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It is a well known fact that Warriors kicks in his sleep. Everyone knows this except for Warriors himself.
The topic has been broached on a few times, with someone slyly mentioning sleeping habits, when Warriors proudly proclaims how he sleeps on his back without moving. He claims being in the war has built the habit in him to sleep still. Much to the astonishment of the chain, he truly believes he doesn’t move in his sleep.
“Wait, you can sleep entirely still, for an entire night, and you don’t move?” inquired Four with an eyebrow raised. He looked skeptical, in part because he knows that the opposite is true, and is hoping repeating what Wars said will make him admit that he does not, in fact, sleep like a normal person.
“Well yes,” Wars starts, “when I slept in the barracks, the bunk beds were the cheapest quality possible, and every time someone shifted the bed would creak. It drove people crazy, and I tried to fix the problem on my end by sleeping still and hoped everyone else would follow suit.” He proceeded to drink the broth from his bowl, and failed to see the others all pass disbelieving glances. As mentioned earlier, everyone knew Warriors was absolutely restless in bed, and Sky had the bruises on his shins to prove it.
Warriors put his bowl down, and slapping his knees, he stood up. “Well then,” he said while stretching, “I am going to patrol for a second. Thank you for dinner Wild, it was perfect. I’ll be back in thirty minutes.” He promptly walked away, completely oblivious to the others trying to find a way to break the news to him that he is not, in fact, a calm sleeper.
When he was gone, Sky turned to the others and said, “I vote we don’t tell him. He obviously believes what he's saying, and it might come off as we don’t like sharing a bed with him when we room. He’d probably try sleeping on the floor so he doesn’t kick anyone and that isn’t an option.” Sky absentmindedly rubbed his shins as he said this, and everyone winced in sympathy as they processed what he was saying.
No one felt like opposing Sky, as the chain had all learned early on that he gets his way through being sweet and simultaneously terrifying, but Wind felt the urge to try and convince Sky to save all of them from the accidental beatings they would have to continue enduring if they did as Sky proposed.
“So you’re saying we lie to him so he doesn’t end up with a back worse than the old man at the expense of us being kicked?” Wind tried to make his plea sound like he was asking for confirmation on what Sky said as to not endure his retribution.
“Well Wind, what would you suggest instead?” Sky smiled at him, and to anyone else it would appear Sky was asking for other options. He was not. His smile was strained and Wind could see the darkness in Sky’s eyes. Wind tried his best to save his brothers, he really did, but he was not willing to die at thirteen years old.
“You’re right, Sky. This can totally be kept under wraps so that Wars doesn’t find out!” Just like that, Sky’s unsettling smile was replaced by a genuine one. Everyone let out the breath they had been holding as Sky's menacing demeanor evaporated into thin air.
“Well that's good we all came to a consensus!” He smiled at them, and stood up to walk towards his bedroll. “I will be going to sleep now. Wake me up if I have a shift tonight. Good night you guys!” He lay down, and the chain stared in amazement as Sky took one deep breath in and proceeded to pass out. The first few times this had happened, both Wars and Hyrule had run to him to make sure nothing was wrong with him. They had since learned that this was just a Sky thing, and that it was nothing to be concerned over. It was still unsettling to watch even knowing it was supposedly normal.
With Sky asleep, the rest of the chain turned to discuss the events that had passed. “If Sky is so hellbent on not letting Wars know, why don’t we force him to room with Wars whenever we sleep at inns?” asked Twilight.
“I would agree, but if we got paired with Wars and then volunteered Sky up as a sacrifice wouldn’t that start to look suspicious? He’s smart, he would catch on quickly.” Four thoughtfully added his advice, and they mulled over this fact as they all originally planned on letting Sky deal with the consequences of his decisions.
