Chapter Text
It hurt yet it felt so good
So fucking good
His mind was spinning he had no idea what’s happening, all he knew was life is perfect.
Till it wasn’t, till he opened his eyes and the white light of the medical quarters blinded his eyes, his whole body ached and the movement in his fingers was barely controllable, he felt numb, and empty.
Blonde hair swayed to the side as he propped himself up on his elbows to sit up, he could move just not everything. He felt so trapped and he felt as if he lost something. Which he did, he lost that damned fight but it felt like there was something more, something he craves…
“Zanka! Your awake”
A feminine voice interrupted his confusing train of thoughts.
The man called Zanka lifts his head slowly to see Eishia rush towards him.
The blonde girl seemed relieved.
“I-im so glad you’re finally awake, let me check your vitals real quick.”
He stays silent, he lacked the energy to talk or react.
Eishia finished her checks and started explaining to the patient.
“Your blood sugar is rlly low and it seems your body is still recovering from the poison, from what i noticed you are still partially paralyzed in your fingers and toes and have some issues with movement…but i have a feeling your gonna recover fast” she had a sweet reassuring smile on her face, shes really cut out to be a nurse.
“Thank you” zanka finally managed to answer. Shortly after he went back to sleep.
But his dreams didn’t want to let him rest, he was plagued by that terribly manic but beautiful grin only one could make. The one he had to thank for his current condition.
The so called nightmare seemed endless, he saw so many colors, at one moment he was flying the next he was falling into deep water, then he was with the raider again and felt his claws against his skin.
A snap.
He woke up, the blonde felt nauseous and was drenched in sweat. The dizziness was overwhelming and Eishia was on his side in a second.
“Oh Zanka you have a fever, I’ll fetch you some water!”
Zankas Mind was racing something was missing he missed something but what was it, he wont admit it but he knew what it was.
Without him noticing the nurse was at his side again and held a glass of water against his lips, once he acknowledged it, he took some sips, it calmed him down a little but not too much.
Eishia had no other option but to give him some medicine since he was burning up quite bad. The medicine didn’t work, it wasn’t strong enough, it was as if Zankas body was resistant, it must be because of the strong poison his body was starting to grow accustomed to. She gave him a higher dose which finally kicked in and his heartbeat calmed down, after some minutes the fever was almost gone and he was almost asleep.
“More…” and he passed out. Eishia furrows her brows and takes some notes.
There were no dreams anymore that night.
————————————————————————
He wakes up from a loud and beaming voice entering the room.
“ZANKA MY BOY!” Enjin. The voice obviously belonged to Enjin.
“Hello enjin” today Zanka felt a little better but still wrong. The thoughts and memories of the fight against a certain dread head never seemed to leave his mind. They plagued him, annoyed him kept him restless, but he couldn’t let the others know because the Zanka they know isn’t weak. They think he’s strong so he has to keep up that image.
“Are you feeling better? Eishia told be you had a fever in the middle of the night…”
Enjin cared about him, he was so glad he joined the cleaners. He could never imagine the nijikus caring for him, it’s just not part of their ‘family dynamic’, but the cleaners are different, they are his real family.
“Yes im feeling a little better, Eishia did a great job.” He gave Enjin a weak smile, it was supposed to give off the vibe ‘that everything’s fine’, Zanka got no idea if the older guy saw through it or not but Enjin just nods.
“Btw Eishia told me if you can move all your limbs again by tomorrow morning you’d be allowed back into your own room”
Zanka nods, that was a relief, seems he’s not in need of constant supervision.
When Enjin leaves the room the younger lets the discomfort wash over him again, he tried to push the thoughts away but that one specific man still wouldn’t leave his mind.
One thing he especially cant forget is the bliss he felt after he was stabbed with none other than the deadly weapon he hated so much.