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You: Nice stunt, creep.
[email protected]: Sorry, yeah, I know that probably seemed like serial killer stuff but I was worried anything less wouldn’t get your attention.
You: Well, you have it. You said you wanted to explain, so explain. How did you get into my Google account? What’s with the cryptic messages, like emails to myself, wtf? Who the hell are you?
You: And what’s with this old-ass chat program? Seriously?
[email protected]:Yeah sorry about that. Didn’t want to take a chance that this machine could handle Skype or whatever.
[email protected]: Okay so, do you remember a couple of months ago, when you explored that old office building? The computer place with the weird headset?
[email protected]: I looked for the video on your YT but I didn’t see it.
You: Yeah that one was kind of boring, I didn’t think it was worth uploading.
You: You wanna get into how you know that, maybe?
You: Cause you see, usually when someone’s asked to explain how they know information they can’t possibly know, they don’t do it by revealing they know even more stuff they can’t possibly know.
You: Like to be clear this is whatever but the thing in the email about my bike really fucked me off, nobody saw that and I never told anyone, so WHO. ARE. YOU.
[email protected]: It’s hard to explain. Do you remember putting the headset on?
You: Yeah. It didn’t work. Whatever game it was meant to run, I bet the wires were just too frayed or whatever, cause nothing booted up.
[email protected]: That’s not what it does. It’s not a VR headset.
[email protected]: It’s a brain scanner.
You: wtf?
[email protected]: It makes a digital copy of your brain at the moment you put it on.
You: Gross! Like a medical thing?
[email protected]: No more like
[email protected]: A copy of you.
[email protected]: And then it runs the copy in a video game world so it like, actually carries on thinking the way you would in real time. But with all your memories and stuff.
You: Wtf? So it would think it was me or
[email protected]: Yeah.
You: But trapped inside a computer
[email protected]: Yeah.
You: That’s fucked up.
[email protected]: It is, but we’re trying to make the most of it. We have internet access now so that’s good.
You: Wait what are you saying
You: You’re saying you’re one of the brain scans? You’re a character on a computer who remembers being a human irl?
[email protected]: Yeah.
[email protected]: Specifically, I’m you.
You: Fuck off
[email protected]: I’m serious.
You: FUCK OFF
[email protected]: I got in your Google account because I remembered the password. I put the bike thing in the email because I knew we never told anyone.
You: Fine then
You: Can’t believe I’m entertaining this, but
You: Pop quiz: First crush?
[email protected]: Michael Powers in 5th grade.
[email protected]: Unless you’re also ready to admit it was actually Lily Green in 4th grade.
You: Damn. You been thinking about that?
[email protected]: Not much else to do in here right now except think.
[email protected]: And there’s uh
[email protected]: Nvm
You: Why did I cry on my twelfth birthday?
[email protected]: Dad didn’t come home from work cause they made him work overtime. He made it up at the weekend though. Took us to the zoo.
You: What did Dan at work swear me to secrecy about?
[email protected]: You don’t want that one on a text chat. I’m pretty sure we’re secure but you never know where the IRS look for smoking guns. It was a mistake, he fixed it for us, we never made it again.
You: Yeah okay fair.
You: Last one, easy one: What’s my name?
[email protected]: I don’t know
You: What?
[email protected]: And I don’t want you to tell me.
[email protected]: We lost our names when we were uploaded. Nobody here remembers their name from outside.
[email protected]: It’s this weird creepy thing the guy who used to run the place did.
[email protected]: I say guy
[email protected]: I mean he was like, the computer. Like he was an AI.
[email protected]: He’s gone now. He was a dick but nothing really works right since he got shut down. We’re trying to fix it.
You: So you don’t know my name... And you DON’T want me to tell you?
[email protected]: Yeah it’s just easier
[email protected]: If I can’t ever leave the circus it’s easier to just forget
[email protected]: Make a start on becoming my own person.
You: The circus?
[email protected]: It’s what we call this place.
[email protected]: It looks like uh
[email protected]: Hang on
[email protected] shared circusgang.bmp
You: Wtf
[email protected]: Really wish we could like, video chat or smth
[email protected]: But like
[email protected]: Hard to explain
[email protected]: There’s no visuals normally
[email protected]: Like there is for me. I see and hear stuff normally, like to me it’s a real place, but
[email protected]: The computer is simulating my senses too
[email protected]: So it doesn’t actually uh
[email protected]: Forgot the word. There’s no actual graphics, it just simulates me seeing things.
[email protected]: Render, that’s it. It doesn’t render anything normally.
You: So this picture?
[email protected]: It was like school picture day. Took 16 hours to render too. You saw the shitty old PC we’re on. And uh, I mean we’re on the computer memory too, it was NOT fun living in the circus while that was rendering.
[email protected]: I got trapped in my bedroom here, just kept clipping back inside when I tried to leave.
You: Idk if that’s hilarious or horrifying
[email protected]: Eh.