“Well! Thankfully we’re in my world and we are not anywhere close to a stable or inn, so I vote we ignore this until the problem arises,” Wild said with confidence as he started collecting bowls and spoons to be washed. It was a good way to distract people, as Twilight and Hyrule both quickly offered to wash the dishes he had been gathering, and the conversation was put in the back of everyone’s mind as they began to clean and settle in for the night.
The next day a portal appeared, and after it teleported them to a new location, Four was able to claim the world as theirs once he managed to open their eyes against the post-portal migraines, and they marched off in the direction Four said was closest to civilization. Despite Four telling the group they would make it to an inn before night, no one thought of the dilemma of the rooming situations.
It wasn't until Time and Wars were delegating who would room with who when the suspense and horror befell the group. Time seemed to smirk at them, knowing the pain he was causing them by purposefully revealing who would sleep with Wars last.
“So that leaves Legend and Wars to room together.” Time smiled at them, mischief evident in his eyes, before quickly retreating up the stairs to his shared room with Four. He was wise for escaping while he could, as Legend slowly processed the fate that had befallen him.
“Wait a second! Time, come back here! You can’t le-” he was promptly cut off by a hand over his mouth. Legend looked up to see Sky giving him one of his unsettling smiles and saying, “Legend, you know better than to yell inside, people could be sleeping,” He cocked his head, which would have been endearing if he wasn’t scolding Legend. “Lets calm down, it is pretty late now. Wild, what’s for dinner?” Just like that, Sky dropped his hand and smiled sweetly at Wild, who quickly hurried to make dinner.
Legend looked to the heavens, before remembering they never did anything for him, and looked at Hyrule instead.
“Please. Hyrule. You’re the kindest of us all, save me please.” Hyrule offered Legend a sympathetic shoulder pat and said, “I will heal you tomorrow morning, that’s the most I can offer.” He gave a smile and followed Wild out the door.
Legend slowly accepted his fate, and Wars came up to him and put an arm around his shoulder. “Well then, let's go check out our room.” The other heroes watched as Legend resigned to his fate as he followed Warriors up to their shared room.
Upon entering the small room, Wars smiled genuinely at him and said, “I forgot to mention earlier, I bought a new nail polish earlier if you would like to use it.” Legend quickly forgot about his previous plight, and returned Wars’ smile. “Pft, when have I ever said no to using your nail polish? It saves me rupees.” Legend claimed using Wars’ nail polish was to save money, but in reality, he loved the colors Wars picked out. Not that he’d ever tell him that. He had an image to maintain after all.
With dinner and the quick makeover session that ensued, it became evident it was time to sleep when Wars yawned. Just like that, Legend remembered how his night would not be peaceful. They got ready for bed, and Wars took the side next to the wall. Legend took a deep breath, and laid next to him. He heard a whispered, “Good night Ledge,” and Legend whispered a good night back. Legend took a look at Wars, eyes closed and laying on his back, and Legend accepted his fate, knowing that when Wars fell fully asleep his limbs would be everywhere. He laid down, and prayed to whoever would listen that he could sleep through the night. The fatigue caught up to him, and he slowly fell asleep.
It was still dark outside when Legend woke up. It was not a peaceful awakening, in fact he rubbed his head and realized he was on the floor instead of the bed. He took a deep breath and looked at Wars, who sure enough was laying like a starfish would, one leg over the bed frame. Legend pieced together that he was pushed off, but was too tired to enact a retribution. Still groggy, Legend pulled the blankets off of Warriors and tried falling asleep on the floor, his bad joints be damned. He refused to move onto the bed, knowing he would just be pushed off again. Legend let himself drift off to sleep once more, knowing he would pay the price for sleeping on the floor in the morning.
He woke up later when the light became too evident to ignore, and Warriors was gone. Legend internally cried as he stood up and got ready for the day, knowing that they were staying one more day, and would have to deal with Wars kicking him in his sleep for another night. As he walked down the stairs, it was to muffled laughter from Wind and Hyrule, as well as a threatening smile from Sky. Legend got the message, and knew he would have to carefully choose his words in the following conversation.
