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Regulus figured out his brother became an Animagus rather quickly. He figured it out before the process was even complete.
Peter Pettigrew, James Potter, and Sirius Black shutting up for a whole month?
Miracles such as this do not exist.
All he had to do was use Miss Pince’s adoration of him to figure out what kind of books the three menaces took from the library. (She really doesn’t adore anything that isn’t a book, but Regulus always makes an effort to maintain her system and even puts books that were put in the wrong place into the correct one. Yes, Miss Pince loves him)
The three boys were incredibly young to become animagi, they managed it at the end of the fifth year, so they were between fifteen and sixteen. Regulus thinks they would have been the youngest to have ever accomplished this.
They would have been – if Regulus Black wasn’t an ambitious and petty little shit who would not be bested by his brother in anything.
Regulus Black became an Animagus soon after the Marauders, being almost half a year younger than their youngest (James) he was still younger than them when he accomplished it.
He is still waiting for the right moment to reveal this little triumph.
He is now sixteen, at the end of his fifth year, while the boys are in their sixth year.
In the meantime, he used his new skill to venture through the castle unseen. He knows Sirius is a dog because of course he is. He doesn’t know about the other two blokes – and he has his theories about why Lupin didn’t become an Animagus – but while cats are allowed to have as pets at Hogwarts, dogs aren’t. So as a rather small, black cat, Regulus can move through the castle without anyone raising an eyebrow at him.
He is very familiar with the other common rooms now. He likes the Ravenclaw common room best, but maybe just because Pandora is there. Pandora is the only one he lets hold him voluntarily. She has given him a tiny blue collar with a dangling silver star on it. Regulus wears it dutifully in his cat form. If he’s honest, he thinks he looks adorable in it.
He sometimes also ventures into the Gryffindor common room to visit his brother. Now, the Gryffindors are horrible. They all find him cute and try to pick him up or pet him at any given moment. He has bitten and clawed at each of them multiple times.
Today, he goes to visit Sirius again. Supper is already over, and he spots Sirius and his friends on the sofas around the fireplace. He immediately walks over to them to annoy him.
Sirius doesn’t like cats.
Sirius fucking hates cats and he is allergic to them.
This little circumstance makes Regulus love his Animagus form even more. Every time he jumps on the sofa, Sirius jumps up from it like he’s about to claw his eyes out – which is a fair assumption, ask Lily.
“Get that thing away from me,” Sirius cries out and jumps into Remus’ lap on a separate armchair.
Regulus is sitting in Sirius’ former place now just looking at him.
“It’s just a cat,” James rolls his eyes, “Hey, it’s Black Claw. Good to see you back, buddy.”
Black Claw – why do Gryffindors have to nickname everything?
James reaches out for him and scratches behind his ears.
“James, be careful, you don’t want to end up like Marlene the other day,” Remus says lazily, balancing his dramatic boyfriend and a book in his lap.
“Oh, he never scratches me. Right little one? You’re so cute.”
It’s true. He never scratches James. James is also the only Gryffindor in here who is allowed to pick him up and cuddle him.
Why?
Well, Regulus wishes there was a mean and petty reason behind it but really, James is just fucking hot. He’s so fit, he’s clever, his face is fucking perfect – his glasses? His glasses! Regulus has worshipped this boy for years. He has also hated him for years.
James Potter, the worst Potter in history as far as Regulus is concerned, the stupid, silly best friend of his idiot brother went home after his fourth year and came back for his fifth year looking like he fell out of Witch’s Weekly. It’s unfair. Just simply unfair.
Regulus being Regulus would of course not let anyone know of this lapse in judgement. Last of all James and Sirius. So, he watches from afar. He tries not to have a heart attack when he sees him play Quidditch and tries not to cry when he sees him laugh.
Life’s unfair. It’s pretty fucking unfair. But what can you do?
What can you do?
Well, you could turn into a cat, sneak into James’ common room and let him cuddle you as much as wants. That’s what you could do.
It is almost too embarrassing how James coos at him and calls him silly names, but hey, his hands are on him, so what is a little internal embarrassment, really?
Peter comes from somewhere and drops himself on the sofa next to Regulus.
“Oh, the cat is back,” he exclaims and promptly tries to pick him up.
“Pete, please, I will die if you keep playing with that thing,” Sirius complains and suppresses a sneeze. He rubs at his reddened eyes.
“Oh, shit,” Remus mumbles, “Alright, Pads, let’s go upstairs, away from the devil cat.”
“Stupid cats,” Sirius mutters while blindly letting his boyfriend lead him upstairs.
In the meantime, Regulus is fighting Peter. He reaches for him with his claws and tries to wind himself out of his arms.
“Be careful, Pete,” James laughs, “he doesn’t like that.”
“Come on, Black Claw, I just want to cuddle with you. I’m nice, I swear. I’ll give you some treats even.”
Regulus hisses at him and pushes his paws against Peter’s hand.
“Alright, that’s enough,” James says with a grin, “Don’t torture him. Come here.”
