Chapter Text
*Five Years Later*
Eyes scanning the document in front of her, Clarke runs a hand through her hair and taps the end of her pen against the edge of the notebook next to her. Letting out a heavy breath, she leans back in her seat and prays for some kind of distraction, even just for a couple of minutes.
Seconds later, keys jingling in the lock of the front door pull her attention. She smiles to herself, already knowing who’s going to be on the other side, and turns fully in her seat.
“Mommy!”
Clarke beams and opens her arms up to her daughter, pulling the little girl into her lap and peppering her face with kisses. “Oh, I missed you, Beanie.” She settles Madi comfortably in her lap, keeping her arms around the girl’s back, and smiles softly at her. “I don’t like not getting to see you all day.”
“I missed you too, Mommy,” Madi tells her. “But me ‘n Daddy had to get stuff for my party.”
Clarke nods. “That’s right. You have a birthday party today. All your friends are coming, and all your aunts and uncles.”
“And Grandma!” Madi shouts. “And Grandpa! And Nana!”
Clarke smiles. “Yes, they’re coming too. Are you excited to see everyone?”
Madi smiles and nods. “Uh-huh. I’m so super excited, Mommy.”
“I know you are. Did you have fun at the store with Daddy?”
Madi nods again. “Yeah. I love Daddy so much.”
“And Daddy loves you very much too,” Clarke tells her. “Now go on and play in your room until it’s time to leave, okay?”
“Okay.” Madi slides off her lap and runs down the small hallway toward her bedroom.
Clarke watches her go and then turns to her fiancé, throwing a sweet smile in his direction. “Hi.”
Bellamy sets the shopping bags down on the couch and then walks over to her, stopping in front of her and smiling down, caressing her cheek with one hand. “Hi. How was your morning?”
She lets out a heavy sigh. “Not as much fun as it would have been with you two here.”
“I know. But your paper is important too, and thankfully the semester’s almost over.” He takes a deep breath. “Now, you sure you’re prepared for today?”
Clarke’s brows furrow slightly. “You do know who you’re talking to, right? I’ve been planning this thing for months.”
Bellamy chuckles. “No, I know. I meant are you ready emotionally? Our baby girl is five now, Clarke. That means kindergarten in the fall.”
Clarke groans. “Don’t remind me. She just keeps getting older and I genuinely don’t know how to feel about it. Wasn’t it just yesterday that we held her for the first time?”
Bellamy sighs. “It certainly feels that way sometimes. This is a pretty big milestone, though.”
“Not the only milestone this year,” Clarke remarks, raising her left hand in the air and wiggling her fingers.
Bellamy grins, leaning down to kiss her deeply. “I can’t wait to finally call you my wife.”
“Mommy! Daddy!”
Clarke laughs at the pout on Bellamy’s face, lightly patting his chest. “Better go see what that’s about.”
“In case you didn’t hear her, Princess, she asked for both of us.” He gently tugs on her hands to pull her out of the chair, pressing a quick kiss to her lips as he does so. “Now let’s go see what she wants.”
“You go, I just need to save this real quick so I don’t accidentally lose it,” she tells him, gesturing to her laptop.
He smiles. “Okay.” He presses one more kiss to her lips and then moves through the small apartment. “Alright, Beanie, what’s so important you gotta interrupt me and Mommy?”
Clarke laughs quietly, knowing she’s never going to be over how great of a dad Bellamy is, how he stepped up into a role she never expected him to at that point in their lives. The last five years haven’t been the easiest, but they’ve managed the best they could. And it helps that they’ve had so many friends and family helping them out on occasion too.
Saving her work on her computer, Clarke closes the lid of the laptop and then makes her way to her daughter’s bedroom, curious as to what the little girl was so eager to show her and Bellamy. As soon as she steps into the doorway, she can’t help the smile that grows on her face when she sees Bellamy holding Madi on his hip, the two of them in the middle of an animated conversation, Bellamy completely focused on their daughter.
Leaning against the doorframe, she simply watches silently, waiting for the right moment to interrupt, or for one of them to notice her. Either way, she’s more than content with just watching her two favorite people in the world.
“Mommy!”
She focuses back on the moment to find Bellamy and Madi both watching her. “Hey, sorry. What’s going on in here?”
