Chapter Text
Shoot for the moon. Keep shooting. Maybe try a bigger gun? We’ll get that jerk eventually.
Welcome to Night Vale.
Listeners, things have been… weird lately. You know I don’t like to talk about my personal life on this station, but I think this counts as news. So, as part of my job as an objective journalist…
You remember that guy I mentioned? Carlos, that Scientist. Well, he left that…weird voicemail the other day. I don’t even know how he got my number, to be honest, listeners. I don’t remember giving it to him. I don’t remember him arriving in town, either. He says he’s lived here for seven years, but really now, I think I would know if there had been scientists here for seven years.
(pause)
Time can be weird in Night Vale, and sometimes things seem…familiar, like some strange Deja Vu, as if…as if you’ve forgotten something. Something important, and there’s an uncomfortable twist in your stomach, and an echoing loneliness to your apartment, and you can’t help but wonder…
Well, we all know that feeling. And we all know that it isn’t real. None of this was real, and I refuse to speak or think about it ever again.
Let’s go from this report, about nothing, that never happened, to the news.
(Rustling papers)
(muttered) Oh you’ve got to be kidding me
Ahem. A… scientist – who I’ve never met before, who I’m sure is a completely normal, sane man – called a town meeting today. Intern Monica, who was sent to report on it, described him as (reading off paper) having perfect hair, a square jaw, and teeth like… a military cementary. Well, that might be true, Intern Monica, but let’s keep it relevant, please. He told us that we are, by far, the most scientifically interesting community in the US, and he had come to study just what is going on around here. He grinned, and…scanned the room, as if looking for something, or someone. Then he looked disappointed, and left.
I pity him, this strange man. I pity anyone caught between a feeling, and the unsympathetic, unbudging reality.
Stay tuned next for the sound of you, staring at your screen, wondering if you ought to go to bed yet. You really should, listener.
Good night, Night Vale. Good night.