Archive of Our Own ^beta

It started off with her approaching Dalisay with the need for refresher lessons in classic literature. That in and of itself wasn’t odd: it was expected someone such as the Princess of the Fire Nation be well versed in all subject matters. Dalisay was a knowledgeable scholar in the field and would be more than happy to assist the princess. The internal alarm bells weren’t set off then, rather all that followed after.

Very scarcely did Princess Zeisan have particular questions when it came to reading and analyzing the material. She did pay diligent attention to Dalisay’s instruction, content on listening to her talk, only few menial questions and comments sprinkled about in their lessons, prone to diverge from the topic at hand.

It was the way she occasionally toyed with the books and scrolls in the library as they paroused the inventory to study. Princess Zeisan’s index and middle finger would finely glide across the edges of the paper with the occasional flicker as a tease.

The crisp crinkling sound of paper made Dalisay’s ears perk up to her.

It was the way the princess’s amber eyes turned to a darker and more potent color as the two read and discussed literature. The occasional pulling of her lower lip between her teeth, focusing on Dalisay’s voice, her lips, and her eyes moving across the paper going into lengthy discussions of the symbolism in word choice and historical choices in the works they were reading at the time.

Halfway through reading, Dalisay impromptously stopped, and squeezed her eyes shut. As if studying what was behind her eyelids. Her reading spectacles were carefully extracted from resting on the bridge of her nose to rest on her left side of the table. A few flyaways were tucked behind her ear and she eventually matched Zeisan’s gaze across the table.

Zeisan smiled softly, awaiting her. Almost innocently.

“... You don’t need any help for tutoring, now… do you, Princess Zeisan?”

Her smile grew wider, as if she was finally able to indulge in a long anticipated treat. “Please, drop the ‘princess’ title. We are past that. You may call me Zeisan. And regarding your question, that’s not it at all. I do actually need tutoring. It is simply–” 

Dalisay stiffened, feeling the added pressure of the toe of one of the princess’s shoes toying with the inside of her calf.

“I could use your tutoring with something more than what is laid out on the table.”

Dalisay’s breath drew out in a long exhale. The void in her lungs allowed her to feel her heart thunder in her chest as a drum. 

She wasn’t sure what to think. For someone of her status to be propositioned by the Fire Nation princess? What would come of it, if anything? 

A scandal, she was sure of.

Dalisay was to be her tutor. Nothing or no one more or less. And what if her father, Fire Lord Taiso, found out? What would he and Fire Lady Hazei think? While he’s been known to be an understanding and reasonable man, in any circumstances revolving matters of the heart and succession, one was to be especially delicate with such matters.

Dalisay let out a sudden sharp gasp.

Zeisan retracted her foot for another touch pulling Dalisay from her spiraling reverie. Slender and well manicured fingers which previously flirted with the texts before her were already interlaced with her tutor’s. 

Dalisay couldn’t help but consider her own hands, slightly calloused from years of metalwork and personal training.

The contrast… it perturbed her. Fed into her fears of what would happen if she gave voice to the single word on the tip of her tongue both she and Zeisan wanted to hear.

But at the same time… she was enthralled at the opportunity to be this close to Princess Zeisan. A privilege very few got to have.

Returning the seemingly small gesture of affection, Dalisay offered a soft smile, and whispered the one word that would open up the world to the both of them.

“ Okay .”

***

And thus began their relationship. A budding flower, small, frail, yet eager to bloom to its fullest extent.

While Zeisan eventually gave up the jig that she didn’t actually require additional need in reviewing classic literature, they still kept the tutoring time blocked off. It was an undisturbed two hours out of the week where they would be able to have alone time couples were often supposed to have. Though segregated to the libraries about The Caldera, these “dates” didn’t venture to escalate past stolen glances, interlocking of the other’s pinky, and secret opportunities to kiss in the isolated and hardly explored sections of the libraries.

But Dalisay wanted more. 

She wanted to be able to experience what it is like to be more than a secret. To have future plans in creating a life together.

Such needs and desires were expressed to the princess. Zeisan understood completely and felt the same way. They soon worked their way up to having more public outings together. Having more frequent opportunities to integrate into each other’s lives. Dalisay’s scholarly expertise was appreciated more in the upper ranks and Zeisan openly expressed appreciation and admiration of her girlfriend’s skills. 

