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Adora Gray fell in love when she was six years old.
That’s too early, some might say. You were too young to know that. But she knew. She knew on the first day of first grade, when she looked into the blue and amber eyes of the girl sitting next to her, that she was in love. Even if she was too young to know what that meant.
“I like your name,” she said during snack time. The girl gave her a suspicious look.
“Are you making fun of me?”
“No!” Adora said quickly. “I think your name is really pretty.”
The girl narrowed her eyes, clearly trying to see if Adora was picking on her. But finally she said, “I like your name too.”
By the end of snack time they were laughing together, and Adora knew she would do anything in the world to hear Catra’s laugh.
Adora Gray was seven years old when she realized she would fight the world to protect Catra.
They weren’t in the same class that year, but they had recess at the same time, and that was good enough. They would always sit on the swings together, daring each other to go higher and higher or just talking about their days. They always moved if someone asked to use a swing, because they knew how to share. And they could find somewhere else to hang out for the rest of recess.
There was a boy in Catra’s class who loved to pick on her. He made fun of her name, her eyes, her height, whatever he could. Catra had already gotten in trouble for throwing things at him, but for some reason he was allowed to keep bullying her. Adora hated that.
One day the boy decided to shove Catra off the swing while she and Adora were talking. He hadn’t asked them to move. He didn’t even want the swing. He just wanted to push Catra and hurt her.
Adora immediately jumped off her swing and shoved him back, hard enough to knock him over. He wasn’t hurt, but he was stunned and immediately started crying. Catra hadn’t even cried when he had pushed her face first into the ground. Teachers descended on them, and parents were called.
“While I understand that Adora shouldn’t have gotten physical,” Randor told the principal, “I have to wonder why it was allowed to get to this point to begin with. Adora’s told me this boy has been bullying her friend since the beginning of the school year.”
“We’ve spoken with him about it—”
“And clearly that’s not working if he thought it was okay to walk up to her on the playground and push her off the swings. I hope you plan on actually doing something about the bullying now that it’s gotten to this point.”
Adora wasn’t allowed to go out for recess for an entire week. But Catra later told Adora that she thought it was really cool Adora had pushed the boy back, and that was all Adora needed to hear.
Adora Gray was nine years old when she realized Catra’s home life wasn’t like hers.
She was ashamed of herself for being so oblivious for three years. The signs had been there. Sometimes Catra didn’t have lunch or lunch money. Sometimes she had bruises that she would hide. Adora never saw her or her mother at Parent Nights. She had never been to Catra’s house.
Catra spent a lot of time at her house though, and it made Adora wonder if her parents knew something was wrong.
“It’s snowing!” someone shouted halfway through a math lesson, and that was the end of the day. The teacher gave up, and Adora immediately zoomed across the room to Catra, who was sat in a different pod (they weren’t allowed to sit together).
“Do you want to come over? I bet Mom will make hot chocolate.”
Catra perked up a little. “Sure.”
Parents were called around lunchtime. No one questioned Catra sneaking off with Adora when Marlena arrived to pick her up. Adora wondered if Catra’s mother had even answered the phone.
“Catra, where’s your coat?” Marlena asked when she saw Catra wearing nothing but a sweatshirt. “It’s freezing out.”
Catra’s shoulders hunched up a bit. “I don’t have one,” she muttered, looking at her shoes. Marlena’s expression got a bit funny in a way Adora didn’t understand, but she didn’t say anything else.
They spent a few hours watching the snow build up outside until there was enough to go out and play in.
“Catra?” Marlena called from the basement. “Can you come here for a minute?”
Catra immediately tensed up. Adora took her hand and led her down to the basement, where Marlena was waiting with a plastic tub of Adora’s old coats. She smiled when she saw how nervous Catra was.
“You’re not in trouble, sweetie. I just want you to try on this jacket and see if it fits.”
Catra frowned, but took the offered jacket and pulled it on. Marlena helped her zip it up, then tugged at the sleeves a bit as she looked it over. “Seems like a good fit. How does it feel?”
“It’s good,” Catra said quietly.
“Perfect. Come on.”
They went up to the guest room next. There was a dresser full of things Adora’s grandmother had made for them over the years. “Mom will never believe we have enough hats and gloves,” Marlena said as she pulled out a pair of red knitted mittens with a matching hat. “Let’s see how these fit you.”
They fit great, and red was a really good color on Catra. Marlena finally released them to go outside and play, satisfied that Catra was equipped for the cold.
The snow didn’t let up for three days. Catra ended up spending the entire time at Adora’s house, and Adora didn’t remember her mother calling even once to check on her.
Adora Gray was thirteen years old when her life came together and fell apart, all within a month.
Thirteen was such a weird age. They were getting ready for high school, were even at the high school already in a separate transition wing, the kids in their classes were starting to “date,” and Adora was realizing for the first time that she really had no interest whatsoever in boys.