“Beanie wanted to show us what she plans on wearing to her party today.”
Clarke’s brows furrow tightly. “I thought we already picked your outfit.”
Madi grins. “I changed it. I wanna wear my Dino.”
“You do?”
Madi nods. “Yeah. I wanna chase Uncle Smurf around the park.”
Clarke snorts. “Is that the only reason you wanna wear it?”
Madi nods again. “Yeah.”
“Of course it is. Why don’t we take it in the car with us since you won’t fit inside the car while wearing it? And then when Uncle Smurf gets there, you can put it on and chase him around. And you can wear the outfit we already picked out since I know you’re gonna get too hot if you wear your Dino costume the whole time.”
Madi’s head tilts, a familiar look of concentration on her face. “Okay.”
“Wonderful. And we’ve only got about an hour before we need to head out, so what do you want to do?”
“Anything?”
“Within reason, but yeah.”
Madi grins. “I wanna paint you and Daddy.”
Clarke smiles softly at her daughter’s words. “I think that’s a great idea.”
.
.
.
With the afternoon sun shining down on the local park, Clarke busies herself with getting a small section of the park set up for her daughter’s fifth birthday party. She can hardly believe it’s already been five years since her baby was born. The time has flown so fast, but it also feels like it was just yesterday that she felt Madi kick for the first time. And then held her in her arms for the first time. And then saw her actually smile for the first time, and laugh, and–
An excited squeal pulls her out of her reminiscing, and she turns around just in time to witness her daughter dart across the grass toward Murphy. It’s still baffling to her sometimes that John Murphy is one of her daughter’s absolute favorite people on the planet. She’s not sure anyone would have been able to predict that.
“Uncle Smurf!”
Clarke laughs at the look on her friend’s face when Madi latches onto his legs. She turns back and continues unpacking the party items, directing the other adults there on where to put everything. Thankfully there isn’t much left to do, given that she’s had tons of help from her friends.
“Uncle Smuuurf!” Madi whines. “Pleeeease?”
Clarke turns in time to see Murphy relenting to whatever the request is with a smile, a smile that he only ever has with Madi.
“Alright, Little Foot, come on.” He grabs her under the arms and lifts her into the air, resting her belly on his shoulder, one arm wrapping securely around the little girl’s waist.
“John Murphy, if you drop my daughter, I swear you won’t live to see tomorrow.”
Murphy laughs. “Relax, Mama Bear. Do you know how many times we’ve done this?”
She huffs. “Yeah, that doesn’t help.”
“It’s okay, Mommy,” Madi calls out with a giggle. “He’s always super safe. The safest airplane in the whole entire world.”
Clarke nods. So that’s what they’re doing. “Alright. No flying over the food, though, please. And stick to the grass in case there needs to be a crash landing.”
Murphy gives her a mock salute. “Aye, aye.”
Madi giggles and copies him the best she can. “Aye, aye, Mommy.”
Shaking her head with a quiet laugh, Clarke once again turns back to her current task of getting the party ready. All of Madi’s friends are going to start arriving soon and she needs to have everything set up before they do. That way she can just focus on the party itself and making sure her daughter has an enjoyable time.
“Okay, the cake is on its way.”
Clarke turns and smiles brightly at Harper. “Perfect. And you’re sure the guys can handle it?”
“Zoe’s with them.”
Clarke nods. “Smart choice. At least they feel like they’re contributing.”
“True. But you know they’ll be amazing at helping to wear all those kids out.”
“Why do you think we’re having the party at a park?”
“Clarke Griffin, she always thinks of everything.”
Clarke laughs. “Oh, that’s definitely been tested over the last five years. I’m honestly surprised I remembered everything for the party.”
“Except to pick up the cake,” Harper points out.
Clarke sighs and nods. “Except to pick up the cake. Which is why I’m so glad that my daughter has the best godmother who’s willing to help me find solutions to problems of my own making.”
“Hey, I want every birthday that Madi has to be the best it can be. Any way that I can help make it happen, you know I’m here.”
Clarke smiles and grabs her friend’s hand, giving it a small squeeze. “I know. We’re so lucky to have you.”
