Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

Yuu has always been self sufficient.

Well, maybe not always. There used to be a time where Yuu had reached out to their parents, but after a while, it seemed... pointless. Like trying to strike a match when it's wet.

It must have been when Yuu was around six years old that they stopped looking for their parents when they feared the dark. There was no reason to do so. They knew their parents wouldn’t be anywhere where they could be found. They were never ‘just down the hall.' They never had a bed that Yuu could climb into, feeling safe between the people who would keep the scary monsters away. They didn't have their father there to go into Yuu's closet and chase the monsters out, just like there were no mornings where they laid their cheek on their mother's lap, her fingers working through the tangles in Yuu's hair.

Even if their parents were at the house for once, it wasn't like Yuu could go to them then, either.

When Yuu asked their parents what could hide in the closet or underneath the bed, they were scolded- shut down without a clue as to why Yuu would ever ask.

“How could you believe in such nonsense?”

Never mind that Yuu was a child that didn’t have the concept of what ‘sense’ is at all. Often, Yuu's parents would talk as though Yuu was much older than they really were, and in those conversations, it was better to accept that they had said something dumb, or that their parents knew better than they did. All Yuu could do was nod their head, accepting a long list of reasons why not to succumb to the idea of foolish things such as monsters, and how imagination is only good when tempered under "refined patience and sound thinking."

Their parents were never the loving type, that much is obvious. They were more focused on their research than their only child. Yuu has known, since what feels like birth, what their existence was for. It was never about love.

Their least favorite conspiracy theory? Their parents only had them because they wanted them to take over their research when they retired. Someone needed to take it over, and who better to trust than a child with both of their DNA, who had been grown under the ideal conditions?

(Yuu often wondered if maybe their parents didn’t even produce like normal people, but produced asexually. Or, something much more plausible: maybe even grew Yuu inside their lab.)

Not that they took any interest in trying to teach Yuu themselves. It was always expected of Yuu to want it, to see the beauty in their research the way that they did. When Yuu visited their lab- which was only when their parents trusted them to do something minor or to show them off at dumb corporate events- they were expected to listen and watch while silently taking notes. Any attempt to drive off course was met with pointed lectures about frivolous desires.

Yuu had tried to see what they saw.

They had tried every day, for years and years, to see what was so damn important and more interesting than their family. It feels like in exchange for trying, they lost something special. Yuu, who used to see the world as a colorful and vibrant place, began to only experience it from behind a window, or on a screen. The colors never reached them anymore.

Their entire life was written down for them, by the day, the hour, and the minute. Yuu would wake up at 4:30AM and would not be in bed until 10PM most days of the week. They were taught by the upmost researchers in the world about various subjects: Organic Chemistry, Physics C, Quantum Mechanics, Advanced Calculus, Introduction of Computational Complexity, Medical Biochemistry, Machine Learning, Engineering Thermodynamics- You name it, Yuu took it. Their parents boasted a need for understanding the fundamentals of the science their peers, future partners, and future enemies would be in charge of.

They sat down in their desk chair pretty much the entire day, on a video call with their professors, whom likely only took the job because Yuu's parents were willing to pay exorbitant amounts of money. (It wasn't like Yuu had a sparkling personality to make them a joy to teach.)

They also had multiple classes dedicated to learning from their parents’ textbooks.

No, not the ones that their parents learned from themselves, but the ones that they wrote. They had published around seventeen different books that Yuu had to memorize. And it was up to Yuu to understand their parents’ personal journals, which they had to read when alone and in a secure place because of the sensitive material in it.

That would be pretty much the only time that Yuu would hear their parents’ voices without there being an emergency, a legal need for it, or because they called first. Because if Yuu called about anything else, they would be ‘too busy.' Sometimes if Yuu got lucky, they would tell Yuu themselves to stop calling, rather than their secretary. But if Yuu called and asked questions about the contents of their research, suddenly, they had all the time in the world.

Yuu even attempted to learn multiple instruments; the reason being something about ‘needing to be good with their hands’.

They were absolutely awful at that.

Their fingers could never reach the piano keys correctly, they couldn't get over the pain for the violin and cello, and they have what their teacher called "the opposite of perfect pitch." Music lessons were scrapped when Yuu showed no promise for it, and they hadn't heard the end of griping about the money that was wasted on their tutors.

They did better with physical activity, however. Actually, if Yuu would let themselves brag, they would say that was what they were really meant to do with their life. It came with a thrill that Yuu couldn't experience any other time. Maybe it was the closest Yuu got to understanding what their parents could find so beautiful that it trumped everything else.

It was a passion of theirs. A secret, hidden dream stored away until Yuu was asleep.

It was the only time that Yuu could get outside of their house. It was a planned, single person activity, that Yuu couldn’t pick. But nonetheless, it felt nice to get up and do something other than read textbooks inside all day. Yuu spent half of every Saturday with their personal trainer, and the other half with either their track or figure skating coach depending on the week. They wanted to try out soccer, but their parents denied them.

They never admitted just how much fun these sports were, lest their parents think it was competing with their studies. If that had been taken away, Yuu wouldn't have known what to do with themselves.

Yuu learned everything they could, but…

They couldn’t see it.

Not once did they find what their parents were always looking for in those books. There were countless pages filled with the most love their parents could give, that Yuu had spent thousands of hours learning. When they close their eyes, they can reread the loops of their mother’s pen, the blocky capital letters of their father. They could recite the journals by memory, in order. They could rewrite them, if they wanted to.

But at the end of the day, those words were just paper and ink. Yuu was a little kid who wanted their mommy and daddy.

So… self sufficiency. The only lesson they ever truly needed.

When they weren’t with their parents’ driver or their assistant, they were, by all means, responsible for themself. When their friends ask where they learned to cook, how they know to sort mail, pay the bills, wash and fold and iron the laundry, fix the plumbing- why they always manage to keep up their grades on top of it… Yuu can just say:

“I learned it from my parents.”

