Archive of Our Own ^beta

..::TONY::..

             Oh, the differences a handful of measly hours could make.

                  Tony was still pretty confident in his approach; as he had been when Barnes had aimed him at Loki's Illinios ..parts barn?

                           Junk Yard?

                               Oddly placed hoarding space?

        Giving the huge open-cut cavern under and alongside the lake another long look on their way out --Barnes was nudging him through the door into the basement up those winding stairs as gently as he could, really he was-- Stark realized he hadn't asked Loki what the place actually was: besides a definite long-time on the down-low crash pad.

    Or, asked the other James when he'd been here: or more precisely.. " Okay..so curious; what exactly was the sequence of you getting to know about this place.. and somehow end up on Asgard in Aphrodite's care without anybody noticing til he was gone..? "

         It did help distract him from the fact that, dinner had down below and now getting well and into crickets in the night territory: Loki still hadn't given him a clear answer. Or any kind of answer. In fact he'd gone out of his way to point out he wasn't giving one: yet. And that... well it shouldn't have surprised or affected his determination much; but it had. The annoying pangs of jealousy when Barnes took a moment here and there to soften Tony's impatient overbearing bits in the process of trying to get one didn't help either.

    " Oh.. " didn't need to nudge him from behind any more, now that the treasure trove of crazy variations of technology down there was out of his sight behind whatever illusions Loki ran on the tiny basement floor to the just as small lake house. " He took me straight here after the Silo, in Siberia. Though.. only after we spent half the flight here over the Pacific in a mostly unsuccessful attempt to assess the state of my Hydra-induced crazy. Not that it was a long one, comparatively.. " 

     Though, Stark could admit; the more he felt it? The more clearly he was able to identify where it was coming from, and why it weighed in on his smaller concerns that the Trickster would finally fold instead of throwing in his chips. " What you mean by comparatively? " That said, trying to figure it out meant Tony could make a better attempt at getting a handle on or working with it.

           " His Knives move a lot faster than anything else I've been in, or seen. It only took a few hours to get here. " the small sigh as they came up the rest of the stairs and headed straight back towards the kitchen. " Sometimes I think he probably should have slowed down just to give me more time to process, but.. when I asked him later; well.. he was right in that the only differences would have been I might have tried prying the ramp open mid-flight and jumping at the time instead of only trying to bolt early the morning after? "

      " Can I ask how he hooked you? " was a genuine question for a lot of reasons. the most obvious being " I mean yes he yanked you out but.. "

             " I didn't know him. Knew of him, and once I thought about it for more than a few minutes; the cold feet started to settle in mostly as a result of that. He was aware and prepared for that a bit .. even though nabbing me was a rare, on the fly decision. "

       This made Tony squint at him after putting his dishes in the sink: letting Barnes take over the washing business as he'd offered before they'd started up. Which, didn't need reminding. He was already tightening that low ponytail and then snagging a dishrag with one hand while the metal one plugged up the two-basin kitchen bit. Like he'd done it during his last visit. too.

   Which had Stark crossing his arms beside him as he listened, backed up against the counter beside him; realizing he'd stuck their targeted mean and green with both the cooking and the clean up during his watchful stay at the tower. " I was too wore out to keep up the adrenaline to fight or argue though, never mind talk more about it than he already had.. and I do mean he did. Not big on talking these days, especially in an uncertain situation. Never asked direct, but pretty sure he picked up on that. Kept that first night real busy though. Put some food in me, made sure I had clean clothes and knew where the utilities were; a shower.. and the basic rules, before I was suddenly on the other side of the guest room door. "

       " Huh. " Did sound like Loki. He'd sort of done something similar with Tony, when he'd appeared in his Penthouse. " Not speed-talking .. just natural flow didn't stop until you were already there? " was something Barnes understood and immediately nodded to, with a slight smirk. " Yeah that's how he slid me into our intermission, too. Knew I didn't want him slipping away and he used it to.. " Man, had he really not sorted this out other than intellectually prior; other than to take it out as ammunition at the table yesterday? " ..take care, of me. " It was a little concerning? But no; Tony realized he actually had not.

   And Barnes, pausing otherwise looking at him like that while he checked the water temp from the tap with his flesh and blood hand? Understood that well enough to simply drawl through a slight chuckle " ...yeeeaaah. Exactly, that. "

      Watching him a little longer while he went about getting the dish soap and first dishes in there; Tony caught himself comparing their relationships with the alien downstairs yet again: and.. maybe that was what bothered him?

  The bit where, Barnes had it better with the fresh start.

 None of the screw-ups, like how Stark reacted to that not-quite-a-surprise kiss in the alley: or purposely setting what he'd seen to get one in the first place aside, as his own personal flavor of screw up added to it. " You fight him at all? " ended up asked in the general direction of his own toes while Barnes was distracted with scraping into the nearby trash bin as a part of his dish washing process.

   His pride was glad Buck hadn't picked up on the 'kicking myself and curious' expression because of it, when " Physically? Not past the first couple of swings? He's quick, strong, and slippery. Add in a few minutes later I got to see just how strong he actually was, when he knocked you both sideways out there: and he hadn't really used it more than to counter me? Nope. " made Tony push out a breath, and readjust his hold on his arms.

