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1. For Heaven’s Fake by MakeWayForBigCrossDucks

   Fandoms: Good Omens (TV)  

   • Explicit
   • Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
   • M/M
   • Work in Progress

   17 Feb 2026

   Tags

   • Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
   • Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
   • Muriel (Good Omens)
   • Metatron (Good Omens)
   • Gabriel (Good Omens)
   • Beelzebub (Good Omens)
   • Agnes Nutter (Good Omens)
   • Anathema Device (Good Omens)
   • Hastur (Good Omens)
   • Nina (Good Omens)
   • Maggie (Good Omens)
   • Lucifer (Good Omens)
   • Mr. Brown (Good Omens)
   • Aziraphale (Good Omens)
   • Crowley (Good Omens)
   • God (Good Omens)
   • Jemimah (Good Omens)
   • Fake Dating
   • Pining
   • bickerflirting
   • Forced Proximity
   • But actually they both very much want it
   • Nonbinary Crowley
   • Autistic Crowley
   • AuDHD Crowley
   • Autistic Aziraphale
   • Out and proud Aziraphale
   • Autigender Aziraphale
   • Gay Aziraphale
   • Bisexual Crowley
   • Autistic Muriel
   • Heaven is a shitty homophobic town
   • Lucifer framed Crowley
   • We will squeeze in every possible reference whether it makes sense or not so help me God
   • bookseller aziraphale
   • There Was Only One Bed
   • But better yet
   • There was only one bed and nothing happened
   • twice
   • Homophobic Metatron
   • Metatron is a Carl
   • The Bentley is in there
   • But she’s not a Bentley
   • you’ll see what I mean
   • Yellow Bentley
   • Cw allusions to war
   • cw allusions to racism
   • cw financial instability
   • Cw’s may not be exhaustive
   • Muriel ships Aziracrow
   • And they think they’re being very sneaky about it
   • they/him pronouns for Crowley
   • He/Him Pronouns for Aziraphale
   • But he’s not cis
   • Season 2 Beelzebub is decent
   • Season 1 Beelzebub is an evil piece of shit
   • Book References
   • nonbinary muriel
   • Crowley has a penis
   • aziraphale has a penis
   • Fluff
   • Low-angst
   • cw abuse
   • cw ptsd
   • Mr Brown has the hots for Aziraphale and Crowley Does Not Care For It
   • So Crowley comes up with a Very Clever Plan that Definitely Won't Backfire
   • cw homophobia
   • Muriel and Aziraphale are siblings
   • Smut
   • Oral Sex
   • Flirting
   • Sexual Tension
   • Anal Sex
   • Frottage
   • Making Out

   Summary

   Crowley, stuck back in their dismal hometown of Heaven, Indiana after fleeing a bad relationship, wants to piss off their asshole ex. Their ex-boyfriend Aziraphale, dragged back to Heaven to look after his sibling, wants to piss off his homophobic father. Crowley comes up with the perfect strategy for doing so: They fake date each other. Obviously, this couldn't possibly result in any confusion or emotional complications. And it definitely couldn't result in an actual relationship.

   100% planned, 75% written. It'll probably come out to ~20 chapters, plus a couple deleted scenes.

   Theoretically updates once a week if the ADHD gods allow it.

   Language:

   English

   Words:

   23,840

   Chapters:

   6/?

   Comments:

   7

   Kudos:

   27

   Bookmarks:

   8

   Hits:

   560