James reaches over and plucks Regulus right out of Peter’s arms. Regulus calms down instantly and rubs his head against James’ hand.
“That’s just unfair,” Peter comments, “Why is he nice to you?”
“I’m his favourite, simple as that,” James shrugs, “He loves me more than all you.”
Oh, he does. He really does.
Regulus settles in James’ lap while James and Peter start talking about nonsense. He falls asleep there for a while.
Regulus sneaks into the Gryffindor common room again a few days later – to annoy Sirius again, of course. He just catches the last glimpse of James leaving for the Boys’ dorms. Regulus quickly follows him.
He slips into the dorm room behind James.
“Hey, Sirius still in detention?”
“Yes. I’ll pick him up later,” Remus says from his bed.
James sighs and throws himself on his bed, blindly reaching for his glasses and setting them aside on the bedside table. Regulus jumps on the bed after him. James smiles when he sees him and rubs his hand along the side of his face.
“How did you find your way up here, huh?” James mumbles, “I wish we could keep you.”
“Sirius would die,” Remus reminds him.
Win-Win situation – Regulus thinks.
“Are you alright, Prongs?” Peter asks, he is also in Remus’ bed for some reason.
James sighs and pets Regulus, who is lying on his chest at this point.
“What did Lily reject you again?”
James clicks his tongue. “No. How often do I have to tell you: I’m over Lily. I’m not interested in her anymore.”
“Yes, we remember,” Remus says, “I for my part just like to ignore that you’re newly infatuated with my boyfriend’s little brother.”
Regulus’ head snaps up. What? Are they talking about him? Are they taking the piss? Have they figured out he’s here?
James sits up, carefully balancing the cat in his arms. “Fuck off. … I can’t help it. He’s so beautiful.”
Regulus briefly wonders what happens if he has a heart attack in his cat form. Did James Potter just call him beautiful? Him?
As far as Regulus knows, James isn’t even interested in men.
“He can be beautiful all he wants. He’s your best friend’s baby brother and you will stay away from him,” Remus insists.
“It’s just – he’s funny. He’s mean and funny and cute – and he is so beautiful. I could love him so well. You have no idea. I could get him out of that stupid house away from his stupid parents and love him so well.”
“You need therapy,” Remus says flatly, “Or a lobotomy whatever works faster.”
“Lobotomy,” Peter provides, helpfully.
“If – just if – you make a move on Regulus, Sirius would lose his mind. He would hunt you down and then he would hunt his brother down. It will be ugly and bloody and dramatic - and frankly, I’m not in the mood for it. So, get it together and move on.”
Oh, shut up, Lupin – Regulus hisses in his head, and maybe the cat actually hisses in Remus’ direction. If James wants to love him, then he bloody well can, thank you very much.
“I don’t get it,” Peter asks, “Have you ever actually spoken to him?”
“Of course, I have. Several times. I mean, he hasn’t spoken back a lot except to call me an idiot. Most of the time he just rolls his eyes at me – but he looks so endearing when he does that.”
Regulus rolls his eyes internally.
Remus shakes his head at him. “I repeat, you make a move on him, Sirius will hunt you down. It isn’t worth it.”
“Okay, but hear me out: What if it is?”
Remus throws his head back with a groan.
Peter chuckles. “Well, what put you in a slump now, just simping over little Reggie?”
James sighs and lies back on his bed. Regulus settles on his chest again, listening attentively.
“I was looking at the map and Regulus was in the Ravenclaw common room again. He was draped over that girl – Pandora – for hours. Why does everyone I fancy fall in love with pretty girls?”
Regulus mentally stumbles over map. What map? And how does he know about Pandora?
- Most importantly though, no, he is not in love with Pandora or any girl.
“Well thank the gods for that. At least one straight Black. Now, I at least don’t have to worry about this anymore. Thank you.” Remus gets out of bed and Regulus considers jumping up and scratching him because – straight – how dare he?!
“I’m gonna pick up Sirius from detention, see you later.” Remus leaves the dorm without new scars.
Count your days, Lupin. Regulus thinks.
Soon enough, Peter leaves for Supper, James tells him he will join him in a minute.
James has his eyes closed and his head on his pillow. One of his hands is in Regulus’ fur. He looks like he is about to fall asleep. Now, when they’re finally alone.
Regulus carefully recaps the new information:
James thinks he is beautiful. James thinks he could love him. James thinks he’s cute when he’s mean to him. James thinks he is dating a girl. Remus is a twat.
Conclusion: James is mental.
Conclusion two: The boy he has been crushing on likes him back.
Conclusion three: If either of them made a move, Sirius would be annoyed as hell.
Regulus is only seeing upsides here. (Of course, if his parents found out that would be very bad, but then again that is largely due to his sexuality not James as a person… though James as a person would make it worse … and maybe that makes it even more tempting.)
The only thing Regulus would have to do is dare talk to him. He has to catch him alone, go up to him tell him he fancies him.
He cringes at the thought alone. He isn’t good at that. It would probably come out as snarky and sarcastic.
