Archive of Our Own

1.

Eddie Diaz was one of those people who thrived on physical touch – a handshake, a hug, a gentle squeeze of the shoulder. People feeling down or in need of comfort he’s right there, always to bring the person in need to the other side.

He’s also a medic, a healer of some sort. He doesn’t just pull people from fires but keeps them alive long enough for actual doctors to get to them.

So, yes – Eddie Diaz thrived on physical touch.

But Eddie Diaz was also the type of guy who never fully allowed himself to actually seek that consoling touch for himself. The warmth of someone being there for him and not the other way around.

Maybe it was the way he was raised – to be the man of the house, a brother to his sisters, a husband to his wife, a dad to his son and a healing hand in the army. Even now as firefighter paramedic his touch heals and brings back to life but never in his lifetime he allowed himself to feel that touch back.

Not that it wasn’t allowed, it was just that the thought of fully letting himself seek that from another person was paralyzing at times. Because, what if that other person sees how clingy he can actually get? Or, how weak he is?

So, he was a cat.

Not in the physical or magical realism of it, but in spiritual.

A cat that was there to butt heads, heal with their purrs while making biscuits but would jump three feet in the air if someone tried doing that for them in return.

But also, that meant that he let himself stay close to people until eventually he feels safe enough to let them experience the full clingy Eddie Diaz experience. You know, the way the cat observes from a distance and rolls their eyes occasionally before climbing on top of you and claiming you as their new favourite person.

In the case of the humanlike Eddie Diaz the people in question knew to stay calm, not make any sudden movements or make a big deal that Eddie decided to pick them as someone trustworthy to accept comfort.

The first time it happened with Buck Eddie didn’t even realize that he was snuggling into his best friend until the day after it happened. Buck didn’t make a big deal out of it and just behaved like that was something they usually do. After that it happened so often that the initial embarrassment Eddie felt simply vanished out of the thin air.

And if the rest of the 118 ever noticed – and they absolutely did – they didn’t mention it.

_

‘’Man. I’m so tired,’’ Eddie drops on the couch next to Buck – probably too close but he doesn’t care. It’s not like the concept of personal space ever existed between them since the day they met.

‘’Wanna call it a night?’’ Buck asks nudging Eddie’s knee with his own.

Eddie tsks, inhaling deeply and melting into Buck’s side dropping his head on Buck’s shoulder.

‘’Nope. Just need a minute,’’ he snuggles closer letting his hand rest in the space on top of their thighs right next to Buck’s arm. Buck leans his own head on top of Eddie’s and just dials down the volume on the documentary they’re watching.

They just exist in space and time, TV humming slowly in the background. Eddie thinks David Attenborough is talking about a rare bird species but it’s all just a background noise at this time. Their bodies are warm next to each other and Eddie’s mind is finally out from the chaos of their shift.

Him and Hen were on back-to-back medic calls all day, mostly without firefighter support and each case was worse than the other. By the end of the shift he didn’t even know his own name, let alone what he was supposed to do. Chris was on one of his numerous sleepovers so Eddie – naturally – followed Buck home.

‘’Hey, wanna go to your room and sleep?’’ Buck murmurs into Eddie’s hair where he’s been dozing off for the past five minutes, blissfully floating in that liminal space between reality and dreams.

‘’Nope. Wanna sit here with you,’’ he mumbles then hooks his pinky finger with Buck’s and exhales again.

Buck chuckles. ‘’Okay, but if you fall asleep I’m carrying you to the room.’’

Eddie just happily hums and doesn’t let the pinky finger fall back from where they’re tangled. Buck reaches out with his other hand and starts gently scratching the entire length of Eddie’s forearm with his fingertips.

Eddie melts into the touch and just lets himself be.

2.

They were having mandated team building which Chim orchestrated then promptly bailed on when he realized that he organized it for his and Maddie’s anniversary. So, now – very pissed Hen was trying to follow Chim’s elaborate plan on the team building weekend and already plotted how to get back at him when this is all over.

It was barely noon on a random Saturday in September and they already finished their paintball session, pottery class and were enroute to the camp where they were supposed to build their tents and then check out some hiking trails with mountain guides.

It was busy. And chaotic.

Completely chaotic.

By the end of the day Johnson and Sanchez pushed fully clothed Jones in the lake – Jones, in retaliation plucked several nettle stalks and placed them in Johnson and Sanchez’s sleeping bags which resulted in really bad nettle burns on their shins when they tried slipping into them for a nap.

