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How bad could the day get.
That Friday was never meant to be a good day. The rain from the very early morning was a sign from the Gods that there will be disgrace. There will be pain and loss. He should've heard their warning, then maybe they would've survived.
A guildie had lost their lives during the fight.
He had tried everything humanly possible to fight back and make sure no one was in deep danger. The rogue couldn't afford not even for a second to get distracted during the heated fight. It could cost his life or worse, his guild member's life. And somehow, for some punishment of the heavens, one of them died, before his very eyes.
The desperation. The screams of horror. The cold and sharp strike of reality. He had let someone under his wing get killed by the enemy.
Shoto snapped.
Vicious swings and merciless strikes.
Drenched in a ocean of red and perfumed by the smell of iron. He did not remember when was the last time he had felt so sickly sticky, with adrenaline running dangerously high on his veins. Senses were sharper and suddenly he couldn't hear anymore. Tracking every minimal movement and charging without a thought. He was fast, incredibly fast. His knife suddenly becoming the deadliest thing that could be held by a man's hand. The rogue did not realize that he had massacred all of the demons without his other guild members even moving a limb. They all had gotten into a shock state, for both their dead colleague and for their guild leader who suddenly went feral. They knew their guild leader was not a weak man. But the power and danger he held was concerning and terrifying enough to make them hesitate to move.
However, one of the guild members stepped up, going closer to their leader besides the protest and warnings. In that exact moment they thanked the gods for being physically strong with reflexes. Because the next second the same leader had charged towards them with a powerful swing that was stopped mid way. They held into their leader's arms and looked them straight into his bright and lifeless indigo eyes. – “ SHOTO, SNAP OUT! ” – they yelled, it was a clear order and had the same intensity as the man's eyes. They kept struggling in going against his strength, but never giving in. Staring into each other's eyes while waiting patiently.
Then, Shoto felt a drop. Two drops. Three...then many were falling on him at a rapid speed. He could feel the rain. He could hear it. His strength slowly subsiding as he stepped back. It was raining really heavily, the fog growing much more. His neutral expression stared on those infront of him. All os his guild members looked at him with worry. Then he saw the guildie that was lifeless in one of it's colleagues arms. He wasn't sure if it was the rain, but he felt a warm drop leave both his eyes, even if his entire body was cold. The rogue could only mutter in a weak voice.
– “ I'm sorry.... ”
He entered home from the back door.
It was late into the night, Kyren and Tadashi probably already asleep. It was better if they didn't see him like this. However, he knew better. They were demons, their senses were outrageously higher than his, so if they didn't hear him enter, the bothersome and strong smell of blood would.
Said children, peaked from their shared room looking at the looming figure of their parent as he enters his room closing the door. It was dark and they had just woken up, so they couldn't exactly see how he was bathing in blood, but they could feel the strong and uncomfortable smell from him. They were about to call their father when spotting the same reaching towards them. Haku, an adult demon and caretaker of the two demon children. He kneeled infront of them and ruffled their hair. – “ Go back to sleep.. I'll talk with him. ” – he also had noticed -clearly- the footsteps and the blood drenched air that followed it.
As soon they went inside, he turned to headed towards the slayer's room. Haku was honest, he was worried when he felt the strong smell of iron, and almost sprinted towards the back, but realized it was demonic blood and not humans. There was a faint human scent, but it was incredibly overpowered by the demonic one. It was concerning even. Opening the door, since the male never locks it, he hears the shower running from the bathroom, so he takes a seat at the edge of the bed.
With Shoto, he was aggressively rubbing his skin, washing out every tint of red that he saw in himself. He felt gross. Disgusted by the blood of those ill intended demons. He wanted nothing but to get rid of the smell and the haunting colour. He's sure he'll be having trigger problems when seeing the colour for a day or so. But it didn't matter now. It was already done. They were already dead by his hands....just like that guildie was dead by theirs.
Tears prickle in the corner of his eyes. His movements becoming more aggressive, almost if wanting to tear his own skin off. He failed them. So. So badly. He had promised them that nothing bad would happen. That as their guild leader, he would protect them from major danger, and for the first time, he failed. – “ I can't get weak now....this cannot repeat again.. ” – he told himself. Finishing with his shower, satisfied with the clean body and smell, he wore more comfortable clothes and went out the bathroom. Then, he saw Haku.
– “ Hey... ” – he gives the man a small smile, still standing at the bathroom door. The demon looked at him and gestured for him to walk in his direction.
The rogue obeyed and slowly walked towards him. He didn't feel like lying, even if he could. Haku though he was going to sit next to him, but is surprised (read amused) to see the man climb on his lap, legs on each of his sides and head on his shoulder clinging onto him. However, he didn't complain, wrapping his arms around his waist and back. – “ I'm glad you came home unharmed. ” – he started off.
Shoto smiled slightly against his shirt, nuzzling deeper into his shoulder. They weren't exactly dating, this was one of the rare moments were they were really intimate. But to be fair, he just wanted a bit of comfort and safety. And the demon just happens to be really good at it.