Well, in a way he is in a perfect position to do it now. He already has James in his dorm alone, he can’t hope for a better opportunity.
Regulus sighs deeply. Alright.
He shifts out of his cat form.
James startles underneath him. He stares up at him out of wide, brown eyes.
Regulus, straddling him because he didn’t bother moving down from him before shifting, looks back down at him.
James blinks rapidly.
“Regulus? What- How did you-“ Regulus can see how the pieces connect in his head. “You’re an Animagus?”
Regulus shrugs. “Couldn’t let Sirius have all the fun.”
James stares at him, then he starts laughing nervously. He rubs his face with both hands.
“Please, tell me you didn’t hear all that what we’ve just said.”
“No, I’m deaf in my cat form.”
He could swear, James is blushing.
“Oh, fuck, I’m just realising – if you’re that cat, I’ve – oh, sorry, I picked you up and cuddled you all the time. This is embarrassing.”
Regulus hums. “You did that because I let you.”
James takes his hands off his face and is looking at him curiously.
“Right, you let me. Only me.”
“Yes.”
“Because… I’m your favourite?”
“Yes.”
“And maybe also… because…” he looks away from his face and nervously drums his fingers against Regulus’ legs, “You may… perhaps… like me?”
“Perhaps,” Regulus cannot suppress the smile on his face anymore, “That depends.”
“On what?” his eyes on his face again.
Regulus leans down to him, boldly. “If you make a move on me, are you prepared to fight Sirius for me?”
James’ face pulls into a bright smile. “I’d fight him every day if you… feel the same for me.”
Regulus smiles and nods in answer. James’s smile becomes impossibly brighter. He’s so fucking bright, this boy, everything about him. Regulus wants him all to himself. He wants to know him inside and out. Sirius be fucking damned. His parents be fucking damned, too.
James puts his hands on Regulus’ hips and pulls him closer. Regulus leans down to him, bracing himself on James’ pillow. He smirks down at him, wondering how long it will take James to just do it and kiss him. Yes, it will piss Sirius off, but it will be worth it.
James is looking at him like he is a piece of art, like looking is enough.
It isn’t enough for Regulus, and he has waited long enough – also, if he makes the move on James, Sirius can’t be too angry with him. He licks his lips. James’ eyes widen slightly, which makes him smirk even more.
Finally, Regulus closes the space between them and kisses him. It’s an innocent kiss, experimental. Just a test of what it feels like – it feels fucking fantastic. It feels like everything Regulus has dreamed of.
It feels warm like the summer sun.
Regulus pulls back, and James pushes himself up on his elbows and connects their lips again. Regulus smiles against his lips and kisses him back, pushing him back down on the pillow.
Regulus shifts his weight on him and pushes one hand up into James’ messy hair. James’ hands slide up his back, giving him goosebumps all over until he can cup his cheek and stroke over his face, and wrap black curls around his fingers.
James is touching him like looking wasn’t enough, never has been enough and never will be enough again.
He kisses him the same way. He kisses him like he has been wanting to do it for a long time. He kisses him in a way that makes Regulus believe he’d fight Sirius with his bare hands.
James’ hand is stroking his cheek, the other is roaming over his back, grabbing a piece of his jumper, holding on to it.
Regulus rakes his fingers through James’ messy hair, lightly pulling on the roots. He is so warm. He is like a furnace. Regulus would let him burn him and thank him.
He smells fantastic, tastes amazing, Regulus could obsess over simple things like the rhythm in which he breathes and how he can feel his heartbeat quicken when he presses his hand against his chest.
When Regulus finally pulls away, panting, James keeps coming back up, stealing tiny kisses, though he is out of breath just as much.
James leans his head back on the pillow looking up at him, his hand still on his cheek. He is smiling and running his thumb along his bottom lip.
He chuckles nervously again, his entire face flushed bright red. “So, … would you like to go out with me?”
Gods, this boy. This silly, stupid, hot boy. Regulus laughs lightly, letting it deliberately spread over his entire face, while James watches him.
“Yes, I’ll go out with you.”
“Good. Good, yeah, great,” James laughs too and pulls him in to kiss him again.
They decide to go down to supper eventually before their friends start to get worried.
“So, just for the record, you’re not dating that girl, right?” James asks when Regulus smooths out his hair in front of his mirror.
“Pandora? No, she’s a friend.”
“Good. Then I don’t have to be jealous.”
“You don’t have to be. But she is the only other person I allow to pick me up as a cat. Do with that what you want.”
James gasps. “That’s treason. High treason. Cheating.”
Reggie chuckles and bites his lip. “Cheating?”
“Yes. I should be the only one who gets to do that. I thought I was special.”
Regulus turns to him. James has pulled his clothes straight again and put his glasses back on his nose. Regulus reaches out, playing with the Gryffindor tie.
“You are special.”
James almost blushes again. He pulls him in and kisses him. He could spend his entire life like this, thank you very much.
James pulls back again. “Okay, we really need to go – if we keep doing this we will miss dinner.” He looks at his lips and seems to be changing his mind already. Regulus presses a chaste kiss on his lips and then winds himself out of his arms.
