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Memories Lost, Memories Gained, and Memories Made

Summary:

False's life in the past few months has been one continuous, hellish nightmare. Being dropped off in a new and unfamiliar world, surrounded by people she doesn't know, with no memory of who she is or where she came from, has left her more paranoid than she's ever been. She has no idea what she's doing, or how she's ever going to get home.

But then comes Pixlriffs. The archaeologist is kind and generous, and begins the work of slowly breaking down the walls she's put up around her heart. But there's something... off about him. Quick moments where he doesn't seem quite... real, thinking she saw something horrific out of the corner of her eye, only to turn and see him standing there, random appearances at the most convenient of times, it's not big, but it's starting to add up.

There's something weird about her new friend. But what is it? And does it even matter?

AKA: Eldritch God Pixlriffs adopts traumatized amnesiac FalseSymmetry

(Title is a WIP)

Notes:

Woo! Okay, here we go! Another fic to add to the pile (Looks at Wolf Mother and the Superhero AU)

I'm super excited for this one, I was talking with someone on tumblr about what kind of vibes Pixl gives off, and then I decided to take that, as well as Pixl and false's SINGULAR interaction, and RUN with it/

CW: Slight unreality, discussion of identity existentialism (kind of), unhealthy habits

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter Text

False shouldn’t be here. That was the only thought going through her mind right now. She shouldn’t be bothering the poor man, no matter how nice he had been to her during their first encounter.

He was probably just as cordial to anyone else who came across his campsite, and besides, she’d brought goods to trade that time around. Of course he’d want to stay on her good side if she had something he wanted. Absolutely nothing about their conversation suggested he even liked her, and yet-

And yet she still found herself crossing the Great Bridge, past her hot air balloon, nearing the gates of the ancient capital. They were enormous, looming far above her and widened just enough that a small cart could pass through, just barely. 

Setting one hand on the metal, she wondered idly what kind of mechanism would be required to open such a heavy thing, and if the man who built it would allow her to get a closer look, but quickly shook herself of the thought. Bringing it up was out of the question, it was far too forward for someone she had only just met, and she had no idea how asking to see the inner workings of one of his greatest defenses would go over. He could easily read it as her trying to find a weakness.

Nervously, she reached up and ran her fingers through her hair, anxiously brushing out the tangled locks. This was stupid, she shouldn’t be here, it was foolish to think that one good interaction meant they were anything even close to friends, but… he had been… kind to her thus far. 

She was definitely pushing it by coming back again uninvited, without anything to trade, especially when she had no idea how far his hospitality would stretch, but even still. 

Out of the others she’d met, each the ruler of their own area, none of them had been cruel to her. But many were a bit too enthusiastic, eager to invite themselves in and inspect her base. She knew it was smaller than theirs’, and could almost feel their judgment, even as they complimented her on her skills. 

And even the more subdued of them were still so intimidating. They were all queens and kings, princesses and princes, ladies and lords. They all held so much power that she didn’t, and she was sure they were just as aware of it as she was. 

But… he wasn’t any of that. He was just… an archaeologist. A historian. He was reconstructing the past, trying to learn all that he could from it. There was something about the man that she was drawn to, almost as if she were being pulled towards him by an invisible tether. Ever since their first meeting on the bridge, she’d been unable to think of anything else. And now she was back here, against her better judgment. 

Taking a deep breath, False stepped through the gates, taking in the sights of the buildings on either side of her. They were all in various states of reconstruction, and looked like they were meant to be… shops of some kind, maybe an inn or two. Just average, everyday buildings. The kinds you would find in the streets of her old world… she thought. 

But then again, she wouldn’t know, now would she? 

Walking down the street, she was greeted with the sight of the statue, a magnificent display of a winged woman with a golden halo radiating from her back. In her hand she held a sword, and her dress and hair billowed in an imaginary wind, forever immortalized in stone. 

Looking down upon the rest of the ancient capital, ruins lying about, she spotted the campsite she’d seen last time, a small wisp of smoke rising from the firepit surrounded by logs, despite only one person living there. 

