Chapter Text
“...Hanafuda, why do you have two children with you?”
Tiny Ulti looked up and up and up at the massive shadow of a man her father called Captain, eyes wide as plates. He was huge. He filled up the room with his mere presence. He looked like... like a demon king from one of those fairy tale books the teachers gave the other kids to read at the Marine-base school. Should she be scared?
He looked at her with somewhat bleary confusion, puzzlement, and mild consternation. The teachers at the school would have been angry about it. They would have lectured that children were a gift to the world and should be given warmth, welcome and support no matter what the adults were going through.
He didn't have their lying eyes and fake smile.
Tiny Ulti decided that made him trustworthy.
“They're mine, Captain Kaido.” Hanafuda explained, shifting awkwardly from foot to foot. “Ulti and Page.” He held them out with pride.
“Oh, right. Your letters mentioned them. ...But why are they here?” The demon king repeated, leaning back slightly as if trying to avoid the aura the two children were projecting. “You had accommodations at that Marine Island, you said you didn't think their mother would want them raised here-”
“Neria left me and them,” Hanafuda said simply. “The marines pressured and pushed her into it. And they were hostile to my children from the start. That place is no good for them, so I'm asking you – please, Captain, take them in and keep them safe.”
“...Flighty woman,” The demon king muttered in contempt. “Bet they didn't have to try all that hard.” Then he eyeballed Tiny Ulti and Page again like he was afraid they were going to bite him. It was kinda funny, really. She liked the faces he made. “I'm not exactly running a comfortable boarding house in Onigashima. Can't promise it'll be better for them.”
“You'll keep them safe.” Hanafuda responded without hesitation. “I trust you, Captain. Please. You're my last hope.”
The great angel who sat somewhat to the demon king's left became animated then, turning towards the man on the throne. “Why not, Kaido? We already have Bernadetta, her friends, and Yamato.” He pointed out in a quiet voice. “What's two more children? The maids will take care of them.”
The demon king dithered for a minute, and Tiny Ulti thought that perhaps she should do something, say something to help convince him. Drawing pictures and trying to play with the other kids and being a good student had gotten her nothing. But he didn't have their lying eyes. So maybe she could convince him.
Tiny Ulti sucked in the deepest breath she could muster, pinwheeled her arms and did her best imitation of a mighty roar. Like an evil dragon would! She could be his evil dragon if he'd take her into his court, if he wanted her and Pay-Pay, he wouldn't regret it.
The adults all gawked at her. She hadn't quite managed to make a 'mighty roar', of course, her little vocal chords being what they were, but her intention was clear. Pay-Pay made a nervous noise, squeezing her hand and braced for a bad reaction.
Instead after staring for a long moment, the demon king laughed. “Hah! Well, don't you have spirit?” He asked her. “Never mind my mumbling, Hanafuda. Clearly they'll fit in just fine. Get 'em set up in your room in Onigashima and alert the maids looking after the other kids that they've got two more on the roster.”
Hanafuda beamed. “Thank you so much.”
Ulti ran as fast as she could. And she might not be as fast as Bernadetta, but give her the chance to build up a head of steam and she could outrace plenty of her comrades! She'd put her all into making herself strong, fast, adaptable, the best fighter ever since she was a kid. She'd practised sprinting with Bern before she even got her devil fruit!
And running – running gave vent to her emotions and she can't punch anyone and this was just going to have to do.
Why did he have to say sorry? Why did he have to feel bad?! Why?!
Nobody who said nice things actually meant them! ...That's what Ulti had believed for a long time, anyway.
Her father... he did the best that he could without really understanding what exactly children needed. He loved them, he doted on them, and he was proud of them... when he was around. It wasn't that bad when their mother was present, part of their lives; Ulti's memories of her are a little foggy now, but she still remembers what the woman looked like and how she used to smile and play with them all the time.
But they'd lived in that Marine base.
Ulti swerved around a corner, jumped over a group of startled Fishmen – Mer, MER, their tribe's real name was the Mer and Ulti wouldn't have cared about accidentally using a slur-derived name a year ago but she also would have thought that no one did.
