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They can barely open the door with how many bags they’re carrying, and once they’re inside, Hitoshi lets out a breath he wasn’t even aware he was holding. They had been at the mall, courtesy of Hizashi, who saw the amount of clothes that Hitoshi arrived at their home with and demanded he take him shopping. Hitoshi was embarrassed at first — because of course, he knew he didn’t own much, but he thought he was doing well and being called out would make anyone feel bad. However, he also chalked it up to Hizashi being dramatic, because Aizawa, unlike him, is very much a minimalist and doesn’t care for having a closet full of articles of clothing. Which means that Hizashi is just the type to hoard clothes and thinks anyone who doesn’t is simply insane.
That quickly changed though when Aizawa gave his input, and to his even bigger surprise, he agreed with Hizashi. Which he almost never does when it comes to trivial matters like clothes, so it meant that his situation really was as shocking as described.
So, after a long week of what could be considered begging, Hitoshi relented and agreed to go shopping with him, even if the day would be full of guilt. Because of course, the money being spent couldn’t possibly be his, as Hizashi had insisted. They ran around the big mall for what seemed like an eternity, Hitoshi trying on so many shirts and pants that he lost count, and Hizashi gushing like he was a child (which made his face so red from embarrassment because it attracted the attention from workers, who also came to help them.)
And so, that’s how Hitoshi ended up in his current predicament. He has four boxes of shoes, new jewelry for his piercings, and maybe 20 different shirts and around 10 pairs of pants. Or more. He’s not sure anymore, the only thing he is sure about is that the money spent was way too much and the guilt may eat him alive.
“So… wanna try everything on?” Hizashi says with a bright smile, way too enthusiastic for a man who spent the whole day scrambling around.
Hitoshi grimaces, placing the bags on the living room floor and staring at the marks on his arms. “Maybe later. I need a break.”
He decides not to mention the obvious, the fact that he doesn’t really need to try anything on because Hizashi already knows what he got, but he’s grateful and he won’t say anything that could be considered negative. Hizashi is very excited about doing this for him and Hitoshi is yet to understand exactly why. In his mind, he doesn’t deserve anything from them, since they’ve already given him more than he could ask for, a roof over his head and daily meals. So this is an unnecessary, added expense that he can’t fathom being enjoyable.
The cats quickly rush out from their hiding spots and sniff the bags curiously, immediately trying to go inside like anything there is for them, which makes Hitoshi snort softly.
Hizashi frowns, then pats his arm with a smile. “That’s okay, bud. We can just wait for Shou.”
Hitoshi thinks about the inevitable fashion show Aizawa will be subjected to once he gets home, and his face flushes in embarrassment. He thinks about how he’ll see the sheer amount of clothing he bought and will most definitely feel some type of way because he’s not naive enough to believe any of it was cheap.
“Thank you… you really didn’t have to do this, and I really want to pay you back at least something.” Hitoshi nearly begs, looking at Hizashi with furrowed brows and so much guilt he’s starting to get a headache.
Hizashi opens his mouth in shock, then shakes his head dramatically. “Shinsou, no! Absolutely not, how could you suggest that?” He yells, and Hitoshi flushes an even brighter red.
Hizashi seems genuinely offended, more than he’s ever seen him in the time he’s known him, and that makes him feel even worse.
Then, he calms down, adopting a softer tone. “I did this because I wanted to. If you pay me back I will take great offense because I enjoy doing things like this for the people I care about.”
Hitoshi wants to bite back with something like, ‘exactly how many people have you taken on shopping sprees?’, but he hyperfocuses on the part where Hizashi says he cares about him, and all his defenses fall.
“I know, but… this is too much. Really, I don’t think I’ll need to buy anything for the next 10 years.” Hitoshi looks around at all the shopping bags, frowning. “I feel bad.”
Hizashi makes a sad face, softly squeezing Hitoshi’s shoulder. “Why would you feel bad about this?”
“I’m not used to this whole thing. Having people, I don’t know, care?” Hitoshi grimaces at the word, foreign in his vocabulary. “I’m so—“
“Hey!” Hizashi cuts him off suddenly, making him jump. “I get how you feel, Shinsou. I really do. But you don’t have to apologize. I wouldn’t have done this if I didn’t want to.”
Hitoshi looks away from Hizashi. He used his given name instead of a nickname this time, and the notion shocks him.
“I hate the people in your life that have made you feel like you don’t deserve as much as a simple shirt.” Hizashi admits, tone serious. “And I hate that you feel like you don’t deserve one. But you do, and I want you to understand that.”
Hitoshi looks back into his eyes, frowning. He’s gotten to realize that the life he’s lived is unhealthy, that the way he’s been treated is wrong, but having someone else acknowledge that so openly is unfamiliar. It makes his head spin because there’s almost no room for questioning if Hizashi really means it.
“And don’t think I’m doing it out of pity. I did it because I could and I wanted to.” Hizashi finishes, squeezing his shoulder one last time.
