Chapter Text
“You just don’t give up, sweetheart.”
The Ghoul observed that a few times traveling with you. You face down in the dirt. Blood on your teeth. Pushing up with that telltale upset and equally endearing wrinkle in your brow. Puffy and stubborn. Clearly aching.
Furious.
You didn’t carry your anger well or with much grace. But, you carried it. It made you hit harder. Aim better. Get up faster. Forced recovery. You used it with no end in sight because you had it to spare. Miles and miles.
This fucking world. Rotten to the core. Radiation. Giant bugs. Mutants. Feral ghouls. Slavers. Generally shitty people.
This wasn’t like the Vault where a community of naive fools worked together. All blue and clockwork. Smelling of the same soap. No. It was everyone out for themselves out here. Sometimes even in the factions you met seeking newcomers for a cause. Groups that prided themselves on killing the most enemies.
Everyone preaching about fixing a world when they really just wanted the biggest stake. The greatest influence for whatever ideals they peddled. Disenchantment was a sucker punch. Maybe a necessary blow for survival.
Cooper didn’t help you up but he smirked a little watching you try. Pushing up all rueful like you might shake your fist at the sky. Free entertainment. It took some teeth pulling to get a name out of him but you weren’t paying him for any life sob stories. You just didn’t want to call the guy “Ghoul” the whole time.
“Let’s go,” you said, already trekking forward. Stumbling after a fight with some dickhole raiders. Dusting off, you gave a grunt and felt around the leather chest piece. Fingers sought a wet spot. Blood. “Fuck.”
“Can’t travel or pay me more caps and Jet if you bleed out.” Coop was nonchalantly inhaling some chems behind you. Keep himself from turning feral. Eyes shut to savor. “Fuck, that’s good shit.”
“It’s just a small gash.” You held your side and winced before spitting blood. A nasty right hook burst your bottom lip. Your shit got rocked in fights. A lot. Hence the paid companion. You had skills. Computer hacking. Lockpicking. General stealth because girls like you went so unnoticed. You could fix and upgrade almost anything. “It’s nothing.”
The Wasteland beat you to shit. Lost from a community you had your whole life was an open wound. Worse than bullets and blades. Worse than betrayal and whatever danger lurked over every hill out here.
That great betrayal already happened so someone trying to kill you out here was nothing. Take a fucking shot.
You paid the Ghoul for safe passage at first and then you both found something in common. Hatred for the damn Vaults. And whoever was holding the leash controlling it all now.
They were due for a few bullets and a hell of a lot of questioning. Worse, you hoped. You both seemed to survive off spite and on a sliver of hope that those questions could be answered. Vault-Tec had hell to pay.
Fuck them all. Fuck them and their cruel experiments and their horrible secrets from the start. They played around with human lives. Started this all. Dropped bombs to make everyone dependent. For fun. According to Coop after he went on a bender and ranted loudly at you for a night.
There was no protecting people, there was only rebuilding the world in Vault-Tec’s fucked up image. Your blue Vault jumpsuit burned over a fire the first week. That felt good.
You still missed it a little. Community. The family you lost. Ignorant of that horrible plotting.
Fuck, you were still bleeding.
A beat before your steps stopped. The sun would be going down soon. Admittedly, it was pretty. The sunset and sunrise. All those colors in the wind. They almost made you forget. You didn’t have any trace of sky in the Vault.
“Hey. Can you sew me up?” Defeated, your head tilted back to see Cooper. Twisted, scarred skin and dark eyes. Noseless. His tattered coat in the wind. Something always so intense and guarded.
“Long as you ain’t bitch about it when I do.” That classic cowboy danced in his tone. His hat tipped. He owed you for some Jet vials you stole. Exchange was important. Fair. Level.
Just…transactions.
There were too many abandoned structures to choose from in all the dead towns you passed. Boots clacking endlessly. You two picked one and shacked up for the night. Eyes lifting to cracks above. You couldn’t help it still. Watching.
You weren’t sure you’d gotten used to it yet. The sky with all its colors. Clouds. Rain. Wind. Stars. And that sun.
Cooper called you a moron for staring at it once. Whoops.
“Well, hurry it up, darling.” His odd twang pulled your thoughts to focus.
“Yeah, yeah…” you grumbled there.
