Work Text:
the janitor sighed as he looked at the main cast. of course all the cast decided to go on a beach episode. doubtless, he'd have to sweep up excessive amounts of sand from the hospital, or mop up blood when someone inevitably got injured.
sure enough, five minutes later, he heard a distant scream and the distinctive sound of blood coating sand. "can you believe this shit" he said, looking at the audience, "its always on a friday. why is it always friday"
the audience laughed, but did not say anything
"yeah, yeah, laugh it up" the janitor grumbled. "you're not the one that has to clean up afterwards"
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The janitor took out the mop bucket and started to wwipe the floor clean of whoever's blood was spilled. The tune to his work, his grumpy groans. The audience watched with baited breath ready to see who got injured, and if they survived. The janitor rolled his eyes, and yelled out at the audience, "Wow look over at the characters who aren't even on stage. Meanwhile, no one pays attention to me, the lowly janitor, but I have dreams to you know! I remember getting the lead role in my school production."
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the janitor sighed. "they don't even have the budget for actual blood! this is cranberry sauce!! they blew out all the budget on the set! i bet you noticed that the main characters weren't in this episode as much, didn't you?"
the audience paused. they had in fact, noticed that chris and hone's latest romance subplot had been put on pause for the episode.
the janitor snorted. "yeah, they couldn't get them for too many lines this episode. why do you think i have so much screentime?"
Just then, a loud voice shouted from off screen. The janitor stood up straight, looking around frantically, then began to run away.
"GET BACK HERE! YOU ARE UNDER ARREST FOR BREAKING THE FOURTH WALL!" the voice called.
"YOU'LL NEVER CATCH ME ALIVE!" the janitor screeched, before tripping over his bucket and faceplanting into the surf. The audience cheered as he was dragged off screen and the broken fourth wall was replaced with a new one. The End Yippee