They didn’t see the need for Yuu to have anyone to take care of them, if they could walk and talk and dial 911. So the nanny was fired when Yuu was around seven years old, and the housekeeper pulled back to only a once a week deep clean when Yuu was eight. All they needed was security for the house, to make sure no unsavory people tried to break in. Yuu could learn to cook with the help of a chef on Fridays, and why would they spend money hiring a maid if Yuu was there to pick up after themselves?

If Yuu truly needed the help, their parents’ A.I. program was all over the house, keeping tabs on Yuu’s movements throughout the day.

(Not that C.A.L.I. wasn’t fun to have around. Her name stood for “Computer Assisted Learning Intelligence” but Yuu always called her by her short name, Cali, which she seemed to like. Yuu could ask any question in the world and have a conversation with her so long as Yuu wasn't supposed to be doing their work.

Sure, Cali wasn’t actually real. And would immediately alert Yuu's parents if Yuu went AWOL or was hurt, or slacking on their work.

But Yuu could pretend. They never really lost that imagination, despite their father's warning.)

It really is their parents’ fault that Yuu had to take care of themselves at an early age. Which would make sense, and be normal, under any other circumstances. Would have been normal if it had been with their parents right besides them, helping them out every step of the way.

Would have been normal if one of them was watching Yuu jump into pools to learn to swim, anxiously biting their nails, while the other cheered them on. Would have been normal if Yuu learned to jump-rope while playing skipping games with them. Would have been normal if Yuu was outside climbing a tree-house or something.

But their parents weren’t there.

Yuu was on a literal different continent than their parents at all times. Yuu could only imagine what it would be like to have any of those things, could only see it from a TV screen or in a book they snuck in during study sessions. They had no one else their age to compare it to in real life, and just reading the words on the pages of parents in fiction that actually cared about their kids felt the same as reading a fantasy novel.

And one day it was no longer a choice that they made, to leave Yuu alone.

When their friends ask why Yuu is able to adapt and survive so well, Yuu can say:

“I learned it because of my parents.”

It is a roundabout way of blaming them for what happened. Because it will always be their fault that Yuu learned that ability, and not just because Yuu was trying to live long before that.

It was because of that damned research.

“Cloning magic is one of the most difficult magics to master.” Professor Galloway sets a single leaf down on his desk. The leaf is bright green, freshly picked from the gardens and full of life, still. “Does anyone know why?”

Yuu stares at that leaf, a small sinking feeling in their chest. No one in the class raises their hand, which is unusual for their Practical Magic class because the students actually like it. It’s probably the only subject that everyone pays attention for, even Yuu, who can’t do the practical part of magic.

But right now, their mind feels fuzzy. As it does whenever certain topics are mentioned.

“No one?” Galloway’s gaze turns to Yuu, usually his most active in student participation, only to find Yuu silent. “Alright, that’s okay. The reason that cloning magic is so difficult, is that the mage needs to understand and know the properties of what they are cloning. Take this leaf, for example.”

Galloway raises his pen over the leaf. It starts to shake as if stuck between winds, a light forming over it. Another light forms out of the figure like osmosis, and when Galloway stops the spell, an exact replica has formed next to it. He lifts it in his fingers to show the class.

“It took me three weeks to copy a leaf when I first started cloning magic, and that is because I did not know the property of it. And perhaps because my teacher was worried about retiring at the end of the year.”

He raises his pen once more over the first leaf as the class mumbles with amusement. When the light fades, the cloned leaf is nothing like the other. It is gray and yellow, punctures taken out of it that shows its withering life.

“This is what happens when you do not apply the full knowledge of the components to what you are cloning. In your textbooks, you will see a diagram of a leaf and the Lifeline that it is: a greenery plant.”

A Lifeline- something that all magic is based off of here in this world Yuu is now in. Though Yuu can not practice magic, they make up for it with studying. A “Lifeline” is sort of like a ‘soul’, where mages can feel different energies for different things, like people, plants, water, etc. Magic is mostly centered around the elements and their Lifelines, and Unique Magic is centered around the Lifeline of the person.

The other spells like summoning are based on-

“Intuition. We always come back to intuition, which is why I make it your vocabulary word every single section we learn. You could completely not understand what you are looking at- whether it be a plant that has animalistic characteristics, or a water nymph that is more person than water- and your magic, your intuition, will provide a spell for you. It is the same for cloning magic. You might not know what tree the leaf came from, but as long as you use your intuition to feel the Lifeline, you can copy it.”

“What about people, Professor?” Deuce raises his hand. “Our upperclassman-”

“Cater Diamond? Yes, he loved this lesson, as I recall.” Galloway muses, leaning back on his desk and playing with the copied green leaf. Yuu can’t stop staring at the wilted one. “People are different. Unless it is your Unique Magic, copying a person is impossible. A human Lifeline is far too distinct, with too many variables, for even your intuition to make up for. At worst, the spell would give out and deplete your energy for a few days. At best, you would get a doll that can not speak, and would disappear within hours.”

“Because you don’t know everything in that person’s head?” Someone asks. Galloway nods, smiling with satisfaction that his students are back to participating.

“Exactly, Normons. You can swear that you know someone better than they do themselves, but you would never truly know everything about them, not enough to clone. Cater Diamond’s Unique Magic came about because of his Lifeline, and he can only create copies of himself. Now,”

Galloway waves his pen in a flourish, and green leaves fly over the room, landing in front of students on their desks. Yuu is the only one left without a leaf. Grim paws at his, and before he can turn to Yuu, Galloway interrupts.

“Each of you will use these leafs in class. If you can create two perfect copies before class ends, I will give bonus points for the next pop quiz.” The room flutters with anticipation- and competition. “Yuu, could you come here?”