She couldn’t see the archaeologist at the moment, but she was fairly certain he had to be around here somewhere. The alternative was that he was off in some other empire, and she’d come all this way for nothing, and she’d rather spare herself the humiliation. 

It was a long walk down to the ground again, so instead of taking the time to go all the way around the capital, she leapt off the edge of the viewing platform and glided to the ground. Well, more like faceplanted, her landing skills could use some work, but she was pleased to see how smoothly her elytra folded shut on its own. 

“Hello?” She called hesitantly, looking around. She still didn’t see the archaeologist anywhere, and anxiety was once again starting to creep at her edges. Perhaps he was in that crypt underneath the statue- she’d seen a glimpse of it on the way to the froglight orchard. 

The orchard! Maybe he was there, harvesting the froglights for his next trade. Or maybe he was in the wheat fields. This place was truly enormous, there were so many places he could be. 

Or, perhaps he really had gone adventuring somewhere else, and wasn’t here at all. On the other hand, the fire had only recently gone out, there was still smoke coming from the embers, so it couldn’t have been too long since he’d left. 

“Is anyone home?” She called to the open space, eyes scanning her surroundings once more. There was no answer, and for a few moments, everything around her seemed almost unnaturally still. It was completely quiet, save for a few birds chirping. False waited, but nothing happened, and she let out a sigh, disappointed for a reason she couldn’t name. 

“Ah, hello again. Back so soon?” A voice came suddenly from behind her. False shrieked and whipped around, seeing the archaeologist standing behind her, holding the reins of his dodo, Winchester. He chuckled when he saw her expression, holding up a hand. “Sorry, didn’t mean to frighten you.” 

“Frighten” was an understatement. She hadn’t even heard him coming, where in the name of the gods that she didn’t know if she believed in had he come from? He certainly hadn’t been there two seconds ago! 

“U-uh- H-hello! Um- hi, again.” She stuttered, nervously reaching up and trying to loosen her collar so that it didn’t feel like it was squeezing her throat. The archaeologist just smiled in response.

“Hello.” He repeated. “It’s a pleasure to see you. What brings you around these parts?” He gestured behind him to the ruins. “Did you run out of froglights already?” 

False flushed, anxiety coming back in full force. Great, just how was she supposed to explain this one? “Oh- I uh- no, I still have plenty, thank you. I was just… passing through the area and thought I’d stop by.” Oh sure, like that was convincing. Might as well just tell him she was desperate for any sort of normal human interaction outright. 

Indeed, the glint in his eye suggested that he did know she wasn’t telling the truth, but mercifully, he didn’t comment on it, simply tied Winchester to a fence post and started walking towards the fire. 

“Well in that case, welcome my friend. Have you eaten?” He asked, placing a log from a stack of wood into the firepit and reaching for his pocket. He pulled out a box of matches and lit one, tossing it onto the log, and after just a few moments, it caught. 

False’s stomach rumbled on cue, and she became acutely aware that she had not, in fact, eaten since the burnt loaf of bread she’d had this morning. The archaeologist gave her a knowing look, and gestured for her to sit on one of the log benches. Feeling ever so slightly embarrassed, she complied. 

“I’m actually glad you stopped by, today.” The archaeologist said as he pulled out a grill plate and set it over the fire. “Our last interaction was rather brief. I’ll admit, I’m a bit curious about you.” 

“How so?” False asked warily, leaning back slightly as if he were about to take the quickly heating iron and throw it at her face. Which, realistically, he probably wouldn’t, if only because he was wearing fingerless gloves and would burn his fingers, but better safe than sorry.

The man laughed cheerily, sending her a cheeky smile. “No need to look so worried, it’s nothing bad, I promise.” He placed a slab of raw beef on the grill, the meat sizzling as soon as it was set down, and sat down across from her, a pair of tongs in his hand. 

“I’ve never been good at small talk, so I suppose I’ll just ask. See, the thing is, almost every other ruler has come to see me at this point, since froglight trees are a rather rare commodity. I feel like I know them decently well, have a general sense for their character at least. And even the ones I have yet to meet in person, I still feel like I know something about. But you… you puzzle me.” 