“Just one moment. That over there is Sirius’ bed right?” Regulus asks.
James nods confusedly. Regulus shifts back into the cat form and then jumps on his brother’s bed. He rolls around on the pillow and the blanket, making sure to lose a few hairs everywhere.
James is laughing openly.
“Regulus, you’re gonna kill him. Alright, that’s enough, come you little menace.”
Regulus jumps down from the bed again and James opens the door for them. He shifts back as soon as they got some paces away from the Gryffindor common room.
***
That following Saturday, James takes Regulus to the Three Broomsticks.
“Where are your obnoxious friends? Or do you want to risk fighting Sirius right here?” Regulus asks after James orders their drinks.
“Uhm, Moony didn’t feel good. Sirius stayed with him of course. Peter… I have bribed Peter. So, they certainly won’t disturb us. We’ll see what happens if some of the other Gryffindors try to sit with us.”
“I could scratch them,” Regulus offers.
“I think that should be our absolute last option.” James says but smirks.
Regulus smiles. He can still barely believe he is sitting here on a date with James Potter. The boy he has hated for years then loved for years. His twelve-year-old self would be appalled, his fourteen-year-old self would be the happiest person alive.
James has an elbow propped up on the table, holding his head in his hand. He is looking at him with a smile.
“Have I told you already how beautiful you are? You’re so beautiful.”
Regulus bites his lip and looks away from him.
“Are you blushing?” James asks with a grin, “No way. Mean, feisty Regulus Black is blushing because of me. I’m the luckiest man alive.”
Regulus rolls his eyes.
“I made you blush, too. Don’t forget that. Mr Super Star Chaser. Your cocky arse is strutting through the castle like you own it and can have any girl you look at, yet I made you blush.”
“Is that what you think of me?”
“I think a lot of things of you.”
He leans further over the table. “Such as?”
Regulus smirks. “I think you’re silly with your silly little pranks.”
“They’re not silly, they’re genius.”
“Evidence suggests you’re also delusional.”
James chuckles.
“I also think you’re stupid. I know you’re quite successful academically, but you just have stupid vibes. Like some stranger would offer to show you puppies and you’d follow them in a heartbeat.”
“I have more a thing for cats than for puppies.”
Regulus smiles. Now he leans closer. “I also think you’re funny.”
“Do you?”
“Yes. If you tell anyone I will deny it.”
“Of course.”
“Of course,” Regulus nods. “And I think you’re kind, selfless… and fucking hot.”
James’ dopey grin quickly turns into laughter. He hides his face in his head like a child and looks at him through his fingers. He’s so cute, too. Regulus’ heart wants to burst.
“You know I thought you hated me,” James admits, putting his hands down, his cheeks are red again.
Regulus hums. “I did. Well, kind of. I was jealous.”
“Of whom?”
“Of you. … Of your relationship with Sirius. At the start of every holiday, I was anxious he… wouldn’t come home with me but leave with you instead.”
James looks at him surprised. Regulus wants to curse himself. This isn’t the right topic for a date. Especially not a first date. He’s so bloody bad at this.
“Sirius would never leave you in that house,” James says firmly – and this time, Regulus is the surprised one. “I’ve begged him to come all the time. He wouldn’t leave you behind. He’d never do that, you’re his world. I wouldn’t want him to, either. I’d gladly have both of you living with me.”
Regulus takes a sip from his butterbeer, so he doesn’t have to look at him.
“We shouldn’t talk about stuff like that,” he decides.
“Okay. Tell me something else. Something good.”
“Like?”
“Like… why did you become an Animagus?”
Regulus smirks. “Because I’m petty. I found out that Sirius was doing it and I wouldn’t let your group be the youngest wizards to have ever accomplished it. I’d never let him accomplish something like that without even trying to beat him.”
James is laughing again. He looks gorgeous when he laughs.
“And guess what, I made it. I was fifteen and three months old when I managed it, you were fifteen and nine months old.”
James is shaking his head. “You’re fucking brilliant.”
“I know. Why did you do it?”
James looks away briefly and drinks from his beer. “Would you believe me if I said it was for a dare in a game?”
“I would actually. Sounds like something your group would do.”
James grins. “You really think we’re stupid.”
“Yes. I really do.” He leans in closer again. “But I tell you a secret: I kind of like it. You’re very clever and talented but you can also be so stupid – it’s funny. I like that.”
“Tell me one stupid thing you’ve actually seen me do,” James challenges him – and oh, he shouldn’t have because Regulus has a list.
“First: your second year, you tried to impress Lily Evans with a dance on the table, stepped into the mashed potatoes, slipped, fell, knocked out a tooth and then kept dancing pretending nothing has happened.”
James chuckles at the memory. “Okay, listen, that wasn’t stupid, that was totally planned.”