Yuu doesn’t participate in the practical part of practical magic, because that would be pointless. Instead, Yuu gets to learn more about the theory than the other students do, or they get sent on errands or to leave class early if they want.

They stare down at the decaying leaf as they approach Galloway’s desk, but they give their attention to him, trying to forget. Galloway gives them a vivacious grin, setting the leaf down and sitting in his chair. He leans back, observing their face for a moment before he speaks. He probably noticed Yuu’s unwillingness to talk earlier.

“Is there anything you would like to know about today’s lesson?”

The question segment. Where Yuu gets to learn more than the others, where they learn higher theory. Sometimes it would just be an earlier expansion into subjects they would learn this year, or it would be subjects for the second or third years.

Usually, Yuu would be eager to ask.

But the topic hits a little close to home this time.

Yuu’s mouth feels dry as they reply. “Actually, Professor, I’m finding it hard to separate magical cloning from my version.”

“Your version?” Galloway’s eyes almost light up. He isn’t just the Practical Magic professor, but he also handles the third year Magical Theory class. Which is sort of like this world’s version of a scientific researcher. He’s always wanting to know more about Yuu’s world, but Yuu is… closed off about it, if they can be. “You mean to tell me this is possible in your world? I thought there was no magic.”

“It’s not a magical application…” Yuu glances at the dead leaf. “I almost thought you meant that they had to know the chemical compositions of the leaf in order to clone it…”

“Chemical compositions… ah, those are the potions of your world. Yes, I recall.” Galloway nods sagely, the curls of his hair bouncing in his ponytail. “This has to do with your Periodic Table of Elements, right?”

“Yes, in a way…” Yuu grins lightly, but it falls fast.

“How does cloning in your world work, then?”

“We aren’t able to clone objects, for starters. We…”

Yuu thought they would be able to talk about it, but it is like a vice that grips at their throat. Their skin starts to itch, a warm anxiety spreading over their skin. It feels like the hot air of a jungle.

“Are you alright, Yuu?” Galloway’s eager smile has fallen. He eyes Yuu apprehensively, almost ready to stand at his desk. “You look pale.”

“…I’m not feeling so well.”

Galloway hesitates, an almost worried look crossing his face. Yuu spends more time learning from Galloway than they do the other teachers, and he hasn’t hesitated to tell them before that Yuu was their favorite. Yuu knows that he notices, because he’s seen Yuu freeze up like this before.

“You need to go lie down. Go see Dr. Baron- Er… Mr. S… No, Dr. Baron.” Galloway always forgets that Mr. S calls himself different names depending on the circumstance. When he is at the Mystery shop, he’s “Mr. S”, and when he’s acting as a school doctor, he’s “Dr. Baron”.

“Go see the doctor,” Galloway gives up trying to remember. “Get some rest before you head home today.”

“I’m-”

“-not fine.” Galloway finishes for Yuu. “Don’t worry about it. It happens to the best of us. Now, get some rest, you will feel better. Teacher knows best!”

The small flower on his lapel glitters in the sunlight.

-

Yuu had been stuck in that damn infirmary for way longer than they expected. Dr. Baron had been insistent that Yuu lay down until class was over, and they couldn’t even get up to check the clock. They were forced to stare at the shadows of the sun and guess the time that way.

Laying down had only made everything worse, in Yuu’s opinion. They weren’t getting rest, not like their teachers had hoped. Sitting still has never been Yuu’s strong suit, especially not now, so being forced to lay there with their thoughts as their only company?

It left Yuu with a lot of time on their hands, where all they could think about was the very thing that made them feel so sick.

The rain that poured down every night, the slick mud that they would have to pull their feet out of, that dried on their skin and flaked. They could remember the humidity that boiled them all day, only relieving at night. And they remember the relief would last only seconds, as they would be covered in mosquito bites.

They itched at their skin, forcing themselves to focus on the shadows of the sun as it drapes through the infirmary windows. But at some point, Yuu recalled using the sun to tell themselves how long they were there.

Days that turned into months. Months that turned into a year. A year that turned into three.

Just watching the sun tick by, the shadows creeping in and out of sight.

Knowing they were alone.

Except for the monsters that lurked in the jungle around them, the ones that hunted each other down, that embedded into Yuu “survival of the fittest.”

Yuu had jumped out of that cot and onto their feet as soon as Dr. Baron had started his sentence to let them leave. Moving would help, would keep their mind occupied. It always did, even back then. They first thought of Ace, Deuce, and Grim, and their incessant noise that would drive the bad memories away.

Then, they remembered the prefects meeting. Looking at their phone (provided by Cay-Cay Diamond), they could see they had a good twenty minutes before they had to be there. They could swing by their friends before heading to Crowley’s office.

Which leads to now.

“Yuu!”

An arm slings around their shoulders as they turn a corner, and Yuu relaxes under their touch almost instantly. Ace grins cheekily, shaking their shoulders playfully. “You left us, what gives!?”

“Privileges of not having magic, sorry not sorry.” Yuu replies smoothly. Ace lets out a dramatic sigh, letting go of their shoulders and groaning. Deuce and Grim are busy arguing with each other, about something stupid, probably.

Yuu doesn’t much care for what they are talking about, only focused on how the noise makes the tension release from their body.

“Booooo!” Ace gives Yuu a fat thumbs down. “No fair!”

“I think it’s plenty fair. What would I be doing with the leaf? Eating it?” Yuu points at Grim’s mouth, where four leaves are sticking out. “Apparently that was the point?”

“Grim got jealous that Deuce copied his leaf twice.” Ace explains, and Grim’s hackles raise.

“I did not!? I am not jealous! Deuce was braggin’ about it like a twerp, so I had to take ‘im down a notch, is all!” Grim finishes off the leaves, and Deuce glowers at him, swinging a kick at the cat that Grim jumps over.

