Chapter Text
The pain was everywhere.
It burned through his neck, his chest, his veins. It crawled beneath his skin like living fire. Severus Snape tried to breathe, but each breath felt thinner than the last. His vision blurred. Above him loomed a ruined ceiling, broken beams, dust drifting through shafts of pale light.
A wet rattling sound escaped his throat, wound from Nagini`s fangs made it difficult to breathe.
Green eyes stared into his own, desperate and horrified.
Lily's eyes.
Severus tried to speak. He wasn't sure whether he wanted to tell the boy something important or simply look at those eyes a moment longer. The memories flowed from him instead, silvery strands spilling from his mind.
The cold was spreading through his body. The pain was beginning to fade.
Finally darkness swallowed him whole.
***
His body jolted violently across a wooden floor.
"Move, you idiot!"
The voice was familiar.
Pain exploded through Severus' shoulder as someone yanked him backward.
His eyes flew open. For one disoriented moment he thought he was still dying. Then a terrible growl echoed through the room. A massive wolf-like creature lunged across the room trying to bite him, but Severus could not move.
A hand yanked him back towards the exit.
"Are you trying to get yourself killed?!"
Severus stared at extremely young James Potter, but he didn`t give him enough time to think. Potter practically threw him toward the tunnel entrance. Severus stumbled forward, his legs unfamiliar and far too short.
The werewolf lunged.
Severus barely managed to dodge. Claws sliced through the air where his throat had been a heartbeat earlier.
Potter shoved him again.
"Move!"
The command snapped him out of his shock and they ran. Behind them came snarls, scraping claws, and the deafening crash of furniture being destroyed.
Suddenly something slammed into his back and he hit the ground hard.
Pain shot through his right leg, and Severus looked back at the werewolf`s claw that caught him. Potter seized the back of his robes and practically hauled him into the tunnel.
The werewolf's jaws snapped shut inches from Severus' foot.
Then they were falling down the passage, the sounds of the beast faded behind them.
For several seconds neither spoke. They simply lay there in the darkness, gasping for breath.
Finally Potter looked at Severus.
"Did he bite you?"
Severus looked down at his leg. He rolled up his pants and his gaze fell on four long claw marks that crossed it. Blood trickled between his fingers.
Potter followed his gaze and visibly relaxed.
"Just claws."
The sheer audacity of Potter made Severus want to hex him.
Potter hauled him upright again.
"Come on, we need to get you to infirmary."
Severus dropped Potter`s hand from his shoulder, but a sharp pain shot through his leg and he almost fell if it weren't for another boy.
"Do you always have to be such a pain in the ass? I'm helping you," James muttered and dragged him out of the tunnel.
Snape's mind was racing with questions - what was he doing here? Why was James Potter alive? Severus took a closer look at the boy that was dragging him towards Hogwarts, thinking he was having a near-death hallucination. But no. It wasn't Harry. Harry was shorter, his hair was longer. And he had green eyes.
The realization sat heavily in his stomach during the entire walk to the hospital wing.
Young Madam Pomfrey nearly exploded when they arrived.
"What happened?"
"Accident," Potter said immediately.
"Accident?" she repeated sharply.
"Very unfortunate accident."
"Mr. Potter."
"Very, very unfortunate."
Madam Pomfrey looked as though she wanted to strangle him. Instead she pointed toward a bed.
"Sit."
Severus obeyed.
His mind still felt disconnected from reality.
Pomfrey took one look at his leg and began applying healing salves.
The werewolf's claws didn't have time to dig deep into the skin, but because it was a magical wound, they would take a long time to heal.
The doors of the hospital wing opened again and a familiar figure entered. Albus Dumbledore looked almost the same as the last time Severus saw him.
Dumbledore's gaze swept across the room. First to Potter. Then to Severus. Finally, it dropped to the heavily bandaged leg. The old wizard's expression became grave.
"Mr. Potter," he said quietly. "Thank you. I believe I shall take over from here."
Potter hesitated, nervously looking between Dumbledore and Snape, but then nodded.
"Good night, Professor."
As he turned to leave, his eyes briefly met Severus's.
Silence settled over the room.
Dumbledore pulled up a chair beside the bed. For several long moments Dumbledore simply watched him. The silence stretched until Madam Pomfrey finally huffed and marched away to give them privacy.
