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“Egg?” Loppezz asks, voice soft. He looks up from his phone, sitting on the couch he and Wemmbu bought together.
“Yeah?” Egg prompts, and she looks to the side nervously. Uh oh. “Yo, am I in trouble?”
“No!” She protests, and walks over. “Just like. I kinda… wanted to talk about something..? Like, something I’ve noticed.”
She said he wasn’t in trouble. Egg nods carefully, and sets his phone aside. If Loppezz is upset with him, he just might be cooked honestly.
“Okay so. Like. I was just–” She takes a seat on the couch, facing the tv, but watching him. He's a little– mm. She said it wasn’t baaaad. Loppezz sighs. “Minute kinda– well. You act… I’ve kinda noticed you act a little like, different around Wemmbu, I guess?”
And Egg– blinks. Huh.
“It’s not bad, but I figured like. If you wanna talk and maybe… figure out, what your guys’ p– what you two like, are. I guess.” She tilts her head. Uhh. Was this how Wemmbu felt when Minute teased him out the other day? Wait, is this because of that? Pause–
“How do I– How do I act different,” He asks eventually, feeling a little– uncovered. Like a bug when you rake the leaves. Stupid ass analogy.
She readjusts. “Well, I don’t wanna like– call you out, but you– well. You’re like a whole different person with him. You’re a little more… I don’t know, emotive? You like to be with him, and you two are like never apart, I had to basically drag him away for this conversation.”
Loppezz pauses, glances at him– is she gauging his reaction?– then keeps talking.
“And you’re more relaxed when you’re with him. And like, he makes you more open to things you aren’t usually open to. Like when I asked to go to Chicago, you only agreed when he poked you about it.” She continues. Egg kinda feels like his whole worldview just got knocked askew. She noticed all of this? Before he did? That’s actually– it’s almost funny. It’s definitely aura loss.
“When we both were out of town, and looking for a catsitter, you wouldn’t let any of our friends help. But then Wemmbu volunteered and you were– like, you were just okay with it. Right away you were.”
“I was,” He agrees, staring at the wall. That’s– Wemmbu knows Orbit though, better than any of their other friends. That’s reasonable. Right? Right? Is he crazy?
Hm. The problem is, Loppezz isn’t wrong. She’s scarily close to right. He– hm.
Loppezz moves like she isn’t sure what to do with the silence.
It’s a lot to process. He knows he does all of that, that Loppezz isn’t exaggerating or anything. But it’s still–
“But it’s Wemmbu,” He says, genuine, and turns to look at her. Her eyes narrow slightly, and her eyebrows seem worried. Like pity. Is it so bad that he’s getting pitied? Oh he’s cooked.
“Egg, that’s–”
“Okay, yo, wait I see it,” He laughs, and leans back, looking away again. It just feels right to act differently, because it’s– isn’t that just how they are? “You might be right. Bad response.”
Loppezz gives him a pitying smile. “Yeah. That’s a little bit of a– that’s a crazy response.” She laughs a little nervously, then gets serious again. Fun. A weight sets into his bones. Ohhh… “But– you know that like–”
“No, I know, man,” He hums, and traces a pattern on the wall with his eyes. “But it’s–”
He stops. It just seems normal.
“A lot?” She interrupts, and he nods agreement. Close enough. “I get it. It’s always kinda crazy realizing you have feelings.”
Feelings. Oh god, what are they, high schoolers?? Bro. This– does he even have feelings? Like, romantic ones? Because that just… kinda doesn’t feel right. He doesn’t want Wemmbu dating other people though. Except that’s lowkey corny as hell he can’t say that.
And she’s– Loppezz is right. He doesn’t– he feels differently about Wemmbu. How is he a full grown adult and realizing he’s– gay? Bi? Wait. He’s not straight. Wait. Holy crap he’s not straight. Wait what the fuck. What the hell. He–
“I’m not straight,” He realizes out loud. Loppezz gives him a shaky smile. “Wait. Wait. That’s lowkey– This is kinda huge news.”
