Chapter Text
Afterwards, hours afterwards, lying on his apartment floor with his dead dog wrapped in a towel on his chest, he hopes it was instant.
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But in the seconds following the impact, he just keeps pleading with Beef to hold on no matter how much it hurts. As he kneels on the sidewalk, jeans soaking up the rain, the little whine gives him hope.
“It’s okay, bud. It’s gonna be okay. Just…Just hang on, please.”
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The cold is sinking in.
Most of his joints are, at best, a little fucked. He can already feel the ache in his knees winding tighter. He should get out of his damp clothes, get up off the floor, eat something, call someone, but each time he tries to move he feels the weight on his chest and he doesn’t want to let it go just yet.
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The driver who hit him doesn’t stop to help.
Robert wraps Beef up in his jacket, scoops him up and cradles him. Everything’s damp from the rain which started about a block into their evening walk.
Robert remembers thinking about turning back. Deciding not to.
A little rain won’t hurt us.
He can’t tell if Beef’s bleeding.
With one hand he starts tapping at his phone, trying to find the nearest open veterinary clinic.
Malevola, he thinks after a few seconds. She can portal them there.
He finds her name in his contacts. Calls her.
She doesn’t pick up.
“Shh, shh. Beef, it’s okay, I’ve got you. Fuck.”
He struggles with his touchscreen, standing out in the open like an idiot while the heaviest downpour in months pummels them like a bad joke.
Eventually, he finds an address.
“Okay, okay. Just a little longer, Beef, c’mon.”
He shifts his hold on the little dog, and Beef’s collar jingles.
In that moment, he convinces himself it’s movement – that Beef’s still fighting and there’s still time.
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He hopes now that he imagined the whine. That Beef didn’t know what was happening. That it didn’t matter how fast Robert ran. That he was gone from the instant the car hit.
The towel smells like the vet clinic, but when Robert presses his face into the short black fur on top of Beef’s head he still smells like…well…like Beef. It’s faint, growing fainter by the minute but for now, at least, it’s still there.
He’ll let go once it’s gone.
He’ll get up once it’s gone.
Just a little bit longer.