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Eddward typically hated his life. It wasn’t so much the matter of hating himself, seeing as he was proud of the intelligent being that he was growing to become, it was more of the fact that he hated all the factors that played a part in his life to make him so disregarded.
He hated his small body that couldn’t take a beating better and would always end up aching and bruised much more easily than that of a larger man.
He hated the jock bullies that would press him up against a wall and either beat him into the ground or press up against him until he would involuntarily get an erection, and then drop him on the ground talking about how much of a ‘fag’ he was.
He hated the cheerleaders who would run up and hug their jock boyfriends and smirk down at his bloodiest mess of a body and say some snide comment about how he wishes he could have a dick like their significant others, from which he could only think if that’s what it makes me become, then never in a million years.
He loved his parents but hated that they were always gone so they couldn’t see – but he figured that was for the best. His parents always raised him to be a good, strong kid. What would they do if they knew he was being broken down every day he went to school? His father would probably pat him on the back and tell him to stand up for his beliefs and his mother would tell him to don’t get into unnecessary troubles.
He hated a lot of things, and he disliked plenty of people. Ed and Eddy were his only two friends, really, and he would always cherish them, as strange as they were.
One person, however, that he was never able to get a definite read on, was Kevin. Kevin, a jock who had a wonderful track record after he joined the football team and worked hard to get where he was, a jock who never seemed to be around when he was getting beaten – a jock who has never beaten him, as shocking as it was – a jock who had even gone so far as to ask for help so his grades were better.
At first, Edd thought it had been a grand ploy to corner him in his empty house where no one could see, where he could have his way with him and then show him off to his jock buddies. Many images had flitted through Edd’s mind the first time he came over, and Kevin had even commend how stiff he was throughout the whole meeting.
Hey, Edd, what’s the deal dude? You okay? You’re really jumpy.
Oh, dear, I apologize, I’m sorry, I just…it’s nothing.
You look like you’re going to jump out of the window. What’s the deal? Am I making you uncomfortable er somethin’?
I just…if you’re playing with me, if I’m some sort of a grand plan you and your buddies have, to get me alone and beat me up – they do a good enough job already of it and if you’re going to do it I wish you would just hurry and –
Woah, wait, wait, hold up Double D. You think I’m here to beat you up? You’re getting beaten? By who? Tell me their names, right now. I’ll set ‘em straight. You gotta –
Edd didn’t think it was possible for Kevin not to have known, but the look on his face was sincere. He didn’t think the makeup that his mother had stashed away worked very well, but apparently it had been better than he thought.
As he had said, Kevin must have spoken to the others. Edd noticed the beatings were lessening, and they were now avoided his face and arms to prevent the knowledge of them beating him.
He was immensely grateful.
But it also seemed too good to be true. Kevin never bullied him, per se, but they were never friends either. They just happened to live in the same cul-de-sac. They belonged in two totally different crowds, so he didn’t know why Kevin would interfere with his life whatsoever, let alone try and help him. And the more he thought about it, the more it didn’t make sense, so for once in his life, Edd didn’t think about it.
Somewhere down the line, though, he had fallen desperately in love with Kevin. There was never a single inkling in his mind telling him he would fall in love with the auburn haired, stubborn jock of an acquaintance of a teenager. Quite frankly, Edd didn’t think he would ever fall in love. Especially in anyone that went to his school.
Alas, it was doomed to fail before he could even set it off. Keven wasn’t even homosexual, let alone interested in a shy nerd as he was. He dare say Kevin would start hurting him as well.
No. There were more pros to cons about keeping his emotions secret, as there were always.
And he would like to keep it that way.
~oOo~
“Hey, Double D, I don’t get this. Actually, I don’t get this entire freakin’ section. Or math. I don’t get math either. If you do my math I’ll do your English. It’s a fair trade, right? Or I’ll pay you to do my math. Please?” Kevin threw his pencil on Edd’s desk and rubbed his eyes tiredly, which he couldn’t help but think was cute.
“You’re doing fine, Kevin. You’ve even improved a letter grade since the last test. I know you think math is deplorable but it’s a necessary skill to learn if you wish to graduate,” Edd chastised the other as he leaned down next to the slumped shoulders of his acquaintance.
“Can we take a break? I think my brains fried.”
“It’s been 30 minutes.”