       That motion, did catch his attention. It was brief, but Barnes was observant and either respectful or scared enough of wrecking the odd but comfortable exchange not to call it out too hard. " And, knowing of him rather than knowing the man at the time? I kinda had an idea how going at it alone woulda ended. " was also a fair point.

     " You considered it, though? " 

  " Briefly. " Made Tony look at him again; curious.. and more so when a wry dimpled smirk showed itself on his side of the sink. " And with a lot of guilt behind it when I did consider it. Ultimately I wasn't comfortable thanking him for yanking me out of that situation by throwing down hands, either. "

        Big, slow nod, because put in his position, to Tony; that made sense. " And so you decided to try and make a break for it; rather than try to punch your way out. "

    " My brain caught up to the present and yeah. He saved that whole situation. Not just pulling me out of your range but; well.. you saw the news feeds and public information drops. Anyone who didn't know it was a former agent of Sokovia and JSOC who killed those people and then sloppily framed me for it so they could hunt me down: did by day two, after.. maybe night one after the Silo. " Tony, had known about the drops as soon as he was awake.

     Prying at what had happened through the others and especially Friday, had left him absolutely flabbergasted. Those drops, in a way; and the time he'd had to take to digest that and what had happened, had set him up to take that bet. Well, that and the fact that Loki hadn't been wrong about anything he'd said to get him to agree to it or throw out the next nurse in record time to keep him in sight.

  Zemo had not been lying when he had said he had been pulling strings to try and get them at each other's throats for a year. Spencer, Ross, even the way things in Nigeria had been twisted around and aimed at Wanda through controlled information drops to and by the media ignoring the local government's involvement in making and failing to properly protect a biological weapon in the middle of a highly populated market street? Tony still sort of wondered now, how many of them genuinely recognized they'd been played: Hydra cell parts or not, knowingly, or not.

      " I'm getting from that silence, that you maybe took that shock about as cleanly as I did at the time? " snapped Tony out of rehashing it all the same though.

            " Maybe worse given I was right there, backing up the stupid and lack of investigation that led to hunting you down in Romania and afterwards; yes. "

    " Well.. to be fair; " had him looking over to Barnes like he was about to say something crazy.. because what? This guy was going to argue -for- hunting him like a dog, with literal kill squads and shoot on sight orders; as an okay thing to do with no actual confirmation on whether the evidence had been fake or not? Which.. it had been: faked, by Zemo. Who killed hundreds. Including T'Challa's father, and many more attending the assembly. " Regardless of all the out of bounds ..shit, it came from? Trying to nail me down once found; wasn't an unsound idea at the time. "

          " Oh? " was dry and crisp and absolutely full of disbelief and self blame that Tony had since decided he had earned. Because yes, he had been right there in the middle of it; center of the front row: and still not seen the stupid to that when it had mattered most. To the point that yes; he was still more than a little angry at himself for it, and the fact that Loki had not only noticed what he hadn't; but documented and pointed out all the ways they had fucked it all up between video from the actual security cameras, their builds, and the travel time that would have been required not matching... not just to those immediately involved: but literally to the entire world.

         To the point that yes, weeks later; the world was still dealing with the backlash of their own parts and lack thereof where it should have been, in it.

   And Tony knew his facial expression matched the tone that knowing that now, absolutely deserved to have in it when Barnes looked at him again between dishes. His face didn't change much; because looking at him today, after yesterday and last week, and the week before especially given his own part in it? Stark knew that look belonged where it was on his own face, now.

        Didn't seem to throw Barnes as much as Tony thought it should, though. " They screwed me up pretty good; and I wasn't clear of the soldier yet... which all else aside: Zemo did prove when he got to me. " was a point; if one Tony didn't think Barnes was approaching correctly.

     Because " Uh-huh. And, how many times did that happen; between Washington and Germany? Before, we let him concentrate the whole fuckin' planet on catching you because we couldn't be bothered to-- " full stop.

 And, while it was enough to make Barnes crinkle his brow; it wasn't enough to get the underlying comparison out of his head, or keep him from frowning. Because Loki had made the comparison, but it hadn't stuck until just then. He had made it himself without really thinking about it, in a way. And finally catching the similarities properly now, pissed Tony off more. " Jesus I am a real dumbass sometimes, for being so goddamned smart. "

        " ..what? " yeah he had confused Barnes for a moment.

  " No wonder hes' so slow about giving me a solid answer. " was more to the entry to the hallway leading back towards the basement and bedrooms on either side than to Barnes; mouth pursed in irritation after. " Same goddamn story; different blue eyed brunette. " seemed like it knocked it home for Barnes though.

          Enough for him to just stare for a couple counts and then go back to his very interesting dishes in Tony's peripherals. Which, was grating in it's own way. Mostly, for the fact that: he didn't say it right away? But he knew.