“I thought the kid who wanted to sing to you was a real winner,” Catra said with a snicker as yet another dejected boy walked away from their lunch table. Boys never asked Catra out.
“Shut up,” Adora grumbled, shoving Catra’s shoulder. “It’s not funny.”
“That’s your opinion.”
“Um, Catra?”
They looked up to see a girl standing next to Catra’s side of the table, tapping her fingers together and looking nervous. “Yeah?” Catra asked, raising an eyebrow.
“I was just wondering, if you um… if you’d like to go to a movie with me?”
Jealousy reared up so suddenly that it made Adora dizzy. Who did this girl think she was, asking out Catra? How dare she!
“No, thank you,” Catra said simply, returning her attention to her lunch. The girl looked horribly dejected as she walked away. Catra peeked at Adora out of the corner of her eye and smirked. “Jealous?”
“No!” Adora said, loud enough to attract attention from nearby tables. “Why would I be?”
“I dunno. No girls are coming over to ask you out.”
“Well I’d say no to them too.”
Catra blinked, surprised. “You would?”
“Yes! I don’t want to date them either.”
Catra’s expression was unreadable as she searched Adora’s face. “Do you… want to date anyone?”
Adora could feel her face burning red, but did her best not to look away. “One person.”
“Who?”
She didn’t answer, and they didn’t look away from one another, even as the bell rang to signal the end of lunch.
Their next class was Biology, which they had together, and the teacher even let them sit together at one of the work benches. About ten minutes into class, Catra snuck her hand under the table and over to Adora’s hand, lightly curling her fingers around it. Adora immediately squeezed back as hard as she could.
And for awhile, things were good. They held hands as they walked through the hall together, they spent more time together after school, and Adora was pretty sure her parents were aware that something had changed. She caught them exchanging knowing smiles when they thought she wasn’t looking.
They kissed for the first time under the bleachers one sunny afternoon after school.
Catra stopped coming to school after that.
She didn’t have a cellphone, so Adora couldn’t text her to ask if she was okay, and Adora didn’t even know where she lived. How had she known Catra for seven years without ever even finding out her address?
“I’m sure she’s okay, Adora,” Marlena assured her daughter, even if she wasn’t really sure about that at all. She’d long ago stopped giving Catra Adora’s old jackets, instead buying her a new one every time she needed it. She’d also gotten Catra’s measurements so Grandma could make her hats and gloves that actually fit right.
It had been four days since Adora had last seen Catra. She was lying in bed Friday night, too anxious to sleep, when she heard a light tap on her window, and a soft, familiar voice.
“Adora?”
Adora immediately sprang out of bed to open her window, catching Catra as she tumbled in. “Are you okay?” Adora asked, hugging Catra tight. Catra shook her head and clung to her. Adora held her, kissing her temple until she was ready to pull away.
She gasped.
Catra’s face was painted in bruises, dark bags under her eyes. “What happened?” Adora demanded. “Did your mother do this? I’ll kill her.”
“No,” Catra said quickly, grabbing Adora again. “Don’t.”
“Why not? Why did she even…?”
Catra dropped her gaze to the floor. “She saw us kissing.”
Adora’s mouth fell open, eyes wide. “What? How?”
“She teaches on the high school side. Her classroom faces the field and she…”
Catra shuddered, curling in on herself a little. Adora immediately pulled her back into a hug.
“Let me get my parents. Please. They’ll help.”
“No.” Catra shook her head. “Don’t. They can’t help.”
“Yes they can—”
“Adora.” Catra cut her off quietly. “She’s sending me away.”
“What?”
Catra dragged Adora over to her bed so they could sit, and she curled into Adora’s side. “She took me out of school here and she’s sending me to an all girls catholic school or something. Which is stupid if she’s worried about me being gay, but apparently the teachers are all nuns.”
Adora held Catra a little closer. “She can’t do that.”
“We’re leaving tomorrow,” Catra said. Adora stiffened. “I just wanted to say goodbye to you.”
“My parents can stop her,” Adora insisted. “They love you. They won’t let her do this.”
Catra didn’t look as sure. “In the morning, okay? I just want to sleep now.”
Adora didn’t like the idea of waiting, but she nodded and they laid back in Adora’s bed. Catra curled up on Adora’s chest, arms wrapped around her waist, and Adora played with her hair until they fell asleep.
She was gone when Adora woke up in the morning.
Adora was nearly in tears as she told her parents what had happened the night before. Randor somehow found Catra’s address and went straight over. He returned only a few minutes later, saying no one had answered the door and there were no cars in the driveway.
On Monday, Adora dared to venture over to the high school side, asking around about Mrs. Weaver until someone finally pointed her in the direction of the woman’s classroom. Adora walked straight into the room and met Catra’s mother for the first time.
“What did you do to Catra?”
Mrs. Weaver looked up from whatever she was working on, raising an eyebrow. “Can I help you?”
“You can answer the question.”