Ravi and Harry left to find wood for their bonfire and returned like they went to war all dishevelled and both of them refused to tell the actual story of what happened to them.

The rest of the A team wasn’t any better.

When the fire was finally out and all the food Chim specially catered for that night devoured everyone quietly retreated into their tents to sleep the day off.

Buck and Eddie gave Harry their own tent because Harry and Ravi couldn’t look at one another for even a second without blushing. Also, Buck and Eddie were completely okay with sharing the opened car bed of Buck’s new car in their sleeping bags. It was a warm evening.

Buck was already in the bed of the car, sleeping bag unzipped around his hips all snuggled in his soft grey hoodie looking at the sky when Eddie climbed over and sat criss-cross-apple-sauce next to him snack bags loudly rustling as he dropped them next to him. Buck glanced over and Eddie made an ‘oops’ face looking around if he woke anyone then looked back at Buck whose eyebrow was lifted in question.

‘’What? We might need snacks,’’ he says shrugging his shoulders.

‘’Snacks? Eddie, we ate a whole boar not an hour ago.’’

‘’I know, but these are sweets. They don’t count,’’ he shrugs again and chomps on a twizzler. Buck shakes his head fondly and smiles.

Eddie slides halfway into his sleeping bag, twizzler still in his mouth and leans on Buck’s chest looking at the sky.

‘’So, what did I miss?’’

Buck’s hand automatically finds Eddie’s hair and starts playing with it.

‘’Hm. Two shooting stars, a satellite and a whole lot of planes.’’

‘’Had any good wishes for those two?’’ Eddie asks jamming his hand into the twizzler package again. Buck snorts.

‘’Yeah, I think I got that covered.’’

‘’Care to share with the class?’’ Eddie teases.

Buck gasps. ‘’And what, jinxing them into not happening? No way! Nuh-huh!’’

Eddie props himself on his elbow, the candy still comically hanging from his lips and looks at Buck.

‘’You wouldn’t even tell me,’’ he points at himself mocking offense. ‘’Your best friend in the whole wide world?’’ He gasps again and Buck laughs.

‘’Rules are rules Edmundo.’’

‘’Ugh. Fine,’’ Eddie plops again on Buck’s chest and chews on his twizzler. ‘’But now I have to find at least three more stars in order to cancel your two.’’

Buck chuckles and pulls a bit on Eddie’s hair. Eddie just lifts his hand with twizzler in the air and Buck takes it wordlessly when a star shoots across the sky.

‘’Mine! That’s mine!’’ Eddie yells and there is a loud groan echoing around the camp.

‘’Sorry,’’ Eddie whispers but only Buck can hear him. ‘’Mine, that one’s mine.’’

Buck chuckles, his hand not leaving Eddie’s hair.

3.

‘’So, let me get this straight. You signed Buck and me for International Food Week at school and forgot to tell us about it? And the dish is due tomorrow?’’ Eddie asks pinching the bridge of his nose with his fingers.

Buck, Chris and Eddie are at South Bedford on a Sunday and it wasn’t even the noon when Chris dropped the bomb on them. Chris is in the armchair, reading Anna Karennina for his literary assignment and occasionally glancing at bewildered Buck and Eddie on the couch.

‘’Yeah. I mean, I told Pepa. She’s expecting you in two hours at her place,’’ Chris shrugs his shoulders then goes back to his book.

‘’You told… But you forgot,’’ Eddie stands up and starts pacing. Buck follows him with his eyes.

‘’Okay, but Chris what are we even making? We don’t have a plan or anything. How long have you known about this?’’ Buck decides to play the good cop while Eddie is actively throwing daggers at his lovely son, standing with hands on his hips and prepared to jump into the fight he already knows he’ll lose.

‘’Oh, Pepa has something in mind,’’ Chris simply says.

‘’She does?’’ Buck cautiously asks.

Chris rolls his eyes. ‘’All due respect Buck but Mexican dishes are far more diverse than, what – white people food from Hershey?’’

‘’Hey there, we invented chocolate!’’ Buck defends himself but he already knows he lost the fight the minute the words came out from his mouth.

The boy was correct.

‘’Actually, the cocoa plant was first harvested throughout Mesoamerica with the ancient Olmecs…’’ Chris sing songs flipping a page of his book with a smirk on his face.

‘’Ok, smarty pants,’’ Eddie interjects. ‘’So, we need to go to Pepa’s?’’