“Yeah,” She says, and bumps their elbows together. He tries a smile. He likes. Not girls??
He isn’t caught up on all the… the labels. But he’s. Egg isn’t straight.
“Don’t spiral,” Loppezz chimes in, grabbing his wrist. Egg lets her, and tries to focus on her hand. It’s just– kinda a lot?! Like. Woah!! “It’s okay. You’re valid, whatever you are. It’s okay.”
“Bro, he hates me,” Egg suddenly worries, and turns to Loppezz, eyes wide. He’s been secretly leading Wemmbu on for like years, using their friendship as like a– “I’ve been– like, you don’t do that–”
“No, Egg, he doesn’t hate you,” Loppezz tightens her grip, and grabs his upper arm. He blinks, trying to lock in. “Oh my god, listen.”
“I– okay,” He accepts, and waits. Crap. Wemmbu might crash out.
“Okay. Listen. Wemmbu doesn’t hate you. I think you’d have to do worse than– just liking him romantically.” And that word twists in Egg’s chest. Not right. “Point is, you d–”
“I don’t like him romantically,” Egg argues because it feels… weird. Wrong. Loppezz gives him a look. “Yo, alright, I– maybe we’ve got… a little something more than… whatever. I like him as more than a friend, but not like a boyfriend.”
He feels like a highschooler. Talking about crushes. Crazy immature.
“Are you sure you’re not trying to bottle it up?” Loppezz asks, squinting at him.
“Dude, I pinky promise.” He nods wisely, and Loppezz flashes a smile. “But like. I don’t know if that’s just being good friends, or if– bro, I do not fuck with labels. This shit’s so complicated for no reason.” He huffs, and moves his gaze to the TV. Which is off. So there’s not really a point in looking.
“I can feel that,” She agrees, and they lapse into silence. He uh. He feels slightly scrutinized. Watched. Allat.
“So uh,” he says. She nods, and her eyes are so– welcoming? It’s. It’s really nice actually. This whole thing is insane. He’s not straight. And he’s learning this because of Wemmbu of all people. “I. Hm. Okay bro.”
“That’s okay. There are options other than dating,” Loppezz offers, like an invitation. He didn’t know that.
“Like what?” He raises an eyebrow, smiling. His heart is kind of racing. He can– there’s more?
“Well, there’s this thing where it’s– it’s like dating, but without romance.” She continues. Egg immediately wants to grab the idea and hold it to his chest. He wants that. He wants that actually, a lot. But–
“Brother that’s called being friends,” He deadpans. Loppezz makes a noise.
“Wha– no it isn’t ! It’s like,,, more than friends, but not romantic.” She tries, gesturing around. And he wants that. It’s lowkey a little embarrassing how his heart rate picks up. “It’s called QPR. Queer-platonic relationship.”
He tries to not get excited. Lock in. Lock innn.
“Uh, what’s it like. About?” He questions instead, looking at her. She hums. “In more detail.”
“Well, there’s– uh. I honestly don’t know a lott about them, but like. It’s–” Loppezz sits up straighter. “Well, society views a lot of things as things that like, friends can’t do. And a QPR… well, it’s a relationship where those things are okay. Once you talk it over with your partner.”
Partner. He’s gonna puke.
“Uh– mhm.” He manages, and tightens his hand on the couch. Uh. Things feel a little shaky.
“You okay?” She asks, and leans forward. Egg turns to her, loosening his grip.
“Totally,” he jokes weakly. Yikes. “Just. Mm.” He blinks repeatedly. “I’m learning a lot tonight.”
“Sorry,” Loppezz frowns, and leans back.
“No you’re– brother, you’re entirely chill. See, this is my own fault. I need to be– to open my chakras.” He soothes, and breathes out shakily. “For real though, you’re like. Real as fuck for uh– like, being my guiding angel to realizing I’m–”
He stops. He’s… what ?
