Chapter Text
After the keyblade war, and with Xehanort’s defeat, the worlds were safe from darkness. The guardians were finally able to rest and be at peace. With friends being reunited with those lost from long ago. With those who were hurt having the closure they were looking for. Even some unknown truths coming to light since then. It seemed everything was alright again and at peace for most of the guardians.
Everything just seemed to move so fast with moving on after the battle. Most mourning those who were lost and others trying to bring back Sora. It almost felt like yesterday when Sora went to save her. Using the power of waking to find her shattered heart to put her back together.
Those final moments with him felt like a fading dream. Reuniting together once more, to end the battle side by side. Calling upon their friends to help with the final blow. The two were finally working to reform their weakened bond. Going from world-to-world talking and enjoying the short time they had left. Bringing Chirithy back to reunite with Ventus. Unlocking Namine’s heart so she can have her own life again.
To get to watch the sunset together, on that same tree that they would always sit at when they were kids. The tree where the three of them used to watch the sunset together. The tree where they planned to build the raft, and where they all came back to reunite for the first time. The tree where the two got to keep a childhood promise and shared two paopu fruits with each other.
“This charm will make sure we won’t be separated again.” The unspoken promise finally being kept. With Sora’s final moments comforting her by squeezing her hand. Saying his final words before, he faded away completely.
“Take care of him.” Those words stuck with her. Kairi remembered when Riku told her that he said something similar. He mentioned it was when they closed the door to darkness.
“Take care of her.” She knew the meaning behind the words was sincere. Even if a little part of her didn’t know if she could keep that promise. So, she went to sleep seeing if there was any way her heart could find Sora. There had to be some clues somewhere in her memory.
She had been asleep for a year finding little to nothing that could help find him. Only finding deep secrets from her past. She was being sent out to find the keyblade. To find out who ripped her away from her world.
Xehanort, it was always him. The words he said echoed as if to taunt her.
“You seek clues to Sora’s whereabouts by using your memories of him, to search through your own heart… But there’s nothing for you to find here. I’m afraid the answers you seek lies in memories that are long gone.” Upon waking, she felt as if all she got was memories of the past but was no closer to finding Sora.
In the end again it was up to Riku to save Sora. Kairi couldn't help but feel a longing to join him to help him bring back Sora. To keep the promise, she was left with.
But she knew it wasn't her time. After her year of sleep with no results and only bringing back bad memories, she pushed herself to train with Aqua. Something to keep her mind off the events that happened. To keep her mind off him.
She blamed herself for what happened to Sora, and it didn't help with the nightmares bringing back those memories. 'Maybe if I was stronger then.' 'Maybe if I didn't show up on the islands.' 'Maybe if I reached out more to him.' These thoughts are always in the front of her mind. What if's that would never leave her alone.
It didn't help once the day came when she finished her training.
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It was like it was yesterday when Ven came to her room to see if she was ready. "Kairi! You ready?" Smiling to herself she responded, "Yes I'll just be a second."
Before she finished getting dressed. She looked in the mirror noticing her muscles have grown over the months of training. 'Sora and Riku would be proud.' She thought before turning to put her top on only to see the scar that remained on her back. A reminder of that day. The day she wasn't strong enough, wasn't fast enough. She hated it but saw it as a reminder of her failure. 'If only I was stronger then.'
Staring for a moment she couldn't help but remember those nightmares that always haunted her. That day with Xehanort’s voice always echoing through them. "It's your fault he's gone." "You practically led me to him." "No wonder you were left behind." "Weak." Repeated and again each night. She hated it, hated him, she hated herself for being weak.
"Kairi are you doing okay in there?" Vens voice echoed through snapping her out of those thoughts. "Y-Yeah I'm coming." Throwing on the rest of her outfit before opening the door startling Ven in the process.
"Morning." He said with a smile before looking at her hair. "You have your hair down today. I-it looks nice." He says with an embarrassed tone and light blush. "It is?" she says before realizing her hair is down not noticing the other comment.
Picking up on this Ven speaks "Are you sure you're going to be okay for today? I know that you haven't been sleeping well since Riku left. It's okay if you need a break, I'm sure Aqua would understand." She knew Ven means well, he always makes sure she's okay and never over does it when training. He is always there checking in and she appreciates it but...
"No, I'm fine besides I'd hate to keep everyone waiting. After all everyone came to support me today." Roxas, Xion, Namine and Axel all showed up to watch today in support for her, she couldn't let them down. They even managed to get Isa to come. "If you're certain then let's head down there" Ven says before they walk down the hall.