“You’re such a brat, you know that?!”

“Grim, I thought we talked about this…” Yuu sighs, and Grim blanches.

“Yuu! You’re supposed to be on my side!”

“…Am I?” Yuu muses with a playful head tilt, a mischievous grin on their lips. “Alright, I wish I could stay, but duty calls.”

“You gotta use the bathroom?” Deuce’s brows furrow. Yuu shakes their head, wondering why that’s the first thing that pops into his mind.

“No, no. I have a prefects meeting I need to be at.” Yuu points behind them, starting to walk backwards. “Something about the festival coming up, and… uh, some mirror that someone found?”

Yuu can’t recall much about it. They had been knee deep in reading Magical Ethics and Governance when Azul brought it up to them. That essay was driving Yuu insane, but they got an A+, so the suffering was worth it.

“We’ll come too,” Ace follows Yuu with little time to decide. “We should get dinner after. Oh- Riddle already gave our study group the go ahead to stay at Ramshackle tonight.”

“He did?” Yuu had thought that Riddle would be against it, what with the festival coming up and the need for everyone to prepare. “I can’t believe it…”

“He’s been trying to be lenient about certain rules… which means adding a bunch of clauses to them.” Deuce shifts his bag on his shoulder. “So, we’re allowed to study and stay over, but only on certain days of the week, and only if we’re actually studying.”

“I guess that’s progress, huh?” Grim jumps into Yuu’s arms, settling down nice and cozy.

“Did you let Epel and Jack know?” Yuu scratches at Grim’s ears. “I think I have enough groceries to make dinner, actually, if anyone prefers that.”

“Whoa, really?” Ace latches onto their shoulder again, all pleasant smiles. “Have we ever told you how much we appreciate you?”

“Yeah, yeah,” Yuu shakes their head with a reluctant smile.

“I’ll text Epel and Jack.” Deuce chimes in, but he’s drowned out by Ace.

“Seriously, I grovel at your feet, oh Mighty Chef of the Ramshackle Kitchen.” Ace closes a feigning serious fist. “How could we ever survive without you?”

“I ask myself that every day.” Yuu shakes his arm off, much to Grim’s displeasure, but the cat remains in Yuu’s arms. Ever since it was discovered that Yuu knows how to cook, Ace and Deuce take every opportunity that is politely possible to get a plate.

Yuu did learn to cook from a popular chef, so they can’t say that they blame ADeuce for that.

“I don’t want them there.” Grim states firmly.

“Shut it, rat!”

“I am not a rat!”

Of course, Grim doesn’t like sharing.

Yuu looks out the window as they walk towards the classroom they use for prefect meetings. The sun is going to set in an hour.

It used to be Yuu’s least favorite time of day. The night was worse than the day for them just a few months ago, but now… Now, this was the time of day where Yuu got to spend the most time with their friends. Dinner time, where they can talk about their days and complain about the classes, and then they hang out wherever they can, or study together. Sometimes their friends stick around a little longer than they should, and Yuu never turns them away because it’s nice to have them there.

And it doesn’t even end up feeling like a dream anymore. Not with Grim sleeping on their pillow, snoring away, or when Yuu can talk to the ghosts and realize they aren’t alone even at night. When night falls now, Yuu doesn’t have to worry about a monster lurking in the shadows, watching and waiting for the perfect time to strike.

“What are you grinning for?” Ace pouts, catching Yuu’s attention.

“Huh?”

“Oh, you’re just lost in thought again.” Ace lets go of whatever frustration had been ailing him. “I thought you were laughing at Grim calling me a name.”

“I probably would have if I had noticed.”

“Why do you hate me!?”

All in jest, of course. They’re used to Ace’s dramatics by now, used to seeing Deuce roll his eyes or scoff at Ace and Grim while trying to cover up a laugh. Used to feeling safe during the day.

Finally.

“What are you two squalling about so loudly in the halls?” A familiar voice chides at them as they near the classroom. Riddle is standing in the doorway, his arms crossed and tapping light fingers impatiently. He narrows his eyes at Ace. “Fix your collar now or you’re cleaning the kitchen later.”

Ace immediately fixes his collar, grimacing at the thought. Deuce tries to double check his uniform without Riddle noticing, but Riddle seemingly finds nothing wrong with him, because he passes his gaze over to Yuu.

His face softens, not nearly as sharp as he is with his cards. “Yuu, I heard you went to the infirmary. Are you alright?”

Yuu blinks at him as the other three turn to them in surprise. “I- who told you that?”

“Professor Galloway informed me when I asked about your whereabouts. I was going to remind you about the meeting. If you aren’t feeling well, then you should head back to Ramshackle to lie down. I wouldn’t want to push you unnecessarily.”

“You went to the infirmary?” Deuce questions, his brows furrowing. “Are you sick?”

“You didn’t tell us that’s why you left class.” Ace was suspicious.

“I’m alright.” Yuu is met with doubtful looks from all. “Seriously. I just needed a nap, I lost track of time while reading last night.”

Grim nods as if that explains it all, but that’s because it was the truth, partly. Yuu did stay up late reading and they were almost late to class for it.

Yuu knows they have a tendency to downplay sickness or injury… maybe even hide it. They aren’t used to people actually caring about it. They had an upbringing much like Riddle, who is the only person to know a little about that. They had easily related to Riddle when he was going through his overblot. That meant when Yuu was sick, they were told to just push through it and study anyways, so as not to fall behind.

But here is different. If Yuu is sick, their friends can easily detect it, and Yuu is always forced back to Ramshackle to get rest, with at least one friend on standby to make sure they stay resting.

But since that won’t help Yuu right now, they hope that doesn’t become the case.

Their friends accept the answer because of Grim’s nod. He of all people could verify the story, and Yuu is feeling better now.