     " That isn't why he hadn't answered. " pulled Stark out of his angry self-depreciating introspection however. " He hasn't seen or heard, what I did at that table yesterday; to know you're being earnest and not taking advantage of my like of and gratitude towards him for sure. " almost knocked him sideways for how bluntly that comment touched some of what he hadn't wanted to think. Barnes didn't stop there though; and his even tones didn't change much. " You know some of what he's been through; how some of his most valuable and durable trusts've been tainted if not downright crushed by the ones he's given it to. Most of it for centuries longer than any of the rest of us've been alive, and behind his back for that length to boot. "

      That... still pissed him off, right along with having been lied to about all of it by Thor. Ground his teeth, a bit; in the jaw clench. " Whats' worse, instead of trying to genuinely fix or understand how badly they fucked up, never mind the consequences resulting from that? They just kept up with more and worse of the same, after he got himself loose from that asshole in twenty twelve. And their attempts to include you in that through Thor? Seem to have been pretty effective until recently; and both potentially lethal as well as damning, for him in particular. "

         " Yeah. I remember the death sentence mention. " was not a high point to recall frothing at the mouth about at the table either. " I retain; if I'd known-- "

                 " And there's that. Last words as to your position on him, we both heard you say at the silo? Was that you hated him. " was a reminder that kicked him in the gut and tugged his eyes back to the floor. Barnes was facing him now, wiping his hands while the few dishes air-dried. " He wants to trust you, I can tell. " did pull some of his innards back into place. " And he cares. " helped get the majority of the rest back in there too, " He wouldn't have bailed on me the minute he got those reading relays off your nanites as to how bad you were doing otherwise. " was also news.

   News Tony needed. And from the tone of where this was going and the stance Barnes was taking at the sink next to him? Barnes knew it too.

        " But, and I've gotta ask given how he bailed out of the tower at the end of it was a big red flag as to exactly how unconfirmed for him that trust is between you two right now: " did finally grab his eyes up again to try and at least glean this bit from his face too, though Tony was not not sure whether he'd like the question or not. " ..when are you going to pick up all that determination I saw and heard, and loved at that table; and tell him he can. When are you gonna ask him, outright." Finger up, like he'd known Stark would try to interrupt. " Not about the other guy. About whatever is and has been going on between you two that's holding you both up. Because.. it is getting in the way, not being there now that we're here. "

           " I did! I a-- "

                    " No! You did what... " a breath out, and Tony realized that was what was different. His confidence. Rubbing his hands --metal and otherwise-- briefly down a portion of his thighs before they were back at his hips, head down a little as he pulled up the need to look him in his eyes and finally just say it. " You've been doing what I do with you; since Germany, and Siberia when I found out you were Howard's son the same time you found out they used me to kill him. " absolutely froze Stark up.

     Instant internal denial as that idea shocked it's way through his brain. But... " Same thing he does, or tries to do when his relationships to Asgard prior to twenty thirteen come up unless asked direct and often even when it is. Your relationship affected by it, included. You've been tip-toeing, summarizing; playing it like he should be able to just know where you're at and where you're coming from to trust that in entirety.. and you know, especially after yesterday covering the reasons why: you know that's the hardest setting you could possibly put this question in while you're asking it! "

         He wanted to argue, he did. But " He wasn't at that table to hear you, or the fight you put in it to end up here Tony: and you haven't told him more than a door to door salesman might to make a quicker sale. And with all that; with that history, which includes you...! He needs to know, not guess or assume. " was something he couldn't deny. " He gonna and absolutely should question it without that, especially now and in this situation as it is: he's gonna wonder, whether he should really let us in rather than keeping us at .. half a damn galaxy's worth of length until he's sure. " wasn't either.

    But he wanted to.

        " I need a shower. " because whatever it was that made approaching the people you'd harmed the most with your mistakes so hard; was also pushing him off the lean on the counter. Fast, by comparison to the lazy way they'd come up here.

       " Stark. " as the start of Barnes definitely wanting to keep on; got hopped on with a fast " Let me rephrase that. " that bought him a few more steps in that direction, and a towel out of the tiny closet across from it as the first door on the left.

                    " I need time, to think; and get my head on straight. " was the closest to 'you're right' Barnes was going to get at that particular moment.

                  Buck seemed to pick up on that, too. And didn't call it out or reinforce like he could've.

                         It was still weird, when Tony closed the bathroom door.

          How much Tony admired, loved, and wanted to punch the guy for all the bravery it took to say all that so cleanly to him, in particular.

                           As well as, recognizing that Stark had needed to hear it.

                                Whether or not he had wanted to, or; to face those facts... never mind that it was James Bucky Barnes, who had been the one to say it.

--==11:12 PM==--

                                                Tony hadn't been ready by the time he was out of the shower.

                            Or, when Loki came up again himself to clean up; and inform them that if they actually were staying: they would be sharing the master bedroom while the owner took the guest room.

           And, well: after trying out the couch, Stark begrudgingly agreed that sharing the huge bed that barely fit in the main bedroom was definitely the better option of the two: whether he was entirely comfortable with it or not. he was a big boy, after all. Or so he kept having to tell other people.

  Because nope, he did not think he could do another few hours with Barnes half strapped and half hugging him from behind all the way back to New York, just to sleep and try to avoid the guys to do that a third time, or ride alone with him in a quinjet.

     Incidentally, Stark found himself looking at the bed listening to the undertones of Barnes and Lo chatting in the hallway on the way to the metal armed man's return in pretty much the same way he imagined Barnes had looked at the guest room bed on his own first night in Loki's unassuming Illinois starter home after having been told about it. Dazed, and wondering how he'd ended up here and in this situation while he did; even after having lived it. Absolutely shell shocked for the few seconds it took him to half trudge to it and make his way for the wall-side inner part of the mattress.