He paused, looking her up and down, taking in her appearance. “I haven’t seen you since the campfire meeting. In fact, hardly anyone has. You rarely interact with anyone unless they come directly to you, and even then it seems as though you’re trying to get them to leave as soon as possible.” 

False swallowed, suddenly feeling herself go cold despite the fire not three feet from her. How could he possibly know all of that? Did all the rulers just… gather together and gossip about her? Or was she just that weird that they couldn’t help but bring it up in conversation? The archaeologist continued on, oblivious to her increasing panic. 

“Of course, you’re hardly the first recluse I’ve ever met, but you most certainly are the most mysterious.” His eyes narrowed slightly, something akin to intrigue sparking within them, though the rest of his expression remained amiable. “I mean, I don’t even know your name.” 

“It’s False.” She interrupted, coughing into her hand. “S-sorry. Uh, my name is False.” She chewed her thumbnail, eyes darting to the side. “I don’t believe I caught your name either.” 

The archaeologist nodded. “I go by Pixl.” He told her. “So I suppose it’s a pleasure to formally meet you.” Pixl stood up and quickly flipped the steak over to the other side to keep it from burning. 

“You as well.” False said, shoulders raising self consciously, though she wasn’t sure why. Silence fell for a few moments, nothing but the crackling of the fire surrounding them. “Am I…” She hesitated, looking down at her hands. “Am I really that strange?” She asked quietly.

Pixl looked up at her with kind eyes and a warm smile. “You are an oddity, Miss False.” False looked away, shame curling in her chest. So that was how people thought of her. 

Pixl noticed, and his smile dropped. He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees and locking his fingers together. “I don’t mean that negatively.” He continued. “There is nothing wrong with being a little strange.” 

As he said that, something strange passed over his expression, a flicker of something indescribable. Just for a moment, his face suddenly seemed… not quite right, like an ill fitting mask, but there was no difference she could put a name to. It was gone in a second, though, and False didn’t really take note of it. 

“Isn’t there?” She fidgeted with her fingers. Pixl looked at her, seemingly puzzled, before understanding dawned on him, and the smile returned to his face.

“Ah, but I forget.” He shook his head and chuckled to himself. “Most… people don’t like to stand out, do they? You’d all rather blend into the background and be forgotten.” 

False huffed, crossing her arms defensively. “In my experience, it’s better that way. Nothing ever good comes from garnering so much attention.” 

“Huh.” Pixl said, putting a hand to his chin as if in deep thought. “Being forgotten is better than ever being noticed… now isn’t that something. How in the history of the world did that idea come about?” 

False looked at him, incredulous. “Are you saying that you wouldn’t prefer to blend in with everyone else? Don’t you worry about being mocked?” That didn’t make any sense. Who would risk ridicule from everyone around them like that? 

Pixl’s smile widened. “Not at all. I think my eccentricities are the best part about me.” He checked the meat again, and found it sufficiently cooked. Using the tongs he’d set aside, he picked it up off the grill and pulled a plate out of his bag- where had the bag come from?- before setting the steak down on it and passing it to her. 

She stared at it dumbly, then looked back up at the archaeologist, who tilted his head to the side curiously. 

A few seconds passed before his eyes widened, and he snapped his fingers. “Oh! Right, utensils.” He laughed again, pulling a knife and fork out of the same bag. “Sorry, I guess I’ve gotten so used to eating with my hands that I forget not everyone does.” He passed it to her over the fire, showing no signs that he even felt the blazing heat. The flames licked at his rolled sleeves, but surprisingly, didn’t catch. 

False forced herself to turn her attention away from that, and back to the steak on her lap. She cleared her throat, setting the utensils aside, and met Pixl’s eyes.

“Are you not going to eat?” She asked.

“Oh, no, I just ate an hour or so ago, so I’m not really hungry. But you go ahead.” Pixl waved her off. 