“Alright, I’m glad.” Riddle grins. “The others are getting everything sorted out inside. You three,” Riddle glances at the others, who go stiff under his eyes. “-stay out here. I can see you’re waiting for Yuu to be done, and then you’re going to study, correct?”

“Yes, prefect.” Deuce almost salutes- almost, because they (including Riddle) had talked to him about it.

“I’ll be feeding them too.” Yuu assures. “So they’re not missing a good dinner, either.”

Riddle nods with satisfaction, trusting Yuu to get this done. He opens the door for them with a small grin. “After you then, Yuu.”

Yuu lets Grim jump out of their arms and walks inside, scanning to see who all was here. Vil and Azul are setting out boxes of papers and chatting idly about their day next to a sleeping Leona. Kalim is laughing at a video that Idia is showing on his phone screen. Idia is not physically in person, he’s on the phone, but it counts as an attendance, apparently.

The only one not in attendance is Malleus. Yuu opens their mouth-

“He was busy.” Riddle slides into the seat next to Yuu, setting his elbows on the table to cross his fingers together. Yuu is almost shocked that he knew what Yuu was about to say. “I tried to contact him through Lillia, as I could not find him in his classroom. Malleus and the other Diasomnia students are visiting Briar Valley for the weekend.”

Yuu nods, glad for that.

Ever since the the SDC, Yuu has been trying to make it a point for Malleus to get more friends other than them. They know exactly what it’s like to have no friends, and finding out Malleus really was the guy that everyone avoids- when he is arguably one of their closest friends at that point because he’s so nice- broke their heart.

It’s nice that everyone was listening to them and making it a point to invite him.

“Alright, everyone pass these down. Idia, we emailed the documents to you, since you refuse to come in person.” Vil starts sending papers down the table, side eyeing the phone.

“Proving that this could have been an email.”

“We emailed the documents, not everything that we’re going to discuss.” Riddle chides at him. “Firstly, we need to have everyone here and their vice-prefect sign off on the booths that any of your students will be setting up.”

They start on the festival, something that starts right before that -game the school plays against Royal Academy at the end of the year. Yuu doesn’t have to do much, technically, so they volunteer to do what isn’t dorm-oriented. Azul takes on just as much as Yuu, volunteering to work with them at any chance he could get.

They work their way through most of the events fairly quick, and Yuu attributes that to it being dinner time soon. Riddle and Vil do not like to miss their schedules, whereas Leona doesn’t like to skip a meal.

Leona’s tail flicks with irritation, brushing against Yuu’s ankle. He’s slumped in his seat, staring at the paper as if it personally was keeping him from eating. Yuu digs into their pocket, seeking to avoid bloodshed when they see Leona’s eye twitch as Riddle asks about the color of the banners.

They pull out a strawberry candy, holding their palm up underneath the table just for Leona to see. They keep looking at the paper, trying not to hint to the others that Leona was getting candy and they weren’t- actually, they’re just trying to avoid Kalim seeing.

Leona scoffs under his breath, but he takes the candy without a word. Yuu locks eyes with Azul next to Leona, who had caught the action. He smiles pleasantly, holding out his hand in Leona’s space.

Leona grumbles threateningly as Yuu gives in and hands Azul the candy.

“It’s getting late. We can send the rest of this in an email.” Riddle says, and Idia makes a noise over his call.

“Dude.”

“On to the next and last subject,” Riddle glances at the clock on the wall, clicking his tongue when he sees it’s getting close to dinner time. Leona growls, and Kalim squints at him from across the table.

“Where’d you get candy?” He looks to Azul, who turned his head away. “Gasp! Traitors!”

“Not important, Kalim.” Riddle fusses and Leona smirks at Kalim. “While cleaning out an unused classroom, getting ready for the festival, one of the students from Heartslayabul found this Mirror.”

Riddle reaches down to pick up a box, which has a white sheet placed over it. He sets it very carefully on the table, and is careful to pick up the mirror with the sheet still on, as if touching it could be a problem. He sets it down on the table, pulling the sheet off so everyone can see it.

It is a free-standing mirror in a golden frame, not very tall but with a big presence. The frame is very detailed, wrapped like rope with flowers sticking out of the top, bottom, and middle. It all surrounds not a regular mirror, but a black screen, which looks strikingly similar to the Mirror in the Mirror Hall, the one that sorted them at orientation.

“Oh, so it’s a capital Mirror.” Yuu comments.

“What?” Azul raises a brow at them.

“There’s a mirror, and then there’s a Mirror.”

“Oh, I hear the difference!” Kalim points at Yuu. “Clever!”

“I don’t hear a difference.” Idia chimes in.

“This is a Speculum Profundissimae Timorem, is it not?” Vil leans back in his chair, crossing his arms and his nose wrinkling with distaste. The bunch of fancy words- or, as Yuu calls it, “latin” (that doesn’t exist in Twisted Wonderland, but they use all the damn time)- leads Yuu to believe that whatever the case, Vil is not a fan, so Yuu shouldn’t be either. Which is always the case when it comes to magic items that people find.

“Yes. We need to dispose of it, or find somewhere to store it, that won’t be easily accessed by a student.”

“Wait, freshman here,” Yuu raises their hand. “What is this? It looks like the Mirror, but is it dangerous or something?”

“Yes, it is.” Riddle replies. He’s trying not to stand too close to the Mirror. “The Timorem is related to the Mirror’s magic, but it is far less useful and much more dangerous. Like the Mirror, it can see into someone’s Lifeline or soul, their mind, maybe.”

“Maybe?”

“No one wants to study it because it’s creepy.” Leona leans on his hand.

“Suuuuuper creepy!” Kalim adds, shivering. “It sees your darkest fears and uses it against you!”

