Chapter Text
You feel a tug on your stomach...
You awake in a field, same as you have too many times. Your mind is fuzzy, buzzing like a bad hangover as the scent of burnt sugar washes over you. You can't remember what you did in the past... many, many loops. You're out of practice, struggling to remember your lines. It's fine though; The actors remember their lines; you can simply improv.
You make your way out of the field into town, coming across Mirabelle. You can't remember the last time you spoke to her. But the words flow on their own. "Hello Housemaiden, how are you on this fine day?"
"Hello? I'm fine?" She stares at you strangely as though you said or did something weird. Which you definitely just did, but it's fine, you know what you need to tell her, even if not the exact line.
"Hmm, are you familiar with the Carrot method? I hear it's quite effective for making shields," you wink, with a flourish for good measure. "I'm going to do the Favor Tree thing now."
"Thanks? Uhh..." she calls confused as you walk away, very decidedly not towards the Favor Tree. That went... fine, you decide. Yes, you are off-script a bit, and yes, she noticed, but it's fine. It's fine. It will be fine. You just need to get things back on track by talking to Odile.
You casually stroll into the shop and come face to face with Odile. Exactly face to face... you're too tall, you shouldn't be the same height as Odile. You feel queasy, burnt sugar burns your senses. You can't, you can't, you can't-
"Can I help you?" Odile... inquires, is the only description of the way she asks, with that tilt of her eyebrow, and the clear distrust in her eyes.
She knows, she knows, she knows you're off script, she's staring straight through you. Stars, why did you go to Odile? Of course, she'd know right away. You feel sick, nauseous, like you're about to puke, but with no stomach or throat to do so. The words tumble out before you can even think. "N-nope Researcher, just leaving now," You hurriedly back up, tripping over yourself and landing on your butt as she glares you down. 'Bye!" you pull yourself up and dash out of the store bumping past Maribelle who'd just entered.
You need to... Bonnie, surely you can fix things by just... talking to Bonnie. You make your way to Bonnie, resting your hands on the fence she's leaning on, the one she's always leaning on and... T h o s e a r e n ' t y o u r h a n d s. Those hands and arms are lightless speckled with darkless dots... stars! Stars! Your arms are the universe speckled with stars! Your everything shudders, your vision blurring as burnt sugar floods your senses. You don't look down at your body, but you already know it's the same. You can see it in your mind, like a memory repeated a thousand times over. The stars wrap around your body like a constrictor squeezing its prey. Your skin flares and snaps under the pressure as you collapse in on yourself onto the ground.
"HEY! ARE YOU OKAY!?" You hear a panicked yell and realize Bonnie's been watching you the entire time. "DO YOU NEED HELP!?"
"Okay!? Okay!? When have I ever been okay Kid!? Certainly not now! Maybe before the loops perhaps!? Before the loops, before the loops, loops... loops... Loop! I'm Loop. "Ha ha HAHAHAHAHAHA! I'M LOOP!" You run your hand across your face, feeling the tears streaming down as you hiccup. "I'm... Loop..." You go still, the stars peppering your body freezing solid.
"I... I'm gonna get help okay! Just stay here!" The kid says as they run off. You pay them no mind, however, because you just had a sickening thought: 'If I woke up in the field, where is Stardust?' The Favor Tree, of course, they have to be at the Favor Tree. This is just the universe playing a little prank on the two of you. Yes, you need to get to the Favor Tree now!
You nearly trip over yourself as you sprint through town, pushing past people with no regard. You need to find Stardust, you NEED to find him. Then you can... you can sit at your spot under the Favor Tree and give advice, as you always do. And, they must be sitting there waiting for you to show up, wondering where you are to "help them on this wonderful new loop."
You pass the Fighter in a rush, not even registering his presence. Arriving at the foot of the Favor Tree, the Favor Tree absent any figure sitting under it, absent STARDUST sitting under it. "NO, NO, NO, NO, NO!" Stardust can't be.... Your every sense burns with sickeningly sweet sugar. "STARDUST! STARDUST!" Your head buzzes, everything hurts, your light dims as you stress your every bit of willpower. Your legs wobble as you make your way to that blinding tree. "STARDUST! WHERE ARE YOU!?" You wish and wish and wish until the smell of sugar fills up your non-existent lungs and nose so densely you choke on it, but the universe does not hear your cries. "PLEASE STARDUST!" You smash your fist into the Favor Tree: "Stardust... I wish to the Universe, this is just some silly prank, please... just... loop back."
You feel a hand gently but firmly grab your arm, stopping you from punching the tree again with your already bloodied hand.
You smack it away, and feel your hand ache in pain. "Don't touch me Fighter!" You shakily push yourself up, vision blurry as you attempt to stare down the Fighter, fists firmly tightened.
"Whoa! Hey I'm... I'm not trying to fight." The Fighter raises his hands in surrender. "Listen... we can talk things out" The kindness in his eyes, you remember they're the same as when you first met Isabeau.
Your face falls as your fists unclench. You don't want to fight him, you don't want to do anything. "What's the point, Fighter? It won't bring back Stardust. It won't end the time loops, it won't solve anything." You breathe in, and out. "Just leave me be." You don't look at him, you couldn't bare the expression you know he has, the one you can see without even looking. It's too much. It's all too much.
You hobble over to your spot under the Favor Tree, and collapse into it, wishing desperately that this is all just a bad dream, and that when you awake, Siffrin will be waiting there for you with his dumb hat and stupid grin. Laying there absently, with your hand ringing in pain, and the universe mocking you, you drift to sleep for the first time, in a very, very long time.