“Yup. It’s been 30 minutes, and I’m surprised I lasted that long. C’mon, for a little while. There’s gotta be something else in your house to do. Please? I’m beggin’ ya, here, man.”
Edd refused to roll his eyes but simply stood and nodded. “I suppose you could use a break. It would be of no use to not be focused on your work. I actually have some videogames that you could play for a little while. They’re over in that cupboard. If you’ll excuse me, though, I must use the restroom.” Edd could feel his stomach clench in response to the wounds peppering his ribs. They need to be tended to.
Kevin nodded, a minute look of surprise gracing his features. Edd supposed he thought that he wouldn’t have such trivial pastimes like that. Which was true. Edd didn’t even know why he had them either. His parents must have brought them home at some point for Eddy.
Whilst Kevin was busy looking for a game Edd slinked off into the bathroom.
Instead of heading into the other room where the shower and the toilet were located, headed for the cupboard above the sink, which was filled with various forms of healing salves. Taking out the most necessary one, Edd stripped himself of his shirt and stared at himself in the mirror.
He was pale. Pale and lanky. It shouldn’t come as a shock to him, but he was. Short, pale, and lanky. Purple and blue decorated his skin, making him appear like a battered wife in an abusive relationship. It was probably accurate to say he was.
Edd shrugged and sighed. It was no use figuring out all the qualms he had about himself, especially when he could use that time to try to heal. With no more arguments towards himself, Edd picked up and unscrewed a soothing cream, dipping his fingers in to address his wounds.
As the first touch hit his chest, Edd could nearly sigh in comfort. Adorning this on his body always made him feel slightly healthier.
“Hey, Double D, I can’t find the – Double D?” The door creaked open suddenly, causing Edd to nearly jump out of his skin and knock the salve off of the sink.
“Kevin! Oh, I apologize, I’m sorry, let me just –,” Edd scrambled to close the jar and search for his shirt. Whilst he was doing so Kevin opened the door all the way. He struggled to get his shirt over his beanie, causing it to slip off in the rush.
“What is this?” Kevin questioned, quietly and angrily.
Edd froze under his shirt. “Uhm, it’s just –,” he squeaked, wondering why he was so illiterate in times when he needed it the most.
“You’re still getting hurt?” Kevin asked again, stepping closer. His voice seemed to quiet a little, this time in a bit of soothing. It appeared that he saw the fear in his body. “By the team?”
Edd sighed and removed himself from his shirt once more, ignoring the bright red blush that sprung to his face. “I’m sorry, it really did lessen. Thank you for your concern. I feel much better, I promise,” Edd mumbled, covering his body with his arms in hopes of crawling into a hole.
He didn’t want Kevin to see him like this. It would only support his notions about the auburn-haired teen never wanting him. Even if he were homosexual, Kevin surely would much rather it being someone from his own team. Someone handsome.
He hated being under scrutiny of his dearest the most.
Kevin released a breath and stood next to him, picking up the salve. “Here,” Kevin said, calmly. “Move your arms.”
Edd blinked, registering what the other was saying. When he did, his arms began to flail. “Oh, you don’t have to! I can most definitely…”
Edd drifted off when he say Kevin bend down, pick up his beanie, and shove it over his head, over his eyes. “There you go, Dork” Kevin muttered. “You have your beanie now. You’re okay. I’m not gonna hurt ya,” Kevin reasoned.
Edd didn’t have it in him to say he would never be scared that Kevin would hurt him anymore.
Edd shuttered out another breath and listened to the unscrewing of the salve lid, and the next thing he knew, cold fingers were massaging his stomach in a mass of bruises. The blue-eyed nerd lifted his arms to bring the beanie farther down on his face, shaking in embarrassment.
He could feel Kevin’s hands on him everywhere. Like most of the jocks, his were rough with calluses, and in general a man’s hands. Unlike most of the jocks, they weren’t trying to see how far his hand could be shoved into his ribs, instead calmly trying to heal him.
It was embarrassing how good it felt. Edd wished he had enough self-confidence and reliance to take the other’s hands off of him, but Edd was starved so much even for a little helpful touch that he couldn’t stop it.
And it wasn’t fair to Kevin. It wasn’t fair at all…
“There you go,” Kevin soothed the shorter teen as he rubbed circles in the patch of bruises littering his small frame. “Turn around for me.”