“Not… exactly.” Azul squints at Kalim, then turns to Yuu. “The Timorem knows your worst fears, yes, and can make you live them. That, or it can force you to stay in a traumatic event, and feeds off of the fear once it has you captured.”

“…What?” Yuu’s gaze locks onto the Timorem. That tiny little thing could do something that terrible?

Yuu should have expected that, maybe. This new world is full of terrible magic items like this. But in particular, Yuu feels their blood run cold at the thought of it. It reminded them of a venus fly trap. It sits there, quite pretty in the light, appearing harmless. But it is awaiting you to get too close, to trap you in its jaws.

Yuu inches further away from the Mirror, their stomach cold as ice. If it made you relive… Well, that wouldn’t be good.

“How does it…?”

“It traps you inside the Mirror.” Vil answers, also not wanting to look directly at the Mirror. “If you touch it directly, or really, just stand too close or look too long, it will act. You cannot get out without someone on the outside sinking it inside of a potion called the ‘Reversus ad Vitam’ for a couple hours, and even then, the potion itself needs to boil for three hours before you can soak the Mirror. That leaves you with at least six hours in your own personal living nightmare. Many people can die.”

“Why is this thing even on campus? What is wrong with this place?” Yuu can not stand that this magical world doesn’t have more boundaries on what is and isn’t chill to keep around or do.

“I have no idea, but Crowley has tasked us with taking care of it. So we need to decide where to keep it until we can pass it off to someone.” Riddle urges, glancing again at the clock. That explains why a bunch of students are on ‘death control’ duty. “Heartslayabul has far too many students for us to take it.”

“My students are too dumb.” Leona puts bluntly. “They would take it as a dare.”

“Would the Headmage be offering any gifts to the dorm that takes it?” Azul’s grin makes Yuu reconsider being his friend, if for a split second. To think he’d go that far for a deal?

“I don’t know.” Riddle answers.

“Put me as a maybe.”

“We have a bunch of places we could-”

“No.” Riddle interrupts Kalim, who frowns. Riddle, sensing Yuu’s disapproving look, searches for a reason. “I mean… You have so many valuables to take care of already, that it could get lost.”

“Oh…” Kalim nods to himself, taking that answer. “It’s also super creepy and I don’t want it.”

“Good to know.”

“Pomefiore is hosting an event in our dorm for the festival next week. If we can’t get someone to take it before then, then anyone could stumble across it.” Vil shakes his head. It sounds like an excuse, because Yuu has heard him talk about a vault in Pomefiore before.

“I’m a no.”

“Any reason?” Riddle holds back a rude remark to Idia.

“… I don’t want to.”

“Not a valid reason.”

“Kalim used it.”

“I am putting you as a maybe.” Riddle ignores Idia’s complaint. “Perhaps Diasomnia could, as I doubt anyone would dare to touch their things, but they are in Briar Valley all weekend…”

All eyes turn on Yuu, who instantly shakes their head. “Nope.”

“Your dorm has the least amount of people in it.”

“Are you kidding? That thing within the vicinity of the ghosts or Grim would mean certain death before midnight tonight. Absolutely not. I refuse.” Yuu crosses their arms, and looks at the clock above them. “You guys got this, right? It’s dinner time.”

“No it’s not-” Azul tries, but Yuu is already standing up.

“I’m making my own dinner for study group, so I’m including prep time. Good luck with the Mirror of Death.” Yuu hurries towards the door, all too eager to get away from the Mirror.

As they swing the door open, they are bombarded by shouts.

“Tator tots and hashbrowns are not the same thing, you moron!” Deuce hits his head with his hands.

“They are to! Just look at em! They’re made of the same ingredients!”

“They’re prepared differently!” Ace argues, his face red, which tells Yuu this didn’t start on this topic. “Poboys are different from sandwiches!”

“Not in my world!”

“Stop shouting, you fools.” Riddle’s stern voice cuts them off. Deuce visibly pales when he sees the door is open. Riddle sighs greatly as Grim continues to shout at Ace, unaware that Riddle had spoken at all.

“Just like all noodles are the same!”

“No, no no no-” Ace wags a finger at him, shaking his head vehemently. “Wrong. Wrong wrong wrong wrong-”

“You can’t just repeat no and wrong and that be your argument!”

“I can too when you’re wrong-”

“Guys!” Yuu claps in Ace’s ear, startling him. “Who’s hungry?”

“Me! Me!” Grim jumps up in the air. “I’m fucking starving!”

“Grim!” Riddle turns on his heel. “Watch your language! I have half a mind to collar you right now for that!”

Only, Yuu doesn’t see Grim’s eyes go wide, nor do they notice that Riddle starts walking closer, fussing at Grim. What they see is the Timorem begin shaking on the table.

And it starts to tip over.

It falls so slow, but Yuu feels slower. They take only one step forward, their heart sinking to the ground as they watch the Timorem fall over the side. Leona jumps to his feet at the same time as Azul, both of them scrambling to get as far away from it as they can.

Kalim’s jaw drops, frozen still as the Timorem hits the ground. Vil gets to his feet next, knocking the chair over, which clatters to the ground, but Yuu doesn’t hear it. Instead, all they can hear is the sickening crack as the Timorem’s face breaks.

The shards split across the ground, a violent whip of cold wind pulling everyone forwards. Yuu tries to grab the doorway, but they slip when it feels like someone yanks at their ankle. They slam to the ground, landing on their wrist wrong. Something is dragging them across the floor, closer to the Timorem, their vision grows dark-

-

Hot, humid air. It sticks to their skin like a wet blanket. Beads of sweat start to form on their neck as they stare up at the sky. They lay on their back, hard gravel underneath them. Dark clouds are looming above them in the sky, almost circling in on them. Like they’re the center that the clouds need to get to.

Everything feels far away.

Fuzzy.

Disconnected.