“I’m not sure how it’s any of your business. You don’t even belong on the high school side of campus. What are you doing here?”
“I want to know where Catra is, and I’m not leaving until you tell me.”
The woman sighed, picking up the phone on her desk and calling down to the office. “There’s an eighth grader in my classroom harassing me. Yes, room two-oh-three. Thank you.”
Adora stood there with her arms crossed, refusing to move even when the principal came in to try and make her leave.
“I’m not leaving until she tells me where Catra is.”
“As you’re well aware,” Mrs. Weaver said to the principal, “I’ve transferred my daughter to a different school. It’s none of this girl’s business where she is.”
“Please come along Ms…”
“Gray. And no.”
Marlena was finally called in to retrieve Adora. Which she did, but not without looking Mrs. Weaver right in the eye and saying, “You should be ashamed. And you certainly have no right to call yourself a mother.”
Adora managed to get to Marlena’s car before she started crying.
Adora Gray was eighteen when she finally started learning to live again.
The rest of high school had been terrible. She’d made other friends, but no one could ever replace Catra. And Mrs. Weaver, the bitch she was, had never told her where Catra was.
Going to Bright Moon University felt like a new start. Away from the shadows that hung over her. Away from the sympathetic looks she got for a long time because everyone in her class knew how close she and Catra had been. Away from her parents who seemed to always be watching her, waiting for her to break.
College was a place where she could be a different person. That was a relief.
She met Glimmer and Bow in a history class, and quickly befriended them. They didn’t know her tragic story, and she didn’t tell them.
“This final is going to kill me,” Glimmer groaned. “Do you guys want to come over and study?”
“We’re definitely not going to get any studying down at your dorm,” Bow teased.
“Sure we will! Please?”
Bow raised an eyebrow at Adora, who shrugged and nodded. “All right, fine. As long as your roommate is okay with it.”
“She hasn’t surfaced from her textbooks since last weekend. She won’t even notice.”
They went back to Glimmer’s after dinner. “My roommate is kind of snippy sometimes,” Glimmer warned Adora as they walked down the hall. “She’s nice enough when she wants to be, but that’s really only with people she likes.”
“Which is mostly Glimmer and sometimes me,” Bow added.
“I’ll make sure she behaves though, don’t worry.”
Glimmer opened the door and led them into her room. “Hey, I’m—”
Adora felt like the floor had gone out from under her. Because she knew the person sitting at the desk. Knew that angular face, the wild hair (even if it was short now), knew those blue and yellow eyes.
“Catra?”
Her head snapped up, eyes wide. Glimmer and Bow looked between them, waiting for someone to explain, but the silence stretched out between.
Finally, Catra spoke in a small voice. “Adora?”
She stood up slowly. Adora bolted across the room and grabbed Catra in a hug so tight that she lifted her off the floor. Catra was very still in her arms for a moment before she started clinging for dear life.
Glimmer finally broke the silence. “So you uh… you two know each other?”
Catra Weaver was six years old when she met the love of her life.
She didn’t realize it was love until many, many years, after she ran away from the school her mother had sent her to in order to “fix” her, when she was safely in a foster home with good parents and a mostly tolerable foster sister, when she was finally able to unravel the years and years of abuse she had suffered at the hands of her mother and that school. Only when she was able to look back at her life and remember the one good thing she’d ever had did she realize how much she had loved Adora Gray.
And by then it was far too late.
And then it wasn’t.
They didn’t fall right back into their old habits, because they were such different people now, but being with Adora was still easier than breathing.
Or, as Glimmer said, “If I’d known being with Adora would make you so happy, I would have introduced you guys at the beginning of the year.”
Adora brought Catra home for winter break, because she insisted her parents would want to see her. Catra wasn’t sure about that. She had fond memories of Marlena and Randor, and they had treated her well. But she had been a stupid kid. Did they even remember her?
“They’ll be thrilled to see you,” Adora insisted as they pulled into the driveway.
“What did they say when you asked about me visiting?”
Adora didn’t answer. Catra narrowed her eyes. “You told them, right?” Nothing. “Adora!”
“It’ll be a great surprise! Come on!”
“Adora!”
Catra threw herself out of the car after Adora, trying to stop her before she opened the front door. But it was too late.
“Mom! Dad! I have a surprise!”
“Adora,” Catra hissed, standing in the open door.
Marlena and Randor came into the living room, then froze when they saw who was with their daughter. Catra started to step back, suddenly terrified of being rejected. She wouldn’t be able to stand it if they didn’t want her.
“Oh Catra.”
Marlena crossed the room and pulled Catra into a hug. She cried as she held the younger woman, brushing her fingers through Catra’s shortened hair. Randor came over and rested a hand on Catra’s back.
There would be plenty of time to catch up. For Catra to learn that Razz had made her a new hat and mittens every year without fail (this year included). To learn that Marlena and Randor had tried to look for her, and had even called the police on her mother.
But that was all for later. For now Catra could just enjoy being home.