‘’Yeah. Just the two of you.’’

‘’And what if we had plans or, wait… Where are you going to be?’’

Chris looks around the living room and wiggles the book in his hands. ‘’Here, reading Anna Karennina. And I made sure you didn’t have any plans.’’

‘’Oh, so you did plan this?’’ Eddie points a finger at Chris and Chris just sighs closing the book in his lap with a finger jammed as a bookmark.

‘’You better get going, you know how Pepa hates when you’re late. And you need to pick up few ingredients,’’ Chris says flatly when Buck and Eddie look stunned at each other. Both of them open their mouth to say something but then Buck’s phone pings with a notification.

Eddie looks at him like his phone betrayed them but then Buck blushes showing off the text thread with Pepa.

‘’It’s… It’s a grocery list from Pepa. We really should be going.’’

‘’Told you so,’’ Chris chirps then opens the book back up again.

Both Buck and Eddie try to look annoyed but they are both chuckling by the time they get out the door.

_

Three hours later they are hip to hip at the kitchen counter preparing the ingredients for Chicken Tinga. Pepa is right next to them giving instructions to Buck who already asked fifteen questions in a row what exactly means ‘season until your ancestors tell you to stop’ and ‘it’s finished when it looks finished’. Eddie is silently grunting because the peeler won’t peel the way he needs him to peel and is seriously considering committing a murder over a rooted vegetable when Pepa goes to her yard to pick up some fresh herbs.

She decided that the dish was the best for reheating in school settings and that they could assemble the chicken with tortillas and sides directly on spot tomorrow.

She’s as always, correct.

Buck hip checks Eddie. ‘’You good?’’

‘’Yeah. I was just looking forward at quiet Sunday afternoon at the house, not this.’’

‘’Quiet Sunday afternoon?’’ Buck chuckles. ‘’When on Earth do you and Christopher have quiet Sunday afternoons? You usually blast aliens on the TV or play Mario Kart.’’

Eddie pouts. ‘’Hey, that’s quiet.’’

‘’Sure,’’ Buck smirks.

‘’Don’t be smug. Not everyone can be a master chef like you.’’

Buck leaves the knife on the board and turns to Eddie, faking offence. ‘’What? Me, a master chef? If you haven’t noticed I’m scared shitless I won’t recognize when the dish is done because Pepa keeps saying ‘it’s over until it’s over’ and ‘just a cup of flour’ but when I ask which cup she says ‘the blue one’. The blue one is not a measuring unit Eddie. I literally have no idea what I’m doing.’’

Eddie shrugs his shoulders then lifts a piece of carrot he just peeled to Buck’s mouth so he can snack on it. ‘’You’re doing fine. I’m on peeling duty. You’re on seasoning duty.’’

Buck chomps on the carrot like a petulant child and Eddie’s whole face lights up, his cheeks all rosy and smile so wide his canines could get an Oscar for the most brilliant smile in the world.

Buck sighs then kisses Eddie on the forehead. ‘’Fine, but if Mrs Patterson comments again on the lack of spices in it you’re taking the blame.’’

Buck returns to the pot willing it to start bubbling, feeling like he’s genuinely making a potion of some kind and not a meal out of it. Eddie chuckles and continues peeling the carrots, now completely glued from hip to shoulders next to Buck, his head resting on Buck’s shoulder while he peels the vegetables.

When Pepa comes with a bunch of herbs and gardening sheers in her hands she doesn’t comment on the boys leaning on each other nor the forehead kiss she witnessed from outside the window. She just drops the herbs in a colander next to them and turns on the faucet continuing to explain to Buck how to properly recognize each herb in the wild if he finds himself cooking outdoors.

‘’Please don’t give him ideas,’’ Eddie mumbles and Buck and Pepa chuckle.

_

The sun has already set when they finished everything. Eddie is carefully bringing the plastic containers to the car while Buck is finishing the dishes alongside Pepa who is drying them.

‘’I never really got to thank you Evancito,’’ Pepa starts.

‘’What for?’’ Buck asks sliding another plate to Pepa to dry it off.

‘’For taking care of my nieto,’’ Buck looks at her his cheeks slightly blushed but Pepa doesn’t let him answer just yet. ‘’You know, Edmundo was a very sensitive child. Still is, but he hides it. When Sophia was born I would find him in her crib all snuggled next to her holding her little hand and just looking at her like she was the greatest thing alive.