Under one of the trees by the pond in the Stone Camelia Gardens, Dalisay’s lap embraced the weight of Zeisan’s head as she laid supine before her. Lightly brushing Zeisan’s silky hair with the back of an index finger, Dalisay quietly admired how the sun’s rays cast shadowy patterns of the tree’s leaves on her girlfriend’s face. 

Watching rose pink lips loosely parted in Zeisan’s light breaths, a not insignificant part of Dalisay was drawn to them in that moment.

Still maintaining the stroking pattern of her finger along her girlfriend’s hairline, Dalisay began to lean over. 

Closer.

Closer.

Right as Dalisay’s lips were but a few centimeters above Zeisan’s, several words stopped her in her tracks, erecting a wall between her and her destination.

“I want to leave.”

Taken aback by the sudden turn in conversation, Dalisay had to give Zeisan space to explain what she meant by “leave.”

Even as princess of the Fire Nation, Zeisan had to admit to herself that there was nothing more for her. Succession of the throne was already handed to Sozin the moment he had the tell-tale pediatric fever indicating a budding fire bender. 

Nevertheless, she was still confined to responsibilities of being a member of the Fire Nation during her formative years. But she was much the adult now. There was more to explore, more of the world to see outside of the archipelago of the Fire Nation. 

Dreams and fantasy novels could only take her mind so far before she had to wake up to her reality.

A pivotal point was reached when she didn’t want to open her eyes to the mundane about her.

The time to move was now or never.

And she wanted Dalisay to come with her.

Dalisay bit her lip. She didn’t know what to think. She had her whole life here. Her metallurgy work would likely not be so successful in areas of the world less industrialized as the Fire Nation. 

And she loved Zeisan, she really did… but this was impractical. 

Wasn’t it?

Moving from the more cushy life as a member of the Royal Family to… a civilian of whatever nation she chose to reside in? Dalisay had to provide the voice of reason. 

Plus, she herself was moving up in her scholarly work and getting recognized by more important figures. She didn’t want to let that go recklessly. She couldn’t.

Zeisan and Dalisay had their spats over the months, as any normal couple did, but this was their first serious fight. With no immediate resolution coming from the argument, they thought they needed space to cool off. 

That space… that distance between them… it grew wider with each passing day. The spare glances to each other were cool, the brushing of the other’s hand fewer in frequency. Dalisay couldn’t help but wonder if the gap between them was too wide to overcome.

When one day she caught Zeisan getting too close to an Air Nomad nun traveling on a visit, it only affirmed the horrid thought that nestled in the back of her head some time back.

Maybe they would be able to give Zeisan the freedom and liberty she craved, she thought bitterly before walking away. For good.

The heartache was drowned out by excessive indulgence in her hobbies and work. Reading, studying, metalwork, practical strategy, repeat. 

Reading, studying, metalwork, practical strategy, repeat. 

The solid clink of a chrysanthemum tile on the Pai Sho board game ahead of her blinded Dalisay from her surroundings, already planning her next several moves.

It wasn’t the voice per se, but rather the looming shadow cast over her board that made Dalisay look up and frown, despite the cheshire grin presented before her.

“Do you want to be playing alone?” Prince Sozin asked.

A rhetorical, yet loaded question. She and his sister had long broken up at this point. What business could he have with her? Even when together, they weren’t particularly close with Sozin. There was a heavy second before Dalisay silently gestured to the empty space opposite her.

Without missing a beat, Sozin made himself comfortable on the floor cushion, taking the next move. “I have a proposition for you.”

Her next tile clicking on the Pai Sho board amplified her quirked brow on cue. 

The game continued on in a smooth dance between Dalisay and Sozin while they debated his proposal.

“I win,” Sozin soon declared.

Checking the board as if needing to affirm his victory for herself, Dalisay let out a light huff before leaning back, placing her weight on the heels of her hands.

Tipping her head back, chin to the sky, Dalisay quietly admired the clouds floating by.

If Zeisan could have a new beginning of her own, then maybe she should, too.