Coop shamelessly watched you undo some belts and clips to toss the armor piece off before you unzipped an outer layer and lifted your tank just to the edge of your bra. You realized it after and glared. Did anyone have boundaries out here?
“Plump thing still, aren’t you, Vaultie?” Coop had a needle in the dimming light. You scowled at him, leaning back into a tattered sofa. A rag cleaned some of the blood to give him a better look at the wound. Clean cut and beading up with red still. “Take a good long drink.”
Some amber liquid was pushed at you.
“We never had this in the Vault. They kept our organs clean and fresh.” You gulped too much down.
“Don’t finish it, idiot,” Coop snatched it and the remaining liquid was poured over the wound. You hissed but didn’t complain. He held a lighter to the needle and went to work without much warning. Your muscles all tightened as he pierced your flesh. “Could have been a Candyland. All the new shit for you to try out here.”
“Something like that.” You stared at his face instead of the stitches. Watched the muscles twitch about. The thickened skin of his blistered hands on your stomach. One pressing you down and the other with the needle. Coop decided to distract you and pull some info.
“So, what was it? The game your Vault played before you woke the fuck up?”
“We thought we were rebuilding the world someday. Turns out we were just…spare parts,” you admitted. He’d asked before and you snapped at him for it but the alcohol in your gut was too warm and the distraction was good actually.
Frankly, it didn’t matter now.
“Ah.”
“It was a big Vault. People seemed happy. And then they started going missing. Some came back from the med-bay. Some didn’t. They told us a bunch of different things but it boiled down to some illness sweeping or a few radroaches slipping in. Etcetera.”
“You believed that shit.”
“Like I said: Some people didn’t return but those that did, they were missing things. Eyes. Organs and pieces of organs. Arms. Even fingers. They had us giving blood regularly, saying it was for safekeeping. We were just a fucking organ farm for something bigger. I had three little siblings. They must have been matches for someone out there because they didn't return. The people that did come back were lied to. Told something was wrong with the part. It had to go.”
Coop paused because you vibrated. A shudder of burning rage shrilled up your bones. Another stitch followed so he spoke.
“You never won that lotto.”
“My mother found it out. Dad was one of the doctors and he started going mad. Probably the guilt. He put scalpels in his eyes. Mom told me the truth. Got shot getting me out the door. Maybe some of those idiots down there still don’t know they’re being bred specifically for harvesting. My mom was able to tell some and the Overseer tried to cover it, I'm sure. He was smart with words. Few families sat at their tables together and drank poison to escape when I was getting out. Chaos helped me get free. That’s all I know.”
“Figures, you fucking some of your pretty organs up as some revenge, huh?” Cooper’s skin always gave an odd twitchy stretch when he smiled.
“A little.” Your head fell back, eyes flickering from him to the sunset outside the cracked windows. Your voice changed, sounding almost pathetic for the first time. Almost sad. “Was the world always this fucked?”
He was silent for a long time. Recalling his era. Two hundred years ago before his flesh melted. Before the bombs fell. He almost lost that sarcastic edge to his tone.
“Yes. It was.”
“Did anything make it worth it?” You pulled further, needing something. Anything. Anything to validate your rage that burnt like the stars you counted every night. A hiss pulled up your teeth when pain shot along your side. One hand felt for his wrist and didn't let go.
Coop met your eyes with a hard stare and tied off the thread. You inhaled sharper when he leaned down real close to your skin and broke the thread with his teeth. He seemed to like the way you squirmed about. His hands pressed flush on your naked skin.
He hadn’t touched anyone like this in a good two hundred years. You figured that out easily. Neither pulling away. His head tilted.
“Yeah,” he rasped, “my daughter.”
Your lips opened and his hard look made you close them. It was a raw thing he offered in exchange for what you gave and you wouldn’t make him open that wound further.
You never asked again. You just slipped away from his wrist. Cooper rose and took a seat across the way, settling his hat back on. Boots crossed and he cradled a shotgun in his lap.
“Now, shut up,” he slouched, “go the hell to sleep.”
Almost startled, you wiggled back into your clothing and turned away from him to do just that. Both of you were furious. Alone in this shitty world. Alone together. Alive and clawing for answers.
Why. Why. Why…?
There were markets and bartering. Enemies along the road. Few dead ends. Few promising leads. Few “interrogations.”