‘’And, you know what people say when babies are only few years apart – that you always need to watch over the toddler and the baby because the older one might get jealous and hurt the baby. Or, that they don’t know their strength and that they might unintentionally hurt the baby. But he was never like that.

‘’He would sneak into Sophia’s room at night, look at her for hours on end and then fall asleep next to her completely calm. Then, when Adriana was born he was basically her parent. He didn’t let her go out from his sight or his arms. Even now when they are together they are glued like Siamese triplets, always snuggling.

‘’And Helena and Ramon hate that. Hated it back then and hate it now. They have their own vision of what a man should look like and when Edmundo leans back into that soft side they turn into these vicious creatures.’’

Buck hums annoyingly, amping up the force with which he’s washing the dishes. Pepa sees that and narrows her eyes.

‘’Not a fan of Helena and Ramon?’’

‘’I know he’s your brother and everything Pepa but they took Chris and made Eddie and Shannon the bad guys. And that was not the first time they did it, so yeah. I’m not exactly their biggest fan.’’

‘’Good,’’ Pepa says taking another plate from Buck’s hands.

‘’Good?’’ Buck asks stunned looking at her. She just nods.

‘’Yes. Good. You two are good for each other. You bring him out from his shell and I don’t think he realizes that you’re doing it.’’

‘’I don’t know what you’re talking about,’’ Buck blushes then turns off the faucet. Pepa snorts.

‘’Ay, mi nino. You’ve known me for a decade, you know I love you both equally. And okay, I was a little concerned when he brought another gringo into our lives but you’re different. I didn’t even see Shannon bring him out like this.’’

Buck dries his hands and swallows a lump in his throat. ‘’Shannon wasn’t bad Pepa. They were both just so young at the time and neither Helena nor Ramon did anything to help their situation beside being willing to take Chris from their parents.

‘’So, please. Can we like let Shannon to rest, I think she deserves at least that after everything?’’ Buck pleads his ears trained to hear if Eddie is coming back. Pepa pats him on his hand.

‘’You are a good man Evan Buckley. And I stand by what I said, you two are perfect together.’’

‘’I, um… We’re not…’’ Buck starts but Pepa cocks her head.

‘’Don’t lie to me Evancito, I just gave you my secret family recipe,’’ she threatens him with her finger.

Buck scratches his neck. ‘’No, I’m not lying. We’re not together.’’

‘’Then, what’s with the hugs, kisses and all the cuddling?’’ Pepa lifts an eyebrow.

‘’It’s just platonic. We’re best friends. And,’’ he lifts his finger to stop Pepa from saying anything before him. ‘’You said it yourself; he’s a physical touch person but wouldn’t ask that by himself even if his life depends on it. So, I don’t make a big deal out of it. Neither does he. He needs comfort, I give it willingly. I need comfort, he’s there for me. We both need it, we’re there for each other.’’

Pepa lifts her eyebrows. ‘’Platonic kissing on the forehead?’’

‘’Yeah, platonically.’’

Pepa opens her mouth to say something but Eddie enters the kitchen all smiley. He envelops both Buck and Pepa around their shoulders in a tight hug.

‘’Ah, my two favourite people in the world!’’ He smacks a kiss on Pepa’s cheek.

‘’Don’t let Christopher hear you say…’’ Buck starts but is interrupted when Eddie places a fat kiss on his cheek. His eyes immediately find Pepa’s and Buck sees her smirking, trying to hold herself from not saying something she’ll regret.

She wouldn’t regret it.

Buck knows it.

Pepa knows it.

Eddie doesn’t know it.

Because Eddie is clueless.

Eddie doesn’t notice anything and fishes his phone from his pocket.

‘’Speaking of Christopher, what do you say we crash his little gaming session back home and ask him dozens of questions about Russian literature instead?’’ Eddie devilishly smiles when the phone connects with Christopher and he goes out from the room.

Buck and Pepa share another look but this time Pepa is not smirking, she’s looking at him fondly and for the first time in a long while Buck feels like someone is seeing right through him.

‘’He’ll get there. Soon.’’

Pepa says patting Buck on his cheek and this time Buck doesn’t object, he just nods and turns his head when Eddie jogs into the room taking him by the hand to drive back home, kissing Pepa goodbye.

4.

‘’What. Are. You. Doing?’’ Eddie asks holding grocery bags and leaning on Buck’s open patio doors with his shoulder.