“Then that plan was stupid. Two: When you tried out for your Quidditch team that year, you knew you didn’t have a chance against your fifth-year competition so you tried manipulating their brooms, but accidentally hexed your own and had to spend a week in the hospital wing afterwards. Three: You kept wearing your glasses upside down for an entire week in the beginning of third year because you thought it looked cool. Which brings me to four: You spent the next week not wearing your glasses at all because you thought it looked even cooler and you kept running into students, walls, stairs, teachers, desks, chairs and kept spreading your dinner over the entire table. It was hilarious.”
James messes up his hair. “Lily said they looked stupid.”
“She’s wrong. I like them on you. Also, without them you’re blind, James, why would you ever take them off for some girl?”
James shows him a lopsided grin. “Maybe I am stupid.” He winks at him.
Regulus nods. “Like the first quidditch game of the season, after the summer holidays. You won against my team – which is a miracle – and you insisted on doing a stupid little dance on your broom until you fell off.”
“I did that to make you laugh,” he says softly.
And Regulus might blush again. “It made me laugh.”
“I know. It was beautiful.”
“Worth the concussion you got?”
“Yes. Definitely.”
Regulus shakes his head. “So stupid,” he whispers, “It might become my favourite thing about you.”
James smiles. “You forgot one very stupid thing I did.”
“Well, I wasn’t done. There is a list, James. It’s twenty-nine things. There is even a rating system. … I have a lot of time.”
“Sure. Why isn’t that surprising to me? Anyway, one very stupid thing I’ve done: I have a magic map that shows the location of every student - where they are and what they are doing. And yet, I never noticed you being that cat. I noticed you being in other common rooms. I noticed very much how often your name tag was on top of Pandora. I never noticed you in our vicinity. And then I confessed my feelings with you in the room – although I have that one tool, that allows me to see whether you’re in the bloody room.”
Regulus chuckles. “A magic map?”
“Yes, we made it,” James says, only bragging a little bit.
“See, exactly what I mean: Incredibly gifted, talented, clever. But too stupid to use it properly. Well, it’s my luck, isn’t it?”
“It’s my luck for sure.”
Regulus leans his head back and smiles at him. “Now, tell me everything I need to know about you. I’ve watched you from afar long enough. Tell me everything from favourite childhood memory to favourite colour.”
James smiles brightly. “Watched me for long enough… since when?”
“Since when I’ve watched you? Since the first moment we’ve met. My reasons shifted over the years.”
“When did they shift to the good reasons?”
Regulus shrugs. “It was a slow process, you did a lot of stupid and funny things in between. I became aware of the good reasons… your fifth year, my fourth? It was the beginning of the term, I think, somewhere after summer, probably around Halloween.”
James’ smile is so fucking warm as if the sun is living on his face. “I stopped thinking of you as just Sirius’ little brother in that year, too. Though at the end of it. Somewhere around or after your 15th birthday – you remember, Sirius and I and Remus and Peter bought you and your friends butterbeers all afternoon and played stupid games you hated. I think, I started liking you the way I do now after that summer. Beginning of this school year. I stopped chasing Lily, and I didn’t look for anything else, anyone new to adore… but there you were. We were being silly outside. I gave Sirius my glasses and you came along, not even stopping just saying ‘put your glasses back on, Potter, you look stupid’ – so I put the glasses back on and you said-“
“An improvement. Probably as good as it gets,” Regulus provides.
James smiles. “Yes. You’re fucking mean. But I looked at you and all I could think was – he’s so beautiful, I’d do anything he said. I think you rolled your eyes at me because of something and it was so endearing. I couldn’t stop looking at you. I don’t think I want to ever stop looking at you.”
Regulus smiles back. “Then don’t.”
And then James smiles brightly and starts telling Regulus everything he wants to know about him, from childhood memories to his favourite colour.
***
Regulus knows he has to keep his relationship with James a secret from his parents and anyone who has ties to his parents. He doesn’t really try keeping it a secret from James’ friends. He gets into their common room or James’ dorm as the cat, usually. But once he and James are alone, snogging in the dorm or some corridor, he hardly cares who stumbles upon them.
James is slightly more paranoid about being found out by Sirius. Sure, he would fight Sirius for him, but he doesn’t think they have to put poor Remus through this drama sooner than necessary.
They’re about five weeks into this now. The end of the term and the start of the summer holidays is mercilessly coming nearer (so are Regulus’ OWLs but he doesn’t worry much about them if he’s honest)
Regulus slips into the Gryffindor common room with some careless first years, of course in his cat form. He jumps on Sirius as soon as he sees him, clawing at his trousers.
Sirius gives a high-pitched shout and jumps up. “Take it off! Take it off! Take it off!”
James laughs and plucks Regulus from where he has buried his claws into Sirius’ leg.
“Bad cat, don’t do that, you’re hurting him,” James says, not able to suppress his laugh. He kisses Regulus’ head. He does that all the time – no matter if human or cat.
“I hate that thing,” Sirius complains, “How is it getting in here? You, over there, did you let the cat in?”
He is pointing at the poor first-years. James turns to them and smiles.
“It’s alright. He’s just being dramatic. The cat is allowed to be here.”
“No, it’s not allowed to be here. It’s trying to kill me, James. I can see it in its eyes.”