You weren’t sure if you were good anymore. If you were the big sister who read your siblings to bed and tended to the Vault’s library. Coop gave you shit about that.
“A fucking librarian?” He laughed and laughed until he needed some chems. You called him a prick. He gave you a snort of white powder and then you were laughing too. Laughing the day away and getting high in an abandoned Super Duper Mart.
Music echoing through the aisles. You danced about and destroyed anything you got your hands on for fun. Chaos for the sake of it. Howling as you kicked over displays and took a bat to anything that could break. Coop had a thrill watching and joined in. You both considered it therapy.
Some days were easier than others.
A wail across the wastes alerted you to trouble. Cooper had your elbow before you could jog off. He tugged you into his side.
“Don’t be stupid.”
“They sounded like kids.” You yanked free and took off around an old gas station when the gunshots rang. When you heard the young voices begging. Begging to live.
Maybe the Wasteland hadn’t eaten all of you away. Hadn’t taken the guilt you carried too because you didn’t go back to your Vault. Didn't try to see who might still be alive even if that was a death wish.
The gunshots were already ringing again when Coop got you to slam you against the side of the station by your armor. His face was more twisted than ever. Teeth bared and clenched down as he shook you and whispered heatedly.
“You want to get yourself killed, be my guest-”
“There’s something over here!” Someone called and Coop looked irritated. Blaming you.
“You. Fucking. Bitch.”
“Please, you’re probably already hard thinking about the fight you have coming, asshole.” You shoved off him and pulled the gun from your hip. Blood boiling. Ducking, you avoided a blast so Cooper stepped out and blew someone’s head clean off.
He scoffed there. Almost bored.
“Next?”
He went ahead so you tailed and blasted some guy’s thigh apart. Counted four more. And then you saw them. Teens. Barely. Two of them sprawled dead across the ground. Still half-bound. Probably escaping. But, the collars were a telltale sign. Slavers.
“They were selling children,” you growled. “Fucking kids!”
Cooper was already aiming with swift feet. Slavers and Raiders were shitty shots. Something snapped inside you. Made you relive seeing the files and the names. The organs needed from each. Made you recall seeing the lab and all the preserved parts. Maybe your sibling’s parts were tossed carelessly in there too.
Like they never even existed. Like they were never human to begin with. No choice but to give and give until they die.
Bred to die and keep someone else alive. Probably just the highest bidder. A privileged asshole not caring where their meat came from. Not caring about the suffering and deaths of faces they couldn’t even see up close. For a second, you couldn’t move. You just saw red. Saw your mother sobbing as she explained. As she took bullets so you could be free.
Coop had turned his back to take one Slaver out when another stepped from hiding. Gun aimed at your companion's back. You were already dashing. Not bothering to reload. An animalistic screech erupted. The Slaver there was young like you. Maybe learning the ropes of their trade the same way you were. Terrified as you landed atop them.
“Please! Please, don’t-ack!” A rock you felt for with two hands came down. Almost took their jaw clean off. Skin tore. You kept hitting them. Everything else was white noise. You didn’t see a human there. They were just…parts. A collection of parts. Flesh. Bone. Blood.
Pulp.
Warmth splashed on your face. They were still gargling. What was left of their face trying to put sound and air together. You lost the rock and started using fists. Even came down and sunk your teeth into their cheek. Ripped. Yanked. Tore. Something stringy came free.
Wheezy gasps followed. You crushed their face in. Their neck. Their chest concaved. They might have been dead awhile. Covered in red. Tissue in your teeth. You threw your head back. Screamed. Maybe laughed.
A collection of sounds harrowing. Twisting together. Whatever was left of you. Whatever this new you that you were becoming. It all glittered and billowed like fire toward that sky you barely knew.
A fury. A terror. A lost soul.
More than the sum of your parts. You hoped.
Cooper didn’t stop you. In fact, he stood a few inches above the head and crouched down when it started. Watched closely as you came utterly undone. Watched you bash this poor bastard in with anything you could.
Maybe that made it less lonely. Your muscles constricted with soreness and you fell aside on your hip. Arms wobbling. Trying to keep you upright. Barely. Still making unsettling sounds between a sob and laugh.