In his first life, he had spent years trying to understand the old man. In the end, he still wasn't entirely certain whether Albus Dumbledore had been a genius, a manipulator, or simply a man doing his best while making terrible mistakes.
Perhaps all three.
"Mr. Snape," Dumbledore began gently, "I imagine you have many questions."
Severus certainly did. Most of them involved the wisdom of allowing a werewolf access to a school full of children. But he kept his mouth shut.
The last time he had found himself in this conversation, he had been fifteen years old, furious, frightened, and eager to argue.
The result had been a magical vow wrapped around his throat.
This time, he knew better.
"Perhaps a few," he said.
"Then I shall explain what I can." the Headmaster folded his hands. "The creature you encountered tonight was indeed a werewolf."
Severus resisted the urge to roll his eyes. What an astonishing revelation.
"I see."
"As you already deduced it yourself, it is Remus Lupin. Remus was bitten as a child and has lived with this condition for many years. He is not responsible for the actions of the wolf," Dumbledore said, "He bears no malice, Severus. During the full moon, he is entirely without a mind."
When Severus only responded with silence, he continued to justify his student.
"Mr. Lupin is not a dangerous young man. You just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time."
That statement sounded ridiculous after tonight. Remus Lupin might have been a good person. A kind person, loyal friend.
Unfortunately, a transformed werewolf was still a transformed werewolf. They tended not to pause and discuss moral philosophy before tearing someone apart.
Fortunately, decades of experience dealing with politicians, Death Eaters, and stubborn Ministry officials had taught Severus the value of strategic silence.
He merely nodded.
"Tonight's incident occurred only because Mr. Black made an exceptionally poor decision. I have spoken with him and he assured me that he did not intend for you to be harmed."
That was the point where Severus nearly lost control of his temper. He could feel the familiar anger stirring in his chest.
He took a slow breath and reminded himself how the Marauders' lives ultimately turned out.
James Potter would die at twenty-one.
Sirius Black would spend over a decade in Azkaban before dying in another war.
Remus Lupin would live in poverty and ostracism before dying himself.
Peter Pettigrew would live his life as a rat and die as a rat.
This thought lay like a soothing balm on his soul.
"Ofcourse, he did not intend harm," Severus repeated calmly. "He merely directed me toward a transformed werewolf."
Dumbledore sighted. "I will not defend Mr. Black's actions. What he did was reckless, foolish, and dangerous. And he will bear the punishment for his actions." Dumbledore continued, "However, I hope you understand the consequences if Mr. Lupin's condition becomes public knowledge."
Severus already knew exactly where this was heading. In his previous life, Dumbledore had maneuvered him into a magical vow. This time Severus had no intention to take any ballast.
"I do understand.” Severus looked up, words came to him with difficulty. "Remus Lupin did not choose to become a werewolf. He did not attack me because he wanted to, so I do not hold a grudge against him."
"I am grateful for your understanding," finally Dumbledore relaxed.
"And I have no intention of discussing Lupin's condition with anyone, so there is no need for him to worry," Severus smiled, “I know when to keep a secret.”
"I am pleased to hear it." Dumbledore returned a smile and rose from his chair. "Thank you, Severus."
"Good night, Professor."
"Good night."
Dumbledore departed, the doors closed softly behind him. The moment he was gone, Severus let out a long breath of relief. He dropped back onto the pillows, staring blankly up at the stone arches of the ceiling.
Remus Lupin’s furry little secret was a drop in the ocean compared to the knowledge of the future that he possessed.
He was back in 1975. Lily was alive. The Dark Mark did not stain his arm. He could change it all.
The thought kept him awake until dawn.
By breakfast the next morning, Severus had made a decision.
He would never become a Death Eater. Neither he would ever become Dumbledore's obedient soldier.
Severus Snape was tired of having an owner.
The first problem was money.
Money had controlled far too much of his first life. Poverty had dictated his choices and limited his opportunities. This time he intended to fix that.
The answer arrived halfway through his porridge.
Potions.
Severus nearly dropped his spoon.
Of course! A lot of potions would not be invented for years! The first thing that came to mind, considering the events of the previous night, was Wolfsbane potion. Damocles Belby would become famous for it in 1984. Rich, too.
But at this moment nobody knew it existed.
A slow smile spread across Severus's face.
