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Nene had sworn that today would go off without a hitch. Today was going to be a great day. Going to a restaurant and eating fake Italian food was a great idea, was it not?
Oh, how wrong she was.
Nene would learn something about one of her friends that she would have preferred to not learn: Emu Ootori does not like using utensils to eat food.
That includes when she’s eating soup
That includes when she’s eating soup.
When Nene had gotten home, she mournfully checked something off of her bucket list:
Get kicked out of/banned from a restaurant at least once.
It was not supposed to be her favorite Olive Garden. Emu Ootori had a permanent ban, while the rest of the troupe had a one month ban, just by association. Nene swore she saw a tear roll down Tsukasa’s cheek when management approached their table. Rui had sunk into his chair.
Rui was ashamed?
She had never seen her friend look so bashful. He practically folded in on himself.
Getting banned from Olive Garden was no easy feat. Nene had sworn up and down that today would be a nice lunch out. It would be a necessary break from planning shows with everyone else nonstop. Lunch was good! Lunch was great!
Not with Emu.
They had sat down at their table, and a waitress had come over. She placed a basket of breadsticks on the table and pulled out a notepad.
“Hello, welcome to Olive Garden! My name is Akiko, and I will be your waitress today! What drinks can I get you started with?”
“Four chocolate milks please!” Emu exclaimed, smiling ear to ear. The waitress stared blankly.
“You can only order one drink per person.” Emu’s smile fell.
“I’ll have chocolate milk as well,” Nene interrupted quickly. She planned on giving it to Emu. The restaurant will have free water anyways.
“I will also have chocolate milk, if you would be so kind,” Tsukasa said, flashing a dazzling smile. The waitress looked unimpressed.
“And for you?”
“Water,” Rui said, smiling at the rest of the group. A tear formed in Emu’s eye. The waitress smiled, or attempted to. It resembled more of a line. She walked away, sighing. Emu turned to Rui, pure fury on her face.
“Rui! Everyone else was getting chocolate milk to give to me!”
“Okay?” Rui responded, looking at his nails. “I need to file my nails soon…”
“You’re hopeless,” Tsukasa mumbled, reaching for a breadstick. His hand closed on nothing. He looked at the basket, confused. Where had all the breadsticks gone? They were just there a moment ago! Nene heard a crunch next to her, and looked over in horror.
Emu Ootori had taken five breadsticks and shoved them all in her mouth, practically swallowing them whole. Rui blinked slowly, rubbing his eyes.
“Did you just eat five breadsticks in less than ten seconds?” Emu grinned ear to ear.
“Yep!”
“Jesus Christ,” Nene whispered, placing her head in her hands.
“Did that girl just eat five breadsticks?”
“Holy shit, I think she did!” Nene groaned into her palms. If anyone recognized them, it would be their downfall.
The waitress returned with three glasses of chocolate milk and one water. She placed them in front of the troupe, and Tsukasa and Nene slowly slid their glasses to Emu. Rui sipped on his water, enjoying the spectacle.
“Are you all ready to order?” Everyone nodded, and she pulled out her notepad and turned to Nene. “What can I get you?”
“May I get the chicken marsala fettuccine please?”
“Soup or salad?”
“Salad.” She turned to Tsukasa.
“For you?”
“Chicken tortellini alfredo, if that’s alright!”
“Soup or salad?”
“Salad, please.”
She nodded, and pivoted her body to face Rui, nodding at him.
“Fettuccine alfredo, please.”
“Soup or salad?”
“Soup.”
“Which soup?”
“May I please have the chicken and gnocchi without spinach?”
The waitress scribbled on her notepad before closing her eyes. She took a deep breath, and opened her eyes. She faced Emu.
“What can I get you?”
“HAHAHAHA! Wonderhoy!” The waitress gave a pained smile.
“Uh…”
“SAAAAAAA!”
“Huh?”
“Uh, Emu?”
“WONDERHOY!”
“Emu, lower your voice!” She continued to speak nonsense.
“Can I get the chicken tenders?”
“How old are you?”
“Sixteen!”
“Yeah, no, you can’t order off the kids menu.”
A tear formed in Emu’s eyes, and she started sniffling. “Why not?”
“Because it’s the rules.” Another tear formed. “Okay, you can have chicken tenders,” the waitress mumbled, clearly unhappy. Emu immediately brightened.
“Wonderhoy!”
“Soup or salad?” Life had drained from the waitress’ eyes and voice.
“Soup!”
“Which soup?”
“Same one as him!” She excitedly pointed at Rui. The waitress nodded again. She walked away, her head hung in defeat.
“What the hell is a ‘wonderhoy’?” Nene heard her whisper, and she snorted into her hand.
Wonderful question.
Soon enough, the waitress came back, holding the bowls of soup and salad. She placed them in front of everyone, and nodded politely.
“Enjoy!” She walked away, heading in the direction of the kitchen again. Nene pulled her fork out of the napkin and started poking at her salad. She didn't know why she ordered it. She was never a huge fan of salads. Too much in too little space.