Edd flinched and bit his lip to stop a moan from emitting. Oh, how he wished. He wished so badly. Instead, Edd did as he was told, turning in what he thought was the direction of the mirror, baring his back. Hands, coated with the cream, found his back again.
They were like that for a little bit, Edd shaking in embarrassment and Kevin massaging his back, working out the muscles around the bruises. He was gradually feeling better, the pain unfurling out into more of a dull ache.
When Kevin was done, Edd could hear the spin of the cap closing. Glad he could school his face out of the disappointment he felt behind the beanie, the black-haired teen had the means to straighten himself up. Before he could do so, however, a body had pressed him against the sink, a warm shirt sticking to his massaged back.
Suddenly a panic welled within him. This was it, wasn’t it? Was Edd wrong? Could Kevin really just have had this plan to beat him? Was this what it was?
Edd’s chest began to contract and in panic. Please, no. Please don’t be this cruel. He didn’t know if he could take it. Please don’t let this be –.
“Hey, calm down, Double D,” Kevin’s voice flittered past the cloth of his beanie. Kevin’s hands were gripped his waist tight, holding him in place, but one came up to remove his beanie from his head and back onto the floor.
The room was too bright and Edd could feel the fear bear down into him.
“I’m not gonna hurt ya, kid, I promise,” Kevin ushered out. “But, you do seem to have a problem,” Kevin reiterated as the beanie throwing hand fell down to the front of Edd’s pants, which were suspiciously tighter than before.
Out of shock that he was, indeed, hard, Edd’s eyes flickered up into the mirror. Watching him was Kevin.
Edd immediately dropped his gaze to avoid eye contact. “I’m sorry, it must disgust you,” Edd whispered.
Kevin pressed him farther into the sink. “Does it?” He asked playfully, and Edd was suddenly aware by the grinding behind him that Kevin was, very much, as hard as he was.
“Kevin…?” Edd asked, in shock.
“Man, Double D, you have no idea how much I’ve been tryin’ not to jump ya this past month? I’ve been suffering through math just so I could be closer to you and then you go and let me help you with your injuries and looks like you didn’t even know how hard you were – a man only has so much restraint, you know,” Kevin growled out.
“You…?” Edd squeaked.
“I’ve been trying to get your attention forever. Finally I came up with a plan to get me around you this much. I mean I really did need the tutoring, but I was originally just gonna go to something the school set up, but then you – you’re just, you, so I thought what could be the harm in it,” Kevin explained as he ground into Edd’s rear.
Edd’s face felt as if it was on fire, and he couldn’t really think properly. Kevin was trying to say that he…?
“Look, I like you, a lot, and I was gonna ask you on a date at some point, but you’re just too cute,” Kevin continued. “And I really hope that you like me too.”
Edd couldn’t help but burst out and shove Kevin back at that moment. His mind couldn’t handle what was happening. Kevin stumbled back, shocked, as Edd turned around and covered his face with his arms and crouched on the floor, breathing heavy.
“You can’t, oh dear, I’m dreaming, this is a dream, this can’t be happening,” Edd muttered to himself. “This has to be a joke, are you making fun of me? Where are they? Did you get the rest of your friends in my house at some point? I can’t – I can’t do this if you did, you broke me already, just please don’t –.”
“Woah, woah, woah, Double D, Edd, Eddward, calm down,” Kevin rushed forwards from the point he had been pushed. He crouched next to the stuttering kid and hugged him, rocking him back and forth on the ground. “It’s just me, okay? It’s not a game, or whatever, dude. I really, really like you, Edd. Please don’t think I’m trying to hurt you.”
Edd sniffled. “Why? They have to know I like you. Did they tell you?”
“No,” Kevin promised. “They didn’t. I didn’t even know until you told me, really. I didn’t know, Double D, I promise. I just knew how much I liked you.” Kevin reached to wipe some stray tears from falling off of Edd’s face, who at least didn’t flinch.
“Why?” Edd sniffled again, clinging to himself tighter. Kevin furrowed his brow and stood suddenly, pulling Edd up with him. The shorter of the two stumbled up.
Edd was forced to look into the mirror once more, and he immediately zeroed on Kevin’s angry face.
“Look at you,” Kevin said. “I like you because you’re hilarious in your own way. You’re smart and you care and you don’t deserve what everyone’s giving you. They don’t know you. We’ve lived in the same cul-de-sac since forever, and I still got to watch you play outside with the two other Ed’s, and I watched you grow into this beautiful cute as all hell teenager who stumbles around awkwardly almost all the time. Look at yourself in this mirror, and then look at me, and tell me if I’m lying.”
