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Noah didn't expect Mirage to drive him places as if he was just a car. In fact, Noah hadn't expected Mirage to stick around after he was rebuilt. Though the Autobots couldn't leave the planet, Earth is more than just Brooklyn, New York. He was sure they had better places to be or less inconspicuous spots to hide out.
Last time he spoke with Prime, Optimus had spoken more softly than usual and told Noah to keep Mirage out of trouble. Noah had a feeling that Mirage was very conspicuous no matter where he was (even in a high end parking garage full of other rich people's cars). As a rare sports car, he was an attention magnet, which is what led to a pretty common problem.
"Hey!" Noah shouted, walking as fast as he could through the parking lot with his arms full of groceries. "That's my car!"
A young man looked up from Mirage's spoiler without concern or guilt. "I was just checkin it out man. Nice ride. How fast have you gone in it?"
Noah did not answer, purposely shoving himself between the man and Mirage's bumper.
"We stick to the speed limits." Noah said.
The stranger made a face and walked away.
The driver's side door swung open on its own and Noah stepped in, closing it behind him and dropping the grocery bag into the passenger seat. He tried to shake off the annoyed feeling. He purposely has Mirage park at the back of parking lots to avoid people. Couldn't strangers just admire from a distance?
"What's up, Noah?" Mirage's voice said through the dashboard. "You could have told him we've done 200mph."
Noah lightly put his hands on the wheel for show as Mirage pulled out of the parking lot towards home. "That would have just made him stick around. Anyways, that's faster than your model should allow. Pretty suspicious, Raj."
"Only by a little bit! Party pooper." was Mirage's retort.
_______
On weekends when Mirage didn't need to report to Prime and Noah didn't need to work, help Reek, or watch Kris, they would take boys' trips out of town. Mirage would get too antsy stuck in city traffic, obeying speed limits, and hiding in the garage so it was more about the journey than the destination. Most of the time there was no destination, just a long drive to anywhere.
Usually, when people thought of New York, they thought of New York City, but the state has so much more to offer than that. It has two Great Lakes, inland waterfalls, forest, and mountains. Noah didn't know what Cybertron looked like, but he guessed it wasn't like this.
Mirage took whatever roads caught his interest, leaving Noah more than a little turned around. They always made it back by the end of the day though, so he wasn't too worried. (Except for the Niagra Falls trip. If Noah had known that was where they were going, he would have blocked out the weekend for it).
"Raj."
Mirage turned the radio down. "Yeah?"
"Are we anywhere near a gas station or a fast food joint? I could use a snack and a bathroom break."
Mirage hummed, calculating a new route. "I found a place. 8 minutes tops."
The town was small, yet busy, and had a few options to choose from. Noah settled on a fast food restaurant. He planned to quick go in, use the bathroom, grab some food to go, and eat at one of the outdoor tables so he could keep an eye on his car. Noah avoided eating in Mirage's cab as much as he could. Mirage allowed it, but it just seemed rude.
"Dude, you're going to need a wash," Noah said, eyeing the road dirt around Mirage's wheel wells.
Mirage blinked his headlights in agreement. Or rebellion. Hard to tell.
As soon as he left the building, Noah saw Mirage had once again attracted unwanted attention.
"Excuse me?" Noah did his best to keep his voice level and not cause a scene. "Get off."
The girls leaning on Mirage's hood taking a selfie did at least look sheepish, but ran away giggling, still in possession of the photo.
Noah inspected Mirage's hood and pulled out a soft rag he kept on him to wipe away any possible smudges they left behind.
"You're so dramatic, Noah," said Mirage.
Noah quickly glanced around to see if anyone had noticed the talking vehicle. "Doesn't that bother you? People treating you like an inanimate object?"
"I take it as a compliment. I am irresistible," Mirage said, twisting his front wheels back and forth, rocking his frame slightly. Noah imagined Mirage striking a pose in his root form.
Well, it bothered Noah.
______
It was Bumblebee's idea. Apparently there was some big international car show where brands would be displaying the newest cars on the market.
Noah wasn't super good with brands and models outside of the Autobots' alt forms. However, he could appreciate nice cars.
Though, he only had his eyes on one.
Was this technically a fashion show for them? Noah knew they could scan other cars and change models. Somehow he couldn't imagine Mirage as anything besides a Porsche 911.
Honestly, Noah thought it would be neat to attend, but chaperoning the Autobot's two most outgoing members was a tall order.
They parked next to each other in the expo parking garage. Noah immediately launched into the plan.
