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Bill held his hands loosely at two and ten on the steering wheel of the Loser’s red van. They were driving straight for the pink-orange sunset just like every happy ending, but this was just the start—the start of the Losers Club away from Derry.
“Billy, how much longer do we have?” Stan’s feet were thrown up on the dashboard, his shoes scuffing the already wrecked plastic that covered the glovebox.
Stan looked comfortable curled up in the shotgun. Bill loved it, the way that Stan’s skin glowed in the soft golden light and how he laughed at everything, even Richie’s shitty jokes. Getting out of Derry made Stan softer, happier, and definitely calmer.
Bill could hardly take his eyes off his boyfriend long enough to drive the car.
“We have no pl-pl-place to stay tonight. It’s van n-night so we’re going as far as we cuh-cuh-can.” A collective groan echoed throughout the boxy car.
Bill smiled nevertheless; he was just happy to be experiencing this with his friends. His best friends. He watched through the mirror as Richie and Eddie shared a soft kiss in between whispering together. He couldn’t see Mike in the mirror, but he heard him curled up and passed out on the dirty floor.
“I don’t want to sleep in the van while it's moving again. Eddie takes up way too much space to get any sleep. He kicks!” Richie yelled from the third row.
Eddie grumbled before elbowing his fiancée in the shoulder.
“How about you pull over, and we can put the seats down. That was fun the other night when we did it, huh?” Stan pulled his feet down so he could stretch his hands up to the ceiling.
They had been going for some time.
“If we wuh-wuh-want to get to California by the e-e-end of this week, we gotta go a l-little farther tonight.” Bill pushed on even though he knew he was losing the battle.
Beverly and Ben were chanting something about pulling out, and Bill heard a small cheer about a smoke break.
“Fine, fine. You all know the only r-r-reason I’m agreeing is because tuh-tuh-tomorrow we’re driving through the night.” Another chorus of half-assed groans.
“You need a break more than any of us do, hon,” Stan muttered happily. He sounded as drugged out as Bill felt.
The van was pulled to a stop on the edge of some back road in Nebraska. Cheers filled the enclosed area, and several hands patted Bill on the shoulders, followed by calls of good job, Dad. “Okay, everyone out. Stretch your legs.” All windows rolled down, and all doors flew open. There’s nothing like seven straight hours in the car. “Beverly and Ben, you get the third row tomorrow because I’m not listening to Eddie bitch anymore.”
“Okay fuck that.” Bev was lying out on the cracked road like a starfish.
Richie’s sunglasses were slipping down her nose, but her freckles stood in the golden glow of the sunset. She looked ethereal. “Richie and Eddie lost Uno, so they sit in the back. Stan won Uno, so he sits in the front. It’s the rules of Uno.”
“That you fucking made up along the way!” Eddie yelled from his spot on the ground.
He was sitting in the tall grass far away from the road. His legs were stretched out in front of him, covered in bruises and band-aids from their adventure in Iowa.
“Oh shut the fuck up, Eddie. If you hadn’t been literally riding Richie’s dick the entire time, maybe you could’ve won, but -”
“At least I wasn’t riding his dick in the van for everyone to hear!” Bill looked over the arguing group with an unexplainable sense of pride.
They were closer than ever now that senior year was done, and with each hour in the car, they became more and more inseparable. It was perfect.
“I love you.” Richie was sitting on the edge of the road with his back pushed up against one of the back wheels.
He was grinning ear to ear in the now silence that fell over the group. His glasses were ditched years ago for a happy pair of contacts, but now, without the blocker, his blue eyes glowed wet and happy. “Y’all are my best friends in the world.’
“Y’all,” The group replied in unison.
Richie and Stan argued nonstop as they pushed the seats into the van's floor. It wasn’t even about the seats; it was just Richie and Stan arguing about anything and everything, just like they always did. Bev came over to sit next to Eddie when she realized that the small boy wouldn’t come out into the road with her. Bill sat next to a half-passed-out Mike.
“Mikey, do you hear what this rascal is saying?” Richie called from the inside of the van. Stan was pacing around, looking hella pissed.
“I don’t think it’s safe to sleep with the windows down.”
“We’re in bumfuck nowhere, Stanny boy!” Richie screamed, throwing open doors as Stan rushed to close them. “Maybe if you’re lucky, a little birdie will fly in bird boy.” Richie was cackling at this point.
Eddie sighed before pushing himself up from the dirt.
“Okay, Rich, settle down. Stan, we need air, and Richie, it’s dangerous to leave the windows open. We’ll crack the windows,” Eddie said, holding onto his boyfriend’s shoulder tightly.
Mike threw his first up from his place on the ground in agreement. It was the most movement he had made since the Losers had peeled him off the floor.
“Mike’s agreed. It’s settled.” Richie clapped loudly. Stan looked like he was going to spit on his friend.
They began to set up for the night. Bill made sure their bags were tightly tied to the top of the van while the rest of the group pushed and fluffed all the blankets inside the truck. Not one car had passed them since they stopped. It felt like they were the only ones in the world.
“Bill, I think they’re good enough. Come help us set up.” Stan’s voice called from behind Bill, who couldn’t help but smile at his boyfriend.
“I just don’t want to lose an-an-anything chickadee.” Stan rolled his eyes at the nickname, but still leaned forward so they could kiss.
Bill loved to kiss Stan, and standing outside in the sweltering heat and golden sun, they had their first “alone time” in a week.