“I know the feeling.” She takes a deep breath. “Now, since we’ve got the cake situation sorted, is there anything else that I can—”
“Aunt Harper!”
Clarke can’t help but laugh at the way Madi launches herself at Harper, much the same way she did to Murphy, and holds on tightly. The young girl is talking a mile a minute, and Harper is hanging onto every word Madi says. She really couldn’t have asked for better people to be her daughter’s aunts and uncles.
“Mommy! Can Aunt Harper come play?”
Clarke smiles at her friend. “I think I just figured out what you can do to help out.”
Harper grins and squeezes Madi a little tighter. “I’m more than happy to spend time with my favorite girl before the party gets started.” She looks at Madi. “What do you wanna do first?”
“Um…the slide! I can go down on my belly!”
“Well now, that I have got to see. Let’s go.” She bounces slightly as she turns, eliciting giggles from Madi, and then makes her way toward the playground equipment.
“Looks like the birthday girl’s already having a great time.”
Clarke grins and spins quickly on her heels. “Wells.” She throws her arms around his neck in a tight hug. “Oh, I’m so glad you’re here this year.”
“Me too,” he tells her as they break their hug. “I’m still bummed I had to miss last year’s party.”
Clarke shrugs. “You were sick. And I appreciate you not wanting to be around my daughter while you were contagious. She still loves the present you got her, by the way. I think I’ve told you that, but it bears repeating.”
Wells laughs quietly. “I’m always happy to hear it. Speaking of my favorite niece, where is she?”
“Running around with Harper. Probably Murphy too.”
“You know, it shouldn’t still shock me that your kid loves Murphy so much.”
Clarke laughs. “Honestly, he’s a good guy deep down. Just don’t let him know I told you that, he’ll say it ruins his image. He’s great with her, though. He’s our go-to babysitter whenever he’s in town. If Harper hasn’t already claimed the role for that particular moment.”
“Yeah, that doesn’t surprise me. Need help with anything?”
“Not at the moment. But I’m sure the birthday girl would love to see you.”
“Say no more.” He smiles and turns, jogging across the grass toward the playground. “Where’s my favorite birthday girl?”
A sharp squeal. “Uncle Wells!”
.
.
.
Madi gasps loudly with a wide smile. “Miss ‘Mori! Uncle Smurf! You hafta meet Miss ‘Mori! I’ll go get her.”
Clarke chuckles at the look on Murphy’s face as Madi darts over to the nearby parking lot, thankfully still in view. “Emori is one of Madi’s teachers from PreK. Well, one of the student teachers. I think she wants to go into early childhood development. Madi’s been pretty much obsessed with her from day one.”
Madi approaches the party area again a few moments later, dragging Emori behind her. The woman has an amused smile on her face and a present tucked under one arm. “Uncle Smurf! This is Miss ‘Mori. Isn’t she pretty? She only has three fingers on one of her hands.”
Clarke’s eyes go wide. “Madison,” she scolds, though she’s not at all surprised, having heard this fact before from her daughter.
Emori smiles softly. “It’s okay. If I wasn’t comfortable with my hand, I wouldn’t be working with a bunch of toddlers. They have no filter whatsoever.”
Clarke sighs heavily. “No, they do not. Beanie, why don’t you go play with your friends until it’s time for dinner, okay?”
Madi huffs. “Fine. But I wanna sit by Uncle Smurf.”
Clarke smiles and nods. “Okay. Now go play.”
Madi reaches up to hug Murphy and then runs off. “Bye, Uncle Smurf!”
Emori laughs quietly as she takes a seat at the picnic table. “Uncle Smurf, huh?” she says to Murphy. “What’s that all about?”
He sighs heavily. “My last name’s Murphy. The hobbit over there was about two and trying to say ‘Murphy’ since that’s what everyone calls me. It came out as ‘Smurf’ instead.”
“And he’s been Uncle Smurf ever since,” Clarke pipes in with a smile. “Our Halloween costume that year was the Smurfs once Madi made the connection. When I tell you it was more of a struggle to get Murphy covered head-to-toe in blue paint than it was to get my toddler to eat vegetables...”
Emori grins. “Please tell me you have pictures of that.”
“Plenty.”
Murphy rolls his eyes. “And you wonder why I went traveling for a year to get away from you people.”
