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Kokichi Oma does not participate in the bear's awful excuse for a dating game.
Sure, he talks to the others when they approach him. But he spends most of his time exploring the academy; he'd rather dedicate his time trying to escape than to schmoozing.
He's not the only one, either. Kokichi often catches Rantaro up to his own devices, a restless energy to him that hints at something outside the walls that he desperately wants to get back to. Kaito, too, acts like finding love is the furthest thing from his mind; he'd probably be pretty popular if he didn't tell anyone who would listen how much he needs to get to space, how he can't afford to waste any time.
Kokichi has seen them all prod at the walls of their prison, even the ones who don't seem entirely resistant to it, but no one finds any cracks.
—
Angie is murdered a week into their stay.
"I said the killing game was cancelled!!" Monokuma roars, having gathered them in the gym for a lecture. "This is a dating game, a romance! Stay in the genre, you're ruining the atmosphere!!"
"Who cares about that?!" Tenko shouts, red face streaked with angry tears. "Tell us which degenerate killed Angie!"
"Oh, that?” Without hesitating Monokuma points a paw into the group. “It was Korekiyo!"
A ceiling projector comes to life a second later, playing footage on the wall behind Monokuma. The video of Angie’s death is graphic and horrible, resulting in at least one puddle of vomit on the gymnasium floor, but Kokichi can't stop watching.
Specifically he can't stop noticing how many different angles the video has, and how high the camera quality is.
—
Nanotechnology. That's what he and Miu find when they look into his hunch: thousands of microscopic cameras recording their every move.
Korekiyo hasn't been seen since Monokuma took him away for his 'punishment', so—assuming there were no more serial killers secretly amongst them—no one was technically in danger while staying at the academy. But Kokichi can't relax now that he knows he's under surveillance; he feels like an animal in a captivity, being scrutinized like some fucked up zoo exhibit.
The cage surrounding their enclosure is more suffocating by the day. Kokichi needs to get out, and he needs to take the others with him.
—
It takes a lot of pestering and a few threats of future annoyance, but Kokichi gets Kaito to accept his date ticket.
He's hoping the guy's big astronaut brain means he's smart enough to catch onto his plan without him saying it out loud. Kokichi can't afford to explain anything outright, not when even the faintest whisper could be caught by one of those cameras hovering in an ear canal.
Instead he knocks knees with the Luminary of the Stars, sitting beside him as they admire flowers in the Shrine of Judgment. "Before we go any further with this, I want to make something clear. Are you okay with polyamory?"
"Poly…what?"
"Polyamory.” Kokichi’s tone is dry, like he’s slowly reading a dictionary to a confused child. “ Poly meaning many, and amory coming from amorous, meaning love."
"Okay, but what does that mean? "
Kokichi rolls his eyes. "It means being able to fall in love with multiple people at the same time. That should have been kinda obvious."
"Wait, that's a thing?"
"For some people! And I'm one of them." Knocking his knees against Kaito's again, he continued: "I'm interested in you, Kaito, but I aaaaaalso might be interested in Shuichi. And I just want to be sure you two don't end up pulling a Korekiyo and try to kill each other because of it."
Kaito bristles at the implication, sitting straight like he'd been challenged. "There's no way I'd do that! What are you even asking, anyway?!"
Kaito, the big dumb idiot, still looks like he doesn't get it. "I'm asking if you would be open to me dating both of you."
"Can you even do that?"
"Only one way to find out!" Turning toward the entrance of the shrine, Kokichi cups his hands around his mouth before shouting, "Yoo-hoo, Monokuma!"
Immediately the bear appears—not from the front door, but rather out of the fountain. "Hey, why are you calling someone to crash your own date? Just so you know I'm a bear, not a unicorn!"
"Really?? I thought you were a cat!" Quickly twisting his wowed expression into a scowl, Kokichi declares, "Nevermind that, though! I need to ask you a question!"
"What do you want? Dating advice? Condoms?”
Deciding to ignore the blithering bear, Kokichi jumps into his explanation. "I'm polyamorous, and I intend to engage in some good old-fashioned polyamory! But you said we leave if we fall in love, right?" Tilting his head, Kokichi softens his voice into something timid and unsure. "I want to enjoy this game to the fullest, but I wouldn't feel right finding love unless I could have a future with all the people I care about. If I date multiple people, do they all get to leave with me?"
Monokuma ponders this. "Hmmm…I guess encouraging you to complicate your relationships might be interesting. Could make for good TV." Monokuma says this like an offhand comment, something that could be taken as an empty quip if Kokichi wasn't already suspicious of the implications. "Okay, knock yourself out! Good luck getting multiple people to tolerate your awful personality!"