The slayer was glad his body wasn't reacting bad to him. It recognized that the demons in his house meant no harm, but warmth... much, that Shoto could feel himself physically relax completely in his arms. – “ I'm sorry for waking up the kids...I know they heard and felt the smell... ”
– “ They were worried. To suddenly feeling a strong smell of blood and knowing that only you weren't home woke them up to see you. ” – the hand on his back went up and down in a slowly pace. – “ Thankfully it wasn't your blood... ” – his voice went to barely a whisper. Shoto could tell the demon was also worried from the fact he came back smelling terribly of blood.
– “ I...lost control...when I noticed I had...killed about... 11 of them... ” – his voice went lower and lower to a mumble. His grip around the taller's neck becoming tighter. – “ Do you want to talk about it? ”
Personally, he didn't want to answer the question. Shoto was never afraid to admit his mistakes and bring his flaws forward..but he simply couldn't keep his cool if he admitted he let someone die under his wing. Burying his face on the demon's neck he stayed there silent. Haku took it : as a topic that the man's simply was not comfortable at all talking, until he heard the man mumble something under his breath. – “ What was that? ”
– “ A guildie died during the mission....”
The slow rubs stopped for a second. A person who was under his "housemate's" care had died. His grip around the slayer tighten and he felt his neck and shoulder began to soak. – “ I'm sorry... ” – he whispered as a console. Haku knew Shoto for a few years now, he was aware of how important his guild members were to him, and how protective he was of them. For a young soul to die on a mission where he also happened to go, was taking a painful tool on him. He immediately guessed that the man lost the last string of self-control he had, and just simply slaughtered every demon present, it was an inhumane act but as a non-human himself it was understandable. If anything, he would've probably reacted the same way.
He nuzzles on the mans shoulder and let's him sob as much as he wanted. Words weren't going to do much more then actions, so he just kept silent and offered as much physical proximity possible. They held each other for what looked like half an hour, none really saying anything, just quiet sobs being heard. Eventually, Shoto ran out of tears, slowly lifting his head making Haku also lift his and look into his eyes. The once confident and excited indigo eyes, now puffy and lifeless. The slayer took the back of his arm to clean his face. – “ I'm so-rry... ”
– “ Don't apologize, you needed it... ” – the man also rubbed his cheeks cleaning the last fallen tear. – “ I failed them Haku... ”
– “ You didn't. ”
– “ I did! I- ”
– “ Shoto you can't protect everyone. ” – he made his voice as soft as possible for the harsh truth. – “ Your people know the danger they are putting themselves in, when working on that guild. You know better than anyone else the dangers that those missions possess. ” – the hands on his shirt tighten their grip. – “ It happens my love.... it's okay to want to protect them...but lives will be lost with time...you yourself have almost lost yours countless times.. ” – it was his time to tighten his hold on the rogue. – “ Those demons are at fault for taking that innocent life. You did all you could to make sure everyone was safe and that's enough... ” – Haku ended up resting his forehead on the other's shoulder. – “ And I'm sure that the guildies understand that...not everything is within our power... ”
There was silence. Shoto didn't know what to respond, because he knew what the demon was saying is the truth. For as much he tries, there's no guarantee he'll be able to protect everyone. It was still a hard and sharp thing he was still trying to swallow. His guild was well known, giving them more activity, but also being really visible to the enemy's eyes. Many guildies, including himself are subject of danger and possible death everytime that they are in their work uniform. And yet, stayed beside him and work with him...even if their lives are at risk. – “ I'm sure you noticed by now that they're by your side despite all of it...so was the little one that has fallen. ” – he felt the other slowly lift up and look into his eyes. – “ And now as their leader, you should also be there for them. And collectively move along together.. ”
For the first time in that day he smiled genuinely. It was ironic he needed a demon, the same creature he absolutely massacred earlier, to knock some sense into his brain. Perhaps he already knew what he had to do, but was blinded and deafen by the self-criticism and sudden reality. He hugged him again, stronger and grateful. The demon chuckled lowly rubbing his back again. – “ Thanks buddy...needed that call... We'll give them a proper burial tomorrow and I'll stay at the guild for the day.. ” – slowly, the rogue got up getting off Haku's lap, thinking his legs might've start hurting. He slowly climbed onto the bed going under the covers. Tomorrow was going to be a long day, and he needed to rest as much possible, but of course, he had to pat the other side of the bed inviting the other. The room was theirs to share, but a lot of times one or the other would sleep at the couch or on some occasions, with the other kids.
Haku laughed a bit at the invitation, also crawling his way up the bed. He went under the covers both heard the door opened. – “ Dad...can we sleep with you guys?... ” – It was Tadashi, and behind stood Kyren yawning a bit. Shoto smiled at the sight of the two, lifting the covers. – “ C'me here.. ” – the younger ones eagerly went towards the bed climbing until they were on the middle. Kyren hugged the slayer, while Tadashi rested his back against Haku's chest. In sink, both adults kissed the crown of the children's head, earning a giggle from them. Shoto was sure enough, that it doesn't matter how much demons had ruined his life in the past, he can't find himself hating or resenting the demons on the bed. Holding one of them close, he closes his eyes, peacefully drifting to sleep in the comfort of his new family.
The next day, all the guild was present for the funeral. Haku, Tadashi and Kyren watching from afar. Just like he said, Shoto stayed at the guild, being there and comforting all of those who needed. He didn't let anyone lose hope. Even with the dangers, he wanted his guildies to still be able to be happy despite the dangerous around.
And he was determined to let them be happy.