Chapter Text
[Excerpt: Lexicon Arcanum, or the Unofficial Awakener Dictionary, Rules & Guidelines]
Under no circumstances must the existence of this work become known to Yuder Aile.
When he says Call me Yuder to the new recruits,
It means It doesn’t matter what you call me. You'll be crying for your mothers by the end of your first day of training anyway.
When he says You have made considerable progress.
It means You have made considerable progress. It would be a shame if you ruin it by growing too confident in your skills, now wouldn’t it? Don’t worry, I’ve specially devised a thirty-six-step training regime for you to make sure that will not come to pass.
When he says Apologies, my hand slipped.
It means I very intentionally caused that little mishap just now using my Awakener abilities to make you lose face, but if you dare disrespect my Commander or my comrades any further, I will make you lose much more than your face.
When he says If you value your life, you should flee while you still can.
It means If you value your life, you should flee while you still can. You are strongly advised to take this phrase and its equivalents very seriously.
When he says Oh?
It means I am giving you one last chance to stop bullshitting and tell the truth.
When he says Did you not promise to be nice to your assistant, Commander? in an oh-so-innocent voice,
It means I am up to no good and you are going to facilitate me.
When he says Did you not promise to be nice to your assistant, Commander? in a not-so-innocent voice,
It means You will fuck me until I can no longer walk or so help me.
When he says Kishiar and I weren’t particularly close in my past life.
It means Truly, we weren’t. Sure, he was my mentor and my superior, who personally chose me as his successor and taught me everything I needed to know in order to take over his position, and it just so happens that we slept together quite frequently, even risking high treason to do so, but beyond that, there was nothing between us. I only knew him for about two years and hardly ever spared him a thought after he died. Except the times when I did and had to drink monster poison so that I did not, and there was this one time when his face flashed before my eyes right before I died. But that was all there was to it, promise.
When he says I didn’t even get scratched.
It means I am completely incapable of telling a small nick on the finger from a gaping hole in the chest so you should probably do a thorough check-up just to be sure.
When he says Big brother… as a conversation starter,
It means Enon, I’m in deep shit.
When he says Where’s the Commander?
It means Enon, why must your face be the first thing I see after waking up from yet another self-inflicted near-death experience?
When he says Please, Akit.
It means Is this emotional blackmail? Yes. Am I sorry? No. But you will be if you don’t fold like a cheap suit right this instant, Commander.