Then why’d you make me food, False wondered. But she didn’t say it out loud, and instead took the knife and fork up again. 

She ate in silence, trying her best not to devour the steak and lick the plate as Pixl stared into the fire, lost in thought. She was really hungry, and it was really good. When she was finished, she didn’t have a napkin, and looked around for a bit before just giving in and wiping her mouth with the back of her hand. It was gross, but whatever, she could wash it later. 

Pixl noticed her doing this, slightly amused, before wordlessly handing her a pouch of water. She uncorked it and downed the whole thing in a few gulps, sighing as she finished and tossing it back to him.

“Do you not have a steady food source at your base?” He asked, a hint of a smile on his lips, but his eyes were serious. 

False shook her head. “I do, I just… got caught up in my latest project.” Well, that, and running her and Pixl’s previous conversation through her head over and over, analyzing every last detail she could recall. “Lost track of time.” 

She’d been trying to work on her wings again. She’d noticed the gears would often get stuck when she tried to fold them up, and would require taking them off and manually forcing them back down. She’d gotten so absorbed in her work and her thoughts, she just… didn’t realize how long she’d been in her workshop until she’d already finished. 

“I see.” Pixl frowned thoughtfully. “Do you tend to lose track of time often?” 

False shrugged. “Yeah, maybe a few times a week. I don’t know, I don’t really write it down anywhere.” She joked. Pixl hummed, almost sounding concerned, and she laughed nervously, suddenly realizing that that probably wasn’t normal for most people. “Well, you know how it is. Everyone forgets themselves once in a while. Don’t you?”

Pixl blinked, giving her a look that said he knew exactly what she was doing, but answered anyway. “I can’t say that I don’t. Surrounded by the remains of the past, it’s hard not to get lost in it. Sometimes… it takes me a little while to come back to the present.” 

False nodded. “I suppose it’s the same with me and my workshop.” She sighed. “I spend most of my time there anyway.”

“I understand. The real world can be a scary place, can’t it?” Pixl pulled out a second water pouch for himself and took a sip. “But no matter how hard we wish we could, it’s not something we can just ignore.” 

False felt like he was referencing something specific, from the way he looked at her out of the corner of his eye, though she wasn’t sure if he was referring to something in his life, or hers. Because… that statement did hit closer to home than she’d like to admit.

She thought about the mysterious statue that kept moving about on its own, the signs that kept appearing in her base even though she’d put up several more security measures to try and keep whoever was placing them out. She thought about the current, biggest predicament she was in, which was being stuck in another universe without any recollection of where she came from, only the knowledge that this place was wrong.  

She’d been doing her best to just… keep on rolling with it, and ignore the parts that were a little too creepy for her tastes, but she knew she couldn’t keep doing it forever. Eventually, something would catch up with her. Whether it be her past, whatever that might be, the danger the signs kept warning her about, or both.

For someone who didn’t know much about her, Pixl sure seemed to know exactly what to say to get under her skin. 

“I guess so.” She said, fiddling with a piece of hair. Something in her tone or her face must have given away her nervousness, because Pixl’s expression softened.

“Ah, it would seem this conversation has gotten a little too serious.” Pixl got up, walked across to the log False was sitting on, and sat down next to her. “My apologies if I struck a nerve.” 

“You struck several.” False replied, half heartedly joking and attempting a grin. But truth be told this whole conversation was a lot, especially considering she had only just met Pixl. It almost felt like this was deliberate, that he knew just how close to bone he cut, but… that was impossible. They’d only had one conversation, two, now. She couldn’t be that easy to read, could she?

“Sorry about that.” Pixl reached out and set a hand on her shoulder, but quickly withdrew when she flinched, tensing up on an instinct she didn’t know where she had learned. “As you can imagine, I don’t get many visitors. My people skills could use some work.” 

“Mine too.” False admitted. But then she paused. “I thought you said you’d met with all the other rulers?” 

Pixl’s eyes widened just a fraction, and he coughed into his fist. “I have. But they don’t tend to come here on social visits very often. It’s almost always because they need more froglights for whatever project they’re working on. That doesn’t tend to leave a whole lot of room for casual conversation.” 

