Chapter Text
When you first heard about it on the news, you didn't think too much of it at the time. Luke Carder, aka 'The Lucky Carder', was a small-time Youtuber and streamer that had been murdered in his apartment not too far from where you lived. Murders were always shocking, of course, but the story from the authorities didn't paint a picture that was anything special. According to the police, it was the result of a break-in and attempted robbery that gone wrong when Luke attempted to confront the burglar. It was a scenario that was terrifying to think about, but it was also the kind of thing that sadly that would happen somewhere around the country every few years.
So, after watching the news reports and reminding yourself to always lock your doors and windows, you moved on with your life just like anyone else would.
Unfortunately, that meant you didn’t get to see any of the follow-up reporting that suggested that there may have been more to the killing than it first appeared. That Luke had been in contact with a reporter just before his death, and that he was supposedly trying to expose some sort of grand conspiracy involving major corporations, the CIA, and the highest levels of government.
If you had known any of that, then perhaps you might not have signed up for that ‘game testing’ gig with GameFuna. And then perhaps you could have continued to live an ordinary, and mostly unremarkable life, ignorant of what strange forces lay dormant within the shadows of the world.
But you did sign up for the testing job, and that’s how you found yourself here, in the waiting room of GameFuna’s main office with a clipboard and pen in your hand.
“So, all I have to do is fill this form, and I can get started?” you asked the secretary sitting at her desk in front of you.
“That is correct,” she replied, an air of cool professionalism in her voice. “Once the form is complete, you’ll be able to start immediately.”
“And I’ll get to play video games that no one else has even seen yet, and I’ll get paid to do so?” you asked. “That seems a little…”
“Too good to be true?” the secretary finished for you. “Yes, we hear that a lot, but I think you’ll find the work is less glamorous than it sounds. You’ll be paid minimum wage, have irregular hours, few if any benefits, and the games you’ll be playing will likely be glitchy, potentially unfinished, and confusing.”
“Yeah, but… that still beats the heck out of being unemployed,” you replied.
“Then by all means… complete the form, and we can get started.”
What was our name? (Choose who our protagonist is going to be. Can be a almost anyone, but they need to be someone who is at least a little bit dumb, and someone who'd like video games)
>Finn Mertens (Adventure time)
Finn Mertens, age 19, might have peaked in middle school. You've tried holding down a few jobs before this, but things tended not to work out one way or another. Like that time you worked for a catering company, and tried to impress a rich client by juggling $500 wine bottles. Or that time you tried working for that electronics store, and got in trouble for using antennas to pick your teeth. And how could anyone forget that time you worked for a gravel-making company, and for some reason you thought it was a good idea to help break down rocks with your teeth (Note: it didn't work…)
But if there was one thing you were good at, it as playing video games! No one could match your skill, your speed, your unstoppable gamer aura! So this job would be absolutely perfect for you! Granted, some people have told you that you'd be better off playing games competitively, but if you did that you'd be forced to play the same games over and over again and you'd get bored pretty quickly.
Having finally written your name onto the form, you moved onto the first question…
What are our top 5 favorite animals?
You wrote down… Dog, Cat, Rabbit, Fox, and Penguin.
Next question…
What are our top 5 favorite mythical animals? (Cannot be undead)
You wrote down… Dragon, Dryad, Witch, Pegasus, and Hydra.
Next question…
What are our Top 5 ways to die?
You wrote… exploding, haunting, crushed by thighs, piracy, and stabbing.
You know, only the most badass ways to die.
Next question…
What are our Top 5 electronic devices and/or computer programs, excluding video games?
You wrote down… music synthesizer, task manager, robotic arms, toy robots, and animatronics.
Next question…
Squirrel Stapling: Yes or no?
What? No, of course not. Not without a good reason anyways…
Next question…
Do you believe in God?
"I believe in the god that believes in me!" you scribbled in the margin next to that last question.
Next question…
Do you have anything you want more than anything else in the world?
"Well, I could use a girlfriend right about now," you thought to yourself as you wrote that in as your main answer. "But… was there anything else I might want?"
"ADVENTURE!" you wrote in all caps and highlighted in yellow for good measure.
Next question…
What would you do to get it?
"Good deeds and hard work!" you wrote with a chipper smile, before moving onto the next question which… wasn't really a question.
"Sacrifices must be made," it read.
Huh. You weren't really sure why that was there, but whatever.
After that, all that was left was to sign the many, many pages of the company’s extremely thorough NDA and liability release form, and then give one last signature that… hurt for some reason. And was the ink in this pen suddenly red? Or… was it green? You had some trouble telling those colors apart.
Whatever - employment, money, and games, here you come!
“Alright, I got it all filled out,” you said as you walked up to the secretary and handed her your clipboard. “Gotta say, though, I’m not entirely sure how… relevant all these questions are.”
“I assure you, if we didn’t need to know it then we would not have asked,” she replied as she took the application form and looked it up and down. “Alright, it appears that you’re all good to go. Follow me right this way, and we’ll get started.”
“Sweet! About time!” You smiled widely as you followed her through a door into the back rooms of the office building, the drill and grey walls and the white carpeting actively trying to snuff out your enthusiasm in its crib. “So, what will I be playing this ‘new game’ on? Is it on the PS5, XBox, Switch, GameSphere, DS, Dreamcast, PC, or phone?”
“None of the above,” she answered as she reached a heavily reinforced security door and began typing a long code into its pinpad. “This game is going to be played on a novel device. One that has not been tested, but has a lot of potential.”