It was another one of those things that everyone said was important, that they cared about, that the right way to treat someone was to use their proper name; then as soon as one person or another looked away, they'd be spitting it hatefully at their backs.
Ulti ran faster. She doesn't remember any of the city layout, but if she runs in random directions long enough she's bound to find her way out – or at least to a big empty park she could hide away and sulk in until she worked all these stupid feelings out.
She can't hit anyone. This was important. It wasn't a lying eyes thing, it was probably the right thing to do and she... wanted to abide by that. When no one was performing she could feel the real weight of goodness and being good and what it did to you. It made life brighter and better and she'd secretly wanted it, but never expected it, because of that island.
Hanafuda had always been a double-agent in the World Government in one way or another. He was a clever man, a charismatic one, he was good at getting people to like him and trust him, and his disdain for the government wasn't on such a tight hair trigger that he couldn't interact with them. Initially he used this to steal from the Navy, obstruct them and otherwise pass information to Kaido; then they approached him about taking a Warlord position to get him under control.
He conferred with Kaido, who laughed when he heard that and green lit Hanafuda's plan to accept it and continue to work for him regardless. With much more free reign and government backing making his various missions – chief amongst them seeking out Ancient Zoan fruits – vastly easier, Hanafuda had parked himself and his crew on a Marine Base Island to take advantage of the accommodations and give his wife, Neria, a place to raise Ulti and Page in peace.
He wasn't around much. His missions meant he was often gone for weeks, even months at a time. And while he was gone, little Ulti and eventually Page were enrolled by a well meaning Neria in the Navy-funded school.
Well meaning, but foolish.
Ulti climbed up onto a building roof so she'd stop nearly running people over and began hopping from house to house. The increased elevation allowed her to finally spot a decent-sized water park and she made a beeline for it. Vaguely she could sense Page following her and she wanted to lose him if she could.
Ulti spent her time in that school watching other children be loved, praised, treated well, taught good values and given good lessons on how to treat other people by the teachers. ...Ulti and Page were given those lessons too, but it was made clear swiftly that everyone else was exempted from giving that good treatment to them too.
The teacher didn't smile when Ulti offered her the drawing she'd put together for class, beaming with pride, hoping it would get praised like the rest of the students. “...You colored mostly within the lines, but the top is a mess,” she said. “Is this meant to be a sun or a burning skull? It's terribly frightful.”
Ulti shrank down, confused and hurt by the reaction. “It-it's a sun!”
“I see.” The teacher's face softened a little then, and she gave her a more kind look. Even to Ulti, young as she was, it looked strained. “Did your father help you draw this?”
“N-No...”
“Well, that's good work for a solo effort, so I expect you'll do better next time.” The teacher said.
No sticker. No smile. No words of encouragement. The other students snickered at her and unlike when they laughed at the sick boy, the teacher didn't so much as bat an eye. Ulti fled the room as soon as she could to go to her mother and cry.
It was dumb that Portgas apologizing, of all things, should be driving her this crazy. Wasn't it? Who got mad at a person for actually saying sorry? Wasn't that what she'd wanted, some admission of guilt and responsibility?
Not really. She'd wanted a fight and she hadn't trusted anyone to be actually sorry since she was little. When you got violent with people, they couldn't lie to you or hold anything over you. When people feared you, they didn't say things no one actually believed and acknowledged reality.
This was how Ulti had parsed things, anyway. It was hard for a child to understand why she was treated so differently by the teachers who claimed to care about children, who were inspired by justice and wanted to pass down good morals to the next generation. They said that to her face while pushing her away, calling her a pirate's child, and making it clear the golden rule applied to everyone right up until it didn't.
They took her mother away. Ulti had listened by the wall during parent-teacher meetings and had heard some of the things they said. All the mothers in the class ganging up on Neria, browbeating her with sugary smiles and words of concern and the piety of priests. She'd heard, and she'd seen how the light went out of Neria and how she'd spend time staring blankly at the earrings Hanafuda had given her like she no longer remembered how she'd ended up with them.
