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“I could just stare at you forever.” Mizuki dreamily murmured, their eyes trained at Ena. Ena glanced up, catching their look.
“Ew.. creep.” She deadpanned, causing Mizuki to burst out laughing.
“You really don’t hold back, haha!” They giggled before trailing off.
Ena stood up. “Whatever.” She clenched her fists.
Mizuki became slightly worried. “Ena..? Is something wrong?”
“You never change. No matter what I do. I just… wish I knew what you would be doing now if you were still around..” Ena whispered, tears welling up in her eyes.
Mizuki was gone. Ena punched the wall, feeling no pain from her now bleeding hand.
Fuck.
It had been three years. Three years since Mizuki’s death.
Ena still thought about them.
Why had they done it..? Ena had promised she would wait forever but Mizuki was never ready.
If only Mizuki knew how much Ena had really cared.
Ena daydreamed about Mizuki a lot... They were the only thing she painted now. But she could never quite get their face right.
She had gone through dozens upon dozens of canvases but nothing ever worked.
Ena was tired. So, so, tired.
Mizuki glanced up at Ena as she sat down next to them on the shady park bench.
“Hello, Mizuki…” She said, her voice cracking. There were bags under her eyes and her hair was a mess.
Mizuki smiled softly and brushed Ena’s bangs out of her face.
“Hi, Ena.” They replied. They were wearing their school uniform, although it seemed a bit roughed up. The pale skin on their legs showing dark purpling bruises.
This was a week before the incident happened , Ena recalled. She often dreamed about this moment in her sleep. She had tried to study every moment of these dreams for her paintings but the dreams never seemed right either.
Mizuki fiddled with their cuffs. “How… was your day..?” They said hesitantly.
Ena groaned and put her head down on the table.
“It was exhausting. You make it better though..” Ena smiled sadly.
Mizuki blushed. “Thanks.”
They sat in silence for a moment before Ena spoke.
“Are you… okay..?” She said, not meeting their eyes.
Mizuki didn’t reply.
Ena sighed before turning to Mizuki. She stared them straight in the face.
“Mizuki, if something is wrong you can tell me.”
“It’s fine.”
“ IT’S NOT FINE, MIZUKI. ” Ena yelled, slamming her fists on the table. “STOP FUCKING LYING.” She stood up and stared down at Mizuki.
“I told you I would wait for as long as you needed, but if you keep getting injured then I won’t be able to wait much longer. You have to tell someone eventually.”
And with that, Ena walked away.
It turns out Mizuki didn’t need to tell anyone after all.
Because Mizuki died a week later.
Ena remembered that week vividly, although Mizuki’s expression was always blurry.
Why couldn’t she just see their face?
Ena’s paintbrush snapped between her fingers.
“Agh-“ She hissed, looking down at her bloodied hand. The paintbrushes' jagged edges had sliced her finger. She rubbed it off on her smock, ignoring the twinge of pain.
It didn’t matter anymore.
Her painting stared at her, it’s eyes all wrong- It stared at her and it judged her.
It judged her like everyone else had.
She had spoken with Kanade and Mafuyu only once since Mizuki’s passing. The conversation… didn’t go over well, to say the least.
Ena had met with them in person- at the same café they used to visit for parties after a song release.
Mafuyu and Kanade didn’t know yet… how could they? They didn’t go to the same school or anything.
Ena sad down, keeping her face emotionless.
Kanade looked up from her ramen. “Ah, Ena. Do you know when Mizuki will get here?”
Ena couldn’t stop herself. She burst into tears.
“Ena, are you okay?!” Kanade stood up, reaching over the table unsure how to help her friend.
“Ena. What happened to Mizuki.” Mafuyu said bluntly, her eyes narrowing.
Ena wiped her face on her sleeve, her eyes puffy and swollen.
“Mizuki… Mizuki is dead.” Ena choked out, tears threatening to pour over again.
Kanade froze.
“What?” Mafuyu spoke first.
“You must be joking.” Kanade said, her face twitching into a shocked expression.
Ena shook her head fervently, tears pouring from her eyes.
Mafuyu wiped her face with her hand. “Am I… crying?”
Mafuyu had never cried before. She didn’t know what to do. So she lashed out.
“Why didn’t you tell us sooner?! You were closest to Mizuki. This is your fault. ” Ena didn’t remember exactly what Mafuyu said but that's what she heard.
She returned home in a daze and never spoke to them again. Kanade had dmed her, although she never replied.
Mizuki held Ena’s hand gently, leading her through the mall.
“I have to ask you something important, so let's go to the new coffee shop!~” they said in a singsong voice, and Ena followed, a blush dusting her cheeks.
When they arrived, Mizuki led her to a small round table in the corner. Fairy lights were strung up all around, and vines were placed along the walls.
Ena ran her fingers over the table. “It’s pretty.”
“You’re prettier.” Mizuki teased, causing Ena’s brain to short circuit.
“Wh- no I’m not!” She stammered, crossing her arms.
Mizuki pulled a chair out from the table and gestured to it. “My lady?” They giggled.
Ena sat down. “Wow, charming.”
Mizuki sat down across from her and called over a waiter. After ordering themself a coffee and Ena a slice of cheesecake, they returned to the task at hand.
“Ena… can I ask you something?”
Ena nodded.
Mizuki grinned. “Will you go to the dance with me?”
Ena turned bright red and averted her eyes. “Oh- uhm- yes?”
Mizuki smiled wider. “You’re so cute when you’re embarrassed.”
Ena turned back to them, covering her face with her hands. “Shut up you dummy…”
They both burst out laughing.
Oh how Ena wished she could go back.
Ena did blame herself. After all, she had been there. She was there.
The night Mizuki died.
It was the night of the dance.
Ena showed up on Mizuki’s doorstep, a corsage contained in the small glass box she was holding.
Mizuki opened the door and squealed, thanking her.
They put it on, perfectly complimenting the dress they wore. It was a soft pink with beautiful ribbon and ruffles.
Ena had worn a tux, deciding against her usual style. She thought Mizuki might appreciate it.
And she was right. Mizuki wouldn’t shut up about how amazing Ena looked.
They walked hand in hand to the school, bright lights shining through the windows.
And that was the last night Ena saw them. Her memories were a blur- only coming back in flickers during nightmares or panic attacks, when all she wanted to do was forget.
She had been there on the roof.
The night Mizuki died.
It was all her fault.
She had said she was willing to wait forever, but forever was far too long.
But tonight that all ended. She wouldn’t have to wait any longer.
She could join Mizuki soon.
They would never be apart again.
As her body fell, the stars painted a beautiful scene across her vision.
Her blood on the concrete, a final goodbye.
Her broken body, a cry for help.
The tears in her eyes, a silent apology.
That final night- her magnum opus.