"I do all the talking. No talking to other people, no touching, no-", he broke off upon seeing Bumblebee's holoform exit the driver's side.
She was a fairly average looking girl, pretty, with dark hair and even darker makeup. The only thing that reminded him of Bee was a yellow Camero brand jacket.
"Really, Bee?" Mirage's holoform called, "Using your old girlfriend?"
She flipped him off. Not being able to conventionally talk had made the yellow mech an expert at human hand gestures, especially rude ones.
"I am much more creative than that," Mirage muttered, fishing for compliments.
"You look great, Raj," Noah agreed, even though he hadn't looked at him yet. Mirage's holoform never looked the same. He loved to experiment with different clothes, skin colors, and hair colors. He was always tall though, borderline unreasonably tall, and today he had matched the blue/silver jacket Noah was wearing.
The one he had picked up when Mirage was still a pile of scrap in the garage.
"Oh."
"Twinsies!" Mirage tried to punch Noah's shoulder, but the fist phased through.
"No touching!" Noah reiterated, snapping out of his surprise. The holoforms may look real, but the reality was they were just for looks. People would lose their minds almost as quickly as they would over giant alien robots, if they noticed.
Mirage and Bumblebee were pretty quiet, mostly communicating through their internal comms and occasional pointing. Noah did his best to not feel like a third wheel. Hard not to though when the other two had known each other for years (possibly decades? Hundreds?) And he's only known Mirage for six months and he was unconscious for a good part of that.
"So who's hotter: that one," Mirage gestured to a Porsche on display, "or me?" He winked, something he could not pull off very well in his usual form.
"I dunno know, Raj, this one is like 3 years newer," Noah said, pretending to study the other vehicle closely.
Mirage gasped. "How could you?! I thought we were boys?"
"I'm just messing with you," Noah resisted a friendly jostle, "Don't go changing models on me, I still have duplicate replacement parts."
They were a few hours into the show and Noah was just starting to wonder how long they'd be there. He loved that the other two were having a great time, but he was not a crowds person. Especially not when some one could expose the holoforms at any minute.
Overall, it hadn't gone as bad as Noah's worst case scenario. Mirage only had one person ask him if he played pro basketball and Bee only made one rude hand gesture. Noah ran interference when he could and the occasional phantom shoulder bumps went unnoticed due to the car ogling and the Formula One celebrity appearance.
While looking at a brightly colored exotic car, Mirage froze, his holoform fuzzing out for a second.
"You good?" Noah noticed his concentration had wavered.
"All good!" Mirage flashed a mostly convincing smile.
"What's going on Raj," Noah said firmly, slightly worried the bot's systems weren't up to this long of a holoform excursion yet.
"It appears we have some company," Mirage noticed Noah tense, "Don't worry, just another groupie checking me out. I'm handling it though."
"That's it! We're leaving!" Noah turned back towards the exit, not checking to see if the others followed or not. Of course Mirage would be spotted at an event full of car enthusiasts!
It took him longer than he liked to push through the crowd and to the elevator, all the while worrying about Mirage's definition of 'handling it'.
Speed walking, almost jogging to their parking spot, Noah stopped dead when he found out.
"Hey Babe, we were just talking about your work."
"What the fuck, man!" It was unclear if Noah was cussing at the two men touching surface-level parts under the sports car's open hood or at the holoform casually leaning against the car, allowing it.
Both parties looked equally startled.
"I'm sorry," Noah's tone implying that he was absolutely not sorry, "I need to have a word with my friend. Would you excuse us?" Noah's dark look had the strangers quickly finding something better to do.
"What is your problem Noah!"
"What is your problem Mirage! Trying to advertise that you're an alien disguised as a car?"
"All of my alien parts are carefully hidden under normal car parts as you should know." Mirage's holoform closed his alt mode's hood.
New people and Bee's holoform exited the elevator, pausing the argument.
"Get in the car," Noah ordered.
Mirage chose to let his holoform blink out of existence instead.
They drove back in silence.
Mirage wasted no time transforming as soon as the garage door closed, dumping Noah unceremoniously onto the concrete.
"Are you embarrassed of me? I know the deal was that you could sell me once we got back from Peru... I know I'm not the same..."
Noah was glad he was already on the floor. They didn't talk about this. Mirage had started up without even turning a key, ready to scare the shit out of Reek and had pretended like nothing had happened.