Hitoshi deflates at that. In a soft way, of course, because he definitely did feel embarrassed at being seen as a charity case and being dragged from store to store, but hearing Hizashi reassure him that’s not the case helps him feel just a little less… weird about the whole thing. Even though he most definitely still feels guilty about the arrangement — being taken in as a foster by two of his teachers because his living situation was so bad that he really couldn’t play it off anymore. And while they insist that they took him in because they wanted to, Hitoshi still can’t help but feel like he’s on a free trial that will be suspended once they realize exactly why he’s such a problem in the foster system.
It’s still difficult to fully accept Hizashi’s reassurances, because he knows that while Hizashi would never tell him, he spent maybe a whole paycheck (or more, damn.) on just clothes. For him, who has proven time and time again to be a burden.
“Still, though. I know this wasn’t cheap.” Hitoshi argues, falling on the couch with exhaustion.
Hizashi waves his hand dismissively, as if he’s talking nonsense. “Don’t worry about that. I would have spent more if the stores weren’t about to close.”
Hitoshi feels somehow even more guilty once he hears that, and drags his hands down his face.
“You just enjoy your new clothes, alright? That’ll make this young lad happy.” Hizashi grins, pointing at himself, and Hitoshi holds back a smile. Both because Hizashi calling himself young is humorous, and also because of the warm feeling that spreads in his chest at his words.
“Okay…” Hitoshi agrees dejectedly, biting his cheek. “Thank you, Yamada. I’m really grateful.” He smiles genuinely, cheeks still red.
Hizashi pulls him into a small hug, which makes him freeze up, not yet used to the affection. He smells like cedar and amber, and he holds him securely. It’s… odd, but not completely unwanted. “Don’t thank me, just keep smiling. It looks good on you.”
Hizashi says it with a tone so truthful that he feels a bit embarrassed, like he has been the whole day. He’s always deadpan, and if he isn’t, he’s smirking in that way that he knows will rile someone up — but aside from that, he never really smiles. And though that might be true, it’s hard not to around Hizashi. He’s everything cheery and sunny, and he manages to make everyone’s mood just a bit better. Most of the time, if he doesn’t count the times he screams so loud his ears throb.
“I’m going to go take a shower, but Aizawa should arrive in about…” Hizashi trails off dramatically with a raised eyebrow, checking his watch. “Some minutes. You should, too, stinkabutt.”
Hitoshi nods, letting himself sink into the couch while Hizashi bounces away after ruffling his hair. He stays there for a good while before sighing, just looking at the amount of bags in front of him, full of things that he always kind of wanted but could never have. And now he does. Which is weird, he’s not used to getting… spoiled like this. Or in any sense of the word. And he really does want to get up and wash away the day, but he’s just so tired that if he stands up, he thinks his legs might shake like jelly and make him faceplant onto the floor.
He watches the cats, somehow still interested in all the bags, and carefully plucks one off the floor and places it on his chest, laying back against the couch. Soft. Heavy. Warm. It immediately makes his body tingle with a sweet feeling, one that only occurs when he’s surrounded by them, because unlike humans, they’re perfect. Sometimes grouchy and antisocial (like him, honestly), but perfect.
Hitoshi pets the cat, the other one now on his lap, and lays like that for a while until the front door inevitably opens. He doesn’t jump like he usually does when his foster parents get home, and he allows himself to feel a little proud of himself for that. The fact that he’s not as terrified as when he first got to the house.
Aizawa walks into the living room and pauses, staring blankly at the display. Hitoshi half asleep on the couch with two cats on top of him, and so many shopping bags on the floor that it looks like it’s about to be Christmas in the middle of summer.
Hitoshi turns to look at him, face falling immediately, and sits up on the couch. The cats scramble to welcome Aizawa, who just raises an eyebrow.
“Yamada took me to the mall. I really did try to make him spend less but, y’know…” He trails off, and he doesn’t need to explain himself, because they both know just how hard it is to say no to Hizashi.
Aizawa makes a noncommittal noise, and right then, Hizashi appears from down the hallway, patting his wet hair dry with a towel. He smiles big when his eyes land on Aizawa, bouncing over in excitement.
“I took our boy here on his very first shopping spree! Wanna show him what ya’ got, listener?” Hizashi ruffles his hair for the 20th time that day, and he gives up on fixing it. Hitoshi feels mortified now, because even though it seemed like a lot of bags at first, they seem like more now that there’s someone else in the picture.
Aizawa grabs a Hollister bag, spinning it in his hand with a long hum. “You’re boujee, kid. And set for life.” He adds jokingly, staring at the amount of clothing.
Hitoshi flushes in embarrassment, rubbing the back of his neck. “Yeah… I’m sorry.”
Aizawa squints at him, and Hizashi waves his arms around indignantly. “I told you, don’t apologize! I wanted to do this, and I really, really like spoiling you.”
Hizashi laughs, taking the bag from Aizawa and pulling out a pair of jeans, placing them over his hips and striking a pose that he himself would never do.
“These are nice, right? I spared no expense for this cutie right here.” Hizashi wiggles his brows, making Aizawa huff.
Hitoshi prepares for a complaint from Aizawa, maybe telling Hizashi that he should’ve notified him before making such extreme purchases. The more pessimistic side of his brain thinks about Aizawa saying something like him not deserving any of it, but to his shock, Aizawa actually smiles.