Then one day she left the house and never came back.
Ulti didn't know exactly what happened. Maybe she'd left willingly, maybe the Marines had gaslit her into agreeing to something and forcibly dragged her away when she changed her mind; but it solidified her understanding of the world when her father came back and was utterly devastated by her absence.
People talked about goodness and treating each other well and moral righteousness, but not a single one of them actually believed what they said. They said it because the gods were watching and maybe they hoped that if they said it enough times, said gods would be fooled into thinking they were sincere. When people invoked righteousness, it was so they could smile in your face while they stabbed you in the back.
Ulti was little, her brother's protector, when she vowed she would never be hurt by those kinds of people and their lying eyes ever again.
Onigashima wasn't a great place for a child. Yes, they had Bernadetta and the maids and the warning dropped by Alber that no attacks on the children would be tolerated. They even played with Yamato for a while, but when Yam-Yam started talking like Oden – about honor and justice and stuff – well, it went up Ulti's nose in the worst way possible.
Someone she'd hoped would be a friend was spouting all that stuff that those liars did! Was Yamato planning on stabbing her and Pay-Pay in the back, too, for being dirty children of a pirate? Ulti reacted in the way she'd learned to in order to get people to be honest with her – with violence – and... well.
Now she knew Yamato well and realized that despite her fears, Yam-Yam was never ever going to do something like that. So. Maybe Yamato wouldn't have wanted to be her friend since Ulti was very much on her father and Kaido's side, but... maybe her anger took that friendship away from both of them.
Ulti crashed down into the park and ran along the flowerbeds until she found a great big tree to throw herself underneath, burying her face in her knees and screaming in frustrated upset, yanking on her hair with both hands.
Her father loved her and Page.
He wasn't often around, didn't change the environment of Onigashima or wonder if it was healthy for his kids, but when he was there he would train them personally, praise their accomplishments and bring them presents. When Ulti stole those devil fruits from the vault Hanafuda immediately went to take the blame for it, though Alber had brushed him aside and told him not to worry (he'd known, hadn't he?). He took time to train them.
He'd said he'd be back soon when he left that one mission, promising that this time, this time he'd be back for Ulti's birthday.
When he'd been discovered dead, she'd tried to call that promise another lying smile between her tears, hiding away in the ceiling boards to avoid showing weakness.
...But not everyone who says they believe in good and had faith and righteousness is lying, after all.
Ulti knew she was violent somewhat by character. Being raised in the Beast Pirate culture as it was at the time certainly hadn't helped; it had probably done the lion's share of shaping her. Violence against the world that hated them was more than just a lifeline, it was revenge and a comfort in never being a victim again, and Ulti absorbed that even more than Page had.
But the part of her that was that angry little girl who couldn't accept that justice was for everyone except when it wasn't, the seed of her fury and unreasonable hardheadedness was born from her.
She didn't want to forgive Portgas. Yet at the same time, when he said he was sorry and his eyes didn't lie, it felt like being angry at him was no longer fair.
And she liked the good versions of her demon king and great angel.
She knew – she just knew – that Hanafuda would have joined them in the change in a heartbeat. It would have made him happy. He would have come to realize his parenting mistakes and probably with a less violent blowup than Kaido and Yamato had gone through. He would have done cool things like help save the world from Shiki and punch demons.
But he didn't get the chance.
Ulti screamed again, her voice muffled by her knees, and then screamed even louder. The rippling of the water was the only other noise she could hear; if any of the locals had been in the park, they'd clearly decided to beat feet as soon as she flew through the gates clearly about to crash out in spectacular fashion.
Probably figured she'd attack them just to vent. And Ulti couldn't even blame them for expecting it, because it wouldn't have been totally out of character for her a year ago.
She screamed. It helped her to keep from crying. She thought about punching the tree until it broke in half, but Bernadetta said they needed to not destroy things so she didn't. She can't ruin this week for Tiger. Not sweet Tiger who, like his siblings, loved Ulti and Page and never asked for anything in return.