Buck is star fished in the middle of his lawn, his eyes closed.

‘’Sunbathing,’’ he answers simply.

‘’Sunbathing?’’ Eddie asks again.

‘’Yup,’’ Buck sighs contentedly eyes still closed.

Eddie nods then takes off his jacket and leaves the bag on the table then lowers himself on the ground and rests his head on Buck’s thigh immediately closing his eyes too. Buck’s hand immediately finds Eddie’s chest and just stays there over his heart, grounded while Eddie breathes in and out.

‘’And what is it supposed to do?’’ Eddie whispers and Buck burst out laughing but still keeping his eyes closed.

‘’It’s supposed to be healing.’’

‘’Healing? Buck, we’re not Victorian children on our deathbeds in the need of a week by the seaside,’’ Eddie snorts but doesn’t move from his spot. He just places his own hand over Buck’s and tangles their fingers.

‘’Speak for yourself. I’m so pale people are mistaking me for tofu and halloumi.’’

Eddie giggles and hums out something that Buck doesn’t catch.

After fifteen minutes or so of complete silence Eddie turns his body towards Buck’s face and Buck immediately changes the placement of his hand on Eddie’s jaw and cheek, lightly brushing it absentmindedly with his thumb while his eyes still stay closed.

He can feel Eddie’s eyes on him but he decides to ignore it. They didn’t plan on meeting up today and if Eddie came by without calling first Buck knew that something was up, and asking about it before Eddie was ready to talk about it would just mess things up. He needed to let Eddie come to him instead.

And okay, he was really sunbathing in his backyard when Eddie came by – he wasn’t planning on it – but it seemed like a perfect set up for whatever was going on inside Eddie’s head.

He hears Eddie sigh and melt into Buck’s touch then snuggle closer to Buck’s belly instead. Even through the thin cotton of his shirt Buck can feel Eddie’s eyelashes fluttering then completely closing. He sneaks his other hand from where it was resting under his head to Eddie’s hair and slowly scratches his scalp while never stopping with his ministrations on Eddie’s jaw.

And Buck, honest to God hears Eddie purr as calm washes over him so he just smiles mentally thanking LeveledAmy135 on some random forum about grounding techniques and sunbathing.

5.

It was almost midnight when Buck received a text from Chris. He was just finishing his meal prep for the week because he promised himself that he’s not going to be ordering food for another week straight when he has a fully stocked fridge.

‘’So, not to be that guy but something is wrong with dad. Nothing bad but can you like call him or something?’’ The text read and Buck almost dropped the container of chia seed pudding he just prepared on the floor.

‘’What do you mean?’’ He responds back immediately.

‘’We had facetime with abuelo and grandma today and they said some things. He was okay during the dinner but I can hear him rolling in his bed and it’s annoying. I tried talking to him but he keeps saying that he’s fine.’’

‘’Oh boy.’’

‘’Yeah.’’

‘’Okay. Will be there in fifteen minutes bud. I’ll use my key, go back to sleep.’’

‘’Thank you, Buck.’’

‘’❤️’’

He haphazardly stuffs the already forgotten chia seed pudding in the fridge and takes the car keys from the bowl, ignoring the fact that he’s in his worn-out sleeping T-shirt and half torn grey joggers which he never wanted to throw out.

‘’I’m coming over and I don’t take no for an answer. I’ll let myself in when I get there.’’

He sends out a quick text to Eddie.

Buck sees the little ‘seen’ under the message but bubbles don’t appear. He knows it’s nothing out of the ordinary so he just drives over to the Diaz household murmuring all the insults he could name in the fifteen-minute drive about Helena and Ramon under his breath.

When he lets himself in he stops by Chris’s room first and gives off a silent wave to the boy all snuggled in his bed with his headphones on. Buck knows that he should probably say something about Chris staying up so late when tomorrow is a school day but he opts out of it trusting Chris that he won’t overwork it. He then tiptoes to Eddie’s room and silently closes the door behind him.

Eddie is underneath the mountain of blankets but one of his socked feet is out from the containment.

He’s not sleeping.

Buck is aware that Eddie is not sleeping.

Eddie is aware that he’s pretending to be asleep.

But neither of them wants to acknowledge it.

Buck sighs then goes to the foot of the bed and takes Eddie’s big toe between his fingers and moves it around as to wake him up.

Eddie still fakes it.

Buck snorts. ‘’Fine, we’ll do this your way.’’ He then takes the tip of the sock and slides it all the way from Eddie’s foot in one swift motion that it earns a grumble from Eddie.