        Still tumbling around in his own head when he was shuffled under the covers, staring at the pearly designs on the ivory wall under the grey and navy dressed window just over his ear in front of him. Not curled up externally, but oh man feeling kinda like it internally while Barnes slipped in and tried miserably at his six foot two hundred and some very decent change of still damp muscle and metal not to disturb him while he got his getting to bed routine done well away from any touch other than the slight sink and rise of the shared spring mattress.

           He left the little light on the stand behind the door on; and kept quiet.

             And there was that weird again; more so for the fact that Tony was starting to get angry at the part of him that felt that way regardless of everything he'd seen, said and done in the past two days in particular; and held off saying a word: even in this awkward bit, which of course, only made laying there that much more charged a silence.

                 It was so quiet; Tony heard the breath in; and had too much of a feel for what Barnes was thinking to say to let it get out from behind his kicked puppy scruffy face. " You don't get to apologize for what you said. " started out almost drilled into the pretty wallpaper, before he turned to his back in order to save it from catching on fire or something. " And you can stop trying not to choke on the breath I stopped you from using to do it, too: 'Cause what I mean by that, is you don't have to, and I don't want you to. Not that I won't hear it. "

      Why was the ceiling pretty too god damn it.

There were pearly sparkles in frickin' swirly plaster up there.

         The sigh was loudly mental too, when it came out his mouth.

                      " This is... both our fault; draggin' you into this in our own ways. Especially without fixing the big problem.. and maybe not wanting to for how comfortable we've gotten in it. The game. "

             " Game..? "

                  Inward sigh. And yes that is a thing. Or at least Tony had so discovered; as of his teens anyway. " Him and me .. I screwed us up worse than we already were headed for, when I had a chance to fix it instead. " still couldn't look at him. Not yet anyway. " Happened right after New York. As in, like; hours after. Barely a day. " he was pacing himself, purposely. " I said something stupid close to the truth, he did something in response.. and I ... blew up, it surprised me so much. We'd already been messing with each other; testing the boundaries. He shoulda hated me for how I reacted and what I said, especially when I said it. "

   " But he didn't. " got tacked onto real fast by Tony, after Barnes had said it, with " I didn't know that for sure and I definitely didn't believe it. Bruce came along at just the wrong sort of perfect timing.. and he was toted off to Asgard less than an hour later. "

     Breath out, again. Less sigh and more realizing who he was telling this to.

                   And also that; the real weird was in the fact that " You and me.. ..this, isn't weird because of my dad. I think about it, yeah. But I was never a complete idiot. It's taken me the last couple days and especially what you said to realize the weird comes from the fact my relationship with you, is his second coming for me; minus getting a kiss a day afterwards and freaking out badly enough to turn the relationship into a mockery of the stage play he needed to survive all that crap I shut off having seen afterwards. More so, when I was trying really hard not to believe I'd lost any tiny chance to fix any part of it after being told he was dead for three years. "

       " Tony, you don't have t-- " 

                                          " I do. You sat there, and backed me up at that table; even after repeating the same mistakes. Even after I targeted you with my next major interpersonal mental breakdown, in line. You deserve the understanding as much as he does; and you're in here now, after pointing it out to me when he's not.. so you get it first. No arguments. " 

              Didn't have to ask; he knew Barnes didn't know what to say to that.

   And, now that he'd gotten that particular bit of perspective out? Close to what he thought maybe he wanted to say, or ask?

        Tony needed those few, long, breathing seconds; letting what he'd finally responded with sink in so he could get the rest out properly.

               Glancing over from the ceiling, just for a moment; it was easier to breathe seeing Barnes looking up there too. " Maybe working at this backwards; is gonna be the best way: all that said. " caught his visual interest while Tony was looking at the tooled mount for the overhead ceiling light in the dim. " Work out you and me, I mean. Now a good time? "

         And okay; he could almost laugh for the freeze that put on the big guy; Barnes trying not to show his instant internal freak-out in trying to guess if this was going to be a good thing or not. Tony managed not to smile too big at least, as he shook his head at him towards looking back at the elegant interior decorating. " I'm getting a good enough read on you already, to know this is where I tell you not to act like a cat in a room full of rocking chairs when I say that kind of thing; or mention my dad. "

           Quiet answered him for now, and that was fine. " You can keep your guilt. I get that part of it; maybe better than Rogers ever will, even. Keep it.. but and especially when around me; you don't get to keep the blame others are gonna try to pair with it. " Finally seemed to make Buck breath properly again. Relax a little and listen better.

   Which, helped Tony relax in places he hadn't realized he had been tensing up, too. " My favorite physics professor, had this one saying.. mostly for the new kids transferring in; if not his one-oh-one class. The last couple weeks, it's been popping up in my head; and pretty sure I've confirmed that all this, and Loki, and you especially the last day or so; is why it keeps flashing up in here. "

         " Can I ask..? " didn't really need a nod, of course. Just the answer.