Her head hurt when she stopped shrieking, throbbing like a drum. She'd pulled some strands of her hair out, causing her to shake her hands clean of them in embarrassed disgust at herself. Usually she didn't care about throwing tantrums, but in this exact moment she felt like she was too old to be kicking and screaming like this. She slumped against the tree and hit her head against it with a miserable groan.
What was she going to do?
...Ugh, these feelings are like statues dropping on her from on high. Her chest is being compressed and compacted and it hurts. No wonder Alber and Kaido are such messes.
“Ulti!” Page's worried voice drifted through the park. “Ulti, where are you?”
Oh noooooo. She didn't want Pay-Pay to see her in this pathetic state! Ulti tried to get up, only to find that she felt woozy and lethargic. So instead of getting away she stayed in place, slumped against the tree like a half-conscious sack of bricks as Page made his way from the gates to where she was standing.
...Aaaaand Portgas was with him, for some reason. Hanging back a distance but he'd come along and seemed relieved to have found her with how he was looking at her.
Looking at her with big concern in those ocean-colored eyes of his.
W...Why?
“Ulti,” Page said in relief, stumbling to a stop in front of her and kneeling down. His hands reached out to hold her and pause nervously, uncertain if she was gonna snap at him. Ulti's heart went squiggly-twisty in a bad way and she remembered how the kids would roughhouse and play, but never, ever hit each other. “Ulti, are – are you okay?”
“No,” Ulti mumbled hoarsely. She reached out and grabbed his hand, holding onto him to try and absorb his warmth. Reminding herself that he was here.
Page winced. “Sorry...that was stupid...”
“No,” Ulti repeated. “S' fine.” You came looking for me, she wanted to say, I know you're worried. Thanks, Pay-Pay.
The words are there! They're in her head, she has them in order! She just... just doesn't know how to say them. She wants to be graceful and dignified and noble like Alber is now, like a prince. It's so different from who she's always been, though, and she can't figure out how to emulate that energy.
Page blinked, a little taken aback... then he sat down next to her, leaning against her side comfortingly. “...He was never around,” he said quietly. “We needed him and he was never around.”
“He still cared about us.” Ulti pointed out. “He could have changed like the others are. And now we'll never know.”
“...Yeah.” Page sighed, looking at the trees.
Portgas slowly came closer and stopped about a yard or so away, crouching down so they were at eye level. “He wasn't a bad person,” He said awkwardly.
Ulti snorted. “Okay, guy, you don't have to lay it on that thick. Dad was a pirate and he worked for Kaido pre-sanity injection.”
“No, that's not quite what I – for a pirate, he wasn't a bad person.” Portgas explained, his hands flailing slightly. “I... I've remembered what happened that day, and it was my fault things escalated. Hanafuda had a deal to buy the fruits I decided to grab for the hell of it. He started the fight so he could honor the deal and get the sketchy underground market their money as promised.”
Ulti's stomach flipped over. “Then why?” She asked hoarsely. “Why go so far?”
Portgas hung his head in shame. “Because he reminded me that I was powerless to help Yamato. Help Tama. Kaido was too strong for me and Hanafuda was... he was there and he was someone I could fight, and I just lost it.”
Yamato. Tama.
That sick feeling intensified and Ulti put on the most blank face she could muster to try and hide it.
She never would have thought of that little girl if Himi hadn't befriended her and brought her to Kuri. A sweet, cute girl who was so inoffensive and innocent that Ulti's brain had taken on near hound-like qualities when she came into the conversation – anyone looked wrong at her and Ulti would headbutt them to death if Himi didn't get them first. She had also been starving before she met Himi. Starving because Orochi had made life so hard for Wano, and the Beast Pirates could have stopped him but took so long to do so she suffered needlessly.
Ulti hadn't helped Yamato after he got in all those fights with his dad. Alber would take him to the hospital when he was nearby in defiance of Kaido's instructions and Bernadetta would always help on the down-low, but Ulti just hadn't. Page was too intimidated to break the rules but Ulti had never cared to conform and Kaido had never punished her for that.