James holds Regulus up in front of his face to look into his eyes. He smiles.
“Doesn’t scream assassin to me, to be honest.” James puts Regulus in his lap. “Hey, why don’t you go to the kitchen already, get what we need. I’ll just finish this essay and join you then. We launch the attack at midnight, I’ll be there at nine, latest.”
“Nine? It’s seven,” Remus remarks.
“I worked slower than you, I know. I’ll meet you there, I’ll go up to the dorm so I can concentrate better.”
“James, I swear, if you let that cat into my bed one more time, I will murder you,” Sirius hisses.
“Don’t worry, I’ll keep him out of the dorm, promise.”
“Good. Moony and I will go… somewhere and meet you in the kitchen at nine.” Sirius grabs his boyfriend’s hand.
“And what about me?” Peter asks.
“Help James with his essay or play perv while I shag my boyfriend, your choice.”
Peter frowns and looks at James, who smiles at him. He turns to Marlene, Dorcas, Lily, and Mary sitting on the sofa across from them.
“Girls, what are you doing?”
“Gossip and nails,” Lily says.
“And shit-talking men,” Marlene adds.
“Can I join?”
“Sure, Pete,” Mary smiles and they make space for him between her and Marlene.
“So, men are fucking awful, am I right?” Peter says immediately upon sitting down, “Especially those two blokes called Sirius and Remus? I mean, really? Have you heard of a room? Fucking get one.”
The girls laugh and agree with them. Sirius and Remus leave while flipping them off.
James quickly gathers Regulus in his arms, takes his books and his essay and goes up to his dorm.
He sets the papers down on his nightstand. When he is holding Regulus in both arms, he decides to shift before he sat him down. James, not expecting this though he does it often enough, yelps and falls to the ground with Regulus sitting on his hips.
“Reggie!” James laughs, lying on the floor with his boyfriend above him.
Regulus puts his entire weight on him and kisses him on the floor. James makes a content sound against his lips and wraps his arms around him.
They do move to the bed eventually because James complains about lying on the edge of a rug.
Regulus is lying under James this time. He has his legs wrapped around James, whose hands just slipped under his shirt. He started getting bolder recently, touching his bare skin, even taking off his shirt once.
Regulus knows they won’t do anything tonight, not with James having plans later on. He is okay with that – well, okay is an overstatement. But he can deal with it. Begrudgingly.
James’ lips wander down Regulus’ neck. Regulus leans his head to the side, baring his throat to him to do whatever he wants. His fingers are curled in his messy hair.
James sucks lightly on his neck. Regulus huffs a quiet moan. James tightens his hand around Regulus’ waist and pushes his body down on his.
Maybe he is getting lucky tonight after all.
James lets go of his neck and grins at him before kissing his lips again. Regulus moves his lips against his. He lets their tongues slide together. James makes a little noise against him that Regulus is just in love with.
Suddenly, the door is thrown open so hard, it bangs harshly against the wall behind it.
“JAMES FLEAMONT POTTER GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY BROTHER!”
James flinches away from Regulus so harshly, he loses his balance and falls off the bed. Regulus sits up quickly and looks at him on the ground.
“Are you okay?”
James rubs his head. A look of absolute panic sits on his face.
Regulus is dragged out of bed a second later, Sirius pulling on his arm.
“Get out of there. What the fuck are you doing here, Reggie?”
Regulus turns to him. Sirius is furiously looking him up and down. Remus stands at the door with a map in his hands and a concerned look on his face.
“Is that a fucking hickey,” Sirius exclaims now, having pushed back Regulus' hair, “James, you’re fucking dead!”
Regulus winds his arm out of Sirius’ grip with an eyeroll. James emerges from behind his bed slowly.
“Sirius, please, calm down. It’s not – I didn’t – I’m sorry.”
Regulus reaches for James’ glasses and hands them to him, then takes a look at the watch lying on his nightstand.
“Not even half an hour. Now I’m just sad for the both of you,” Regulus says looking from Remus to Sirius.
“Shut your mouth. Better tell me what that mouth was doing on him.”
“Kissing him? Are you really unfamiliar with that? Remus what are you doing with him?”
James makes a low whimpering noise. “Reggie, please, you’re making it worse.”
“Don’t try to redirect the blame, brotherfucker,” Sirius hisses, “How dare you lay your hands on him? He’s a child! He’s like twelve!”
“I’m sixteen.”
“He looks like twelve.”
“I really don’t. Are you having a stroke?”
“If I do then it is because I just has to witness my best mate shoving his tongue down my baby brother’s throat!”
Remus sighed. “I knew he wouldn’t survive if he heard about any of this. James, I’ve told you not to make a move on him. Multiple times, I’ve told you!”
“To be fair,” Regulus cuts in, “I made a move on him.”
Sirius looks at him with his eyebrows almost up in his hairline. “You?”
“Yes. If you’re able to lower your voice, we can go downstairs and talk about it.”
“Sure, Reggie, of course, just let me fucking gut this bastard over there first!”
