Chapter Text
- 5:30pm - Tuesday evening.
Today was terrible. Nothing felt right for Celestino. His hands were too sweaty under his gloves and his hair was glued to his forehead in an uncomfortable manner, leaving him unable to concentrate and therefore crashing in stupid ways many, many times during practice.
He fell off his bike so often Valentino called him over and told him he needed to stop for the day or he would risk a serious injury from all the bruises he's collecting. So here he is, in the kitchen freshly showered, listening to all his friends practicing while he's left on his own with his thoughts. Which is never a good idea with Cele.
It's not that he's depressed or anything, but if given the opportunity to not think ever again he would take it no questions asked. He sighs opening the fridge looking for the grapes he hid from Bez earlier.
Ah. Bez. Wonderful Bez.
He looks out the window and catches a glimpse of said rider going all in against Pecco in a corner. He wonders if the other will want to go out tonight. With him that is. He wonders if Bez -specific- will want to go out with him -also specific- tonight. Maybe they'll even dance together and with the alcohol in their system, nobody will notice curious hands finding a place to rest on each others waist or maybe even lowe-
"You feeling better Celin?"
He jumps at the voice and slams the refrigerator door, audibly causing something to break inside. Wincing and staring back and forth between the sudden intruder and the fridge. Valentino just laughs.
"Ah, i'll take it as a no then. Did something happen at home?"
Taking a deep breath in before answering, Cele stares at the floor and mumbles, "No no no, everything is just fine at home..it's just.."
Cutting himself off and biting his lower lip, afraid of speaking up and being so openly vulnerable in front of a man who has become a father figure to him.
Valentino steps around the counter and closer to Celin, frown now evident on his face.
"It's ok bambino, you can tell me, si?"
"Stop calling me that, i'm not twelve anymore Vale.." He looks up, trying to brighten the mood and steer the conversation away.
Valentino looks older these days. More spent. Cele briefly wonders if he's the one causing it, maybe he's not doing well enough these days and doesn't deserve his place in the academy anymore. That thought is instantly broken by a hand on his arm, squeezing slightly in worry, bringing him back to the present.
"You are ok Cele, right? Do i need to have a talk with one of the boys? Did you guys have a fight? Is that why you are scared to tell me?" Somehow, Valentino's frown deepens.
Celestino can feel his eyes starting to sting, he hasn't even opened his mouth yet but the idea of being emotional with his dad for the first time leaves him a mix of embarrassment, yearning and fear. He's not sure he will be able to speak a single word before the tears start falling. He tries anyway.
"Si, i am ok. I will be anyways, i think i just need to clear my head a bit and racing isn't helping today." Miracles do exist. He puts on the best smile he can manage which is no more than a sad curl of his lips before it falls once more.
Valentino sighs, let's go off his arm only to cross his own over his chest. "Racing isn't helping?" He looks to the side, thinking.
"Well..It is only Tuesday. I suppose, one of the boys would be happy to go with you to that club you really like eh? Would that help, maybe?" He looks back into Cele's eyes. Still worried but a slight sparkle in them shows he's proud of his idea.
Nodding, this time not trusting the gods to bless him with yet another miracle, he doesn't speak further. Cele breaths, he can talk with Vale about his feelings later right now he needs to find an outfit.
Valentino smiles at him and curtly nods. "I will ask Maro." Is the last thing he says before stepping away and out of the kitchen.
Slowly walking to his room Celestino stars to wonder if he's washed the shirt Bez gifted him last christmas. The other rider might not be coming with them but if anything, he'll watch him leave. He has to make an impression on Marco one way or another.
Taking his shirt off and looking in his closet, Cele forgets all about the grapes and starts looking for the perfect going out but wanting to impress your maybe-gay-but-definitely-acts-straight-so-you-don't-really-know bestfriend outfit.
- 11:08pm - Tuesday Night.
Finally dressed and ready to go, they leave the ranch. The three of them, Pecco, Maro and Cele, all packed into the back of a private taxi. Valentino was adamant about wanting them to have a good time and being able to drink without thinking about having to drive themselves home. He even offered to drive them himself.