Hanafuda had suggested a few times that Kaido was too hard on Yamato, but he backed off when Kaido got stubborn about it.
...Of course Ace got so mad. Who wouldn't get mad seeing someone they cared about treated that way?
This whole being reasonable thing didn't feel good. It hurt.
“I guess...I can understand,” Page said after a long moment of silence. “When you care about someone, you... dad got like that when we got scrapes and bruises in Onigashima. Things got rowdy in there and we weren't always immune to the machinations that went on with people trying to raise their rank. When he was there dad didn't take kindly to that, and King would look out for us too. First time I saw him mad was when I got scalded by boiling water thanks to some kerfuffle between some headliners.”
“When he was there?” Ace asked.
Page shrugged, bothered. “Dad was barely around. More often than not he was out running some mission or other for Kaido, or he was doing Warlord things. He'd be gone for weeks or months at a time and mom was convinced to leave us. The Onigashima maids were the closest we had to consistent parents.”
“That doesn't make him being killed okay,” Ulti sniffed.
“Of course it doesn't.” Ace responded quietly, understanding. “Roger... Rayleigh said that he didn't intend to abandon my mom and tried everything he could think of to keep her safe. It doesn't change that she was hounded to her death for being his wife. I've spent so long hating him for it that I...I don't know what to do with Kaido telling me he was basically a good person.”
“You didn't know that?” Ulti wondered, vaguely bemused. “Most people I know who remember him say he was a chaotic dumbass who was as principled as Whitebeard. The stuff the Government says about him is almost all bullshit.”
Ace sighed. “Well, that's a change from hearing that he was a demonic monster and any child of his should be burnt at the stake.”
That again. Page huffed, shutting his eyes. “Eight hundred years and they couldn't come up with more than three lines to cycle through on that topic, huh? Its either passive-aggressive or murder attempts and the same three-six canned lines.”
“Yeah. Thanks, I hate it.” Ulti muttered.
Ace nodded. “I grew up angry. It festered inside me, burning away in my chest and feeding on every mocking laugh and declaration of hatred I heard directed at my bloodline. I never learned how to control it and... I should have. I really am sorry...”
“Why?” Ulti asked him in weak frustration. “This would be so much easier if you just said you didn't care, or said he got what was coming to him or – or that you'd avenged Yamato or something! Then we could fight and I wouldn't feel bad about it! Why are you sorry?”
“Because I was an orphan too,” Ace responded, shoulders sagging. “I know how much it hurts, and I never wanted to play a part in putting someone else in that position.”
His sincerity was awful. The worst. So why did it make the weight on Ulti's shoulders recede enough that she could feel a little lighter?
“It's not the same, though, is it?” Page offered quietly. “You were just a kid with absolutely no one in your corner. We were in our teens when...”
“That just makes it worse,” Ace said wearily. “I had no memories of Roger to make the burden of all that hate even worse. Your dad cared about you and I took him away.”
“...It wasn't you, really.” Page observed. He'd always been so much more level headed than Ulti, better at reasoning things through, and he never really had his heart in hurting civilians. He'd just done it to fit in with the crew and protect himself. “Dad would've been fine if he made it back to Wano. He got jumped by bounty hunters and...unlike you, they did intend to kill him.”
“And he would've beat them if I hadn't charred him so badly, I bet.” Ace said with a sigh. “We can't know. I'm taking responsibility for this because my family told me my temper was a problem and I just ignored them.”
“I can't say I forgive you,” Ulti mumbled.
“You don't have to.” Ace said quietly.
“Shut up, I wasn't done talking.” Ulti snipped. Ace obediently shut his mouth and watched her attentively. “I... I'm not sure how.” She huffed. “Tempers, huh? Don't I know it. I'm a really angry person, it's not a secret. I've done plenty of bad things. I'm not any better at not losing it than you are.”