“And yet you came back to us.”
“Clearly a lapse in judgment.”
Clarke laughs at his remark, turning back to her task of getting the party set up. Only a small handful of Madi’s preschool friends have shown up, so the party hasn’t gotten started yet, which means she still has some time to finish things. And she’s determined to make this an amazing party. She’s not sure if Madi will remember this party in ten years, but given the chance that she will, Clarke wants it to be as memorable as possible.
.
.
.
Clarke’s brows furrow as her eyes run over everything sitting on top of the picnic table, a frown tugging at her lips. She runs through her mental checklist of all the party items she’d packed into the car earlier. “Damn.”
“Everything okay?”
Clarke glances up at Harper. “Yeah. Think I left a few things in the car, though. I’ll be right back.” She immediately turns and heads toward the parking lot, pulling her keys out of her pocket as she goes.
“Clarke!”
She turns slightly and smiles at the approaching woman. “Raven, hey. I was wondering when you’d get here.”
Raven lets out a breath. “I know. My last appointment ran a little longer than I would have liked. Why aren’t you over with everyone?”
“Forgot some stuff in the car. Do you mind giving me a hand? It’s not a lot.”
Raven shrugs. “Sure.”
They fall into step beside each other as they head toward Clarke’s car, chatting about how their days have been and all the antics they’re sure Madi is going to get up to at her party. Just like Bellamy had predicted all those years ago, Madi keeps them both on their toes. Keeps all of them on their toes, if she’s being honest. The little girl may love all her honorary aunties and uncles to death, but she’s still just as crazy with them as she is with her and Bellamy.
She really wouldn’t have it any other way, though; she loves her daughter endlessly.
When they reach Clarke’s car, she lets out a sigh of relief when she finds two of the small boxes of party supplies sitting in the back next to Madi’s booster seat. She hands one to Raven and settles the other into the crook of her elbow, then closes and locks the car.
The walk back is just as easy, their conversation continuing casually as they continue to catch up and make tentative plans to hang out soon. They’ve both been incredibly busy, but Clarke knows that finding time for her friends is paramount to her keeping her sanity in check.
“Clarke? Raven?”
Stopping dead in her tracks, her entire body stiffens. The voice rings through her memories, forcing a face to the front of her mind, a face she rarely thinks about anymore. Only in those quiet moments when she swears she sees a hint of him flickering across her daughter’s features. But it’s always gone just as quickly as it appeared.
Spinning slowly, Clarke fights back every urge she has to shout at the man in front of her, to yell at him about everything he said to her all those years ago. But that’s not going to accomplish anything. So she breathes deeply, squares her shoulders, and offers a tight, polite smile. “Finn.”
He raises a hand in a small wave. “Hey.”
“What are you doing here?” Raven interrupts, stepping closer. “I thought they banned slime from the park after what happened two years ago.”
Clarke resists the desire to laugh.
“Okay, I deserved that,” Finn says with a slight nod.
“You didn’t answer my question.”
He sighs. “I’m just out for a walk. Honest. Given how things ended between all of us, it really wouldn’t have been a good idea to actively seek you out. Are you two…friends now?” he asks tentatively.
“Yes, we are,” Raven states matter-of-factly, standing a little taller.
“Right. That’s uh, that’s good.”
Raven rolls her eyes. “I’m done here.”
“Wait,” Finn calls out before Raven can get more than a step away. “While you’re both here…I want to apologize. It was wrong to cheat on you both and lie about it; I never should have done that. And Clarke…I’m sorry for the way I spoke to you, and for trying to force you into getting an abortion on the spot.”
Clarke nods once. “Thank you for saying that.” She shifts on her feet, unsure of exactly where to take the conversation. She hasn’t seen him in almost six years, never thought she’d ever have to confront him about anything. “Um, so, uh, how have you been?”
He shrugs. “Fine. You?”
“Stressed. But doing okay. Thankfully I’m—”
“Mommy!”
Clarke’s heart leaps in her chest at the realization that Finn is about to meet his biological child. The child he didn’t even want in the first place. This is the one thing she never actually planned for because she never thought it’d happen. Not after the way they left things.