“… you’re queer…?” Loppezz tries, tone so soft. He stiffens anyway.
“I– uh. Well.” Lock in dude. Speak. “I-It’s– it’s– I don’t– holy shit. Oh my god. I cannot speak.”
Loppezz laughs, still soft. He shakes his head, and joins her for a breath.
“I’m yapping. I guess that like, I don’t really know. I’m not uh, super locked into the LGBTQ meta. Don’t know all the words and stuff.” He finally gets out, and she laughs. It’s reassuring.
“Well, if you like– okay, you d– we don’t have to talk about this right now. If you don’t want to.” She looks up from her lap, hands fiddling with her jeans.
“Nah, I’m good. We can talk now.” He allows, and she nods.
“Okay. Well, there’s gay, which is if you’re just interested in men, and there’s bi, where you’re interested in more than men. I know that like, you said you don’t like labels though, so you can also just use queer as an umbrella term.” She explains. Egg tries to process that all.
… he just likes Wemmbu. But there’s absolutely no way he can say that. Like, ever. To anyone.
“Alright. And– is it an option to like, not really vibe with anybody?” He asks, because that’s close. Almost a hit. Only one error is a pretty good rate, honestly. He graduated with way worse.
“Yeah! There’s, uh,, aromantic, which is a spectrum of not really feeling romantic attraction, and there’s asexual, which is not vibing with sexual stuff.” She answers. Okay. Yeah. He’s getting it now. Maybe. He hopes.
“I think prolly both of those, lowkey,” he puts forward. Loppezz offers him a smile.
“Yeah?” She prompts, sounding chill again. He partially hopes they’re done with serious talk. Because ffffhhhh self discovery is a scary thing. “That’s awesome. Congrats, dude!”
“I– woah. I just like, came out to you.” He says. Woah. “Pff– that’s new, man. Haven’t done that before.”
Loppezz grins, and turns toward him. He turns to her in response, anticipating some sudden movement.
“Do it like– for real. Like say I’m Egg and I’m queer. It feels cool, I promise.” She goades.
“I’m Egg and I’m- queer.” He parrots, but that really– okay. Woah. That felt better than he thought. “Bro.”
“I know!” Loppezz beams, and shakes her arms out. “It feels weird, right?”
“A little,” he responds, not entirely over it. “It’s honestly a little fun. I’m– wait what was that other one? The arow..?”
“Aromantic? And asexual?” Loppezz supplies, and he nods repeatedly. “Sometimes they’re called aro and ace.”
“Cool. I’m that too. Aromantic and acesexual. This is a little insane. This is kind of coo-coo bananas Loppezz.” He huffs out, trying to calm his nerves. “Yo, I was like, lowkey nervous to say that. Even though you’re the one who sorta brought me here, y’know?”
“It’s scary, man,” She nods, calming down with him. Most goated person ever.
“Thanks for like, doing that,” He acknowledges.
“Of course!” Loppezz grins, and looks around her, moving.
“What’re you–” he starts, confused.
“Where’s the remote?” She asks, looking up. Uh. “We deserve to relax after that.”
“It’s um,” Egg shifts to look for it. “Oh hey, my phone. It’s right here though.”
Loppezz takes it from him, and turns the Tv on. It opens to a random channel, with ‘relaxing rain audio.’
Egg breathes out and slumps down.
“That was a whole can of worms brother,” He says, and Loppezz laughs in relief, switching to Netflix.
“Yeah,” She admits, and huffs. “I’m glad we talked though.”
“Yeah,” he agrees, nodding to himself. He stares at the screen. “Dude. I’m like– not straight. That’s wild.”
“It’s fun! We can match.” Loppezz grins, so he looks over at her, confused. “Like, with being queer.”
“Ohhh,” Egg nods, looking forward again. “Yo, I’m lowkey dull.”
And Loppezz laughs at that. And after– well. Hearing her laugh is basically the most comforting thing in the world, after that conversation.
Loppezz turns on Queer Eye.