Chapter Text
They’re making out on Jason’s weathered couch when he sees Tim’s erection, having paused for a lungful of air. Tim blinks his eyes open alongside Jason, and Jason can’t help but note the dilation of his pupils. He looks Tim up and down, drinking in the way the younger male’s hair sticks out in different directions from when Jason ran his calloused hands through the silky midnight locks. He focuses on Tim’s face next—the way his lidded eyes glisten with lust. Tim’s cheeks are flushed, and the tips of his ears are beginning to match. There’s a thin line of saliva connecting Tim’s lips with Jason’s–which should be gross–but Jason can’t help that he finds it hot as fuck. His lips are puffy from Jason utterly ravaging them, all soft and pretty for him.
“Jesus fucking Christ,” Jason whispers. The words aren’t for Tim, but his face turns an even deeper shade of red anyway. Jason can’t help but feel proud of the effect he has on Tim—the way he melts under his touch.
Jason lets his eyes travel further down Tim’s body, noting the way his collarbones stick out against his pale skin from above his T-shirt’s collar. It’s Jason’s T-shirt that Tim is wearing, worn with age and sporting Wonder Woman’s faded logo on the front. It’s so big on him. He’s in Jason’s sweatpants, too, a gray pair that Jason’s been missing for a while.
Guess that’s where those went, Jason thinks to himself with a smirk.
Tim’s erection is straining against the fabric, his arousal painfully obvious.
Jason wants to devour him.
He settles for attacking Tim’s neck instead. He licks a wet stripe just under the younger’s jaw, before firmly attaching his lips to the chosen patch of skin. Tim shudders under Jason’s touch, running his hands over Jason’s tanktop, tracing the outline of his chest.
“J-Jay-” Tim stutters, bucking his hips up into nothing. Jason’s on all fours, pinning Tim into submission as he takes his time suckling and kissing that spot on his neck. They haven’t gone further than this, not yet, but god does Jason want to. There are so many things Jason wants to do to Tim, enough that his head gets foggy and he starts to lose focus on anything other than marking Tim as his.
Jason pauses for a moment, pressing one final kiss to Tim’s neck before meeting his eyes. “Was that okay?”
“Mhm,” Tim hums, pulling Jason closer. “That was…good. Really good.”
Jason smiles and presses his lips to Tim’s in a chaste kiss. “Good.” He sits up then, pausing his assault, trying to ignore the way his core whines for more.
Tim sits up alongside him, his brows furrowed in confusion. “Is something wrong? Why’d you stop?”
Jason ignores the urge to avert his eyes, and forces himself to meet Tim’s gaze. He takes Tim’s hands in his own before taking a breath to steer himself. “I want this, I really do. But we gotta talk first, baby.”
“Like boundaries?”
“Yeah. Honestly we shoulda talked earlier, but you are very hard to resist.”
Tim smiles. “Okay. I can do that. I want you too.”
“I know,” Jason chuckles, looking very obviously from Tim’s face to his erection. Tim’s eyes widen, and he begins searching for a pillow to cover himself with. “Hey,” Jason says, his voice low. “It’s okay. I find it very hot that you have a raging hard-on for me. It’s a very big ego boost, y’know. That I can do that to you just from kissing. You can hide it if you want, but I like seeing you like this.”
Tim gulps. “Okay. That’s…okay. Yeah. I can do that.”
Jason raises an eyebrow. “You sure?” Tim nods. “Okay. Here’s what I wanna do, and you’re gonna tell me how you feel about it. Capiche?” Tim nods again, his expression growing bashful. “Cool. I wanna take your shirt off and kiss you all over, kiss your scars. And then I wanna palm you through your pants and jerk you off or suck your dick–whichever one you want. And maybe jerk myself off while I do it if I can.”
“Can I touch you too?” Tim asks, his eyes wide with want.
Jason can’t help but note the way his heart begins sinking in his chest. “That’s somethin’ else I wanna talk about birdy. Y’know how I got a cunt ‘n all that shit?” Tim nods. “I…sex hurts for me sometimes, Tim. I don’t…fuck…I can’t even jerk myself off half the time without it hurting me. It’s like a period cramp at maximum level and I don’t even get my fuckin’ period anymore. I want you, Tim, but I don’t think receiving is in the cards for me right now.”