The potion was difficult. And extremely expensive. The ingredients alone cost an arm and a leg, to say nothing of the exorbitant patent application fees levied by the Ministry. But if he could secure the capital, patent the recipe, and establish the intellectual property under his own name, he would have a steady income every month.
Severus couldn't help but smile at the prospects that opened up before him.
“Madam Pomfrey, can I visit Severus? I’ll only be there for five minutes!”
The voice shattered his train of thought, causing him to sit bolt upright.
For a brief, ridiculous moment, he thought he was imagining it. He had heard that voice in dreams for nearly twenty years. His heart hammered violently against his ribs, a sudden spike of adrenaline making his breath hitch.
He frantically ran a hand through his hair, only to immediately curse himself. It was stringy and unwashed. Of course it was.
“Sev!”
The curtain around his bed was pulled aside and Lily Evans stepped through with a bright smile. The sight of her stole every prepared thought from his mind.
Sunlight streamed through the tall hospital wing windows and caught in her red hair, turning it into a halo of copper and gold. She looked exactly as he remembered and completely different at the same time.
“I’m only allowed three minutes,” Lily announced as she sat down beside his bed. “Apparently my presence could worsen your condition. So you have around two minutes and thirty eight seconds explaining what happened to you.”
Severus simply stared. His throat felt as dry as a desert.
“Sev?”
He swallowed. The last time he had seen her, she had been dead on the floor of her house. The memory hit him with such force that for a moment he couldn't breathe.
“Sev, are you still feeling unwell?” Lily asked, leaning forward. Her green eyes narrowed with concern. “Should I come back later?”
“No, stay!” he grabbed her hand, but after a second he let go, startled by his own reaction. Looking away to collect his thoughts, he added, “It’s not a serious injury, so don’t worry.”
Lily's eyebrows shot upward.
“Madam Pomfrey wouldn't even let me in here for five minutes, and you're telling me it's not that serious?”
“Pomfrey tends to be dramatic,” Severus said, trying to sound normal.
“Was it Potter and Black?” suddenly asked Lily.
Severus froze.
“Lily…”
“Just tell me the truth.”
“There is nothing a good potion cannot cure,” he said carefully, forcing a smile. “I’ll be walking as good as new tomorrow.”
“So it’s something to do with your leg,” Lily said thoughtfully.
Her gaze drifted toward the blanket covering his lower body, as though she could somehow spot the injury through the fabric.
“You know I’m a prefect, right? I can take points from them.”
“You’d sacrifice a Gryffindor victory for me?” Severus asked sarcastically.
“Pfft! What victory?” Lily folded her arms across her chest. “Those idiots have us in last place among the houses! The points I take away won't make much difference.”
Despite himself, Severus laughed. “Thank you. Your concern is deeply touching.”
“There you are. I was starting to worry that the injury had caused permanent personality changes,” Lily teased him and grinned.
“Miss Evans, classes will start soon,” Madam Pomfrey called in a warning tone from across the ward.
“Right!” Lily jumped to her feet. “I’ll come see you after class. Get well, Sev!”
She waved and hurried out of the hospital wing.
The smile never left Severus’s face, even while Madam Pomfrey forced him to drink another vile healing potion.
***
He was released from the hospital wing the following day, after spending nearly an hour trying to convince Madam Pomfrey that he was not dying and was perfectly capable of walking to his dormitory on his own.
Too many thoughts were racing through his head. The future seemed both distant and painfully close at once. He wanted nothing more than to retreat to his bed and write down his plans before they slipped away.
- Patent the Wolfsbane Potion through the Ministry and submit it to the Potioneers' Guild.
- Find the Dark Lord's Horcruxes and destroy them.
- Keep Lily away from Potter.
Severus looked at the short list and frowned. Certainly, brevity was the soul of wit, but this was still too short to be called a plan. He tried to think through his objectives in greater detail, but all that came to mind were potion recipes.
He began to write down the full history of potions released over the past decade, when the bedroom door opened.
"Oh, Snape!" exclaimed Malciber as he entered, followed by several of Severus's dormmates. "I thought the Marauders had finally killed you."
"I see you're not very happy about my resurrection," Severus replied sarcastically.
The comment earned a laugh.
"You know I'm joking," Malciber said with a grin. "You're our favorite half-blood."