“No,” Regulus says calmly and grabs his brother’s arm this time. He slowly drags him out of the room.
Sirius stomps into the common room. His voice not lowered whatsoever. “Everybody out! Prefect’s boyfriend orders!”
No one really moves, aside from glancing up at him.
“Yeah, I don’t think that holds a lot of authoritative value,” Regulus comments.
Sirius squints. “I will annoy the fuck out of Remus and then let you all deal with him in a bad mood for the entire next day.”
In a sudden burst of movement, most of the students take up their things and rush out of the common room.
“Don’t make me upset him for the entire week,” he hisses towards the few remaining older students. Regulus wonders briefly where Peter and the girls have gone.
It doesn’t take another threat; they are alone in the common room in an instant.
Regulus sits down on one of the sofas. Sirius sits in the armchair, almost across from him like in an interrogation.
“So. Go ahead. Explain it to me.”
Regulus rolls his eyes again. “I don’t have to tell you shit, actually.”
“You just said you would.”
“I just wanted you to stop screaming at James.”
“Regulus Black, you have exactly one chance to explain this before I go upstairs and castrate that son of a bitch.”
“What would his mother say if she heard you say that?”
He points at him, “Don’t bring Effie into this.”
Regulus simply smirks at him. He leans back into the sofa.
“James is my boyfriend. There you go.”
“What do you mean there you go? What kind of explanation is that?”
Regulus shrugs. “I like him. He likes me. I think he’s stupid. He thinks I’m brilliant. I think he’s fit. He thinks I’m beautiful. It’s quite ideal, really.”
Sirius blinks at him once, twice.
“Okay… that sounds… tolerable.” He pulls in his bottom lip with his teeth. “You happy?”
Regulus smiles faintly at the fireplace. “Yes.”
“Good,” Sirius says after a while. “That’s important to me. I don’t want you to get hurt, Reggie.”
“Hurt? By James Potter? Have you met him?” he says with a small smirk. James, though cocky and arrogant, is the gentlest soul Regulus has ever met. He would give up his dessert before even shooing a bee. Really, Regulus has seen it.
Sirius smiles back at him. “Yeah, I guess he’s quite a good choice in boyfriend. Could have done way worse.”
“Thanks.”
Sirius sighs deeply. He stands up from the armchair and settles on the sofa next to Regulus. He leans his head against his little brother’s shoulder.
“Sirius, I had a thought.”
“Hmm, that’s dangerous.”
“I know James has asked you to leave home and go live with him instead, at least spend the holidays at his place.”
Sirius hums.
“James said, you rejected him because of me.”
“I wouldn’t go without you. … Was scared of ever asking you, though. Sometimes, you still seem attached to our parents.”
Regulus says nothing to that. “If James asks either of us to stay with him over the holidays I want us both to leave that house forever and go with him,” he says quietly.
Sirius looks up at him then quickly wraps his arms around Regulus. “Really?”
“Yes, really. Does that make this relationship better in your eyes?”
“Barely.” Sirius pulls back and smiles at him. “Thank you. You are aware that I have to punch him at least once though for shagging my little brother.”
“He didn’t even-“ Regulus stops himself and turns away from him. “We didn’t sleep with each other yet, so calm your horses. He wants to wait for the ‘right moment’ – he treats me like some precious virgin sometimes.”
He rolls his eyes until he catches sight of his brother again, who is staring at him horrified.
“Which I am, of course,” he says quickly.
Sirius buries his face in his hands, shaking his head. “I will just ignore you said that.”
“Thank you.”
“Just, out of interest, how many people would I have to kill if I didn’t ignore that?”
“Three,” Regulus shrugs.
“Three?! You’re sixteen.”
“It’s not my fault that you don’t have game.”
Sirius gasps and slaps the back of his head. “Wanker.”
Regulus is too occupied with being smug to give a reply.
“For how long have you been… dating him?”
“Five weeks.”
“Five weeks… and nothing?”
“No.”
“Wow. He is stupid.”
Regulus chuckles at that.
“I mean, it does make the whole thing more bearable.”
“Fuck off.”
Sirius grins at him and ruffles his hair. “Well, let’s go upstairs and scare the ever-loving shit out of that boy, shall we?”
“Do you have to?”
“Yes. You know I do.” He smirks at him and then races Regulus back up to the dorm room.
When they get to the room, James jumps up from his bed where he has doubtlessly been lectured by Remus.
“Sirius. I’m sorry. I really am. Listen: You can punch me wherever you want, you get one for free, yeah? But you can’t ask me to stay away from him, please. I can’t stay away from him. You can’t make me break up with him, please.” He spreads out his arms, offering his body, “Just not the glasses.”
Sirius walks up to James, looks him and down once. Without preamble, he makes a fist and punches him in the balls.
“Sirius!” Regulus exclaims. “I’ll need that!”
James is groaning and grunting, cupping his crotch with his hands. Sirius simply embraces him.
“Now, we’re good. If you ever hurt him, that will have been the gentlest thing I’ve done to you.”