     " 'Extreme situations, actions and environments, will almost always create extreme results and reactions.' " seemed to be of interest enough to Barnes, to pull him over onto his side. Got him propping his temple up under his right arm, that curious sort of ease to his dark brows. Tony hadn't realized til then, the guy did not wear his undershirt to bed; and catching the edge of that seam between metal and flesh in his peripherals paused him for a moment. Had him briefly tipping his head away from the little gleam at the joint, pushing the mechanical questions he hadn't thought of until just that moment off to keep going.

            Or try to. " And without getting into re-hashing how perfectly ours have landed thanks to certain obvious intervention, and intervening on his behalf: " because actually asking was a little awkward, but: one thing Tony knew after that conversation in the kitchen: was that Loki wasn't the only one who needed and deserved Tony being up front rather than taking the comfortable half avoiding things train. " the extreme, has landed me in a place where I'm gonna .. scratch that: want to, ask you; if you want to lay everything but our shared rage at your former captors down...  and try to be maybe not just allies, but friends? "

          For someone who wasn't comfortable labeling things that openly most days? The wait for an answer felt ages longer than it actually was.

      One.

        Two; and dammit did he really have to think that hard about it?

           Three, why di-- " Sorry. " drug some of Tony's gut down, except, there was something off about the firm, unapologetic, but somehow gentle way he let that slide across the pillowcases that turned his head. Just in time to watch him close most of the distance between them. " I.. don't think I'm gonna be okay with that; just yet... " was in close to his nose at Barnes' height before Tony actually registered what he was doing, and where his eyes were fixed at under his nose.

             The kiss was on his lips before he could even think of anything else.

        It was a careful, fragile surprise; and a little too close to another one four years back for Tony to do anything but just ..let it happen, and try not to repeat the mistake he'd made with that first one.

   Little details clicked in. The clean he smelled, and turn and contrast of his lashes against his skin with his eyes nearly closed as they were.

        The unsure way his eyes flicked under them from cheek to cheek trying to figure out, holding his breath in a whole other way while he let Tony try to process what had just happened.

       And the nerves; the little tremble to his whisper and warmth to his breath: somehow managing a half dry bit of flavor to the joking question  " ...too extreme a reaction to deal with this soon? "

          " No. " was the first thing out of Tony's mouth and, he didn't dare leave it that simple " Just.. I.. you! Totally surprised me with.. " he really needed to finish a sentence. Barnes' brows were up and he was definitely trying not to laugh at Stark. " Since when!? "

          " Little bit by little bit, since I tried to leave the tower, I think...? " why was he tilting his head at him with a squinty look like that, though. " Then there was the table, yesterday... " was he laughing at him? " You really were something else, you know? I barely had to put in more than a few sentences. Agreeing to come with me and snag him.. especially the way we did. Without, dropping me into the ocean or something. "

               " Hey, give me a little credit! Dropping you wasn't even a rando thought until we were over the Alleghenies! The bay's comparatively right outside my door, flight wise.. sheesh. " managed to get Barnes to laugh. Which only made Tony try not to while he was shaking his head at the ceiling, the conversation... and the fact: " ...God, I seem to attract a particular type, don't I. "

                             And there was that tiny, brief brow raise and slight tilt of head Tony suspected Barnes might have picked up from Loki. " Oh? " was almost heard before he opened his smirking mouth. Though " And here I thought I was answering all the not-flirting you've been trying not to do over the last twelve hours ..? " screeched Tony's mind to a halt right then and there.

          " What..? "

    And, bashful slash unsure all over again for his tone, and that look. Like he was on the dge of maybe panicking internally? Funny, how easy that was to see when Tony had maybe a hands space times two between their faces. " I .. well I mean; " the extra breath to finish his sentence even; kind of made Tony feel a little bad " .. there was that ride over, when you had three perfectly good Quinjets attached to the building. And had me clinging to your back instead? " that shift, tightening up again. " And the way you looked at me when we landed here, plus the .. I thought you were maybe making that comment about me and Steve, because maybe you were uncomfortable asking whether there was anyone outright? " clicked more than a few things into place, though.

          And, well; thinking about it.. Barnes wasn't entirely wrong. Was that where the real lingering wierd was from? 

    " I.. may be..? " and considering the thoughst he'd had, and more? " Actually.. I probably was. You're only the second guy I've kissed that's done anything for me, either way." launched immediately into " Does Steve even know? " attempting to get through the off, gap-mouthed expression that admittance seemed to knock onto his chiseled scruffy face.

    " ...no. " breath in and " Seriously though? "

           " Seriously on what part? "

                  " Just .. I mean the way you said that, sounds like there weren't very many with the first guy..? " 

                              " Just the one, and he's in the other room; " knocked Barnes' brows up.. and the corners of his mouth too, oddly. And only briefly, before Tony explained " The kiss was the thing I reacted shittily to. " and knocked a look that he could only describe as pure and sudden understanding.

           " ..he know that was your first? " had Tony shaking his head; trying not to focus on the fact that seam between flesh and metal was much closer to his face, because Barnes hadn't retreated more than absolutely necessary after giving him that kiss. " I ..dunno, really. I didn't tell him, but .. I was busy making an ass of myself freaking out internally, and verbally letting the working traitor portion of my brain hijack my mouth both to manage that screw up, at the time. " And that Tony was .. actually really comfortable talking to him about it. Just like that.