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Upon reaching the room they used for training almost everyone was there aside from Haner, Pence and Olette but most of everyone was there waiting. Taking a deep breath Kairi paced forward before greeting Aqua. "Good morning, Master Aqua." Turning Aqua looked towards her with a soft smile before saying "I told you before Kairi you don't have to call me Master. Aqua is fine."
Nodding with a smile Kairi looks over to wave to the others after hearing Axel yell "You got this Kairi." While seeing Roxas and Xion trying to settle him down before Isa wacked him.
Chuckling, she looks towards Ven before saying "I'm right behind you." Ven had passed his training only a couple weeks back. Kairi remembered how stressed he was pacing and always looking to her for advice.
"I know you got this." He said giving her a warm smile which left her with a faint blush before he went to sit by Terra. "Are you ready Kairi?" Aqua asked. "I'm ready."
The start of the test wasn't so bad, just whacking some orbs that randomly appeared it was confusing to say the least, but she guessed her and Ven's test would be different somehow. Once she managed to keep them stable, she was tasked with using magic.
She remembers how in battle with the seekers she wasn't confident in her ability to cast spells. Even if she still a little iffy on them Kairi was happy to say she improved from casting firaga, thundaga, blizzaga and even curaga. She knew she still struggled with some but, she picked up on most when training.
After displaying her ability to cast, her next task wasn't what she expected. "Aqua?" Aqua took a step forward before saying "Your last and final task is to face me. This will not only show how far you've come in mind, skill, combat but, more importantly in heart." She states for everyone to hear in the room.
Ventus looked beyond nervous for her but still trying to be encouraging he gave her a thumbs up. The others looked just as shocked as she felt. Kairi knew Ven had to face Terra but, he didn't face Aqua she thought it'd be the same. "Are you ready for your last task?" Kairi took a deep breath.
She's come so far; she can't stop now. "Kairi you got this!" She hears on the side from Axel. With the others chiming in. "Show her what you can do!" With that Kairi took a step forward and spoke. "I'm ready."
What happened next was Aqua charging towards her with keyblade in hand with Kairi nearly not blocking in time. 'Time to focus.' Kairi pushes her back with as much strength as she can muster up. Kairi began to swing back dodging swing after swing while throwing some hits back with just as much strength. Kairi displaying not only her skills in keeping up with Aqua but, her reaction time as well.
Using reflect to block out spells and blows coming from all sides of her. Before taking her chance to charge in for a swing whenever there was an opening. She was doing so well before Aqua managed to catch her off guard disarming her. "Do you yield?"
'No not again.' Kairi slowly starts to spiral in her thoughts. 'Just like that day. Just like when you couldn't fight back. Weak.' As if seeing her distress out of the corner of her eye she saw Ven shouting "Don't give up. You’ve come so far you can do this!"
She looked around to see Axel waiting in anticipation and the others holding their breaths for what would happen. Ven was right, she couldn’t just give up now she had to keep going. Pulling herself together she pushed all the strength she had to the front of her mind.
"No.." she muttered. As she slowly started to look up towards Aqua. "No?" Aqua responded before Kairi looked up towards her fully facing her before saying loud and clear. "No, I do not yield!"
Before summoning her keyblade in her other hand and swinging Aqua's right out of her hand. She had managed not only to catch her off guard but to switch their positions. With her keyblade pointed at her master, Kairi looked down to see Aqua's face grow with a smile before saying "Not bad. You've shown great skill, strength, and confidence today. With my greatest pleasure to say you have passed.”
The room erupted into sound with Axel running and hugging her shouting "I knew you could do it princess." With the others swarming around her. 'I did it. I finished my training.' She thought to herself but for some reason still felt it wasn't enough. "Never doubted you for a second." Roxas says to her with a light punch. "Yeah, me and Nami were sure you could overcome this." Said Xion with a smile. Kairi appreciated all of them even Isa said congratulations.
She felt fine. She told herself she managed to finish what she wanted, right?
"Kai." Snapping out of her thoughts she noticed almost everyone was gone but one. Ven was standing there waiting for her. "I wanted to say you were amazing out there. I knew you could do it." He said with a smile.
"Thank you I couldn't have done it without our secret sparring practices." She says causing a faint blush on Ven’s face. She knew there was a high chance Aqua knew about them but never really had the heart to tell Ven because he was so happy about it being “their thing” that no one else knew. A time where they could open up and just talk about what happened. Even if the others got to talk with them about it, it never felt as easy as it did with Ven for Kairi. It reminded her how easy it used to be to talk to Sora. She missed him so much and Riku.
