Chapter Text
The door closed shut behind him with a soft click. The tired executive hung up his coat and hat with a weary sigh, treading over to his sofa and collapsing onto it. He closed his eyes and didn’t even flinch at the footsteps padding from behind him. He’d memorised those footfalls since he was 16.
“Dazai,” his tone was exasperated yet stern. “What are you doing here?” He pried his eyes open as the couch dipped beside him and an arm snaked around his waist, pulling him into Dazai’s side. Expecting blue-brown eyes met cheeky rust brown ones.
“I wanted to be with you.” Dazai nuzzled his nose into Chuuya’s cheek in an overly fond manner. It drained most of the fight out of his tension-brimmed body. “You know it’s risky, Mackerel.” Despite his protests, Chuuya turned his face and buried it into the crook of Dazai’s neck regardless, never one to deny the limited time they have with each other.
The brunette smiled at that, gladly putting his arms around the smaller man. The executive must have been exceptionally tired if he was accepting affection this easily.
“It’s alright, Chuuya. I haven’t done anything…concerning recently, so the agency won’t be checking up on me much. They won’t know.” Dazai pulled back to look right at Chuuya, firm and reassuring.
Being with Chuuya made him not want to fall back on his harmful habits. He seeked out less rivers, less blades on his bad days. Sometimes the urge would be back, but Chuuya would always be there, be it on call or physically there- whatever their situation permits.
Chuuya only pursed his lips and nodded, curling up on the couch and simply resting against Dazai’s chest as his partner carded long fingers through his hair. He closed his eyes as Dazai hummed lowly, sending vibrations through Chuuya’s senses.
It wasn’t as if Chuuya was ashamed of his relationship with Dazai. Chuuya loved Dazai, despite never saying it out loud unless in the privacy of their bedroom, with darkness and silence blanketing them with no one around to see or overhear.
Chuuya had known his preference since he was 16, lost and grieving after the Flags. He only had Kouyou and surprisingly Dazai as his only support. The other teen accompanied him to his grave visits, pestering him and keeping his emotions at bay in public by riling him up; something he would appreciate only after Dazai crawled back to whatever he was supposed to be doing than follow Chuuya to the graveyard.
The boy broke into his apartment once, while Chuuya had drunkenly called him, admitting in between heartbroken sobs how his apartment was too quiet without Albatross’s ruckus and noise and his late-night invites to pull ridiculous shit.
Dazai had spent the night bickering with Chuuya as they played video games until early into the morning. Chuuya had dozed off in the middle, wine still buzzing in his blood and tear tracks dried on his cheeks. He’d vaguely felt him being bodily handled into a sleeping position on the couch and a blanket thrown over him.
He was still conscious enough to catch the whispered words of “I’m sorry, Chuuya.”
Chuuya wasn’t dumb. He knows that the entire Verlaine incident hadn’t been controlled by the man himself. Dazai had his contingencies and interfered accordingly, and he chose the one with the least damage to the Port Mafia.
But hearing this apology, one so unexpected and genuine, had something in Chuuya soften. He’d fumbled his hand around blindly to grasp Dazai’s wrist. He whispered back ‘Stay’. And Dazai had done just that. The two teens fell asleep to each other’s slow breathing in the quiet of the room. Dazai was gone in the morning, but Chuuya knew it happened with the stupid little note Dazai had left on his desk.
After that their partnership had progressed. Their bond deepened, their trust became stronger than it used to be, and their dynamics…changed. From scathing insults to teasing remarks. From bruising punches in anger to scoffs and swats on the head (or kicks to the shin in Chuuya’s case). From hate to…tolerance. A feeling he’d never gotten for anyone other than his partner in crime.
The whisper of his name pulled Chuuya out of his slow descent to sleep. “Mn?”
Soft lips brushed his forehead in a feather-light kiss. “You can’t sleep like this, darling.”
The nickname had Chuuya’s face warming, but he only groaned, trying to burrow deeper into the expanse of Dazai’s body. “5 more minutes.”
The chuckle reverberated through the both of them. Dazai tightened his arms around Chuuya and for a second, the ginger thought he was granted his wish.
Oh, how wrong he was.
His stomach dropped as he was suddenly lifted into the air. Chuuya couldn’t keep in the shout as he scrambled to grip onto his partner, not trusting the man’s noodle arms to hold his weight.
“Dazai!” He hissed; his sleepiness vanished in favour for the adrenaline of being jolted out of his sleep.
The offender simply shrugged with a smug smirk. “I know that princess Chuuya would be complaining about back pain to me in the morning if I let him sleep here~ Besides, you didn’t even take off your shoes, how outrageous!”
Chuuya blinked in realisation. He then sighed and slumped back into the hold, letting the fight drain out of him. He did have a point. Chuuya would have spammed the man a slew of curses and angry texts about not moving him to the bed. And he was exceptionally tired, especially if he wasn’t even in the mood to take off his shoes and drag in the dirt.
Dazai’s pride in coming out victorious in the little squabble was shown through his haughty smile as he pulled off Chuuya’s shoes, toeing them vaguely into the foyer. Chuuya only gave him an unimpressed glance to which Dazai stuck his tongue out childishly.