“I could stop, if you wanted,” Tim offers, like the sweet thing that he is.
“Maybe I’ll take you up on that sometime, but…dunno I just…I don’t wanna get excited and then have to stop. It already sucks enough when I have to quit on my own.”
“Okay,” Tim agrees. “Does Bruce know? Are you seeing a doctor about this?”
“Haven’t exactly had the time between being a crime lord and part-time vigilante, babybird. ‘Sides, I don’t exactly wanna open up to the old bat about my sex life.”
“Thank you for telling me,” Tim says, and pulls Jason into a kiss. Jason loses himself in it for a moment, in the feeling of Tim’s lips against his own. The way his tongue explores Tim’s. The breathy moans Tim lets out that he doesn’t think Jason notices. They break apart again, and Jason finds himself gasping for air, his heart beating out of his chest.
With his right hand, he cups Tim’s face and brushes his thumb across the vigilante’s cheek. Tim’s skin is soft and smooth under Jason’s touch, like feathers. With his left hand, Jason slips a hand under Jason’s shirt, trailing his fingers up from Tim’s abdomen to his chest. He lowers his neck now, kissing just above Tim’s collarbone.
In response, Tim runs his hands through Jason’s hair, tugging on it slightly. It sends shivers down Jason’s spine, and he can’t help the moan that escapes his lips and muffles into Tim’s skin.
Tim asks, “You like that?” and Jason can practically hear his boyfriend’s smirk.
Jason hums in affirmation, letting his teeth brush against the spot he’s been attacking. He slows down, the harsh strokes of his tongue melting into gentle brushes, and pulls his lips away from Tim’s flushed skin. “Can I take your shirt off?” He looks up, meeting Tim’s eyes with his own. They remind Jason of a hidden grotto in the ocean, a deep blue blanketed by shadows. He could stare into them forever, just memorizing the way they ripple in different shades depending on the time of day. Tim draws him deeper every time, further and further from the surface.
“Yeah,” Tim whispers, so Jason does. He follows the tide of Tim’s form with his hands until the shirt’s fabric bunches around his wrists at the sides of Tim’s chest. Tim lifts his arms above his head, and Jason takes the opportunity to pull the shirt off and throw it by his feet. Normally, when Jason gets undressed–even just to touch himself (on those rare, rare occasions), he’ll hang his shirt up or fold it neatly on his nightstand. Jason doesn’t even spare a glance at the fabric he’s just tossed onto the floor. He stares at Tim instead, drinking in the sight of his bare chest.
“God,” Jason rasps, and it feels as if someone has sucked all of the air out of his chest. It’s not like he hasn’t seen his boyfriend shirtless before, but it’s different like this. He’s used to stealing glances in the locker room, or concern that washes over his chest at the appearance of each new scar. He’s not exactly trying to appreciate Tim’s physique when he’s ripping off the Red Robin uniform for a clearer view of a brand new stab wound. He wants to take his time and appreciate Tim’s body in the way he deserves.
“The name’s Tim, actually,” his boyfriend replies, a playful smirk resting on his face.
Jason wants to say something soft and romantic, quotable like a novel, but his brain is rapidly turning into putty. “You’re so fucking hot,” is what he says instead. It isn’t wrong, far from it, but it’s way less romantic than Jason hoped for.
Tim’s face flushes nonetheless. “I- thanks?”
Jason pauses and blinks once. And then again, like blinking will reset his brain. Because surely Tim didn’t just thank him for stating the obvious. “Did you just thank me for calling you hot?”
“Uh…” Tim pauses. “Is that not, like, the polite thing to do?”
Jason can’t help the cackle that escapes his throat, hearty and one hundred percent not sexy at all. “That’s not–” he wheezes, struggling to come up for air, “most people don’t–” Jason has to stop again, putting a hand over his chest to ease his breathing. He takes one deep breath. And then another, focusing on his lungs, expanding with each inhale and falling slowly as he lets out carbon dioxide.
“Are you okay?” Tim’s eyes are wide with concern now, and his voice is just a tad higher than it was earlier.
