eddie on top of him, and he knows that this is always where they were going to end up.