“Well, what’d you get?” He turns to Hitoshi, hands on his hips. He pauses, looking between the both of them, who don’t look the least bit stressed about the whole ordeal. If anything, they look happy. Proud.
He’s surprised that Aizawa cares about this. He’s never really seen him care about anything unless it’s cats, training, Hizashi, or newly, him. So for him to show interest in something so normal as to what he got from the mall makes his stomach turn. It’s new, and strange, but he doesn’t focus on the slightly uncomfortable feeling. He’s emotionally drained.
Hitoshi nods awkwardly, standing up and beginning to show everything he got, which makes him realize just how much he actually did.
He opens a small bag, full of piercing jewelry (most of which he did himself and had surprisingly not gotten infected). As soon as he sees it, Aizawa makes a small noise of confusion.
“I don’t get the whole point of having metal in your face.” Aizawa comments, earning a whack on the shoulder from Hizashi.
“It’s cool! He kinda looks like a rockstar.” Hizashi laughs, then points at his own ears, full of piercings and gauges. “It’s not that strange.”
“But they aren’t on your face.” Aizawa drawls.
Hitoshi touches his eyebrow piercing self consciously. Sure, maybe the piercings make him look slightly more intimidating than he usually does, but he doesn’t have that many. And while he respects Aizawa very much, he’s also a grown man that doesn’t care for self expression, so he wouldn’t really understand.
“It’s for the vibe.” Hitoshi defends himself, placing the bag back down on the floor.
“And your vibe is rad. You’re unique.” Hizashi compliments him, and Hitoshi can tell that Aizawa, though he doesn’t say it, agrees. Which makes him feel flattered but also a bit sheepish.
“Thanks…” Hitoshi looks away from the piercing stares, grabbing another bag hesitantly.
The rest of the night continues just like that, Aizawa giving his usual dry input, and Hizashi exclaiming like he had no idea what was in the bags and didn’t approve each purchase beforehand.
It’s nice. He’s still guilty, and he still feels like a big burden in their wallet, but seeing their approval and hearing them argue about which article of clothing is better than the other, Hitoshi feels almost at home. He allows himself to selfishly feel good about the day and Hizashi spending so much, because he never gets to enjoy things like this, and for the first time, he wants to feel not horrible for being the new addition to their lives.
After showing Aizawa everything he got, it gets pretty late, and he’s exhausted and his feet still hurt and all he wants to do is go to sleep. So, he says his goodnights and stumbles towards his room (his room, that he doesn’t need to share with other kids and doesn’t need to hide things in if he doesn’t want them to get stolen) with all his shopping bags, leaving Aizawa and Hizashi alone in the living room.
Hizashi stares at Hitoshi until he fully retreats to his room, and turns back to Aizawa.
“How much was all that?” Aizawa whispers before Hizashi can say anything, rubbing his temples.
“All you need to know is that my card didn’t decline.” Hizashi says casually, not seeming the least bit worried.
Aizawa hums, pulling his husband into a soft hug. “Thank you for making the kid feel wanted. Even if it meant you spending thousands at the mall.”
Hizashi laughs, wrapping his arms around his waist tightly. “You two need to quit thanking me, I have a shopping addiction and it extends to you both! I’m a family man.”
Then, he says more softly, “I like having him here, Shou.”
It pulls at Aizawa’s heart strings, and he knows better, knows that it’s dangerous, but he’s grown attached to Hitoshi. He’s gotten used to wishing him goodnight, to seeing him sitting at the dining table in the mornings, to taking him to school — he’s grown accustomed to all the small, mundane things in his life now that Hitoshi’s a part of it, and while that’s great, it’s not guaranteed that he will stay with them forever. He’s still in foster care, and the only reason he’s placed with them at the moment is because of the lack of interested families, but… he likes living with him.
Aizawa is not a very sentimental man, as said by most, but Hitoshi brings out a part of him that he often keeps hidden. It’s terrifying.
“Me too.” Aizawa says, allowing himself to be vulnerable. Then he sees Hizashi’s eyes beginning to get full of tears, because he knows the reality of their situation too, and quickly abandons all sentiments.
He sighs tiredly, backing away from the hug and stretching out his arms. “I wanna get him new headphones and a tablet.”
Hizashi makes a happy sound, and it’s how Aizawa knows he succeeded. “I know, right?!”
For the next few weeks, Hitoshi lets himself enjoy what it’s like to walk around with new shoes on his feet and clothes that don’t feel uncomfortably itchy or on the brink of ripping from the seams. He lets himself enjoy the compliments about his style, and he lets himself feel like for once, something is truly his.
Hizashi continues spoiling him, even after he already has a full closet that barely closes anymore, and Aizawa insists on buying him gadgets and tacky t-shirts that say things like ‘I hate everyone’ with realistic cats and rainbows.
He still feels guilty, but it’s not that stomach churning guilt that made him feel suffocated. He adapts to being a part of their small family and being an added expense. He knows it’s not permanent, but for the meantime, it’s perfect.
Later on, when he gets a job at the local cat shelter, he spends most of his paycheck on both his guardians, plus the cats, and lets himself feel just a little more free.