Cooper just clasped his hands in silence. Watched still. Letting you finish breaking down. His head cocked.
Fascinated. Fascinated with you. All of you. All your parts. Even if they were as rotten as his in a way. Coop could have taken that shot in the back and you knew that. He knew that. You spared him still and you just wanted red.
Red. Red. Fucking red.
The whites of your eyes shifted and you were looking at him. Light, sound, and color seemed to return to the fissures of your brain. You realized how close he’d been to it all. Observing. Red splashed him too from the Picasso piece you carved yourself.
Cooper let you evolve. Enjoyed the show. He watched it live and in color.
Pure technicolor.
“Well, sweetheart, you feel any better?”
Your chest was rising and falling with hard breaths. Tears down your cheeks mingling with the blood.
“I just feel alive,” you said.
Freedom was so strange. Autonomy. You could do anything. Become anything. A vengeful god. A wanderer. A storm with sharp teeth that gnashed and tore.
You were alive and so many weren’t. That would always unsettle you to the core.
Cooper did something funny before he could stop himself. He leaned in. Took your face with a gloved hand. Tilted it aside as your eyes darted. And then he licked up the dripping red. You didn’t even cringe. You let him because it was a curious thing.
He smacked his lips a few times and let go. Tasted your vengeance and rage that bled over the edges of your existence. Seemed to like it.
“Well, you go clean yourself up in there and I’ll cut myself a snack for later,” Cooper rose to kick the body over, “can’t let the meat go to waste.”
Fucking Ghouls.
His hand extended and you stared at it before you took it. Coop helped you to your feet as you staggered into him. Fingers grasped at his shoulders and he tensed but let you cling for a second. You had to remind yourself that you weren’t floating away and then you let go before he shrugged off his tattered jacket.
“Go on. Git,” he dropped the heavy fabric over you, “this’ll take me a hot minute. Gonna get the tender cuts. You'll try it eventually.”
You blinked up at him. Few times.
“Well? Get your pretty ass in gear and fuck off already.” Cooper had a knife out to flay himself some meat. You clutched at the jacket and turned. Sniffled.
“...Thank you.” Your steps shifted.
Coop didn’t reply but you heard the slicing still before it continued after a beat.
You didn’t speak much for a good three days. Figured it would give him some peace but it grated. Everything you did annoyed him which was a laugh. Traveling to iffy destinations continued regardless and so did stopping for a fight or some casual looting.
“Hey, librarian,” Coop appeared around a corner aisle and smacked something against your chest, “it’s not exactly a book but it’s legible. Sorta. Use your imagination.”
You observed it. Some old fashion magazine. Men and women with mechanical smiles. Styled perfectly. Poised and perfect. You thumbed through it. Coop went a little out of his way to find you something stimulating. Something you might like.
“Is this you being thoughtful?”
He was already walking away but his hand lifted to flip you off without looking. You snickered in response but caught up to his right.
“All these colors. Better than that stupid blue and yellow,” you remarked. His shiny, dark eyes slid toward you. “Whoa…” You pushed it open to see the silken nightgowns. Short and lacy.
“Not bad.” His steps continued as he glanced.
“Did women wear these to bed back then?”
“It didn’t stay on long.” He laughed at the choking sound you made. One hand rolled the magazine to whack his arm for that. “You asked, Vaultie. Now I'm picturing you in the red one. I might like it.”
“I hate you.”
He smirked at you. Almost enchanted if he had that mode.
“Good.”
** ** **
You weren’t sure if you cared about being good. Not anymore. You cared about living. Sure, you didn’t hurt innocents outwardly but you took a ruthless edge that was some getting used to. Cooper was a duck to water with that.
You watched each other. A lot. You were his new favorite TV show. There was just something endearing about little, old you. This short, plump thing commanding the Wasteland without fear. Maybe you hid that well. Rage kept you going and it was enough. Little spitfire.
Cooper was someone to learn from. He knew all about the old world and new considering he lived in both. For a long, long time. He knew every weapon there was and how to handle them. How to move like it was a dance when he was killing people. You both smelled like rust. It was shockingly easy to get used to.
Ghouls were fascinating. You asked him a lot of questions when there was nothing else to do. As long as it wasn’t personal, he didn’t give two shits.