‘’You’re mean,’’ he mumbles from underneath the blanket mountain.

Buck sits on the foot of the bed and holds Eddie’s ankle in his warm hand. He can feel his pulse underneath his thumb and just sits there in the quiet until he feels Eddie’s heartbeat slow down as he gives in the other socked foot to Buck.

Buck snorts again. ‘’You’re ridiculous.’’

Eddie hums while Buck takes off his other sock then proceeds in taking off all the blankets from Eddie one by one. Eddie doesn’t fight it, he just lays there completely surrendering to whatever Buck had in mind and when Buck climbs completely on top of him like a weighted human blanket he lets out a little ‘oof’ then melts into the mattress.

Buck’s cheek is between his shoulder blades and he just lets Eddie completely relax.

‘’I hope you’re aware that you need to make pancakes for my traitor son in the morning.’’

‘’Is that so?’’ Buck says dropping a featherlight kiss between Eddie’s shoulder blades and Eddie finally exhales.

‘’Mhm, I think he did this on purpose.’’

‘’He orchestrated your awful parents to troll you with comments so I can come over and make him pancakes in the morning?’’ Buck muses sneaking his hands underneath Eddie’s body and completely hugging him like an octopus.

‘’Ugh, when you say it like that,’’ Eddie grumbles then moves his head a bit so he can look at Buck over his shoulder.

‘’That can’t be good for your knee Buckley.’’

‘’I’m fine,’’ Buck lies through his teeth because his knee is in fact in the wrong position and is actively hurting. Eddie snorts turning in Buck’s hold and flipping him on the back.

‘’Liar,’’ he says again then takes one of the dropped blankets and covers both of them then snuggles on Buck’s chest, tangling their legs and happily humming.

Buck leans his head on top of Eddie’s and holds him tighter while yawning.

‘’Night Eddie.’’

‘’Night Buck.’’

+1

Eddie didn’t know that you can be equally exhausted and so wired up that he thought he could buzz out from his skin. And it wasn’t anything in particular.

Christopher was at school. Buck was on shift and he was just cleared from his doctor that the electric shock he suffered the other day on the call, the very minor electric shock he suffered – it was barely anything other than faulty wiring really – has checked out.

He wanted to go back to work but Buck wouldn’t let him before he was fully cleared.

He wanted to watch over Theo in his down time but Buck glared at him like he borderline wanted to either put an airtag on Eddie or a baby monitor in the living room so he could have eyes on him at all times let alone let him take care of his overly enthusiastic hyperactive ADHD boy.

So, Theo was at Pepa’s for a few more hours until Buck comes back from his half day shift and Eddie doesn’t know what to do with himself.

He’s bored out of his mind but also exhausted because he would never admit to Buck that for a second  the other day he really freaked out when the shock hit him. He had trouble sleeping even though Buck offered to stay over with Theo a couple of times.

But he didn’t want to disturb Theo’s routine that Buck worked really hard on perfecting on and the fact that Chris’s school was a smidge closer from South Bedford than Buck’s place. It was completely normal that both of them sleep in their own houses.

They were adults with separate lives, right?

Ugh, we really need to live together.

Eddie thinks letting his head fall on the backdrop of the couch then catches himself.

Yeah Edmundo, it’s totally platonic to want to live with your best friend for the rest of your life. Just keep kidding yourself.

But he wants that so badly, and it would make everyone’s lives so much easier. Neither Carla nor Pepa need to jump between two houses for Chris and Theo. The school bus can take them from the same place. They already have stocked fridges and pantries for both of their son’s preferences. It would be way easier to just consolidate.

Also, Eddie missed Theo like crazy.

Which was an odd thing to say or even think about since Theo has been in their lives less than three months at this point.

But Eddie adored his little buckling.

He also loved that he was one of the few adults that would calm Theo in a heartbeat – the other one being Maddie of course. Both Maddie and Eddie teased Buck that the only reason why Theo listens to them was the fact that they both had to endure an older Buck and that his gene pool already recognizes his safe people.

But now, in his spare time he couldn’t even spend time with his buckling when his big Buck was working. He called and texted Pepa to see if he can visit them but she didn’t answer any of his calls.

He wasn’t concerned because he knew that Theo’s favourite time of the day was getting his hands dirty while working in the garden with Pepa.