“Yeah, just gimmie a sec.” Jason wipes the watering eyes that threatened him with tears of laughter. “That was really funny. Wow. I can’t remember the last time I laughed like that.” Tim opens his mouth to reply, but Jason cuts him off. “And please, please don’t say ‘you’re welcome’ if you want my mouth on your cock at any point tonight.” Tim closes it, a pout forming on his lips. “I just…I don’t think I can suck your cock while laughing, baby.”
Jason watches the muscles contracting in Tim’s throat as his boyfriend swallows. “Right. Yeah. Makes sense.” Jason leans in to give Tim a quick peck on the lips before pulling his attention back to the bare torso before him.
Tim’s skin is incredibly pale compared to Jason’s, decorated with the occasional scar. The most prominent one is right where Tim’s spleen should be. Jason’s noticed it before, but he didn’t realize it’s like, exactly where his spleen should be. Jason files the thought away to be concerned over later. It’s not exactly hot to lick his boyfriend’s skin and then go, ‘Hey, what is this giant scar where your spleen should be? You still have it, right? Please tell me you still have your spleen,’ so he doesn’t.
Jason trails his fingertips across Tim’s bare abdomen instead, feeling Tim shudder as he brushes somewhere particularly sensitive. The whine Tim lets out is music to Jason’s ears, and he goes over it again, trying to keep his touch lighter than a feather. The sound is louder this time, although Jason can tell Tim is trying to hold it back. His hips buck up against nothing as Jason removes his hand.
“That was a little much,” Tim pants.
“Want me to stop?”
“I’m not sure,” Tim admits, and Jason cocks an eyebrow. “I liked it, I think. It’s just a little embarrassing.”
“We can pause for now,” Jason reassures, leaning down so his lips just ghost over Tim’s ear, “but those sounds you are making are absolutely delectable.”
Tim’s breath hitches. “Really?”
“So fucking hot. My dick is so hard right now, like I can feel it pressing against my boxers. I’m also pretty sure that if I were to take off my shorts, I’d find that my underwear isn’t exactly dry either.”
“Is it…where’s your pain at right now? Do you feel pain when aroused?”
Jason kisses him just for that, sucking Tim’s bottom lip into his mouth. God, Tim’s lips are so fucking soft and wet, coated in a mix of both of their saliva.
Jason lets himself kiss Tim for another thirty seconds before breaking away to answer. “A little. It’s at, like, a two right now, but I’m in pain most of the time, baby. If it gets to be too much I’ll let you know, okay?”
Tim nods. “Please.”
The pain is pretty dull right now, just the light throb of his pelvic floor. He takes a deep breath, which eases it a little, but never much. He’ll pause if it starts to feel like something is twisting his insides, but he’s good for now. Jason removes a hand from his exploration of Tim’s body and instead uses it to grasp his boyfriend’s chin, tilting it up. Jason uses the other to tease at the hem of Tim’s grey sweats.
“Can I take these off?”
Tim desperately nods, and Jason’s heart skips a beat in his chest. He and Tim are equals–always have been. Even when their relationship was incredibly rocky (like the dozens of times Jason’s tried to kill Tim, but he tries not to think about that), Tim always gave as good as he got. When Jason became a crime lord, Tim went and became Batman’s right hand man. When Jason joined the Outlaws and went on missions all over the world, Tim went and brought Bruce back from the dead. He went toe to toe with Ra’s al Ghul and got away. Suffice to say, having a man this incredibly strong with an even fiercer conviction, desperate for his touch is doing things to Jason.
Jason kisses Tim again. He’s lost count of how many times their lips have met at this point, but it’s just as intoxicating each time. Jason wonders if their lips were made to fit together like this, because it feels so right in a way that Jason’s never felt with anyone else before. Tim’s mouth is warm and hot and right against his. Jason loses himself in it, inching his hands down to the waistline of Tim’s sweatpants before running his index finger over his boyfriend’s bare v-line. Tim squirms under the featherlight touch, gasping into Jason’s mouth. Jason smiles into the kiss and pulls the sweats down when Tim lifts his hips above the couch. They part once more, just so Jason can take in Tim’s form again.