Edd, surprised and sniffling, stared at himself in the mirror as Kevin told him. He didn’t see anything special, other than an embarrassed face that was destroyed by his tears. But as he looked at Kevin, he could see the sincerity pulled up between two worried eyebrows immediately. As they met eyes, Edd gasped softly as he felt a rush of need drift down his body in a hot wave.
His eyes were burning.
Kevin seemed to stare at him like he was the Holy Grail. Edd had never been stared at like that, like he mattered, not even by his own parents. It was a foreign feeling and Edd couldn’t even be embarrassed because he was so shocked.
Kevin’s face devolved into a smile, and suddenly they were in the same position as before, with the taller teen’s hand slipping into the front of Edd’s sweats again. A hand cupped him through his briefs and help him there, while Kevin’s lips were brought down to kiss him on his neck.
“See?” Kevin hummed quietly. “I’m not lying.”
Edd gaped and nodded hungrily, in need this time, and backed his rear against Kevin’s own growing erection. In turn Kevin gasped quietly, before smirking into the mirror.
“Aren’t you getting a little bit needy?” Kevin questioned as he pinned Edd farther down to the sink, watching his expressions through the mirror. “How long have you liked me, Edd? How long have you wanted me to do this?”
“You – you tried to help me,” Edd whispered. “Even if the beatings didn’t stop, there were less of them. I…I was really happy you would fight for me,” Edd said, hiding his face when he spoke with his arms once more.
Kevin smiled and slid his hands into Edd’s dampened brief’s, beginning to stroke the other underneath him. Edd gasped and wetted his lips, the sensual feeling more than he ever imagined when doing this to himself.
“I’ve liked you for a while longer, to be honest,” Kevin said conversationally. Edd could feel his eyes on him. “You were out playing with Ed and Eddy about a year back, planning again, or whatever you guys get up you, and you were smiling so happily and I thought, I wish I could get you to smile like that,” Kevin watched the mirror faithfully as he continued to stroke Edd’s cock, fingers sliding over the head every now and again. “You were so cute. And then you’d come back to school so unhappy I just wanted to help you.”
Edd was brought to tears once more, wondering what he had done in life to become this privileged. Anyone would kill to have Kevin, star of the football team, to talk to them like this. Edd himself would slice down legions. And to have it be said that Kevin had liked him for some time? Edd didn’t know what to think of that. He was just so… so happy.
Edd jumped and moaned obscenely as Kevin’s other hand came down to fondle his balls. The heat of being engulfed like that was making his whole body singe with need, the fire and the fury bearing down on him more than he could have ever thought possible. “Kevin…” Edd whimpered as he shielded his face some more. “Please…”
Kevin hummed into his neck. “Please, what?” He questioned, grinding himself into Edd’s buttocks.
“I need, I want – I need to…”
Kevin groaned and began to move faster. “Yeah, babe? You gonna come for me? Mess up those pretty little briefs for me?”
Edd whimpered. “Messy, messy, messy,” he said more to himself than anything.
“Yeah,” Kevin chuckled. “But I got you that way. You’re fucking my hand right now, y’know? You’re gonna make me come just from that pretty little face of yours. Let me see?”
Edd shook his head and moaned in denial as Kevin stopped. “Oh please no, dear me, don’t stop –.”
“Let me see you,” Kevin whispered in his ear. “And I won’t stop.”
Edd, against every fiber of his being telling him to keep his face concealed, groaned in frustration and let his arms drop. There he watched the mirror at his messy and destroyed face as Kevin started again, also watching him through the mirror.
“You’re so cute, so pretty, makes me want to eat you up. But that can wait. I’ll take you on a few nice dates, treat you like you should be treated,” Kevin hummed. “You look so good,” he continued, and Edd could feel Kevin’s erection leaking through his pants.
“Oh, please please please –,” Edd whimpered continuously as Kevin’s hand sped up.
“God, look at you, Dork,” Kevin said again. “You gonna come for me now? You can. Let me know how good I make you feel,” Kevin continued to talk and talk and Edd suddenly felt his erection convulse repetitively, shaking him through his rippling orgasm.
“Keeeevin,” Edd whined out as he felt himself spill all over from the pleasure of Kevin’s hand.