Realistically, Celestino knows Valentino told Pecco and Luca he wasn't feeling well. The way both riders try to keep a conversation going about Cele's interests despite never really caring much about them before. It's cute, sweet, brotherly even. Overly so on Pecco's part.
"Tell me more about it Cele, i want to understand"
Turning to his left where Pecco sits, looking at him expectantly, Cele sighs before he answers.
"You don't have to do this Franci. I'm fine really, i don't know what Vale told you but i am fine. It's a lot more hurtful to repeat things over and over again about something you don't even care about, than anything else going on in my life right now. Trust me." Ok..Maybe his brain forgot to put the word filter back after cleaning it because what was that?
All three boys sit in silence, eyes wide open, all shocked at the younger's sudden and very unusual outburst. Celestino goes to apologise but Pecco beats him to it, "Ok i'm sorry. You usually talk a lot when you are upset. I thought it might help you feel better but..If you say that you are fine then.." Turning his head to look out the window, Pecco's shoulders a lot more tense than when they entered the car.
Great. Now he feels even worse. He really didn't mean to lash out at his brother friend, Pecco was just trying to help and he knows that. He's just been on edge lately and the fact that he put this entire outfit on just for Bez to see it but the rider was showering before they left so he didn't get to upset him even further. It's not his fault.
"Alright guys, we're almost at the club. Lets just all drink and forget about this shit day we're having, ok? Well..You guys do that. I've had a great day today." Luca smiles and blushes slightly.
Celin raises an eyebrow, suddenly very interested in talking to Luca.
"Oh yeah? Why's that, special lady or something?" He asks with a smirk. It's performative, both boys can tell Cele is trying his best to act normal. Bless them for not calling him out on it.
Shaking his head Luca answers,"No. No special lady, hasn't been a lady for a long time." Looking at his lap, fidgeting nervously with his hands with a slight smile on his lips.
Celestino's eyes go wide -again-.
"Holy fuck! Are you gay!?" He exclaims loudly.
Abruptly, the car comes to a stop, "We're here." Pecco says as he exist. Everything going way too fast all of a sudden, Cele is pulled out of the car while Luca pays the rider and joins the other two. Quickly making their way to the front of the queue, the security guard letting them inside immediately. Pecco never letting go of his arm, practically pulling him everywhere, it's a bit disorienting for Celestino.
They find a seat at their usual table and Luca finally looks at him again, hands still fidgeting from where he's hiding them under the table.
"Not quite..I don't really have a label on it. I just..I like whoever i like, doesn't matter to me what's in their pants anyways."
Cele breaks out into the biggest smile he's worn all week, heck, all month even. He tries to collect his excitement before speaking.
"So you're queer but you don't wanna put a label on it basically?"
From his seat in between them, Pecco frowns. "Queer? Isn't that like an insult? Also is it not just...you're either gay or you're not?"
Gapping at his brother Cele wonders how one so wise can be so clueless sometimes. Whoever said respect your elders they know better clearly has never met Francesco Bagnaia.
"No, there's a lot of different labels one can feel associated with. You're not either gay or straight. It's a lot more broad than that, i'll explain to you some other day. Anyways, yeah. I'm definitely not straight, i just don't have a label. That's right Celin."
Nodding along, "Right, right. I get it. Honestly, labels can be so annoying and frustrating. I'm glad i never got to fuss over that too much. I've sort of always known i'm gay so..It was never an issue for me but yeah. I get it." Cele shrugs.
Looking over his shoulder at the bar trying to decide if he wants to start easy and just get a cocktail or if he wants to get absolutely wasted immediately. He doesn't notice the silence. He doesn't notice the wide eyes and open mouths. He doesn't notice the two people sitting next to him looking at each other panicked.
"I'm gonna go get a drink. What do you guys want?" He asks. No response. He turns around and finallt notices the show that was happening behind him.
"Umm..Guys? Is something wrong?" Suddenly feeling incredibly small, Cele panics. The lack of answer not helping him calm down whatsoever.
"Have i said something? Is this about the car? I'm sorry i took it out on you Pecco, it wasn't fair of me..Guys?" Eyes darting between Pecco and Luca, Celestino tries to decipher what their expression could possibly mean.