Beside Kokichi, Kaito has a thoughtful look on his face. He's been wearing the look ever since Kokichi started talking, but now there's a tentative confidence to it.
"I never knew there was a word for that before…but y'know what, I might be like that too. Polyamorous, I mean."
"What?!" Monokuma yells, not seeming to enjoy this turn of events very much. Kokichi ignores him and turns to smile at Kaito, hoping it doesn't come across too genuine.
"Wow! That's great, I feel soooooo much more comfortable! So you don't mind if I see other people?"
"No, that doesn't bother me. And you…don't mind either, if I also date someone else?"
"Nope!" Kokichi grins, grabbing Kaito's hand and squeezing it. "Just be sure to spend time with me too, okay?"
—
The next day, Kaito gets Maki to accept his date ticket.
Shuichi agrees to start seeing Kokichi, and pretty soon convinces the pianist to date him as well. Kokichi thinks it'd be pretty easy to make Miu his bitch, but before he can even target her Kaede beats him to the punch.
Kokichi goes for Rantaro next, aiming for people who might not acquire a match without intervention. The mysterious amnesiac catches on as quickly as the others had, and soon enough starts playing the field on his own.
"Isn't it nice how so many of us are finding love?" Kokichi asks, snuggling into Kaito's side. Their second date is in the AV room, some action flick with too many explosions playing in the background. They're both too absorbed in their own self satisfaction to even pretend to watch it, but later Kokichi will bawl his eyes out when Kaito can't say what he thinks of the ending.
"Yeah, it is. I didn't know it was okay to love more than one person before, so I'm really grateful you taught me that."
"I'm just glad it’s all working out so well." Kokichi practically climbs into Kaito's lap to loop his arms around the astronaut's neck, just to get them closer. "I reaaaaally like you, Kaito. I can't wait to leave this dump and finally meet your grandparents! And I want to introduce myself to Shuichi's family, too, and Rantaro's sisters!"
"Makiroll is gonna be so excited to see all the kids at the orphanage again." Kaito turns to press his face against the top of Kokichi's head, burying a small laugh in his hair. "I hope I'll get to be by her side when it happens."
"Of course you will! After all, we'll all be getting out of here together!"
—
"How can all of you be polyamorous!?"
"I know, right?" Kokichi does his best to fight his smile down, carefully inspecting each of his nails. "What a coincidence."
"I have drawn a diagram of the polycule if you would like to verify it," Keebo volunteers, holding up a piece of paper with their complicated relationship map. "But we are all in fact dating, as you requested!"
Monokuma snatches the paper out of his hands before ripping it apart with his claws. "Where's the drama? Where's the infighting? Where are the love triangles?"
"Ooh, Gonta knows where a love triangle is!" Picking up one of the scraps of paper, Gonta grins down at it before displaying the section proudly. "See, here's Gonta, who is dating—"
"I know who you're dating, we have cameras!!" Monokuma swipes at the bit of paper again, slicing it into even smaller pieces. "But it's too perfect! Even poly people experience jealousy, you know!! I looked it up!"
"We all just happened to be very skilled communicators," Rantaro says with a smile, just a little too casual to fully qualify as smug. "Sorry if that isn't entertaining."
“Yeah, this game has become sooooooo boring now that we’re all paired up and happy.” Kokichi folds his hand behind his head, swaying from side to side. “Can we go home now? This place has gotten kinda dull, I need more date spots to take my harem.”
Said harem shoot him various scowls and looks of scandal. Monokuma doesn’t fail to notice.
“What do you guys even see in this guy? You can’t all actually like him.”
“Are you doubting the sanctity of our heartfelt bonds??” Kokichi’s eyes shine with righteous anger and sudden tears. “I’m not leaving unless all my boyfriends come with me!”
“And my girlfriend,” says Shuichi.
“And my girlfriend,” adds Kaede.
“And my—”
“Shut up!!” Monokuma roars, throwing his paws up. “Shut up shut up shut up! Just graduate and get out of my fur, you little deviants!”
Kokichi feels his feet lift off the ground as five Exisals appear out of nowhere to scoop them up. All of the robots immediately start jogging (which Kokichi did not realize non-Keebo robots could do) with the Ultimates crowded in their metal arms, shouting about how they’d “remove these kids right away for you, father!”.
Squeezed up against his classmates, Kokichi allows himself the grin he’s been desperately holding back all this time. He can’t stop the laugh that jumps out of him either, cackling and triumphant, and can only hope that the heavy footfalls of the Exisals cover up the sound.