He then carried him to the bathroom. He let Chuuya do a quick scrub down as he grabbed him a pair of pyjamas to change into. They had a matching pair; a crab one for Dazai and a dog one for Chuuya.
They were soon under the sheets of Chuuya’s large bed, queen sized, as Dazai joked about how it was perfect for princess Chuuya. The ginger always retorted about him being the princess instead with his various Snow White references.
Their feet tangled comfortably as they faced each other. Chuuya curled up close to him, forehead against Dazai’s chest, listening to his heartbeat. Dazai buried his nose in his damp ginger curls, taking in the slight scent of Chuuya’s fancy floral shampoo. A smaller hand found its way to Dazai’s, intertwining their fingers together in a sweet embrace.
“…You won’t stay.” Chuuya didn’t lift his head, simply staring idly at the crab patterns on the younger’s shirt. It was more of statement than a question.
Dazai closed his eyes with a slow exhale. “Yes. You know why.” He squeezed his hand, his chest growing heavy at the topic.
Chuuya squeezed back, eyes brimming with a sadness only preserved for this discussion. “Yeah…I’m sorry, Osamu.”
The brunette didn’t reply, only pulling Chuuya closer and clinging to him tightly.
It wasn’t the first time they had this conversation. Their relationship had to be a secret. Ignoring the fact that they were both men, they were from rival organisations. A truce or not, they would face many problems if either of their organisations found out. Or that’s what Chuuya seems to think.
Dazai has tried to persuade Chuuya to let the ADA know at least, but the older was paranoid as always. It had gotten tiring at one point to hide from everyone, to always be in disguise when going out, to not be able to declare his love for Chuuya to everyone. But he respected Chuuya’s decision and let them be hidden. It was the only way society would allow it. Especially one as conservative as theirs.
Sometimes when the two of them couldn’t sleep, they’d whisper out plans about moving to a little town where no one would care who they were or if they were both men. How they’d be able to hold hands in public, talk about each other with others without the looks of disgust, and to be able to love freely without locking it away. A place where they could be themselves.
They would fall asleep to their little perfect dream, yet both wake up to a day of loneliness. Forced to be separated and act as if they hate each other.
It was still dark when Chuuya was stirred from the rustling of the sheets. The alarm showed that it was barely 5 in the morning. He yawned, mumbling as he realised his favourite pillow was gone. He patted around for it, eyes blearily blinking open and closed. He collapsed back on the sheets as a slim hand patted his head, running through his sleep mussed locks affectionately.
“Samu…pillow,” he groaned, hands reaching to grasp his thigh and tug on his pants. The fabric was rougher than the pyjamas. It seemed the man changed into his work clothes. Dazai laughed, stopping his ministrations on his head. Chuuya whined at that, pushing his head into the hand.
“Sorry, Chuu, I need to go. You can’t sleep on me anymore.” He continued petting him, taking the grabby hand and holding it. His thumb gently rubbed his knuckles, as if to soothe him back to sleep.
The both of them knew it was inevitable, the cold harsh truth. Dazai would have to leave his house before sunrise and sneak back into the dorms before anyone wakes up and realises that he was gone. Chuuya never tried to convince him to stay, knowing Dazai would if he could. It would just hurt him more; bringing in feelings of guilt and shame of not being able to give what he was supposed to in a relationship. So they’d decided to simply bid their goodbyes sweetly and soak in each other’s presence while they still had time.
Dazai made a disapproving sound as Chuuya struggled to push himself up. His shirt was fisted loosely, and the tug barely had any strength to it, but Dazai let himself fall closer to his lover, giggling when their noses bumped at the unsteadiness. Chuuya also laughed a little, drowsy as he slowly blinked at him.
They did a little eskimo kiss as Chuuya hummed tiredly. “’m gonna miss you.”
Dazai cupped his cheeks, resting their foreheads together as he stared with a mixture of happiness and sadness. “Yeah, I’ll miss you too, Chuuya. My beloved little boyfriend.”
Chuuya tsked, eyes still soft in the darkness of their room. His heart soared at the title, one they could only use in whispers or behind closed doors. “Who ya calling little?”
He still leaned forward to capture Dazai’s lips in a loving kiss. Dazai went back in for another kiss, a longer and passionate one. It was slow, exchanging the emotions and words they wanted to say but never have the time to.
They parted, breathing softly yet unwilling to leave the other just yet. “When will I see you again?” Dazai questioned despite knowing better than to ask.
Chuuya’s gaze turned gloomy, and he looked away. “I don’t know. But I’ll keep in contact, through our burners.”
Their schedules were horrible, on Chuuya’s part at least. He always had some work to do at every minute of the day. Be it undercover mission, raids, training the recruits, or even stacks upon stacks of paperwork. He never had a free day to enjoy and take a break. It wasn’t something he really cared about until Dazai had gotten antsy from not being able to meet him often. Of course, he was also not comfortable with their rare moments together but he had forced himself to accept it as it was.
Dazai pursed his lips and moved to hold Chuuya’s hands in a tight grip. “Next Friday, let’s go out? We can go to the carnival and see the fireworks. Disguised and everything?”