And you kept each other alive which was a strange, intimate thing. Even in ire and even if it was a transaction. Was it a transaction still? You brought him more chems. He took some bullets for you. Shrugged it off because Ghouls can handle that sort of thing.
You fulfilled each other’s needs. Well, most of them.
God damn it.
Cooper really looked at you…a lot. And you stared too, but not because his appearance that scared too many others. This was something new and clockwork in your life. Keeping each other alive. Standing guard. Sharing old shacks. Food. Water. Lamplight.
Finally, you admitted something when the moon was high. The buzz of a lamp between you while you both dined on what was left of some tough iguana meat.
“You know, I recognized you,” you said, “when you told me your name.”
“Well, whoop-dee-fucking-do.” He tore some meat apart with his teeth.
“Cooper Howard. Famous movie star. Maybe it was the lasso tricks too.” You actually smiled which was rare and he stared at it. “We had special movie nights in my Vault. Had some of your flicks. Made the kids go nuts. So many of them wanted to be real cowboys and girls. You were a bit of a hero to some of us.”
You met his eyes. Cautious. Unable to read his face.
"Well, now you know what a damn hero looks like."
“Did you like that? Being on the screen?”
“Until I didn’t.” He gave this laugh that was cruel and you liked it. “They say to never meet your idols. Guess they were right because you sure got the shit end of that, sweetheart.”
Heat prickled up your flesh. Like lava bubbling. Spilling into your cheeks.
“Did you have a big house?”
“Even had a pool and a dog.” He flicked his empty stick aside. You blinked a few times and offered what was left on yours. “Don’t be an idiot. You need it more. Eat the damn thing.”
With a drink of water, you finished and hugged your legs as you curled up. Both of you on the floor against ruined furniture. Another random thought pinged to the front of your brain.
“I like being able to wear what I want. Out here. Maybe that’s a pointless freedom but it’s something...” you admitted. He perked to see you so you went on.
“...I liked that about movies and books. Wearing whatever color or style you wanted. Never understood the uniform blue. All those horrible, pointless rules controlling us. Can’t even wear green, red, or even orange. Orange is my favorite color. It was the first color I saw when I left the Vault.”
Cooper gave this funny, glazed look like he was remembering something stark. Something from when his skin was smoother and maybe he was more hopeful. He brought his knees up and propped his arms on them to lean forward.
“It paid the bills. Movies and lasso tricks.” Coop plucked up a bottle nearby and opened it to inhale before he drank. Large gulps before he observed you and offered it out. Not caring, you drank too. Something smoky and burning as it went down. Scotch maybe, although you only tried that once.
“You wanted more though? Something your heart was into?”
“You don’t know what the hell I wanted,” he snapped.
“Of course I don’t, asshole. I'm not a worm in your fucking ghoul brain.” You were level, amusing him again as the bottle pushed back in his direction. A clear peace offering. Cooper settled.
“Got tired of it all. Maybe I screwed myself wishing for an out into something else,” he scoffed. Another drink. Back and forth. “Although, I could wear what I wanted. Guess we took that for granted. Your Vault was gonna slice you all open, they should have let you wear fucking green. Or red. Or orange.”
“Yeah.” You sniffed, eyes on the lamp again. Cooper shifted across the way. Light playing on your faces. More drinks followed.
Silent, you got annoyed reaching and scooted to his side. Cooper seemed surprised but didn’t move.
“I thought I was going to work as that librarian forever. Vault-Tec had us convinced we were happy down there in all that shit and ignorance. And that kind of evil feels worse than anything.” You laughed. You laughed loudly. Like you both were already dead and that was freeing. He chuckled too. “I liked your flicks. They were an escape and I didn’t even know it. And you had hair.”
Playfully, you flicked the rim of his hat just barely and he smacked at your knuckles.
“Get fucked.”
“You first.” You hitched and seemed to forget your next thought when he had your chin. Coop leaned in with his gravelly voice all low. Almost making you feel the buzz of alcohol sloshing.
“Darling, you’re getting a mouth on you. You know that?”
“I’m very into freedom now, Coop,” you uttered dumbly. It was a rare time you used his name and that registered in his eyes.
The world was ugly but you still had that. Small freedoms between all this rage and chaos. There was no letting that go. Maybe it was the closest thing to hope now even if it was more destruction. More hatred. More pieces of yourself lost to wind.