       " That sucks. " was nice to hear an agreement and understanding to go with it, out of someone else's mouth, too. " I can see why else you're both so mad about how things turned out, now. "

               Still. That kiss..? He couldn't help but glance a little longer at that lower half of his face. They were both attractive... in different ways, physically; but. " Yeah... you're not mad, or disappointed at all..? "

                    " Nah. I messed up my first kiss with a guy too. Similar I'm betting. " was something Tony instantly wanted to ask about. "  I'm relieved.. " was a little confusing, though. " ..and glad that mystery's solved, and you didn't punch me out of the bed instead. " and then he asked " You still hung up on him like he is you..? " looking him right in the eye.

                    Because ....what? " I doubt I'm that lucky. " was a serious concern and roadblock for Tony actually; wasn't it.

                        " Dude. " caught Tony's eyes again. " He might've slid it sideways, but he told you in Siberia: I couldn't miss it even now, looking back. He popped up and nabbed me out of range, because of you. " wasn't a take Tony had been allowing himself to accept; except.. it was kind of hard to forget that exchange, while Loki had been injecting him with the nanites that definitely had saved his ass. " I spent half my time with him trying to figure out why, with what I did know of New York, and how you'd reacted to him at the Silo. Like I said in the kitchen; he cares. A lot. Enough to risk himself, and everything else he's been working on, just to put a stop to what was happening when it was clear we weren't handling it the way he expected us to. "

            Oh.

       So; that's what this was...

             Barnes thankfully got the fact Tony hadn't let that sink in or into place, without him having to say as much. But he was watching; and Tony picked up that .. the tension, and the weird? 

       Even if it was only for now: both were entirely out of the room, never mind the space between them. " Okay, but.. I mean, you just said -- "

                                                                 " Oh... sorry, for not.. I mean, I know a few more things than you: and sorta.. " sigh, the kind that had Tony squinting at him, while he visibly shored himself up to  " Okay. " followed by the explanation of " I ..absolutely do want at least friends; but that obviously isn't my aim: and I'm not gonna pretend.. if you're up for it? I want more with both of you. "

          " Huh. " was half demand and half thinking maybe Barnes was actually still a little crazy for not only saying that, but having the balls to say it that bluntly, with that much certainty.

                   But then the reason hadn't hit his ears yet. Because " I don't wanna get hurt, " was understandable as it was honest. And " and I don't want either of you to get hurt in this, or trying to compete for spots next to each other, either. " was honestly a lot more thought than Tony had put into it at the moment and for the most part. " I didn't expect this.. liking you this much is a little crazy, but that's how I feel. I like how we've been going; misunderstandings between New York and here and all. I catch myself wanting to see and know more of both of you; and if you want to and you'll let me try? I'll work with you to catch him that way too. "

             " Can I.. answer you in the morning? "

                      " I'll do you one better and say; get around to apologizing; telling him how you feel and what really happened, first. Think about me, in between. That shouldn't be left to stew any longer than it already has. "

       " I dunno if I can. " 

                " I've waited and been through a century of hell; to find anyone I felt this strongly about. " didn't have the malice Tony half expected, for what was behind it. One thing he could say; Barnes was constantly surprising him, in the most curious and enjoyable ways. " Take the time you need, however you need it Ant. " went with a little peck of a kiss near his temple, before Barnes just.. rolled onto his back; and tugged his arms up under his neck over his own pillow. " I'm with you either way; okay? "

        And, watching his face before he turned his eyes to the ceiling again, Tony knew he actually meant it. " ..okay. "

                Tony wasn't sure what to say at that point, or for that matter if he even wanted to say anything at all.

                      The space was comfortable for the time being, and in the process of examining and sorting things out in his head: it came to him that he really didn't want to mess with that almost off comfort.

                       It wasn't the kind of thinking mode that would keep him up either, he realized after a few minutes.

                             Slipping into the drowsy bit heading into actual sleep, Stark and Barnes both had already named what mattered most in coming here, together: and a few more details of where they might be going. Yeah, there were some personally pretty important details to figure out and work through?

                           But, at least two thirds of it was out there for them to sort out for themselves and together which directions on that map they wanted to, and could go... and that was a much bigger relief than Tony had realized up until then that it could be.

--==8:10 AM==--

                   Middle of his eggs (with spicy oysters; those were growing on him in the scramble mix), when a door down the short hall banged closed.

                     Barnes was more heard than seen with the near stomp of his boots across the shiny wood floor leading straight to the front door across from Tony being half yanked open and likewise smacked shut, while Tony was still wiping the little bits in his beard from the startle he'd been given by the sudden noise and harsh, definitely angry motion. There were a few seconds scanning from his plate to the lean to see him out the window yanking the little tool shed the other side of the driveway open with what looked an awful lot like what Stark was guessing were more than a few grumbled if not growled curses.

                Immediately reaching for those navy blue tray things Loki insisted they eat from when not at the table and piling his remaining breakfast onto it; because no, he wasn't going to get the earful for not finishing from either of them: and especially when Barnes was in that mood to add that milder agitation to. Grabbing the juice box from the fridge he was immediately turning just in time to nearly drop the tray for the hand that landed almost on his at the front door. Apparently, Loki had been paying more attention to where he was going than what and who might jump onto that same pursuing path.