Yuu can hear their breath so clearly as they breathe in slowly. They sit up from the ground in slow motion, a ringing in their ears.

They have to blink away the blurry feeling in their eyes. As everything becomes more sharp- too sharp, really, why is that?- Yuu can feel their heart racing in their chest.

They can hear their heart racing in their chest.

Their hands tremble as they press them onto the gravel. They feel an overwhelming sense of emptiness as they take in exactly where they are.

Overturned tables and chairs that had been set out for guests around the restaurants. The shattered glass windows of stores that had blood on them at one point, only noticeable because of the stained wood and concrete beneath it. The rain had washed away everything else.

Palm trees.

Yuu watches them sway in the breeze of the coming storm.

How they hate palm trees.

Looming green mountains, a towering pyramid building with the windows in pieces. Kiosks that had been pushed to the side, scratching the concrete ground.

Yuu feels their breaths come quicker, thinner. They stare up at the mountains, filled with a terror so great that they feel like their heart is about to stop. Hot, stinging tears fill their eyes, and they fall when Yuu looks at the ground beneath their hands.

The world is spinning too fast.

“…Where are we?” Someone groans from beside Yuu. They feel far away, even though they are right. next to them.

“Some type of abandoned theme park?” Another replies. They offer a hand to the person next to Yuu, pulling them up from the ground.

“Who all is here?” A sharp voice is trying to do damage control. “Was everyone sucked in?”

“I think so… besides Idia, looks like.”

“He’s going to lord this over our heads.”

“Does anyone recognize this place?” Another asks. “We all got pulled into the same… memory? Nightmare? What do we call it?”

“Mind-space, maybe? Like a dream spell?”

“What the hell is going on!?”

“Yeah, what he said! What is happening?”

“It’s difficult to explain, just hold on.”

“Yeah, wait until we figure out who’s mind-space we’re in, morons.” A drawling voice is standing next to Yuu. “Hey, get up.”

Yuu doesn’t know if the person is talking to them or not, but they can’t move even if they are. Yuu feels locked. It’s all they can do to try and keep their breathing even. All they can do to not scream.

Or maybe they can’t scream at all. Maybe their voice is too gone for that.

“Yuu?”

Someone bends down next to them, a concerned hand falling on their shoulder. They rub a circle into their back, dropping their voice low so only Yuu can hear them. “Yuu, it is going to be alright. I need you to take deep breaths.”

“So this is Yuu’s mind-space?” Someone asks, and there’s shuffling feet. “You’re scared of abandoned theme parks? I mean, I get it. They’re not my favorite place in the world either.”

“Kalim, not helpful.”

“I dunno, I think it is.”

“What’s this about being afraid?”

“Yuu, can I see your wrist?” The voice prods, gently reaching towards Yuu’s left wrist. Yuu doesn’t react, which allows manicured nails to pick up their hand from the ground. Vil tsks at the redness. “This isn’t good. I think it’s just a sprain, but it’s going to hurt if we don’t figure out how to treat this.”

Yuu could care less about a damned sprained wrist. They can hear mumbles of explanations to the confused voices of the three who hadn’t been in the room earlier.

“Yuu,” Vil reaches up to cup their cheek with his finger-tips, gently guiding their face up to look at him. “It is going to be okay. We are here also, you are not alone. Alright?”

Right.

Right, he’s right.

Yuu isn’t alone right now. And- And this isn’t actually the park. Yuu isn’t really back there, even though it feels so… So real. It can’t be the same place they escaped from, because that isn’t what the Timorem does.

It’s just a bad memory.

But…

“Yuu?” Vil prompts for a reply.

Yuu nods their head, taking a deep breath. They can’t stop the trembling in their hands, or the lump that forms in their throat. But they feel less inclined to panic. Now, they’re left with an overwhelming urge to get sick.

“Good, good.” Vil squeezes their shoulder, helping Yuu sit up properly on the ground. Yuu glances over their shoulder to see everyone in a circle farther back. the upperclassmen look serious, checking every few seconds to see what Vil and Yuu are doing.

“…It isn’t safe here.” Yuu whispers, finally finding their voice. They look to their left, down the side they know harbors one of the worst horrors.

“So you recognize this place?”

Yuu nods, attempting to stand up from the ground with only one good hand. Vil helps them, and Yuu hurries over to one of the shops on the side. They go through the open window, searching for anything that they can use.

They have no idea how magic is going to react in this place, nor do they know if they can die like they can in a real space. Is this just a dream, where nothing can hurt them, or is the Timorem even worse than it sounds? If they can get hurt…

It’s up to Yuu to keep them from getting injured.

“Yuu, what are you doing?”

Yuu kicks around the debris and knocked over shelves, their ears keenly aware of everything around them. When they first came through here, they had seen two crowbars underneath the cashier’s register- for who knows why- and had taken one as a decent self defense weapon for the smaller ones.

They lean over the counter, pulling open the cabinet. Only one crowbar is left. When Yuu pulls it out, it’s lighter than they remember it had been when they first picked it up. Either Yuu got used to carrying it around, or this mind-scape doesn’t have everything right.

“What in the world is that for?” Vil’s eyes widen when Yuu scrambles out of the shop. There hadn’t been any food left on the shelves in that one, but across the street…

“Hold this.”

Yuu shoves the crowbar into Vil’s hands, causing the boy to grimace with disgust, but he holds onto it. The others had started to notice Yuu was hurrying around, and when they ask what for, Vil replies, “I have no idea.”

Yuu reaches for a backpack on the ground. It’s empty and still has the price tag on. Yuu rips it off so that it can’t get caught on something- they learned that the hard way- and goes towards the food shelves. They start dumping the cans inside their bag first- canned peaches, beans, tuna, chicken, soups. Then they start grabbing bags of sunflower seeds, nuts, oats, and granola.