Ironic, considering your Vault.
Cooper held your jaw there. One gloved thumb traced a circle into bone while he drank again with his eyes on yours. Unyielding. Maybe curious. Your pupils blown with a quiver of your lips before you opened so he tilted to dump some alcohol into your mouth next. Something stirred. You both licked your lips all slick before he mashed down.
Traces of burning liquid on tongues. Scorching. Rustic kisses of sweet rot. You pushed up into him and got into his lap. Cooper broke the kiss defensively. His hand on your throat. Gruff.
“Don’t you play with me,” he whispered while you were pawing and brushing your mouth still into his, “don’t play with me here.”
“I’m not,” you flashed your teeth when his fingers pressed down, “shame I can’t wear the red thing from that magazine.”
“I’m more interested in what’s under it.” He brought you in for a better taste. Well, as much as a ghoul could taste. He had imagination still. He pictured you in the red a lot while staring.
Your hands lifted when he let you go. His eyes darted a little, anticipating your touch. Fingers slid up his jaw until you had his face in your palms. Experimental touches upon his skin. Thick like a full body callous.
Coop’s hat fell off when you came down. His air caught at the feel of your hips pushing down into his. Already needy. Already seeking more. The touch of another was rare out here. Gentle touch, to be clear.
Your hands that bashed a skull in. They held him like he might shatter. Briefly, Cooper thought he might. You didn’t care that he felt like exposed muscle and twisting tree bark. Didn’t care about the world in shambles. Didn’t care that you were a murderer and a violent dog that bit now.
Why were you doing this?
Because you could.
Because he felt great.
Because of freedom.
Fingers left him so you could undo some belts and push your leather pieces off. You went for the buttons and zippers down your front. Pausing, you looked at him with his intent stare and mouth parted. Drinking you down and you were fully clothed. His hands on your hips, a quick jerk brought you in for a slow grind.
"Feel that?" His mouth touched your jaw. Your eyes fluttered.
"I want it."
As you leaned in again, he made a sound. Observed you. A thought in his eyes.
“So, you Vault girls-”
“I’ve had sex before. A one-time thing to get it over with. They would have started the pairing and breeding thing soon enough. It wasn’t as good as anything I read. The sex.”
“Ah,” the frank answer had him amused, “just making sure I ain’t doing all the work.”
“Ass. I know how,” you cocked a sly grin, “do you remember how?”
Maybe you had him there so he switched gears to the usual crude sarcasm.
“You talk too much, Vaultie.”
“So shut me up or see what other sounds I make,” came the teasing. His palm cupped the back of your skull to bring you down. Lips colliding. Your hands clutching his shoulders to push the coat away. Broad palms cupped the fullness of your hips and ass shamelessly. He kissed your neck. Your pulse. Grinding you down still.
And then you moaned. A low, pretty sound that made him feral. Pun intended.
Cooper inched aside to ease you off with a pat on your hip. A command followed.
“Up. Now.” That was all he managed. You both stumbled about. Feeling around. Still palming aimlessly. He draped his coat over the sofa. Kissed you hard. A few belts dropped from both of you. Metal clicking about. A spit trail between your mouths upon parting when you got pushed into a rickety table.
“Easy now. We’re just starting. Savor it.” Coop stared at your hazy eyes while he opened your pants. Loose clothing on your bodies. He cupped you for a deep rub until you braced forward into him. Legs parting. Arms locked around his shoulders until you buried your face into his collar.
“Atta, girl.” His voice buzzed in your ear. Another moan muffled. Fingers left you and then pushed slowly into your underwear. A shockwave ran through you as he sought your clit. Went further and pushed a finger into your wet opening. He cursed you for that. For feeling so damn good.
“Cooper!” You cried out at last. Riding his fingers. Whining pathetically for him as he pulled from you.
“Not sure why you ain’t undressed yet.” One hand pressed the small of your back so your bodies were flush for the next rough kiss. You responded almost in a frenzy. Pulling your layers off. Only breaking so he could help get fabric over your head.
He kept trying to see your eyes between the beats. It was over two centuries since he’d been desired. Since someone so soft longed for him. Your pants and underwear slid down as he came to his knees. For you. Hands on your chubby thighs. All the curves of you bared for him. Fingers worked to massage circles into your skin. Moving higher.