         Not so much so that he didn't catch Tony's glass from it's dangerous resulting tip to one side, though. Navy tee, grey jeans; the furling lines of his tattoo sleeves on display again: though it was those silvery blue eyes and the rest of the pursed, half concerned expression still riding that face while Tony found the moment first meeting them and took the door knob and opened it. Loki did try to pause him there, slowing the motion with a hand over his head.

      " I take it you saw Barnes. " got a little nod as he ducked under that arm in a little swivel that left Stark still facing him. " I would like it very much if you-- "

                                                                             " Left you two to it? Whatever it is..?  " went from a small thankful nod to a tick of slight annoyance when Tony tacked on " Nope. " while he butt-checked the screen door handle and slipped out the half open door backwards. " You, rightfully called me and more out on a few things the last couple a weeks... my turn, now.~ " followed by " NUH-Uh. " when he started to close the door behind him instead. It was enough of a solid tone to pause him apparently. " Get your ass out here. A lot more'n whatever you said to get him dashing towards.. " a glance back, and Tony couldn't help but flip his brows up briefly on the way back to looking at the darker brunette, because any other time " ..angry gardening..? " would be a funny he wouldn't pass up poking at.

       And.. backing up a few more steps on the narrow squint; because yes; he totally would leave his breakfast behind and try to drag Loki out there by one of the ears half tucked into his low ponytail, if he had to.

    Loki took the visual cues after a step; shaking his head a bit, but digging his feet into the slip-ons by the door on his way out.

          Turning for the entirely too enchanting pathway that led to garden turn-off from the dock path; Stark confirmed in a single look that Barnes had probably heard every word of that brief exchange; and was letting some of the tension turn into the soil around the first weed he twisted out of the lakeside dirt along the path to the manicured beech copse. Loki was following, if at a far less eager pace. Giving the lake shimmering between the trees to his right a look while Barnes twist-and-yanked another wild dandelion out from between the violets and stunning array of martagon lilies that had decided to bloom this morning.

        For a few distracted seconds taking things in; all the sound and sight there was; was fitted dark jeans, white ribbed undershirt over hard shining metal and muscle; and the slight swing of a flit of brown hair on one side of the natural rainbow of near upside down facing color leaned down on one side of his view of the lake: and the slinky-firm contrasted raven haired, dark clad uptown model of a space wizard propping himself up against one of the younger maples behind him. Pale lavender purple and rusty toned stone chunks lining the path at their feet from well under his own where Tony settled a little slower  for that view alone on the same-stone little bench.

           It was the second time with Barnes in the frame of his mind since coming here; that he thought of the art that Pep collected.

      It struck him silent for nearly a minute; the soak of where he was and how he did see them a briefly miles-distant side thought by comparison; and the things he'd thought to break the conversation open with a thousand miles away from that.

           The odd creep of the garden copse mostly to his left felt almost completely absent from the scene; and if he hadn't been sitting right there, looking at the both of them? " Anthony..? " might have believed for a moment that he actually was, somewhere, completely out of frame; looking in at it.

        His eyes still ended up on Loki's face when he readjusted his shoulder under and in front of the shining reflection of the lake lower down, and  green-handed background of the lowest  hanging branches almost looking like they were following the slight curl at the end of that escapee section of his hair that never wanted to stay where he put it. It took him half a second to realize Barnes was straightening up from is stoop and bend to examine him from a few feet away too.

      " ..I'm fine. " had Loki's eyes narrowing briefly in suspicion at his face. " Mental snapshot while I'm in my borrowed sweatpants caught me off guard is all. " Made Barnes huff a pleased little laugh though. the sort that also had a little color jumping up to his cheeks that instantly and almost, made Tony wish he could tone down the little flush of color that undoubtedly came with the obvious-to-them reason why that was Barnes' reaction.

         James was still smirking about the obvious to him implications there; while Tony was shaking it out of his head and tugging his breakfast into his lap knowing very well Loki would start in on him if he let it get any colder. That gave their main interest the opportunity to take the space next to him it had taken up though. " ..in any case; " was started while Loki was still trying to decipher the fading color hovering over Stark's cheekbones: and a little unsure of the mirror he probably saw over the milder smirk Barnes was wearing when that look turned his way. " I didn't mean all of what I said, down there. I was agitated, and ... likely was looking for company in that; I apologize. "

        The long breath out and kick of the twisted tines to that weed pulling tool came with the kind of motion that said Loki had definitely succeeded in managing exactly that, but " Yeah, I get it. " sounded mostly accepting, where the apology went. " Not gonna get any easier the longer you hide out between the shelves though, you gotta know that. "

         " There's shelves down there..? " came out more side comment than question. " Looks like a junk heap to me, " actually gapped Loki's lips at Stark well enough for Barnes to grunt another surprise laugh before he stifled it one 'ha' in. " ..well, a few pieces excluded. "

             " It wouldn't be a heap if someone, hadn't fallen asleep watching the television and running the air conditioning on a low battery all bloody night! " was pitched enough to make Barnes almost fail at stifling another chuckle, and pause Tony from finishing chewing his hash. Which got one of the weeds snatched from the little wheel barrel and tossed at Barnes' shoulder, while Tony swallowed to ask " ...so where's the shelves then, and also ...battery? "

        Jimmy just brushed his metal shoulder off with a single swipe, looking oddly happy if not amused as he leaned into the handle of that long twisty thing nodding at Tony.