Which meant that all his intrusive thoughts he kept under the radar when he was surrounded by his favourite people came back to surface.

Helena nagging him about changing the will and naming them as Christopher’s legal guardians since he keeps getting in trouble during calls.

Cursed be the day he mentioned that they’re not in it. Actually, no. He’s glad that they finally know Buck is the one who gets legal custody over Christopher but his brain has been supplying him with more concrete answers these days on why he actually did what he did all those years ago and he’s trying really hard not to yell everything in his mother’s face over facetime because she’ll walk all the way from El Paso to kill him.

So, that’s the other thing he’s trying not to think about right now. Being in love with Buck.

There’s also the ‘Chris looking into colleges’ thing he’s been trying to only approach from a logical and helpful dad standpoint and not an overemotional mess he actually was.

So yeah, he’s buzzing and he needs to be unbuzzed or his heart rate will go through the roof.

He stands up from the couch then sits down again.

He paces few times around the room. Turns on then off the TV but nothing is holding his attention.

He goes to the fridge and sees all the food containers Buck meal prepped for the next few days so that he doesn’t need to cook and his heart skips a beat again.

He closes the fridge, opens it then closes it again.

He changes the sheets on his and Chris’s bed even though he changed them two days ago and is halfway through rummaging through his cleaning supplies for his window cleaning stuff when someone rings his doorbell.

He almost skips to the door welcoming whichever intruder decided to knock on his door. Hell, he’ll even welcome a talk with Mormons or an encyclopaedia salesman.

That’s how buzzed and bored he was.

But when he opens the door it’s to Pepa’s bright face and Theo barrelling into his legs.

‘’Teddy!’’ Theo yells smashing his little face between Eddie’s knees.

Eddie huffs out a laugh and drops his hand on top of the boy’s head then looks back at Pepa who rolls her eyes.

‘’Theo wanted his Teddy,’’ she says simply as Eddie opens the door wider for Pepa to enter and tries to scoop Theo up from where he’s snuggled between his knees but Theo is giggling and holding firmly on to him so they just waddle like penguins to the living room.

‘’You missed me buddy?’’ Eddie asks his heart expanding in his chest.

‘’He told me that his Teddy needs him,’’ Pepa answers instead leaving Theo’s backpack on the coffee table lifting her eyebrows.

Eddie blushes. ‘’Um, wha…’’

But Pepa lifts her hand to shut him up. ‘’He’s Buck’s son mijo, what did you expect? He’s telepathically connected to you. So, if Theo says his Teddy needs him, I bring Theo to his Teddy.’’

‘’That easy?’’ Eddie lifts his eyebrow. ‘’But when I begged both you and Buck to let me watch him because I was cleared from the doctor you wouldn’t let me do it.’’

‘’We wanted you to rest. We didn’t know you’d drive yourself crazy.’’

‘’I’m not driving myself…’’

But Pepa again lifts her eyebrows as to challenge Eddie.

‘’Fine, I was driving myself crazy.’’

At that Theo lifts his face at Eddie with a bright smile plastered all over it, Buck’s dimples staring at him from his buckling.

God damn it, Buckley.

‘’Okay, my mission is complete. I need to go to my pottery class now,’’ Pepa claps her hands together and spreads her arms as Theo runs to hug her goodbye. She plants a quick peck on Eddie’s cheek then whispers something to Theo where he holds her hand while walking her out the door.

Eddie is transfixed when Theo pushes the door behind Pepa then turns around like his very identical older counterpart and puts his small hands on his hips.

That one Theo got from Eddie, and Eddie will forever hold it over Buck’s head.

‘’Sit,’’ he orders with his small voice and Eddie wants to say something back but there isn’t a universe in which Eddie Diaz wouldn’t fold immediately by any Buckley order so he salutes instead.

‘’Sir, yes sir!’’

He sits on the couch and in a heartbeat Theo takes off his shoes then climbs over the couch cushions and places himself over Eddie’s chest, all starfished.

For a second Eddie is confused. Not that this isn’t something that they usually do but they get into this position only after Theo runs a marathon in the backyard and when the only thing that calms him into a nap are Eddie’s soothing stories and a cuddle.

But this time Theo wasn’t being hyperactive nor looking like he wants to nap, he just plopped on Eddie like that’s his right.

Which, as he is a Buckley after all it genuinely is his right.

‘’You okay there bud?’’ Eddie asks soothingly going over Theo’s back with his hand.

‘’I’m fine. You’re not fine.’’