Jason licks his lips at the sight of Tim’s erection straining against his boxers. He doesn’t consider himself to be a sentimental person, but there’s something about Tim being so vulnerable under him like this that makes Jason want to take his phone out and snap a picture. He’ll definitely be thinking about this on the rare occasion that he jerks off, at least. He tugs the pants off of Tim’s ankles and throws it somewhere near the shirt before running a finger over Tim’s inner thigh.
He leans over to the point where his breath tickles Tim’s ear. “So pretty for me, baby,” Jason coos, and Tim shudders once more from his fingertips. “Sensitive, too. Do you ever touch yourself like this?” Jason bites at Tim’s earlobe as gently as he can, barely grazing his teeth against it.
“Not- not really,” Tim admits, his breath beginning to come out in small pants. “Didn’t think to-”
A wide smile creeps over Jason’s lips at Tim’s admission. “Good. I like that you’re only like this for me.”
“Fuck, Jason,” Tim whines, his hands moving to grasp Jason’s hips. “You can’t just say shit like that!”
Jason lets his voice go as deep as he can manage when he replies, “Does this bother you, sweetheart?” He swears he can see the hairs on the back of Tim’s neck rise.
“It’s too much!” Tim cries out, his fingers digging into Jason’s skin. “I swear if you so much as brush a finger against my dick I’m going to cum right now.”
Jason preens. “What’s your refractory period?”
Tim blinks, and Jason moves back so he can clearly see the shock painting his boyfriend’s face. “I’m sorry?”
“If I make you cum right now, could you do it again? Within an hour, maybe?”
Tim gulps. “I don’t…I don’t know. I haven’t really tried before…”
“What do you wanna do? We can take a break for a minute, maybe move to the bedroom so you can recalibrate and I can suck you off, or you can cum in your boxers right now and I can try and make you do it again but in my mouth. If you have another idea, though, I’m all for it.”
“I…” Tim starts, before closing his mouth and pausing. Jason watches Tim’s eyes flit about the room and imagines the gears moving in his boyfriend’s head. “I don’t know. Can you decide for me? Please?”
And Jason, well. Jason won’t deny Tim when he asks so nicely like that. “I think I like the idea of you cumming in your pants for me like a teenager.” He trails his finger further and further up Tim’s thigh. “Would you like that?”
“I-” Tim swallows. “Yeah. I think so. Yeah.”
“Good,” Jason smirks, and lets his lips ghost over Tim’s, not quite kissing him. He wants to watch Tim come apart underneath him. Tim’s eyes flutter closed as Jason inches closer to Tim’s clothed cock, trying to keep himself from squirming–unfortunatley for Tim, he’s not doing a very good job of it.
Jason goes for it now, letting his fingers brush over Tim’s shaft, grazing over fabric. He moves his hand up and down a few times, and before he knows it, Tim’s hips are bucking and he’s moaning Jason’s name. His eyes are screwed shut, eyebrows furrowed in a way that Jason can’t help finding beautiful. Jason feels Tim’s cock pulsing under his touch, feels the fabric of Tim’s boxers dampening from orgasm.
It’s so fucking hot.
Jason strokes Tim through it, trying to focus on the sounds Tim is making rather than the way his gut is coiling.
Fuck.
How fucking screwed up is it, that he gets so turned on from his boyfriend cumming in his underwear that his uterus starts to attack him? Jason groans and buries his face into Tim’s neck, trying to breathe as slowly as he can.
Tim doesn’t notice first, still coming down from his orgasm, the world around them silent except for shaky breathing. Trying to ignore the pain in his pelvis, Jason wonders if he’ll get a bruise from how hard Tim’s fingers have been digging into his sides. Tim gripped onto his hips throughout the entire thing.
“Jay?” Tim breathes, his voice just above a whisper. Jason’s trying not to shake above him, but he’s not doing a very good job of it.
“Yeah?”
“Are you okay?”
Jason’s silent for a moment, a wave of shame crashing over his chest. This is supposed to be about Tim right now, but his body just had to go and have a flare up. He doesn’t want to move, doesn’t want to end Tim’s post-orgasmic bliss.