“Can you guys believe that Legend moves so much in his sleep that he fell off the bed? And he took all the blankets!” Wars teased Legend upon seeing him, ruffling his hair just to add insult to injury. Wind's muffled laughter became full blown laughter now, and Wars smugly smiled at him. Legend closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Then he took another. Sky’s warning smile lingered in his mind, and he opened his eyes and shrugged at Wars. “It was kind of hot, that’s probably why I moved a lot.” That put an end to the conversation, and Hyrule came over and healed his bruises as promised.
The wounds were gone, and Legend walked to Four quickly. Grabbing Four’s shoulders, he turned him around and whispered urgently, “Four, please. Please switch with me tonight. I will do anything, please.” Legend was tired and sore, and was willing to beg if it got him a full night's sleep. Four shook his head quickly. “I’m sorry, I can’t save you now.” He ran off before Legend could protest.
Four ran to Time, who began to list off the things that had to be done that day before they left the following morning. Legend was stubborn, and determined that he could survive one more night. In fact, he began planning to make his sleep actually restful that night just to spite the rest of his brothers. He would show them that he could sleep with Wars and get a full nights rest. After considering and contemplating, he settled on the easiest but probably most humiliating option. It didn't matter anymore.
Come nightfall, Wars and Legend separated to their room once more, and as they laid down, Legend began his plan that would allow him to sleep without being thrown off the bed. He was determined to sleep no matter the cost, even if the cost was his dignity. The image he tried to maintain? It didn't matter anymore. He was tired and sore, nothing else mattered to him but sleep. Wars said good night, and once Legend was sure he was asleep, Legend shifted his arm underneath Wars’ head and rested his other arm over Wars' torso. Legend swallowed his embarrassment and accepted that he was comfortable and warm now, and that cuddling Warriors would hopefully keep him from shifting too much.
Legend had assumed Wars was asleep until he heard a soft, “Um, Legend?” Legend quickly cut him off by saying, “Shh. Go to sleep.” Wars shifted a bit, and hugged Legend back, and they promptly fell asleep.
Legend woke up to giggles. Which was odd considering the pitch was higher than Warrior’s voice, and he didn’t remember switching rooms. As the grogginess began to ebb, he started to remember that indeed, he hadn’t switched and he planned extensively to get a full night's sleep. He quickly opened his eyes and tried to turn towards the noise, but realized he was pinned in place by an arm around his torso and a head on his bicep. Legend was able to swallow his embarrassment last night for the sake of peace, but now he was unable to stop his blush for being caught cuddling his brother.
He finally heard clear words amidst the laughter, “Got tired of the kicking?” came the amused voice of Time. He wasn’t eloquent enough to tell them to fuck off and let him sleep, so he groaned and lifted his arm just enough to give them all the middle finger. He heard a click, and turned as quickly as he was able to, seeing Wind laughing while pointing his pictobox at them. Wars began to stir at this point, and he appeared just as groggy as Legend first did upon waking. He sat up, stared at the chain, then at Legend, and everyone could see the gears turning in his head.
“Hey Legend?” he finally asked, breaking the silence that had befallen. “Yes, Wars?” came the reply. Legend tried to look as nonchalant as possible, failing miserably. Wars decided to take pity on him, since he had never slept that well in his life. “It’s nothing. What’s the plan for today?”
Legend quickly stood up, and Wars followed suit. The chain left their shared room so they could get ready, and Wars said, “You know, if you’re feeling touch starved, you could’ve said. I enjoyed cuddling, and if you need it we can do it more.” He looked so sincere it physically hurt, and Legend accepted that he would probably be roomed with Wars for the rest of his life at inns, and said, “Yeah ok. That sounds nice, thank you.” Legend was right, as the chain from there on always roomed Wars and Legend together. If there was any protest, Wind was quick to show his black mail picture, which ended all arguments. Legend supposed there were worse fates than having to cuddle his brother to avoid bruises and aches.