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Now Tim has tried he really has.
He hasn’t killed the Joker or Murdered Bruce really, he’s tried. But no amount of self-control will be enough to save Superman.
He was excited to hang out with Kon. It doesn't help that he might have a slight crush on the clone which he will be burying deep in his thoughts before Superboy somehow finds out. Yet nothing prepared him for the amount of bullshit that was about to come out of his mouth.
“Robin. Hey, did you hear me.” He looks vaguely concerned as he snaps trying to get Tim’s attention which he should be considering Tim is ten seconds away from going full Supervillian on Clark fucking Kent.
He’s Robin he’s got this, “I’m sorry I think I misheard where are you living” Superboy laughs “Cadmus I mean they feed me, and they leave me alone unless they need me to punch something really it’s great.” Tim does not have this; he's lying to himself. “What does Superman think, you said you were talking to him?”
He looks at Tim with a soft look biting his lip. He almost missed what he said, imagining that mouth doing something else. “Oh, he thinks it’s a great idea, just think I can keep an eye on them, so he won’t have to. He even showed me around the Fortress, Rob you won’t believe how amazing it’s there.” Great Superman you made it, so Tim had to kick a fucking puppy cause that's what He looked like right now a happy dog whose owner just showed it attention.
“Oh, really what is it like and what else did you guys talk about”. Tim has been there a dozen times he has broken in he put security there fucking Superman.
“He gave me a name like a Kryptonian name. Can you believe it.” His tail is actually wagging. He wonders how much kryptonite he can get in twenty minutes. “Oh my god that is Amazing. Can you tell me what it is or is it like a secret.” Superboy needs to stop looking at him because Tim’s pants are getting tight and the cup fucking hurts. “ I can tell you I wouldn’t want to keep it a secret, it's Kon-El isn’t it awesome.”
Tim is actually going to have to kill someone also himself but mostly Superman deep breathes Tim ok we can do this we can blow up Arkham Kill the Joker everything we can remain calm. Now he is in no way fluent, but he is well aware that Kon-El means abomination Superman did not have the fucking balls to name Superboy that right like it didn’t fucking happen. No, it didn’t Tim will call him Connor that works yep ok.
“Oh, that's awesome I am so happy for you, but you know I think I have a great nickname too if that’s fine with you of course.” Connor looks so fucking excited he swears he just vibrated. “Yes, what's the nickname tell me tell me.”
He might have just been possessed by Bart Allen. “What about Connor or Kon for short.” Superboy is actually vibrating. “ Yes I love it Rob so much now I just got to get your real name and then it’s like we know everything about each other.” The smile he is giving Tim is brighter than the sun and it's killing him.
Now in the back of Tim’s mind he has been planning Kon can’t live like this now he’s sure he missed some details, but he can’t live with Superman or the idiots who abused and cloned him. Clearly Tim is the only one with a brain cell so he will have to fix this.
“I know you seem to really like living with Cadmus.” Which what the fuck. “But are they feeding you or paying you?” Kon looks baffled at his question “Well no but I live there for free, and they give me energy bars they don’t taste all that good and they don’t give a lot but it’s ok.” He thinks he’s going to cry why what he has done to deserve this clearly the entire world needs to burn he was going to wait until Bruce died but maybe he can just knock him out yah that will work.
“Alright hey why don’t we watch a movie and order some pizza.” Kon’s shoulders rise to his head. “Oh, that's fine whatever you want to watch but I can’t really afford that.” Yep, Metropolis is already on fire. “Oh please it’s my treat and you pick the movie while I order.”
Twenty minutes later Pizza was ordered. Tim has set up a bank account, transferred ten thousand dollars and already looked into apartments. He walks back to Kon happily watching what he thinks might be Iron man; he is still trying not to actively murder something. “Hey, you took a while I was worried you ran away.” Kon looks slightly nervous but still happy as a sun. “Oh, I’m sorry it took a minute to figure out what I wanted, what are we watching.” Kon yanks him down on the couch next to him rapidly explaining how he saw the trailer and thought Tim would like it to cause it’s a guy with a suit of tech.
After another twenty minutes pizza gets there Kon happily munching on two of the pepperonis that Tim got for him. He waits not wanting to scare Kon because if he eats first before running at least Tim fed him.
“Alright out with it Rob you got your plotting face and I’m nervous.” His teeth are blinding Tim, and he just lost more blood. That is the only explanation for what Tim just blurted out. “Move in with me.” Kons pizza dropping out of his hand.
“Ok hear me out, you can’t stay with them and I’m all by myself and you're my best friend and I’m half in love with you. Live with me in a Metropolis or Gotham cause as of 20 minutes ago I own places in both.” Tim just actually fucked himself like what why did he just say that is he dumb. Too many concussions are the only explanation.