Coop lifted his eyes after a long look at you spread open there. Prettiest thing he’d savored. And he wanted more too.
“I’m gonna eat your pussy now, darling,” he pushed his mouth into your wet sex with no more warning. You’d seen him eat human flesh before but this. Oh, fuck.
You both were so fucked.
“Fuck!” You prayed the table wouldn’t give out as it rattled with you braced on it. His tongue fucking into you and lapping your clit. Sucking. One hand touched his shoulder. Hips rocked. Urging his mouth flush into you for more. Eating you had his wet tip throbbing. You were shattering him to pieces.
“That’s it, feel your way into me,” he praised you. Delved into your folds while he spread you open just a little more. Loud, wet kisses. Your slick dribbling from his mouth and chin. He fucking devoured you. Two murderers. Savoring pleasure between them.
You might have let him eat all the way through you if you could. Crying out while the sun went to rest. Both of you caught in the glow of a dying lamp.
Coop took the dare to heart. Eliciting sweet sounds. Working you up and stopping to be an asshole. Working you up even more. Kissing your thighs and going back. Slow laps until you were desperate. He moaned into you.
“I can’t take it, Cooper, get back up here.” You had his collar in your fist. Tugging. Needing. He chuckled into your kiss while you came up from the table. Your hands pushing his clothing down now.
“It’s not pretty under all this, you know.”
You leaned out. All kiss-swollen and out of air. Lips pecked his mouth and jaw. His bare chest. You wondered if it hurt sometimes or if too many nerves were fried. Your skin was covered in bruises and scars. A collection of new memories since you left your Vault. His hand lifted as you observed his body and he touched your chin.
There was something validating about traveling with Cooper. Sure, he was a killer and a dick, but there was something unmistakably safe growing in you when he was near. A strange security beyond vengeance, Jet, and caps. A validation. A hunger for whatever freedom might bring you next.
Briefly, your eyes lifted to the stars dotting between all the holes in the roof. You liked the sky. Liked the reminder that you escaped and survived something horrible. Maybe your survival could amount to something bigger for others.
Later.
Small freedoms and small victories were worth it now. You nuzzled into his rough hand. Let his fingers trace the swell of your mouth and cheek. He looked at your body. Fleshy and scarred. Torn apart and sewn back together. More than a collection of parts. A name and a face and eyes that sparked new fireworks.
Cooper lost things like tenderness to the wind. He thought. Until…
“Let me feel you, Coop,” you uttered there in the buzz of pulsing lamplight. His mouth opened upon yours. Hands feeling up until he had your full breasts in his palms. You came up on your toes. His arms around you while he craned down. Mouth all over your neck and chest.
Cooper savored you. Feeling everywhere. Slow and deliberate. Traces of his touch burnt all over your skin. Taunting until you were crawling onto the couch. Braced on the edge with your ass in the air. Thighs parting for him. You whispered something when he was behind you.
“Speak up, sweetheart, I’m over two hundred here.”
“Fuck me,” you urged, “please, I want you to fuck me.”
Nails tore into fabric when he plunged in to fill you up. Hands pressed into your hips. An arch curved you. He moved. Hard and shallow. Almost warming himself inside you. Feeling you tighten and want it.
“Yes!” Muffled pleas followed in a long string. You pushed back into his thrusts. So full, you could barely stand it.
“You just might be the sweetest thing I ever tasted since I turned,” he fucked into you with hard grunts, “look at how well you take me.”
Coop watched himself disappear into you. Skin slapping. Wet sounds thrilling him. He could have lived inside you.
He undid you. Made you whimper and moan. Thought about how sweet you'd look sitting between his legs with your big eyes on his. Your lips swallowing his cock down. Cum on your mouth and tits. He pulled out to push his dick between your cheeks while you panted. Almost in heat if that were possible.
“Fuck, don’t…tease me…”
“Tease?” He pushed your asscheeks together. Made a mess of you. Rubbed his tip back down between your folds, nudging your clit as you tried to rock down for more.
“You could always get back into my lap.” Coop spanked you. Felt your body jolt and curve up. Another one drove you wild. Thumbing your clit, a third followed. Too many sensations mingling. Fingers pushed inside, pumping slowly. Spanks vibrating.