“Baby?” Tim asks again, his voice laced with worry.
“Hurts,” Jason admits, letting his body go limp against Tim’s. His voice is muffled in the heat of Tim’s neck.
“Oh baby,” Tim coos, rubbing Jason’s back. “How bad is it?”
“Not great. Sorry.”
Tim huffs. “Don’t apologize to me for something you can’t control. What can I do for you right now?”
Jason nuzzles his face against Tim’s warmth, as if he’s trying to bury himself in his boyfriend’s skin. “Stay here.” The pain is rising now, and Jason braces himself for the first bad wave. The twisting of his uterus, or whatever organ the universe is targeting, increases, and Jason feels his eyes welling with tears. It’s stupid, so, so stupid. He can take a batarang to his throat just fine, but is reduced to a whining mess at stupid cramps. They’re not even that bad. Most people can go to work with them, or workout, or do whatever daily activities they have just fine, but moving himself even an inch makes Jason keel over.
He bites the inside of his cheek, and a metallic taste begins to fill his mouth.
Double fuck.
It’s throbbing, persistent, and deep in his gut. Jason hasn’t been keeping track of the time, it’s too hard to count. He tries to regulate his breathing like he’s been told to, but the guilt of ruining this moment with Tim is too great.
Stupid. Fucking. Nervous system.
The circles Tim is drawing on his back are blissful compared to the cramping pain of Jason’s gut, but it’s not enough. Nothing ever is. He just has to wait it out.
It fades very slowly, but enough to the point where he can stop being some sort of dead fish flopped over Tim’s body. He sits up quickly, ignoring the dizzy sensation invading his skull.
“Babe?” Tim asks.
“Don’t talk,” Jason instructs. “I think I have forty-five seconds until the next wave. I’m going to carry you to the bedroom and then lay the fuck down.” He stands up, watching the seconds disappear in his head.
“Are you sure that’s a good-”
Jason shushes him, and scoops Tim up bridal style. Is it a good idea? Fuck no. Will it make the next round worse? Most definitely. But Jason is nothing but a stubborn man, and he’s going to carry his boyfriend to bed if he wants to goddamnit.
He walks quickly through his apartment, opening the door and all but tossing Tim onto his king size bed before flopping down head-first beside him.
It comes back worse.
Jason curls into himself, trying to hang on as he rides out the next wave. He feels the weight of the mattress shift as Tim gets up from beside him, but he can’t bring himself to look or move his head. The twisting sensation morphs into something akin to ripping, as if someone is playing tug-of-war with his intestines and slowly pulling them apart. Jason whines, clutching his stomach as if it’ll do anything to ease his agony. They’re starting to tear apart, pieces breaking off like an elastic band stretched too far. Jason is crying at his point, his body heaving as he soaks his pillow with tears.
Stupid, stupid, stupid!
Jason knows Tim struggles when it comes to comfort and emotions. In fact, he’s probably hiding away right now, waiting for Jason’s pain to subside. Jason doesn’t blame him, he wouldn’t want to see himself like this either if he were in Tim’s shoes.
Jason startles at the sound of footsteps returning to the room. There’s some sort of shuffling, and when Jason opens his eyes, he finds Tim kneeling on the floor near his side of the bed. He can’t really comprehend what his boyfriend is doing as he watches Tim untangle some sort of cord. Tim’s face is stoic and focused as he unravels it and plugs it into the outlet beside the bed.
Tim stands up, holding a soft, flat object in his hands. “Jason?” Tim asks, his voice low.
“Hmm?” Is the only sound Jason can manage in response.
“I have something for you. I think this will help you feel a little better. Can you lift your hand for me?”
Jason shakes his head in dissent and whines, as if to say: ‘No, hurts too much.’
Tim, despite Jason’s lack of verbiage, is quick on the uptake, “Okay. That’s okay. Hurts to talk right now, doesn’t it?” Somehow, Tim’s voice doesn’t add to the pain coiling in Jason’s gut. It’s soft–soothing, even.
Jason whimpers in confirmation.