Tsukasa gasped when Emu cupped her hand and dipped them into her bowl of soup, sipping out of her hands. Nene had never seen such bullshit!
“What are you, a peasant?” Tsukasa asked, jaw practically hanging open. Rui silently sipped his soup.
“What are you, a cop? Mind your business,” Emu responded, soup dripping between her fingers. Rui breathed sharply out of his nose, placing the spoon in the bowl before covering his mouth to laugh. Emu glared.
“I— uh… I have to use the restroom,” he said before standing up. He covered his mouth again and walked in the direction of the bathroom, his shoulders shaking from laughter.
“Jesus Christ,” Nene quietly whispered, and Tsukasa silently pulled his phone up to record Emu. He looked at Nene before mouthing “Blackmail,” and she nodded quickly, going back to her salad. Emu continued whatever the hell she was doing, and Rui joined them again a few minutes later.
“My apologies.”
Their server came up to them, making a pained face as she caught sight of Emu.
“Your food will be out in a moment. Also, the other patrons have requested that you use utensils.” Rui snorted and placed his forehead on the table, narrowly missing his soup. The server walked away, her mouth a thin line. Nene’s phone buzzed, and saw a text from Saki.
hey, are you and my brother at olive garden rn? what’s going on at that table???? literally chaos over there!!
Nene physically cringed before typing.
Unfortunately. Please ignore Emu. The rest of us are sane.
yeah, and my brother is straight
Nene snorted. Tsukasa glanced up, raising an eyebrow.
“Your sister’s here.” He made a sour face and looked around for her. They made eye contact. She waved at him, and Tsukasa waved back, his expression immediately changing to a bright smile. The second he turned back around, his face fell and he put his head in his hands.
“This is too embarrassing for a future star…” Usually, Tsukasa was overjoyed to see Saki in public. Running into someone you know in public is always fun, especially if you don't plan it. Today, however, was the only exception. Being out with your friends is usually fine, as long as they don’t try to eat soup with their hands. So, no, it was not fine to see friends in this instance. Emu continued to drink her soup.
“Why are you eating soup with your hands, Emu?” Emu looked at Nene, tilting her head to the side slightly.
“Why do you eat soup with a spoon?”
“I'm eating a salad.”
“Why are you eating salad with a fork?”
“Because it’s easier.”
“No, it’s not!”
“And eating soup with your hands is?”
“Yep!”
“I give up,” Nene sighed, her head returning to her hands.
Rui stirred his soup absentmindedly. Tsukasa continued to film. Nene felt mental tears roll down her face.
The waitress returned later, plates in hand. She looked like she had been crying. It was definitely because of Emu. She placed the plates down, handing them to each person. Emu’s hands still had soup on them. Did she not know what a napkin was as well? Emu’s lack of table manners amazed Nene. The waitress smiled at them.
“Is there anything else I can get you?”
“No!” Nene and Tsukasa shouted in sync, almost as if they sensed the ruckus that Emu might cause if she wanted anything more. Akiko walked away, whispering under her breath. There was probably a reason Nene couldn’t hear it this time.
Nene started on her pasta, silently twirling it around her fork. Emu continued on her soup. The sight was something to behold. Tsukasa and Rui began chatting, their eyes practically glazed over.
“I don’t think I’m ever going to go back here just out of embarrassment,” Rui mumbled.
“You? Embarrassed? Please!” Tsukasa responded.
Akiko returned, holding four boxes in hand. She placed them at the table.
“I’m sorry, but we just began eating. Is there a reason for giving us these boxes?” Just as the words left Tsukasa’s mouth, another member of staff approached.
“Hello, my name is Matsuo, and I am the manager of this Olive Garden. We have received numerous complaints about this table, and we would like you to leave.”
Rui sunk into his chair. Tsukasa’s eyes watered. Emu continued whatever she was doing. Nene very quietly turned to face the man, a nervous smile on her face. Is this how the waitress felt while they were there?
Probably.
“Oh,” is all Nene said, gently pulling the box in her direction. “Sorry.”
“Also, we are issuing bans for this whole lot.” Tsukasa sat straight up, his arms flailing.
“NO! It was just her!” Tsukasa practically shouted, pointing at Emu. The manager looked over the table.
“One month ban for you,” pointing at Rui, “you,” pointing at Tsukasa, “and you,” pointing at Nene. “You are permanently banned,” he declared, pointing at Emu. “I never want to see your face in this restaurant again.”
Nene hurriedly began scooping pasta into her box, and Tsukasa followed quickly. Soon enough, the box was closed, and no food remained on the plate.
“Uh, how much is the bill?”
“Just leave please.”
“Free food,” Rui mumbled, scraping his pasta into the box. “I love free food.” Emu silently put her chicken tenders into the box.
“Get out.” The troupe made a mad dash for the door, holding their boxes and bags. In the safety of the outside, they began walking.
“So… at least the food was good?” Tsukasa said, ever the optimist.
“Sure,” Nene muttered, rubbing her head with her hand. Olive Garden was not a place to be trifled with. Hopefully they wouldn’t see those faces at Phoenix Wonderland anytime soon.