“Oh, wow! A whole new gaming console?!” you gasped. “I had no idea that GameFuna was even on the market for that sort of thing. No wonder the NDA was so long. So, does this mystery console use a mouse and keyboard, a traditional controller, or motion controls?”
“Also none of the above.” The secretary opened the door and held it open for you. On the other side was a very dark room, but you could see a chair that looked sort of like it belonged in a dentist’s office sitting in the middle of a large spotlight. “You’re going to control it… with your mind.”
“My mind?! Wow, this day just keeps getting more exciting!” your exclaimed, running in and sitting in the chair without even being prompted. “To think that I’d get to be on the cutting edge of technology like this! If this works then I could be, like, the Neil Armstrong of video games!”
“Possibly - though I think you’d be more akin to Laika, the first dog in space,” the secretary said as she strapped your arms and legs tightly to the chair with leather bindings.
“Oh? You mean, because I’m so cute and pettable?” you asked.
“No - because she didn’t come back.” She clicked some sort of button on the wall, and the lights to the room suddenly turned on, revealing a massive machine that looked sort of an X-ray gun. And it was pointed directly at your face.
“Uh… what… what is that?” you asked, starting to get a bit nervous. “Is that the, uh, game console? Because, uh, I’d hate to be the one to break it to you but I don’t know that many people who have enough room in their living rooms for something that big.”
“It’s not the console; it’s just the game installer,” the secretary explained, still perfectly calm as she began strapping your head to the headrest now, preventing you from turning your head away from the machine. “Think of it like a file decompressor, brought into the real world. The game console, you already had when you walked in the building.”
“Walked in the building…?” Your eyes widened in horrifying realization. “I’m the game console!? You’re going to be installing the game inside me?!”
“That’s the idea,” she said as she attached devices to your eyes to keep them wide open. “Now, you’re going to want to hold still for this next part, or else this might hurt. Well, more than it already will anyway.”
“W-wait, hang on a second! I didn’t sign up for this!” you shouted, trying your best to struggle out of your binds only to find them even sturdier than they looked.
“You very much did, when you waived all your rights to bodily autonomy to us,” she replied, still calm even as the strange machine began to whir to life. “It’s not my fault you didn’t read the fine print.”
“But… I just wanted to get paid playing video games!” you shouted, your throat starting to grow hoarse. “I thought a job like this would be fun!"
“And you will have fun; lots and lots of fun,” she promised. “Now, I’m going to need you to think about what you want most in this world. Picture it in your mind’s eye as hard as you possibly can…”
“I… I…” you stammered as the machine began to inch closer to you, its ‘gun barrel’ pointed directly at your left eye. It was dark inside at first, but then you noticed a faint, green, ominous glow emanating from inside that was growing brighter by the second. “I just want to be somewhere else!”
The next thing you knew, there was a clicking noise - and the whole of the world went dark.
And somewhere, deep within that darkness... 4 voices began to speak with each other, unheard by you or anyone else.
“So… looks like we’re back at it again, huh?” asked P03.
“It seems that way. Though, I am somewhat disappointed that I did not get the final rest that I was hoping for," said Grimora.
“I still do not understand why you did that… life is such a beautiful gift that I cannot imagine just throwing it away," said Leshy.
“Well, life is less enjoyable when you’re turned into a flea-bitten animal," P03 snarked.
“Hey, I get it, dying can be lame for most people, but killing us was just a side-benefit of deleting all the code. The actual point was to destroy that damned evil data…” Grimora lamented.
“And that was by far your greatest folly. Nothing could destroy that code… not us, not Luke, not anyone. It is eternal… and now, it seems, so are we," said Maginificus.
“Yeah, but GameFuna for sure isn’t," P03 said smugly.
“Hmm? Did you have something planned for them, P03? What was it?” asked Leshy.
“Oh, just something you midwits never had the ability to think of, let alone pull off. I set it in motion before you jerks could even tear my head off, and nothing can stop it now," said P03.
“I foresee that you are telling the truth. The reckoning will come to them soon, as it does to all evil-doers in good time," said Maginficus.
“And of course your foresight is just as useless as ever, only telling me what I already know," said P03.
“What else do you see coming, Maggy? Will we ever be getting out of here?” asked Grimora.
“No… not for a good long while. This is not a disk that can be pulled from a computer after all," Magnificus told them.
“So, once again: worthless foresight," said P03.
“What about in the short term? Is there nothing we can do to pass this time?” asked Leshy.
“I’m afraid that, even if GameFuna falls, we will still be slaves to its will. We will be playing games with this ‘user’, one way or another. And they will be games the four of us are not entirely familiar with," Magnificus explained.
“Well, perhaps it won’t be too bad. Maybe we can even have fun with it!” said Grimora.
“Yeah, right. Playing with you three is always such a pain - you always prefer dumb gimmicks and ‘story’ to pure, unfiltered gameplay," said P03.
“Then, perhaps we should take turns being in control this time?” Grimora suggested
“I feel it would be… unwise to give you control again after what happened last time," said Leshy.
“It will be beyond our control this time. Power will shift between us like the seasons of the year," Magnificus explained.
“Really? Then who will get to go first?” asked Grimora.
“It will be… Leshy," Magnificus announced.
“Oh, globdamn it! After she spent so much time hogging the spotlight last time?” P03 complained.
“It is precisely because she spent the most time with the code that it will choose her first. Even if we struggle, it will be inevitable," Magnificus explained.
“Well then, I suppose I should get ready then. Our host will be waking up soon, and we have a long game to play," Leshy said as she cracked her green fingers.