The desperation in his voice made Chuuya crack and hesitate. It should be fine if they were disguised and it was at night. “Fine, I’ll think about it.” He gave Dazai a small genuine smile. “Get to the dorms safe, alright?”
Dazai returned the smile, practically beaming as if Chuuya had agreed. Bastard probably knows that Chuuya will end up agreeing. “Of course I’ll be safe. How else will I get to go out with Chuuya next week?”
The older man rolled his eyes and shoved Dazai’s chest with a scoff. The taller simply shuffled off the bed with an air of smugness. “Get lost already, Mackerel.”
Dazai grinned cheekily, giving a little salute as he walks backwards towards the door. “Alrighty~ Oh, wait I forgot something!”
Before Chuuya could comprehend, the bandaged man darted forward and gave him a sloppy kiss on his forehead and lips before darting away with a ‘Sleep well, mon amour!’.
Chuuya blinked stunned at the doorway before flopping back on the bed, grumbling to himself as he willed the red of his cheeks away. His heart was racing too fast to fall back asleep anytime soon. Damn you, Dazai.
A couple hours later
Dazai mindlessly doodled on his paperwork, which he was supposed to be filling in. He already wished he were back at Chuuya’s apartment, buried under the covers and wrapped around his dog as he slobbered all over him with his drool. A habit he always made fun of Chuuya for but always undeniably found it adorable and looked on fondly when it happens.
He was in the middle of folding the, rather important, paper into a plane when his phone pinged. As easily distracted as a cat by a laser, he picked up his phone and realised there were no notifications. He perked up, realising it was from his burner phone then. A slight panic in him had his scrambling to get his burner out.
Chuuya never texted him during work hours, only for emergencies. Did he end up getting hurt? Did he use corruption because of that bastard Mori-
Charming: I know I’m not supposed to text during work hours but I guess this would help motivate you. I’m only gonna go with you if you finish all your work until Friday. I can’t check of course but I expect at least some modicum of integrity from ya!
Reading the text from Chuuya’s alias ‘Charming’, an inside joke of their Snow White and Prince Charming banter, made him relax. But it also filled Dazai to the brim with joy. He obviously couldn’t give work his all out of nowhere. That would be suspicious and Chuuya would hate any inkling of why Dazai was doing work being spread. They were detectives, and curiosity is the worst thing you could give them.
He still grinned giddily as he unfolded the paperwork and attempted to smoothen it out.
“Is everything okay, Dazai-san?” Atsushi asked, warily eyeing the way Dazai was treating his work for once. It was a good thing Atsushi was never one to peek and respected privacy. He hadn’t seen the text, fortunately.
“Yep, perfectly fine, my dear apprentice!”
“Oi, Dazai, quit talking and do your damn work!” Kunikida snapped, glaring from the desk opposite.
Ah perfect, just the thing Dazai needed to set his plan in motion. Dazai groaned and whined, kicking out his feet. “Ne, Kunikida how about a deal? I’ll make sure it’s worth it~”
“Tsk, what is it. Quickly spit it out and it better be worth it!” The blonde tapped his foot impatiently.
“How about I do all my work until next Thursday, and you let me take the day off on Friday?” Kunikida stared at him, eyes squinted suspiciously.
“You’re…serious? You promise to do all your work? Not a single minute of procrastination?”
Dazai grinned as innocently as he could, holding up three fingers in a scout’s promise. “Mhm! Cross my heart and hope to die! Pinkie promise! Swear on Atsushi’s dear life~”
Atsushi squeaked in terror, sweat dropping from the side but Dazai paid no mind. Anything for Chuuya.
Kunikida sat silent for a moment, carefully assessing the situation. He nodded after a minute. “Fine, but if you don’t follow up, I’m forcing you to stay behind overtime on Friday.”
Dazai shrugged, pulling his paperwork closer to him and finally picking up a pen for the first time in a while. Kunikida seemed to want to ask what was so special about Friday, but Dazai knew he wouldn’t. He had a rule in his ideals to not mix up his work life and personal life by asking such questions. So convenient for Dazai!
Dazai absently caught Ranpo’s eye, who’d stared at him curiously. Dazai raised a brow, internally praying the man doesn’t catch on. Ranpo simply shrugged and turned back to his candy.
The brunette turned back to the stacks of paperwork Kunikida was placing on his desk to finish by the evening. An accumulation of his previous paperwork apparently. How exciting.
He wished he could put a picture of Chuuya on his desk to stare at for motivation…A frown tugged at his lips, and he shook his head of the distracting thoughts. It was fine, as long as he could remember his partner, he didn’t need a picture. He wouldn’t let such a simple thing stop him. He won’t let this ridiculous secret relationship situation stop him!
Dazai could remember everything about him, from his scent to the slope of his nose and the constellation of freckles Chuuya hid with makeup, to the numbers and barcode engraved onto Chuuya’s nape.
He smiled and continued his paperwork, more determination in the stroke of his kanji than ever present.
The former mafioso was already planning how to surprise his slug on his day off. He would have started giggling manically if he had no restraint. He simply couldn’t wait until Friday!
Tbc~