“That’s okay, baby,” Tim murmurs, and Jason feels a hand brush against his scalp. It feels nice. Really, really nice. Jason finds the situation he’s in kind of ironic. He took care of Tim through his orgasm, and now Tim is taking care of him through this pain. He actually doesn’t mind. “I’m gonna help you, okay? I have a heating pad with me and it’s set to the highest temperature possible. I found it in your bathroom–Steph texted me and told me where it was. I’m gonna lift your arm and put it on your stomach, okay? It’s not gonna feel very good when I do, but you’ll feel better in a bit.”
Jason bites the inside of his cheeks and braces as Tim lifts his arm and something soft and warm presses up against his abdomen. Tim shifts it a little lower, to the space right between his stomach and the rounded mass of fatty tissue lying over the joint of his pelvic bone. Jason sighs at the warmth, his pain from the earlier movement fading away. It’s just enough to take off the edge, and the tide of his pain begins to recede ever so slightly.
Tim puts his hand back in Jason’s hair and sits on the edge of the bed, running his fingers through the soft locks. Jason lets out a sigh of content that’s embarrassingly close to a moan, causing Tim to chuckle.
“That feel good?”
“Mhmm…” Jason grumbles, both his breath and heart rate beginning to slow down.
“I’m glad,” Tim replies, and Jason looks up to find his boyfriend smiling down at him. There’s no hint of resentment or annoyance on Tim’s face, much to Jason’s relief–only compassion and some slight concern. “I got you something else,” Tim continues, and grabs something from the nightstand with his free hand. It’s a pill. “Can you take this for me?”
Jason huffs, finally finding his words. “Don’ wanna.”
“It’ll help,” Tim reassures him, but Jason isn’t having any of it.
“‘S fine.”
Tim sighs. “No, it’s not. And even if it really is fine, you taking this will help me feel better about doing everything I can to help you. Please can you take it? For me?”
Jason groans.
That stupid, little, manipulating twink…
He opens his mouth. Tim’s eyes glimmer from the sweetness of his success. “Thank you, baby.” Jason is gone. He is so, so gone for this twink of a man. Fucking hell.
Tim places the pill on Jason’s tongue and holds a glass of water to his lips. Jason swallows.
“Good boy.”
Jason whines. “Can’t be horny right now. Please.”
Tim’s eyes widen and he puts the glass of water back down. “Right. Sorry. Wasn’t thinking.”
Wasn’t thinking? God that makes it even worse. So much worse. Forget Tim being under him, because Tim being over him is so, so fucking hot. Jason would get down on his knees for this man.
His body, like the asshole it is, takes that as an opportunity to tug at Jason’s insides again, because apparently Jason isn’t allowed to have nice things. Jason shudders, his face scrunching up in a wince. Tim gets off the bed and goes to the other side before climbing back on to spoon Jason. Jason wriggles slightly, letting himself melt into Tim’s warm embrace. Tim slides a hand under Jason’s tank, running a finger down his spine.
“You’re so sweet to me,” he murmurs, trying to focus on Tim’s touch instead of the pain coiling inside his gut. Jason feels Tim kiss the nape of his neck, a soft brush against heated flesh. Tim hums into Jason’s skin.
“Of course, baby. You took care of me so well earlier.”
Tim’s words, of course, go straight to Jason’s cunt (again, because apparently Tim is incapable of not making Jason horny), and the twist grows tighter.
“You have to stop saying things like that,” Jason rasps. “Please.”
“I’m sorry,” Tim says for the second time, his voice sincere. “I’m not trying to rile you up, I swear.”
Jason groans. “I know. That’s what makes it even worse.”
“I can shut up if you’d like.”
“Please.”
So Tim does, silence filling the room. Jason focuses on his breathing, and moves the heating pad under his tank top so it makes direct contact with his skin. Tim continues caressing his back, lightly grazing his nails across Jason’s shoulders, neck, sides, and lower back. Jason feels his limbs turn to rubber under his boyfriend’s tender touch and lets his eyes flutter closed.
His mind drifts off as he feels Tim press soft kisses across his shoulders and explores Jason’s backside with his mouth and fingers. It’s intimate, with a startling lack of sexual charge.
Jason falls asleep feeling safe and loved.