Promptly ignoring the look on her ex’s face, she passes her box over to Raven and spins around to catch Madi as the young girl leaps into her arms. She laughs as she hugs her daughter close. “Oh, I love getting hugs like this. Are you having fun?”
Madi leans back and nods. “Yeah. Daddy says we hafta take my picture soon for Trixie.”
“Considering you haven’t gotten anything on your clothes yet, I’d say that’s a fair request.”
“Mommy, who’s that?”
Clarke follows her daughter's pointed hand and glances at Finn, swallowing thickly. “Uh, that’s Finn. He’s uh, he’s an old friend of Mommy’s.”
“Hello,” Finn says, a tight smile on his lips. “I heard it’s your birthday.”
Madi nods eagerly. “I’m five.”
“Well, happy fifth birthday.”
“Thank you.”
“Hey, Beanie, why don’t you and Auntie Raven go back to the party, okay? I’ll be there in a minute and we can take your picture.”
Raven steps forward with a smile. “Come on, munchkin.” She shifts both boxes to one arm and then grabs Madi’s hand with her free one, swinging their arms wide between them to get a laugh, and then starts back toward the party.
“Who’s Trixie?”
Clarke turns back to Finn with furrowed brows. “What?”
“She said you have to take a picture for someone named Trixie.”
“Oh. Right. That’s uh, she was the nurse who was there when I was giving birth. I was beyond scared but she helped reassure me that I could do it, made me feel even safer than I did with Bellamy and my mom there. We send her a picture of Madi every year, and a little note about how she’s doing.”
“That’s nice. I’m sure she doesn’t get too many of those.”
Clarke shrugs. “It’s my own way of saying thank you.” She shifts on her feet a bit. “Do you want to meet her? Madi, I mean. Officially?”
“Yes. But no,” he adds with a small shake of his head. “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
“Technically speaking, you are her dad.”
“From where I’m standing, she’s already got one.” He gestures with his head to where Bellamy is swinging Madi around and making her laugh. “I’m just half her DNA. And I know Bellamy’s never been my biggest fan.” He takes a deep breath. “No, I think it’s better for everybody that things stay as they are. And if, when she’s older, she wants to meet me or get to know me, I would be more than happy to. But for now…I think everything is just as it should be.”
Clarke offers him a small smile. “Thank you.”
He shrugs. “I’m not dad material. Don’t think I ever really will be. But Bellamy…It clearly suits him.”
Clarke smiles. “Yeah, it really does. I, uh, I guess I’ll see you around?”
“Maybe.” He offers her the smallest hint of a smile and then turns to make his way down the sidewalk.
Letting out a shaky breath, Clarke watches him go until he’s out of view, then turns around to face her daughter’s birthday party that’s in full swing. All of Madi’s friends are running around in the grass while all of the adults are sitting around and talking. Well, except for Monty, Jasper, and Bellamy, who are also running around with the kids.
Approaching the party, she laughs when Murphy ends up getting dragged into whatever game the kids are playing, Madi tugging firmly on his hand to get him to move. Despite all of his insistence to the contrary, Murphy will do anything for Madi, and Clarke absolutely loves it. He’s surprisingly fantastic with her.
Falling onto the picnic table bench with a heavy breath, Clarke offers the friends sitting closest to her a small smile.
“You doing good?” Raven asks.
“Better than I thought I’d be after seeing him again.”
“Raven told us what happened,” Harper says. “He didn't say or do anything unsavory, did he?”
Clarke shakes her head. “No, thank goodness. He was surprisingly civil and said he doesn’t want to disrupt Madi’s life in any way. He knows who her dad is,” she says, smiling over at her fiancé and their daughter.
“Good. Because he and I would be having a very intense discussion if he tried to completely disrupt the life you three have built. He’s the one who didn’t want to be a dad in the first place.”
Clarke smiles at her best friend, draping an arm over Harper’s shoulders and pulling her close. “I know. And so does he. He said he’s willing to meet her if she wants to meet him when she’s older. But considering we’ve never told Madi that Bellamy isn’t her biological father, I don’t see that happening for a while.”
“Are you ever going to tell her?” Raven asks.