Shaking the thought from her head she looked at Ven properly and tapped him on the shoulder to get his attention before saying. "Where did the others go?" Snapping out of whatever trance Ven had been in, he smiled awkwardly with his face getting a little redder. "They went to go watch the stars and to celebrate outside. Did you want to join them?" Thinking about it for a moment, she agreed before they both walked outside to join the others.
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That night was so sweet and fun with everyone enjoying their time. Kairi couldn’t help but smile a little even if it didn't fully reach her eyes. She still had that feeling of wanting to be stronger that she wasn't strong enough. That she wasn't good enough. The nightmares never really went away, only increasing in her time after training. It didn't help being back on Destiny Islands, it didn't feel the same. She loved reconnecting with Selphie and the others, but she couldn't help but feel alone.
Riku and Sora still haven't returned in the time she started training. All she could do was hope they were alright wherever they were. She just wished she could be more help to them. Weeks had gone by after the night of her exam, but she couldn't help but miss training. It helps keep the thoughts away which only seemed to get worse each day.
She even confided in Namine about them, who she felt was the closest to understanding what she was feeling. Even if it was just a little, she tried to be there for her even if it hurt Kairi a little to see Roxas, Xion and Namine happy together. She wished she felt like that. But that all changed one week when they all were visiting Land of Departure.
It started off fine but, with everyone seeming busy and stressed upon planning their next course of action since they just lost contact with Donald and Goofy as if they just vanished. The king said they were off on other worlds before disappearing at some point.
It reminded Kairi of the time when they were all searching for Sora. It doesn't help that they lost contact with Riku in his dream state a couple months back. All this stress only made the nightmares worse. Making Kairi's waking thoughts louder. She began to keep to herself with one thought that rang in her head loud and clear.
'What if I went back? What if I used the power of waking like he did. I could change things.' The thought only got louder and louder as the week progressed before Kairi confided in Namine about it with Roxas overhearing to her dismay.
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"What do you mean you want to go back? You can't be serious about using the power of waking, can you?" he exclaimed frustrated. Kairi didn't plan on anyone else hearing about her plan. Especially since she was planning to only let Namine know and hopefully get her help. "I don't know Roxas would it even effect things if she went back like Xehanort did?" Namine chimed.
"OF COURSE, IT WILL! IT COULD MESS EVERYTHING UP!" he shouts. "It was just a thought..." Kairi says slightly defeated. "It better stay just a thought. I'm sorry Kairi I know you miss them we all do but, you wouldn't only be risking yourself but everyone else's lives too." Roxas said before trying to give a comforting hug to Kairi even if it was awkward. "Just promise me that you'll tell us when you have thoughts like this Kairi." He says before leaving and nodding towards Namine to come to. Leaving Kairi to her thoughts. 'But what if it was different...'
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A couple nights later Kairi made her decision. She was going to do it she was going to try and use the power of waking. She gathered her things and got dressed unaware of the pair of eyes watching her. Before she entered one of the further rooms in the tower, to make sure she wasn't seen. Before trying to remember how she heard Sora access it. 'Look into your heart and reach out.' She closed her eyes before trying to focus on her heart and the connections they had before trying to focus on the memories of the past. But before she fully could she heard the door creak.
"K-Kairi what are you doing?" It was Namine looking at her in concern. "Interesting seeing you up at this hour Namine." She said trying to change the subject and distract her. "Kairi..." she says in a soft voice. "I know you miss him. I know you miss them both. But this isn't the way."
Sighing Kairi looks fulling towards her. "But what other way then. We lost Riku and now even Donald and Goofy are gone. What if there's a chance, even just a little, to go back and change things. To save Sora and make sure we lose no one else." Kairi says before turning back and trying again.
"Kairi, I know what you're feeling but, we have to have faith in them. When have Riku or Sora ever not defied the odds that were stacked against them." She states, "There has to be another way than this..." Kairi sighs before stating "Whether you are with me or not my mind has been made up I have to try at least."
It didn't help her nightmares started to push her towards this decision. Saying things like "Not like you can go back." "Not like him you're not strong enough." "What change could you bring?" that voice constantly there.
Namine who sighs reluctantly says "If I can't stop you can I at least make sure you don't hurt yourself?" With a nod Kairi begins again this time it feels different like a breeze was picking up in the room and a warm feeling in her chest spreading through her heart. 'I think I'm doing it.'
She raises her arm before summoning her keyblade. 'This is it. It must be.' But as her keyblade produced a bright light she heard muffled footsteps running straight towards them with the door bursting open with Roxas standing in its presence.
"KAIRI STO-" but before he could finish the light consumed all three of them. Leaving a very quiet and messy room. With the only knowledge that they were there being a bag of items scattered across the floor.