     A small sigh beside him. and Tony could feel the answer coming well enough to put another big bite of cheesy potato hash in his face: brows up at the Trickster. " This place was created well before electricity, and adapted mostly to fit in visually. It's more become a place to sort and store things on their way to another location. The power lines may run up here; but I assure you they've been off since ..the sixties...? I think. " a small shrug stopping himself from trying to figure out what year, most likely. seeing Tony was interested seemed to help him keep going. " Initially the Shimmering Scales was mostly above ground, and initially served more as a meeting place, or halfway point for the four of us, and what friends we trusted with it. As people started coming through more regularly around the French-Indian Wars looking for places away from the colonies to trade and settle however.. it became apparent things had to be shifted about and below. "

        Barnes started to settle on the lavender bricks too, while he considered the next bit of the story. " By then, I already had a decent collection in size alone. Barges sinking in the Great Lakes were a common thing, and I enjoyed pulling the ones I thought I might salvage and refit, out. Cutting into the bedrock and holding back the clay and eventually water; meant a ready power source needed to be created whether we were powering in-house, stationary relics; or technology. It's been running on our combined efforts along those lines for centuries, at this point.. and isn't prepared for a switch over, as it were. "

           " Meaning...? " was between bites, while Barnes snagged the juice box and gulped down a few swallows. Bit distracting, but they were talking shop logistics; and that was hard to get Tony away from. " The battery is ..rechargeable; and lasts about a century without extensive use. The system; is designated to prioritize varied functions over others. Living quarters and the lake barrier in particular-- "

              " Like; keeping the whole lower floor from draining a portion of the lake. " was admittedly a little impatient on his part. " What about the shelves. You said, there were shelves. "

         " They're pure energy, is why. " knocked Tony's mental map of the place into a sorting mode, of sorts. " And they are also less shelves, than lines on which everything was held suspended up nearly to the ceiling, and in order. "

      Oh. Ohhhh!

        Now that sounded fun.

    " It's almost been a century with little use, and then .. fridge running, air conditioner, TV, speakers, sometimes the holo.. all the lights. "

  " You crashed out his parts box, because living quarters basics and the water shield slash stealthy lake hole thing are top priority at the end of the battery's life. That definitely explains how out of whack the piles down there are so far out of what OCD I've seen and felt the last few weeks. You knew he was comin' here just to clean up your mess, didn'cha Jim?  " made Barnes shrug sideways and chuckle before finishing off the juice. 

         A little quiet. A brief narrowing of Loki's eyes at Barnes that maybe lasted two seconds.

     And then Tony realizing how far off from what he'd wanted to tackle in dragging Loki out there with him, rather than letting him retreat back into that very same hole in the ground underneath them. He couldn't help but try and grab hold of that comfortable energy while it was there, rather than try to pry open a less comfortable one later. " We have some stuff to talk about, on the personal end soon enough; but. I think I'd like to see if we could modify and use something like that at the tower; if you're up for it when we get back. Probably be a lot less clunky than the current landing pads we've got going on, among other things. "

             " Wouldn't that be a little dangerous, dangling the Jets and Knives over the building and Park Avenue? " was something Tony was grateful Barnes didn't miss a beat for.

      " Nah, not if we pair it with clamp rings for added safety and my own reactor tech; if it works the way I think it might. And! " fork pointed at Barnes briefly " You in particular, getting in on gently nudging the Wakandan side of things might just score us some vibranium for that and spare or replacement parts for your arm. " made Buck squint at the stones a bit while Tony turned " ..what did they make the new ones outta anyway? " on Loki.

           Only to find himself being watched, more than anything.

                Quiet. Uncertainty. A clear question as to whether or not he should answer.

                At least, that's what Tony thought it had been.

                  " You mean it, don't you. " had Tony's eyes settling briefly on Barnes.

          One nod, small; " Trust me enough to get back there; and I'll keep showin' you how much. Including the recording of the long ass argument dragging the facts of the last four years out of Thor, in front of almost the entire team.. or teams; if you wanna. " 

              " You definitely wanna! " came out real fast and with way more enthusiasm than even Tony felt for it or ever thought he would, from Barnes. He was grinning wide. " You shoulda heard him, Lo. And seen him... I barely had to say a single word. He did not, let him get away with avoiding answers. Put down an ultimatum. Half the time it was like sitting next to a box of fireworks while the fuse was lit. "

          It wasn't that Tony wasn't amused.

         If anything, it was at that exact moment, sitting there with the one brunette grinning ear to ear starting to excitedly jabber at repeating what were apparently some of his favorite quotes from their 'committee'  with the rest of the Avengers the night before yesterday; while the other darker brunette smirked his way through to a laugh at the first shared piece on his right: that Tony realized.

       Loki quirked his brow. Barnes just grinned wide enough Tony could see both dimples when he said it in between chuckling quotes: 

                  " Yep. I actually do pull and am attracted to, a very particular type. "