Clarke shrugs. “Probably one day. But it’s not an issue right now. Bellamy’s the only dad she’s ever known, I’m not exactly looking forward to shattering all of that while she’s still so small. Maybe that’s the wrong decision, but it’s mine. I’m doing what I believe is best for my daughter.”
“And you know we’re all one hundred percent behind you.”
Clarke smiles at the brunette. “Thanks. I’ve always known that, but it’s good to hear it sometimes.”
“Mommy!”
Clarke laughs at the sight of Bellamy approaching with Madi clinging haphazardly to his back, the biggest grin on the five-year-old’s face, her hair a complete mess. “Well, somebody looks like they’ve been having fun.”
Bellamy chuckles. “She’s certainly been keeping us on our toes.” He unceremoniously drops Madi into her lap. “But she said she wants you now.”
Clarke smiles at her daughter, instinctively wrapping her arms around the girl to keep her close and prevent her from falling. “Well, I certainly don’t mind that.” She brushes some of her daughter’s hair out of her face. “Are you having fun with Daddy and your uncles?”
Madi nods, grin still on her face. “Yeah.”
She presses a kiss to the girl’s forehead. “Good. It’s very important that we have fun on our birthdays. Should we take your picture for Trixie before you get your clothes dirty?”
“Okay!” Madi leaps off her lap and lands on the grass in a crouch. “Take my picture like this.”
Clarke laughs and pulls out her phone, angling it just right to capture Madi’s sweet smile. “Beautiful. Trixie’s gonna love that.” She slips her phone away and focuses on her daughter. “Go play for a little bit and then we’ll eat lunch when your grandparents all get here, okay?”
“Okay, Mommy.” Madi turns and darts toward the playground, immediately jumping onto Murphy’s back where the man sits in the grass talking to Emori.
Clarke shakes her head at the weak protests coming from her friend and then turns back to the picnic table, smiling at her fiancé now sitting next to her. “Hi.”
He smiles back. “Hey. Madi said you were talking to an old friend, and Raven only responded with a death glare when I asked for clarification. Am I safe to assume you were talking to…him?”
Clarke nods, letting out a breath. “Yeah. Almost six whole years of thinking I'd never see him again and he was…right there.”
“How are you feeling?” he asks, a gentle hand rubbing slow circles into her lower back, much the way he did while she was pregnant with Madi.
“Honestly? I think I’m still processing. But knowing that he’s not going to try and fight me to have visitation or custody of Madi is a huge relief. I think it was always a worry, I just never let myself dwell on it because I didn’t think he’d actually show back up.”
“You’re sure he won’t try anything?”
Clarke nods. “I’m sure. He’s not going to try anything. But he said that he wants to meet her one day if she wants that. I believe him that he’s not going to push to be a part of her life.”
Bellamy nods slowly. “Okay. Then we don’t have to think or worry about him for the rest of the day. It’s our little girl’s fifth birthday, the most important one.”
Clarke laughs quietly. “You’ve said that for every single one of her birthdays.”
“And I’m going to keep saying it for every birthday she has after this.”
Clarke smiles, leaning forward to kiss him, her hand gently cradling his cheek. “You’re such a good dad. I love you so much.”
“I love you too, Princess.”
“Mommy! Daddy!” Madi runs full force toward them, her entire face lit up. She stops abruptly with a jump when she reaches them, grinning. “It’s time to eat!”
Clarke raises a brow. “Oh, is it now?”
Madi nods, pushing her hair back with both hands. “Yeah! Grandma, Grandpa, and Nana are here now! And you said we can eat when they get here.”
“Hm.” Clarke glances up at her parents and Aurora making their way over, giving them a quick wave, and then focuses on her daughter again. “I did say that. I guess we should eat, then.”
Bellamy chuckles at Madi’s excited dance, standing from the bench and swinging the five-year-old up into the air, then settling her sideways in his arms against his chest. “Birthday girl gets served first, come on.” He presses a kiss to their daughter’s temple and then steps over to where all the food is set out, grabbing a paper plate and letting Madi dictate what she wants to eat.
Clarke leans back with a smile, her heart swelling. She will never get sick of watching the two of them together; they’re her two favorite people in the world. And even though she would have greatly preferred not to have been pregnant while in high school, she loves her little family more than words can describe and wouldn’t trade them for anything.