Her tongue tasted metallic at the admission. “...I like Tama too. And it's... our fault she was hungry for so long.” She hit her head against her knees. “It's because of her and the other kids and Alber that I... I want to make a go at being a good person. And it actually feels better than being angry all the time. It's nice. ...I should forgive you.”
“Don't say that,” Ace responded.
Ulti bristled. “Oi, I'm trying to be conciliatory here-”
“I'm not condescending, I'm serious,” Ace said hastily. “Being a good person doesn't mean you're required to forgive someone who's really hurt you. Forgiveness can be asked for but never demanded; it's up to you whether you can or not.”
Ulti blinked at him, a little shocked as the words rushed over her. She didn't have to...? He's just letting her know that and stepping back, even if it means she and Pay-Pay never absolve him? The realization feels really weighty, but not in a crushing manner – more like a warm, heavy blanket.
“That sounded almost profound, hothead.” She blurted out.
Ace's eye twitched slightly before he let out a rueful chuckle. “Hey, it worked, didn't it? You look a little more calm.”
Ulti pulled out a handful of grass and chucked it at him. He must've thought she had second thought about not punching him, because he flailed in a mild panic and fell over backwards on his butt, collapsing in a heap. Ulti snickered, and Page's shoulders shivered with repressed giggles. “Y'know what, yeah, that made me feel a little better.” She declared arily.
Ace grumbled a little as he pushed himself back up into a sitting position. “That's what I get for trying to give advice. Next time I leave it to Luffy.”
Ulti's snickers petered out and she took in a deep breath. “I'm going... to think about this.” She said. “I'm not making any promises except that I'm thinking. No promises. You got it?”
Ace nodded in understanding.
Ulti looked at Page. “What about you, Pay-Pay?”
Her brother jolted, eyes widening again. He'd expected her to make the choice for both of them and that he'd conform, obviously, and Ulti squeezed his hand reassuringly. Sadness pooled in her stomach and she concluded that she needed to do something nice for him once they got back to Wano. Maybe make him an apology gift, for all the times she'd pushed him around?
“I...” Page stuttered, shoulders hunching uncertainly. “I... would like to think about it as well. I need to – to sort all my feelings out.”
“Okay,” Ace said “You don't have to do anything. All I can do is ask.”
Ulti closed her eyes and leaned against the tree trunk once again. Knawing at the back of her mind, unbidden and out of the blue, came a question she'd never considered before.
...If she apologized to Wano, for hurting the people there, would they ever forgive her? Would they want to?
Every rational bone in her body told her that no, keep dreaming. The population would probably come to tolerate her and Pay-Pay and the other Beast Pirates, since they'd stopped doing all those bad things they'd overseen after putting Orochi in power and fixed things that could be fixed. But if Ulti is struggling to forgive Ace, who'd really just been one half of the reason her father died, it must be harder – so much harder – for anyone in Wano to do the same for her.
She didn't have a noble revenge quest to mitigate her bad intentions like King – revenge and honor were such a big deal in Wano she's willing to bet that's the reason his reception has warmed up so much outside of spearheading the reforms – nor did she have years and years of people breaking her brain to explain her distorted moral compass like Kaido.
She was an angry girl who had felt that not becoming a 'lying eyes' person made her honest. But... if that's not who she is anymore...
Ulti clutched her knees.
Ace apologized to her and Pay-Pay – and meant it. If she wanted to find her way to being a good person, someone Yamato could be friends with and someone Tama could call a good Big Sister... she should...apologize to Wano too.
And that kind of scared her. The amount of things she'd be apologizing for, the sheer likelyhood of being furiously rejected... it was scary.
Ulti thought for two seconds about avoiding it. Then she became annoyed with herself and her temper kicked in – not towards violence, but filling her with a burning refusal to take the easy way out – to stay aloof and just hope they'd forgive her on her own if she did enough decent things for them.
How she'd go about it? No idea. But King probably had plenty. Bet he's been thinking about them ever since the Merville incident, maybe even before then. She'd ask him about how they might go about delivering a formal, Wano-style gesture of remorse as soon as she got back from this adventure.