“Mom! Dad! Mikey won’t give me my pillow!” Beverly screamed while throwing her legs out to kick the couple.
Stan leaned back to press his forehead against Bill’s, muttering something about family vacations. With a deep breath, Stan crawled back into the van to their group.
“Get in here.” Stan’s hand came out to grab Bill. The leader finally allowed himself to bend down and crawl after his boyfriend. “Mike, just give Bev her pillow back.”
“It’s the best one, and it’s not fair she gets it every night.” Mike held the red pillow close to his chest while Beverly grabbed at him.
Ben wasn’t minding his girlfriend and seemed to be engaged in a conversation with Richie, who had a sleeping Eddie in between his legs. It was a complete mess.
“Guh-guh-give Bev her pillow. We can buy you one when we p-p-pass the next Walmart,” Bill sighed, making sure Mike gave up the pillow before he allowed himself to relax.
They were sitting in silence for the first time in hours on some Nebraskan back road. The sun was barely above the ground, and it would be dark in the next hour. Bill got one good look around the circle. They were all so old now. Too old to jump in the quarry and too old to play in the barrens, not that they ever wanted to anymore. Old enough that the prom was a past thought, and bullies were back in the day. Bill would be lying if he said it didn’t hurt.
“Remember when Eddie threw his fanny pack over the quarry?” Richie looked around at all of them with a soft smile.
The boy was still asleep in his lap, his hair curling around his face now long and unmanaged.
“He wasn’t even saying anything,” Mike added with a laugh, forgetting about the pillow situation.
“He just screamed for like a minute straight.” Stan leaned back against the car's wall next to Bill, smiling. “I thought it was Richie when I first arrived, but there Eddie was screeching and throwing pill bottles everywhere.”
“Shit, we wuh-wuh-were like 14.” Bill rubbed at his face. Apparently, all of them were thinking about their age as well. “I just r-r-r-remember Richie’s face clear as duh-duh-day. He looked like he s-s-saw God.”
“I thought I did. I looked at him and realized that I was going to marry that boy one day, even if I had to lock him in my basement.” Bev squealed loudly at the word marriage, but before anyone could say anything about it Richie pulled Eddie’s body up to the smaller boy’s face, and was by his chest. “Eds, we’re talking about you.”
“Woopty-fucking-do, Rich, what’s new?” Eddie muttered, his voice heavy with sleep.
“When you threw your fanny pack off the quarry, and I fell in love with you, did you know?” Eddie smiled to himself but still held his eyes closed.
“I knew something changed, but I didn’t know that you wanted to marry me.” Richie flushed while the rest of the losers howled with laughter. They fell into a brief silence before Eddie pushed himself up wide awake on Richie’s lap. “Remember when Stan thought that Bill was in love with Bev.”
“Hey, that was totally understandable for me to think,” Stan muttered, letting his head fall across Bill’s shoulder. “They kissed twice, and Bill kept in touch with her the most over the school year.”
“We just talked about you and Ben. Mainly, how Bill thought you were in love with Mike.” Bev was now lying across the length of the truck, all her limbs stretched out. It was comfortable. “William actually believed you were in love with Michael.”
“Beverly, it’s still not as desperate as you were when you asked Benjamin to the dance. It was the first day of school. Homecoming wasn’t for like two months,” Stan spat back without malice. He was right, though; it was very desperate. Bill just remembered Ben being so flustered and nervous. He said yes, of course, but the two decided to ignore each other for the next week. It was horrible.
“Nothing will ever be as bad as Richard’s promposal for senior year.” This wound was still fresh because it had only happened a few months prior.
Richie groaned loudly, hiding his face in Eddie’s neck. The smaller boy was already shaking with laughter.
“The balloons were everywhere, and don’t even get me started on the glitter!” Ben punched Richie on the shoulder, but the boy was too busy being embarrassed.
Bill did something straightforward for his promposal. Taking Stan out bird watching was just enough for him to say Yes, thank God. Richie was different, though he had to do something big for his “baby boy”.
“Imagine being the one who had to attach all those balloons to the ceiling.”
“Imagine huh-huh-having to sneak into the principal's office.”
“It wasn’t even a good song!”
“Hey, yes, it was kind of horrible, but none of us will ever forget it. Eddie won’t forget i,t, and that’s all that matters. Make something last in my sweetheart’s mind.” Richie kissed Eddie’s temple roughly.
“Who said I won’t forget?” Another round of laughter from the whole group.
It was dark now, but they could view the outlines of each other. Ben had fallen asleep first, using Bev’s chest as a pillow, much to the amusement of the Losers. Richie went down next with his glasses still hanging off his nose. Mike was curled up, sharing the red pillow with Bev, who was snoring loudly. Eddie had tried to stay in the conversation with Bill and Stan, but he couldn’t help nodding off with Richie’s arms around him.
“We should sleep if you want to drive through the night tomorrow,” Stan muttered, followed by a long yawn.
He was buried in Bill’s neck. Bill had his body wrapped around his boyfriend, getting a view of the ceiling. Richie and Eddie had been sleeping sitting upright, and there was no doubt they would feel it the next morning.
“Yeah, you’re right.” They shuffled together. The car wasn’t big enough for the entire group, but who really cared if Richie’s legs had to weave over or under their bodies or if Mike had to sleep half in the front seat?
“I love you.”
“I love you too.”