Eddie stills.

‘’What… What do you mean?’’

‘’You’re going crazy.’’

‘’Who taught you that word?’’ Eddie asks puzzled when Theo giggles.

‘’Buck told Pepa this morning. I remembered it.’’

‘’Well, when Buck gets home we’re going to have a word about that,’’ Eddie teases but Theo props his little chin on Eddie’s chest and looks up at him.

Like, really looks at him.

Or through him.

Either way Eddie wants to cry a little bit and he doesn’t even know why.

Theo takes a deep breath, scrunches his eyebrows like he’s thinking about something then smushes his cheek back at Eddie’s chest again.

‘’You need this. I’m not going anywhere.’’

Then he pats Eddie’s chest and sides where he’s lying on top of him.

And Eddie wants to cry so he just hugs the boy back and they don’t move a muscle for the next few hours. Eddie peeks every now and again and sees that Theo is not sleeping, he’s smoothing out Eddie’s sides of his worn-out T-shirt he’s been wearing and Eddie immediately recognizes it as one of the ADHD stimming techniques.

Buck does it too with this exact T-shirt because he likes the softness of it.

And after a while Eddie realizes that he’s not buzzing anymore.

His mind is not reeling.

His mother and her comments are long forgotten.

The dull pang of Christopher’s college idea is still there but in a proud dad kind of way now.

And he feels like all the times Buck let him do whatever he needs to do with hugs and snuggling without questions asked.

Hm, and Ravi and May teased him that he’s the Buck and buckling whisperer when it was the other way around too. The Buckling had the same power to ground Eddie like Buck did.

And isn’t that wonderful.

Eddie doesn’t even notice Buck quietly slipping into the house and sneaking up on them behind the couch. He doesn’t even flinch when Buck crouches in front of them and kisses Theo’s shoulder.

‘’All good there buddy?’’ He asks eyes darting from Theo to Eddie sitting in complete silence for God knows how long.

‘’Mhm, Teddy’s heart now beats normal again. I healed him.’’

Theo lifts his head, now flattened out completely on one side with a smile on his lips when he stretches his little body.

‘’Oh, did you now?’’ Buck asks smiling locking eyes with Eddie whose eyes are swelling with unshed tears.

‘’Yes, now he’s all yours because I want to finish the puzzle Chris left me. B-y-e!’’ He says offhandedly as smacks a kiss to Buck’s knee while climbing down from Eddie and running to Christopher’s room.

Buck and Eddie snort at the same time.

‘’How long have you been sitting there?’’ Buck asks fully sitting on the floor by the couch and letting his head fall on Eddie’s knee. He yawns as Eddie runs his hand through his curls.

‘’Since Pepa dropped him off. He said that you said I was going crazy.’’

‘’I did not!’’ Buck flinches his head towards Eddie but Eddie is grinning, his hand still in Buck’s curls.

‘’Bad shift?’’

‘’We were on calls since this morning. An eight-hour shift felt like a 72 one. I’m wiped.’’

‘’Go, take a nap. We have at least two hours until Chris comes home and all hell breaks loose.’’

Buck shakes his head on Eddie’s knee. ‘’Nope, I’m comfortable here.’’

‘’Come on Buckley, don’t make me beg.’’

At that Buck jerks his head at Eddie with an evil grin on his face. Eddie points a finger at him.

‘’Nope. Nope. Don’t do that.’’

‘’But Eddieeeeeeee!’’ Buck pouts as he climbs on to the couch and lands his head in Eddie’s lap with his legs dangling over the armrests. Eddie takes one of the decorative pillows and smashes Buck’s face with it.

‘’You’re insufferable.’’

Buck bats out the pillow and lifts a finger. ‘’Or adorable, hm?’’

‘’You can be both things at once,’’ Eddie whispers and digs his hand again into Buck’s curls again. Buck’s blue eyes trained on him, soft blush creeping in on his features.

Soon, Eddie thinks to himself and sees the minute his thought connects with Buck’s remaining brain cells because Buck pulls on a little smile then sighs and cuddles up into Eddie’s belly taking other Eddie’s hand and putting it over his eyes to shield him from the daylight creeping from the windows.

‘’Fifteen-minute nap then I’m making snacks,’’ he says all snuggled while Eddie gently moves his thumb over Buck’s eyebrows in soothing motion.

‘’Mhm, fifteen minutes,’’ he whispers as he feels Buck completely relax and fall asleep.