“Okay,” James chokes out, “Thanks.”
Sirius pats his back and then lets go of him. James’ face is red and slightly twisted in pain. He lies down on his bed like a wounded animal.
“Really, Sirius?” Remus asked, “Was that necessary?”
“Yes. Now I am so gracious to leave the two alone in the dorm for the next few hours. I guess prank is off for the night. Come on Moony.”
Remus looks apologetically at James.
“Oh, Remus,” Regulus says, “If you ever call me straight again, I will claw your eyes out.”
“Noted.”
Regulus nods and closes the door in their faces.
He walks over to James and sits down on the side of the bed.
“Are you okay?”
“Sure,” he whispers, “Oh, that son of a bitch.”
“True,” Regulus smiles and kisses James.
“So, given that he left us alone, I guess your talk with him went well?”
“Yes. He called you stupid for not shagging me, though.”
“He knows and he still punched me in the balls?”
“Well, you’ve given him the opportunity. I would have done the same just for the sake of it.”
“That’s cruel.”
“Family trait,” he says with a shrug and kisses him softly.
“Hey, Reggie,” James mumbles, “Now that he knows I thought… I mean, if you want to, both of you, you could… come live with me. Don’t go home over the summer. Please, don’t go home over the summer.”
Regulus smiles. “I’d fucking love to. Would your parents be okay with that?”
“Of course. So, you’ll do it? You’ll come with me and live with me? You and Sirius?”
“Yes. Then I won’t have to go one day without kissing you.”
“Sounds like paradise,” James mumbles and pulls him in for another kiss.
***
Bonus: Peter and the Girls
The girls took Peter upstairs into their dorm soon after James went upstairs with the cat.
“I have to admit, I know we’re shit-talking men tonight, but James really improved over the last year,” Lily is saying, grabbing another flavoured sugar bean. Mary is sitting behind her, braiding her hair. “He’s a decent bloke when he’s not annoying me or singing for me or dancing.”
Marlene laughs, “We need to make a hitlist of James’ worst dances to impress Lily.”
Peter is painting her nails right now. “Number one has to be the one from second year when he fell of the table and knocked out his front tooth.”
The girls and Peter erupt in bubbly laughter.
“I have to agree, though,” Mary says, “I love how respecting he’s of our relationship, too. No jealous antics, no ‘I can make you straight’ – nothing. You’d really think he moved on.”
“Oh, he did move on,” Peter says, “For a long time already, actually, over the summer or end of summer, I’d say.”
“Good for him,” Lily smiles.
“Wait, does our romantic James Potter have a girlfriend?” Dorcas exclaims. Marlene is sitting between her legs, leaning against her. “Why did no one tell me?”
“No way that boy has a girlfriend, and no one knows. He would never love someone and not sing songs about it,” Mary grins and kisses Lily’s cheek.
“Not a girlfriend,” Peter smirks.
“What?” Marlene sits upright in an instant. “Peter Pettigrew, don’t tell me James has a boyfriend and you didn’t tell us immediately! We are sitting here for an hour, and you didn’t tell us that?”
Peter grins. “He has a boyfriend, and I assure you, Mary, he is singing a lot about that. He’s always singing and humming some fucking love songs day and night or staring at a certain constellation in his Astronomy book. He is so not subtle about it, he just thinks we’re blind. Granted, Sirius is blind to it. I’m not.”
“Oh, Merlin’s balls, Peter! Tell us everything!“
“Really, the best and worst part is, James thinks I don’t know,” Peter says. “Like, they forget I’m living in that dorm half the time. Oh, you want to study in the dorm alone for a while? Who does he think he’s kidding, really?”
“Who is it? You have to tell us who his boyfriend is.”
“No, I can’t tell you. … But you can guess. I give you one hint: Sirius would lose his bloody mind if he found out.”
The girls all turn to each other, passing looks.
“He’s not cheating with Remus, is he?” Lily frowns.
“No.”
“One of Remus’ ex-boyfriends?” Marlene asks, “Sirius has always been super jealous, imagine if James dates one of them and Sirius has to be around him all the time? He’d go crazy.”
“No, guess again,” Peter says simply.
They whisper some names to each other, people Sirius hates or has drama with – the list isn’t short.
“Oh!” Dorcas exclaims suddenly and hits the floor with her flat hand, “Oh! Fucking – constellation! Star! Oh, gods!”
“Yes,” Peter says with a smirk. The girls look at her like she has gone mad.
“No.”
“Yes.”
“No!”
“Absolutely.”
“Who?” Marlene asks excitedly.
“Regulus.”
“Regulus?”
“Regulus!”
“Regulus,” Peter confirms. The girls stare at him, all tasks on hair abandoned.
“Oh, that’s hilarious,” Mary says, “That’s fucking brilliant. Sirius’ little brother. James’ is fucked.”
The girls erupt in gasping laughter, quickly finding themselves in a contest of making impressions of Sirius finding out.
Marlene’s is by far the most accurate, dragging Dorcas, pretending to be Regulus, around the room by the arm screaming about James tainting his baby brother.