"How are you feeling?" Evan Rosier asked, ignoring Malciber completely. "Slughorn said you broke your leg on the stairs. Shouldn't you be resting?"
"I'm fine," Severus replied. "I don't have time to lie around in the hospital wing."
"Yeah, we can see that. Already working on Potions homework?" William Wilkes glanced at the parchment on Severus's bed, but he immediately flipped the parchment over.
Wilkes rolled his eyes. "What a nerd."
After a few more minutes of pointless conversation, they left him alone and began rummaging through their bags, preparing for class.
Severus wasn't entirely sure how he felt about his so-called friends.
They were united primarily by their interest in the Dark Arts and their future service to the Dark Lord. Beyond that, they had very little in common. Sometimes it seemed to him that they only tolerated his presence because Lucius Malfoy had made it clear during their first year that excluding Severus would be a mistake.
Of all of them, only Evan possessed anything resembling genuine kindness. As much kindness, at least, as could be expected from a future Death Eater.
If Severus wanted Lily to remain his friend, he would have to distance himself from them. Especially from Malciber and Avery. Fortunately, it would not be difficult. Most of them barely spoke to him outside of classes anyway.
"Are you coming to lessons?" Rosier asked.
"Yeah."
Severus packed away his notes, slung his bag over his shoulder, and headed toward his first class.
It felt strange to be a student again. And incredibly annoying. By the end of his third lesson surrounded by hormonal, emotionally unstable teenagers, he had already sworn to find a way out of Hogwarts as soon as possible.
The Marauders did not confront him. Perhaps they felt guilty. Lupin could barely look him in the eye.
Black, however, was not prone to such displays of conscience. During dinner, Severus noticed him whispering something to Pettigrew while repeatedly glancing in his direction.
Snape couldn't help but smile crookedly. Nor did he look away.
How had they never realized Pettigrew was the traitor? The boy practically radiated sycophancy and weakness. And people like that often committed the most despicable acts.
But he didn't like the fact that the Marauders would return to his bullying so quickly. He should tell Lupin to keep his friends on a leash.
After dinner, Severus sent an owl to Lucius.
Although he knew that asking Lucius Malfoy for help was not entirely unlike asking the Dark Lord himself, he had very few alternatives.
None of the other students could lend him a hundred Galleons. Nor did he have any professional contacts in the potions community at the age of fifteen.
So he wrote a carefully worded letter requesting a loan and promised to repay it with interest as soon as the potion was patented.
Two days later, an exhausted eagle owl landed on the Slytherin table carrying a large wooden box.
The bird looked personally offended by the entire journey.
It dropped the package onto Severus's plate with enough force to splash pumpkin juice onto the tablecloth, fixed him with a glare that suggested this was somehow his fault, and immediately began attacking a bowl of bacon.
Several students looked up from their breakfasts. A package that large naturally attracted attention. Especially when it was addressed to Severus Snape.
Malciber leaned across the table.
"What did you order? A new wardrobe?"
"Or a girlfriend?" Avery suggested.
Two guys erupted into laughter. Severus ignored them. Without bothering to explain himself, he grabbed the package and rose from his seat.
"Where are you going?" Malciber called after him.
"Somewhere quieter."
"That confirms it's a girlfriend."
Severus did not dignify the comment with a response.
The corridors were mercifully empty this early in the morning. Most students were still finishing breakfast, which meant he reached the Slytherin dormitories without interruption.
Only after closing the bedroom door did he place the box on his bed. With a flick of his wand, he released the locking charm. The lid opened and immediately the scent of rare potion ingredients filled the room.
Severus examined the contents carefully.
There were several ingredients that were difficult to obtain legally without connections. Especially Mandrake leaves out of season. Not to mention Occamy eggs.
All needed ingredients were present and fresh. Everything was exactly the quality he would have purchased himself. There was no need to worry - the Malfoys did not tolerate poor quality.
In a separate compartment from the ingredients lay a small bag of Galleons.
Satisfied, Severus reached for the accompanying letter.
Severus,
Since we are friends, I would rather not burden you with a loan. Consider this an investment in your remarkably bright future as a Potions Master.
In return, however, I expect to be the first person informed of your successful creation.
Lucius Malfoy
Severus folded the letter. He knew better than to be an investment. It never ended well for him. With the first payments for the potion, he would give Lucius back the money for the ingredients.