"...It's okay you're not a professional mechanic; we don't have a medic with us. You did your best and without you, I wouldn't be here right now!" Mirage's pacing caused the building to vibrate slightly.
Is that what Mirage thought this was about? That Noah was shooing people away because Mirage wasn't good enough to show off after being rebuilt?
"Transform back," said Noah.
Mirage's optics flashed with annoyance. "What?"
"Back into your alt mode," Noah said gently.
Mirage, rebellious, petulant Mirage, thankfully did comply with the sudden request.
Noah slowly walked up to the car. The only sound in the garage was of the Porches's engine ticking from the drive.
He ran a hand over the striped hood. "I custom cut these stripes."
Continuing down past the door, he rested his hands on the spoiler. "I spent hours watching countless YouTube videos on how to repaint cars and I painstakingly color-matched your original silver and blue."
Noah bent over, finding a part in the undercarriage. "I messed up the welding on this piece. You've healed over it, but I still know it's there.
I visited every scrap yard in a 100 mile radius to find replacement parts, because there was so little of you left."
He took a deep, shaky breath, completing the circle around Mirage back to the front. Noah slid his fingers under Mirage's hood to find the latch. It popped open on its own.
Wary of the hot engine, Noah reached deep into the internals until his arm was burried up to his shoulder and his face was mere inches away from getting burned. Even within its protective casing, Noah could feel its whirling energy.
"I held this every night praying I'd be able to bring you back," he whispered.
A familiar mechanical whirring caused Noah to jerk his hand back. Mirage was quickly standing in front of him, intake partially ajaw.
"I can't lose you again," Noah choked. "If anyone found out what you are, you'd have to leave."
He knew it was selfish, keeping a centuries old, sentient, battle-trained alien robot to himself for company, but he couldn't bring himself to care.
Mirage knelt in front of Noah, delicately resting his servos on his shoulders.
"I gave every piece of myself to protect you and I'd do it again. Your fingerprints are on my spark." Mirage lifted Noah's downcast chin. "I'm all yours and I'm not going anywhere, okay?"
"..."
Mirage leaned in, gently pressed the living metal of his derma to Noah's cheek. No rejection forthcoming, he moved to Noah's mouth, pressing more confidently.
Noah pulled away. "Mirage?"
Mirage backpedaled. "I'm sorry if that was wrong. I have taken you out for food, we've gone on scenic drives to romantic locations, I've tried flirting, we've slept together.."
Noah blushed. It wasn't like that; Mirage had pretty comfy seats and sometimes he stayed up too late at the garage…
"...literally everything human relationship articles have suggested. I'm really trying, but now I'm not so sure it's been working." Mirage was shy and nervous, not a look Noah saw often on him.
"You've been trying to date me, this whole time?!" Noah exclaimed, beginning to overanalyze the last couple of weeks.
"Yes? I even tried making you jealous when other people noticed me." Mirage lifted a servo to the back of his neck, ducking his helm. "That didn't go too well. Kissing was the last thing on my list, I'm sorry again if I didn't do that right either."
The mech started to make motions to stand again, waking Noah up from his reverie. Grabbing the top of Mirage's chest plating in an attempt to pull him back, Noah ended up being taken along for the ride 12 feet into the air.
Mirage's servo automatically grabbed his butt to keep him from falling. "Careful! You-"
Noah crashed their mouths back together, silencing Mirage's concern. Noah knew the kiss would have been considered sloppy by human standards, but there was no worry of his nose poking his dates's eye or of his teeth bruising a lip.
Noah broke away. "I'm sorry I didn't consider you to be more than a friend, didn't know that was an option." Now it was his turn to sound awkward, feeling guilty for not wondering more about Cybertronian culture.
Mirage lit up, emotionally and physically; the Y-shaped biolight on his chest briefly flaring. "So is that a yes?"
Noah rolled his eyes. "Yes Mirage, I am your boyfriend now, congratulations."
Mirage touched their foreheads together, optics closed, engine idling not unlike a content cat. "You've always been my boy, ever since I let you inside me."
Noah groaned. "Dude, you gotta stop saying that."
"But you look so cute when you're flustered! Anyway, don't think I didn't notice you wearing my colors or didn't hear what you said to me while you were putting me back together."
Noah's cheeks, which were already pink from the innuendo, became bright red. "That was in Spanish!"
"Which is just as easy to translate as English, sweetspark."
"Ugh, put me down!" Noah pushed against Mirage's headlights. "Need to go die from embarrassment."
"Te amo, Noah."
"I love you too Mirage."