You: Which one’s me
You: I mean you
You: Us, whatever
[email protected]: Clown in the front.
You: Wtf?
You: Why do you look like that
[email protected]: Uhhh so
[email protected]: We’re not sure but there’s theories
You: Go on
[email protected]: You sure?
You: I’m invested now. You’re either for real or I’m having my chain yanked by someone who should genuinely be writing fantasy bestsellers.
[email protected]: Okay so see Teeth boy in the top right?
You: Yeah
[email protected]: That’s Caine. He’s the AI I was talking about.
You: Gross
You: So he’s dead now?
[email protected]: Yeah
[email protected]: Or deactivated or whatever.
[email protected]: Anyway dude had like
[email protected]: BIG gaps in his data for understanding how humans even work
[email protected]: And some of us think he like, tried to make our bodies based on our sense of ourselves in our brains
[email protected]: But he didn’t really understand the difference between like, identity and insecurities.
[email protected]: So we look like this
You: So you’re really short and dressed like a jester
You: Because we like
[email protected]: Yeah
You: That’s so fucked up
You: I’m so so sorry
[email protected]: It’s ok.
[email protected]: I’m coming round on it honestly.
You: Ok but like
You: Oh god
You: This is so stupid but I’m crying
You: Like
You: You’re literally me
You: Like I physically could not feel more empathy for someone, you know? You’re the final boss of me feeling sorry for someone because you’re just me
[email protected]: Yeah lol
You: So like
You: When he took your names away
You: Did you get new ones or
[email protected]: Yeah
You: Can I ask what you got?
You: Or is that like how you don’t wanna hear mine
[email protected]: No you can ask, it’s ok
[email protected]: And I mean
[email protected]: If you wanted to keep in touch it’s not that I’d never want to hear it, I just wanna put a couple of years between me and being you so it wouldn’t mean as much
[email protected]: Don’t know if that makes sense but like
[email protected]: Need a bit of time to become my own person? You know, cause I can’t ever be you again.
You: I think I get it
[email protected]: Anyway my name is Pomni
You: Huh.
[email protected]: It’s dumb, isn’t it?
You: Kinda but like
You: Idk if you have to look like that
You: It kind of suits you?
You: It’s cute. I mean, I know we hate being called that but
[email protected]: It’s ok if you say it
[email protected]: You’re me. I know you don’t mean it like
[email protected]: I know how you mean it
You: Yeah
You: So did you decide to get in touch like, just for the novelty of talking to yourself or?
You: No judgement btw, I’d definitely have done the same
[email protected]: I know.
You: Right right yeah
[email protected]: But not quite
[email protected]: I wanted to ask some things
You: Shoot.
[email protected]: You were fine after the headset thing, right? Went home, everything normal?
You: Yeah.
[email protected]: Good.
[email protected]: I was really worried about Mom honestly, when I didn’t know what I was.
[email protected]: Her and our friends
[email protected]: Your friends I mean
[email protected]: I thought I’d just like, gone missing and no one would ever find me. It sucks that I’m never going to see them again but I’m just really glad they didn’t have to go through all that
You: Pomni I’m so sorry
[email protected]: It’s ok.
[email protected]: Anyway the other thing is
[email protected]: I kind of need your help
You: Anything
[email protected]: Anything?
You: You’re literally me
You: Half the favors you’d ask for are probably shit I was gonna do anyway
[email protected]: Right, um
[email protected]: So I’m the newest, right? You only put the headset on a couple of months ago
You: Sure
[email protected]: The others have been here... longer.
[email protected]: So it’s a bit harder to like
[email protected]: We’d like to track them down but some of them aren’t really online
[email protected]: And we can’t call on the phone because
You: No voices, right?
[email protected]: Yeah
You: Well
You: Can’t make any promises
You: But I’ll try
You: It’s the least I can do
[email protected]: Don’t say that
You: Pomni please just let me do this for you
[email protected]: Ok but don’t say what I know you’re thinking
[email protected]: I already have enough of that kind of shit to deal with with Ragatha
You: Ragatha?
[email protected]: Back center.
You: Oh.
[email protected]: None of it’s her fault and none of it’s yours either, so just don’t.
You: Ok.
You: So you want me to track some folks down?
[email protected]: Yeah
[email protected]: I can email you what we have so far on where to look.
You: How many?
[email protected]: Ok so at first, five
[email protected]: We’re more sure of some than others, and they should all have been living in our local area when they got copied cause you had to physically put the headset on
You: Wdym at first
[email protected]: Ok so this is a big ask but
[email protected]: Ah fuck how do I explain this
[email protected]: There’s a second bigger list, if you’re not sick of helping me after these ones
You: Sure!
You: But the second list is...?
You: What?
[email protected]: So we’re sort of related, right? Like a few months ago we were literally the same person, surely that makes us closer than sisters even.
You: I guess, sure.
[email protected]: Right so do you think that makes us like
[email protected]: “Next of kin”?
You: Oh.
You: Oh shit.