You soaked him. Fuck. Cooper held your ass and leaned down to eat you some more. All swollen and wet. Fucked open. His mouth all over you. Shameless. Stimulation buzzing as you rocked back. He'd have you every way he could after this. Devour you after while you were still leaking his cum and spread open. Maybe in a nicer bed. Maybe you'd beg for him to fuck your mouth or ass when your pussy was too sore. You made him wild. You'd come to each other for release and pleasure. Get lost between sheets.
"You want to get in my lap, sweetheart? God damn, look at you dripping for it."
“You fucking… Sit back.” You pushed him into place. Coop was worked up but covering it better.
“Look how cute you are getting on my cock so desperately like you ain't able to live without it.” He was betrayed by a loud groan while you lined up and sank down on him. Already moving with your hands on his shoulders. Cooper watched your tits bounce, his arms up over the couch. Lust clouding. He actually whined your name so pathetically and you'd give him shit for it later. “Shit. Forget savoring, just ride me. That's it.”
Another spank riled you up.
Coop leaned in and hugged you closer. His face in your breasts. Kissing and nipping until you slowed. Rocking in rhythm with him. Both of you clinging to each other. So fucking close to the edge. Your nails drew blood into the tender skin of his shoulders. The wounds already fusing back together. Coop hissed, loving it. Filling you to the brim.
His hand felt between you. One nipple in his mouth while his thumb rolled over your clit. You scratched the fuck out of his back. Telling him you were gonna fucking cum all over his cock. Telling him he felt so fucking good. You could barely take it. His voice in your ear, urging you on while he bucked up into you.
"Don't worry, darling, we'll be doing this again and again. Your pretty pussy won't know anything else. Won't want anything else. I'll take good care of you," he pinched your nipple idly. Admired your full body.
You ruined him. Your body that would be his solace and his coffin.
Cooper lifted and grazed his teeth into your neck. Bit down while you cried for it. Bouncing and cumming in his lap. He drew blood. Lapped at it. Admired the mark while you were still shuddering. Cooper pulled you all the way down. Hushing you. Falling back into the sofa while he seized up. A few telltale jerks before you were slumping into him.
Both of you just pulled in some air. Wrapped together. You nudged your head into his collar. One hand felt up his neck and jaw. Almost a strange consoling motion. He froze and contemplated it before sinking down a little.
“I did win that lotto. The organ lotto,” you admitted in darkness because the lamp was near dead. Cooper puffed. “My mom found my name on the list. Found out why they took my siblings. The frenzy started and then my escape before the surgery could happen.”
“Is that right?” His fingers drew up your back. “Which part?
Exhaling cooler air, you came out. A beat of searching. You both saw the shine of eyes in moonlight.
“My heart.”
Cooper hummed. His finger traced a line where they would have cut you open. Briefly, he leaned in and put his ear there. Listened to it beat. Still ticking stronger than ever. Lips edged up your throat after a kiss on each breast.
“I can see why,” was all he offered in that low rasp.
Idle caresses of smooth and scarred skin were exchanged. You shifted off him so Coop slipped back with some adjusting. One arm behind his head while you settled atop him. His jacket pulled over you both. Tense, he settled and draped his free arm lazily over you.
“I’m glad I kept it. I guess that’s a weird thing to say.” I'm glad I survived.
“It’s not,” he decided. “You are weird and a little shit, but not for that fact.”
A small, breathless chuckle escaped you. Tucked into Cooper. Eyes on that pretty sky full of stars. Too many to count.
But, you had time now. As much as you could claw for. And maybe this world was ugly and terrible.
Maybe there were small petals in the wind growing up from rot and destruction. Maybe those petals would make life worth it even still. You were eager to find out. If anything.
Exploring that with Coop wasn’t half bad either. World was more exciting with you both in it. So, yes, keeping your heart was something hopeful beyond all your rage. That rage could be passion. One day.
Your reasoning was as easy as a new breath into your lungs. Lips lifted. Unable to help it as your rage gentled to rest for the night.
“I have the freedom to do whatever the hell I want with it now.”
Coop grinned in the dark. Both of you just watching the sky. Nothing else to give but see what tomorrow might bring. World was exciting that way.
“Course you do, darling. Already told you,” he murmured, “you just don’t give up.”
"Don't count on it."