It's Luca who breaks the silence first. "You're gay?" It's almost inaudible over the loud music.
Shrinking in his seat, his palms feeling sweaty and his breath becoming uneven. Fuck. There goes his word filter again.
"Um. Yes..Sorry." It's his turn to look down at his lap now.
"Sorry? What ever the fuck are you apologising for? Fuck me man, we're sorry. We never noticed anything before..You said you've always known?" He can only nod in answer to Pecco's question.
"Jesus fuck Celin. I'm sorry i sent you that girl's instagram last year and made fun of you for actually following her..I thought you were for sure straight man." Pecco brings a hand to cover his mouth, somehow feeling guilty about this.
"Oh. Ok damn, it's ok don't worry. I thought you guys were about to insult me for being gay or something." Cele jokes.
"Fuck no. That's fucked up, i just told you i'm not straight either anyways. What sort of dickhead would come out and then immediately insult another person for coming out?" Luca exclaims.
Celestino holds himself back from saying it was technically accidental. He only ever told one person before when he was still a young teenager discovering himself. Valentino also knows but his mentor had figured it out by catching Cele close to blackout drunk, making out with a schoolmate in front of the ranch. Not his proudest moment if he's honest.
It's Pecco who ends up getting them all drinks. He slides a cocktail in front of Cele and fuck. This is gonna be a long night.
- 2am - Wednesday Morning.
By now Cele has migrated to the bar where he orders shot after shot, dedicated to making sure he doesn't remember the day he's just had.
Luca slams into him, drunken flush on his cheeks. He had obviously been dancing. "Celliiinnnn!! I just saw my boyfriend is here, can you believe it?! My! Boyfriend!" The older slurs.
"That's great Luca. Really great." He answers unemotionally as he downs yet another shot.
Luca pulls his arm forcing him out of his seat, "Come on Cele! Stop pouting, you have to meet new people sometimes! Well i guess not new people, 'cuz you know him." As he speaks he drags them through the club to one of the darker corners of it.
Whatever you could have told Celin, could not have prepared him for who he now stands in front of.
"Marquez ?" He exclaims.
Alex turns and smiles brightly as he sees Luca, he raises a hand as to say hi. Luca breaks into the biggest smile and lets go off Cele to grab onto his -apparently- boyfriend.
"Caro mio, look who i brought!" Maro says as he points to Celestino, almost taking one of his eyes out in the process.
"Ciao Celestino! I'm happy we finally meet, or i should say meet properly!" Alex offers a gentle smile.
Celin is way too drunk for this right now. Not only did he just find out Luca is not straight, he is also dating a Marquez. Alex Marquez to be exact. A sudden wave of nostalgia hitting Cele square in the face he almost has to take a step back because of it.
Alex looks so much like his brother. They share the same features. Cele loves those features, especially the eyes. They were always so expressive. Those bright eyes always staring at Valentino with nothing but love and adoration, always looking down at him with care, adoration and sometimes worry.
Celin missed those eyes. Fuck Celin missed Marc. The tears from his earlier encounter with Vale make their way back to his eyes but this time he's too intoxicated to keep them from falling.
Alex's eyes widen and he turns his body to completely face the younger, "Are you okay?"
Shaking his head, unable to lie any more than he already has. "No. No i miss my dad and i miss being able to talk with him all the time without my other dad acting like he's the devil incarnate and it's been so stressful these past few years and fuck, i can't believe i'm in love with my bestfriend who is straight i mean, how stupid is that? And i just really miss my dad i miss him, i miss Marc he was always there for me and now he's not and it hurts." Fully breaking down into ugly sobs Celin closes his eyes and covers his face with his hands.
He doesn't remember how it all happened but he was taken outside and given some water while someone gently pet his hair, unmistakably Luca . Time both going incredibly fast and incredibly slow, he is definitely going to pass out before getting home. He takes a seat in an unfamiliar car and keeps crying and crying and crying.
Today was a long day. He deserves some sleep and maybe he'll eat some grapes in the morning to feel better. He forgets the existence of hungovers in his state.