It’s too loud to carry, so Yuu walks over to the shirt displays. They rip them off the hangars, stuffing them one by one inside the bag, weaving through the cans to keep them from clanking together. They test it a couple times, and when it’s good to go, they zip up the bag and leave the second store.

“Yuu, care to explain at all?” Ace tries peeking into the bag as Yuu swings it over their shoulder. “What is this place?”

“Rule one: no screaming or loud noises.” Yuu starts clicking the straps on tighter to their shoulders, wincing at the pain in their wrist. “Rule two: keep your head on a swivel, and never talk over a whisper.”

“What?” Deuce pales in the face, turning his head over to the side and back again.

“I-Is this, like-” Azul pauses when he sees Yuu’s gaze snap on him. He lowers his voice into a whisper. “Are you going to tell us what is going on?”

“Rule three: I know more than you do.” Yuu puts bluntly, taking the crowbar from Vil, who gladly hands it over. He wipes his hand on Leona’s sleeve. “You don’t do anything without clearing it with me. You follow me, both when I tell you to do something and when we run.”

“Run?” Kalim repeats.

“Yuu, just tell us what this place is.” Riddle is staring at the crowbar as if Yuu was going to use it on one of them.

“Rule four: forget everything you know about the monsters in your world.” Yuu states firmly- more stern than they’ve ever been with any of them. “They’re nothing now. They’re like babies. I’m not sure, but your magic might do just diddly squat for usefulness.”

“I hardly doubt-”

“What did I say rule three was?” Yuu interrupts Azul.

“…You know more than we do.”

“Rule five: Running is top priority. We do not fight unless we absolutely have to. You might think you’re on top of the food chain, or that you’re smarter. You aren’t. You never will be, and you should know that right now.”

“Yuu-”

“Does everyone understand the rules?” Yuu makes sure to make eye contact with every single one of them, especially Grim. Yuu kneels down and forces him to make eye contact. “I’m not fucking around. This isn’t like your world. You will die if you do anything I told you not to.”

“We get it already!” Grim forces Yuu’s hand away from his face. “Just explain!”

“Not here.” Yuu gets up, looking to their right. “We’re too exposed.”

“Exposed?”

“Yeah.” Is all Yuu replies with as they start down to the left. They know exactly where to get to, but it’s quite a way away from here. “We’re in Roberta’s territory.”

“…I can’t tell whether that is a joke or not.” Kalim tries to catch up with Yuu. “Who’s Roberta?”

The ground shakes underneath Yuu’s feet.

Of course, their first instinct should be to run. It used to be to run- to find the closest way out and not look back.

But everything in their body freezes, as Yuu feels that ground tremble underneath those giant feet. They shake it off when they hear Grim whine lowly, seeing his ears press flat back on his head. Perhaps it’s his monster instincts that tell him: a hunter is coming.

Yuu dodges into the nearest alleyway, getting low to the ground as they pull Kalim behind them. He falls to the ground when Yuu unceremoniously pushes him there, and when he goes to speak, Yuu slaps a hand over his lips.

The others, to their credit, fall suit with Yuu just as their rule had stated. They hide in a line in the alley, getting low to the ground. Yuu peeks around the corner as they hold onto Kalim, who goes still when the others finally feel the shaking.

Thump.

Thump.

THUMP.

THUMP.

The windows and kiosks shake with the footsteps. Yuu’s blood runs cold and they lean their head back, taking a silent but deep breath to steel themself. They watch as the muscular maw of the monster rounds the corner first, exiting the paddock that she calls her nest.

Eight tons of the ancient monster shakes the Visitor’s Center. Her eyes are set forward, away from their hidden alley. She flexes her jaw open to shake her head, revealing the rows of near twelve-inch sized teeth. It was less of a sound that Yuu could hear, and more that they could feel. The air vibrates as she booms, the sound echoing and settling into Yuu’s bones. As close as she is, they could hear the whistling of air, and the whooshing of her humongous tail.

She stomps past them, sniffing the air and bellowing to herself darkly. She tilts her head slightly to the side, listening, thinking to herself... Yuu has always entertained the idea that she could hear their heartbeats. If she really could, then they suppose that she would just attack them, but it doesn't stop them from worrying she could. The clicking noise moves with her as she drags the giant claws of her feet past their alley, one agonizing step at a time. She’s making her way towards the opposite direction Yuu is taking them, which settles Yuu’s nerves if only for a moment.

But the same can’t be said for their companions. As the monster makes its way down the street, Yuu turns to see their reactions, if they could run after that.

They have never seen their upperclassmen so shaken to their core- Ace, Deuce, and Grim, yes, plenty of times. But none of them like this. Even after an overblot, Yuu can say that the fear gripping them was enough that they might not be able to move, as Yuu worried.

Riddle was holding Grim tightly against his chest, staring at where the monster had just walked away from. Ace and Deuce were holding onto each other, Vil is trying to stop the shaking in his hands. Azul gulps, looking down at the ground as if hoping it would swallow him up.

Leona’s ears were pressed down, his face more pale than before and sweat beading on his brow. And beneath Yuu’s hand, Kalim had gone as still as a statue, barely even daring to breathe as he leans farther back into Yuu.

Monsters like these don’t exist in their world. Yuu had searched and searched, believe that. They wanted to make sure that nothing like this could happen to them there, that they had nothing to worry about.

The textbooks told them that their ancient monsters had been huge, great beings, almost like gods. But now, the monsters appear like Grim, like the Phantoms. The closest they could get to an old god was Malleus, and his dragon form. Nothing in their world compares- it dulls when set next to the monster they had just seen.

And there are more.

“What… was that?” Ace had his eyes set on Yuu, who slowly lets go of Kalim. His voice is not even a whisper, but a breath.

Yuu can feel all of their eyes on them.

“That was Roberta.”