“Oh… that’s…” False bit her lip, trying to think of how to end that sentence. “...Sad?” She settled on, though she cringed immediately. ‘Sad.’ Really? 

“Oh, it’s alright. It’s not like I’m much better.” Pixl sighed and shook his head, grinning. “I don’t tend to interact with them much in person either.” 

“What do you mean in person?” False asked. “What, do you all send letters to one another? Is there some other form of communication I’m not aware of?” 

Pixl gave her a quizzical look. “Do you not have a communicator?” 

“A what?” False shook her head, bewildered. Pixl didn’t answer her, just gave her a look and reached for his bag again, pulling out a small, rectangular device with a smooth, glass screen. He pressed a button on the side, and the screen lit up. He held it out for her to inspect, revealing… some sort of messaging system, complete with a digital keyboard.

“A communicator.” He repeated. “It’s a device we use to talk to one another over long distances. Do you really not have one?” 

False shook her head, taking the device from Pixl to study it closer. “No, I’ve never seen anything like it.” At least, she didn’t think she had. It was hard to know when she didn’t remember anything about her home. Pixl didn’t say anything for a few moments, long enough that False glanced up to see if she’d said something wrong. Perhaps he thought she was stupid for not knowing about what was clearly a common form of technology here.

“Keep it.” He said finally. “We all carry around an extra around since most of us tend to go out exploring quite a bit, and several of the others have made a habit of losing theirs. But I’m not the type to partake in many harrowing adventures, so I don’t really need it.” 

“O-oh, no, that’s okay, thank you.” False felt a bit of panic. She couldn’t take this! “I don’t have anything to pay for it on me right now… but! I can go back and get some iron, if you’d like. Or a couple enchanting books if you need any, or- or maybe something else? I don’t know what else I have, but I can-”

Pixl placed his hands overtop of hers, lowering them from where they’d come up to a defensive position without her even realizing. 

“No payment.” He said, smiling. “Consider it a gift. From a friend.” 

“A… friend…?” False looked down at the communicator and Pixl’s hands, and felt her grip on the device tighten. Could they be considered friends? They’d only spoken twice, and False hadn’t even done anything for him. They’d traded, but that wasn’t a sign of friendship, that was just… a business exchange. And Pixl had made her food, and now he was giving her this, even though she hadn’t given him anything in return yet. 

Did that qualify them as friends?

“A-at least let me pay for the food!” She said, looking back up at Pixl, her… friend? Something sad entered his gaze, and he shook his head, pushing the communicator back towards her and releasing her hands. 

“Don’t worry about it, I have plenty, and you needed it more than I did.” She opened her mouth to protest, but he held up a finger, cutting her off. “Seriously, it’s just a bit of food. Nothing I can’t replace easily. I don’t need any sort of payment for it.” 

“Are you sure?” False asked. There had to be a catch- there was no way someone would just… give their resources out for free like that. And- and a communicator? This had to be at least somewhat expensive technology, and what happens if he did lose the one he still had? Would he have to build another one from scratch? 

“Absolutely.” Pixl assured her, giving her one last grin. He sighed, and picked up the dirty plate and utensils still on the log. “I hope you don’t mind, but I do have a few errands I need to run, so I should really get going.” He set the plate down on the grill and picked up his bag, slinging it across his body. 

“U-uh, right. Yeah. Me too.” False lied. She had nowhere she needed to be, other than back at her workshop. But… she had probably overstayed her welcome enough as it was, right? “It- it was nice talking to you.” 

“A pleasure.” Pixl agreed, nodding. “I’ll see you around?” He asked, tilting his head to the side questioningly. 

“Um… yeah.” False said, although really, she was ready to flee the scene. This whole interaction had been too confusing for her taste, she was ready to go back to Cogsmeade, where things made sense, and lock herself in her house for the next few hours. 

Pixl turned around and waved, before starting to walk off. False waited until he was a decent distance away before she turned around and bolted, launching herself into the air and flying off in the direction of her home.