Kevin grunted and removed his hand from Edd’s pants, leaning back a little to shove his own hand down to stroke his erection. He only managed a couple of tugs, though, and suddenly he was coming too, staining the inside of his boxers with his release. “Fuuuck,” the other drew out under a breath.
Edd panted and hummed. “There’s really no need for cursing, Kevin,” he chastised, although not really meaning it.
Kevin chuckled and nuzzled back into Edd’s neck. “You believe me now?” He questioned with a smile.
Edd blushed and glanced down. “Yes, sorry. I do believe that I shouldn’t judge you for what your morals are, I just can’t be too careful.”
Kevin nodded and backed up, spinning Edd around. “Stop apologizing Edd, I know. I ain’t faulting you for any of that, Dork. Even if you don’t believe me all the way now, that’s okay. I just have to work harder to make sure you know.” With a soft kiss, Kevin then brought up the real question. “I bet your feeling pretty ucky right now, so how ‘bout we take a shower, okay?”
Edd never thought he loved the man more.
Thirty minutes and another hand-job later, Edd was tucked in a pair of fluffy PJ’s and Kevin with some of his larger clothes. The jock called his mom not long ago and asked if he could stay over, which she readily agreed to, knowing Edd couldn’t be much trouble.
“Your mom really is nice,” Edd commented with a soft smile. He was currently snuggled up to Kevin’s side in his bed, one arm lazily thrown around him and the other under his chin.
Kevin just as lazily stroked up and down Edd’s back, soothing him. “Yeah, she is. She’s cool about a lot of things. And it’s good to know she cares still, y’know? Some of the other guys on the team talk, and all I hear is how much they wished their parents cared a little more. Or how annoying they are when they yell at them because they think they have to, not for the better of the person. It kinda sucks.”
Edd’s chest clenched in sympathy, although not as much as Kevin’s probably did. “Yeah, it must be unfortunate.”
Kevin apparently heard something in his voice that made him suddenly hold tighter, because he was then pressing a kiss to Edd’s clear-of-a-beanie head. “I’m sorry they’re like that. It ain’t no excuse, and they’ll be gettin’ a beat down for it. Hopefully they’ll stop once they know you’re under my protection.”
Edd raised an eyebrow and sat up enough to look at Kevin. “You’re…you were planning on telling them? Of us?” He asked carefully. Edd didn’t know if that was such a good idea.
Kevin cocked his head and nodded. “Yeah, ‘course. I mean, unless you don’t wanna…”
“It’s not that. I just didn’t think that you would want to tell anyone. And, not that I doubt you, but some people won’t like that you’re involved with me, and might even try to hurt you, and I don’t want that to happen.”
“Mmn, I don’t want to hide us, if you’re okay with it. I want to be able to walk down the halls holding my boyfriend’s hand, taking him to classes and eating with him and stuff. And they might question my choices, I guess, but they wouldn’t dare lay a hand on me.”
Edd settled back into Kevin’s chest with a blush. “But you worked so hard for your popularity…”
Kevin snorted. “Dude, that won’t be taken from me – and even if it did – I still have Nat and a few others, and no one else matters. So it’s going to be okay.”
Edd giggled happily at the reassurance. If Kevin said so, then he supposed he couldn’t argue. Besides, the prospect of being able to hold Kevin’s hand during school too was just as fun. “Okay,” he agreed readily.
“Alright,” Kevin said. He then drew the covers up around the two. “Now get some sleep, Dork. We gotta big day tomorrow.”
“Okay,” Edd said again, humming and snuggling into the warmth of the others chest. He could smell Kevin all around him, a musky tone fused with some of his shampoo, and thought for a brief second that this must be what Heaven was like.
“Hey, Kevin?” Edd breached the silence.
“Yeah?”
“This might be too soon to say so, but over the last month or so I’ve, uhm…I really…”
“I love you too, Dork.”
“Oh.”
Kevin snorted sleepily and ruffled his hair. “It’s okay, you don’t have to say it yet. I’ll wait as long as you want.”
Edd felt his face head up as he buried his head in the blankets. “Kevin?”
“Mmn?”
“I love you.” This was embarrassing. But for some reason, this fear wasn’t unpleasant.
“Dork.”
Edd smiled and let his eyes slide shut.
There was a lot of things he hated, but Kevin would never be one of them.